Relating to Singleness

Hebrews 4:14-16; 1 Cor. 7:7-9; 7:32-35

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SPEAKER_01 0:00

You're listening to IUF at KSU Podcast. If you have a Bible, go ahead and open up to First Corinthians. We're actually going to look at two passages tonight. So 1 Corinthians 7. And then if you want, you can uh kind of dog ear Mark chapter 3, but it'll also be on the screen if you just want to follow along there. So 1 Corinthians 7, we'll be starting by looking at verses 6 through 7, and then we'll jump over to verse 25 through 35. And really quick, normally in large groups, what we do is we read through a book of the Bible. But this semester we're doing something a little bit different. We're doing a series on relationships. And we think that's a really good topic to cover because the Bible has a lot to say about relationships, and we all live in different kinds of human relationships. And tonight, though, we're talking about a very interesting take on relationships, which is thinking about singleness, which in a weird way is thinking about our relationship when we are not in a romantic kind of relationship. But the main thing I want you to see for this whole series as we go along is that you were created by God to love and to be loved in relationship with God and with others. Alright, let's turn now and read 1 Corinthians chapter 7, starting in verse 6. Now, as a concession, not a command, I say this I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. Now jump over to verse 25. Now concerning the betrotheds, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy. I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. This is what I mean, brothers. The appointed time has grown very short. From now on let those who have wives live as they have none, those who mourn as though they were not mourning, those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it, for the present form of this world is passing away. I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit, but the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord. Alright, let's flip over to Mark chapter three. We're going to look at verses 31 through 35. Mark chapter 3, verses 31 through 35. And it says this, and Jesus' mother and his brothers came, and standing outside, they sent to him and called him. And a crowd was gathering around him, and they said to him, Your mother and your brothers are outside seeking you. And Jesus answered them, Who are my mother and my brothers? And looking about at those who sat around him, he said, Here are my mother and my brothers. For whoever does the will of God, he is my brother and my sister and my mother. This is the word of the Lord. Thanks be together. Alright, uh, it's October, so you know what that means. Halloween is coming up. Woohoo! Any Halloween fans? Uh Halloween is filled with lots of spooky stuff, lots of scary movies, things like that. And uh, I was thinking about one of the scariest experiences you've probably experienced in your life. It fills you with anxiety and dread. You know, it's when you go home for the holidays and your grandma looks at you and says, Are you dating anyone? Is there someone special in your life? And you would rather die in that moment, let's be honest. You would rather just be dead than have to answer that question. Uh it's terrifying, it's anxiety-filling, it's dreadful, and yet we've all been there before. Uh, tonight we're talking about singleness. And look, when it comes to singleness, especially in Christian circles, uh, at times uh there can always be a weird messaging on it, as if being single is somehow being a lesser state of being, and then somehow you like graduate to marriage. But the truth is uh we will all likely experience singleness more than once in your life. Uh I'm assuming that most of you are not dating people in this room. You're you're single in some way right now, and we often think about that as like, okay, but that's just when I'm young, but someday I'll meet someone, and then I'll never have to think about being single again, I'll never have to deal with this, I'll have graduated of that step. But the reality is uh we live in a broken world, and oftentimes spouses die uh one before the other. I was reading a book, and uh the guy was saying, yeah, my grandfather lived another 50 years after my grandma died. As a single man. He lived to a hundred years old. Uh couples get divorced, right? That not every marriage lasts. That the truth is you need to wrestle with the fact of singleness. You need to wrestle with the fact that you may only be married for a season of your life and you may be single again. And I don't mean that to scare you or something like that, but more to the point that singleness is something we need to talk about. And more importantly, the Bible talks about it. Uh so let's get into scripture and see what it has to say. I have four points tonight, four things I want you to see. The first thing is what singleness is, what singleness is. The second thing, what singleness is not. I know I'm very creative. What singleness is, what singleness is not, what singles need, what singles need, and then finally, what singleness does. What singleness does. Alright, let's look at what singleness is. The first thing I want you to see from our passage tonight is that singleness in the Bible is actually seen as a blessing. It's actually seen as a gift. If you look back at 1 Corinthians chapter 7, Paul here, he's writing to this church, and this church in Corinth, they were having all sorts of weird problems, and people were like, well, like Jesus has come, so like, do we even need to get married? You know, what's the big deal with that anyway? You know, didn't he like die for all of our sins? So why does any of this stuff matter? Uh and Paul, he's been trying to coach them, trying to help them to think as follow what life uh as a follower of Jesus is, but he does tell them here, look, I actually wish that you were all like me. And what he means by that is single, Paul never got married. So the writer of a big chunk of our New Testament never got married. And he's saying, I wish that you were all like me, but I recognize that each person is a different gift from God. Uh, and that it's not a requirement for everyone to be like me. But the fact that he calls it a gift here is very telling. Because he's saying, look, it's not a bad thing if you're single, and it's not a bad thing if you're married. Both of those things are a blessing from the Lord in their own way. Both are a gift. One is not better than the other. But the truth is, we tend to see singleness, whether it's the messaging of our culture or the influence of our family, or just our own longings, we tend to see it as a curse. We tend to see it as some kind of failure or some kind of junior state of being. But the truth is the Bible sees it as a blessing and as a gift. But thinking about it like a gift, uh, it's kind of like a gift you don't want. Uh so I'm thinking about like uh visiting my young cousin years ago. He was very little at the time, and uh he really wanted a dump truck-shaped cake for his birthday. He was really into trucks, as little boys tend to be. Uh, and so his parents worked really hard. They found a like a cake decorator who would make a special design one. They made a really awesome-looking truck cake, and they brought it to him. We're like, we got this truck cake, isn't it amazing? Blah blah blah.

SPEAKER_00 9:15

And he just burst into tears and he's like, I don't like it, I don't want this cake. We're like, why? What's wrong? He's like, it's not a dump truck, it doesn't do this thing. I don't want it. It's like, it's this amazing cake, it is a truck, but he's like, I just don't want that.

SPEAKER_01 9:31

Um that, you know, sometimes when you're feeling anxious about your singleness, you kind of like start to think back to second grade. And you're like, you know, maybe that boy in the playground who like proposed to me with a leaf, maybe I should have said yes. You know, like you're just kind of feeling like I don't want this gift of singleness. I would rather, I'd rather be married, I'd rather have the gift of marriage. Alright, so what is the gift of singleness? We're describing it as a blessing. What does that mean? Well, Paul says uh further on here in 1 Corinthians chapter 7 that the blessing of those who are not uh committed to someone in a covenant marriage, he says they actually are anxious for the things of the Lord. And so anxious there isn't always a bad thing. He's saying they are devoted to the Lord, they care about the things of the Lord, they can give their time and attention and energy to the things of the Lord, as opposed to thinking about a husband or a wife. He said that that's one of the gifts of being single. I love how uh Sam Alberry, who writes this book called The Seven Myths About Singleness, which is a really good book, really short, you should check it out. Uh, he says, look, we need to remind ourselves daily that singleness is not just for us, but it's for the Lord. Alright, why is singleness a blessing? Why is singleness a gift? Because it's a way to serve God. And that's a good thing. We are blessed when we serve Him. And so let's get real specific. What are some ways that you can serve the Lord when you're in a season of singleness? Uh, what are some ways you can experience that blessing in this season? Well, let's think about your time, let's think about your gifts, let's think about your resources. Because you can serve the Lord in those specific ways when you're single, in ways you can't when you're married. Let's think about your time. Uh, hey, a lot of you are in college, maybe you're not dating anyone, you're not married yet. Uh, and what does that mean practically? It means you can come to stuff like RUF on a Thursday night. Uh, y'all, like, I'm married, and you know, I have kids, and so I have to like talk to my wife about, alright, I'm gonna have to go, like, this is part of work and stuff like that. Like, we have to arrange our schedules, you know, like it's not a simple thing just to be here. Where, you know, I'm not trying to speak down or anything, but for some of you, you're like, I was taking a nap 10 minutes ago, and I just rolled in here, and I'm, you know, like I'm feeling great. Uh, I had nothing else going on. That in no way is like me trying to talk down to you at all, but more just the reality that you have time. You have time that you will not have when you're committed to someone in a marriage. You have time to meet up with people to read the Bible and therefore grow in your faith. You can meet with me or Grace or Bruce or anyone else in RUF. That's a blessing to you. You have time to get involved in your church and serve in your church. You have time to go to other campus ministries. Come on, how many of y'all are going to a campus ministry every single night of the week? That's awesome. That's great. You're not going to be able to do that in a different season of life, but you can now, and that's a blessing. That's great. You can go on mission trips, you can go serve the homeless. There's an abundance of ways that you can be poured into spiritually and pour out to bless others spiritually that you are not going to have as much time to do later on in life. That is one way that a season of singleness is a blessing. What about your gifts? Well, you can use your unique talents to serve the church and serve the world. You know, whenever someone says, like, I'm married to my work, uh, that's kind of a reflection of saying, like, I can I can put my all into this. Uh and I'm not giving my time to maybe other areas of life. And, you know, to be married to your work is maybe a good thing when you're single. Like, you can give a lot of your talents, your passion, your energy to it. It reflects your ability to really give yourself over to a certain project or a certain ministry. That's why it's generally wise to finish your schooling before getting married. It's not a requirement, but there's real wisdom to it because you're not gonna be able to give all of your attention to things like school once you meet someone and commit in that way. Or what about your resources? Y'all, you can actually be more generous with your money in a season of singleness than once you meet with someone. Because once you get married, you're gonna have to have hard conversations with your spouse. What are we doing with the money? Why? What if you want to do this, but I don't, right? Like, you can't just decide, hey, I'm gonna like be generous and help someone out in this way, I'm gonna donate to a charity or a ministry or whatever. And look, you right now may not feel like you have much money, but you at least only have to think about your own needs and not necessarily providing for another. There's a simplicity that allows you to actually give in greater ways proportionally. I like how one other campus minister in RUF put it one time, he said, look, we tend to put down singleness because we put up with too much of this world. We love this world too much as opposed to the things of God. In singleness, you get to singularly invest in the kingdom of God without end. Working for a king whose reign never ends, for a treasure that can never be taken away from you, even by death itself. That's power, otherworldly power, that Jesus offers us. Don't be satisfied just by the things of this world and get caught up in its messaging. No, the Lord is offering you great blessings even in a season of singleness. Look, God says singleness is a gift because you can give your undivided attention to the kingdom he's bringing to this world. I mean, think about it, we just prayed the Lord's Prayer, right? Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. And you don't have to talk to a spouse about what that means for our family and our finances and our schedule and all that. That you can engage in that in a very full way. The other thing I want you to see about the blessing of singleness is discerning how singleness is a long-term singleness is a calling in your life. That Paul is saying, look, I'm not saying it's for everyone, but pray and think about if the Lord is calling you to it. Because it is an opportunity to serve the Lord with your life in a unique way. The Bible doesn't command us to all be single. It's not everyone's calling, but let me challenge you all tonight, you should at least consider it. I know that sounds radical, and everyone's like, oh, what, me? No, I don't want that gift. But you should at least consider it. If you have faith in Jesus, pray in it. Hey, are you calling me to long-term, lifelong singleness so that I can serve the Lord in this way? That would be a good and biblical thing, as hard as that would be to accept. And there's a great example of that who died just a few years back. His name is John Stott. He's a really famous British pastor. He wrote a lot of great books, he traveled a lot, he started a lot of like missions, conferences, and stuff. He helped really revitalize a lot of churches in England that were failing. He never got married. His whole life he was single. And there was a great interview, you can look it up, uh, where someone is asking him about this. Uh, and they asked him, like, hey, did you like take a vow of singleness? And he's like, No, not at all. A lot of people think that, but he's like, I actually, you know, I dated two different women at different points. I thought we might get married. It just didn't work out. And then over time I realized, hey, I think the Lord is calling me this way. And he says this at the end of his life. He says, looking back, with the benefits of hindsight, I think I know why. I could never have traveled or written as extensively as I have done with the responsibilities of a wife or a family. It was a gift to the church that only God knew. You know, he didn't have some like telescope into the future and knew that that's exactly how his life was gonna pan out. But over time, he discerned that's what the Lord was calling him to, and he embraced it, and he served to the fullest of his abilities till the day he died. So let me ask you a question before we move on. Do you view your singleness right now as a gift with which to serve God? Or do you view it as a curse just to endure? So let's look at the second point here. What singleness isn't? What singleness isn't? As we said, like we tend to see it as a curse or some kind of failure on our part, uh, or some kind of flaw in the system, whatever it is. So we try to come up with like explanations for singleness, some way to blame it on something. You know, it's like uh, you know, men these days are just like awful, and that's why you just can't meet a good one, or like, I don't know, women have too high of a standard, and you know, something like that. Or uh we come up with even like overly spiritual reasons. You know, maybe I just need to like grow in my faith first, and then God will bring the right person. And there's this great writer, uh, her name is Paige Brown. She actually was one of the first RUF interns. She started the campus staff program back in the day. Uh, she's on staff at a church in Nashville now. But she has this great article about when she was single. And she wrote it this way. She said, Look, warped theology is at the heart of attempts to explain singleness. As soon as you're satisfied with God alone, he'll bring someone special into your life. And she says, Look, no, as though God's blessings are ever earned by our contentment. Or what about, you're too picky, as though God is frustrated by our fickle whims and needs broader parameters in which to work. Or what about, as a single, you can commit yourself wholeheartedly to the Lord's work, as though God requires emotional martyrs to do his work, of which marriage must be no part. Or before you can marry someone wonderful, the Lord has to make you someone wonderful. She says, as though God grants marriage as a second blessing to the satisfactorily sanctified. Accepting singleness, whether temporary or permanent, does not hinge on speculation about answers God has not given to our list of wives, but rather on celebration of the life He has given. I am not single because I am too spiritually unstable to possibly deserve a husband, nor because I am too spiritually mature to possibly need one. I am single because God is so abundantly good to me, because this is his best for me. It is a cosmic impossibility for God to do anything better for me right now than being single. The psalmist confirms that I should not want, I shall not want, because no good thing will God withhold from me. What she's saying there is look, your singleness is not the result of like weakness in you. It's not the result of a weak spiritual condition. It's not the result of like you just not going to church enough or knowing your Bible enough. It's not, you know, you are fatally flawed, and until you're delivered from that, then God will bring it. Or once you hit a certain level of maturity, then God will bring someone. No, it's just a season of life. Your singleness. And the truth is, marrying someone will not cure all your problems or your loneliness. Surprise, surprise, you can actually be lonely within a marriage. That's one of the reasons why divorce happens. Like, it doesn't always work out. If God is good, then your singleness is not an inherent lacking on your part. You are single because God is good, and this is his best for you now. Alright, but let's think about how like our modern world kind of responds to all this. Uh our modern world, uh, secular world, like kind of responds to this issue of singleness with a bit of a paradox. It doesn't really know how to handle it. It says, okay, like the modern world will say, I agree, you don't need a relationship. To fulfill you. But you do need sex to fulfill you. That's the modern world's take on it. You don't need a relationship to fulfill you. You're like your own whole person apart from that. You know, you don't have to have a husband or wife. But you do need sex to fulfill you. According to the world, if you aren't having sex, then you must be a repressed loser. Think about movies like the 40-year-old virgin. Like the whole joke in the title is he's so old and he's never had sex. What a loser. Like, that's the world's attitude about people who are living single. It reminds me of a really kind of this is a gross quote from a guy I went to high school with, but just remember, he was 15 when he said it. So hopefully he's grown up a lot. But I remember him saying, I don't know what we're talking about, but he was like, look, if I'm still like a virgin by 30, I'm just gonna go find a prostitute. 15-year-old, 15-year-old, keep that in mind. But like, it's very telling that it was like, I have to have this, I've gotta have the sex no matter what. I gotta get it by any means possible. Life is not worth living apart from it. Look, y'all, we've been saying this whole semester, you were created for relationships. One type of relationship is marriage, which includes sex. That is a good thing, but it is not required for your life. You know, you are not an animal that has some biological need to breed constantly. Sex is a good gift, but it is not the goal of life. What is the goal? Well, our catechism helps us, right? What is man's chief end? To glorify God and to enjoy him forever. The goal of life as a Christian is to glorify God and to enjoy him. Do you hear the joy in that? That actually we get great joy when we glorify God and experience his glory. That seeking God's glory first leads to true and lasting joy. And so this modern paradox of you don't need a relationship to fulfill you, but you do need sex, leads to a very interesting modern solution, which is it's fine that you be single. The modern world has no problem with you being single because sex doesn't have any deeper meaning, and therefore you don't have to be married to have sex. Singleness is preferable, actually, to the challenges of marriage, as long as you can still get sex whenever you want it. That's the modern world solution. That there's this kind of growing trend of like, yeah, I'd actually not, I don't want to get married because it's too complicated. I had two different friends, a guy and a girl, I remember when I was kind of in my 20s, who said to me in separate occasions, I don't really want a husband or I don't really want a wife. I really just want kids. It's like I don't I don't want that part of it, I don't want that commitment. I just want the children. And look, I love children, that's great. Sometimes people have to raise children as single parents, that's wonderful. Uh, but like, I don't think they realize what they're saying. What they're saying is, I'm not willing to sacrifice and commit for this person, but I do want this little child who will like love me and praise me and give me validation. I'm willing to sacrifice for that, but not this. Like it ends up being a very selfish approach to singleness. It reminds me so much of that great line from Frozen. You know, I know you mean well, believe me be. Yes, I'm alone, but I'm alone and free. But that's Elsa's whole attitude. It's a good thing to be alone. I'm finally free. I don't want people telling me what to do. But ultimately, we see Elsa is not better off. Her heart is slowly freezing, right? And the whole point of Frozen, spoiler alert, is that her sister has to sacrifice her life to save her, to break her frozen heart, to give her a heart of love and fleshy once again. So, look, when we're thinking about singleness, often people are wondering how do you live a life of singleness when it comes to self-control, especially when it comes to sexual temptation and stuff. And look, like I said, our modern world doesn't even have categories for it. Our terminology for this is very old-fashioned. We talk about things like chastity and abstinence, and we're like, are we living in the 1800s? That's because the modern world is like, there's no need for any of that. You don't need it, it's just a biological necessity. Well, once again, I love how John Stott, when asked this very question, addressed it for his own life of singleness. He said, Look, we Christians must insist that self-control is possible. We have to learn to control our temper, our tongue, our greed, our jealousy, our pride. Why should it be thought impossible to control our libido? To say that we cannot is to deny our dignity as human beings and to descend to the level of animals, which are creatures of uncontrolled instinct. What he's saying is actually, by the power of the Holy Spirit, you can practice self-control, and that's actually dignifying to who you are and who God made you to be. That's not some impossible task that Jesus is asking of us. It's a hard task for sure, but not impossible at all. Jesus sees you as more than an animal. That you are more than an animal that just needs to eat, sleep, and breathe. That you are made in God's image, you are worthy of dignity, even in your singleness and in your self-control. And ultimately, what do we see in Scripture? Well, Jesus, the fullest expression of God's image, his very own son, to ever walk the earth, he was never married. Jesus was never married. He lived a life of singleness. And guess what? He still sought deep and meaningful relationships with God, with his heavenly father, and with his disciples and with the people around him. And that is what we need ultimately. That we need deep and meaningful relationships with God and with others. So that's my third point. What singles need, what singleness needs. Let's flip over to Mark chapter 3 really quick. I love this passage. This is Jesus, right? He's preaching, his disciples are there, and people say, hey, like your mother and your brothers are outside. They want you to like leave behind this ministry and go home and just be a good son. And he says, Look, who are my mother and my brothers? Whoever does the will of God, he is my brother and my sister and my mother. That Jesus is telling us something profound here. That you may have a biological family. Maybe it's wonderful. Maybe it's awful. I don't know. Everyone has a different story. But the point is, by faith, you are called into a new family in Christ Jesus. That you automatically are united with Him and with one another, that we have these deep relationships that we can grow because Christ is at work in them. That what you need in your singleness is community and friends and family and church. I said this a couple weeks ago during our marriage talk, but look, as a Christian, marriage is optional. But being involved in the body of Christ, the church, is not. If you're a Christian, being involved in the body of Christ, the church is not optional. God has given us space to experience deep, intimate friendships for people in all stages of life, single, married, or otherwise. He's given us his church. Don't neglect that. I love how Paige Brown goes on to talk about this. She says, look, to be single is not to be alone. If someone asks if you are in a relationship right now, your immediate response should be that you are in dozens of relationships. Because our range of relational options are not limited to getting married or to living in a soundproof, isolated booth of Miss America pageants. Christian growth mandates relational richness. Christian growth mandates relational richness. The only time folks talk about human covenants is in premarital counseling. But if our God is a covenantal God, then all of our relationships are covenantal. The gospel is not about how much I love God because I typically love him very little. It is about how much God loves me. My relationships are not about how much friends should love me, they're about how much I get to love them. No single should ever expect relational impoverishment by virtue of being single. We should covenant to love people, to initiate, to serve, and to commit. So let's think about this question. How can we create this kind of community here at RUF that gives space and encouragement to single people to grow in their identity in Christ and what he may be calling them to in this season of life? How can we foster that here? We want that kind of community where people feel comfortable in that instead of being constantly asked like your grandma, like, are you seeing anyone yet? No. How can this be a good and healthy space for people in a season of singleness? Well, I've got four thoughts here. We could add a lot to this, but four just really basic thoughts. First up, as Jesus tells us here, we need to see one another as brothers and sisters in Christ, first and foremost. And not just as a potential dating pool. You know, come on, you know you've done it. You walked in this room, you kind of scan, you're like, alright, who's hot, who's not, you know, like I know it's gross, but y'all have done it. Don't lie. We need to get rid of that kind of thinking and see one another as brothers and sisters in Christ. Right? That we are united as a family first. Alright, but also the flip side of that, let's not turn when people do date into like a little gossip storm. Y'all gossip in our community, it really harms it. It actually keeps people in singleness because they're like, I don't want to go out with anyone because then everyone's gonna talk about it, and I'd rather just like stay alone and you know not have to worry about it. Let the gossip die. People gotta try some stuff, y'all. People gotta ask some people out and see if it works or not. So let's go about that in a mature and godly way. Unless it's like clearly sinful, then your focus should be on the Lord, as Paul tells us, and not on who is talking to who. So just let the gossip die. Alright, second thing. Be the change you want to see. There's an old kind of cheesy phrase that says, if you want a friend, you gotta be a friend. Maybe your parents told that to you. Um it's like, hey, we all want to be pursued, but sometimes you've got to take the first step. Sometimes you've got to pursue other people. You've got to love other people, you've got to invite people into your life in the way that you want to be invited into theirs. Don't be afraid to take the first step. Thirdly, remind each other of God's goodness regularly through the scriptures. As we've heard over and over again tonight, it's God's goodness that we're in the season of life, but we easily forget it. So we need to remind each other of that over and over. And then finally, we've already said this, but we want to keep hammering on it. Get involved in the church. And I'll add to that seek out someone who's older in that church that you can get connected with, that maybe can mentor you or meet with you, because it's a blessing to be in a church family with people of lots of different ages and stages. You don't need just friends your age. You also need friends who are in different seasons of life, who can give you wisdom, who can invite you into their home and feed you and all of that. Recognize that for most of you, singleness is probably just a season. You're probably not called to it long term. But you won't know for sure unless you try some stuff. Students ask me this all the time: like, how do I know what God is calling me to? Well, I think about my own calling to ministry. That's what we call it, even in formal theology, a calling to ministry. Uh, did I hear a voice from heaven? No. No, I did not. That's not how it usually works. A calling is, hey, I have I have an internal sense. I think God is leading me this way. But I also have external people in my life who are saying, hey, I think you'd be good at this. And then also that opportunities open up, doors open up to try it and to see if the Lord really is calling you to it. So look, how do you know if God is calling you to long-term singleness or not? You're gonna have to try some stuff. You're probably gonna have to go out on some dates and see if it works out or not. Uh, that honestly, it's trusting the Lord and the ups and downs of it and seeing what he confirms or keeps you from. Alright, final point here, very short, what singleness does for us. Singleness ultimately points us to the goodness and the sufficiency of Jesus. If marriage is a picture of the gospel and a beautiful picture of Christ's sacrifice, then singleness is a beautiful picture of Christ's sufficiency for us. That he is good enough for you and me all the time. Paul later on in 2 Corinthians says, look, like I was struggling with something, and I prayed over and over for the Lord to take it, and the thing he revealed to me is, my grace is sufficient for you in your weakness. That Jesus is sufficient for you in this season. That singleness is a great time to learn to abide in the love of Christ as completely sufficient for you. However long or short this season may be. Or maybe if you find yourself in singleness again later on in life, this is a necessary skill for us to develop as Christians. The danger of rejecting this gift of singleness in this season and not learning that Jesus is sufficient for you can really damage actually you and your faith. Because the truth is, if you're not even open to this being true to you long term and you're seeking contentment in relationships, man, like you're gonna get hurt pretty easily. It's a dangerous game to go into the dating scene if you're seeing singleness as a curse. Because you can chase after romance because you hate being single and want to avoid that at all costs, but you'll quickly find yourself in relationships that are ungodly and that are straight up harmful to you. So find if you find yourself just as lonely now, uh just know that being bonded to another person who doesn't share the same kind of faith in you can leave you even more lonely. The promise of the gospel is not that you'll be married here on earth, but the promise of the gospel is that God is good and has committed to you eternally. That in one sense, if you are a Christian, then actually you will all be married someday. In one sense, if you are a Christian, in one sense you will all be married someday. What do I mean by that? Well, if you go to the very end of the Bible, Revelation 19, it talks about a wedding ceremony. The wedding of the Lamb to the church, Jesus to his bride, the church. That actually that is our long-term destination. That if you're in Christ and part of his church, then actually you are already committed to your Savior Jesus. That there is a wedding that you're going to. So whether you experience one here on earth or not, you will experience it one day fully in Christ. That's what singleness points us to. That Jesus is good, that he is sufficient for you and me, and he's committed to you eternally. How do we close? Well, once again, the words of Paige Benton Brown write this so well. She says, look, can God be any less good to me on the average Tuesday morning than he was on that monumental Friday afternoon when he hung on a cross in my place? The answer is a resounding no. God will not be less good to me tomorrow either, because God cannot be less good to me. His goodness is not the effect of his disposition, but the essence of his person. Not an attitude, but an attribute. I long to be married. My younger sister got married two months ago. She now has an adoring husband, a beautiful home, a whirlpool bathtub, and all new corning ware. Is God being any less good to me than he is to her? The answer is a resounding no. God will not be less good to me because God cannot be less than good to me. It is a cosmic impossibility for God to shortchange any of his children. God can no more live in me apart from the perfect fullness of his goodness and grace than I can live in Nashville and be Paige Brown. If he fluctuated one quark in his goodness, he would cease to be God. Shout out quarks for all of our sinners. What a beautiful way to wrap it up, right? That God is so good in his essence, he cannot change in that. And that is something you can bank on in whatever season of life you are in. Amen. Let's pray together. Father God, we thank you for your goodness. We thank you that you commit to your people out of your abundant goodness. That Lord, you've had mercy on us. Lord, that you would deliver us from our sins, give us the hope of new life in Christ. So, Lord, help us in the waiting, in the in-between, in the lonely nights, in the hard days, that you'd remind us of your presence, and that you'd bring physical embodiments to us in the church and in your people to encourage us and appoint us to the goodness of God. We pray all this in your name. Amen. Let's stand and sing.