Conquering Imposter Syndrome: Transforming Doubt into Drive

Each episode is a candid exploration of the challenges videographers & business owners face, including imposter syndrome, social media scrolling addiction, and feelings of isolation. Through personal anecdotes and actionable advice, Damien shares strategies for overcoming these hurdles and cultivating a stronger sense of self. 
• Discussion of imposter syndrome and the feeling of being an 'imposter' 
• Importance of researching and seeking education as a remedy for doubt 
• Strategies to combat social media addiction with effective apps 
• Isolation in business and the necessity of networking 
• Tips for setting tangible success goals to ensure progress 
Let us know your thoughts and how these episodes have resonated with you!

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Transcript

Defeating Impostor Syndrome and Scrolling Addiction

Speaker 1 0:01

Hey guys , welcome back to the podcast . Damien Gray here . I'm excited for today's episode because it is truthfully me . It's just . It's something that we've gone through , that I've gone through a good bit , and I want to expose it and put it out there . And how do we defeat it ? Everything that we're talking about today is going to be something that I have personally gone through and go through at times , and also the solutions that I've built for those things . Right . So there's no questioning here . This is my story , these are things that we've gone through , these are things that I continue to work on and I really hope this helps . Um , this is not a me trying to toot my own horn and saying , hey , I figured life out , because there's still plenty of struggle to go around , but being able to uh , kind of have these things down and to a point where we have solutions built in for it and now I don't fall into the same trap again , that's what I want for you . That like that's it . So , if anything , I hope this encourages , I hope this gives you some steps to take and we can move forward with it . All right .

Speaker 1 1:14

Number one what hinders a videographer from growth ? Imposter syndrome ? That is definitely something that in my research online and throughout my career , I've heard many people talk about the imposter syndrome like , oh man , I don't feel like I can do it , I don't feel like I am myself doing this , like I'm an imposter , like I shouldn't be here . What's interesting is , as I do my research and as I hear about this conversation of imposter syndrome , I think we all have an initial understanding of what imposter syndrome is , but I think I have some interesting points that I think it's imperative to kind of get clear on right . So in my research in this , I had an opportunity to listen to a good bit of podcasts . One that I listen to a lot is actually Jasmine Starr's podcast . If you haven't , highly recommend checking it out . She's very uh great in in listing out frameworks and giving uh business owners an opportunity to take tangible steps in growing their uh going to market strategies and growing and scaling their business . So highly recommend that . Even if it's not , even if you're not , a six figure , seven figure business , I mean so much insight there . She's great Right . So in her podcast she has a little talk about this and she , she , she interviewed high end founders Right , and a lot of them shared that imposter syndrome doesn't exactly look like comparison , right .

Speaker 1 2:39

Like oh man , I'm not like this person or I'm not like that person , right . Imposter syndrome doesn't exactly look like comparison , right , like oh man , I'm not like this person or I'm not like that person , right , but it more so looks like what I'm doing is normal , like you're not saying anything special . You snuck in through the back door . She said you're unoriginal and that's that's interesting , because that is , I believe , how I felt in times . There's so many people saying these same things , or so many people that have gone through similar things , and they've shared it and I've watched it and I've been encouraged by it and I'm like man , that's great . I have felt like that . I'm sorry , I've definitely felt like that , right , but the main difference is you are you and they are them . So the people that you hit , the people that you attract , the people that will watch your content is watching it , because they want to see how you have gone through that struggle . They want to see how you have been able to persevere through those things . And you hit a completely different audience most of the times than the audience that have seen that content . So you have a place in the world of whatever it is that you're pursuing , your voice can actually help and actually can be a great witness to what somebody else is going through , even if it is something that you've heard online before is going through , even if it is something that you've heard online before , just like . I mean , truthfully , you hear , you hear the phrase , uh , nothing is has been reinvented . When it comes to music , right , it's , a lot of those things have been invented before . A lot of those , the music notes and the , the patterns and you know , not going too far down the loop , but those things have been created before and somebody just decided to add to it . They decided to make a change , but it's their perspective of that , right , it's their understanding of that , and so that's what I felt in .

Speaker 1 4:36

Imposter syndrome is like man , people have heard this before . I'm not original . I don't have a perspective , anything different from what other people have shared . I'm not original . I don't have a perspective , anything different from what other people have shared . And one of the things that she shared is kind of what I've kind of started doing a while back is . She said that her solution . Right , you use that desire when you recognize man , I , there's a fear of I'm going to be an original or I'm going to be , you know , already heard . Right , lose my train of thought . There's like different thoughts going on . I really want to get this across , but it's really cool , right , so you use it as a symbol .

Speaker 1 5:18

What do I need to do to get the data that I need in order to make the confident decision right ? So we're not aiming from the hip anymore . Right , I have imposter syndrome about this podcast episode that I'm going to put out , right ? Okay , what information do I need to know in order to be able to walk confidently in this decision , to do this episode right ? What information do I need to research ? What do I need to find out ? Who do I need to speak with ? What kind of questions should I ask them ? Right , and become educated on those things and gathering that information ? So , when you're sharing this stuff , you're not just I think this will work , say , no , this is what I actually discovered . Right , this is what I actually found out . And so we're not guessing anymore .

Speaker 1 6:06

And a lot of the times , the imposter syndrome is just because we're fine from the hip . We don't , we don't know what's happening , we don't know why , we don't know where . We're just kind of going for it . Right , that that has its place in conversation . But when we're talking about growing your brand for your business , or growing your personal brand for yourself , that serves as a mediator to your business . We want to be able to research . We want to be able to have that desire to want to get those questions answered . Why ? Because we know that people are going to have those same questions . People are going to have the same questions .

Speaker 1 6:41

How many podcast episodes there are on imposter syndrome ? And what's interesting is , every episode I watch there's always a different perspective to how people are handling it Right , and so for me , with the ones I've seen , this one and some more information that I'll hit below that I'm going to share later on into the episode these people have gone through and figured out their way of handling that situation . People have gone through and figured out their way of handling that situation and so imposter syndrome , figuring that out , the solution , using it as a symbol . Anytime I feel that , to say , okay , I'm feeling this . What do I need to do in order to get the data that I need to get in order to make a confident decision right ? What do I need to know or learn in order to be less intimidated by that . Right .

Speaker 1 7:24

As I practiced that anytime , I felt that imposter syndrome , regarding whatever I'm looking for , the desire went away . The imposter syndrome kind of dissipated because I'm not pretending to be someone else . I'm literally researching what I the issues or the concerns that I have , so that I know how to come , as a student , to that problem and say these this is what I found , this is the solution that I found , this is the research that I found . What do you think ? And be able to speak with the people that have gone through it . Right , that's how we cure and get rid of the imposter syndrome . It kind of forces us to move our fears out of the way and say , okay , that's cool , I'm afraid , right , but here's the actual problem . Like , here's what I'm actually trying to figure out . Do you have insight ? Oh , wow , I didn't even think about that . Interesting . And after you gather enough information , you're able to share these things . You're able to share with other people what you've come across . Right , so imposter syndrome , right .

Speaker 1 8:29

Number two , scrolling addiction . Now , I consider myself a social media guy . Right , I don't . I wouldn't say that I'm crazy on social media , like , I don't even remember the last time I truly like , posted on Facebook . Um , definitely more on the consumer side , but keeping up with a lot of the social media things , man , even owning a business , it's it's . The desire to want to post continuously is not huge on my radar , right , but there are times where I find myself I'm just scrolling , scrolling , scrolling , scrolling , scrolling , scrolling . And it's true , it just is .

Managing Social Media and Seeking Support

Speaker 1 9:16

And so for me , I wanted to try to figure out how , what's a way , because part of my work is literally scrolling , right , it's going through social media , making connections , looking up what people are working on , trying to see what's happening . Right , that's a part of staying in the know regarding mine and probably a lot of people's work , right ? So how do we control that the amount of time we it ? Um , the things that we look at , right ? Um , the , the , the , the like ? How do we put guardrails on it ? Right , so we're not wasting time , because we know we have a lot of things we have to do in a day , right ? Um ? So I kind of looked into a few different resources . Um , one of the things that I found that was the easiest option that I implemented right after I discovered it was an app that's called no scroll and oh scroll .

Speaker 1 10:14

S C R O , l , l , right , it's an app . It sets a time limit on your selected social media app , um , or really any app that you'd like on your phone . And for me , easy to download , easy app . There's not much to it . You're able to go into the app after you download it onto your phone and you can select which social media , which social media platforms , you would like to . You know , put a certain time limit on it , and so for me , instagram , facebook , tick-to . You know , put a certain time limit on it , and so for me , instagram , facebook , tiktok . You know whatever it is , and you get to put OK , how long would you like to be on it for the day ? And it'll say you know , five minutes , 10 minutes , 20 minutes , 30 minutes , whatever it is . You select what you'd like to do , and so you select it , and then , once it's selected , you go about your business . When you open your app , it'll it'll sorry . When you open the app , it'll say how long would you like to be on this for ? And I think it's for the day , and you select a time , say 30 minutes or an hour or whatever . Boom Press that . Now you go about your social media . As usual , when the time limit is up , it'll literally gray out the app on your phone and you won't be able to get into it Right . And of course , if you need to or you'd like to , you can remove it if you want to .

Speaker 1 11:34

But for me , I liked that , even just that I recognized that I was dropping my social media viewing in a day just because I just I don't know . It just made it very simple to just say you know , I guess I'm done for the day or I'm done for this time , and then I just continued about my business . And I enjoyed that because it wasn't just like I've reached my time limit , it's okay . Now I've recognized that I've been on this for already an hour in my day . No , like , that's good . There's stuff I need to do social media wise . What I like to do is I'll use it on my computer . So I'll go to Facebook on my computer , instagram or whatever , because it's a little bit harder to like , scroll and scroll and scroll . I'll just go to Instagram on my computer , check it out , ok , cool , and then just like a tab , close out the tab and be done if I need to . But just having something as simple as that man . It was really cool how I recognized when it turned gray , just like , wow , okay , I've been on it , yeah , so we're done . We're done with that . Okay , so I enjoyed done , we're done with that . Ok , so I enjoyed that . Yeah .

Speaker 1 12:52

The other thing I did with scrolling addiction another solution that I've came across is that I still need to do . I had one a lot back when we lived in Georgia . But get a bike , yeah , just get a bike , so like when you're working and you're scrolling and you should be working or you should be on a break or whatever it is , just hop on your bike , take a little stroll and come back and then you know , take a break or get some food or continue working , whatever it is . I find that almost therapeutic . I don't know if I maybe I just have a thing with bikes , but I just find it kind of therapeutic where you just , you know , do a little lap around the neighborhood , you know , see what's outside , it's fall now . So it's a great outside Just being able to have that as an option .

Speaker 1 13:39

It's quick , it's quick , it's not you have to like do a lot , you . Just you recognize you're scrolling a lot . You're like you know what , I'm going to take a little ride , pop some music in , listen to a podcast . Just don't listen to nothing Like , just walk , just ride around , you know , and if the bike's not something for you , then you know , I , you know , maybe even just step outside and go on your porch . You know , we're talking very simple things , right ? I'm not disclaimer , I am not a psychiatrist or doctor that can give you anything or any actual like advice to say , oh , you should do this three times a day , I can't . I'm just telling you what has worked for me , right ? So that's scrolling addiction . I have the no scroll app . Sometimes , if I can , when I will , I'll get a bike , do a quick lap , come back , keep it going , stimulates the mind going from there . And that's just what I found to help . There are many other options regarding scrolling and how to . I mean , there's so many . I found so many apps doing that , so you could find what works best for you . I know it's tough in a world like this where things are just continuing to come up online , but I promise you , having a little bit of a guardrail , to say we've done this enough for today , now we're going to go on to our next thing . Man , big , big help , absolutely Okay . Three isolation Now , this is interesting because , as a small business owner , when you're grassrooting everything , you're kind of starting from the beginning .

Speaker 1 15:14

It's you You're trying to figure it out , you're trying to build this process , you're trying to develop the contacts , you're trying to develop the clientele , you're trying to build a marketing plan that you can afford . You know , you're trying to make these connections happen and , truthfully , it gets a little lonely trying to figure that out . You know , and it's not ideal , right , to do all those things alone , especially if you're a kind of person that gets a lot of thoughts in your head , you don't have any way to get it out as a soundboard . You know , you're kind of going for it , right , and that's tough .

Speaker 1 15:52

And so what I've had to do and I kind of need to brush up on this is I have to make things strategic , right , like I have to explore and get help and make it strategic , like I have to make it a part of growing my business , like part of my business plan for my business , right , I have to reach out . I have to extend , like I have , my understanding and I have to extend a handout to get that understanding and knowledge that's past me . Um , that could help me and grow my business . And I have to implement that because if I'm stuck in my head the entire time , it's not going to be good , it's not going to be encouraging , right ? So I try to give myself a quota , right ? So , uh , every month , you know , I'm going to visit two networking events this month and when I go to these events , I want to meet three people that can help answer three questions . That's it . Right , I'm not trying to meet everybody . I'm not trying to shake everybody's hand and get invites to every single networking event . That's , that'll get that much more discouraging , right , I want , I have three questions . I want to see if I can talk to three people that can help me answer these three questions regarding my business growth . Right , and that's it , and that's two networking events for the month . Right , you can , I can join a virtual work study group , like online .

Speaker 1 17:20

They have these virtual groups via zoom or whatever it is , where everyone is kind of working and doing their thing . But you're in a Zoom thing together and kind of talk about what you're working on and you just kind of have a group there . That's there . Sometimes they even offer like soundboarding . It's kind of like a mini masterclass where you kind of have an opportunity to share what you're working on , get some insight from people that have been doing it for a while , et cetera , et cetera . And again , it's just a way to to break that wall , to extend a little bit , to get past the isolation and to get that conversation going . Um , the , the , the .

Speaker 1 17:55

The interesting thing about this is how to explain you won't , this won't go away when you have a million dollars in your bank account from your business , right ? Or 2 million , whatever it is right . You have to add the growth of your business has to be , has to grow in a way where it's who you are like , it edifies and helps you grow . It's not a burn everything , make a million dollars and then all of a sudden things click . The growth has to be organic to you , meaning it's with you , it's it's , it's it grows , how you're able to grow the best way possible Right , as the owner of the business . That has to be there , right . So figure out what that is for you .

Speaker 1 18:54

The networking events , creating a podcast where you get to speak with people who are professionals in their area and you can get advice from them , kind of like something we've done here many times . Grab a work buddy to be a soundboard , you know whatever that looks like . Isolation does not have to be a part of your workflow . Now , it is one thing to be able to be comfortable with being in I'll say , silence but being by yourself working Absolutely . If that's something that's difficult , then you know there are other ways to get help with that .

Speaker 1 19:30

But for the most part , with growing your business , just having those options where you have the work study group online or you have a person that's a soundboard , or you're creating a podcast so you can speak with people or you know whatever that is . Find out what that is for yourself . Like you got to understand this . This is the . This is this helps with the fuel that'll make your desires come into fruition . Like this is the fuel that helps it . Right you are , you will be encouraged by those around you , so definitely look forward to having that right . I hope this is helping . Excuse me , excuse me . I hope this is helping . This is encouraging me .

Speaker 1 20:18

Just sharing this because it's like man as I was going through my thoughts here . I'm like man . We've gone through a good bit of this . As I'm sharing this , I'm remembering times where I felt that isolation . Even now , sometimes you feel that isolation , but to be able to take steps forward in that man , very helpful , right ? Last one , um , what hinders a videographer excuse me , what hinders a videographer from growth and how to defeat it ? The distance between time and result , meaning the distance between the time it takes when you're starting something to actually seeing the result . Right , I think that's man . You got to understand this .

Speaker 1 21:02

We're at our 11th year in business now . Right , and I , you know , just like everyone else , I look online and I see people that have been doing this for four years . Right , four years , five years . You know , and I'm like man easily killing it . You know amazing filming locations crushing six figures . You know seven figures . You know whatever it is , and I'm like man . And here I am in my 11th year and it's not like it's not like the difference in profit or whatever it is is that much . It's just what I'm seeing online . It's like man , these guys have been able to kill it in half the time that I have been able to . Right , and it's like man . There's almost this sense of entitlement . Oh , how about that entitlement that comes to mind when you're like man . I've put in so much time trying to make this happen ? Why , right ? Why ? Why is this happening like this ? Right ? And so one of the things I had to recognize was what ? What I'm doing there is .

Speaker 1 22:11

I'm defining success based on what I'm seeing online , meaning I'm seeing there at these amazing locations or they have these really great projects , whatever , and I'm saying that success and I'm not fully doing that as much as they are , so I'm not being successful , right ? So the question we need to first ask ourselves is what defines success for you ? Right , you define the standard of success , right . And for this exercise , right , since we're talking about what hinders a videographer , I encourage for this , make it tangible , right , and like make it tangible so that way you can , starting out , you can have some steps in pursuing this . Right

Overcoming Challenges and Setting Goals

Speaker 1 23:08

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Speaker 1 23:08

For example , I want to have eight workshops in 2025 where each workshop , each workshop , nets 3K , right ? The tangibility of these goals removes the vagueness , right ? Ok ? So if I want that , how do I actually go about doing that ? How do I actually go about pricing it ? How do I actually , how do I actually create the marketing online that helps with that , right ? So , so it removes my FOMO because I'm not seeing all this online . It removes my imposter syndrome because I'm setting the goal and I'm asking the questions how do I do this so I can get them answered , right ? And now , that distance that we have between when we start and the result now I actually have pieces that builds the bridge to get me from here to there , right ? And now , if I have to do that again let's say 2026 , now I say , okay , this is what we did last year and we got 80 percent of the way there . Now I know how to do that . What do I need to do to get to that final 100 percent ? Right ?

Speaker 1 24:16

So now , being able to fix that gap between when you start and the results , it takes time . It takes time . It takes being able to create that plan of what the success is and how to take those steps . But it also takes creating those , creating that system of all the things that we talked about making sure we're not isolating ourselves right . Making sure we're not getting addicted to the scrolling that we're doing online , make sure we're not feeling the imposter syndrome as we're going through this process , right ?

Speaker 1 24:48

So all these solutions go hand in hand . You kind of can't have one without the other as you're moving towards what you are defining as success , which is why this is the last one right being able to define that success for you , awesome . So solution recap uh , imposter syndrome . Well , actually , what hinders the videographer and how do we just grow and scale from it ? Imposter syndrome how to beat it ? Um , purposely putting yourself in a position . Actually , I'll share this imposter syndrome how do we beat it ? One of the things I've , I've , I've recognized in doing this and , of course , we talked earlier about being able to use it as a symbol to ask yourself the questions that you can become confident in , to get your answers , so that you don't have the imposter syndrome . I'll put it in even better layman's terms Fully removing imposter syndrome is about purposely putting yourself , putting myself in a position to help my younger self . Right , because we're getting those questions answered . Right , that we're looking for , and once we go through that process , we get those questions answered . So now I'm learning and now I've taught myself this thing . So imagine five years down the line . We've gone so far past that Now I can say , oh , you're trying to figure this out for this 2025 year , trying to build a workshop . Let me show you what I did . Right , you purposefully position yourself in the perspective and in the mindset and in the process of helping your younger self .

Speaker 1 26:37

Jenna kutcher's podcast uh , gold digger , jenna kutcher online marketing expert , podcaster , educator . She had Rory Vaden on her podcast at one point . New York Times bestseller , hall of Fame speaker , an amazing guy . He said on her podcast you are always most powerfully positioned to serve the person you once were . It's not about the following person you once were , it's not about the following , it's not about the virality . But building a personal brand is not about you . It's about being in service of the people you can help . So again , that perspective shift when it comes to a lot of times imposter syndrome .

Speaker 1 27:20

What's the thought , me , me , me , right , I feel this way , I feel that way . I don't think this way , I don't think that way . What we're saying is OK , that's cool , that's yeah , that's over there , right , what ? What do I actually need to find out in order to grow in this , in order to do this workshop idea for next year ? In order to do this workshop idea for next year , what do I actually need to pursue ? How do I actually build the attraction , the attention to it ? How do I actually net an actual profit from it . What are the things that I actually need to put in place in order to have a great workshop ? What makes a great workshop right ?

Speaker 1 28:01

Working through those questions and getting insight from people , researching what people have done , how I can say , oh , you know what , this is what I found . Now we're not . Imposter syndrome is no longer a thing . This is what we're pursuing , right ? Same thing with marketing this is what we're pursuing . And then you have permission to go back and say , okay , this is what we're pursuing . Okay , great . So because of that , here's what we're going to do . Right , imposter syndrome is now gone , right ?

Speaker 1 28:29

So solution recap for imposter syndrome how to beat it Purposefully . Put yourself in a position to help your younger self . Ask those questions . Figure out the questions that you need to answer in order to make confident decisions . Right . Pursue those things Scrolling . What's the solution for that ? The addiction scrolling right ? I say get the no scroll app . And then I also say get a bike . If not , that you know , get a go out to your porch , whatever that looks like . But I'll say no scroll app for sure is an easy start for that .

Speaker 1 29:09

Isolation solution for that strategically reach for help through virtual workshops , study groups , masterminds . Grab a work buddy . Go to a networking event , maybe two per month , with a tangible desire for getting help . Make it tangible . Two or three questions , two or three people , that's it Right . We're not , we're not trying to go everywhere . We're starting out two or three questions , two or three people . Dive deep instead of wide . Go for it . Right .

Speaker 1 29:37

How to beat the distance between when you start and when you see your results . Right , tangibly define what success is for you and use that to create your steps between the time when you begin and the result . This way , you're not looking at air as you try to take steps forward , but your process has actual steps to take . Boom , man , there you go . I hope it helps . I know it was a little bit like I'm getting my own thoughts through it and kind of getting , uh , encouraged and inspired as I go through it myself . I hope this helps , man . I hope this gives some insight .

Inviting Feedback and Interaction

Speaker 1 30:11

Um , as always , if you can , let me know your thoughts . If you , if this sparked any thoughts in your brain , some things that you've gone through or questions that you have , let me know . Shoot us a message on Instagram , shoot us a message on the Apple podcast , whatever it is , let me know . I'd love to hear from you and , if you can , let me know how these episodes have been treating you . Let me know how you enjoy them . Let me know if there's anything you'd like to ask or ask questions about , and I'd love to hear more from you . All right , thank you so much for tuning in . I'll catch you on the next one . Have a good one , bye .