Long before the iconic double-helix of DNA was discovered by Watson and Crick, humans were manipulating DNA and the genetics of plants and animals through selective breeding. Selective breeding is the process by which humans control the breeding of organisms in order to exhibit or eliminate particular traits. From the Mayan’s selective breeding of wild grain to domesticate what we now enjoy as corn, to the selective breeding of dogs that has given us everything from the mighty mastiff to the tiny terrier. Selective breeding has done more to shape the world around us than most of us realize. If you enjoy your bananas sweet and seedless or your lawn Kentucky bluegrass beautiful – you can thank selective breeding for it.
The peanut butter and jelly sandwich in your kids lunchbox is thanks to this ancient, refined process, too. The bread required baker’s yeast that has been selectively bred for optimum leavening action and even the peanuts for the butter are a specific breed (runner’s peanuts) that give the most consistent peanut-buttery goodness for your tasty sandwich. Even the grapes in that jelly – they were selectively bred, too.
Selective breeding in plants and in animals is a science… but not an exact one. Dog breeding is a good example of this. As dogs are bred to accentuate traits like size, temperament, and even instincts like herding and retrieving – each litter hopefully brings the pack one step closer to the optimal, but that isn’t always how it works. Sometimes, you get a runt in the litter.
Growing up, that’s how I got my childhood dog. Chip was a beautiful sheltie and a fantastic family dog. He was smart enough to do tricks, but gentle enough to put up with how rambunctious and careless my brother and I were as young boys. Chip was the picture of his breed in every respect – he was bred to be a show dog. From withers to coat gloss, Chip had Westminster winner written all over his pedigree – except for one problem. Chip was two-sizes too big. Born a sheltie, he was as big as a collie… and that’s just the way it works sometimes.
And it is that imperfection and randomness of selective breeding that led to the saying, “There’s a black sheep in every flock”
I’m Scott Beyer and this is the Love Better podcast where we explore the truths and lies about love and more importantly how to turn love into a skill – something we can get better at and hone along the way.
This is the third in a series of episodes entitled The Unlovables. There are certain people in our lives and communities that are quite difficult to love. From those that betray and violate our trust to that arrogant know-it-all brother-in-law some people require the very best of our character to love because loving them is complicated by their poor choices and character – and sometimes our character, too. How do you love someone who is self-absorbed? Or ungrateful? How do you learn to love better when the other person isn’t choosing to be better? What about loving someone who is aggressive – even abusive? These are all fair questions that deserve Bible answers. And today, we are going to study an uncomfortable group of people that Jesus was REALLY good at loving, but most of us aren’t. The unseen and the unclean. From beggars to lepers to prostitutes and thieves – Jesus loved those on the edges. The people that for various reasons were culturally, financially, or morally outcasts. How did He do that? And how does He expect us to do that?
The unseen and unclean exist today, too. As of today, there are an estimated 800,000 people in the United States who are homeless. As for criminals – as of early 2024, 1.9 million people are held in U.S. correctional facilities and over 19 million individuals have a felony conviction on there record. A conviction that often impacts their relationships with family, influences their economic status, and has shaped their identity. Over 40 million people have substance use problem with only 6.5% actively receiving treatment. Though illegal in most parts of the country, prostitution exists in every major city and urban area… as well as many much smaller communities, too. And if you add to that list those with major physical disabilities or disfiguring illnesses, it becomes pretty clear that the world is full of people that we, as a society, try hard to avoid and not talk about.
Which brings me back to the black sheep idiom we started the episode with. What’s the problem with black sheep? In 18th century England, sheep were a staple of the economy because wool was the major resource for creating garments. Sheep were breed to be uniformly white. The primary reason for this was that white wool can be dyed in a plethora of colors. You know what color you can dye black wool? You can dye it black. Black wool was not prized. It was considered a waste of an animal. Yet, even with selective breeding every flock continued to have the occasional black sheep. It was just an inevitably of life for the English shepherd.
Part of what makes the outcast difficult to love is how similarly different they are. Black sheep are different than white sheep, but they are still sheep. It is easier to accept the differences between a whale and a butterfly because they are ONLY different… it is why we don’t make apples to oranges comparisons. We make comparisons to things that are similar enough to judge those differences.
When you see someone in a wheelchair or who has an illness the impedes their speech or their gait or their mental capabilities reminds us of how much we depend on those things. They stand as a reminder that health is a fleeting thing. Visiting hospitals is a choice, not an instinct.
In the same way, meeting someone who’s life has been impacted by sin reminds us of our own sins. Sometimes we mask that reminder by focusing on their blame for their choices and their consequences, but only so we don’t need to acknowledge our own sins or the fact that we may have escaped the consequences for similar behavior. A sense of superiority is a nice balm for me not interacting with the homeless, the convict, or the sin damaged.
There is even a psychological term for treating people who are similar, but different with a harsher judgment. It’s called, wait for it, “The Black Sheep Effect”. Ironically, we are hard on the outcast because we are similar, not because we are different. This is why men tend to judge other men more harshly than they do women and vice versa.
Which is where Jesus comes in – while everyone else was judging the black sheep for their differences, Jesus had a way of leaning into their similarities and viewing their differences as needs.
He ate with tax collectors and sinners in Mark 2:15-17.
And as He reclined at table in his house, many tax collectors and sinners were reclining with Jesus and his disciples, for there were many who followed Him. And the scribes of the Pharisees, when they saw that He was eating with sinners and tax collectors, said to His disciples, "Why does He eat with tax collectors and sinners?" And when Jesus heard it, He said to them, "Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I came not to call the righteous, but sinners." (Mark 2:15-17)
Do you notice how Jesus deals with the tax collectors and sinners? He eats with them. Eating a meal is something we all have to do. Food is something we have in common – it is a similarity. Jesus didn’t ignore the differences, but we’ll get back to how he dealt with that part in a second.
Jesus found common ground and similarity of human connection. Sure, black sheep are different, but they are still sheep. Lepers still need affection, so Jesus touched them in Matthew 8. Blind men still have voices, so Jesus took time to listen to two of them when they had requested to talk with him in Matthew 20. In fact, he stopped to talk to them when the crowds rebuked them and told the two men to leave Jesus alone. Jesus decided blindness did not make them less worthy of His time. People are people.
He also found a way of praising them when they did the right thing, even if there was a history of poor choices before. When a woman with a reputation for sin washed His feet with her tears… Jesus defended her humility when she was verbally attacked by a Pharisee in Luke 7. Instead of chastising her, he turns to the owner of the house they are in and says,
Then turning toward the woman he said to Simon, "Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven--for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little." (Luke 7:44-47)
Can you imagine how that made that woman feel? She must have known what her reputation was, and she was aware of her sins… but in that moment she had done a good thing and Jesus praised her for it. He was unafraid to recognize goodness, even when it came from an unlikely source.
The Unseen and the Unclean are people and Jesus talked to them like they were people. He ate with them. He showed them affection. He looked at them and touched them and didn’t recoil at their presence. He praised them and He rebuked them the same as He did everyone else. And that is who God is. God doesn’t play favorites. James warns us against favoritism when he writes,
“My brothers, show no partiality as you hold the faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory. For if a man wearing a gold ring and fine clothing comes into your assembly, and a poor man in shabby clothing also comes in, and if you pay attention to the one who wears the fine clothing and say, "You sit here in a good place," while you say to the poor man, "You stand over there," or, "Sit down at my feet," have you not then made distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts? Listen, my beloved brothers, has not God chosen those who are poor in the world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom, which he has promised to those who love him?” (James 2:1-5 ESV)
God warns us against treating people differently because of their finances, their physical features, even their past. Culture and personal preferences may lead to stigma and prejudice, but Christ warns against being judges with evil thoughts. When it comes time to interact with someone that makes you uncomfortable make sure it isn’t your own prejudices that are the really problem. Now, that doesn’t mean that we don’t hold people to the standard because they’ve had a hard go of it. Pity can be it’s own form of prejudice and favoritism. Jesus didn’t lower the standard for the lepers, the blind, the poor, or the sinner, either.
Consider when He healed ten lepers and only one, a Samaritan, came back and gave thanks, He said, "Were not ten cleansed? Where are the nine? Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?" And he said to him, "Rise and go your way; your faith has made you well." (Luke 17:17-19)
Jesus didn’t lower His expectations for people because they had problems or were marginalized. Leprosy doesn’t make you incapable of showing gratitude, nor does a life of past sin and shame make you powerless to repent.
Jesus saw their similarities and treated them that way, but remember what He said when He was asked why He ate with tax collectors and sinners? He said, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”
Jesus looked at their differences as a need, not a stigma. Doctors look at sick people differently than the rest of us. They see a symptom needing a diagnosis and a cure. Jesus looks at souls the same way. The man whose life has been ravaged by addiction needs a cure. The woman who has accepted the lie that she should be objectified and has allowed sin to envelope her in shame needs a cure. The sick are not less than, the downtrodden are still made in the image of God.
The gospel is good news. And the people that make us uncomfortable, the relationships that remind us of our own fragility and brokenness, the people that interact with would require disrupting our comfort zones need the good news from people who see them as sheep, too.
Perhaps the most important thing to remember about this group of Unlovables is they often believe they are unlovable, too. Jesus disagrees.
Learn to love better. Learn to see the unseen. Speak to the unclean… and greet more than just your brother.
As always, thank you for listening and hopefully we've done something to help make your life a little bit better. If you have a chance to rate, review or share the podcast it would be a blessing. By sharing with others or leaving a review on Apple Podcast or Spotify, you help us reach more people.
I mentioned at the end of last season, that I was revamping my website. An update that was LONG overdue. A special thanks to Brady Cook and Diakonos Marketing for bringing BibleGrad.com into the modern era! If you are interested, you can sign up for a video series challenge through the website called the #HopeDoes challenge. Two short videos each week and a chance to grow in your hope by doing hopeful things. Just go to BibleGrad.com, scroll down and enter your email to get started.
Or maybe you have a fun or obscure history account, a feel-good news story, or a riveting scientific fact you think could help us love better. If so, I’d love to hear it! Feel free to email me at scott@biblegrad.com
And if you are ever in the Louisville, KY area, I’d like to invite you to come worship with me and my family at the Eastland congregation. We meet for worship every Sunday and have Bible classes for all ages on Wednesdays, too. If you want more information about Eastland, visit us at eastlandchristians.org. We would love to worship God with you and help you on your walk of faith.
And as always, until next time, “Remember, you are loved, so go… love better.”
