Season 6: Missed Opportunities

Embark on a journey of spiritual renewal and self-discovery as I recount my transformative experience at a women's retreat organized by Sister to Sister, our church's ministry. Inspired by the encouraging nudges from my friends Lana and Milan, I attended the Women's Retreat for the first time. Guided by the wisdom of our First Lady, Anna Hannah, the retreat's focus on resetting, refocusing, and renewing faith paved the way for profound personal and collective breakthroughs. Witness how the Holy Spirit prompted me to capture these pivotal moments and the missed opportunity because of my lack of follow through.

Celebrate with me as I reflect on the incredible reach of this podcast over the past two years, connecting with listeners across nine countries and 95 cities—all without the crutch of social media. Despite feeling initially discouraged by the lack of impact in my hometown of Chicago, through prayer, I found peace in knowing this podcast serves a greater purpose as a gift to God. Listen as I share the lessons learned about trusting divine timing and guidance, and the importance of embracing our gifts with urgency and authority. This episode serves as a powerful reminder that our endeavors, when rooted in faith, have the potential to impact lives far beyond our own expectations.

Transcript

Speaker 1 0:08

Welcome back to Vision in the Valley. I am still struggling with my cough, so please forgive me. I just wanted to tell you that I especially love this season of the podcast. I've learned so many things about myself, specifically my childhood. I'd never really dealt with some of the things that occurred in my childhood, like being a product of rape or the regret of not being able to go into high school from the third grade. That denial in particular left me feeling like I'd always be behind in my successes, and I know that sounds a little strange, but for me which I didn't even realize I was doing this that no matter how great my successes were, I always felt like I was behind schedule. I'd always feel like if I'd been allowed to move forward, my life would have been better In my mind's eye. I would be able to escape the abuse and move into my rightful position, if you will. And although I did a decent job of quote unquote handling my truths, I hadn't resolved any of those issues. I was mindful enough not to let them bar me from happiness, but because of that residual feeling of being robbed, I had began to manage my expectations and I shared that with you all. I didn't realize that when I was managing my expectations, I was also managing my expectations of what the Lord would allow me to have. That was so big for me. In fact, the season kicked off with the ladies graduating from sister house. I later discussed how the beautiful blessings were coming together so rapidly. It kind of threw me off my equilibrium. I even had a few self-discoveries about how allowing people or meetings or tasks to cause me to feel overspent and, lastly, I shed the shame of that rah-rah in me in exchange for knowing that God put the rah-rah in me but to glorify him. These are all discoveries and breakthroughs that the Lord allowed me to have prior to the women's retreat. Now, I say that because the women's retreat I'm going to tell you all about it was just a weekend full of breakthroughs and it's just interesting to me that he allowed me to go through my own breakthrough, if you will, several in fact, before the actual retreat.

Speaker 1 2:52

The retreat was sponsored by our women's ministry at New Life, called Sister to Sister, and we took a trip to the cabins nestled in Salem, wisconsin. It was very reminiscent of my Bible Witness camp life that I spoke to you about some seasons ago. It was like going home for me. I was also really tickled, if you will, about watching the other women experience that newness of what camp life is about. It was very cute and it was funny at the same time. But I'll tell you, it didn't matter what your experience was before you came. We all walked away with the same experience as an experience of breakthrough.

Speaker 1 3:41

We were led by our First Lady, anna Hannah, to focus on listening to God's voice, and I just love that. She referenced 2 Corinthians, 4, 7 throughout the retreat. That was our focus point. But she emphasized reset, refocus, remove, renew and repurpose. That's what we did, collectively and separately.

Speaker 1 4:15

Now it's important to note that I've been a member of New Life for over nine years, but this was my first time attending the annual retreat and I was encouraged by two ladies in particular, one you've heard me speak about before, lana she actually I met her at church and we've become fast friends sisters in fact and I promised her that this year I would not allow anything else to get in the way of me attending. I gave her my word that I would be there. My new friend who is also a coworker, milan she had began encouraging me to go as well, and both of these ladies are younger than I am, and I just love that. They have a passion for the Lord, especially having said that they're younger than I am. And so Milan had not attended the retreat, so she and I had agreed that we'd go together. In fact, she was quite insistent on keeping up with me, checking in with me, and I just took that as a complete direction from the Lord like you must attend this year's retreat.

Speaker 1 5:23

So I did, and as I prepared my bags for the trip, I heard instructions to pack my mic and my podcasting equipment. And I thought about it for a second and I looked at all of the stuff that I had already packed in this very large suitcase and I thought man, you know, that's a good idea, but it's just too much, I'll have to carry too much. So I continued on with going through my packing checklist and I was reminded again to pack my mic. So this time I said that's the Lord speaking, that's the Holy Spirit speaking to me. Pack the mic, stop playing. So that's what I did. I packed the mic, I even put it in a separate suitcase and off I went. I had no idea how to bring it up. I didn't know how the Holy Spirit would lead me or use me. In fact, I prayed about it all the way on the bus and even throughout the time that I was on the grounds.

Speaker 1 6:28

When we arrived, the cabin leaders helped with removing the luggage from the undercarriage of the buses and I noticed that there was a lady that grabbed. You know, I had matching suitcases and so she grabbed them and she set them aside and we were all supposed to go up and retrieve them. It was really random, so I thought right. In fact, the idea that I saw who you know took the luggage off the bus is something that most people probably wouldn't even notice because they may have still been on the bus. But here I saw the person who was helping. So I went over to retrieve my luggage and she didn't know me and I hadn't met her yet. Here we were. She didn't know me and I hadn't met her. Yet here we were. So I want to say a shout out to Adrian, who was my cabin leader. She was the person who actually took the luggage off and when I think in hindsight about how intentional God is, it's so funny to me now, but I didn't think about it at the time. She worked tirelessly to ensure that every participant had the full camp experience, had the full retreat experience, and I'm just very thankful to her for that.

Speaker 1 7:41

So we got our luggage and we were getting familiar with the grounds and introducing ourselves to our new sisters, and each cabin had a side A and a side B, with a different leader for each of them. I met beautiful, gifted, genuine women, and I just put an underline under the genuine because that is so, so important, right? I know you feel me when I say that genuineness of it all. And I knew that my friend circle had just enlarged. So hello, jessica, stormy, nita Carvetta, just to name a few. And I must also tell you that I was bunked next to a woman that I had not seen in over 14 years, had no idea she attended New Life and she was my youngest daughter's cheer coach back in Pop Warner days, right? So, hey, jewel aka Lisa, I'm just, I mean, I'm telling you, look at God, 14 years I hadn't seen this lady.

Speaker 1 8:45

So breakthroughs were happening at every session and, I'm sure, in every cabin, because they were certainly happening in my cabin On the last day. I walked past a table. We had gone to the lake to complete one of our sessions and it was very inspiring. It was very emotional. It was just a beautiful time. I'll get more into it because I'd love to have some feedback from people who attended. But on our way back from the lake I passed a table. It was a picnic table and it was perfectly positioned by the lake and I thought, okay, that's where I'm supposed to go. I'll come back to this location and I'll have a quiet moment with God and I'll talk to him and I'll record, like I do. And then I thought, well, whoever wants to join me will be welcome and I'll just go with the flow, whatever happens from that part. So I said to myself this is why you were told to pack that mic, but I didn't go back, why you were told to pack that mic but I didn't go back.

Speaker 1 9:55

And after the very last session, we were told to go back to our cabins and discuss our experiences with each other inside of the cabins. And then I said to myself that's why I'm supposed to bring the mic right. It's like okay, that's it, that's it. So I went to my leader and I expressed that I brought this equipment. I didn't have any idea what I'd be using it for, but if she'd like to set it up, we could do that and she could lead discussions and we could have a conversation like that. And she was very she was surprised that I had the equipment for one, but she was, you know, very open. She didn't say anything in particular like let's go do it or no, you can't. It just was like okay, wow. And then I walked on to the cabin and I ran into the other cabin leader. I told the cabin B leader the same thing I told my leader, which was that we could offer this recording to First Lady Anna Hannah and Pastor Erica Glenn as a gift right for all of the work that they put into putting the retreat together. Well, neither one of them took me up on the offer, but it's important to say that neither one of them said no to me either. I will tell you that I never opened the suitcase.

Speaker 1 11:19

It was a missed opportunity. I was so worried about overstepping and honoring the hierarchy. That is a real thing for me. I think I'm overly sensitive to it. To be honest, I was so worried about leaving them with that feeling that I ignored what the spirit was telling me. The missed opportunity wasn't on them, they were being fruitful. It was on me. It reminds me of Matthew 25, 14 through 30.

Speaker 1 11:49

This is a parable about the bags of gold. You know this one. A wealthy man had to go on a journey, but before he goes, he calls his servants and he gives them gold. You see, they were all given varying amounts of gold to oversee right, each of them according to their ability. The wealthy man went on his journey trusting that they do their part. He came back after being gone for a while and was ready to receive his reports from them. Right, he was ready to settle up, if you will. The point was that two of the servants went out and they were fruitful. They doubled what was originally given to them. The last servant was worried, was worried about the wrong things, and so he buried his gold. It didn't grow in interest, it didn't yield any return. In fact, it came back to the master the same way it was given to him. That's how I felt about that unopened suitcase hidden under my bed, buried under my bed.

Speaker 1 12:52

The entire retreat, the cabin leaders did what they were supposed to do they doubled what was given to them. I did not. The idea or the inspiration to bring it wasn't given to the cabin leaders. It was given to me because neither of them had a podcast, so it wouldn't make sense. But it was given to me because that was according to my ability. Now, this wasn't about me, but I made it about me. I didn't want to hurt feelings. I didn't want anyone to feel like I was taken over. I want it to be like I want it to be thought of as a team player. The problem with that is that I was given gold to use that should have returned value. Right, it should have returned value for the Lord. He is my master and I his servant.

Speaker 1 13:46

So my friends, drea and Jessica, tried encouraging me one evening we had just met to discuss my fall in love with your purpose brunch event and I explained to them that I loved my experience during the retreat. I explained that I witnessed all these different women shifting and I also knew that the breakthroughs that I had before the retreat were very timely. God is so intentional. I said one reason was clear to me I was in a freed state of mind and it allowed me to witness to another woman in the cabin instead of being caught up in the emotions of the breakthrough Right. But I knew that wasn't the only reason. Both Jessica and Drea wanted to protect me by saying that I'd achieved what I was supposed to do when I came, whether I opened that suitcase with the mic in it or not. And that was really sweet, because that's what friends do they find the good in what you've done and they honor it or they try to honor it. I knew that there was more and I had to own it because I didn't want to make that mistake again.

Speaker 1 14:54

Today. I'm saying that it's important to respect hierarchy. I still agree with that. It's important to respect order. I still agree with that. Neither told me not to do it. They didn't prevent me from moving into my assignment. If the order of hierarchy is important, then following my master's plan would have been the only thing on my mind. Then following my master's plan would have been the only thing on my mind. When you're being directed by the spirit to do something, do something, complete your assignment. I think when God asks me to do something I consider difficult, I stand 10 toes down in it. Right, get out of my way. I'm so serious about it. But when it's something within my reach or my control, I hesitate. I think I'm wondering if it's me or if it's the Lord speaking to me, but either way I was acting like the King of Israel.

Speaker 1 15:53

When he was instructed to dip and wash in the Jordan seven times to be cleansed and healed, right In 2 Kings 5 and 14, that seemed too easy to afford the blessing of healing from leprosy. He wanted something grander to prelude his blessing. He was told to dip, and dipping was all that he needed to do to be cleansed, be healed and to be restored. But that just didn't seem enough right. That's kind of how I felt about pack that mic, like that was so simple to do and yet I hesitated and I never even took it out of the suitcase. He'd already given me all the instructions I needed, just like dip seven times. He already gave me the instructions.

Speaker 1 16:38

Pack the mic, because I've been doing this podcast for two years now and I am not on any social media platforms, partially because that's just not my thing and I just wanted to really worry about getting the content out there. But the podcast has reached nine countries in 95 cities and counting, all without social media. How does that happen if the Lord's not actually taking it across seas? Even with those amazing numbers, I've been struggling with the idea of not impacting the city of Chicago the way I thought I would. Every time I look at the stats, I'm so encouraged Don't get me wrong. I'm so encouraged because it's amazing, but I struggle that most of my audience they're in places that I've never been.

Speaker 1 17:33

So I keep saying to myself you've got to do this thing better, you must do this thing better. The other day, the Lord reminded me that I told better, you must do this thing better. The other day, the Lord reminded me that I told him that this was a gift to him, and immediately I felt this, this sense of relief, because my birthday was in August and so much has happened that I still have something. I've unwrapped my gifts, but I still have some things in their original packaging, and some of the things I'm talking about are things that I wanted. I'd had it on my wishlist for a couple of Christmases even and so they're important to me and they're near and dear to me, but with everything I have going on, I've not yet opened them. I've not yet used them. I've not yet opened them, I've not yet used them. But if someone were to come into my office and take them out, I would be offended and I would be upset, because it's something that I wanted and I do have it. Now it's mine, so I get to unwrap it and place it wherever I wanted to, whenever I'm ready to do that, because it was my gift.

Speaker 1 18:35

It made me realize that he can do whatever he wants to do with the gift that I gave him. That was such a blessing for me and I felt an immediate release, like pressure was being lifted off of my shoulders. I was worried about the wrong thing. He's already taken it across seas and all I had to do was take it across the state line. Sometimes it's as easy as pack your mic. Friends, let us be sensitive to his every request. Our God is forgiving and he's patient, but let us respond with a sense of urgency and make the most out of every opportunity to serve him. Let's own it and let's move in authority. I can't wait to talk with you soon.