“Discovering the Real You: Healing, Identity, and God’s Plan”

Transformation begins with self-discovery, peeling back layers of hurt and false identities to reveal who we truly are. Season 8 kicks off by exploring the foundation of the Empower Her program: healing from past wounds, understanding our true identity, and trusting God's purpose.

• Healing requires releasing the hurts we've carried—whether rejection, betrayal, or loss
• Forgiveness isn't about excusing what happened but freeing our hearts
• Many of us become "chameleons," changing ourselves to fit in with different groups
• Finding our true identity starts with understanding we are children of God
• Learning to trust God means surrendering control and believing His plan is bigger
• Our past experiences aren't random but are preparing us for our purpose
• What seems like being a "jack of all trades" is often God weaving together our gifts

Enrollment for the Empower Her 12-week coaching program is opening soon! Class begins September 28th at 5pm Central Standard Time. Schedule your interview now and mention this episode to receive 25% off your enrollment. Spots are limited, so don't wait.

Resources Mentioned:

EmpowerHer Purpose Program

Interested on coaching but still not sure? Grab your free copy of:
EmpowerHer Purpose Guide

MAMI on a Mission LLC: info@mamionamission.com

Grab your Copy of my book MAMI on a Mission - A Guide Towards Healing, Self-Discovery and Walking in Confidence for a signed copy order from the website. 

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Chapters

• 0:00 Introducing Season 8: Self-Discovery
• 3:20 Healing Through Forgiveness
• 8:01 Finding True Identity
• 10:41 Trusting God's Plan
• 15:30 Discovering Your Purpose
• 21:21 Empower Her Program Details

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Have you ever felt like you're walking around with extra weight on your shoulders, like you're doing all the things but deep down, you're not even sure who you really are anymore? Maybe you've been carrying old hurts or wearing labels that never really fit. What if today could be the start of peeling all that back? And that's exactly what we're diving into today on Mommy on a Mission podcast and Amiga. Before we jump in, I want to let you know that enrollment for my Empower Her 12-week coaching program is opening soon. Class begins September 28th at 5 pm, central Standard Time, and this is your chance to walk through this transformation with me, step by step. So schedule your interview now and if you mention this episode, you'll get 25% off your enrollment. Don't wait. Spots are limited.

Speaker 1: 0:55

Welcome to the Mommy on a Mission podcast. I'm Mariana, your host and the number one bestselling author of Mommy on a Mission a guide towards healing self-discovery and walking in confidence. As a dedicated life coach, wife, mom yaya and, most importantly, daughter of the king, I am passionate about empowering multifaceted women just like you. In each episode, we dive deep into transformative topics that help you reignite your passion and purpose. My unique approach is designed to help you overcome the fear of external expectations and create the space and time you need for both increased job satisfaction and personal growth. Join me on this journey of self-discovery and empowerment, as we explore practical strategies, inspiring stories and actionable insights. Together, we'll navigate the complexities of life and emerge stronger, more confident and truly aligned with our deepest desires. Welcome to the Mom in a Mission podcast, your go-to resource for living a more purposeful and fulfilling life. So grab your Tazza cafe y vamos a platicar. Hey, mommy, welcome back to Mommy on a Mission podcast. I am so glad you're here with me today. Listen, I want you to grab your cafecito, your notepad and a pen, because you're going to want to take some notes for this one.

Speaker 1: 2:24

We're kicking off season eight with a brand new series based on the Empower Her 12-week program. This first part is all about self-discovery and clarity and, honestly, this is where transformation really begins. So let's dive in. Before we can step into who God created us to be, we've got to face the things we've been carrying. Jesus said in Matthew 11, 28, come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. And, mommy, I know what it's like to be weary. I want to be real with you for just a moment.

Speaker 1: 3:00

One of the biggest hurts I carried was with my dad. One of the biggest hurts I carried was with my dad. I loved him dearly and I also caught glimpses of his joy, like him dancing when he was laughing with his friends playing softball, family vacations. But, honestly, those moments were rare, they were very far in between, and what stuck with me was where the physical abuse, the harsh words and the constant feeling that I wasn't enough. So I have a twin sister, but I can't speak for her feelings or what she experienced.

Speaker 1: 3:38

I can only speak about my personal experience and that is what I constantly battled with was that I felt I was never enough. And why do I say that? I say that? Because growing up in the household and of course this is expected from every family right, you know, make good grades, you know, make sure you're doing things right. But it was like, even though I made good grades, it's always like, oh, you can do better than that. It was never, hey, great job. Or hey, look at you, you were able to do it. No, it was always you could do more. And when you hear that a lot, it almost makes you feel like, well dang. None of the efforts I ever did was good enough right, or I would never feel good enough.

Speaker 1: 4:30

So when he passed away suddenly in an accident, when I was just 10, I didn't know how to handle that grief. I stuffed it down for years, and perhaps it would even come out as anger, as frustration, as rebelliousness. It would just come out in different ways. However, I never put it together as if that were grief, and I don't think anybody else did too. I think for so many people it was, oh, that was just teenage behavior, not knowing that deep down inside there was something really going on. And even though I wanted to forgive him, it felt impossible. Now, don't get me wrong, because I love my daddy. My daddy was to me the best you know, because that's who I knew, that's what I grew up knowing, and over years, though, I could really see how the effect of some things that stood out in my life would affect me. Later, that changed everything.

Speaker 1: 5:41

I realized that forgiveness wasn't about excusing what happened. It was about freeing my heart. And here's the thing, and this is the one that I think I struggled with the most, because when we think of forgiveness, we think of someone saying I'm sorry or I apologize, and you're able to respond back to that. Or perhaps it's you saying I'm sorry or I apologize, and you're able to respond back to that. Or perhaps it's you saying you know what? I know that life wasn't easy. I know that things were tough. Maybe you were going through some things and I forgive you for the actions, and then you're waiting for that. I'm so sorry, but how do you do that when someone you love has passed away?

Speaker 1: 6:25

When someone you love has passed away and so that was one of the assignments that I have my clients do is write a forgiveness letter, because I think it's very important to understand that we need to release those feelings, that we need to have an outlet to be able to get it out of us, and I mean I think about the hurts or disappointments you've carried maybe rejection, betrayal or loss and isn't it wild how those past experiences shape how we see ourselves, our relationships, even our faith? But what if your pain isn't a life sentence? What if it's actually a doorway to freedom? Even reflecting on just one hurt you've carried can be so powerful. Imagine waking up, feeling lighter, like the weight that's been pressing on you for years is finally lifting, and that's what healing begins to do. So let me ask you what's one hurt? You're ready to start releasing even just a little Girl? Let me be honest with you.

Speaker 1: 7:38

My journey didn't go in some perfect order. I didn't even know where to begin. I was just constantly trying to figure out who I really was. You know that phrase I need to find myself. I used to hear it and think what does that even mean? That search really started in junior high, like, I think, for most people right. That awkward stage where everyone's trying to fit in with a group and I never knew where I belonged. And after my dad passed, it only got more confusing. See, we had grown up with birthdays, holidays, family traditions. Then my mom shifted from Catholic to Jehovah's Witnesses and or witness and suddenly what I knew was no more. So I became like a chameleon. I blended in wherever I was different hairstyles, different clothes just trying to fit in. And if we're going to really be real, this was around the 80s, when I was a teenager. So you know that Aquanet hairspray was all up in this hair. I had that flip hairstyle, the wings and everything. Girl, I'm in truly 80s style, you know, just really trying to. I mean, if you can go back to the 80s pictures, you know the ones that kind of like resurfaced on Facebook. Okay, that was me. I had that type of hairstyle, the, the eyeliner, I mean all of it, right.

Speaker 1: 9:12

There were moments that I didn't know if I was. You know the term chola, you know a pachuca. I didn't know if I wanted to. You know, be the white girl, and no offense to any of you, so I don't want y'all to come at me, you know because I'm. But it was just like I didn't know what I wanted to be, like I wasn't Mexican enough for the Mexicans. I was always asked if I was mixed. And then, now that I have my DNA test because I did ancestry right it turns out that, yes, I'm a blend of a lot of little things here and there, you know. So it makes sense, right. But that's the thing.

Speaker 1: 9:50

Deep down, I felt like I didn't belong anywhere, and that carried into adulthood until February 14, 2000, the day I gave my life to Jesus. Yes, on Valentine's Day out of all days, and that's when my real identity journey began. John 1.12 says but to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God. That's when I stopped being a chameleon y'all and started walking as his daughter. So there I ask if every false label was peeled away, who would you discover underneath? But here's the thing Finding my identity also meant I had to learn to trust God.

Speaker 1: 10:42

And let me tell you, that was not easy. I struggled with always needing to be in control. Why? Because for so long I was doing everything on my own. I was the fixer, the enabler, the safety net, and I came face to face with that in my second marriage. It felt like I wasn't just fighting with him, I was fighting with something so much bigger, like past, present and future all colliding at once. I thought abuse was normal.

Speaker 1: 11:17

I believe the lies. You're not good enough, you can't do anything. I even turned a blind eye to adultery when my ex-husband was out there. Well, when he was, you know, I committed adultery with him, and then there was fornication going on. He was sleeping around with other women and it was just like I was turning a blind eye. Why? Because I believe that I wasn't good enough. I was convinced a blind eye. Why? Because I believe that I wasn't good enough. I was convinced those lies were true. But as I began to open the word, god started breaking those chains, and so I'll take you to Matthew 17, 20.

Speaker 1: 11:53

It says that faith, as small as a mustard seed, can move mountains. And, girl, all I had was that mustard seed. And do y'all know how small a mustard seed is? And if you don't, I challenge you to go to your local grocery store. Go to the section where they sell mustard seeds, and you're going to see how small it's a little bitty, little bitty, like. You can like squeeze it with your fingers and it'll poof like, turn into a little powder. But that's how small a mustard seed is and that's how small faith is needed by God. Just that small.

Speaker 1: 12:34

So I had to learn that I can't control everything, but I can make choices, choices to live for Christ, not for anyone else, not even my kids. I had to face the generational curses that were creeping into their lives and say no more. And it was in that surrender, learning to put my full faith and trust in him, that God began to shift my entire life. So where in your life have you been leaning on yourself instead of trusting God? And that trust I made is what led me straight into my purpose. I remember the last time my husband beat me, I was lying there looking up and I saw the scared look on my young son's face and in that moment I knew I couldn't stay. I couldn't let my son believe that this was normal or my daughter believe that this was what a woman was supposed to live through. That moment gave me the courage to leave. I walked into church and enrolled in Celebrate Recovery and that became my first real experience with support groups. I realized I wasn't alone and I had friends, strong women in Christ who also surrounded me at work, who gave me that strength, that energy, that motivation to keep going, to move forward. I learned tools and it opened the door to me going back to college and, for the first time, finishing something I had started.

Speaker 1: 14:11

Life didn't magically get easy after that I would be lying to you if I did, but it didn't. It got hard and it got even harder. Why? Because the enemy knows that you're about to make a huge shift, a shift where God is about to lead you and he doesn't like that. So what happens? The more? The deeper you get into your faith, the deeper you get into God's word, the stronger the struggles will start to become and honestly you would think, god, didn't you already go through some struggles with that ex-husband and stuff? Yes, but these were differently, because these were forces that were trying to stop me from doing what God was calling me to do.

Speaker 1: 15:00

I struggled financially. I had to come clean with my family about the truth I had hidden for so long and still, every time I thought things were settling, something new would pop off. I used to think it would never, ever get better. But, girl, I was so wrong. But, girl, I was so wrong. So here we are now, 20, 21 years later, and I see it. I see it. God was equipping me, he was preparing me, he was transitioning me, he was lining me up for my calling. I used to think I was a jack of all trades and a master of none. How many of you have heard that before? You're the person that knows a little bit of everything, but you can't just hone in on just one thing, so you just do everything. But now I see it differently, because what God was doing was that God was shaping me, my degree, my skills, my passions. They weren't random. He was weaving together my natural gifts and the spiritual gifts he placed in me.

Speaker 1: 16:07

I'm not an author because I'm the best writer. I'm an author because I'm willing to share my story. I'm not a podcaster because I'm perfect at it. I'm a podcaster because I'm willing to use my voice. I'm not a life coach because I have life all figured out. I'm a life coach because my life has prepared me to say yes to the assignment God has given me.

Speaker 1: 16:33

See Jeremiah 29,. 11 says and this is one of my favorite verses, this one and Philippians 4, 13. These were my life verses, for I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future. And that is what I was looking for.

Speaker 1: 16:52

I didn't want to live a life of struggle, a life of hurt, a life of harm. I knew that God wanted more for me. I just didn't know what that was. I knew that he was planning something out, but I just couldn't see it back then. But I held on to hope. I held on to hope because I knew that my future was going to be different, but I just did not know what that was going to look like just yet. And now I see it. I see it.

Speaker 1: 17:26

I am so glad that I said yes to his call. I am so glad that God used me these last 20, 21 years to reshape me, to mold me into what I already was and whose I already was. I am his daughter, just like you are his daughter, and he wants more for you. He wants to reshape your life. He wants to remold you into that beautiful creation, the one that people have been, you know, hitting with that chisel and just kind of like cracking things open right, breaking you, trying to break you and remolding you to where you looked, all patched up, right. But God says let me take you, let me take this clay, let me add some water and let me remold it into something beautiful. Can you imagine that for yourself? So here's what I want you to reflect on this week. I want you to ask yourself what's one hurt I need to start releasing and I want you to write that down. And then I want you to go to where have I been blending in instead of living in my true identity? Have you been living life like a chameleon, like I was? Have you been living a life and hiding who you truly were, just to kind of fit in with other people, or so that other people could see you a different way. And let me just tell you this too it happens in Christianity a lot.

Speaker 1: 19:03

I remember a specific place that I used to work with and it was a faith-based organization and I knew because by this point I already knew that naturally I am a very happy person. I like to joke around, I love to dance, I sing off key, but that's okay, you know, I like to take pictures, like because I grew up with that. My grandparents and my family, we always had cameras, video cameras, everything. So we're not shy when it comes to cameras, you know. But I remember that I was trying to be a perfect Christian, if that makes sense. I wanted to be like I did no wrong.

Speaker 1: 19:50

But you know what? I wasn't being true to myself. Why? Because I'm not perfect. No one is perfect. We can try to aim for perfection, but in this lifetime we'll never achieve it. But we can make choices, better choices. We can make choices that align with God. Are we going to do it perfectly? Absolutely not, but we're trying right, and every day is a new challenge. That's why it says that we can't, you know, worry about tomorrow because today's got its own worries right. So even then even in Christianity, sometimes we try to appear as if we're perfect Christians and sometimes, because of that, we'll have the tendency to either be judged by others or we judge others ourselves. And then I want you to ask and do I trust God enough to believe his plan is bigger than what I've been settling for?

Speaker 1: 20:58

This conversation is just a glimpse of part one of Empower Her. And, mommy, if your heart is stirring, that's not by accident. I want to remind you that enrollment for Empower Her 12-week coaching is opening soon and class begins September 28th. We start at 5 pm, central Standard Time. So if this is something that you want to dive deeper into and you want to push yourself further and you want God to really speak into your heart, then schedule your interview today. The link is going to be in the show notes. And, don't forget, if you mention this episode, you'll get 25% off your enrollment. So I want to say thank you so much for hanging out with me today. Share this episode with another amiga you know, sister, whoever who needs encouragement and check the link in the show notes for all the details. And if you want to catch a glimpse of what we do, check out Facebook and Instagram.

Speaker 1: 22:07

I have pictures of the ladies that are currently in the course. Right now, I do it in person for a nonprofit organization called Adria Women's Health Center, and I also do it Friday evenings online via Zoom. I've got two wonderful ladies who's going through that, so I've got a total of eight women actually six, seven, eight, yes, eight women who are taking this course right now, and before that I had three other wonderful ladies who were part of the case study, who went through this entire program, and let me tell you their testimonies are nothing that I had ever expected. They truly, truly believed in this and that's why we're now offering it to the public. So, please, in this, and that's why we're now offering it to the public. So please share this, be a part of the empower her 12 week coaching program. And until next time, remember you are loved, you are chosen and you are on a mission.

Speaker 2: 23:12

Thank you for tuning in to the Mommy on a Mission podcast. If you found today's episode inspiring, don't forget to subscribe, leave a review and share it with your own media. And, before you go, if you're looking to guide people through healing, self-discovery and walking in confidence, be sure to grab a copy of my book Mommy on a Mission A Guide to achieving self-discovery and walking in confidence, available now on Amazon. Stay connected with me on social media. Follow us on Instagram at Mommy on a Mission Podcast and on Facebook at Mommy on a Mission. If you're considering working with a coach but aren't sure if you're ready, send me a DM and I will send you a free gift to help you get started on your journey until next saturday. Keep shining and remember the power is within you. Adios amigas.