{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":7.08,"endTime":11.76,"body":"Welcome back. We'll"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":7.08,"endTime":11.76,"body":"come back late now to another"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":11.76,"endTime":15.09,"body":"episode of till the wheels fall"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":11.76,"endTime":15.09,"body":"off. I'm Matt. I'm paying and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":15.09,"endTime":18.48,"body":"I'm trying to wake you up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":15.09,"endTime":18.48,"body":"because we are tired, y'all."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":18.51,"endTime":22.32,"body":"Yes, we have just experienced a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":18.51,"endTime":22.32,"body":"May. Simba This is releasing on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":22.32,"endTime":27.18,"body":"the last day of May 31. and good"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":22.32,"endTime":27.18,"body":"riddance, May, you will not be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":27.18,"endTime":32.19,"body":"missed. This month has been just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":27.18,"endTime":32.19,"body":"freaking crazy for us. Yeah, non"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":32.19,"endTime":36.24,"body":"stop with the activities. School"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":32.19,"endTime":36.24,"body":"is coming to an end. And it was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":36.24,"endTime":39.03,"body":"like the there was a kids party"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":36.24,"endTime":39.03,"body":"every other day it felt like and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":39.03,"endTime":42.48,"body":"then they graduate kids at every"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":39.03,"endTime":42.48,"body":"grade level grade level, it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":42.48,"endTime":46.44,"body":"feels like, Oh, you're going to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":42.48,"endTime":46.44,"body":"third to fourth grade. Do that."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":46.44,"endTime":49.92,"body":"It wasn't that bad. But it felt"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":46.44,"endTime":49.92,"body":"that way. fifth to sixth grade,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":49.92,"endTime":53.19,"body":"there definitely was a thing."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":49.92,"endTime":53.19,"body":"And yeah, and then the end of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":53.19,"endTime":57.72,"body":"year parties and then baseball"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":53.19,"endTime":57.72,"body":"and then dance recitals and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":58.26,"endTime":62.61,"body":"everything in between. So let's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":58.26,"endTime":62.61,"body":"just say that this recording"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":62.61,"endTime":65.85,"body":"we're very disciplined today we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":62.61,"endTime":65.85,"body":"are practicing discipline"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":65.85,"endTime":70.05,"body":"because Yeah, neither one of us"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":65.85,"endTime":70.05,"body":"felt like talking. Right now"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":70.05,"endTime":72.87,"body":"we're just staring each other at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":70.05,"endTime":72.87,"body":"the dinner table. Like these"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":72.9,"endTime":77.34,"body":"cold eyes like wanna, man? Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":72.9,"endTime":77.34,"body":"we agreed to do this. And we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":77.34,"endTime":80.25,"body":"here. Yes. And I think we've got"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":77.34,"endTime":80.25,"body":"an awesome message to provide as"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":80.25,"endTime":83.28,"body":"well. I hope so the listener"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":80.25,"endTime":83.28,"body":"will appreciate that. We"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":83.28,"endTime":87.6,"body":"practiced our discipline muscles"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":83.28,"endTime":87.6,"body":"today we exercised. Okay, well"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":87.6,"endTime":90.48,"body":"with our brain muscles in our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":87.6,"endTime":90.48,"body":"bodies, because we worked out to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":90.87,"endTime":93.93,"body":"we did work out today, which I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":90.87,"endTime":93.93,"body":"didn't even know if I'd get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":93.93,"endTime":94.47,"body":"around to."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":95.88,"endTime":97.95,"body":"I was up until two in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":95.88,"endTime":97.95,"body":"morning last night watching the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":97.95,"endTime":102.51,"body":"new avatar movie. Yeah, I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":97.95,"endTime":102.51,"body":"know. I heard some screaming and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":102.51,"endTime":106.5,"body":"I'm like, it scared the crap out"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":102.51,"endTime":106.5,"body":"of some crazy sea monster. It"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":106.5,"endTime":108.78,"body":"was one of the Avatar thing I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":106.5,"endTime":108.78,"body":"didn't even know you were"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":108.78,"endTime":111.9,"body":"watching it. I crashed. I was in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":108.78,"endTime":111.9,"body":"the mood for sci fi last night."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":111.9,"endTime":114.15,"body":"And I was like, You know what?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":111.9,"endTime":114.15,"body":"That's weird. I know, it was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":114.15,"endTime":117.45,"body":"random and like a huge sci fi"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":114.15,"endTime":117.45,"body":"guy, but I'm in the mood for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":117.45,"endTime":120.15,"body":"something weird. Yeah, I've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":117.45,"endTime":120.15,"body":"turned it on. And it turns it on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":120.15,"endTime":122.79,"body":"way too late into long movie,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":120.15,"endTime":122.79,"body":"but it's good. It's like three"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":122.79,"endTime":126.12,"body":"hours long. And so it's like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":122.79,"endTime":126.12,"body":"I'm gonna have to finish it. I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":126.15,"endTime":129.06,"body":"just I'm captivated. Now. I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":126.15,"endTime":129.06,"body":"invested. I'm gonna have to stay"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":129.06,"endTime":133.14,"body":"up. I don't know how you stay up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":129.06,"endTime":133.14,"body":"and watch movies all the way"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":133.14,"endTime":136.83,"body":"through. I don't watch movies"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":133.14,"endTime":136.83,"body":"all the way through. i It takes"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":136.83,"endTime":138.42,"body":"me like three days to watch it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":140.7,"endTime":142.35,"body":"I don't know. I just like to get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":140.7,"endTime":142.35,"body":"it done."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":143.97,"endTime":146.85,"body":"Are we married? I don't know."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":143.97,"endTime":146.85,"body":"Yeah, they say in a marriage."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":146.85,"endTime":149.94,"body":"There are two types of people."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":146.85,"endTime":149.94,"body":"There's one person that is going"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":149.94,"endTime":153.72,"body":"to bed at 10pm the other? Who's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":149.94,"endTime":153.72,"body":"asking Okay, so what are we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":153.72,"endTime":155.82,"body":"doing tonight? Oh my god."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":153.72,"endTime":155.82,"body":"Somehow these people get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":155.82,"endTime":160.53,"body":"married. You can relate. Give us"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":155.82,"endTime":160.53,"body":"a shout out. I'm sure a lot of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":160.53,"endTime":164.13,"body":"people do. Yep. All right. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":160.53,"endTime":164.13,"body":"today we are talking about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":164.13,"endTime":168.45,"body":"living without rules. So that's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":164.13,"endTime":168.45,"body":"so weird. For me. This is a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":168.45,"endTime":171.87,"body":"topic for Paige that has been I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":168.45,"endTime":171.87,"body":"don't know what 30 Something"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":171.87,"endTime":176.1,"body":"years in the making. Yeah. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":171.87,"endTime":176.1,"body":"our our personalities are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":176.1,"endTime":179.25,"body":"extremely different. I have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":176.1,"endTime":179.25,"body":"always been someone that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":179.25,"endTime":182.49,"body":"questioned the rules, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":179.25,"endTime":182.49,"body":"questioned rules. From the time"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":182.49,"endTime":185.79,"body":"that I was first told what a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":182.49,"endTime":185.79,"body":"rule was. You could ask my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":185.79,"endTime":187.74,"body":"mother and she would tell me"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":185.79,"endTime":187.74,"body":"when I was three years old. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":187.74,"endTime":192.0,"body":"was arguing about rules and the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":187.74,"endTime":192.0,"body":"validity of the rules. And where"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":192.0,"endTime":194.43,"body":"did this rule come from? And is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":192.0,"endTime":194.43,"body":"this really necessary? And does"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":194.43,"endTime":197.85,"body":"this apply to me? That was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":194.43,"endTime":197.85,"body":"always me. And I married"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":197.85,"endTime":201.9,"body":"somebody who you could you could"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":197.85,"endTime":201.9,"body":"create a rule didn't matter how"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":201.93,"endTime":204.99,"body":"arbitrary and she would follow"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":201.93,"endTime":204.99,"body":"it because someone put enough"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":204.99,"endTime":207.6,"body":"thought into it to make it a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":204.99,"endTime":207.6,"body":"rule. Yeah, I don't cross the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":207.6,"endTime":211.35,"body":"street. Whatever. Holy crap."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":207.6,"endTime":211.35,"body":"That's right. That's I was gonna"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":211.35,"endTime":214.86,"body":"go I was like, oh, when we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":211.35,"endTime":214.86,"body":"travel, we all we go out of town"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":214.86,"endTime":217.44,"body":"to a big city, usually big"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":214.86,"endTime":217.44,"body":"cities where you have to respect"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":217.44,"endTime":220.32,"body":"the crosswalks. But even not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":217.44,"endTime":220.32,"body":"even big cities. We could be in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":220.32,"endTime":223.2,"body":"like, downtown where we live,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":220.32,"endTime":223.2,"body":"which is like a sleepy little"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":223.2,"endTime":228.06,"body":"town. If that crosswalk says"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":223.2,"endTime":228.06,"body":"don't walk, and there's not a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":228.06,"endTime":232.11,"body":"car for miles on either side."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":228.06,"endTime":232.11,"body":"She moved in y'all I've crossed"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":232.11,"endTime":235.71,"body":"more streets, and then turned"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":232.11,"endTime":235.71,"body":"around to see her just giving me"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":235.71,"endTime":239.01,"body":"a nasty look from the other side"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":235.71,"endTime":239.01,"body":"of the street. Because I broke"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":239.01,"endTime":243.42,"body":"be fair, you almost killed our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":239.01,"endTime":243.42,"body":"family. I was gonna hit one time"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":243.42,"endTime":247.59,"body":"by doing that one time, so I got"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":243.42,"endTime":247.59,"body":"pretty good success. The rules"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":247.59,"endTime":251.58,"body":"are important. I think that's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":247.59,"endTime":251.58,"body":"the gist of the discussion today"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":251.58,"endTime":255.3,"body":"is that rules are important."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":251.58,"endTime":255.3,"body":"Sometimes."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":256.47,"endTime":259.65,"body":"Sometimes in the situation, they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":256.47,"endTime":259.65,"body":"are manmade, right? They are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":259.65,"endTime":263.76,"body":"manmade, and rules do serve a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":259.65,"endTime":263.76,"body":"purpose in life. They keep us"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":263.76,"endTime":266.67,"body":"safe from harm. Most rules are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":263.76,"endTime":266.67,"body":"designed to keep us safe from"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":266.67,"endTime":267.87,"body":"harm. I think of rules like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":269.31,"endTime":272.49,"body":"actually, red light. I'm having"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":269.31,"endTime":272.49,"body":"trouble now. Yeah, red lights,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":272.52,"endTime":276.0,"body":"red lights keep us safe from"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":272.52,"endTime":276.0,"body":"harm. It keeps traffic coming up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":276.0,"endTime":278.52,"body":"with things tonight. What's up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":276.0,"endTime":278.52,"body":"with that? Oh, no, I thought I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":278.52,"endTime":281.22,"body":"was gonna have to carry it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":278.52,"endTime":281.22,"body":"because if y'all can see her if"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":281.22,"endTime":284.76,"body":"you're watching us on YouTube,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":281.22,"endTime":284.76,"body":"or maybe an IG clip, y'all she's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":284.76,"endTime":288.78,"body":"gone. I am. Um, I don't even"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":284.76,"endTime":288.78,"body":"have makeup on or anything. I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":288.78,"endTime":292.11,"body":"just like, I'm just here like a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":288.78,"endTime":292.11,"body":"zombie came from the baseball"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":292.11,"endTime":295.44,"body":"field straight in here. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":292.11,"endTime":295.44,"body":"yeah, you're done with some"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":295.44,"endTime":297.87,"body":"other rules that are designed to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":295.44,"endTime":297.87,"body":"keep us safe that serve a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":297.87,"endTime":299.97,"body":"purpose. We can all agree Okay,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":297.87,"endTime":299.97,"body":"that's it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":300.0,"endTime":303.84,"body":"That's a valid rule, driving on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":300.0,"endTime":303.84,"body":"the right side of the road, or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":303.84,"endTime":306.75,"body":"the left side. But yes, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":303.84,"endTime":306.75,"body":"we're all gonna drive on one"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":306.75,"endTime":309.51,"body":"side of the road, right? A lot"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":306.75,"endTime":309.51,"body":"of traffic laws are set up."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":309.54,"endTime":312.6,"body":"Okay, so these are laws, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":309.54,"endTime":312.6,"body":"what about like rules? You know,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":312.6,"endTime":312.96,"body":"like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":315.78,"endTime":319.41,"body":"no talking in class that doesn't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":315.78,"endTime":319.41,"body":"keep you safe. But what does it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":319.41,"endTime":322.5,"body":"do? Keep saying structured and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":319.41,"endTime":322.5,"body":"it keeps the environment calm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":322.5,"endTime":326.13,"body":"for learning. Okay, I suppose."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":322.5,"endTime":326.13,"body":"No talking class. But does that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":326.13,"endTime":330.69,"body":"mean you never talk in class?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":326.13,"endTime":330.69,"body":"No, no. What we're talking about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":330.69,"endTime":333.54,"body":"today, this, this, this topic"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":330.69,"endTime":333.54,"body":"has come to us from people that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":333.54,"endTime":337.65,"body":"we've worked with, and what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":333.54,"endTime":337.65,"body":"we've observed. The wide"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":337.68,"endTime":341.7,"body":"variance experience a lot of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":337.68,"endTime":341.7,"body":"study. Yeah, for sure. I've had"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":341.7,"endTime":346.8,"body":"to have a total mind shift. Just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":341.7,"endTime":346.8,"body":"so y'all know. Yeah. Well, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":346.8,"endTime":349.98,"body":"can't wait to hear your story"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":346.8,"endTime":349.98,"body":"about coming to terms with this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":350.01,"endTime":355.02,"body":"rule thing. But Paige has always"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":350.01,"endTime":355.02,"body":"looked at rules as almost like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":355.05,"endTime":357.93,"body":"carved in stone 10 commandment"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":355.05,"endTime":357.93,"body":"type things. And it doesn't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":357.93,"endTime":362.76,"body":"matter where we are. If there's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":357.93,"endTime":362.76,"body":"a rule, she will respect it no"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":362.79,"endTime":369.36,"body":"matter what you used to use to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":362.79,"endTime":369.36,"body":"Okay, use two rules. Give me"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":369.36,"endTime":372.84,"body":"some props here. I'm giving you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":369.36,"endTime":372.84,"body":"props. All right, you've come so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":372.84,"endTime":376.77,"body":"far, you've done some incredible"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":372.84,"endTime":376.77,"body":"things. But I'd still like him"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":376.77,"endTime":379.74,"body":"for the day when you cross the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":376.77,"endTime":379.74,"body":"street with me. I do it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":379.74,"endTime":383.82,"body":"sometimes. Every so often."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":379.74,"endTime":383.82,"body":"You're like, and you know, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":383.82,"endTime":387.66,"body":"feel guilty when you do it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":383.82,"endTime":387.66,"body":"Maybe, like, what do you think's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":387.66,"endTime":390.12,"body":"gonna happen or I feel"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":387.66,"endTime":390.12,"body":"empowered, sometimes I do it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":390.12,"endTime":394.02,"body":"And I'm like, Ah, it wasn't so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":390.12,"endTime":394.02,"body":"bad. I made a decision today."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":394.05,"endTime":399.21,"body":"But the point is that rules are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":394.05,"endTime":399.21,"body":"not the end all be all to life."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":399.54,"endTime":402.84,"body":"Yeah, some rules are obvious."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":399.54,"endTime":402.84,"body":"And you can look them up."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":402.87,"endTime":405.66,"body":"They're written on posters,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":402.87,"endTime":405.66,"body":"they're posted on signs. They're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":405.99,"endTime":409.38,"body":"presented to us on our first day"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":405.99,"endTime":409.38,"body":"of school, or you're yawning"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":409.41,"endTime":414.24,"body":"don't make me yawn too. But they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":409.41,"endTime":414.24,"body":"are created by people. Remember"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":414.24,"endTime":417.18,"body":"this, they are created by other"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":414.24,"endTime":417.18,"body":"people just like you and me."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":417.93,"endTime":422.1,"body":"Just like us, these aren't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":417.93,"endTime":422.1,"body":"special people always use my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":422.1,"endTime":427.29,"body":"ears, sorry, rules. highly"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":422.1,"endTime":427.29,"body":"sensitive person who are very"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":427.29,"endTime":430.86,"body":"highly sensitive, right? And I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":427.29,"endTime":430.86,"body":"ruining her by. Okay. But rules"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":430.86,"endTime":434.64,"body":"are not definite no. And they do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":430.86,"endTime":434.64,"body":"not dictate the terms of our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":434.64,"endTime":438.75,"body":"lives. And they don't always"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":434.64,"endTime":438.75,"body":"apply to us a controversial"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":438.75,"endTime":443.49,"body":"thought. They don't always apply"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":438.75,"endTime":443.49,"body":"to us. There's a gray area, when"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":443.49,"endTime":447.0,"body":"it comes to some rules, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":443.49,"endTime":447.0,"body":"especially those that we made"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":447.0,"endTime":450.42,"body":"for ourselves or that others"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":447.0,"endTime":450.42,"body":"have made for us like these"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":450.45,"endTime":454.68,"body":"unwritten rules, I guess you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":450.45,"endTime":454.68,"body":"could say, you know, so think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":454.68,"endTime":457.77,"body":"back to when you were young, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":454.68,"endTime":457.77,"body":"the world was your oyster, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":457.77,"endTime":460.98,"body":"you're being asked in fifth"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":457.77,"endTime":460.98,"body":"grade, what you want to be when"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":460.98,"endTime":465.81,"body":"you grow up, you can have any"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":460.98,"endTime":465.81,"body":"answer you want. At some point,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":465.81,"endTime":470.58,"body":"we lose that curiosity about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":465.81,"endTime":470.58,"body":"life, and we lose that, that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":470.58,"endTime":474.66,"body":"wonder and that thought about,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":470.58,"endTime":474.66,"body":"what could it be, I could be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":474.66,"endTime":477.42,"body":"anything I want, I could do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":474.66,"endTime":477.42,"body":"anything I want. At some point,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":477.42,"endTime":482.01,"body":"I guess we get cemented in our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":477.42,"endTime":482.01,"body":"routines, and in our roles that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":482.01,"endTime":485.73,"body":"sometimes society is put there,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":482.01,"endTime":485.73,"body":"or we've placed on ourselves."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":485.91,"endTime":489.87,"body":"And we feel like we're boxed in."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":485.91,"endTime":489.87,"body":"Like, why can't you get a tattoo"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":489.87,"endTime":493.95,"body":"sleeve? Even though you're on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":489.87,"endTime":493.95,"body":"the parent teacher organization?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":494.43,"endTime":499.35,"body":"Why? Like what what's that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":494.43,"endTime":499.35,"body":"about? PTO stands for PTO? Yeah."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":499.8,"endTime":502.35,"body":"Yeah, parent teacher"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":499.8,"endTime":502.35,"body":"organization used to be PTA, the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":502.35,"endTime":506.07,"body":"parent teacher. Organization"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":502.35,"endTime":506.07,"body":"more often. Now, I don't know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":506.07,"endTime":508.05,"body":"what led to that shift. But I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":506.07,"endTime":508.05,"body":"sure it was a stupid rule."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":509.43,"endTime":512.31,"body":"Who says you can't have a nose"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":509.43,"endTime":512.31,"body":"piercing? Like when you're 35?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":512.31,"endTime":516.0,"body":"Like, some of these things are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":512.31,"endTime":516.0,"body":"becoming more acceptable, but a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":516.0,"endTime":519.39,"body":"rainbow Hey, just I want you to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":516.0,"endTime":519.39,"body":"ask yourself the question. Are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":519.39,"endTime":524.46,"body":"you living for rules? Or are you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":519.39,"endTime":524.46,"body":"living from your heart? And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":524.46,"endTime":528.57,"body":"let's discuss the gray area in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":524.46,"endTime":528.57,"body":"between the rules. And Paige and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":528.57,"endTime":530.67,"body":"I were talking about this before"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":528.57,"endTime":530.67,"body":"the episode started. She was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":530.67,"endTime":533.55,"body":"like, you know, Wouldn't it be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":530.67,"endTime":533.55,"body":"easier? If you just had two"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":533.55,"endTime":534.69,"body":"choices all the time?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":535.71,"endTime":539.07,"body":"Like if life were black and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":535.71,"endTime":539.07,"body":"white? Yeah. And I guess"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":539.07,"endTime":541.8,"body":"underlying this entire"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":539.07,"endTime":541.8,"body":"discussion is this cognitive"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":541.8,"endTime":544.44,"body":"distortion that we've we've had"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":541.8,"endTime":544.44,"body":"a whole episode on this called"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":544.44,"endTime":548.7,"body":"All or nothing, all or nothing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":544.44,"endTime":548.7,"body":"thinking it's either all this or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":548.7,"endTime":552.9,"body":"all that there's no gray area in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":548.7,"endTime":552.9,"body":"between the two. And it leads to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":553.47,"endTime":556.23,"body":"actions that can be harmful for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":553.47,"endTime":556.23,"body":"yourself or for people around"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":556.23,"endTime":558.42,"body":"you. Because you've just you've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":556.23,"endTime":558.42,"body":"drawn a line in the sand. You're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":558.42,"endTime":561.0,"body":"like, I'm just going to do this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":558.42,"endTime":561.0,"body":"because this is this is the way"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":561.0,"endTime":564.06,"body":"it is this is what I've agreed"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":561.0,"endTime":564.06,"body":"to do. And for no other reason,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":564.06,"endTime":566.52,"body":"with no common sense with no"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":564.06,"endTime":566.52,"body":"thought behind it. I'm just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":566.52,"endTime":569.34,"body":"going to keep doing this. Or it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":566.52,"endTime":569.34,"body":"can it's it's thinking in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":569.34,"endTime":571.35,"body":"extremes. So it's like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":572.67,"endTime":576.03,"body":"I can't be on a diet because"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":572.67,"endTime":576.03,"body":"that means I can never eat sugar"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":576.06,"endTime":579.42,"body":"again for the rest of my life."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":576.06,"endTime":579.42,"body":"That's all or nothing thinking."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":579.45,"endTime":584.28,"body":"Yeah. And, like I'm, I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":579.45,"endTime":584.28,"body":"mean to demean this. And I know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":584.28,"endTime":587.19,"body":"that some people suffer from"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":584.28,"endTime":587.19,"body":"this and it's debilitating for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":587.19,"endTime":591.03,"body":"them. But it is it is insane in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":587.19,"endTime":591.03,"body":"a lot of ways, right to look at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":591.03,"endTime":594.63,"body":"life in these absolutes and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":591.03,"endTime":594.63,"body":"these extremes, it's crazy, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":594.87,"endTime":597.54,"body":"it's at the root of a lot of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":594.87,"endTime":597.54,"body":"relationship troubles. It's a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":597.57,"endTime":598.32,"body":"root of a lot of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":599.49,"endTime":599.97,"body":"toxic"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":600.0,"endTime":603.09,"body":"relationships with your job or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":600.0,"endTime":603.09,"body":"with your kids or with people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":603.09,"endTime":608.07,"body":"around you. It's just it can be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":603.09,"endTime":608.07,"body":"really bad for you. Yeah. So we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":608.07,"endTime":611.13,"body":"were talking about it. She's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":608.07,"endTime":611.13,"body":"like it just be so much easier."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":611.13,"endTime":614.19,"body":"Now, why do you think that is?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":611.13,"endTime":614.19,"body":"And bring me back to the way"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":614.19,"endTime":617.61,"body":"that you used to think why is it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":614.19,"endTime":617.61,"body":"simpler? Why is it simpler to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":617.61,"endTime":620.85,"body":"look at it either one way or the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":617.61,"endTime":620.85,"body":"other? It just because I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":620.85,"endTime":623.64,"body":"have any other options to look"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":620.85,"endTime":623.64,"body":"at. I'm just thinking that I'd"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":623.64,"endTime":627.18,"body":"see they're going to be this way"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":623.64,"endTime":627.18,"body":"or that way. And that's simple."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":627.21,"endTime":631.74,"body":"So in that art, is that correct"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":627.21,"endTime":631.74,"body":"me if I'm wrong, but are you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":631.74,"endTime":635.07,"body":"okay with other people making"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":631.74,"endTime":635.07,"body":"decisions for you? Because it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":635.07,"endTime":638.16,"body":"requires very little personal"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":635.07,"endTime":638.16,"body":"touch to your thoughts and your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":638.16,"endTime":642.03,"body":"decisions. When you only have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":638.16,"endTime":642.03,"body":"two choices. That's always been"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":642.03,"endTime":644.25,"body":"my beef with politics in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":642.03,"endTime":644.25,"body":"general. I know exactly."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":644.25,"endTime":647.28,"body":"Politics. No, but that's the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":644.25,"endTime":647.28,"body":"thing. Like you go to McDonald's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":647.28,"endTime":651.27,"body":"and you have 30 options for a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":647.28,"endTime":651.27,"body":"burger. And when I'm voting for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":651.48,"endTime":653.94,"body":"people that are gonna represent"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":651.48,"endTime":653.94,"body":"us, I get two choices. You could"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":653.94,"endTime":657.21,"body":"call it three, but the three"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":653.94,"endTime":657.21,"body":"really count. Yeah, you know, so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":657.21,"endTime":660.27,"body":"is it just simpler for you? Or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":657.21,"endTime":660.27,"body":"is it you just don't want to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":660.27,"endTime":662.55,"body":"think about it. I don't want to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":660.27,"endTime":662.55,"body":"think about it. It makes me"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":662.55,"endTime":665.46,"body":"think of like when we went to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":662.55,"endTime":665.46,"body":"Panera Bread and you ordered"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":665.49,"endTime":669.39,"body":"avocado toast. Oh, storytime. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":665.49,"endTime":669.39,"body":"they didn't have avocado toast"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":669.39,"endTime":672.87,"body":"on the menu. But Matt wants"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":669.39,"endTime":672.87,"body":"avocado toast. And he's like you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":672.87,"endTime":676.26,"body":"have avocado. Yeah. Well, do you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":672.87,"endTime":676.26,"body":"have toast? Yeah, then you have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":676.26,"endTime":678.66,"body":"avocado toast charged me for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":676.26,"endTime":678.66,"body":"both. I don't care how you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":678.66,"endTime":681.48,"body":"charge me just make me some damn"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":678.66,"endTime":681.48,"body":"avocado toast. It was pretty"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":681.48,"endTime":685.47,"body":"hilarious. So it was great. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":681.48,"endTime":685.47,"body":"it wasn't rude about it either."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":685.5,"endTime":689.58,"body":"No, no, you were awesome about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":685.5,"endTime":689.58,"body":"it. It was really good. 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Right?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":714.6,"endTime":717.78,"body":"I just really need some avocado"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":717.78,"endTime":720.63,"body":"toast in my belly right now."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":717.78,"endTime":720.63,"body":"Yeah. And they figured it out."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":720.66,"endTime":722.94,"body":"Yeah, they had the ingredient"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":720.66,"endTime":722.94,"body":"that does? That's a very good"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":722.94,"endTime":725.28,"body":"example of what we're talking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":722.94,"endTime":725.28,"body":"about. Okay. I like that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":725.28,"endTime":728.34,"body":"example. I forgotten about it,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":725.28,"endTime":728.34,"body":"too. And then you just clicked"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":728.37,"endTime":731.58,"body":"that always cracks me up. Okay."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":728.37,"endTime":731.58,"body":"So behind it all is that it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":731.58,"endTime":734.07,"body":"easier for you because you don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":731.58,"endTime":734.07,"body":"have to put any personal thought"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":734.07,"endTime":737.79,"body":"into the decision. Yeah. Which"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":734.07,"endTime":737.79,"body":"is difficult, like, let's be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":737.79,"endTime":741.48,"body":"real about it, it is taxing on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":737.79,"endTime":741.48,"body":"the mind to have to think about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":741.48,"endTime":744.18,"body":"what's right all the time, like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":741.48,"endTime":744.18,"body":"what's right for us. 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But we've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":775.41,"endTime":779.04,"body":"decided, as a whole that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":779.37,"endTime":782.22,"body":"following these guidelines is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":779.37,"endTime":782.22,"body":"better. And so just do what I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":782.22,"endTime":786.3,"body":"say. Forget about personal"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":782.22,"endTime":786.3,"body":"thought, just do this is gonna"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":786.3,"endTime":789.09,"body":"make it smoother has will make"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":786.3,"endTime":789.09,"body":"everything smoother if you just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":789.09,"endTime":792.06,"body":"do it this way. Yeah, we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":789.09,"endTime":792.06,"body":"taught to obey these manmade"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":792.06,"endTime":794.79,"body":"rules, no matter what. Yes. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":792.06,"endTime":794.79,"body":"so back to the intro. We're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":794.79,"endTime":797.37,"body":"talking about living from your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":794.79,"endTime":797.37,"body":"heart. I want to challenge"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":797.67,"endTime":802.11,"body":"everyone to consider what that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":797.67,"endTime":802.11,"body":"means for you. And look at your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":802.11,"endTime":805.71,"body":"life today. And are you where"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":802.11,"endTime":805.71,"body":"you want to be? Whether that's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":805.71,"endTime":808.62,"body":"in your marriage and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":805.71,"endTime":808.62,"body":"relationships? If that's in your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":808.62,"endTime":811.83,"body":"career, career comes to my mind,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":808.62,"endTime":811.83,"body":"big time here?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":813.24,"endTime":816.51,"body":"Is this where you want to be in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":813.24,"endTime":816.51,"body":"life at this point? Or did you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":816.51,"endTime":819.18,"body":"just follow someone else's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":816.51,"endTime":819.18,"body":"outline for life?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":820.68,"endTime":825.21,"body":"Rules don't exist. They are made"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":820.68,"endTime":825.21,"body":"by man, someone probably no"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":825.21,"endTime":827.94,"body":"smarter than you decided to put"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":825.21,"endTime":827.94,"body":"this on paper and we've blindly"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":827.94,"endTime":832.11,"body":"followed many of them. Yeah. You"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":827.94,"endTime":832.11,"body":"know, go to school, get a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":832.11,"endTime":835.59,"body":"degree, get a job work for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":832.11,"endTime":835.59,"body":"someone else get a 401 retire,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":835.95,"endTime":840.12,"body":"whatever. Yeah. And I think that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":835.95,"endTime":840.12,"body":"midlife crisis is exists because"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":840.12,"endTime":842.55,"body":"at some point, we questioned the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":840.12,"endTime":842.55,"body":"validity of these things. We're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":842.55,"endTime":846.27,"body":"like, Wait a second. Yep. Did I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":842.55,"endTime":846.27,"body":"even want this? Yep. Or was I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":846.27,"endTime":851.04,"body":"just fallen when everyone else?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":846.27,"endTime":851.04,"body":"Exactly. So that needs to be at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":851.04,"endTime":854.67,"body":"the the core of our discussion,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":851.04,"endTime":854.67,"body":"I think, is that mindset,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":854.97,"endTime":857.07,"body":"because when we talk about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":854.97,"endTime":857.07,"body":"relationships, especially"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":857.07,"endTime":859.41,"body":"codependent relationships,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":857.07,"endTime":859.41,"body":"addict relationships, or just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":859.41,"endTime":861.99,"body":"difficult relationships with"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":859.41,"endTime":861.99,"body":"people in your life in general,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":862.38,"endTime":864.78,"body":"you have to consider"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":862.38,"endTime":864.78,"body":"alternatives sometimes. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":864.81,"endTime":868.38,"body":"Because the tried and true"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":864.81,"endTime":868.38,"body":"methods have just left or right,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":868.38,"endTime":872.04,"body":"black or white don't make sense."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":868.38,"endTime":872.04,"body":"They don't apply here. No, we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":872.04,"endTime":875.13,"body":"taught vote this way or vote"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":872.04,"endTime":875.13,"body":"that way. Well, what about Hang"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":875.13,"endTime":878.34,"body":"on a second, I have a different"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":875.13,"endTime":878.34,"body":"opinion. There's no option."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":878.43,"endTime":881.91,"body":"Yeah. But in your own life, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":878.43,"endTime":881.91,"body":"can create options, you can do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":881.91,"endTime":885.03,"body":"those things, and we will talk"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":881.91,"endTime":885.03,"body":"about how to get there as well."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":885.06,"endTime":890.31,"body":"Yes. So let's talk about some"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":885.06,"endTime":890.31,"body":"examples here. Because I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":890.31,"endTime":892.77,"body":"that we've haven't really honed"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":890.31,"endTime":892.77,"body":"in on it like we did the Panera"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":892.77,"endTime":895.17,"body":"Bread ones, I think was pretty"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":892.77,"endTime":895.17,"body":"good. Yeah, but some of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":895.17,"endTime":897.84,"body":"examples like take us through a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":895.17,"endTime":897.84,"body":"few examples. Okay, so always"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":897.84,"endTime":900.0,"body":"taking care of others because we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":897.84,"endTime":900.0,"body":"should seek the well"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":900.0,"endTime":904.5,"body":"Being of everyone is a very mom"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":900.0,"endTime":904.5,"body":"attitude as well, it is it is."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":904.77,"endTime":908.34,"body":"So we're like constantly having"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":904.77,"endTime":908.34,"body":"to take, we think that we are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":908.34,"endTime":913.2,"body":"supposed to take care of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":908.34,"endTime":913.2,"body":"everyone. And we start to lose"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":913.2,"endTime":916.32,"body":"ourselves in that because we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":913.2,"endTime":916.32,"body":"focusing on what everyone else"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":916.32,"endTime":919.35,"body":"is doing instead of ourselves."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":916.32,"endTime":919.35,"body":"So finding that balance is that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":919.35,"endTime":922.83,"body":"you can focus on everyone and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":919.35,"endTime":922.83,"body":"yourself. That's not the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":922.83,"endTime":926.07,"body":"caretaker identity. Yeah, that's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":922.83,"endTime":926.07,"body":"just my role. It's what I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":926.07,"endTime":928.23,"body":"doing. These are the rules. This"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":926.07,"endTime":928.23,"body":"is what these people do. I've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":928.23,"endTime":931.35,"body":"right seen this happen. This is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":928.23,"endTime":931.35,"body":"how you do it. This is how I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":931.35,"endTime":934.23,"body":"raised. This is how I was taught"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":931.35,"endTime":934.23,"body":"to do this. This is how the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":934.23,"endTime":937.5,"body":"society works is that you have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":934.23,"endTime":937.5,"body":"to fill everybody else's cup"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":937.5,"endTime":939.3,"body":"before you fill yourself up."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":937.5,"endTime":939.3,"body":"Because we're supposed to take"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":939.3,"endTime":943.74,"body":"care of everyone else first and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":939.3,"endTime":943.74,"body":"it deep down. You're miserable"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":943.77,"endTime":947.25,"body":"when you do that, because you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":943.77,"endTime":947.25,"body":"not you're you're you lose"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":947.25,"endTime":949.65,"body":"yourself. Like I said, like I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":947.25,"endTime":949.65,"body":"lost myself. I wasn't doing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":949.65,"endTime":950.37,"body":"that, you know?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":952.14,"endTime":953.25,"body":"Alright, what's the next one?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":954.36,"endTime":958.05,"body":"Taller, you're so tired. I am."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":954.36,"endTime":958.05,"body":"But I think we got this."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":959.07,"endTime":963.33,"body":"Got this y'all tolerating an"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":959.07,"endTime":963.33,"body":"abusive, tolerating an abusive"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":963.33,"endTime":967.05,"body":"relationship? Because marriage"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":963.33,"endTime":967.05,"body":"is forever, right? Yeah. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":967.08,"endTime":969.87,"body":"you're taught to take care of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":967.08,"endTime":969.87,"body":"each other in sickness and in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":969.87,"endTime":974.31,"body":"health no matter what. This"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":969.87,"endTime":974.31,"body":"isn't always true. So it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":974.31,"endTime":976.41,"body":"controversial as hell, what you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":974.31,"endTime":976.41,"body":"just said, it is very"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":976.41,"endTime":978.3,"body":"controversial. A lot of people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":976.41,"endTime":978.3,"body":"are hearing this and be like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":978.3,"endTime":980.73,"body":"That's blasphemy. I think you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":978.3,"endTime":980.73,"body":"might have just lost half the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":980.73,"endTime":984.96,"body":"room. Right? Just hear us out"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":980.73,"endTime":984.96,"body":"real quick. Yeah, I think that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":984.96,"endTime":988.98,"body":"that only applies whenever"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":984.96,"endTime":988.98,"body":"you're both willing to work on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":989.01,"endTime":993.24,"body":"what is broken. Yeah. So when"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":989.01,"endTime":993.24,"body":"you say sickness in the health,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":993.24,"endTime":995.58,"body":"like we're not talking about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":993.24,"endTime":995.58,"body":"let's just let's let's address"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":995.58,"endTime":997.95,"body":"the all or nothing thinker in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":995.58,"endTime":997.95,"body":"the car listening to this, like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":997.95,"endTime":1000.71,"body":"we're not talking about like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":997.95,"endTime":1000.71,"body":"your spouse gets cancer, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1000.71,"endTime":1002.87,"body":"you're just like, Alright,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1000.71,"endTime":1002.87,"body":"peace. Like, that's not what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1002.87,"endTime":1006.14,"body":"we're talking about here. Right?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1002.87,"endTime":1006.14,"body":"Like, to the wheels fall off"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1006.14,"endTime":1009.02,"body":"till the wheels fall off is our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1006.14,"endTime":1009.02,"body":"battle cry. And that's the name"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1009.02,"endTime":1013.1,"body":"of the show. And it's the name"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1009.02,"endTime":1013.1,"body":"of this thing we're doing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1013.1,"endTime":1017.48,"body":"because it's been a belief of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1013.1,"endTime":1017.48,"body":"ours forever, that until the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1017.48,"endTime":1020.57,"body":"wheels fall off, I've got your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1017.48,"endTime":1020.57,"body":"back. But there's a there's an"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1020.57,"endTime":1022.64,"body":"asterisk. There's a caveat."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1020.57,"endTime":1022.64,"body":"There's something written"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1022.64,"endTime":1026.15,"body":"underneath the surface there"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1022.64,"endTime":1026.15,"body":"that is that we both share the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1026.15,"endTime":1029.57,"body":"same goal, and we're working"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1026.15,"endTime":1029.57,"body":"toward the same thing. And that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1029.57,"endTime":1034.01,"body":"can change over time. Yeah, that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1029.57,"endTime":1034.01,"body":"can change and, like in our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1034.01,"endTime":1034.88,"body":"relationship,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1036.32,"endTime":1039.56,"body":"we get asked us a lot. It's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1036.32,"endTime":1039.56,"body":"like, well, what would you have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1039.56,"endTime":1042.29,"body":"done if he would not have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1039.56,"endTime":1042.29,"body":"recovered if he would not have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1042.29,"endTime":1044.75,"body":"gotten better I would have been"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1042.29,"endTime":1044.75,"body":"gone, you would have been gone."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1044.78,"endTime":1048.02,"body":"So till the wheels fall, we have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1044.78,"endTime":1048.02,"body":"boundaries, right? We put"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1048.02,"endTime":1050.96,"body":"boundaries in place, you I put"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1048.02,"endTime":1050.96,"body":"that boundary in place with you,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1051.11,"endTime":1054.35,"body":"you put a boundary up in place"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1051.11,"endTime":1054.35,"body":"for me whenever I started"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1054.35,"endTime":1058.07,"body":"getting really mentally ill"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1054.35,"endTime":1058.07,"body":"whenever I was having major"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1058.07,"endTime":1062.6,"body":"panic attacks, like let's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1058.07,"endTime":1062.6,"body":"address this, if you do this, if"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1062.6,"endTime":1066.98,"body":"you don't get help, I'm going to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1062.6,"endTime":1066.98,"body":"have to leave. And that's okay,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1066.98,"endTime":1070.91,"body":"because I wasn't working towards"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1066.98,"endTime":1070.91,"body":"our marriage or making things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1070.94,"endTime":1073.4,"body":"and it's not like there weren't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1070.94,"endTime":1073.4,"body":"a million discussions that led"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1073.4,"endTime":1076.19,"body":"up to that moment, either. No,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1073.4,"endTime":1076.19,"body":"and it wasn't like I just I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1076.19,"endTime":1078.89,"body":"hands off. Like I was the one"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1076.19,"endTime":1078.89,"body":"calling the therapist. I was the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1078.89,"endTime":1083.81,"body":"one like buying the books. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1078.89,"endTime":1083.81,"body":"was, like, having my night, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1083.81,"endTime":1086.06,"body":"I had to do the work. Yeah, like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1083.81,"endTime":1086.06,"body":"if I wouldn't have done the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1086.06,"endTime":1089.12,"body":"work, you would have been gone."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1086.06,"endTime":1089.12,"body":"You had to be on board with me."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1089.12,"endTime":1092.66,"body":"You can't be in a marriage."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1089.12,"endTime":1092.66,"body":"That's one sided. Yes. So like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1092.66,"endTime":1096.11,"body":"we're not advocates necessarily"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1092.66,"endTime":1096.11,"body":"of staying together no matter"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1096.11,"endTime":1098.36,"body":"what. And we're not necessarily"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1096.11,"endTime":1098.36,"body":"advocates of like, just get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1098.36,"endTime":1102.02,"body":"divorced. It's easier, right?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1098.36,"endTime":1102.02,"body":"This is a gray area or area,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1102.05,"endTime":1105.77,"body":"their boundary. Every situation"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1102.05,"endTime":1105.77,"body":"is different. It's not all or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1105.77,"endTime":1108.26,"body":"nothing. Yeah, here we are,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1105.77,"endTime":1108.26,"body":"again, with the gray areas. Yep,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1108.29,"endTime":1112.1,"body":"it's true, like till the wheels"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1108.29,"endTime":1112.1,"body":"fall off. As long as we're both"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1112.1,"endTime":1114.56,"body":"walking, working toward the same"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1112.1,"endTime":1114.56,"body":"thing, man, we're walking in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1114.56,"endTime":1117.8,"body":"same direction. Yep. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1114.56,"endTime":1117.8,"body":"protecting people from harm is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1117.8,"endTime":1121.25,"body":"another one. I think as"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1117.8,"endTime":1121.25,"body":"caretakers like, even as parents"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1121.25,"endTime":1123.68,"body":"like I feel this one but no is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1121.25,"endTime":1123.68,"body":"like for women you feel this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1123.95,"endTime":1127.34,"body":"problem much stronger. Is that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1123.95,"endTime":1127.34,"body":"you feel like you have to save"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1127.34,"endTime":1130.28,"body":"others from consequences. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1127.34,"endTime":1130.28,"body":"Like you've got to protect your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1130.28,"endTime":1134.21,"body":"kids at all costs. And sometimes"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1130.28,"endTime":1134.21,"body":"that means like doing things for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1134.21,"endTime":1135.86,"body":"them so that they're not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1134.21,"endTime":1135.86,"body":"embarrassed or they don't get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1135.86,"endTime":1138.47,"body":"hurt. Like we're like we got a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1135.86,"endTime":1138.47,"body":"kid that will go to school and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1138.59,"endTime":1141.95,"body":"it's 20 degrees outside wearing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1138.59,"endTime":1141.95,"body":"shorts. And like he'll fight you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1141.95,"endTime":1145.22,"body":"tooth and nail on it. But it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1141.95,"endTime":1145.22,"body":"like, you know, I think you you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1145.22,"endTime":1146.54,"body":"were the one telling me like you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1145.22,"endTime":1146.54,"body":"know what, he's gonna have to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1146.54,"endTime":1148.52,"body":"experience this he's gonna have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1146.54,"endTime":1148.52,"body":"to get called at recess and be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1148.52,"endTime":1150.95,"body":"like, I made a poor life"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1148.52,"endTime":1150.95,"body":"decision today. Yeah, because"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1150.95,"endTime":1153.65,"body":"it's not gonna kill him that he"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1150.95,"endTime":1153.65,"body":"wore shorts when it's really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1153.65,"endTime":1157.28,"body":"cold outside no and like having"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1153.65,"endTime":1157.28,"body":"that fight and like just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1157.31,"endTime":1161.63,"body":"throwing your weight on him is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1157.31,"endTime":1161.63,"body":"really it's it's saving him from"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1161.63,"endTime":1164.03,"body":"natural consequences that he"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1161.63,"endTime":1164.03,"body":"needs to experience in order to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1164.24,"endTime":1167.57,"body":"see adversity that children need"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1164.24,"endTime":1167.57,"body":"Yeah, and not just children"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1167.57,"endTime":1171.65,"body":"people. Yeah, grown as people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1167.57,"endTime":1171.65,"body":"and as people, your husbands or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1171.65,"endTime":1177.26,"body":"wives, anybody in your life you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1171.65,"endTime":1177.26,"body":"have to allow them to make their"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1177.26,"endTime":1180.17,"body":"own mistakes. Yeah, and there's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1177.26,"endTime":1180.17,"body":"a gray area you can still be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1180.17,"endTime":1184.07,"body":"with them, love them and watch"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1180.17,"endTime":1184.07,"body":"them experience natural"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1184.07,"endTime":1187.58,"body":"consequences. right through it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1184.07,"endTime":1187.58,"body":"I think that that's till the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1187.58,"endTime":1189.95,"body":"wheels fall off. If it is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1187.58,"endTime":1189.95,"body":"anything at all. It's like I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1189.95,"endTime":1192.23,"body":"with you, even though you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1189.95,"endTime":1192.23,"body":"experiencing some crazy crap"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1192.23,"endTime":1194.03,"body":"right now. You're going through"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1192.23,"endTime":1194.03,"body":"it right now. Yep."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1195.38,"endTime":1198.38,"body":"Another one like this. This"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1195.38,"endTime":1198.38,"body":"one's big for me that I've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1198.41,"endTime":1199.97,"body":"always had a problem with. This"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1198.41,"endTime":1199.97,"body":"is like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1200.0,"endTime":1203.9,"body":"Work life balance, and finding"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1200.0,"endTime":1203.9,"body":"what that gray area looks like."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1203.93,"endTime":1206.72,"body":"I mean, like working hard is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1203.93,"endTime":1206.72,"body":"revered in our culture, maybe"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1206.72,"endTime":1209.21,"body":"not so much as it used to be."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1206.72,"endTime":1209.21,"body":"Yeah, I think some people would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1209.21,"endTime":1212.12,"body":"actually argue that it's not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1209.21,"endTime":1212.12,"body":"anymore, but it always has been"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1212.12,"endTime":1215.9,"body":"in my small circle, like working"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1212.12,"endTime":1215.9,"body":"hard. Like, you may not be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1215.9,"endTime":1218.39,"body":"smarter than me, but you will"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1215.9,"endTime":1218.39,"body":"not outwork me and like hustle"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1218.39,"endTime":1220.91,"body":"culture is really, really big,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1218.39,"endTime":1220.91,"body":"especially on like LinkedIn,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1220.91,"endTime":1223.64,"body":"like you can get on LinkedIn,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1220.91,"endTime":1223.64,"body":"and be made to feel like you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1223.64,"endTime":1225.89,"body":"not doing anything in your life,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1223.64,"endTime":1225.89,"body":"right? Because everyone's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1225.89,"endTime":1228.14,"body":"hustling harder than you and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1225.89,"endTime":1228.14,"body":"they're getting stuff done."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1228.2,"endTime":1232.13,"body":"Yeah. And I will do this at the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1228.2,"endTime":1232.13,"body":"expense of my health, my family"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1232.13,"endTime":1236.42,"body":"relationships, my friends,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1232.13,"endTime":1236.42,"body":"relationships, like everything"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1236.42,"endTime":1238.79,"body":"in my life, like everything will"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1236.42,"endTime":1238.79,"body":"suffer because of this because I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1238.79,"endTime":1243.38,"body":"go too far to one extreme. We've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1238.79,"endTime":1243.38,"body":"we've talked about extremes,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1243.38,"endTime":1247.16,"body":"you've heard this now several"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1243.38,"endTime":1247.16,"body":"times, let's discuss picture in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1247.16,"endTime":1251.06,"body":"your mind's eye for a moment, a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1247.16,"endTime":1251.06,"body":"grandfather clock, and it's got"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1251.06,"endTime":1254.51,"body":"a pendulum on it. And it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1251.06,"endTime":1254.51,"body":"swinging from one side to the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1254.51,"endTime":1257.78,"body":"other. It's going from one"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1254.51,"endTime":1257.78,"body":"extreme to the other."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1259.04,"endTime":1265.58,"body":"Back and forth, back and forth."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1259.04,"endTime":1265.58,"body":"This is what life looks like. We"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1265.58,"endTime":1269.6,"body":"swing from one side to the other"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1265.58,"endTime":1269.6,"body":"in order to make change before"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1269.6,"endTime":1273.95,"body":"we can find balance somewhere in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1269.6,"endTime":1273.95,"body":"the middle. Yep. So when we talk"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1273.95,"endTime":1277.19,"body":"about balance is what the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1273.95,"endTime":1277.19,"body":"discussion is really about? And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1277.19,"endTime":1280.97,"body":"how to find it. How do you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1277.19,"endTime":1280.97,"body":"recommend like someone's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1280.97,"endTime":1282.77,"body":"listening to this? And they're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1280.97,"endTime":1282.77,"body":"identifying something in their"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1282.77,"endTime":1285.98,"body":"life like, Okay, I've got to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1282.77,"endTime":1285.98,"body":"find balance when it comes to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1286.49,"endTime":1289.25,"body":"allowing people to walk all over"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1286.49,"endTime":1289.25,"body":"me, I need to find balance at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1289.25,"endTime":1291.65,"body":"work, I need to find that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1289.25,"endTime":1291.65,"body":"wherever How do you recommend"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1291.65,"endTime":1294.32,"body":"someone find it in the first"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1291.65,"endTime":1294.32,"body":"place? Okay, well, let's say"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1294.32,"endTime":1296.96,"body":"that you are a type of person"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1294.32,"endTime":1296.96,"body":"who puts everybody first and not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1296.96,"endTime":1302.48,"body":"yourself. I work with a lot of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1296.96,"endTime":1302.48,"body":"people who who struggle with"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1302.48,"endTime":1306.29,"body":"this, I was one of these people."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1302.48,"endTime":1306.29,"body":"And what worked for me is that I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1306.29,"endTime":1310.7,"body":"tell them that they have to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1306.29,"endTime":1310.7,"body":"focus on themselves first in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1310.7,"endTime":1313.82,"body":"order to start their healing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1310.7,"endTime":1313.82,"body":"process. So when they first"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1313.82,"endTime":1316.94,"body":"begin, the process is usually"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1313.82,"endTime":1316.94,"body":"super extreme to where they push"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1316.94,"endTime":1319.7,"body":"a lot of folks aside in order to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1316.94,"endTime":1319.7,"body":"work on themselves, right? They"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1319.7,"endTime":1324.05,"body":"go like too far, we go way too"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1319.7,"endTime":1324.05,"body":"far on, like focusing on that,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1324.05,"endTime":1326.87,"body":"like I'm saying to focus on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1324.05,"endTime":1326.87,"body":"them, but they're like, Oh, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1326.87,"endTime":1329.48,"body":"just got to focus on me. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1326.87,"endTime":1329.48,"body":"that's it. Nobody else. And this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1329.48,"endTime":1332.75,"body":"is okay, temporarily. I'm gonna"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1329.48,"endTime":1332.75,"body":"say this is okay, temporarily,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1332.75,"endTime":1337.34,"body":"because it's going to help you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1332.75,"endTime":1337.34,"body":"find that balance. Because you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1337.34,"endTime":1342.56,"body":"don't know the opposite until"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1337.34,"endTime":1342.56,"body":"you actually try it. Yeah. You"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1342.56,"endTime":1345.11,"body":"don't know what the extreme"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1342.56,"endTime":1345.11,"body":"looks like until you try it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1345.14,"endTime":1348.47,"body":"Yeah. Yeah. So allow yourself to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1345.14,"endTime":1348.47,"body":"make that mistake is what you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1348.47,"endTime":1351.8,"body":"saying I am, I'm telling you to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1348.47,"endTime":1351.8,"body":"make that mistake to go the what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1351.8,"endTime":1354.74,"body":"you've been doing totally"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1351.8,"endTime":1354.74,"body":"different. You go when you do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1354.74,"endTime":1358.82,"body":"that. And then eventually,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1354.74,"endTime":1358.82,"body":"you'll find that balance in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1358.82,"endTime":1362.09,"body":"between to where you can focus"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1358.82,"endTime":1362.09,"body":"on others, and focus on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1362.09,"endTime":1363.95,"body":"yourself. I love that. I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1365.06,"endTime":1367.64,"body":"this comes to my mind, like as"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1365.06,"endTime":1367.64,"body":"an example of this. I've done"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1367.64,"endTime":1371.39,"body":"this in my life many times when"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1367.64,"endTime":1371.39,"body":"it comes to fitness. I'm like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1371.42,"endTime":1373.94,"body":"Alright, I've been really unfit."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1371.42,"endTime":1373.94,"body":"I've been really out of shape,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1373.97,"endTime":1375.83,"body":"overweight, and I'm like, I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1373.97,"endTime":1375.83,"body":"going to I'm going to lose"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1375.83,"endTime":1379.16,"body":"weight. And I'll buy all the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1375.83,"endTime":1379.16,"body":"books, and I'll do all the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1379.16,"endTime":1382.88,"body":"things and I'll go super hard"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1379.16,"endTime":1382.88,"body":"and heavy. And I'll go, I mean,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1382.88,"endTime":1385.85,"body":"I'll, you know disregard"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1382.88,"endTime":1385.85,"body":"everything. It's all I talk"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1385.85,"endTime":1389.63,"body":"about. I want everyone to know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1385.85,"endTime":1389.63,"body":"what I'm up to. And I'm like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1389.78,"endTime":1392.69,"body":"I'm just that becomes my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1389.78,"endTime":1392.69,"body":"personality for a period of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1392.69,"endTime":1396.2,"body":"time. But it's not sustainable."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1392.69,"endTime":1396.2,"body":"And yes, people will get burned"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1396.2,"endTime":1400.22,"body":"out. I've been burned out many"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1396.2,"endTime":1400.22,"body":"times. And then I think about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1400.22,"endTime":1402.89,"body":"where I came from where I'm at."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1400.22,"endTime":1402.89,"body":"I'm like something in between"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1402.89,"endTime":1406.37,"body":"the two is probably the answer"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1402.89,"endTime":1406.37,"body":"here. So maybe I don't have to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1406.37,"endTime":1410.12,"body":"be so crazy. But I don't want to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1406.37,"endTime":1410.12,"body":"go back that first extreme where"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1410.12,"endTime":1412.73,"body":"I was being unhealthy. And I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1410.12,"endTime":1412.73,"body":"certainly don't want to do this,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1412.73,"endTime":1416.0,"body":"like where it's a full time job"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1412.73,"endTime":1416.0,"body":"either. So something in between"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1416.0,"endTime":1419.6,"body":"the two, or maybe three clicks"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1416.0,"endTime":1419.6,"body":"to the right of that is where I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1419.6,"endTime":1423.26,"body":"want to be Yeah, but you don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1419.6,"endTime":1423.26,"body":"find it until you go out there"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1423.26,"endTime":1426.2,"body":"and figure out what that looks"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1423.26,"endTime":1426.2,"body":"like. Yep. You have to change"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1426.2,"endTime":1429.86,"body":"the stakes. Do do it. Make the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1426.2,"endTime":1429.86,"body":"mistakes. Yeah. I mean, it was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1429.86,"endTime":1434.24,"body":"like a year for me of doing the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1429.86,"endTime":1434.24,"body":"complete extreme. And I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1434.24,"endTime":1436.91,"body":"grateful I did it because it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1434.24,"endTime":1436.91,"body":"helped me find that balance."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1436.91,"endTime":1440.12,"body":"Yeah, I love that. Just let"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1436.91,"endTime":1440.12,"body":"yourself make the mistake. gave"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1440.12,"endTime":1443.24,"body":"yourself permission to make the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1440.12,"endTime":1443.24,"body":"mistake. Yep. And other people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1443.48,"endTime":1445.94,"body":"keep them in the loop. They'll"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1443.48,"endTime":1445.94,"body":"understand what you're going"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1445.94,"endTime":1448.43,"body":"through, or they won't, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1445.94,"endTime":1448.43,"body":"that's on them. Yeah, you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1448.43,"endTime":1448.76,"body":"right. In"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1449.84,"endTime":1452.84,"body":"which case FM whatever, right."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1449.84,"endTime":1452.84,"body":"Okay. Yeah. But like you're on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1452.84,"endTime":1455.27,"body":"this as you write this your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1452.84,"endTime":1455.27,"body":"journey. Oh, no rules, right."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1455.3,"endTime":1457.07,"body":"There's no rule that says you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1455.3,"endTime":1457.07,"body":"have to be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1458.36,"endTime":1461.24,"body":"who you are today. Tomorrow."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1458.36,"endTime":1461.24,"body":"Yes. There's no rule that says"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1461.24,"endTime":1466.1,"body":"that. No, and I'm a big believer"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1461.24,"endTime":1466.1,"body":"in that. You can choose to be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1466.1,"endTime":1471.11,"body":"anyone you want to be starting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1466.1,"endTime":1471.11,"body":"now. Yep. Choose wisely. Okay."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1471.56,"endTime":1474.8,"body":"The next thing we would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1471.56,"endTime":1474.8,"body":"recommend to do is the simple"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1474.8,"endTime":1481.4,"body":"process of reflect and challenge"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1474.8,"endTime":1481.4,"body":"yourself. So regularly reflect"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1481.7,"endTime":1485.39,"body":"on your own thoughts and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1481.7,"endTime":1485.39,"body":"beliefs. And so ask yourself why"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1485.39,"endTime":1487.91,"body":"you hold certain beliefs and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1485.39,"endTime":1487.91,"body":"whether they're based on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1487.94,"endTime":1491.09,"body":"evidence or personal"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1487.94,"endTime":1491.09,"body":"experiences, or some sort of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1491.09,"endTime":1496.55,"body":"bias you have, or just some"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1491.09,"endTime":1496.55,"body":"arbitrary set of guidelines, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1496.55,"endTime":1499.22,"body":"challenge yourself to explore"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1496.55,"endTime":1499.22,"body":"what the opposite looks like."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1500.24,"endTime":1503.0,"body":"I wonder, okay, well, let's just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1500.24,"endTime":1503.0,"body":"say this weren't true, what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1503.0,"endTime":1505.61,"body":"would the opposite look like and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1503.0,"endTime":1505.61,"body":"allow yourself to explore that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1505.61,"endTime":1509.84,"body":"freely, without any judgement,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1505.61,"endTime":1509.84,"body":"just think about it. So, like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1509.84,"endTime":1511.82,"body":"let's think about your career."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1509.84,"endTime":1511.82,"body":"For instance, let's say that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1511.82,"endTime":1514.31,"body":"you're a copywriter or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1511.82,"endTime":1514.31,"body":"something, which is a job that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1514.31,"endTime":1517.16,"body":"AI will probably eliminate,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1514.31,"endTime":1517.16,"body":"sorry for all the copywriters"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1517.16,"endTime":1520.97,"body":"out there. But either way, let's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1517.16,"endTime":1520.97,"body":"say that that's your profession,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1520.97,"endTime":1522.74,"body":"you're not even sure how you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1520.97,"endTime":1522.74,"body":"ended up there, you're just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1522.74,"endTime":1525.56,"body":"doing it, you don't love it, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1522.74,"endTime":1525.56,"body":"don't get any joy from it. It's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1525.56,"endTime":1528.83,"body":"not what you wanted to do. It"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1525.56,"endTime":1528.83,"body":"just pays bills. Consider for a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1528.83,"endTime":1530.96,"body":"moment, if you weren't a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1528.83,"endTime":1530.96,"body":"copywriter, consider for a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1530.96,"endTime":1534.44,"body":"moment you were a marine"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1530.96,"endTime":1534.44,"body":"biologist or something, and what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1534.44,"endTime":1537.05,"body":"that would take for you to get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1534.44,"endTime":1537.05,"body":"there, and what your life would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1537.05,"endTime":1540.08,"body":"look like and live in that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1537.05,"endTime":1540.08,"body":"fantasy for a moment. challenge"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1540.08,"endTime":1542.6,"body":"those beliefs. And the more"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1540.08,"endTime":1542.6,"body":"often you do this, and you allow"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1542.6,"endTime":1546.35,"body":"yourself to wander and dream and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1542.6,"endTime":1546.35,"body":"think about things, you will"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1546.35,"endTime":1549.44,"body":"start to explore other"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1546.35,"endTime":1549.44,"body":"possibilities. Yeah, you won't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1549.44,"endTime":1553.1,"body":"be living by a set of rules or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1549.44,"endTime":1553.1,"body":"guidelines anymore, you'll more"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1553.1,"endTime":1556.13,"body":"than likely achieve balance when"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1553.1,"endTime":1556.13,"body":"you start questioning the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1556.13,"endTime":1557.69,"body":"beliefs that you hold true."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1559.22,"endTime":1563.48,"body":"What's next? Now you use the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1559.22,"endTime":1563.48,"body":"next one? She's so tired, y'all."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1564.38,"endTime":1567.05,"body":"Like I'm looking at her. It's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1564.38,"endTime":1567.05,"body":"like the lights are on nobody's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1567.05,"endTime":1570.41,"body":"home right now. I'm sorry."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1567.05,"endTime":1570.41,"body":"You're like that house at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1570.41,"endTime":1573.68,"body":"Halloween and turns off the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1570.41,"endTime":1573.68,"body":"porch lights at 7pm? Yeah, they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1573.68,"endTime":1576.92,"body":"stopped giving out candy. I know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1573.68,"endTime":1576.92,"body":"you got some in there. Let the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1576.92,"endTime":1580.76,"body":"listener have some candy page."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1576.92,"endTime":1580.76,"body":"Oh, come back to the door. All"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1580.76,"endTime":1584.3,"body":"right. Another thing that has"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1580.76,"endTime":1584.3,"body":"helped me a ton is seeking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1584.3,"endTime":1588.59,"body":"diverse perspectives. If your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1584.3,"endTime":1588.59,"body":"friend circle is rather"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1588.59,"endTime":1592.31,"body":"homogenous, and what I mean by"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1588.59,"endTime":1592.31,"body":"that is that you're all the same"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1592.31,"endTime":1595.34,"body":"color, you all came from the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1592.31,"endTime":1595.34,"body":"same background, you all went to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1595.34,"endTime":1597.86,"body":"the same schools and you work in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1595.34,"endTime":1597.86,"body":"the same jobs and you're the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1597.86,"endTime":1600.98,"body":"same level of income level of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1597.86,"endTime":1600.98,"body":"income. I'm like, slurring now."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1600.98,"endTime":1602.81,"body":"Because my lips are dry. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1603.83,"endTime":1607.85,"body":"more than likely, you're not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1603.83,"endTime":1607.85,"body":"drunk. You're no, your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1608.96,"endTime":1612.8,"body":"your guidelines will look very"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1608.96,"endTime":1612.8,"body":"similar. Right. So you'll be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1612.8,"endTime":1614.9,"body":"doing what your circle does,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1612.8,"endTime":1614.9,"body":"like we've said before, like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1614.9,"endTime":1616.94,"body":"you're only as sick as your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1614.9,"endTime":1616.94,"body":"circle. You know, he's healthy"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1616.94,"endTime":1620.57,"body":"is your circle. Yeah. So seeking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1616.94,"endTime":1620.57,"body":"diverse perspectives means"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1620.57,"endTime":1623.9,"body":"broadening your circle just a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1620.57,"endTime":1623.9,"body":"little bit. Yeah. Doesn't mean"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1623.9,"endTime":1626.06,"body":"you have to make it super wide."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1623.9,"endTime":1626.06,"body":"That's not go all or nothing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1626.06,"endTime":1629.96,"body":"extreme, but add some add some"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1626.06,"endTime":1629.96,"body":"flavor in it. Yeah. And consider"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1629.96,"endTime":1632.81,"body":"what that looks like. Like we've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1629.96,"endTime":1632.81,"body":"got friends from all walks of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1632.81,"endTime":1636.14,"body":"life. Yes. All walks of life."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1632.81,"endTime":1636.14,"body":"And I need to hear diverse"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1636.14,"endTime":1640.31,"body":"perspectives. Because I'm always"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1636.14,"endTime":1640.31,"body":"constantly questioning what I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1640.31,"endTime":1643.31,"body":"believe to be true. Absolutely."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1640.31,"endTime":1643.31,"body":"Always. 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He had this great"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1720.11,"endTime":1723.44,"body":"way of delivering this these"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1720.11,"endTime":1723.44,"body":"like comedic lines that were"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1723.44,"endTime":1727.07,"body":"very profound. And that's one of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1723.44,"endTime":1727.07,"body":"my favorites. And it's basically"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1727.07,"endTime":1727.88,"body":"saying that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1729.02,"endTime":1733.13,"body":"the things that we just know for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1729.02,"endTime":1733.13,"body":"sure to be true are often the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1733.13,"endTime":1737.51,"body":"things that stall growth, get us"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1733.13,"endTime":1737.51,"body":"into trouble and block us off"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1737.51,"endTime":1740.84,"body":"from the beauty of life. 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So in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1748.28,"endTime":1752.45,"body":"summary here as we've kind of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1752.84,"endTime":1758.27,"body":"run you through this balance"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1752.84,"endTime":1758.27,"body":"exercise and identifying the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1758.27,"endTime":1761.24,"body":"cognitive distortion at the at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1758.27,"endTime":1761.24,"body":"the root of it all which is this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1761.24,"endTime":1765.5,"body":"extreme all or nothing thinking."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1761.24,"endTime":1765.5,"body":"Balance is the goal, like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1765.5,"endTime":1769.85,"body":"balance should always be the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1765.5,"endTime":1769.85,"body":"goal. But in order to achieve"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1769.85,"endTime":1772.19,"body":"balance in order to find what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1769.85,"endTime":1772.19,"body":"balance looks like you have to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1772.19,"endTime":1775.28,"body":"fall first think of your child"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1772.19,"endTime":1775.28,"body":"or if you don't have a child"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1775.28,"endTime":1779.45,"body":"think of a child walking for the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1775.28,"endTime":1779.45,"body":"first time baby knows what it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1779.45,"endTime":1782.18,"body":"like to crawl baby decides"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1779.45,"endTime":1782.18,"body":"there's more than this out there"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1782.18,"endTime":1786.89,"body":"I see all you bipedal people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1782.18,"endTime":1786.89,"body":"walking around so baby stands up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1786.92,"endTime":1790.4,"body":"takes a few steps baby crashes"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1786.92,"endTime":1790.4,"body":"and falls baby you know falls"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1790.4,"endTime":1794.75,"body":"over man. 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I think that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1833.99,"endTime":1838.37,"body":"we lose our sense of self"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1838.37,"endTime":1841.22,"body":"sometimes in relationships, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1838.37,"endTime":1841.22,"body":"think to a degree once again,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1841.22,"endTime":1844.64,"body":"gray areas Some of that's a good"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1841.22,"endTime":1844.64,"body":"thing, right? 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If"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1936.08,"endTime":1940.46,"body":"you haven't already, check out"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1940.46,"endTime":1944.6,"body":"our new website. www.tufo.com."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1940.46,"endTime":1944.6,"body":"Hang on, Paige. She's got her"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1944.6,"endTime":1945.14,"body":"hand up."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1946.7,"endTime":1949.43,"body":"I did want to bring up that a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1946.7,"endTime":1949.43,"body":"lot of things. 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But it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2023.11,"endTime":2025.24,"body":"about it's a place for people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2025.24,"endTime":2029.38,"body":"with a shared purpose to come"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2025.24,"endTime":2029.38,"body":"and discuss and not feel alone."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2029.41,"endTime":2032.02,"body":"I think that's really what it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2029.41,"endTime":2032.02,"body":"was started for. Yes, it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2032.02,"endTime":2034.96,"body":"serving its purpose. And I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2032.02,"endTime":2034.96,"body":"it's an amazing, amazing thing."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2034.99,"endTime":2037.84,"body":"I'm looking forward to seeing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2034.99,"endTime":2037.84,"body":"that grow. We've mentioned in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2037.84,"endTime":2040.15,"body":"the past several episodes, the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2037.84,"endTime":2040.15,"body":"counseling for the futures"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2040.15,"endTime":2044.23,"body":"foundation, you can find out"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2040.15,"endTime":2044.23,"body":"more at counseling futures.org."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2044.5,"endTime":2047.71,"body":"This is an organization that I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2044.5,"endTime":2047.71,"body":"am part of and proud to be part"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2047.71,"endTime":2051.46,"body":"of pages also part of it by"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2047.71,"endTime":2051.46,"body":"proxy, I suppose because we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2051.49,"endTime":2052.45,"body":"doing everything together."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2053.74,"endTime":2057.85,"body":"But imagine a world where there"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2053.74,"endTime":2057.85,"body":"was a therapist there when you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2057.85,"endTime":2060.16,"body":"needed them, which isn't always"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2057.85,"endTime":2060.16,"body":"the case. And it's something"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2060.16,"endTime":2064.09,"body":"that we found in our search for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2060.16,"endTime":2064.09,"body":"a therapist, we're reaching out"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2064.12,"endTime":2066.94,"body":"over and over and over and we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2064.12,"endTime":2066.94,"body":"getting like voicemails, we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2066.94,"endTime":2070.48,"body":"sending emails and you get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2066.94,"endTime":2070.48,"body":"nothing back. And you reach out"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2070.48,"endTime":2074.17,"body":"when you're in crisis, and you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2070.48,"endTime":2074.17,"body":"need someone to be there. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2074.17,"endTime":2076.93,"body":"the fact of the matter is, is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2074.17,"endTime":2076.93,"body":"there are not enough therapists"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2076.93,"endTime":2079.51,"body":"to go around there are not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2076.93,"endTime":2079.51,"body":"enough of them to meet the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2079.51,"endTime":2082.84,"body":"growing demand of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2079.51,"endTime":2082.84,"body":"deteriorating state of mental"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2082.84,"endTime":2086.02,"body":"health in this country. And so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2082.84,"endTime":2086.02,"body":"we are trying to change that a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2086.02,"endTime":2088.96,"body":"big reason that therapists never"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2086.02,"endTime":2088.96,"body":"enter the field is because"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2088.96,"endTime":2092.32,"body":"school is incredibly expensive."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2088.96,"endTime":2092.32,"body":"education costs rise every"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2092.32,"endTime":2095.92,"body":"single year. And what therapists"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2092.32,"endTime":2095.92,"body":"can earn especially as a new"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2095.92,"endTime":2098.86,"body":"therapist in their first couple"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2095.92,"endTime":2098.86,"body":"of years, just doesn't make"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2098.86,"endTime":2099.97,"body":"sense. It doesn't add up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2100.0,"endTime":2103.27,"body":"Yeah, they're paying tons and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2100.0,"endTime":2103.27,"body":"tons interest on their student"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2103.27,"endTime":2106.57,"body":"loans. And they're trying to get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2103.27,"endTime":2106.57,"body":"by and they want to help, they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2106.57,"endTime":2109.78,"body":"want to help, but they also have"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2106.57,"endTime":2109.78,"body":"to eat. And they have to pay for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2109.78,"endTime":2113.98,"body":"gas, and they have to pay for an"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2109.78,"endTime":2113.98,"body":"apartment. And most choose not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2113.98,"endTime":2117.13,"body":"to enter the field because of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2113.98,"endTime":2117.13,"body":"that huge chunk of student debt"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2117.13,"endTime":2121.33,"body":"that just eats their budget. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2117.13,"endTime":2121.33,"body":"so we are trying to end that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2121.45,"endTime":2125.35,"body":"discussion in their minds. By"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2121.45,"endTime":2125.35,"body":"sending therapists through the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2125.35,"endTime":2128.71,"body":"graduate program completely debt"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2125.35,"endTime":2128.71,"body":"free, we are raising money to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2128.71,"endTime":2131.98,"body":"put therapists through graduate"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2128.71,"endTime":2131.98,"body":"level programs, so they can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2131.98,"endTime":2136.6,"body":"graduate with Not a cent of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2131.98,"endTime":2136.6,"body":"debt, which allows them to focus"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2136.6,"endTime":2141.64,"body":"on their patients, their work,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2136.6,"endTime":2141.64,"body":"their continuing education,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2141.97,"endTime":2146.53,"body":"providing incredible care,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2141.97,"endTime":2146.53,"body":"without the fear of going broke,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2146.86,"endTime":2148.99,"body":"and having their student debt"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2146.86,"endTime":2148.99,"body":"eat him alive. So check that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2148.99,"endTime":2153.19,"body":"out. I would love for you to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2148.99,"endTime":2153.19,"body":"check out the website, small"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2153.19,"endTime":2155.29,"body":"donation, you don't have to give"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2153.19,"endTime":2155.29,"body":"anything at all, but we would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2155.29,"endTime":2158.74,"body":"really appreciate just letting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2155.29,"endTime":2158.74,"body":"people know about this thing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2158.77,"endTime":2162.31,"body":"that it exists, share it out on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2158.77,"endTime":2162.31,"body":"social media, put it out in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2162.31,"endTime":2164.56,"body":"world, I'd really appreciate"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2162.31,"endTime":2164.56,"body":"your help with it. I need your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2164.56,"endTime":2165.16,"body":"help with this."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2166.72,"endTime":2169.27,"body":"There was something else I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2166.72,"endTime":2169.27,"body":"gonna ask, Oh, yeah, if you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2169.27,"endTime":2171.49,"body":"haven't already reviewed the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2169.27,"endTime":2171.49,"body":"show, please do that, too. We"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2171.49,"endTime":2173.53,"body":"just every time I get a new"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2171.49,"endTime":2173.53,"body":"review, I get so happy. We just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2173.53,"endTime":2176.38,"body":"got one recently. And I didn't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2173.53,"endTime":2176.38,"body":"know who was from but it was so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2176.38,"endTime":2178.81,"body":"cool. Just getting the feedback."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2176.38,"endTime":2178.81,"body":"It was an awesome review as a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2178.81,"endTime":2180.97,"body":"glowing review. But if you hate"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2178.81,"endTime":2180.97,"body":"the show, and you want me to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2180.97,"endTime":2184.66,"body":"know about that, that's fair,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2180.97,"endTime":2184.66,"body":"let me know you can take it to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2184.66,"endTime":2187.36,"body":"me one star, that's fine. Just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2184.66,"endTime":2187.36,"body":"give me some feedback. I really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2187.36,"endTime":2191.8,"body":"appreciate that. It also helps"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2187.36,"endTime":2191.8,"body":"the show grow in that when"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2191.8,"endTime":2194.29,"body":"people search the terms that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2191.8,"endTime":2194.29,"body":"kind of go along with our show,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2194.32,"endTime":2197.08,"body":"these things pop up, and it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2194.32,"endTime":2197.08,"body":"moves them up the search results"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2197.08,"endTime":2199.69,"body":"so that someone in need of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2197.08,"endTime":2199.69,"body":"something like this can find it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2199.72,"endTime":2202.42,"body":"which is crucial. Remember where"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2199.72,"endTime":2202.42,"body":"you were when you stumbled"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2202.42,"endTime":2205.9,"body":"across it? how helpful it was,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2202.42,"endTime":2205.9,"body":"someone else can have that same"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2205.9,"endTime":2210.52,"body":"feeling you can make it easier"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2205.9,"endTime":2210.52,"body":"for them by simply following in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2210.52,"endTime":2213.37,"body":"reviewing the show. Yeah, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2210.52,"endTime":2213.37,"body":"think that's all we've got. Oh,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2213.37,"endTime":2217.24,"body":"I'm so proud of you. Why carried"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2213.37,"endTime":2217.24,"body":"this one very well. Thank you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2217.39,"endTime":2220.87,"body":"guys. She's like half asleep. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2217.39,"endTime":2220.87,"body":"get one of yond about five times"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2220.87,"endTime":2223.27,"body":"dogs in the corner staring at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2220.87,"endTime":2223.27,"body":"us. Like why aren't we in bed"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2223.27,"endTime":2226.42,"body":"already? It's late for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2223.27,"endTime":2226.42,"body":"reference. It's like 11 o'clock."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2226.42,"endTime":2230.56,"body":"I think it? I don't know. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2226.42,"endTime":2230.56,"body":"it's like 11 so it's late. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2230.59,"endTime":2232.96,"body":"we're gonna get this thing out"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2230.59,"endTime":2232.96,"body":"there to you. Thank you again"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2232.96,"endTime":2235.33,"body":"for being here. would not be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2232.96,"endTime":2235.33,"body":"able to do this without you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2235.33,"endTime":2240.82,"body":"guys. We love you all. And until"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2235.33,"endTime":2240.82,"body":"next time, I am Matt. im PEI."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2240.82,"endTime":2242.38,"body":"We'll see you bye."}]}