#56: Zebra Striping

Mocktails Or Messy podcast
IG: @mocktailsormessy | TikTok: @mockmess
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Chapters

• 0:00 Introducing Zebra Striping
• 5:25 Deadless Mocktails and Mama Life
• 11:38 Career First Mentality
• 15:35 Mind, Body, Messiness
• 22:07 Playing with Reality
• 28:10 Disconnecting and Living Present

Transcript

Introducing Zebra Striping

Speaker 2 0:04

this is ryan frankovsky, and kelly mzgorski and you're listening to. Okay, how are you feeling today, ryan? I feel like today, it's always like a whirlwind.

Speaker 1 0:19

So how are you doing? I mean, okay, wait, has anyone ever sold you on the zebra striping when you're out drinking? Have you heard of this like zebra striping? Has anyone sold you on that? Um or told you what do you?

Speaker 2 0:34

mean like black and white stripes, like I don't even know what we're talking about here yeah, you would think, but it's actually this serious like term now.

Speaker 1 0:44

It's like buzzing around, it's a thing. You actually alternate your drinks One alcoholic drink and then one non-alcoholic drink. Stripe, you know.

Speaker 2 0:55

No way, because, okay, this, I've actually been doing this lately Because listen.

Speaker 1 1:01

Oh, so you're already doing it.

Speaker 2 1:02

Well, I've been doing that like for a while I think you created this, maybe, and now there's just like a term because you told me about, you know, alternating the drinks. So I still like a spark, like a spicy margarita, when I go out, but I also like waking up and functioning and actually feeling good. So, like I've been doing a lot of zebra-ing now One alcoholic drink and then I would do a mocktail next and then, like you know, if I'm not too full and I want another drink, then I could do another.

Speaker 1 1:36

You know margarita, but you sandwich that like you know, zebra yeah, okay, it's like, you know, it's like the stripes, but like I guess that would make me like a full-time zebra, because I'm not striping, like not, I'm not zebra striping, I'm just like zebraing. Does that even make sense like full stripes?

Speaker 2 1:52

like, you're like, just like a zebra with no stripes oh, that's it.

Speaker 1 1:56

I'm like the dark horse.

Speaker 2 1:58

You're the dark horse, there you go. I don't know you're making yourself sound too cool. I.

Speaker 1 2:03

I mean if only if only. But I've never been, like, you know, a zebra striping in this new phase, because I've been like completely sober, but I was zebra striping with you in Daytona Beach.

Speaker 2 2:13

You were. No, you're truly you're a sober king and, honestly, what makes this work is like we're both on different paths but we support the hell out of each other. And zebra bring is like the middle lane. Um, you know, you still go out, you still have fun.

Speaker 1 2:29

Not that you need alcohol to have fun, um, but you're not like wrecking yourself the next day with just mock or cocktail after cocktail after cocktail right, like I literally say to the bartender like hold the cock, I'm just kidding, I just hold the cock, I'm just kidding, I just hold the liquor hold the liquor, you know.

Speaker 2 2:47

I mean honestly, it's genius.

Speaker 1 2:49

You could call it hydration.

Speaker 2 2:51

You could call it like harm reduction, call it adulting, but you know we're going to call it zebraing.

Speaker 1 2:59

It's mindfooling. It's mindful right Zebra striping it's mindfooling it's mindful, right, it's mindfling.

Speaker 2 3:10

Okay, then you know, message us and tell us, like, how good do you feel the next morning when you try this?

Speaker 1 3:13

okay, zebra strike. I want to know, because we are not going to be drinking water. Let's be honest, like they say, to drink a water between each drink.

Speaker 2 3:19

That just seems like you're going to the bathroom too much yeah oh, no, no, no I remember in college when I first started drinking, like people would be like, okay, have a, have a water between every drink. And yeah, I never did that.

Speaker 1 3:32

Yeah so today we are drinking, we're zebra striping with you and you are having a little bit of wine and also mixing in the deadless mocktail. Deadless is a sinfully bold, zero proof mocktail, non-alcoholic beverage powered with real fruit, adaptogens and botanicals. We have three different flavors here today. We have the bloody berry deadless. We have the evil island deadless this little. Yeah, this looks really cool and then you are gonna try the citrus sinner deadless now let's get a little sinful today with our mocktails.

Speaker 1 4:12

You know, it's just no booze, no bs, just real ingredients like blood, orange, hibiscus, ginger, calming adaptogens. I love the adaptogens because they do kind of give you that little bit of like that relaxation yes, love it.

Speaker 2 4:25

So I'm going to make an example of this zebra ink. Today I have my favorite white wine. It's called starborough, yeah, and then I have the deadless citrus sinner. So we're gonna zebra. I'm gonna zebra my way through here yes, and you're gonna go.

Speaker 1 4:41

No stripes, just vibes uh-huh, just vibes, baby and you know this mocktails are messy.

Speaker 2 4:46

Try it with us or talk about it later in therapy. That was good.

Speaker 1 4:52

She literally came up with that on her own. Damn girl. She's a witty little thing today, aren't you? Or is that every day?

Speaker 2 4:59

Honey, I'm just exhausted. I know I don't even know what's coming out of my mouth, right?

Speaker 1 5:03

now what you need a little caffeine, pick me up. Or maybe you need a little booze or mock.

Deadless Mocktails and Mama Life

Speaker 2 5:08

Listen, I need my kids to sleep. So it's the last week of preschool for my daughter and she is so excited, right? And then my son is going through like a sleep regression. So when kids are going through like a milestone, where they're like learning something new, sometimes they have a sleep regression and they just don't want to sleep. So I have not been getting great sleep.

Speaker 1 5:32

That's crazy. The sleep regression. I don't even know this thing, so you're like the expert mama that does all this research.

Speaker 2 5:37

Definitely not an expert, but I do do research.

Speaker 1 5:40

Yeah, I mean, I can't even imagine so. Like, obviously with that comes you have to be like scrambling around trying to get to school and then also try to make sure nap time is in place or not yeah, we'll go with or not.

Speaker 2 5:54

Right now this kid is not sleeping, but anyways, yeah, to explain myself I don't even know what's coming out of my mouth.

Speaker 1 6:01

Hey, the mama's, no sleep. You just taught me something. You know, who knows, maybe I'll have kids.

Speaker 2 6:06

one day you can relate to your mom friends now.

Speaker 1 6:08

Okay, that's right. Yeah, like I was at this open house recently this weekend and they were all talking about their kids and they were talking about like this, that and the other and I kept like referencing you. I'm like to make sure I fit into the conversation.

Speaker 2 6:27

Yeah, no, oh, my gosh Mom. Friends can be so hard to fit in with.

Speaker 1 6:30

What do you think about the deadless?

Speaker 2 6:32

Okay, so I didn't try it. Let me try it right now.

Speaker 1 6:35

I know she doesn't like to try the thing, she likes to enjoy the like you know.

Speaker 2 6:40

I was going to start.

Speaker 1 6:41

I was going to start with the star girl for the zebra, but I would like to take a sip of this yes.

Speaker 2 6:49

That's really good.

Speaker 1 6:50

Yeah, what does?

Speaker 2 6:50

this remind me of? What does this remind you of?

Speaker 1 6:53

Let me try it reminds me of like something that I wouldn't want to chug. In a way that's like a mocktail.

Speaker 2 7:00

Ooh, I like mine better, I think.

Speaker 1 7:02

Yeah, you know what I like mine better. I think yeah, you know what I like mine better. So this, what would you even call Evil Island?

Speaker 2 7:12

Like that's the flavor. I mean it does feel like if I was like on an island and I made like a little berry juice.

Speaker 1 7:17

Yeah right, it would taste like that I don't know.

Speaker 2 7:18

Is there coconut and like blueberry in there? Maybe I have no idea guys, it's 15 calories.

Speaker 1 7:25

It's vegan blueberry in there, maybe I? I have no idea. Guys, it's 15 calories. It's trying to figure out. These flavors are good performance enhanced.

Speaker 2 7:30

It improves mood, adaptogens and new trukes there's ashwagandha, lion's mane, althea 9, and some of these adaptogens can make me feel a little funny.

Speaker 1 7:46

Oh, I love the funny it comes out.

Speaker 2 7:48

It scares me, I get scared.

Speaker 1 7:49

Oh, like you're a little bit weird, like.

Speaker 2 7:51

I was a little bit scared too. What is this?

Speaker 1 7:52

feeling, oh yeah right it's not addictive, though it doesn't feel addictive.

Speaker 2 7:57

No, I just want it to stop normally.

Speaker 1 7:59

Oh my God, that's so funny. So it's powerful for mama.

Speaker 2 8:02

I'm like, real sensitive towards things Except alcohol I'm not real sensitive to alcohol.

Speaker 1 8:09

No, no, no, no, she's not, she's not. She does not need to be sensitive to that. I am now. Can you imagine if I had a drink right now?

Speaker 2 8:17

I don't want that to happen.

Speaker 1 8:19

I know. I just feel like my tolerance would be so low.

Speaker 2 8:21

Yeah.

Speaker 1 8:25

I like my tolerance would be so low. Yeah, I mean, we used to have a good ass time with the drinks, but I would never.

Speaker 2 8:28

I see how good your life is now and how happy you are, and I would never want that to go away for you.

Speaker 1 8:32

Well, in a pivotal moment I realized recently was whenever we were closing the deal on your new house and I literally left this like event that was supposed to be scheduled for us, like we were going to like these steam, hot springs and steamboat, and it was like no service. The deals were coming in, we had to close and if I was the old me that was buzzed and like a little bit, I'd be like oh, we'll figure it out later tonight, as long as it's in before midnight, right my house would not have sold, yes, and who knows, I might not have gotten the other one that we bought, because you would have been too much of a mess.

Speaker 2 9:08

Uh, yeah, thank god no, he's on his shit now, if you need a real estate agent, call me, call me baby.

Speaker 1 9:16

I even just have, like you know, like all these people reaching out now and I'm like so shocked and so impressed that like they actually trust me with the transaction because, you know, whenever you're kind of somebody that like does want to do like the perfect job, like you really like I don't think of myself as a perfectionist, but when it comes to my job and my career, it definitely is important. Yeah, right.

Speaker 2 9:38

You are when it comes to your career.

Speaker 1 9:39

I've noticed that Well, because you know I don't have kids and like my career is everything. I've noticed that, well, because you know I don't have kids and like my career is everything. And I remember talking about this before, like whenever I was in a relationship years ago and they had this interview for reality show and I was like my career comes first before anything else. And that person that I was dating was like wow, that's kind of shallow. Like you, you don't even think about me first. Like you, you would pick your job over me.

Speaker 2 10:04

I love it. I try to call him sometimes and it's just like forwarded to voicemail and I'm like fuck you I know you're on like a real estate.

Speaker 1 10:11

You're on a real estate call.

Speaker 2 10:13

It's like of course you should take your real estate call.

Speaker 1 10:15

Call me back later yeah, I mean, you know firsthand. Your grandmother and your grandfather were top agents they were always busy and I'm used to that.

Speaker 2 10:24

Like my husband, he was in the military so like I didn't come first. Are you fucking kidding? Me like the deployment came first and like and you followed his ass around. You were a good wife, it's that's how you have to function yes, if you're going to like, survive in society, like I know, I'm number one to like my job and career, is your livelihood, my husband's livelihood. Without that, what do we have?

Speaker 1 10:56

Right, we don't have any money coming in.

Career First Mentality

Speaker 1 10:58

Right so you want to be on the street. I don't know, it's a big topic of discussion nowadays. It's like okay, so wait, where does it get to a point where it's like is it enough? Like money, money, money, money, career, career, career, promotion, promotion, promotion. And it's like it gets to a point where it's like you can have a little bit more freedom. So like if you're like going after, like you know, just like the money, and then it's all like filling voids with material things such as cars, watches, vacations that don't even matter, that you just want to post on social media to show off that you're cool, that's whenever it's not, it like like it doesn't, it's not in a line with your happiness okay, and I I do think you're speaking from experience here with the vacation thing this guy, I swear, used to take a vacation every other week it was terrible.

Speaker 1 11:46

It was so stupid, it was so messy. I would literally be like there were just. I surrounded myself with a lot of people that wanted like a best friend that was fun, that was available, or they, or relationships that wanted like a boyfriend that was like the, the, the party animal that was going to bring. Like you know, I knew how to operate in a way that it's like how am I going to get invited and then how am I also going to provide an amazing experience and companionship, to be able to get invited where it's a lot of things that I couldn't justify on my own. Like I couldn't afford to like travel to all these places if it wasn't for other people being like I want you to come, I don't want to go by myself, or I want you to be there, you're the life of the party, or like you do this or you do that.

Speaker 2 12:39

And it was just like it got to a point where I was like, wait, I'm not really putting myself first and I'm just trying to ride the wave of like what? Well, you definitely were that and still are that fun friend, but I feel like you used to put so much energy into being that fun friend yes, that, literally, if someone was going on vacation, the first person they're gonna think of to take is obviously gonna be him, because, like he's the fun guy, right, I remember that oh yeah, I do and, oh my god, I have to give this lip gloss a shout out.

Speaker 2 12:59

It's the fend, it's fenty skin it is a hydrating, strengthening lip oil is that riri? This is riri's and it's so fucking good. Guys. I used to have like dry, cracked lips and I don't anymore because of this show that pucker there's the pucker that looks so good cute or not, I don't care, I'm showing it.

Speaker 2 13:24

I really like it but you know we're healing both of us. Everybody is all the time if you're putting in the work yes and um. It's not always pretty and self-care sometimes looks like hiding in your car with a bag of chips in silence, or you know. I think on today's episode we should talk about like chaos and how it means like coping and like lifestyle, and let's just call it like mind, body, messiness.

Speaker 1 13:57

Mind, body, messiness. I love that yes, Mind, body and soul, but mind, body and messiness today.

Speaker 2 14:05

Let's talk about this. This maybe will be fun. So like what heals you but kind of has a cost, what heals you but kind of has a cost, like for me, like things that technically help but might like raise eyebrows in a therapist's office. So, for example, my thing is probably like scrolling real estate listings that I can't afford and I like pretend that it's manifestation. Or like deep cleaning the kitchen and silence but like really I'm aggressively ignoring, like my actual to do list. That's crazy.

Speaker 1 14:42

Oh my God, doom scrolling when I wake up. In the morning it's like motivational real estate, but then it's like wait, I'm getting stuck or I'm trying to post something that I need to have them done.

Speaker 2 14:53

Sorry.

Speaker 1 14:54

I'm trying to post something and then it takes way too long because I'm trying to perfect it and like make sure that it has like the proper like hashtags and caption, and then it's like got to have the right adjustments with the filter and light. So that is a big time fuck for me, or time waste, if you will, and I just feel like that is not, not ideal. That's not how I want to get that shit like blocked, like we need to time block ourselves. Yes, right.

Speaker 2 15:19

I'm working on that. I need you to teach me your calendar ways.

Speaker 1 15:22

Maybe we need to have like a little seminar here.

Speaker 2 15:24

I love it. Let's just keep throwing ourselves under the bus for this episode. Yes, yeah.

Speaker 1 15:30

I do like that.

Mind, Body, Messiness

Speaker 2 15:30

You know what are some things that you pretend are self-care but maybe they're not. Like, let's play a game called like lie to yourself louder aka things we've told ourselves count as wellness but are kind of just avoidance.

Speaker 1 15:46

I honestly don't know. I need you to like give me a little like insight on what yours are.

Speaker 2 15:52

For me it's definitely definitely like buying supplements and never taking that like wellness supplements and I'm like, okay, I'm like so healthy and so I'm gonna practice self-care and I buy all this shit, like I rack up a crazy grocery bill at whole foods and then I don't you don't take it or like oh my god, I God, I buy spinach Because I want to be like Healthy in that week or in that moment. And it sits in the back of the fridge until it like.

Speaker 1 16:20

Do you ever blend it in like a Vitamix?

Speaker 2 16:23

No, I just throw it away because it gets slimy.

Speaker 1 16:25

No, no, no, no. Blend that shit and it'll be really good to just like have that.

Speaker 2 16:30

What do you mean?

Speaker 1 16:38

Like, like, have that. What do you mean like?

Speaker 2 16:39

turn it into like so I put it in my protein shakes the spinach, so you mix it with something. Well, you could do that, or you could put water and just like, make it juice.

Speaker 1 16:43

That sounds disgusting. I mean, I'm all about you, totally. Would I like see. This is how I operate. I'm like what makes me feel good is like, okay, I need to buy all the healthy groceries and stuff, but then what happens is if I see like somebody with candy or something or like pastries, then I just ruin all the good healthy eating.

Speaker 2 17:01

Oh my gosh, you should see him when he comes over If I have like brownies or something on the counter.

Speaker 1 17:07

I walked past them this time I'm actually shocked. Well, you know why they look too chocolatey. They didn't have like you. You had vanilla icing the one time, so I love the balance, but these were like chocolate on chocolate.

Speaker 2 17:19

And.

Speaker 1 17:19

I'm not a big like. I don't like heavy, like German chocolate cake. Yeah, it's like way too double chocolate. Like I need to like balance it with like another flavor, icing.

Speaker 2 17:30

Yeah, I'll be honest. I left him alone at my house because we were doing work and I had to go get my daughter and I thought to myself, when I come back, those brownies are going to be gone. You did, I did. Yeah, I guess it was too chocolatey guys, because normally it would have been gone.

Speaker 1 17:45

Well, did you notice that I had two of your protein shakes?

Speaker 2 17:50

Oh my gosh you did. No, I didn't notice that yet. Yes, I'm about to notice. Or oh my gosh, you did no, I didn't notice that yet yes, I, or protein bars, not shakes. I had two of the strawberry, you give me one you know why I thought maybe there was four in there, but there must have been five.

Speaker 1 18:03

So you had two because I noticed there's three left. I had to like refrain myself oh my gosh, okay, no, that's just. I mean, that's my problem even still like whenever I buy healthy food, then I like eat like double the amount sometimes.

Speaker 2 18:15

Well, I feel like your guilty thing is like you'll make a new to do list, but like you never did anything on the last to do list Right, that is so new, I'll just add a new one.

Speaker 1 18:24

And it's so stupid.

Speaker 2 18:28

And I have multiple to do lists and then I'm like, hey, ryan, like never did any of that stuff. I'm on to the next list, so why do you even make a to-do list?

Speaker 1 18:35

I think my brain is overacting. And then it gets like just I. I really struggle with the idea of like taking like add meds like I need to, but then I don't want to. And then I also feel like you know what I've come this far in life like? But then again, maybe, maybe in some ways I could be like a high performer, even more so if I actually took them. I don't know, I just don't want to.

Speaker 1 18:58

I want to be more holistic I get it and I do think that's definitely an adhd trait yeah, like it just moves on to the next thing and then, yeah, it's like, but then it almost dims me. When I did take them, when I was prescribed in college and it was good for studying, but then everything else in my life, I was like it does that to some people yeah what is like in another era, something that you'd totally be institutionalized for for doing.

Speaker 2 19:24

Like this is the part where we admit our most chaotic coping behaviors chaotic coping behaviors.

Speaker 1 19:32

I mean maybe sex with the boy. Is that chaotic? Is that I mean coping?

Speaker 2 19:38

based on what I've heard, which I'm sure is private, it does sound pretty chaotic I mean, he could barely walk when he walked into this. Oh my god, you were like walking all bent over and you were limping.

Speaker 1 19:53

Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. Okay, she's bowling, she's pulling your leg.

Speaker 2 19:58

I'm not she's pulling my leg. That's not true. I'm sorry to say I'm not oh.

Speaker 1 20:04

God, they're going to think I'm a big old power.

Speaker 2 20:15

Oh, I got one for you, so you will tell someone that you're gonna call them back oh yeah, you'll say, I'll call you right back, and then you disappear for like six to eight business days.

Speaker 1 20:20

Oh, that's not okay, that's unacceptable, it's a little better now.

Speaker 2 20:23

Maybe it's like a like a few days now, but like waiting by the phone fuck, I am an asshole, or maybe just a mess you're a mess, you're messy. That's why this is mocktails are messy exactly.

Speaker 1 20:35

messy behavior does not stop with sobriety, right? I realized when I was joking recently about like just saying like, oh, my parents are getting divorced, like I was just like fucking with them because I'm like it's so outlandish. But then it's like I don, I don't know why I said it. I think I was just like, come on, like this person is so gullible and they've known me for years and I'm like it was just like way out of left field. I think like why do I do that? Like I think I'm just like desperately wanting to still do acting. So I was like going doubling down in on this like long story. But then if you, if you knew me like you do, you would hear this story about them getting divorced. You'd be like, okay, I'm going to go along with it or I'm not going to buy it. I'm going to just be like fuck you. I'm moving on to the same and the next.

Speaker 2 21:25

I just like nod my head and smile. Yeah, I know when you're not okay, so you could tell yeah. So that's why I don't get upset, because I, I mean, I think you know, I can tell I think you do, but you just love, you love like acting and you'd like to keep going.

Speaker 1 21:41

I feel like it's and you, you play with me I know what you're doing.

Speaker 2 21:44

You're practicing you're practicing, you're perfecting your skills, you're sharpening your knife and I love going along with it because I love to support you knife.

Speaker 1 21:53

That's it. It's fun for us it's fun I mean maybe it's not the most.

Playing with Reality

Speaker 2 21:58

Um, it's not fun for people that are super gullible actually if you're able to pick up on like sarcasm and stuff like an ounce of like, like reality, like picking up on sarcasm, like how do you? Because I know you get in trouble sometimes because people are like wait, that wasn't true what he said and I'm like no, like couldn't you tell that he was like totally fucking with us?

Speaker 2 22:22

Yeah, I know I just I get confused that like you know that people don't pick up on that, but you guys tell us like do you think it's insincere or disingenuine to be like making up stories?

Speaker 1 22:36

Yes, I want to know. Comment below Do you think it is insincere or disingenuous to be constantly making up stories and playing this bullshit game Like I feel like it's in my DNA, my dad does it and then my mother's father does it.

Speaker 2 22:52

Yeah, I think it's fun.

Speaker 1 22:53

It's fun.

Speaker 2 22:54

I think it's fun.

Speaker 1 22:55

But I also get like you wouldn't get the humor. If that's just not your cup of tea, then we probably are not meant to be friends.

Speaker 2 23:03

Yeah, probably. Right, yeah, we're really embracing the hate now.

Speaker 1 23:11

We are. I think it's a lot to do with like you're.

Speaker 2 23:15

one person from LA said that we were mean girls, and so I tried so hard for a while to not be a mean girl.

Speaker 1 23:22

Yes.

Speaker 2 23:23

But I'm not a mean girl, by the way, I'm just honest. And if you don't like honesty. You're not going to like me.

Speaker 1 23:31

I know and honest to God, it's not about being making somebody like bad, it's just about like hey, like you don't want to sugarcoat it because you want solutions. You want to not talk in circles about problems like let's just cut the like we said before, like we're filtrating or we're getting the brita of life.

Speaker 2 23:57

we're filtering out the noise and the bullshit yes, yes ryan, thank you for playing with me, you know whatever your coping flavor is this week, whether it's leafy greens going to waste or scrolling through zillow at midnight, you're still doing your best and we support you yes, we do.

Speaker 1 24:19

Let's go. Let's fucking go, guys. Take on this new chapter, this new quarter. We need to really just like pride ourselves in, like doing the best that we can and like going into the summer and feeling great, enjoying the outdoors. You know, really just like they say, it's like so cheesy, but like just smelling the roses and like now I'm feeling so much more peaceful and I don't want to say it's the relationship, but it is in a way that like I've been going, going, going and now I'm actually like slowing down at night and being like, hey, I'm in like this present mode of like zen, not even listening to music, not listening to the tv, just like hanging out, maybe playing a little yahtzee, playing a little card game here and there it's sometimes nice to go back on that, have you?

Speaker 1 25:07

done that. We have you and your boyf. The boyf and me are playing games at night.

Speaker 2 25:12

That is so cute.

Speaker 1 25:13

I mean on the weekend, not like the weeknights.

Speaker 2 25:15

Hey, those games that no one plays anymore. I feel like that kept our grandparents sharp, yes I feel like that kept our grandparents sharp. Yes, like my grandma always had a deck of cards on her table and sometimes, when I'd stop by to visit, they'd be playing cards.

Speaker 1 25:31

And there's something really rewarding about doing stuff that doesn't involve technology.

Speaker 2 25:37

I love it. Sometimes it's just too like my brain is exhausted. So I'm like gosh, the last thing I want to do is play a game of cards, uh-huh yeah, yeah, your brain, yeah, I think it's good to keep well, and it keeps you challenging your brain you juice, your juices flowing it keeps your juices flowing yeah, it keeps.

Speaker 2 25:56

It makes your brain stronger than I think oh yeah I mean, and we need as much as we can, right, right we got to push through the what the laziness of like just saying I don't want to play a game, I'd rather just turn on the tv or scroll, I know.

Speaker 1 26:11

So I love that you're playing cards maybe we should turn our phones off at certain point and like just kind of connect with each other I've tried.

Speaker 2 26:20

So what I've done before is actually unplugged my like wi-fi in the house, oh, and I felt like the house was calmer and like it's almost like when it's on, there's like not a sound buzz but like there's a buzzing in the air yeah, from like you can feel it so I don't know. The suggestion is, if you really want a good night's sleep, just unplug the whole fucking wi-fi wow, I'm just like so scared that I'm gonna miss a ping or miss an email.

Speaker 1 26:49

But then I mean there is that mentality that like, hey, you, you get up early enough, you get to the office early enough, you can connect there, but home should be a little bit more of a sanctuary. I did have a meeting today that was like, yes, we might work seven days a week, but you need to make the time like whether it's like those weekdays, afternoons that are not busy on the weekends to just really fully disconnect and be with your family. We are so grateful to be able to like continue this podcast with you. I think we've remembered. Can you go and say what you were gonna say?

Speaker 2 27:28

oh, I didn't have anything to say.

Speaker 1 27:30

Um, I can give a story time oh yeah, I want to hear your stories okay sure so tell me the goods this sometimes.

Speaker 2 27:39

you know we have to like write down ideas, right? Oh yeah, because doing an episode just us, we could talk about bullshit that you guys don't want to hear.

Speaker 1 27:48

Well, maybe they do and you're just cognizant of like a larger viewership is not going to want to hear it.

Disconnecting and Living Present

Speaker 2 27:55

Possibly. So I have a story come to mind. I'm starting to like feel good about myself, right. So that's what triggered this story. So this was like 13 years ago. I was maybe 21, 22, um, and I was walking down the stairs at some nice little weekend getaway, cute little rental, cold weather, you know, cozy cabin, vibe and I'm feeling myself okay and I've got my tight jeans on my tight top, my hair is like doing the most and I'm walking like I know I look good, right, you know how to do that walk.

Speaker 2 28:36

You want that walk. Someone who always has something to say goes. You don't always have to wear everything so tight, you know, and in that moment I didn't say anything out loud, but in my head I was screaming yes the f I do. Right, I still wear whatever the hell I want. And I did then and I'll keep doing it.

Speaker 2 29:00

Every time I put something on that makes me feel like me, because I'm never going to look exactly like this again. I'm never going to look this good again. And that's not sad, it's real, it's hot. And I'm not dressing for silent approval for anyone you know perched on the sidelines. I'm dressing for a girl who knows she's got it. You know all of you. You all have it too. You all got it. So the next time someone tries to humble you about what you're wearing, just smile and say, yes, the F, I do. That's my story for the day. Those are my thoughts. I think I've always been kind of crucified a bit for, and today I should have worn something low cut today to really go with the vibes. Maybe I should just take my shirt off. Yes, please.

Speaker 2 29:54

But it's like I feel like I have a large chest so I could wear something that, like I don't know, a woman with a smaller chest yeah could wear and it would look so different on me, right, and I would be called like a slut sometimes or like a skank. And it's like, dude, you're wearing the same shirt, you just have no tits. My tits are just big. Why can't I wear the same shit as you? And I used to feel I don't know bad about it, like oh, maybe I am a slut, maybe I'm trying to show off my tits.

Speaker 1 30:27

But now I realize, like no, I'm going to fucking be me, I'm going to show off my assets exactly whether you want to call it that or not, I mean I know some people love the small titty committee, and I mean people love the small titty committee, and I mean, I love the small titty committee Me too, but this is who I am, this is me. Yeah, allow you to be you, and.

Speaker 2 30:46

I'm going to like show it off.

Speaker 1 30:48

A fucking man. I think that they are beautiful. You are beautiful. Let's go, let's empower.

Speaker 2 30:53

All titties are beautiful.

Speaker 1 30:54

Yeah, let's empower each other to just show and don't show it off if you don't and we're not going to discriminate either way and I think in some ways, like I, work hard for you know this physique.

Speaker 2 31:07

So I want to show it off. Yes, the fuck you do.

Speaker 1 31:09

And, like you know, that's kind of a similar concept. But I think, with women empowerment, we need to embrace women allowed to do whatever the F they want, because they will not say about a man who's shirtless like they will about a female who's wearing something with cutouts and like being, you know, provocative in the boardroom or whatever it may be. It's just like very frustrating. The double standard is still in today's society at 2025 and we need to embrace. What you wear is up to you, nobody else amen to that baby let's go.

Speaker 1 31:43

That's why we are besties honey, and I mean I do love watching you like get this like whole, like high end, like you know beautiful, like sexy thing, like that's your style it is, you know it is yeah, show it off, baby, baby.

Speaker 2 32:00

Cheers to that. Okay, thank you for listening to. Mocktails are Messy.

Speaker 1 32:03

This is Ryan Frankofsky and my girl.

Speaker 2 32:06

Kelly Misgorski. It was good to see you guys today. Cheers, cheers.