Be Yourself! (Part 3) with Adam Howard

Welcome Adam Howard to the podcast! Today's interview explores a deep dive into why it's important to be yourself. Adam gives fundamental lessons on why you can't live in the shadows of other people and why you have to focus on what is important to you. 

So many of us are constantly wondering what others are thinking about us. Adam does a great job explaining why that is an unhealthy lifestyle to live. In addition, he gives some concrete examples on how to feel more comfortable in front of people and block out the noise you perceive as other people's judgements. 

If you are trying to feel more comfortable in your own skin and wondering how to fit in with social groups or where you stand in your own life, this episode is for you. Please check out Adam and his tremendous insight on how to be yourself!

Thanks and enjoy!

(Sorry, we had a few audio technicalities when recording this. It's still awesome!)

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:00

Are you looking to get an edit life but haven't been able to figure it out? Welcome to 10 to win, the podcast recorded by Kevin's title and columns.

SPEAKER_00 0:23

Welcome back to 10 to win the podcast, the podcast focusing on how to create a winning mindset in 10 minutes. This is part three of our Be Yourself series. If you are just tuning in for the first time, this is the interview portion. And today we have a very special guest. Jason, tell the listeners who's here with us today.

SPEAKER_04 0:41

That's right, Kevin. It's my pleasure to welcome Adam Howard onto the podcast today. Adam discovered a passion for custom cars and dracing, playing with Hot Wheels and slot cars as a kid. His parents gifted him a 71 Chevy Nova for Christmas when he was 18, which he drove on the streets and drag raced in high school. He played French horn and mellow phone in the high school band. Later, he became a bass guitarist in a local cover band. After high school, he attended community college to get certified as a firefighter and paramedic. He started his career as a firefighter paramedic at the age of 20. He has since been promoted to the rank of lieutenant and battalion chief. He and his younger brother operated an award-winning automotive upholstery business. Their work was featured in the Ford booth at the 2011 SEMA show in Las Vegas. His education includes a bachelor's degree from the University of Cincinnati, Fire Executive Officer Graduate Certificate from the National Fire Academy, where he was the recipient of an academic research award from the U.S. Fire Administration. He also has a master's degree from Waldorf University. He got married at the age of 31. He and his wife have four children ranging from seven to one with an even mix of two boys and two girls. He has competed in six tri-athlet races over the last three years. He recently started a new custom car business, Insatiable Auto Fab, with the motto never satisfied. He currently is enjoying wrenching on a 71 Nova and 68 C30 truck with his father-in-law. Thanks, Adam, for being on the podcast.

SPEAKER_01 2:45

So I thought that was important to dive in. I know I've put it on a little deep here at the beginning, but uh I think it'll play in well to our conversation.

SPEAKER_04 2:52

You know, that's great, man. It kind of gives the listeners a really good background uh of where you came from and things that you did. So we'll be able to tie all that in with this uh with this conversation, man.

SPEAKER_00 3:02

Well, it's funny, Adam, that you mentioned before we started recording that you've you've been listening to the show. And I mean, to be totally honest, most of the guests that we've had on have bios that read like that, right? They're they're being successful at work, they're being successful at home with multiple kids, they're being successful in the community, they've got these other hobbies and interests, and that's why they have, you know, that's why Jason and I have identified them as people with a winning mindset because they're winning at so many aspects of their life, right? And I think that's what you know, we're I believe the audience is is looking for that, right? We do the reason they're listening to a podcast about creating a winning mindset is because they want to hear from people like you. Hey, I'm doing it every day. I this is how you can do it too, right?

SPEAKER_01 3:54

Yeah, and I think that's a great point. And writing a bio, you know, makes me feel good because it realizes the things that I have done and the things that I have accomplished. And, you know, it's not always doesn't always feel that way. You know, you get in the trenches and you start working on something or something, you know, smacks you in the face as you're kind of pursuing whatever your goals are, and it's real easy to forget about all the success you have had and you beat yourself up a little bit. So yeah, I think it's it's nice for you know everyone to stop and take a moment and write down, you know, what their bio is because you kind of forget some of the stuff that you've done in life and you know, like the band stuff uh back in high school, you know, those were uh definitely formidable times in my life to really kind of set the stage for things. And I couldn't play a French ornamental to save my life if I tried today, but it was definitely part of my past, and I think an important part. So it's uh fun looking back for sure.

SPEAKER_04 4:48

No, it's good stuff, man. Hey, and you're talking about yourself, and that's exactly what the topic is this week. And so uh Kevin and I have talked at length about this topic of being yourself and how to overcome obstacles such as ignoring the spotlight effect or decreasing your social anxiety. Before we get into a deeper conversation on these things, Adam, let's first talk about the root of this week's discussions. You know, why do you believe it's important for someone to just simply be themselves?

SPEAKER_01 5:17

Well, first of all, you guys couldn't have picked a better guest for somebody to sit here and talk about themselves. So I'm privileged. Thank you. In all honesty, man, I'm glad to have this conversation because the reality is that uh, you know, it is important to be yourself, and you got to keep in mind all those different aspects of what makes you who you are and makes you, you know, the unique individual. And it's easy to kind of get your mindset on certain things. And I mentioned it kind of in the intro there. You know, I had some uh rough times in 2019. I went through a rough patch, and it's kind of silly if you look at it from the outside, but from the inside at that time, I was pursuing, you know, I want to be the fire chief in the organization that I work for. And I was kind of on that mission, I was on that path. And I'd always kind of my mindset, my winning mindset that I put out there was I'm gonna set a goal and then I'm gonna look at all the steps that it's gonna take to get there. And I'm just gonna grit through it and I'm gonna do what I have to do to get to achieve that goal. And so I did what I thought I was supposed to do. You know, you heard in the bio in 2012. I decided to go really recommit back into my career. At that time, I was a lieutenant for the department and I was running a upholstery business on the side, and I kind of for whatever reason I got motivated and I want to get really back into my career 100% on the fire department side. So I jumped back in, went back to school. I got that bachelor's degree in uh fire safety and technology, and then I went to the executive fire officer program and at the National Fire Academy, uh, and then ended up jumping into I was basically like check the boxes, what does it take to be a fire chief? And so in 2019, the opportunity came to promote up to another position, which was the assistant chief, so one step away from that fire chief role. And I thought for sure I was on the path to get that position, and um I didn't even get the opportunity to put in for the position. So they selected somebody at a at a lower rank and promoted them up to that position, and they hadn't, in my opinion, checked any of the boxes. So I really went through uh own, and it's not really about that now. What it is is it was a great learning opportunity, and I had to there was something there for me to take away and to learn from it, and that's what it took a while to see that. But at the end of the day, it was really challenged what my identity was and kind of my self-worth because at that time I felt pretty down. I thought, man, I did everything I thought I was supposed to do. What happened? How did things come off the track? And now who am I and where am I at? And life is kind of throws my whole plan off, you know, because I've always been a planner and this is what I'm gonna do and how I'm gonna pursue it. And with my other promotions, I always went after it hard 100%. And tested number one was the first one promoted out of the gate both times. So I had always had that success. And you always hear these athletes say, Hey, if you want to do it and you put your mind to it and you put in the effort, you can be a winner like me. You can be Tom Brady and hold all these, you know. And the reality is that's kind of dangerous advice, I think, for a lot of people, because you can put in all the work and you can do all the right things and still not work out. Um, you know, it makes me wonder about these athletes that train their whole, you know, lives going through high school and into college and they're dedicated. You know, my dream is to be Olympic gold medalist, and then they go to trials and they don't even make the trials to even be at the Olympics. More or less be last place at the Olympics, you know, you can get in. And that and the amount of time training that went into that is would be crazy. So, you know, it just makes me, you know, think about those things. So people just need to know like you could set the goals you want to, but just also know that don't tie your identity and self-worth to these titles and promotions and awards and you know, competitions.

SPEAKER_00 9:20

I'm I'm really glad you brought up self-worth, Adam. This is something that Jason and I hit on earlier this week. All week we've been talking about this winning mindset path to you know, when it comes to being yourself. Uh how much how does someone's self-worth affect them when they're trying to to grow into this winning mindset, you think?

SPEAKER_01 9:44

Yeah, for sure. It's all about how you feel about yourself and what narrative you create about yourself. So you spend a lot of time probably talking to yourself inside of your head about who you are and what you're trying to accomplish and where you find fulfillment at. And so really for me, it comes down to, you know, you got to find the things that interest you and really give you the really fuel you and drive you. And for me, you know, it's really coming down to, you know, some of the exercises I got to do going through some of my academic education was, you know, having to do exercises where you have to define your values, you know, what are your personal core values? And, you know, a couple of them that I ended up discovering in that process was uh curiosity. You know, I'm I'm driven, you know, I'm curious about different things. And that's why, you know, we talked a little bit before we dove into this. Was uh I commend you guys for sticking with this podcast so long because I'll do something for a couple weeks and then I feel like I got to jump onto something else because I'm curious. Oh, what about that? You know, hey, look, a squirrel over there, let's go check that out because I'm curious. And then vulnerability, you know, I think that's been one that I've kind of learned over the last few years is that it's okay to be vulnerable because if you're gonna be curious, you better be vulnerable because you're gonna jump into some arenas that you know nothing about and you're gonna not, you're gonna have to learn and you're not gonna be good at it at first. And so, you know, find something that you're good at and you can find that state of flow to where time just goes by and you don't even realize it. You're not really working at you're just enjoying it. And so I think those things all kind of lead into this identity piece and self-worth and kind of feeling good about yourself is because you're doing what you're really meant to do and what drives you.

SPEAKER_04 11:35

I think the easy thing here, Adam, is to go back to what you were saying at the very beginning of this after we talked about your bio. You suggested that when you were writing this, you felt good about all of the things that you've accomplished in your life, and that is going to give you more self-worth, right? Look at the things and all the trials and tribulations I've gone through. And and when I put it on paper, when I put pen to paper, it's like, gosh, you know what? I haven't been a total disaster in my life, you know. I've actually accomplished a lot of things. And I think for the most people out there, if they actually did that, if they put pen to paper and you know, created a bio, not everybody's gonna be on a podcaster, you know. But if you put pen to paper one day and you're like, gosh, look at all the things I have actually accomplished, I think it is going to give you more self-worth on feeling good about yourself and looking back and giving you some confidence and saying, you know what, if I've done this back then, look what I can do in the future. And I think your answer was really, really good there.

SPEAKER_01 12:34

Yeah, not relying on other people to give you that that feeling that you have accomplished something or relying on them, you know, you're just looking at, you know, what have you accomplished and what do you like to do and what have you done? And it doesn't have to be something that other people are proud of or whatever, or you know, gonna commend you for.

SPEAKER_00 12:53

I think I think your personal outlook on stuff is a is a big thing, and this is self-worth, and it's and it's also just being yourself. And I I what I really liked about what you said in the first answer, Adam, was you you took that the opportunity to learn and get better because you were trying to get promoted to being the assistant chief, and when that didn't happen for you, I think a lot of people fall back on the the blame game and and and the it's everything else, and they look at it as a negative. And I and I'm sure not getting the the even considered for the promotion what was a negative for you, but right now you're looking at all the stuff that you did to prepare for it as a positive because look at how much you learned, look at how much you grew, you know, like all those things are all positives, and no one's ever going to be able to take that away from you. And you know, it's just uh it it prepares you to do the next thing that you're gonna do, no matter what that is. So I I think that that just that outlook is is great.

SPEAKER_01 14:00

Yeah, I appreciate it. And trust me, for anybody listening to this, is that I went through all those normal reactions that you went through, and it w took a long time. This wasn't something I came to right away, you know. My first reaction was blame and being upset and you know, trying to figure out what went wrong and the relationships and all that, so it it wasn't uh this clean right at the beginning, but it took time for me to fall into this. But I thought it was important for my own well-being to work through that.

SPEAKER_04 14:31

Well, listen, let me ask you this, Adam. Many of us want to be accepted and liked from just about everyone we meet. We spoke on Maslow's hierarchy of needs this week and the social aspect of it. Because of our need to fulfill this social aspect, many of us get caught up in what others think of us. What is your advice to someone who's always in fear of what others may think of them and being accepted by their peers?

SPEAKER_01 14:56

So I think as far as advice, you know, the best thing I can say is that's human. You know, that's we're biologically innate to want to be accepted, and we want to be, you know, tribal and looking for our group. And uh, you know, I spend some time, I've read a bunch of books from Brene Brown. I've listened to her podcast. I don't know if you two are familiar, but uh, you know, she talks about uh, you know, your armor holding you back. And so I think a lot of times a lot of us spend an absorbent amount of time trying to put on a front of who you think you want to be and who you want other people to think you are instead of just being who you are, and you're putting up that armor because you are trying to be accepted by certain people in certain groups, and you know, for me, the reality is don't force it. There's so many different people out there and so many different groups. I mean, even if you just uh look on Facebook or these social medias where they have different groups, and there's a group for everything, you know, you can join all kinds of there's trade shows for everything, there's yeah, all kinds of things going on within even your own community with different groups and different people with different interests. And so it's you got to be a little bit uh vulnerable and put yourself out, but also if you don't fit with a group or you don't feel accepted with a group, move on to the next one, you know, and uh you'll find people that you fit with, and that's this that social connection is something that I think that we need. And I think the other thing is is you know, showing an interest in other people too, because people I find are generally most interested in themselves. And so when I'm looking to make connections, I just uh went to a conference out in Phoenix, I say just that was a year ago. Last March I went out to a conference, it was a uh basically custom car conference, a bunch of 12 volt uh mobile electronics uh people, installers and automotive upholstery people were out there. And I went out there by myself and went to this conference for three days, and I'm consider myself naturally an introvert, but I can push myself into the extrovert role for function, basically. And so I go out here and I'm kind of naturally my natural desire is like I'm just gonna hang out in my room and you know, watch a movie or something in the evenings, but instead push myself to go out to the bars or whatever and uh talk to people and not just sit at the bar by myself and have a drink. So I found that you know making making those social connections is people want to talk about themselves. So you just start asking them questions about themselves. And it's funny, I almost did uh my own social experiment, you know. I hate to say that because I want to advocate being uh authentic, you know, but I was kind of doing a little bit of social experiment while I was there because I was like, oh, this is interesting. I'll go talk to people and I'll just start asking things about them. And it's funny we'll have a 30-minute conversation with people, and at the end of it, we walk away and they never once asked me anything about myself, you know. I just asked them a bunch of questions. I just kept asking. We had this big conversation and they hardly learned anything about me, but it's because people like talking about themselves. And so if you're looking for that uh icebreaker, ask people about themselves. They're usually more than willing to talk about themselves, like I'm doing here. Yeah, it's good though, man.

SPEAKER_04 18:36

I like that. I mean, it plays a big part in that icebreaking and having conversations with people. Yeah, go ahead, Kev.

SPEAKER_00 18:41

Well, this goes along with what you just asked, Jason. But Adam, what is what's your advice on how to look past uh people who have who judge or perceive judgments of you and how you want to keep moving on your pathway moving forward?

SPEAKER_01 19:01

Yeah, I think it all just depends on you know what you want and kind of how you define your life and your expectations in it. And so worrying about what other people think, you know, there's a there's an element to it, like we talked about, where you want those social connections and you want to be accepted by people, but you also have to find the balance to where you actually find you're actually pursuing your own fulfillment, you know, the things that drive you, like we talked about earlier.

SPEAKER_04 19:29

I think one of the things we could talk about with this is the idea of how does people's perceived judgments control people's lives? Am I always doing the things that I think someone wants me to do because I think that they're judging me a certain way? And if I look at this topic, I feel like there's a lot of people out there who get employed with a certain employer or who become friends with a certain group who are always thinking that those people are judging them, maybe particular their bosses, even though their bosses have the right sometimes to kind of judge them on their performance. But I think then what happens is there's a manipulation within those people's heads that they become someone different than actually who they are. And we're talking about be yourself this week, but I'm now changing who I am to fit the profile of what I think these people want and what they're judging me on. So what's your thoughts on that, Adam?

SPEAKER_01 20:30

Yeah, for sure. You know, there is that piece, you know, at the end of the day, you know, that's really politics of organizations, and you know, you're trying to a lot of times it's vying for influence because you have the you have your own ideas and opinions of how things maybe should work or how things should go. So you're trying to be political to influence other people to try and carry your message, and so that's kind of what I went back to as well with the whole fire chief goal. You know, what was the whole point of it? And it never really was I wanted to have a fire chief title, it was that I wanted the influence because I felt that the organization could run better, and so I wanted to be able to have that influence. And so I think a lot of people fall under those pressures of those politics inside the organization of where you do try and manipulate so you follow the expectations so you can get people on board with what you're trying to do, and you get promoted and moved into positions where you get more influence and more capability. So, you know, it's definitely a tough trap to fall into. And, you know, uh, from my own experiences, it's just learning that there's a lot you can do from whatever level you are in the organization. And you know, I always tell people like that I've got people. On the job that are still firefighters that either have the same same seniority as me or even more seniority as me, and they always kind of beat themselves up. Oh man, you actually did something with your career, and I've just been a fireman or a paramedic, and you know, I don't feel that way at all about them. You know, it's uh everyone has a different role. It's just like whatever your role you're filling, but uh they're all equally important, if not the more important, the closer you get to the line work where you're actually making a difference on the streets. So yeah, it's it's one where I think people are just vying for that politics and influence. And I don't know that I've got good advice for how to avoid it outside of just finding fulfillment.

SPEAKER_04 22:42

Know it's coming, right? Just know it's coming.

SPEAKER_01 22:44

Yeah, and find fulfillment in whatever role that you're in at the moment and kind of live in that moment and not trying to always get to the next step and always putting on some kind of facade to try and fit in and vie for position.

SPEAKER_00 23:00

Adam, when you're doing something for the first time new, maybe teaching someone new, training someone new, managing or it uh public speaking, how do you get past like that fear and anxiety of what you when you think like what what is the audience thinking about you when you're giving when you're talking, right? Or giving a presentation or trying to teach somebody something new or train somebody?

SPEAKER_01 23:26

Yeah, this is good. So um I mentioned earlier that I'm naturally an introvert, and so that didn't come naturally for me. So I remember meetings we had when I promoted as a young lieutenant being in just an officer meeting with other uh employees, and I'd get all nervous when I started talking, my heart rate would start racing, my face would turn red, and I'd get all worked up about it. And the best advice that I ever got from somebody, and I forget exactly where it came from, but it stuck with me is uh, you know, the whole thing about uh people aren't caring about you, they're caring about what you have to say in those cases. So if you're teaching, they're trying to learn whatever you're trying to teach, they're trying to absorb it and learn it. They don't care about what you're doing, what you're wearing, if you stumble on your words or whatever. Um they just want to know what you have to say. And so I've always taken that. And when I get up in front of people or if I do an interview with the news or whatever, it's like people don't care about me, they care about what the message is. They don't care about you, they care about your story and what happened in your community or whatever when you go to share that stuff. So that's really what I took to heart. And when I focus on what I have to say in my message and I'm not focused on what everybody's thinking about me, I think it goes a whole lot better. And at the end of the day, you're your biggest critic when it comes to that stuff.

SPEAKER_04 24:46

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, heard that before. So, so Adam, let me let me go down this real quick. Where do you draw the line at being accepted and liked versus just being yourself and not giving a damn about what others think of you?

SPEAKER_01 25:00

So I'd say the biggest line is the one between external and internal. So I'll say I don't give a damn on the outside, but then on the inside I care. And that's the hardest part, and that's the biggest struggle that you'll end up having, is that, and I think that most people go through is that it's easy to say, I don't care, I'm just gonna be myself. But at the end of the day, you're human and you want to be accepted and part of the group. And so you do care. And so I know one of the uh an experience that comes to mind is when I went to the SEMA show this past year out in Las Vegas, so it's a custom car show, uh, one of the biggest ones that uh is held every year. And it's uh basically uh different builders come together, different aftermarket automotive businesses come together at a trade show. And so as a car builder, we end up seeing other car builders out there, and so I ended up running into a car builder that is uh has big social media presence and they're always winning a bunch of awards and everything. And I ended up seeing them at the show, and I went up to him and I was like, hey, what's up? You know, like I not really want to be a fanboy, but I'm like, hey, I know this person, I want to have a conversation with them. Hey, what's up? And I said hi to them, and then I started talking to them, and they were actually standing beside a car they built. So I start that conversation. Oh man, I love the console you built in this thing, you know. Tell me a little bit about it. And as I'm like getting this conversation started, they like look right over my shoulder and were like, Hey, Rob or whoever it is, and they're like, Oh, they bro five and hug and whatever, and then they start talking. I was like standing there, like, uh, this is kind of weird. Like, I really looked up to this person and I thought, like, oh man, how cool I get to meet him, chat with them. But then I felt really down right afterwards because I was like, oh, it went back to that identity and self-war thing again, where it was like, Oh, how did I think that I could talk to this person? I'm just an idiot, you know. It kind of goes into that self-talk, so you start feeling bad about yourself or whatever. But at the end of the day, it probably comes down to like they didn't mean to be rude to me, they just haven't seen Rob in forever. And Rob surprises them, hey, what's up, you know? And I just happen to be standing there starting to have a conversation. They don't know me from anybody, and so they did it. I don't think they meant to, but again, it comes back to I walk away, you know, I'm with my father-in-law or whatever, we're out there together, and it's easy for me to be like, ah man, I don't give a damn about what just happened. Forget that guy, you know. I might say something to that effect, and uh the reality is that inside I'm kind of burnt up about it and kind of feel bad about it for a little while. It takes me a little while to you have to recognize when that happens. I think that's probably the biggest piece of advice to give is you have to recognize when that happens. So your body, your brain naturally is gonna run through that for probably most of us. And you have to process it and identify, oh wait, I know what's happening here, you know. Um saying I don't care, but I really do care, and why do I care? And what is the narrative I'm telling myself? Oh, I'm not worthy of this person's attention, but is that really what happened, or am I creating this whole narrative?

SPEAKER_04 28:29

Yeah, you you you're exactly right because when you when you went back to look at it again, this guy was just running into Rob, who he hadn't seen in a while, right? It wasn't because Adam isn't worth anything, it's because he hadn't seen Rob in a while, but you created that narrative in your head. So getting back on that winning path mindset path is to be like, no, it wasn't me. I didn't have the issue. It was just him not seeing Rob in a while, and I'm actually uh a pretty good dude.

SPEAKER_00 28:58

And I think it goes back to the stuff we were talking about earlier, right? I mean, I think it's okay to feel the you know the way in these certain situations, but you you can't dwell on it, you can't let it just eat away at you so that you can't accomplish the things that you want to accomplish, right? Like you had goal, you have goals, uh, even if it's something like a car show, right? Like you have goals about going to the car show, you can't let the fact that this one interaction you can't let it ruin all the other goals that you had set for yourself for attending the car show, right? I mean, because this is something that you attend professionally, right? So it's not like it's just a thing that you went to and didn't have a great experience. Like you have other reasons to be there, and you got to get over it and move on and and start thinking about you and and doing what Adam needs to do to be the best at the car show, right? Not about what this other guy did or said or didn't say or whatever, you know.

SPEAKER_01 29:56

And that's what's crazy. I mean, you pointed out is that one thing that happened, and that's what's crazy. If I actually stop and think about it, there were probably 20 other interactions that were very similar that all went really well. And I got to meet people and have great conversations with them, but at the end of the night, the one that I remembered was the one I got, I felt like I got burned on, and that's the one you dwell on. It's so funny how we do that is that you could have all this great stuff happen, and then one bad thing happens, and your brain just can't turn it off and get over the one bad thing, and you just uh that's the thing that's just comes to the forefront for whatever reason.

SPEAKER_04 30:36

That's a good point, man. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:39

Well, Adam, as we as we wrap up the episode, uh give the listeners any last-minute advice, anything for for the listeners out there that are trying to create a winning mindset by being true to themselves.

SPEAKER_01 30:52

Nice. I think the best thing is to allow yourself to be inspired by others. You know, there's other people out here, you know, like you guys doing podcasts, there's uh influencers on, you know, YouTube, there's different people throwing up all kinds of stuff on uh Instagram, and I follow a bunch of stuff, you know, in the custom car world and auto upholstery, and there's always people out there doing it better than you are. And you it's okay that they're doing better. I think it's good that you're that you watch that stuff and uh you follow it, but at the same time I think it can be a little toxic sometimes. So it's fun to see all the stuff, and I think it's a nice challenge because you see how well people are doing and the things that they're able to achieve. But uh also I think it puts a lot of we can put a lot of pressure on ourselves and then we can get down on ourselves and we see others being what we perceive as so successful, and then we feel uh in our moment how we're struggling, but you know, what's put out there online is not necessarily exactly the whole story, and trying to see that and trying to gain, you know, spend that time trying to gain mastery and some different stuff. And really, uh what I've always gone back to is you know, enjoy the journey, you know, it's not always about it's not about just the destination. And so that's what I found with a lot of my even academic pursuits is I had a blast really going through most of my schoolwork. I know a lot of people uh have kind of the opposite experience. We're like, oh, let's just get this over with and get the degree and get out of here. But I found it the opposite. I actually enjoyed, but I did things that I liked. I didn't go back to college until I was like 31. I think 31, I went to college as like a four-year degree pursuit. And uh I think that was good because at that time I was I know what I want to do, I know what interests me. So when I went to school, I went to people with that were like-minded. I was in my tribe and I enjoyed it and I had a good time. There were times where I had, you know, I didn't like writing 10-page papers or whatever, but I enjoyed the interaction and the social connections. And I found I thought at the time while I was in it, and when I signed up, I wanted the degree. I didn't care about the path to get there. Just whatever the fastest and cheapest path is, let's get it done. And uh at when it was over, I thought I would feel this giant uh sense of satisfaction. Like, oh, it's done. I achieved it, I'm at the summit. Ta-da! And I really just found like, oh, that's it. That's what it feels like when I'm done. I uh what's next? And that's why I end up going from one thing to the next to the next to the next, and that's I'm still doing that. It's just not in the academic realm, but it's with some different business ventures and entrepreneurship or whatever. But it's really about what's next. I'm still here, I'm still living and breathing, let's go. Uh check that off, but I'm ready for something else. So it's really the journey, it's all the steps through it, and it's not these big goals and destinations. So enjoy it.

SPEAKER_04 33:57

Yeah, it's good, it's good advice, man. I think we do get caught up uh in the moment sometimes, um, trying to look at the the outcome, the final destination, and we don't end up having clarity on what the path is and how much fun that can actually be. So, really, really good insight there, man. Well, listen, unfortunately, that's gonna wrap it up. So that's it for be yourself part three. We want to thank Adam Howard for coming on and giving us his insight on why it's important to be yourself. Adam, thanks again for uh just really digging in deep onto this topic, man. It's been a lot of fun. Appreciate it.

SPEAKER_01 34:31

Yeah, thank you guys for having me. Appreciate it.

SPEAKER_04 34:33

Yeah, so uh check this out. Uh obviously, we've got stuff coming out in the future. Please make sure you subscribe to the podcast and rate and review the podcast as it helps get the podcast out to more listeners. We'll be back in better than ever on Monday for a brand new episode. And as always, if you're impacting or influencing one person in a day, it is worth it. Everyone has 10 minutes to learn a winning mindset. Thanks again, Adam.

SPEAKER_03 34:56

Thanks for taking the time to create a winning mindset. Remember, we'll release a new episode every Monday. So be sure to start your week off right by listening to 10 to win. Please subscribe, like, comment, and share our podcast. And remember, if you're impacting or influencing one person a day, it's worth it. Everyone has 10 minutes to create a winning mindset.