Confronting Betrayal part 2: Behind Closed Doors: A Marriage Betrayal

We want to hear from you,  Introduce yourself the way you would like it aired, where your calling from State and City is fine as well as which Season, Podcast title and episode. Call the Studio at 212-718-0330 and leave your comments

Call the studio to respond 212-718-0330

Transcript

Introduction to Big T's Betrayal

Speaker 1 0:12

All right, this is your pod host, folks, og, goat, and we're back with Big T out of upstate New York and we want to continue on with this betrayal of the wife. To give you a little recap, guys, Big T has been supporting the family, taking care of the wife, finance the house, cars for the wife, everything, and the wife just went off on her own. Like you know, this just wasn't enough. She got herself a little marketing gig on the side where she's running her own business, got a few connections and next thing you know the rest is history. But we'll let Tom tell you and catch you up to speed and then we'll continue on from there.

Uncovering the Affair with Her Boss

Speaker 2 1:12

So, big T, tell us what's going on since the last time we met and bring us up to speed real quick, because you know we only have, we're limited on time yeah, well, pretty much there's been a bunch of this, last time unacceptable and unforgivable behavior that's transpired and as a result of that, it's's taken a toll on my family and you know, it's just been a trying time. It was like you know, regardless of the fact of forgiving and everything else, it just seems like she has more interest in this other person who she's with, who't even afford to, you know, take care of us, her boss from work, but you know he has an establishment which is fairly new and he's married at that, and support him while I'm supporting my wife. You know what I'm saying. So it's like you got two peas in a pod who can't do it on their own by themselves. They still need somebody to support, but they're playing a very dangerous game, you know.

Speaker 1 2:24

Right. So you're saying he's married also her boss Right, with four kids, with four kids and he's supporting his family and then messing with your wife, right? Or someone is supporting him and he's supporting his family and then messing with your wife Right, or someone is supporting him and he's messing with him.

Speaker 2 2:40

His wife is help supporting him.

Speaker 1 2:44

Wow, yeah, so his wife is helping to support him while he run a business. Meanwhile he's chasing. Your wife Is that right, right.

Speaker 2 2:57

Well, they're kind of chasing each other.

Speaker 1 2:59

Oh, so your wife is chasing him and he's chasing your wife, right? So let me ask you now have they actually gotten together and done anything yet, or they're just, you know, playing this little touch and go game?

Speaker 2 3:19

Yeah, no, they actually got together and done something in like December of 24.

Speaker 1 3:30

December of 24. Now, if I have this correctly, you spoke to your wife about this and she eventually copped to the fact that she done something. Is that right? That's correct, okay. So now, after she copped to the fact that she's done it with her boss, she promised you, if I have this correctly, that it's not going to happen again, or she said no more. And then what happened?

Speaker 2 3:59

yeah, that they got it, you know she, she spoke to him or whatever, and that you know, moving forward, none of this would have made a mistake. And then, um, you know I was just, I didn't turn a blind eye to it, but you know, I had, I have clothes and I'm just watching the situation clearly. And then I seen, like after that time, where she was sleeping with him. Two weeks later I saw her kissing him in the parking lot wow, now wait, wait, wait.

Speaker 1 4:27

How did you see her kissing him in the parking lot?

Speaker 2 4:32

oh, because um, on the car it has cameras from factory and I was able to enable the camera and then saw them kissing in the parking lot. So I just screen recorded.

Speaker 1 4:44

Wow, wow, now has she seen these cameras.

Caught on Camera: Kisses in the Parking Lot

Speaker 2 4:51

She's seen them, but they're part of the car, so has she seen the footage from the cameras is what I meant to say I showed her and then she tried to play it off like, oh, we just said goodbye and I was like five times oh, so there was five kisses going on yeah, and like when he tried to turn around and leave, like she grabbed his arm and like kind of like spun him around in her direction, like don't go yet, man, again, you know and this is wow.

Speaker 1 5:27

This is after they've already been caught. She's admitted to it. She promised that she wasn't going to do it again, but now you catch him again. After what's the distance in time from the time she said she wasn't going to do it again until the time that you caught it now with the cameras on her vehicle?

Speaker 2 5:41

It was two weeks after that, wow. So obviously it's more than meets the eye with that. The feelings that's involved, you know it's more intense than what I even thought. You know because you know it's just, it's just too frequent. You know what I'm saying and you know just recently, when was it? Last March? Yeah, last week, you know, I had activated the cameras again and then it showed him they was talking in the back of the car and then he came up to her and gave her like a kiss on the cheek, but she didn't even move.

Speaker 2 6:19

She didn't do anything. And in most cases, any woman with common sense or some kind of empathy, knowing that you did something wrong or cheated on your husband, you would try to show your good foot forward. You know like, I'm not doing this, no more. Look, you got to trust me. She would have moved back or been like nah, you know it's good or whatever, but she just stood there and let him kiss her. And then, when I saw that and questioned her about it, she was like but I'm not doing anything wrong and I'm like of course you are. This is a person who previously fucked you, you kissed him and you still like around him and you keep telling me you're not doing that wrong.

Speaker 1 7:04

Wow wow.

Speaker 2 7:05

Now let me ask you. You said he's married. Do you think his wife has any idea what's going on? Absolutely not, and if I told her she would, um, his wife would, like I don't know, probably end up putting the beats on my wife. You know, know what I mean? Just on GP alone. Right right, your wife still works with him after all this.

Speaker 2 7:23

Well, she's not working in the job, she's doing like marketing for him. So the marketing she does it doesn't require her to be there, but the fact is is that she's still involved some way with that establishment. So since he owns that establishment, he's involved with him.

Speaker 1 7:38

So why is she no longer working with him anymore?

Speaker 2 7:44

Because the rest of the what you call it that's what she likes to do. He likes that marketing stuff and she likes that environment that she's in.

Speaker 1 7:53

Oh, so she chose to pull out of the job or the position that she had with him to do marketing and not what she was doing before, because, if I have this correctly, before she was like a manager or hostess or something of the company right, she was a manager of the company, right.

Still Working Together Despite Everything

Speaker 2 8:16

What happened was it's not that she pulled out, it's that his wife had put pressure on him to let her go. That's why she pulled out. It's not she pulled out because she wanted to.

Speaker 1 8:27

Why did the wife put pressure on him?

Speaker 2 8:30

Because his daughter was working there. And then he had her fire the daughter, when he should have did it, but he put her to do his dirty work. And then, when the wife found out about it, the daughter went to the mother crying like, oh you know, she fired me, she did this and blah, blah and all of this other shit. And then, you know, the wife had to talk with her. It was like you know, like you don't cross family, you got to go.

Speaker 1 8:56

Unbelievable, unbelievable. So now she fired her boss who owns the restaurant. She fired her boss's daughter and he got his wife got tight turned around and fired her, but she's still working with him. And did the wife get suspicious at all by her just firing the daughter, knowing that that's his daughter? Did the wife?

Speaker 2 9:27

She got suspicious because some of the staff members had said that you know they see him drinking wine together and all of this other shit you know by the bar. Right.

Speaker 1 9:36

Wow, and so now moving forward. Okay, so she's doing marketing. So she kind of like pulled herself out of the environment, which gives her, I would presume, less time to be with him, right, and more time to work on the business in the marketing aspect. Right, is that working? Is, are they staying apart, or that's not working either.

Speaker 2 10:12

Well, you know, she still goes there from time to time because the marketing, if she's got to do, she's going to update stuff, you know, on the social media, because that's all the stuff that she controls. You know she's the one doing all of that, right? But you know, the other day this was like around God's day, she, you know, I had my device or whatever in the vehicle and then I heard them, like you know, they was eating sushi in the car, as they was eating sushi in the car or whatever, like I heard, like moans you know what I'm saying Like mmm, mmm, you know stuff like that, no, so it's just like at this point, I just think it's a wrap. You know what I'm saying Because you know.

Speaker 1 11:09

That's the thing Once again how long have you guys been married?

Speaker 2 11:13

For 19 years.

Speaker 1 11:15

You've been married for 19 years and you have how many children together? Two. And how old is your oldest? 18. And your youngest Three. Wow, so this kind of went sour basically within the past three years.

Speaker 2 11:32

Right.

Speaker 1 11:33

And how long she's been with this boss.

Speaker 2 11:39

Well, they've been working together for like about a year now.

Speaker 1 11:43

So it actually went sour within the past two years. Now, what do you plan to do at this point? Do you want to rekindle your marriage? Do you want to let her go?

Speaker 2 11:55

It sounds like she's gone already.

Speaker 1 11:57

I mean, so what do you want to do at this point? Because I mean, I feel you're hanging on to nothing. And she's still living with you, right, Yep? So what do you want to do at this point? What do you think is your best move? Because obviously you haven't thrown her out and you're doing a lot of detective work here and you're finding out a lot of stuff, so I'm presuming that you still have a lot of feelings for her.

Speaker 2 12:30

Well, I do. But you know, like with the stuff that I've uncovered or whatever, like that, it kind of makes the feelings go void, you know, because you can't love somebody that don't love you. You know, that's just stupid that's a good point, you know what I'm saying.

Building a Strong Case for Divorce

Speaker 2 12:46

At that point, when you see the situation clearly, you kind of make your determination to the situation clearly. You kind of make your determination to push that or leave that and, being that the fact that I tried to push that and have her do better, she didn't do so, so now you got to leave that. You got to be firm on what. You leave that because you can't let feelings complicate the situation.

Speaker 1 13:10

Yeah, excellent, very well put. So the last issue that you've had is that she was eating sushi with him in the car and you're hearing these moaning and groaning sounds in the background, and this was around Valentine's Day. So far, so good. Yep, well, is it possible? Maybe it could have been a love song that was playing in the background, or something.

Speaker 2 13:43

Absolutely not. I mean even sushi. You know the whole duration of the time well, 80% of it, you know. You just don't eat sushi and go mmm, like I mean it's not that fucking good, you know.

Speaker 1 14:01

Sushi's not that good, huh no.

Speaker 2 14:06

Unless somebody's eating her sushi, and that's how she's acting. You know that's when you get that, mmm that's where the mmm come in.

Speaker 1 14:18

Huh, exactly, wow. And so, moving forward, what do you think would be your best move at this point? What's going to be? Are you going to continue to monitor and build a case on this, or you're just about done? We got about three minutes left. What is your next move from this point?

Speaker 2 14:43

Well, I figured at this point here I think she's pretty much done with this marriage and I'm pretty much done with the fucking abuse and I just think that it's just fair enough to say, because she's so comfortable, to get her out of that comfort zone, divorce her ass, and then I'll be able to move forward strategically, meaning like things for the kids and everything else, because love don't live here anymore.

Speaker 2 15:12

You know what I mean. She's with her continued behavior, after you know, giving her signs and telling her what she's done wrong and give her the option to change herself and being at the fact that she didn't. It shows that you obviously like what you're doing. So if you like it that much, you like it, I love it, keep on. You know what I'm saying. You like it, I love it, keep on. You know what I'm saying. But there's a cost to it. There's definitely a cost. You know what I'm saying. And her comfortability is just. You know, with me here paying everything and doing all of what I'm doing. You know what I'm saying. It's just. You know. There's just no help. There's just no help. There's no contribute. You know she's not contributing to anything. You're just comfortable. You're just here, like you know.

Speaker 1 15:53

Yeah.

Always Love Yourself First

Speaker 2 15:55

So you know it's just time to check out. I mean, I think she checked out a while ago, but now that you know I finally came to grips with that, now it's time for me to just check out. Right, right, you know you can't just remain in some just for the fact that you know you love a person, or love them, or whatever the case is, or even just for the kids. You can't sit there and let yourself be susceptible to, you know, like abuse, cause that's a different form of abuse. It ain't like beating your ass, but it's just a different form of abuse.

Speaker 2 16:26

And when they go on like you're doing the things that they doing, it shows clearly and presently they have no respect for you as a person right right so at that point you know what I'm saying I mean I don't need, I don't you know, I don't need no receipt to take me back to the store. You know what I mean. Like if this is how you feel and you show me you don't have no respect by what you're doing and on top of that, you're not even respecting your kids because you're doing shit and you got a family. You know what I'm saying. You gotta hold for the highest standards. You got kids. I wouldn't want my daughter growing up like that and thinking it's okay to, when she gets married, to cheat on her husband because mommy did it right kids emulate.

Speaker 2 17:15

mother is the face of God to minds of all children, and they're going to tend to do whatever their mother does or whatever their father does.

Speaker 1 17:25

That's true. I hear the daughter. That's your daughter, right? Yep, yeah, I hear your daughter in the background. So you're currently, as we speak, you're taking care of the child. Where is she? Is she anywhere around?

Speaker 2 17:38

She had a meeting to go to Okay.

Speaker 1 17:46

She's with the boss now.

Speaker 2 17:49

Nah, she's with other co-workers or whatever different business she got, oh okay.

Speaker 1 17:55

So listen, I really appreciate you coming back on and bringing us up to date. I'm sure the audience is going to be amazed at what just went down, and they've been waiting patiently to hear the details of how this is going.

Speaker 2 18:16

Absolutely, you know. It's just a thing they could always just keep in mind Always love yourself first.

Speaker 1 18:22

Right.

Speaker 2 18:24

And everything else will fall into place, because then you'll have a clear mind where you can assess the situation clearly and know that the way you're moving, it's 100% without changing direction, because you already know what you're dealing with. You just got to know how to accept it and make what's happening a reality in both your eyes and that person's eyes. Because you know what I've learned. You know what I've learned when you're with a person and married to that person. And if they give you unforgivable behavior like that, like cheating and all of that other stuff, and if you say you know what, fuck you and da-da-da-da-da, I'm not going to deal with this shit, no more, I'm leaving. And then your ass, don't leave.

Speaker 2 19:09

They could do that shit again because you didn't leave the first time after some major shit. So they're going to keep going some major shit. So they're going to keep going, right, you know what I'm saying. And the more they keep going, then you don't show them what the fuck they're really dealing with. Think it's a game, because they're going to be like he ain't going to go nowhere, he's just going to get mad, blow up shit. He's still going to be here, still paying the shit. I'm still going to be here doing my shit. Love yourself.

Speaker 1 19:43

Right, right, wow, we're going to check back with you in a couple of weeks. Big T, I really once again appreciate you coming in and bringing us up to date. This is the end of this episode, though, and look forward. We should have it uploaded and you should be live in a day or two. Once again, keep your eye on those comments and let's see what the audience has to say. Thanks again, big T, for coming in. This is what Part of the Game, is that? And I'm your host, og Go, and we're out, thank you.