191 What If Your Free Time Is The Problem

Greatness isn’t a personality trait, it’s a routine you’re willing to protect. We’re talking about what “be great on purpose” means when summer break hits, the schedule loosens, and it gets easy to drift. We share the mindset shift that changed everything for us: stop waiting to feel ready and start building habits that make growth inevitable, especially if you’re trying to lead as an educator, school administrator, or role model at home.

We dig into why communication skills sit at the center of real self-improvement. When people can’t name what they need, they can’t get help, and that’s true for adults and students. We reflect on how practice beats “natural talent,” how support systems change outcomes, and why the best progress is the kind you notice in yourself before anyone else compliments it. That private win is proof your personal development work is working.

Then we get practical about time management and work ethic. If your goal is better health, more money, or a stronger career, your “personal time” matters as much as your workday. We challenge the distractions that steal hours, unpack the gap between what people want and what they’re willing to practice, and talk about mastery: study people who are already great, copy the parts of their routine that fit your life, and put your work toward you instead of only toward someone else’s business.

If this hits home, subscribe, share the show with someone who needs a push, and leave a review so more people can find it. What’s one routine you’re committing to so you can be great on purpose?

Transcript

Summer Break With A Purpose

SPEAKER_00 0:13

What up, Doe, and welcome back to I'm Growing Man. Schmecond D in the building. Uh, we are officially in on summer break. However, I am still working, uh, trying to cut the curve on what any great what a great administrator is supposed to look like. So I am constantly trying to find ways to improve. Um I'll be off for a few days, though. My official day to go back is August 6th, but I'm definitely in the building on a regular basis. So I'm not saying that to say that I'm complaining, but I want I want you all to know how intentional I want to become

What “Be Great On Purpose” Means

SPEAKER_00 1:05

as far as being a better administrator. Like I want kind of really ties into what I'm gonna talk about today. A question was asked, what does be great on purpose mean? What it means to me, you know, I guess it really kind of just depends on what it means to you. But I'm gonna tell I'm gonna t show you or try to explain what it means to me and why I am intending on walking this way. You know, you your entire life you get these the stories of people in your past, and we learn about them in schools, depending on what country you are, will determine what story you may get, but depending on who you are, you may be you may be somebody that you that they they would learn in every country. So when I think about be great on purpose, these people that we study, I don't think that they were in their right mind saying, I am going to become this person. I think they just kinda had a great routine and they mastered their craft where other people was able to talk about them. So when I look at my life, you guys know uh a lot of well, majority, if not all, of my information comes from from prior teachings, different practices depending on, you know, what spiritual beliefs you may believe in, but I would like to believe that I'm open and I'm open to learning from any and everything. And I got to this point because I feel like everybody is good at something. Why would I shut somebody

Respect, Openness, And Past Mistakes

SPEAKER_00 3:03

off because of whatever I think I'm supposed to practice? As long as I'm not hurting people, I feel like everybody is gonna get respect from me. You know, if you're not if you're not doing anything to hurt me or hurt the world, I'm gonna respect you because I already know how difficult it is to be in this world. And if you can live a solid life without compromising yourself, like you're you're a different kind of person. Because some some people are compromised at a very young age and don't even know it. But and you know, I was one of those kids. I definitely compromised myself, created excuse after excuse on why I could do the things that I was doing, the consequences I was getting, didn't change my behavior. But now that I'm I would like to believe at a mature mind that I'm able to explain why I was making those terrible mistakes and how I can hopefully change a few people's minds about how important they are. So when I say be great on purpose at the end of my shows, it was inspired from a good friend of mine, uh, Mr. Lyons, Mr. Montrell Lyons. He's a fraternal brother of mine, but he's he's a good friend also. Uh he says some inspirational things. But when I heard be great on purpose, you know, when you hear great, there's only few names. You don't name everybody, you know? And I'm like thinking about all of the people that we've considered great in their area, and I'm like, why am I not in in these categories? And I realized that I wasn't really working on anything. I was probably great at being a social butterfly, but nobody gets rewards or awards or benefits that can help you grow from that, if that's all you could do. So I'm sorry I keep moving around, but uh I think I'm I'm a little fidgety. I don't know why. But anyways, I just wanted to work on areas that I could get better in, specifically communication. You know, when we hear about communicators, great communicators is always somebody who's like in a tough time and they're trying to articulate the needs of others, or they're able to inspire people to do more there. So I want to do that. But I'm like, I'm doing this on purpose because I feel like I'm gonna be 50 in less than two years. If I could have learned about this journey sooner, I think my quality of life would have would have been better. And being that I'm here, like let's say if I die, right?

Why Communication Becomes The Focus

SPEAKER_00 6:10

The last seven years of my life has been the best part. Every part of it, even the worst parts of it, it was learning moments. It allowed me to grow in areas that I didn't know that I needed to grow in. If I could have started this journey sooner, I think everybody around me would have benefited from better me, of course. But depending on how long he allows me to keep walking and waking up and using my noodle to improve, I think that I will continue to hopefully become the person that I I'm inspiring others to become, you know. Um I I enjoy waking up just to work on the things I work on because I know the work that I'm doing. And and I was thinking like, what is the best reward like with within yourself is when you can recognize something that you know you've been working on and nobody told you about. Like it's it's wonderful to get compliments from other people because of something you're working on. But when you work on something and you can see the difference, it's a different ownership. And I can't imagine if I was an elementary school or middle school and somebody was able to put words together for me to say, hey, you could become really good in this. You just gotta put the time in. And this is just a sidebar. You know, like a lot of people, a lot of kids don't understand. It was like this, he's way smarter than him, or these kids just have practiced those areas more than you. Like if you put the work in, the time, and somebody can give you the support system that they got that complemented your learning style, you could know just as much. That's the reason why hopefully we can inspire these kids to understand it's okay to let adults know where you're struggling in, because if you can, we can help you better to fill in those gaps. And that's the problem. That's why I say with communication. Just imagine if we can convince a student to tell us when they really need help, and they accept the help, they receive the help, that's a different kid. Ultimately, you want to get the help to the point where you don't need it anymore. It's not to put to put a crutch on you, it's to help fill in your gap so that once you leave here, you know how to operate. And if you don't, you can ask for help. So being great on purpose requires me to wake up every morning. And I say every morning, I mean every morning, like sick or not. Like this is like brushing my teeth. Like when I had COVID, I had COVID like three, four times during this span, and I completed my routine. And now I have a physical routine. Like, I want to be as intentional as possible. So being great on purpose requires me to follow a routine that when I look at these other people, people say that they're great. Everybody talks about the work that they put in. I can't

The Quiet Reward Of Real Growth

SPEAKER_00 9:43

get that unless I put the work in. So as I continue to move through life and find ways to improve, hopefully these words will inspire people to say, I can do that also. And when I say that, you don't have to do what I'm doing. You can do whatever you like doing because the time you put into it is going to develop you into this person that you didn't even know you could become. But it's gonna take work. Like, and that's that's what the the I think the missing piece in life. Everybody say you have to do this to get this, but we haven't seen it in real time. So we have to say words to convince people like you are supposed to be the example in your area, unless you go out specifically and find people who are really good at what they do and you learn from them. But if not, you may have to be the example to inspire others in your area. You know, the biggest difference between people who are being praised for what they do and people who aren't is the amount of work. I I think your common person, me maybe even, I think maybe 70%, at least 70%. And you know, my wife always says, you always throw people off when you use numbers. But I just want y'all to know how serious this is. In my mind, uh at least 70% of people have no idea the amount of work to make that much money versus where they are. They, and I used to be a part of this, so when I say they, it was me when I was in this, because I would I realized like, how you how are you supposed to make more money and you don't go to work all the time? Or you're not working on something so that it can generate more money. Like, you do overtime, but you spend your money. So your money's not really working for you. You you really going to work for your money. And I think there's a there's a gap. And you know, like I said, I used to be a part of this and I realized that I pretty much had to start over. I just had uh a little more experience where it wasn't like starting over, but it was like, dang, you gotta, you're really taking baby steps. You have to learn how to do this and do that. So as I continue to to work on areas, I feel like I will eventually inspire people to use a lot of time that they're wasting and invest it in themselves where they're gonna create a product that they didn't know that they could because they were distracted by things that don't matter as much when you believe you're that important. And when I say this, a lot of people say, you know, I know I'm important, but what are you doing with your time? Is your time preventing you from getting you where you want to get to? When I say that, like say, check this out. Let's say if you just want to lose weight, what are you doing in your free time when you're on your phone scrolling, when you're watching television, when you're on social media apps communicating back and forth, what is that doing to help you in your goal? That's what I say is it a distraction. Now, you could have these other things where you say, I did this for the day, this is my reward. But from the research that I've seen, people who do that on a regular basis have no idea how much time they're actually spending on those different forms of technology. So you can't really be working on your diet. I think in order to truly practice being great on purpose, you have to study other people who are already considered great. And when you do that, you have to ask yourself, what about my routine is helping me to become that that looks similar to whoever's been doing it? You know, whenever I see any professional athlete that like to talk about how they got there, there are things that I look for that are very similar to

Work Ethic, Time, And Money Reality

SPEAKER_00 14:04

the things that other people say that's in a different place. And it's really just work. If you're like like people try to make work a bad thing, like, you know, I say this, like it's almost like you're you're like, you know, how you go to work for another company and you work your whole life, you're making that company better. Like, if you did the work and it was toward you, you would get a different product. That's the reason why I think college is so important. College is the place where you're going to get exposed to so many different people, cultures where you could truly find something that you're interested in and pay some teachers, some professors who are really good in that craft to give you what they got in a short period of time where you could master it and make money not even important. And when I say that, if you're really good at what you do, money's not an issue. You probably don't know how to manage money, but your mastery allows you to make mistakes. But just imagine if you learned how to handle money. Money would not ever be an issue for you again because of mastery. So I'm telling you all, if you're going to become the person you're supposed to become, you have to use the time that you have. Eight hours sleep, eight hours work, eight hours personal time. What are you doing in your personal time? And some of you, like I'm blessed enough that I work in an area where I can practice in real time and get feedback from students, teachers, parents, different colleagues, any and everybody who enters my building. I get to practice everything that I'm learning because at the end of the day, the school is a resource. And we're here to help those who are looking to be helped. And sometimes we have to say the right things to convince these students to learn how important they are and how to learn and how to ask for help. Like I said earlier, we have to work on communication because most of them have no idea what help really means to them. So being great on purpose, it requires you to really believe you can do it. So depending on how old you are, I'll tell you this. And depending on what you've done, your journey could be really quick. And when I say quick, I mean like the learning lessons for you to be able to benefit from it. The reason why it's taken me so long is because the things that I've done, I've been learning the actual work ethic of it all. You know, I may have some experiences, but I haven't gotten the reward from it because I haven't put enough time into it. But you could be totally different. You could have had a wonderful work ethic, but you didn't do certain parts to increase your chances of being rewarded. But or you or you may just be at the very beginning. But no matter where you are, you could have fun. I I'll tell you, I I look back and I'd be like, man, I wish I was younger. I could have like been different and all of this. But I'm glad I started because if I didn't start, I couldn't imagine just lifing for the rest of my life. And those of you that know lifing, lifeing is just like you just connecting the dots, you know, and when you can be present and in the moment, everything can be a way more intentional

Mastery, College, And Learning Fast

SPEAKER_00 17:41

where you can you can be proud of the work that you you're doing. And I think that's the reason why I I really started to take this journey and record it. Because I don't believe people know. I know people are gonna say there's gonna be like the reasons why I was able to find this, but this anybody can do it. When I say anybody, I mean anybody. It I'm not gonna say it's it's difficult, it's not difficult, because at the end of the day, I could tell you the steps of doing everything, but the person that's gonna get in your way is you. Because there are things you're supposed to let go and things you're supposed to stand on, and you're not gonna know that unless you have somebody walking you along the way. And experience is only gonna be able to teach you that. So, regardless of where you are, you can get some wonderful kickback for just improving who you are. I know that I have an agenda. I want to eventually become somebody where thousands of years from now people are like, thank goodness for whatever he did. Like, I don't know. And I mean, ultimately, I wanted to deal with communication because I believe that everybody had the potential of being friends, depending on where you grew up, depending on what your background is. Like, it's it was it's by chance. But if we're gonna be smart and make better decisions as we move on, we have to learn how to communicate with each other so that we can let people be people and not worry

Peace, Legacy, And The Closing Charge

SPEAKER_00 19:23

about the negative things that's tearing us apart. And I could spend the rest of my life working on this. So let's say hypothetically I lived uh 65, 70. That's a lot of hours accumulating through intentional work and possible people I'm gonna meet where people may be further along than me, and that can help the world see peace before before they end up leaving. You know, some people, you know, grew up in a war. Some people have been war most of their life, and I don't even know what that's like, but I would like for them to believe that none of this none of this was in like like in vain. Who wants to live that type of life? But I will continue working on myself to be an example for my kids, be an inspiration for my students, be a listener to whoever's looking to grow in ways that can benefit their family. Reach out to me. Y'all make today better than yesterday. Don't worry about anything you can't control. G A T A. Get after that action, or that action will get after you. Be great on purpose.