PARENTING FOR LIFE

In today's episode I talk about the importance of parenting for life. We as parents should never feel as though our work is done. At least for me that's how i see it, I want to remain a parent for life. That's such a gift to me. I hope you all enjoy today's episode!!

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Coming up on the Real Ones Reserve podcast, we'll be talking about Parenting for Life. You don't wanna miss this one, baby. Let's go. Whoa. Now it's your Boy MD veteran and welcome to the Real Ones Reserve podcast. But we talk about real things that need to be talked about. Disclaimer, I'm not a licensed psychologist, therapist, Good people. It's your boy md, the veteran owner and representative of the Real Ones reserved podcasts and company. Good morning, Good morning, good morning. Good morning to you. We up bright and early, you dig? But actually it's not bright and early outside. It is still kind of dark, but we doing our thing baby. We up, energize ready to go. So let me tell you guys a little bit about this podcast. This podcast is meant to be inspiring and motivating for you all. We do this by providing relatable content to let you all know that you're not alone. And that's always on every episode that I like to stress the importance of why I do this show. I do this show for my own mental health, and I do this show for all the people like me who need to feel like they not all jacked up. So most of all, I like to help people. I love helping people. I love, um, encouraging people, giving them a spark of energy, giving them hope. That's dope to me. So as I mentioned in the beginning of the show, this episode is gonna be titled Parenting for Life. Are y'all ready to get into it? I don't think you read it, but here we go. Somebody asked a question. Hmm, md Why do we need to be trying to parent these kids for life? Parenting your kids for life is a joy. It should be a never ending cycle. You should be parenting your kids from afar when they become adults. But this thing never stops. Now I still have young kids. My kids are 16, 15 and I have two 14 year olds now, I already know when they are older, I'm gonna treat them like an adult. I'm not gonna raise my voice. I'm not gonna treat them like they're little kids anymore. But I'm gonna be there in they corner just as a resource, just if they need me, you know? And on top of that, I'll still be a father. Now, when they graduate from high school, I know they get a diploma. I know we get a diploma of some sort. I don't believe that high school diploma says that you graduated from your parents' house. I don't think that says it on that diploma. I don't think your diploma says, Hey, I'm done. I don't ever have to deal with these people again. I don't think the diploma says that that diploma is just another step in adulthood. At least that's how I'll see it for my kids. I don't believe it should be a time of celebration just to get your kids out the house. Having them graduate from high school is a joyous occasion, no doubt about that. Them graduating and going on to college, that's a joyous time, no doubt about that. But them leaving your house, you having like a countdown on your phone, counting down the seconds in the minutes and so on and so forth, that's ridiculous. And I believe that a lot of parents now today are like that. They just wanna get their kids on out the house and say, Hey, my job is done is time to live my life, bro. That ain't acceptable. It's not acceptable. Like to me, how can you go from raising someone until they 18 to 20 years old and just kicking them out and acting like it's done? Like they're completely dead to you. You've done your job, you're completely hands off. I don't believe parents should act that way. I think that's pretty childish and selfish. I look at it like them. My babies, they always gonna be my babies, regardless. I'm the one that raised them. I'm not saying I'm gonna be like g got guy in front of they family or anything like that. But hey, we always gonna have this relationship where it's loving like a mentorship, like a, um, just being a father to them, you know? And that's just my heart, man. I don't know how y'all feel about y'all kids, but I love my kids. Also, parenting for me is showing the kids an example. An example of what not to do, what to do. I'm not saying you should have every scenario worked out for them, but if you could save them some pain,<laugh>, you should, You know, if your kid is humble, if they're eager to learn, hey, fill'em in. Let'em know. Let'em know what traps and challenges. Uh, wait for them on the outside or just be there to catch them if they fall or when they fall. And do your best to keep it real, because that in itself provides so much value. I remember growing up, man, I thought you had to be perfect. You couldn't get in trouble. It's like somebody was holding this big, uh, tracker of how many mistakes you made. And I was scared to make any, for real. I'm like thinking, God, uh, whoever going to come down here and uh, scold me, you know? But what I learned with that is you learn from that, man. Everybody gotta take a lick. But for real, like, I wanna be involved in every part of my kid's life. As long as I I'm alive, then I wanna be in my grandkid's life and I wanna be in their children's life. If I'm still around, I'm gonna be that old crusty grandpa. And you know, my wife gonna be that old crusty grandma<laugh>. Now maybe I've been watching too many Disney movies, reading too many Hallmark cards or something, but hey, I wanna be babysitting, uh, my grandkids. I wanna be, you know, heavily involved. Because if it's not about family, then what's it really about? Ain't nothing else really lasting. You could pass. Well, you could pass certain objects around, um, but they won't last forever. A family name, family tradition, things of that nature, that'll always last. Now, don't be that parent that's well, I ain't never have nobody to show me. That's why I'm still like this. Uh, cut that mess out because you are grown up now and you have the ability on your own to get better or to want to get better. You can't stay inside your same little bubble for ever and think that's acceptable. Or how about your parents with that mindset that are in competition with your kids? What is wrong with you? I'm gonna be happy and proud of my kids. I want my kids to, uh, surpass me in every aspect. That's how I know I did my job. That's how I know my wife did her job. The kids surpass us. Hey, we happy. We ain't stressing about nothing. Now I know parenting is a very hard job, but that's one of them jobs that's never done. It's never done until you in the grave and you are not bearing any fruit. You're not presenting any addition to life. And I don't know about y'all but me, bro. If I'm not doing anything and just taking up space, yo, get me out of here. I'm not serving nobody. No purpose. I'm not making anyone better. I'm not making any situation better. Get me up outta here. Life is precious. All of these different moments are precious. They're gone In an instance, we should appreciate all these things, all these different activities, all these different holidays with our family. That's what they're there for. Because I tell you what, I ain't trying to zoom through anything at this point. I remember being a young child, a young teenager, and wanting to zoom by and get outta my parents' house because yeah, obviously I wanted my freedom. But man, nowadays, everything flying by, every activity, every memory, it's all flying by. And that's why I'm so serious about this Parenting for Life thing. Life is so short. We all say it. We say this thing, um, I don't know how many times throughout the week, life is short, older time is moving so fast. And another truth is, some of you parents that don't like kids like that, you're missing out. You're missing out on them growing up, them developing different skills and different traits and you know, just seeing how they blossom as a person. You're missing out on all these different things. And you know what I say to that? That's a shame and shame on you. And this is the crazy thing. You can only work for so many years. What are you gonna do when it's just you and your spouse or whoever and you have nothing left to do? Especially some of you guys that don't like traveling, that don't like going anywhere but your house. What are you gonna do with all of that time? Waste it. Watch tv, Barbecue. I don't know. Parenting for life is extremely important. It's important because I'm almost tempted to look up the definition of parent right now because a lot of people who I know, uh, I don't think they understand the severity of that position. A parent is supposed to be a powerful individual in their children's life, especially if you work the, You're supposed to be able to influence your kids constantly, no matter what their age is. You're supposed to be there to just a be there with them for the journey. I'm not saying be all in your kids business, be all in their marriage, be all in their relationships. But no, just be there. You don't have to make yourself known in every situation, but just be available. Be available to talk. Be available to just listen and listen to how crazy this is. If you are able to sit there, watch the news all day, watch the stories all day, like they used to call it in my time. Watch the stories all day. Watch cooking shows all day. Watch, uh, maintenance shows all day. You should be able to give your kids five to 10 minutes of your time because I'm sorry if you don't do that, if you don't do things like that, at the bare minimum, I'm sorry, you are not a parent. You are just an adult with children. You're not a parent. And I hope I'm making that absolutely clear. For a lot of people who think they're parents, you're not a parent just because you have children, you're an adult. That's it. And some of y'all ain't even adults. It is kids raising kids because you may be an adult by age, but mentally you're a child. And please don't do that because you guys are passing on some bad cycles of people, people that don't invest in their kids, who don't show them genuine love and care. Y'all are just creating bad people that are gonna create other cycles of bad people. And here we go again, and can we please stop with the old school mentality of parenting? And what I mean by that is that old school mentality of telling your children they can ask you questions, grow the hell up. That's just stupid to me because how can you get clarification if you don't ask questions or that's a counterproductive statement. If your kids go to school and you tell them to ask the teacher questions, if they don't understand that is completely asked backwards,<laugh>. So you mean to tell me They could ask their teacher for clarification, but they can't ask their own parents for clarification. Oh my goodness, you don't see how crazy that is. I mean, I don't know who taught that as a sign of respect for your elders not to ask questions back in the day, but that's stupid. I mean, who doesn't like being understood or understanding something from someone else? That's the whole, whole part of communicating, right? To understand one another, to talk about things. I mean, this Parenting for Life thing is extremely important to me. It's extremely important that I keep a lasting relationship with my kids. I mean, some people just don't think about anybody else but themselves. A selfish person does that. A selfish person will want their kids outta their lives forever so they don't have to worry about them. One less problem, one less thing to worry about, right? Like me and my kids, we have a love hate relationship. I love'em all the time, but I hate them a little bit at times because they just work my nerves like no other. And I'm sure I do the same thing to them. But I tell you what, in the morning, I just like to make them breakfast randomly sometimes just to see'em all confused and dazed and beautiful looking<laugh>. I just truly enjoy that. And man, I'm telling you, my kids are how I stay up to date on some things. They come telling me about the latest trends, you know, the latest rumors, the, the, the juicy gossip that's out there, the new trendy words, dances. I wouldn't keep up with all that stuff myself, but that's how you stay in the know of things. You talk to these young people and you get a understanding of what's going on in the world. And I think it's just amazing to watch these personalities at work. You know, the kids are just funny little characters, you know, they, uh, they all make me laugh. So I'd be a fool if I ever wanted to be out of their lives for any reason. I have very high expectations to them doing great things in life, but I'm enjoying this time right now, just watching them work towards who they gonna be in life, you know? And it's very hard raising these kids. It's a challenge every day. It's something new every day. Um, but I'm up for that challenge. I love that challenge. That challenge is going to pay off someday, and I look forward to that. I'm motivated to parent for life. I don't ever wanna stop being dad or granddad. I don't ever wanna stop being that until I can't anymore, until I'm done, until I'm outta here for neat though, donesky. So let's take pride in this Parenting for Life thing. It shouldn't be a zero to 18, a zero to 20 thing. It's a for life thing. It's a beautiful, such a beautiful journey that I'm enjoying. I truly am. All the good, all the bad, Hey, it's all worth it. And not only do I do it because I enjoy it, I do it because I know my kids are gonna appreciate it One day I know they gonna look back and be like, Dad, man, you was the man. You never gave up. You never lost faith in us. That kind of stuff gives me chills, gives me goosebumps. You know, I'm a big old cry baby for my kids. I'm sorry I am, but they my heart, you know, And I don't take anything or any memory with them for, for granted. And I know life is fast. I know life is busy. I, we get lost sometimes in the mumbo jumbo of just the, the grind of it. But we cannot lose sight of these precious moments or making these lasting memories. We cannot forget about these things because truthfully, tomorrow isn't promise. It's not, I hear too many times say, Hey, I was just talking to such and such man and, they died yesterday. We gotta parent for life. We gotta do the things that are important in life. All of these different things that we have going on, they really don't matter. They really don't hold any importance when it's all said and done, because this is gonna show on you tombstone. Uh, do you want yours to say he was here? Or do you wanna say loving father, loving husband, great man will be missed upon blah, blah, blah, whatever. Something beautiful of that nature. But ladies and gentlemen, I want you to take this Parenting for life things seriously, and just look at it in the right perspective. We aren't always gonna have this opportunity. We aren't alive forever. It's not that way. It's, it's not a movie where we could replay this thing over and over again. So, wrapping up today's show, uh, we talked about Parenting for Life, and I hope that today's message hit home for you. Kids are just such a gift and we have to maximize our time amongst each other. We have to make such a great impact in each other's life. Otherwise it's just useless and a waste of time. So again, I want to thank you guys for joining me here on the Real Ones Reserve podcast. And as always, it's your boy, the veteran. So who you think.