Transacting Value Podcast
Looking for ways to reinvigorate your self-worth or help instill it in others? You're in the right place. Transacting Value Podcast is a weekly, episodic, conversation-styled podcast that instigates self-worth through personal values. We talk about the impacts of personal values on themes like job satisfaction, mitigating burnout, establishing healthy boundaries, enhancing self-worth, and deepening interpersonal relationships.
This is a podcast about increasing satisfaction in life and your pursuit of happiness, increasing mental resilience, and how to actually build awareness around what your values can do for you as you grow through life.
As a divorced Marine with combat and humanitarian deployments, and a long-distanced parent, I've fought my own demons and talked through cultures around the world about their strategies for rebuilding self-worth or shaping perspective. As a 3d Degree Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do and a lifelong martial artist, I have studied philosophy, psychology, history, and humanities to find comprehensive insights to help all of our Ambassadors on the show add value for you, worthy of your time.
Ready to go from perceived victim to self-induced victor? New episodes drop every Monday 9 AM EST on our website https://www.TransactingValuePodcast.com, and everywhere your favorite podcasts are streamed. Check out Transacting Value by searching "Transacting Value Podcast", on Facebook, LinkedIn or YouTube.
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Transacting Value Podcast
Resilience in Action: Turning Trauma into Triumph with Ann Marie Thrives
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When life knocks you down, what makes the difference between staying down and rising stronger? Ann Marie Thrives shares a masterclass in resilience, shaped by her extraordinary journey from childhood immigration to America, a devastating car accident that left her temporarily paralyzed, multiple life-threatening accidents, breast cancer, and the loss of eighteen loved ones in just seventeen months. Rather than succumbing to fear, Ann Marie cultivated "mental agility," using visualization, gratitude, and self-care to rewire her brain and reclaim her life. Her powerful insights reveal that resilience isn't just about survival—it's about transforming trauma into growth, agency, and opportunity. "We're never really backed into a corner," she says, "because there's always a way out," offering practical wisdom for navigating life's unexpected turns with strength and hope.
Visit wethriveatlife.com to discover Ann Marie's books and free resources designed to help you navigate your own pivotal moments with courage and hope.
(11:12) https://togetherweserved.com/
(39:55) https://porthouse.kw.com/
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The views expressed in this podcast are solely those of the podcast host and guest and do not necessarily represent those of our distribution partners, supporting business relationships or supported audience. Welcome to Transacting Value, where we talk about practical applications for instigating self-worth when dealing with each other and even within ourselves, where we foster a podcast listening experience that lets you hear the power of a value system for managing burnout, establishing boundaries, fostering community and finding identity. My name is Josh Porthouse, I'm your host and we are redefining sovereignty of character. This is why values still hold value. This is Transacting Value.
Ann Marie Thrives:It just felt like I was always going three steps forward and two steps back, and after a while, if you don't have the proper values and the proper foundation and a good belief system or hope or faith or love, you know you don't get through.
Josh Porthouse:Today on Transacting Value how to pivot when you need to. How can traveling and immigrating to a new country or even a new culture help to navigate uncharted life circumstances, and what role do those experiences have on our own self-worth for lasting, life-transforming habits? Those experiences have on our own self-worth for lasting, life-transforming habits. Alongside human behavior specialist and entrepreneur coach, anne-marie Thrives, we're getting unstuck through value systems that resonate inside and out. I'm Josh Porthouse, I'm your host and from SDYT Media, this is Transacting Value. Anne-marie, how are you doing?
Ann Marie Thrives:Great Thanks for having me.
Josh Porthouse:It's great to meet you Absolutely. Oh, you as well. You've got such a wild story. It's hard to believe that you're one person of all the things you've been through, and I want to hit as much of it as we can, but I think the smoothest way to do this is to let you open us up. So just take a couple minutes before me. You know who are you, where are you from, those kinds of things, but what kinds of things in life are shaping your perspective now? Who are you?
Ann Marie Thrives:So my name is Ann Marie and I was born in in Italy, and we immigrated here when I was seven and you know it was really tough when we got here because everything was different, you know the food, the people, the environment. I lived in a very coastal town, right on the water, and we weren't landlocked but we were, way you know, five minutes from the ocean versus 25 minutes from the ocean, um, geez. I just remember one time when I was little you know how Italians sometimes they take they'll do like a little siesta in the afternoon and I remember um grabbing a bag, you know, like one of those bags that you put, uh, groceries in the plastic bags, one of those bags that you put groceries in the plastic bags. And it was like two o'clock in the afternoon. I put a knife in there, put on my jellies and walked down to the ocean, started cutting up the sea urchins on the rocks and I just sat there with my lemon and I ate them. And I went back home and nobody even knew I was gone.
Josh Porthouse:Oh wow, that's how close to the ocean.
Ann Marie Thrives:We were. Anyway, I don't know why that came up, but different days now and just having to be in school and not knowing anything, sitting in the back of the classroom, like I would be in the classroom as part of the group during parts of the day and then other parts of the day still in the classroom, but in the back, um, being uh, tutored with flashcards, and so, um, you know, when kids don't understand things or we don't understand things, you know there was a lot of bullying going on because obviously my parents don't speak the language either. Then, when they did, they had this wicked accent, you know, and um, and then the whole culture being different, you know, we didn't celebrate the same holidays that that we did here and um, Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays now, and, uh, and so we, we didn't have that, so trying to be like everybody else and making a Turkey and pumpkin pie and stuff like that, you know um but just generally not fitting in because we were just so different, but trying to fit in at the same time.
Ann Marie Thrives:So, you know, it's just all of these. So then you go from one school to another, to another, and it's just constantly trying to find the people that you know. Water finds its own level, just finding the people, and for me it was one and two. You know, and, and that's it. I, I, those are, those were my buddies for life. Um one of them passed away um a few years ago and, um, you know it's, it's just as you go through life. People are there, then they're not, and you have to have those pivots.
Ann Marie Thrives:Um then, you know, then they're not and you have to have those pivots. And you know, in my early 20s I got into a very bad accident. I just finished, I got my degree in business administration and management and I, you know, I just got this new job I'd been a temp and they were going to, you know, take me on full time, my insurance and everything, all my benefits kicked in October 1st and October 20th slam. I am paralyzed for quite some time, have a traumatic brain injury, have to learn how to talk, how to, you know, just live life again. But the neat thing was cause I like to look at the silver lining through everything was, you know, having that insurance that was way better than what I had before. I was able to be in a private room because sometimes, when you know, having that insurance, that was way better than what I had before. I was able to be in a private room because sometimes, when you know when you're in that amount of pain or you have a brain injury, for me it was a lot of headaches, migraine, not being able to handle noise and sensory things around me, and so I was able to be put in a private room as part of my insurance. So those are the things I kind of look at.
Ann Marie Thrives:You know, a few years later got back on my feet and it happened again. I think somebody ran a stop sign or something and so different parts got injured and just kind of moving through life, you know, taking care of my dad, having my friend that I spoke of her name was Chris, she was a physician's assistant and while he was here with the disease that he had, it was like having a 24 seven nurse because she, she had hurt her elbow and was convalescing and so she, her sleep pattern pattern was a little crazy, so I had her around the whole time and then my dad passed and a couple months later I got diagnosed with breast cancer. So, um, you know, yeah, I actually was on a podcast because somebody had heard about what. You know, what I've been through life. Yeah, it was.
Ann Marie Thrives:You can't make this shit, I T up. She's like I think you're my gal, I know and and so, but I I just look at them, at things that that happened for me. You know, instead of things that happened to me, there were their periods of anger and you know, like, where's God in my pain? Where's God period?
Ann Marie Thrives:you know, just going through those emotions because it just felt like I was always going three steps forward and two steps back and after a while, if you don't have the proper values and the proper foundation and a good belief system or hope, or faith or love, you know you don't get through.
Ann Marie Thrives:And. I feel like those were the things that got me through, those values that got instilled in me when I was little. Sometimes they were distorted, but, you know, as you grow in life you start to grasp onto the things that matter and it helps you to live a fuller life. And I, through all of these things, wanted to teach other people how to. You know, go through these. It's not the end of the world. Go through these. It's not the end of the world, even through death. You know, having lost I think one year we lost seven, no, 18 people in 17 months, including my father, his brother, you know just a lot of key people my friend Chris, who was the physician's assistant, and my high school buddy, yeah, so it's like all of these key people that you know you go to for life's help are now gone and they're not there anymore. And then, with COVID, I noticed even for myself, a lot of people were had to pivot. Whether they wanted to or not, you know they had to they found themselves in a different position.
Ann Marie Thrives:Um, maybe their police position was eliminated, maybe they lost people that they cared for? Um, and just the whole crisis in general, I think, left a lot of people stuck and unable to to really move, just out of fear. Um, you know, because none of us knew what was going to happen or or how things were going to turn out, and we had to turn to other things and maybe try to trust other things that we normally wouldn't trust before. It's like for a lot of people, being online is a big deal, you know. So, learning, technologies and community I think there's a lot of controversial stuff that goes with COVID, but I, you know, again, I'm always looking for that silver lining.
Ann Marie Thrives:So I'm looking at the fact that, you know, maybe your grandmother couldn't talk to you before, but now she, you know, just talk to her, but now you could talk to her and see her because you know she figured out how to get on Zoom or something you know. So I like to help people that have been through you know, big, figured out how to get on zoom or something you know, um.
Ann Marie Thrives:so I like to help people that have been through, you know, big traumas, big shifts in life. You know, constant. I feel that there's there's a certain mindset that we need to have to go through life, you know, like a thriving mindset that no matter what happens, I'm going to be okay, and to have that hope. And when you don't have it, you don't have that mental agility to. You know, kind of be like Gumby and just bend, you know, so that you can do the things you need to do to get out of that place.
Ann Marie Thrives:Like when I got into my accident, it was like, all right, this is where I am right now. Where do I want to be? How am I going to get there? What steps do I want to be? How am I going to get there? What steps do I need to take to get there? And so throughout my life I feel like I've been asking myself the same questions as things happen, and so I want to be able to help people to. You know, if they're in that spot or they can't figure out, you know, maybe you just got divorced, maybe you lost your husband or significant other or whatever, or your job is gone now and you have to reinvent. So those are the things that I like to help people with. It's just kind of jumping over that hurdle that it's not as bad as it looks, is there?
Ann Marie Thrives:going to be work. Yeah. Is it going to hurt? Yeah, because you have to grow. Anytime you grow, there's growing pains, but it's not impossible.
Josh Porthouse:Alrighty, folks sit tight, We'll be right back on Transacting Value.
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Ann Marie Thrives:Is there going to be work? Yeah. Is it going to hurt? Yeah, because you have to grow. Anytime you grow, you know there's growing pains, but it's not impossible.
Josh Porthouse:Yeah, absolutely not. And the interesting thing you said well, one of the interesting things you said you know about three steps forward and two steps back is it's always still one step forward. So you know how you manage that, how you handle it may not be at a pace you prefer, but it's a pace nonetheless. That's moving forward and that counts for a lot. But the hope that you brought up as well. I think there's only one way to instigate purpose and I think it has to be grounded in hope, because without that it really doesn't matter the good you could do, because you don't see it or you don't see it that way, and that changes a lot of things Absolutely. But so of all of the opportunities and of all of the things you had to work through, so how do you think you came about to identifying those pivot points or the need to pivot? I mean, like you said, there's plenty of setbacks and mental and emotional and behavioral traumas that you have to work through. What do you think was a trigger for you that helped you to pivot?
Ann Marie Thrives:I try to watch my first words because our words matter, you know they. You know I don't want to get all new agey or whatever. Matter, you know they. You know I don't want to get all new agey or whatever. That's not what I'm about. But I I believe that our, our words create our lives, and so, um, we were talking earlier about how you have children.
Ann Marie Thrives:You know, and I feel that if a child is, let's say a child is walking down the street and you're right behind them, you know, and they trip over something and they fall, I used to work at kids church, at my church, and one thing that I learned is that if you get into a state of fear in front of that child, right, it makes whatever's going on with that kid worse than it is. It could be just the smallest of scrapes or it could be a big gash that you have to take them to the hospital. For how we react with them, you know, getting down on their level and saying I'm so sorry this happened to you. Let's figure out what we can do instead of. You know, I'm Italian, so what first thing we do is probably scream oh my God. You know, and so I noticed that you know that might not be the best way to handle the situation, and so it's OK to scream. It's OK to do that, but in certain situations, because we need our minds to accept what's happened, to speak life into it, even if it looks like death, because then there isn't that. You know that closure that happens, you know, kind of like that tightness of the belt to where, you know, one of the worst words that our brains can hear is I can't, because as soon as it hears that it stops.
Ann Marie Thrives:You know, and you've got the hypothalamus back there that believes anything that you tell it. It's just constantly listening. So, whether it's good or it's bad, it's there and it's listening, and it's going to take what your mind is going to take what you say and try to bring reality to it, because it believes that what you just said is the truth. So it starts to find ways to make that happen right. And so we need to be in that state of hope and not freak out when things happen and I mean, I've had plenty of opportunities to freak out and I did.
Ann Marie Thrives:I learned that you know it's. It doesn't help you or the situation, if you, you know, just come from a place of fear and a place of hopelessness, because there's always someone there that can help you. Someone there, like when I had, you know, my rollover, where I was paralyzed it was very early in the morning and a few days later, because I lost control of the car. Um, one of the wheels had fallen off, I didn't know it, and so the car was going, you know, side to side and eventually, you know, there was a song back then, cause this was uh, early nineties, I think, yeah, and uh, I love music. It was playing on the radio was Curie Lason, which is, you know, I don't know if you know that, remember that song, but basically it's, it's a Latin term that means Lord, have mercy, right.
Ann Marie Thrives:And so it's like Lord, have mercy on the road that I must travel. But now the Lord that the road that I'm traveling is like coming out from under me, you know. And I remember thinking to myself I can't control the car anymore, it's just going everywhere it wants. No matter how I turn the wheel, it seems to go in the opposite direction. And I'm listening to this song and I'm thinking to myself this is interesting. And then I was like I think I'm going to die, because that's how bad the car was just going. And it was a big car because I had borrowed my dad's blazer just to put more stuff in the car to bring to my new apartment that was right next to my new job, you know, um. And so I thought to myself I'm gonna die and I just closed my eyes. And then I remember hearing let go of the wheel, because I was trying to control the situation.
Ann Marie Thrives:But when I let go of the wheel, what they told me? There there was a guy behind me who was he was a lawn keeper and he was going. He had his own lawn business, so he was going somewhere early in the morning, and then there were two guys on you know the overpass where I was going, and so they told me how the car went back and forth and back and forth and I was not wearing my seatbelt that day. Back and forth and back and forth and I was not wearing my seatbelt that day. Um, and I'm glad that I wasn't, because when the car went up on the embankment it it hit a tree right in the driver's door and it went in like this, and if I had my seatbelt on my head would have been right there and I would have.
Ann Marie Thrives:I would have been, it would have hit me right in the temple, you know. Um, so these are the things that I look at and why did they happen? And and not, you know, not to the point where you're like, why did this happen to me? Or, you know, when you internalize things too much, that's not a good thing for us either, but just looking back and being grateful, you know is is one of the things that that helped me. So how can I get myself out? And just you know, as you go through, things there's, there's never. You may feel like you're backed into a corner. That's one of the things that I learned, but we're never really backed into a corner, because there's always a way out. You know we may be in that mystery room.
Ann Marie Thrives:I don't know where the door is, but I promise you there's more where the door is.
Josh Porthouse:but I promise you there's more. Even as a kid you think that I mean. Obviously you got through that as well. But I mean, when you came to the States in the beginning, the language was different, the culture was different, the people were different, the customs courtesies were different. That alone has to be overwhelming and, you know, curious and frightening, and everything all at once. How do you rationalize that when you really don't have one of your senses to try to reason through the situation?
Ann Marie Thrives:You know, school was very hard for me. So then, coming home and being with my family, you know, helped because we all shared the same struggle.
Ann Marie Thrives:So we kind of helped each other out with those struggles, you know, and and we'd talk about the stuff that happened, you know which, which was a neat thing. And it became like I had like two comfort zones, because now I'm integrating into the culture but I'm also going back home with that culture and so there was great things that were going on with that culture and then other things happening in the other culture. So it's like you're between these two places and they each have their sweet spot, you know. And the household was loud and I've never been a loud person, with or without the brain injury, you know. But the neat thing was there was a library literally right across the street. So I would like go to the library. I got to study or whatever, and that was, that was my piece. So you look for places where you could find that piece. Hopefully it's in a healthy, you know, in a healthy way, but there's always a place to, you know, go a healthy way, but there's always a place to, you know, go to, to regroup. And I think there's a lot of things that we can, that you know, a lot of resources that we have now that we didn't have before, and so I there's a lot of resources out there to help us to get out of the funk that we're in were in.
Ann Marie Thrives:For me it was. It was either quiet or, you know, sometimes those voices are so barraging with the doubt that, for you know, music is a big thing for me, and sometimes I turn that music on so loud that I can't even hear myself think, which is a good thing, because vibrations our bodies are, you know, we're, we're energy, we're light, and so there's that vibration there, right? Because doubt and unbelief and fear bring your vibration down, and so by increasing the vibration, it starts to build like the serotonin and the dopamine and the stuff that we need to change our moods serotonin and the dopamine and the stuff that we need to change our moods. So I'm big on self-care, whether it's journaling, music, you know, taking long walks, whatever it is that you need to take care of yourself, you know, do that. I take a lot of like five minute timeouts, you know, sometimes it's a process and balance.
Ann Marie Thrives:Yeah, Because thinking is a is a wonderful thing, and having a vision for your life, even if you're not sure what it is. You know, I teach, um, I started teaching a couple of years ago. Uh, not see this. This is what happens once in a while. Vision board workshops yes.
Ann Marie Thrives:And so you know, just to give people hope that you know there's still life out there and statistics show that people who have goals and write them down or have them up are people who succeed. I think it's like 80 to 90 percent very high, it's like 90 something but not only the ones that write them down. It's like a scale of increase. So those who have them and don't write them down, there's a percentage. Those who have them and do, it's a higher percentage. And so the numbers keep going up the more you revisit those goals, because our minds see the image like we were talking about before and then it tries to make itself into that image.
Josh Porthouse:All right, folks, sit tight and we'll be right back on Transacting Value.
Josh Porthouse:Join us for Transacting Value, where we discuss practical applications of personal values, every Monday at 9 am on our website, transactingvaluepodcastcom. Wednesdays at 5 pm and Sundays at noon on wreathsacrossamericaorg slash radio.
Ann Marie Thrives:The numbers keep going up, the more you revisit those goals, because our minds see the image like we were talking about before and then it tries to make itself into that image.
Josh Porthouse:That's sort of the key then too. I suppose you either come up with the image on your own intuition, or whatever creative spark applies.
Josh Porthouse:Right whatever creative spark applies, right. Or you find the inspiration somewhere in something else and then create or recreate something similar, right. So, in gaining the inspiration for how you wanted to recover and how you wanted your life to be and what you want it to become, I mean, even now, where do you like you've become an inspiration for people and a way for people to gain a perspective that you know? No offense to your circumstances, but hopefully they don't have to go through.
Ann Marie Thrives:Yeah.
Josh Porthouse:And so, where do you find inspiration? Where do you get your vision from? What do you draw from?
Ann Marie Thrives:Well, I draw from the Bible. That's my biggest inspiration, because there's so many uh stories of people that have overcome adversity. One of the books that I wrote was about Esther, and she's one of the heroines that saved the Jewish people. Uh, when they were in Babylonian captivity, and so she turned the fear of you know her uncle Mordecai they were she was taken into the harem. He was working for the king, you know, he was one of the people at the palace, and so when they found out about this edict, which is a law that the people were going to be, you know, he said to her you know, how do you know, if God didn't put you here in this place for such a time as this?
Ann Marie Thrives:And she was like, well, you don't understand, if I don't get called in by him, calling me in, right, and I go in there by myself without being invited, I could die. That's a law. And so she decided she was going to fast, she was going to pray. She did that for three days. She asked him for do this, to do the same thing, and she put her fear aside and went forward and, you know, made up a plan that you know she was going to tell him what was happening and you know, she was accepted into the room. She wasn't killed and she was able to, you know, save her people.
Ann Marie Thrives:And so that that moment of putting aside our fear because for me, when I was laying in the hospital bed, right, it's like I had to go to the bathroom, really bad when they took me to the hospital and I remember the nurse saying to me you know, she put her hand on my shoulder and I'm like I really gotta pee and she goes, and she goes just like because they hadn't told me anything yet. You know, she put her hand on my shoulder and I'm like I really gotta pee and she goes, and she goes just like cause I hadn't told me anything yet, you know, um, I just I'm on adrenaline, but I haven't tried to get up and walk yet, you know. And so I'm not really feeling anything just yet. And so she put her hand on my shoulder and she said to me she said, honey, she goes. I don't want to scare you, she goes, but you can't move a muscle because you're going to be completely paralyzed if you do. And I'm like, what do you mean? Completely? What are you talking about? And the funny thing is is that God will I choose it to call it God, you can call it the universe or whatever you want but I feel like people come in at just the right time, you know, and the the first doctor that came in, he was like, oh, you're doing OK, you just got a few cuts or whatever, and you know we're going to release you in a few minutes and you should be all right, ok, so, still on adrenaline, not feeling it much, just at the time that I was about to get up to to you know, like he said, you're going to be discharged. I was about to get up to to, you know, like he said, you're going to be discharged.
Ann Marie Thrives:My brother comes walking through the room. He comes walking in and the guy's like, okay, you can get up now and leave. And I and I tried to get up and I could move my shoulders but and I can move my hands, but I can't move my legs and I can't move my legs, my shoulders and my whole body together. You know how you try to get out of bed and your whole body just kind of with you. That wasn't happening and I was like this and my brother was like you get out of here and get another freaking doctor those his words, right and you lay there until somebody else comes.
Ann Marie Thrives:So the guy left and he got another doctor and they took me because I hadn't even been x-rayed at that point. So when the x-ray came back, there was a vertebrae in the middle of my spine that had had cracked all the way, like straight, like this, and it had bent in and the spinal cord was an eighth of an inch from being severed. Good thing was, you know, the the break was clean and there were no fragments anywhere, right, and so I was flat on my hiney for months on end because they did not want to flip me over, because flipping me over would dip me, which would make the bone dip, which would cut the spinal cord, and so they didn't want to do surgery, they wanted me to lay flat. So here I am, laying, here, you know, and I prayed a lot and I did what I was talking about where? Where do I want to be? What do I want to be, how do you know? And so I started envisioning myself walking and I'm like, how do I make this happen? And then, you know, I just felt like God's saying to me how powerful my brain was and that with my brain, I could start to. So the first thing I heard was tell your toes to wiggle.
Ann Marie Thrives:So, I remember, after, eventually, the toes started to wiggle and then from there it was like you know, doing your, stretching with, with your, with your feet back and forth, then circling my, my, my ankles, uh, my ankles, and then trying to lift my leg, which was really, really hard. That took a long time, but it just was a long process. But I kept seeing myself walking. I wasn't gonna, you know, um, and even to the nurse, when you know, after they did the x-ray, and I told her, I says I have to go to the bathroom, and she said that to me and I said, well, maybe I shouldn't have had that second cup of coffee this morning. Huh, and she started laughing and you know, um, but you know, once they knew what was going on, then she was able to help me. But, um, it was just a long process and you have to sometimes go through that process, but the good thing is is that we go through, you know.
Josh Porthouse:So we get to the other side and it sounds to me like of all of these experiences you've had, you've been traveling into these unknown spaces. You know where we're at seven, you're figuring out, you know, new culture, new you. And at 20, you're figuring out new job, new you. And and then a few years later you're figuring out new you, new you, you know, and all of these things to try to relearn and reinvent. I mean well, first off, congratulations. I assume that means you're walking now or able to walk now.
Josh Porthouse:Dude. That's crazy in and itself. But then you write books now as well, which I guess it was a matter of time. Of all the thought and vision you put into this, it had to come out somewhere. So okay, so you have one book.
Ann Marie Thrives:I have three that I wrote myself, two that I edited for um, there are two devotionals, uh and uh, so four of them are uh bestsellers. So really yeah so now I'm teaching other people how to. That's. That's another thing that we just took on after we did?
Ann Marie Thrives:uh, my partner and I, we we edited those two devotionals and we were like, hey, we want to get other people, who people just started coming out of the woodwork? You, you know for her and for me, hey, can you help me write my book? And so now we're helping aspiring authors to get their words out. So that's an example that we just added yeah, cause everybody has.
Josh Porthouse:Absolutely, and there's something to be said for that, because, I mean, think about it, had you been able to go up, or just think you could get up and go pee you wouldn't have been able to help as many people as you have so far and, indirectly, the amount of people that they've been able to reach based on their books, their stories, right, jeez, okay, all right, I'm getting ahead of myself. That's ridiculous, okay, okay. So then now you, I assume, have some degree of gratitude that's carrying through all of these things, or you wouldn't be giving back to help other people and you'd be storing all that for yourself and the goodwill and whatever else. So what, I guess, outlets, do you have to communicate these things, your story in your book? And then, obviously, when you talk to people, but but you know the, the unwritten things, the things you can't see, the intrinsic qualities, values, I suppose how do you convey that to other people? Is it behavior? Is it conversation?
Ann Marie Thrives:For me, gratitude is a big thing. I'm actually writing a thesis because I'm one thesis short of my MBA from a business and ministry. It's a business and ministry degree program that I signed up for. I came across my lap, so I figured okay, so I did everything and now I just have this one piece. And writing a thesis is totally different than writing a book. But the topic I chose is how gratefulness and self-care bring about mental agility, and that mental agility helps us, increases the dopamine um, the serotonin, in our brains, like I said before, and so that helps us be more successful so gratitude you I'm sorry because you're saying gratitude or your theory, I guess self-care yeah gratitude and self-care help you be more mentally agile yeah how is that?
Josh Porthouse:what is your theory?
Ann Marie Thrives:because when you're in a state of gratefulness and you're taking care of yourself and you're exercising and journaling and doing these things that increase the rhythm in your body, then you're working at a different level mentally, make better decisions, you're able to see things more clearly because there's more focus, and so when something like this happens, it's not the end of the world. Or when something happens, it's not the end of the world because you, your mind, is trained that there's hope. And one of the things that that they told me is that I was very active when this accident happened and I had just gotten my I don't know it was one of my belts. I took Kung Fu with one of my friends. It was a thing that we thought we'd try and we were the only two girls in the class.
Ann Marie Thrives:And so when this happened because I had been in that state of, you know, keeping my spine straight, keeping my posture straight, you know and I had a talk with my doctor about this and he said if you hadn't been doing X, y and Z, because I also did aerobics and I did weights Nautilus was big at the time, I don't know if anybody remembers that so we were using the machines at the gym before our workouts and stuff, and so that was strengthening my body and building up the muscles around the spine and and in my you know what I mean so in, in, even my legs and everywhere else, and so being in that state of fitness made things not be as you know. If you will, yeah, it is.
Josh Porthouse:It is pretty wild, you know, sometimes well, I think all the time. But let's just say sometimes for the sake of argument, that we don't know how what we're doing is going to set us up for some degree of success in the future, to to live through some, you know, transition or or crisis or or excellence or whatever the outcome happens to be. But usually, at least, the more amazing instances to me are the ones where whatever we've been doing that we think is going to get us to point A actually helps us succeed through point B, when we didn't even know that was a possibility. They didn't register on the radar, for example. I think values are a shortcut to identity and conversation and relationship, even with yourself or with other people, and so this is a good point.
Josh Porthouse:This is a segment of the show called Developing Character D-D-D-Developing Character. It's two questions as in-depth and as vulnerable as you prefer to answer. It's up to you. But because of those things and your degree of self-awareness you've built, now I'm curious about some of your values, and we've talked about gratitude and a few to this point, but specifically in the beginning, I mean that had to start from somewhere. So my first question is what were some of your values growing up or that you remember being exposed to?
Ann Marie Thrives:Well, I grew up in a Christian household and so God was always there to a degree, right. And then when I was on my own, as I got older, I did go through a time where you know when these things happen to you in a row, you know where you consistently, you know, every time it just seemed like every time I was trying to move forward, something stupid would happen, and it wasn't necessarily me doing it. You know, every single car accident that I've been in has been some person who was not paying attention, ran a stop sign, ran a light. You know, every single car accident that I've been in has been some person who was not paying attention, ran a stop sign, ran a light, you know, got too close and ended up smashing into me, you know. And so you start to wonder where is God, you know, but time has gone by and it's and it's only been, you know, like I said, the past few years where I really had to cling to that Cause, even when I had breast cancer. You know, they, they don't let you stay in the hospital forever. You know, I w, I was, I had major surgery, 10 hour surgery and uh and and I, I got released like two and a half days you're in ICU. For you know, then you're up and walking around and no grass growing under those feet, and and so you know, they, they make you go home. And and I remember, that night in bed it was terrible. I mean, I ha, I had at least 125 or 30, I don't even remember how many stitches now. You know may have been 150. I don't know.
Ann Marie Thrives:Anyway, um, my point is we had had my dad here, um, as I mentioned before, he was with us for quite a few months and we ended up setting up room for him because we had just moved here. We didn't know what we were going to do with that other room yet, because I want a library. But then I was like I don't know, you know. So we went back and forth and then the back and forth ended because my dad came. So here's your bed, here's your dresser, here's your bed, here's your dresser, here's your little recliner. You could stay here, and if you don't want to watch TV with us, you could, you know, be in your own room and what have you, and just try to make them feel at home. So that morning, when I was lying in bed, I couldn't get up. I had no core, I had no upper body strength, you know Um, and I remember I was like God. Why did they release me?
Ann Marie Thrives:You know that was doing everything for me. Now I can't even roll over, get out of bed, go eat whatever, and and I remember I just heard in my head you have a hospital bed in the other room go sit on the recliner. So what I remember from that time is being in that room where, where my dad passed, you know my husband's husband's sitting laying on the bed because he took FMLA and he's he's taking care of me and I'm in the chair. And then at night we were watching Christmas movies because my surgery was the beginning of December, and so those are the things I remember is him sitting next to me, him making breakfast, him making the meals, him helping me, me, you know, but resourcefulness, we're never without the things that we need to help us in that period of time, that's. One thing that I've learned is that the resources are already there, even if we don't think that they are um the resources are within us.
Ann Marie Thrives:You know they either come out of us or they come to us, but they're there. Um, and I get the message out in whatever way. You know, same either come out of us or they come to us, but they're there. And I get the message out in whatever way. You know, same thing it comes to me, the resources are there. It's either word of mouth or Facebook or all of those medias out there. I just started doing podcasts because I really felt like it's time to speak up. It's not a time to be quiet anymore.
Josh Porthouse:All right, folks sit tight, We'll be right back on Transacting Value.
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Ann Marie Thrives:I just started doing podcasts because I really felt like it's time to speak up. It's not a time to be quiet anymore.
Josh Porthouse:I'm glad you started talking. I think your story is super cool, mostly, though, to me, because you found something about you that you could stand on, not something about you that you didn't have to stand on, and that's a powerful lesson. But it's difficult. It's not at least in my experience, it's not something that you come by easily. It takes work, effort, refinement, and then your vision shifts and changes, and then, eventually, you look back and you're like well, actually, this is the whole thing that I've been building the whole time. Right, it's very Bob Ross of you, if that means anything. Yeah, yeah, that's wild, so okay. So let me ask you this then and I guess, for the sake of time, this is probably one of my last two questions but of all of your experiences, then, and the resourcefulness that you've gained and the self-awareness that you've gained, like for you individually as a person, all the doubt and everything you had along the way, what now, looking back, has it all actually done for your own self-worth?
Ann Marie Thrives:Being an immigrant. You know, when I was little, there was a lot of quietness because you can't talk, right, I had hours at school where I couldn't talk because I don't know how to communicate with you. I don't know how to communicate with you, I don't know what to say to you, and even if I do say something to you, you're not going to understand that. So that led me to, you know, a really quiet life. I just didn't think that my voice mattered. And I remember one time a whole bunch of us were hanging out and then my sister and I and a couple of our guy friends were left and I said something. I don't remember what it was, I don't even think it was important, but the point is that I opened my mouth to say something and he said um, he said something like go ahead and keep talking so we could talk over you, and he was kidding around. But I took that.
Ann Marie Thrives:You know people have been doing that my whole life, you know, is talking over me, and so, um, so that's why I just kind of stayed to myself and never really said anything. But, um, you know, now I'm older and I'm wiser, and, and I feel that, wouldn't it be neat if there was a world where we could learn from other people who have gone before us and made those mistakes Cause then, after a learn from other people who have gone before us and made those mistakes Cause then, after a while, other people won't make their own mistakes because they're learned from other people. They'll watch us and they'll see what we did and you know they'll wait before they do things or they'll do things without being fearful, in a moment that you know we can't have fear right now because our life is on the line, Right, I mean, maybe that's a little dramatic, but, um, you know, just just to be out there and just share what's happened so that people know that there's there's hope for whatever you're going through.
Josh Porthouse:Well, um, I guess then let me be the first to formally welcome you to the new world. Be the first to formally welcome you to the new world. I think it's a pretty auspicious journey. You started midlife, but here we are again in a new pivot, I suppose. So add that to your collection For the introvert over here.
Ann Marie Thrives:Yeah, yeah, because after I went back to work from my accident, I literally could go Monday through Friday I would work, and then I wouldn't talk to anybody after I got home until it was time to go back to work on Monday. That's how great I am being by myself.
Josh Porthouse:Well, but again, if you didn't have those opportunities, imagine how much introspection you would have sacrificed. So again, you know, when you look back, like you said, there's a silver lining to all of it, even if you don't see it in the moment. Correct, anne-marie, for the amount of experience we've gotten, I feel like you should have been charging me for my time, because what you've been able to put into this conversation and, I think, more importantly, what you are seemingly starting to find a way to communicate effectively, as your story is extremely, extremely undervalued. I'm glad I found out about you and your story and my team was able to get you on the show when we did, because now we have plenty of time to bring you back over the next few years and decades and hear what other kinds of cool things you've done and more of your voice. So in the meantime, though, for anybody that wants to get in touch with you, track down your books, find out more about your stories at their own pace, on their own time. Where do people go?
Ann Marie Thrives:I have a website that has all of my books and there's also a couple of um, a couple of free downloads, uh, 10 key, vital keys to uh go from surviving to thriving. Um and uh, how to be empowered, you know, in a business setting, like five keys to do that.
Ann Marie Thrives:So those are free, that people can get my books around there. 31 days. A stable christmas is like you know, 31 days of you know, um, how to be joyful, how to you know things like that to help us through the holidays, because for some people it could be really toxic, you know, and, uh, you know it's a hard time, um, for a lot of people. So it's all on my website, which is we thrive at lifecom, weriveatlifecom wethriveatlifecom.
Josh Porthouse:I'm noticing a trend. Yeah, there's a lot of thriving going on in your life and, again, I'm glad that it is and I'm glad that you are For everybody who's new to this show. Depending on the player you're streaming this conversation or watching this conversation on, you can click see more. You can click show more and then in the drop down description for this conversation you will see links to we thrive at lifecom, where you can track down Anne-Marie and find access to her books and more of her story and inspiration. I love what you're doing, I love this conversation. I love your energy. It's it's super contagious. And then, obviously, your story is way, way intriguing. There's way too much to even tie into, but I'm glad we found a way to at least start. And next time, when you find yourself with an opportunity and a spare microphone, come back and we'll talk some more, but for now, thank you for your time.
Ann Marie Thrives:Thank you, Josh.
Josh Porthouse:Absolutely Everybody else who tuned into our conversation. Thank you guys for hanging out, listening to us entertaining Anne-Marie, letting her entertain you, whatever it was that worked for you. This go around and, like I said, if you want to hear more of our conversations, you can go to transactingvaluepodcastcom On our homepage. Even on the top right side of the screen you'll see a leave a voicemail button. Here's what that can do for you Two minutes of talk time all yours. What can you do with it? Let us know what you think of the show, let us know what you think of this conversation and in my opinion, it's up to you. But, more importantly, leave comments for Anne-Marie and we can forward them to her too. Let her know Feedback.
Josh Porthouse:I think positive, constructive feedback is hard to come by in the world today and, like you said in the beginning, I suppose in a manner of speaking, gratitude begets gratitude, so on and so forth. So I know all of us would appreciate it. But until next time, that was Transacting Value. Thank you to our show partners and folks. Thank you for tuning in and appreciating our value as we all grow through life together, to check out our other conversations or even to contribute through feedback follows time, money or talent, and to let us know what you think of the show. Please leave a review on our website, transactingvaluepodcastcom.
Josh Porthouse:We also stream new episodes every Monday at 9 am Eastern Standard Time through all of your favorite podcasting platforms like Spotify, iheart and TuneIn. You can now hear Transacting Value on Wreaths Across America Radio Head to. You can now hear Transacting Value on Wreaths Across America Radio Head to wreathsacrossamericaorg. Slash transactingvalue to sponsor a wreath and remember, honor and teach the value of freedom for future generations. On behalf of our team and our global ambassadors, as you all strive to establish clarity and purpose, ensure social tranquility and secure the blessings of liberty or individual sovereignty of character for yourselves and your posterity, we will continue instigating self-worth and we'll meet you there. Until next time, that was Transacting Value.
