{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":0.0,"endTime":1.86,"body":"Here's a really screwed"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":0.0,"endTime":1.86,"body":"up part about this and it's like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1.86,"endTime":3.45,"body":"even tougher to talk about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1.86,"endTime":3.45,"body":"because it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":5.13,"endTime":6.3,"body":"it's hard to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":7.35,"endTime":11.16,"body":"to come to terms of what I did"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":7.35,"endTime":11.16,"body":"to you psychologically. That's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":11.19,"endTime":13.05,"body":"that sucks. That sucks."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":14.46,"endTime":15.96,"body":"The the fallout from"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":17.01,"endTime":19.65,"body":"in gaslighting someone and what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":17.01,"endTime":19.65,"body":"that does to them and their self"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":19.65,"endTime":23.82,"body":"esteem to make them question"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":19.65,"endTime":23.82,"body":"their very reality that's sick"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":24.24,"endTime":26.85,"body":"and that is stuff that I had no"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":24.24,"endTime":26.85,"body":"clue"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":33.57,"endTime":38.67,"body":"Welcome back well calm back to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":33.57,"endTime":38.67,"body":"another episode of till the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":38.67,"endTime":42.51,"body":"wheels fall off. I'm Matt and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":38.67,"endTime":42.51,"body":"thank you for joining us"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":43.77,"endTime":47.25,"body":"we needed this tonight I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":43.77,"endTime":47.25,"body":"it's been a weird week. Yeah, it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":47.25,"endTime":51.15,"body":"has incredibly weird week. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":47.25,"endTime":51.15,"body":"we're recording on Sunday back"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":51.15,"endTime":54.18,"body":"to our usual day. So I guess"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":51.15,"endTime":54.18,"body":"we're three or four days removed"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":54.18,"endTime":57.93,"body":"from this. Um, we live in North"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":54.18,"endTime":57.93,"body":"Texas and we've grown up with"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":57.93,"endTime":60.15,"body":"like tornado watches and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":57.93,"endTime":60.15,"body":"warnings and tornadoes. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":60.15,"endTime":63.12,"body":"that's like a normal night, Dan,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":60.15,"endTime":63.12,"body":"near this time of year. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":63.18,"endTime":67.59,"body":"nothing crazy. Thursday night"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":63.18,"endTime":67.59,"body":"was one of these nights. Like it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":67.59,"endTime":71.16,"body":"was really humid, really hot and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":67.59,"endTime":71.16,"body":"storms are kicking up. And about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":71.16,"endTime":76.74,"body":"930 We're laying in bed. And the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":71.16,"endTime":76.74,"body":"kids had their cousin over."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":78.54,"endTime":80.58,"body":"seemed like a pretty normal"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":78.54,"endTime":80.58,"body":"night and then the storm start"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":80.58,"endTime":82.65,"body":"kicking up we heard the loudest"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":84.15,"endTime":88.14,"body":"crash we've ever heard in our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":84.15,"endTime":88.14,"body":"lives, and then followed by this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":88.14,"endTime":91.98,"body":"huge boom of thunder. And we've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":88.14,"endTime":91.98,"body":"heard this one other time. It's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":91.98,"endTime":96.21,"body":"lightning, like really, really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":91.98,"endTime":96.21,"body":"close lightning. This happened a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":96.21,"endTime":99.15,"body":"few years ago. This is a funny"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":96.21,"endTime":99.15,"body":"story. I'll tell really quickly."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":99.18,"endTime":103.11,"body":"I'd say it's funny. It's not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":99.18,"endTime":103.11,"body":"really funny. Jeez. Our neighbor"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":103.11,"endTime":108.66,"body":"had a birdhouse a bird out like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":103.11,"endTime":108.66,"body":"a bird hotel was more than a big"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":108.66,"endTime":112.14,"body":"big bird house. It probably held"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":108.66,"endTime":112.14,"body":"like 20 birds in it. And we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":112.14,"endTime":114.72,"body":"heard that same sound and it was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":112.14,"endTime":114.72,"body":"on an aluminum pole and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":114.72,"endTime":118.74,"body":"lightning struck the birdhouse"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":114.72,"endTime":118.74,"body":"and it exploded disintegrated"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":118.8,"endTime":122.91,"body":"and rip the bird families went"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":118.8,"endTime":122.91,"body":"with it. But there are pieces of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":122.91,"endTime":125.34,"body":"this thing everywhere. But this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":122.91,"endTime":125.34,"body":"was the same exact sound. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":125.34,"endTime":127.68,"body":"when we heard it, we looked at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":125.34,"endTime":127.68,"body":"each other the kids ran"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":127.68,"endTime":131.22,"body":"downstairs like oh my god, what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":127.68,"endTime":131.22,"body":"was that? I went outside to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":131.22,"endTime":136.23,"body":"check looked around didn't see"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":131.22,"endTime":136.23,"body":"anything weird. And then another"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":136.23,"endTime":139.2,"body":"round of sleep immediately. No,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":136.23,"endTime":139.2,"body":"there was a tornado warning. Oh,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":139.2,"endTime":141.9,"body":"that's true. Yeah, this that's a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":139.2,"endTime":141.9,"body":"big part. There was a tornado"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":141.9,"endTime":144.33,"body":"warning in our area. So there"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":141.9,"endTime":144.33,"body":"were some rotation going on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":144.36,"endTime":147.0,"body":"north of us. And we're in North"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":144.36,"endTime":147.0,"body":"Texas when tornado warnings"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":147.0,"endTime":149.55,"body":"happen. You know what we do? We"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":147.0,"endTime":149.55,"body":"go on the porches. We look"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":149.55,"endTime":150.39,"body":"outside, look around."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":151.62,"endTime":153.72,"body":"Where is it? No. But we had the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":151.62,"endTime":153.72,"body":"kids here. They were in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":153.72,"endTime":155.79,"body":"living room and it was getting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":153.72,"endTime":155.79,"body":"to a point where it was kind of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":155.79,"endTime":160.29,"body":"funky outside. So I decided to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":155.79,"endTime":160.29,"body":"start putting the kids into the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":160.29,"endTime":165.39,"body":"pantry. One child, our son was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":160.29,"endTime":165.39,"body":"actually having kind of a panic"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":165.39,"endTime":169.68,"body":"attack. Break down, man, I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":165.39,"endTime":169.68,"body":"pretty calm. But the girls were"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":169.68,"endTime":173.1,"body":"okay. And they were in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":169.68,"endTime":173.1,"body":"pantry. And then what happened?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":173.13,"endTime":176.16,"body":"So another round of storms"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":173.13,"endTime":176.16,"body":"starts coming through and it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":176.16,"endTime":179.4,"body":"starts to rain really hard. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":176.16,"endTime":179.4,"body":"I noticed a bunch of cars"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":179.4,"endTime":182.79,"body":"driving like in the street. I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":179.4,"endTime":182.79,"body":"like, man, it's summertime,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":182.82,"endTime":185.49,"body":"teenagers. Maybe they think it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":182.82,"endTime":185.49,"body":"funny to drive and hail. I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":185.49,"endTime":188.04,"body":"know. It was just really odd."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":185.49,"endTime":188.04,"body":"And I was kind of getting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":188.04,"endTime":191.1,"body":"irritated. I was like, What are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":188.04,"endTime":191.1,"body":"these guys doing? So open the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":191.1,"endTime":193.5,"body":"front door. And about that time"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":191.1,"endTime":193.5,"body":"I hear sirens and I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":193.5,"endTime":196.23,"body":"they're tornado sirens. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":193.5,"endTime":196.23,"body":"you're like, all right, there's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":196.23,"endTime":199.65,"body":"a sirens which I really hear"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":196.23,"endTime":199.65,"body":"sirens from here. No, so that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":199.65,"endTime":203.52,"body":"was weird. And then to my right,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":199.65,"endTime":203.52,"body":"we have a tree line that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":203.52,"endTime":206.73,"body":"separates our house from our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":203.52,"endTime":206.73,"body":"neighbor's house and I just see"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":206.73,"endTime":210.12,"body":"like this glow. I'm like, What"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":206.73,"endTime":210.12,"body":"in the world so I run out into"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":210.12,"endTime":214.02,"body":"the driveway. And then I see it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":210.12,"endTime":214.02,"body":"and our neighbor's house is in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":214.02,"endTime":217.77,"body":"flames. I mean in flames like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":214.02,"endTime":217.77,"body":"this. It's the scariest thing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":217.77,"endTime":220.62,"body":"I've ever seen. Yeah, so I ran"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":217.77,"endTime":220.62,"body":"outside the girls got out of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":220.62,"endTime":222.6,"body":"pantry y'all this is in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":220.62,"endTime":222.6,"body":"middle of a tornado warning"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":222.6,"endTime":226.68,"body":"still. Keep that in mind. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":222.6,"endTime":226.68,"body":"the girls ran outside and then"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":226.68,"endTime":231.3,"body":"they start screaming crying"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":226.68,"endTime":231.3,"body":"because we're seeing this glow"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":231.3,"endTime":236.04,"body":"and then these are starting to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":231.3,"endTime":236.04,"body":"come like towards our house. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":236.04,"endTime":238.83,"body":"I'm like alright, you know what,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":236.04,"endTime":238.83,"body":"I gotta get these kids out of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":238.83,"endTime":241.8,"body":"here. Yeah, so So Paige, because"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":238.83,"endTime":241.8,"body":"at this point our house was in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":241.8,"endTime":245.49,"body":"danger as well. Like there were"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":241.8,"endTime":245.49,"body":"flying hot embers landing in our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":245.49,"endTime":249.69,"body":"yard in the trees next to the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":245.49,"endTime":249.69,"body":"house on top of our house. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":249.72,"endTime":253.5,"body":"Paige took off I decided to stay"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":249.72,"endTime":253.5,"body":"back and direct any firefighters"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":253.71,"endTime":256.08,"body":"toured our house if it started"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":253.71,"endTime":256.08,"body":"to burn as well, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":257.399,"endTime":260.669,"body":"I mean an incredibly emotional"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":257.399,"endTime":260.669,"body":"and traumatizing experience"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":260.669,"endTime":263.099,"body":"truly like we're still rattled."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":260.669,"endTime":263.099,"body":"Our nerves are still really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":263.099,"endTime":266.729,"body":"wrong. Yeah, the house is a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":263.099,"endTime":266.729,"body":"total loss for neighbors, man. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":266.729,"endTime":269.519,"body":"mean, our hearts go out to them."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":266.729,"endTime":269.519,"body":"Yes, everyone got out safely."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":269.519,"endTime":271.709,"body":"Thank goodness Yeah, they should"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":269.519,"endTime":271.709,"body":"have started with that. They got"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":271.709,"endTime":273.839,"body":"out safely. Everything's okay."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":271.709,"endTime":273.839,"body":"They even got ours out of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":273.839,"endTime":276.569,"body":"garages but they didn't do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":273.839,"endTime":276.569,"body":"anything else. I just sat there"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":276.569,"endTime":277.559,"body":"across the street"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":278.7,"endTime":283.65,"body":"with our neighbor, and just in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":278.7,"endTime":283.65,"body":"this tense silence just watched"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":283.68,"endTime":285.9,"body":"the home go up in flames. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":283.68,"endTime":285.9,"body":"mean, there was nothing they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":285.9,"endTime":289.62,"body":"could do. The fire department"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":285.9,"endTime":289.62,"body":"got there really quickly, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":289.65,"endTime":293.37,"body":"this thing was just had so much"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":289.65,"endTime":293.37,"body":"fuel and the wind was so fierce."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":293.55,"endTime":295.86,"body":"Oh my gosh, even this even"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":293.55,"endTime":295.86,"body":"though I mean even the rain and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":295.86,"endTime":298.32,"body":"the hail couldn't stop it. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":295.86,"endTime":298.32,"body":"mean, it just engulfed it. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":298.32,"endTime":300.0,"body":"mean, this is and it's the most"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":298.32,"endTime":300.0,"body":"unnatural"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":300.0,"endTime":303.66,"body":"thing in the world to watch a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":300.0,"endTime":303.66,"body":"four year old home or five year"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":303.66,"endTime":306.3,"body":"old home up in flames, like you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":303.66,"endTime":306.3,"body":"think to yourself, like, oh, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":306.3,"endTime":308.58,"body":"have a new home. Maybe there's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":306.3,"endTime":308.58,"body":"some like materials in it that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":308.58,"endTime":311.61,"body":"make this like, not so bad."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":308.58,"endTime":311.61,"body":"Like, this is the thought I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":311.61,"endTime":314.67,"body":"having in my mind, like, newer"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":311.61,"endTime":314.67,"body":"homes don't do this. Like it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":314.67,"endTime":317.52,"body":"so unnatural to watch this like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":314.67,"endTime":317.52,"body":"old structures, you see it, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":317.52,"endTime":322.32,"body":"know, like, but when it's that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":317.52,"endTime":322.32,"body":"close to home, man, it shakes"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":322.32,"endTime":325.62,"body":"your sense of security, like you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":322.32,"endTime":325.62,"body":"would not believe it. Like that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":325.62,"endTime":328.05,"body":"first night, we only slept a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":325.62,"endTime":328.05,"body":"couple of hours because I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":328.05,"endTime":329.76,"body":"the fire department didn't even"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":328.05,"endTime":329.76,"body":"leave almost three in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":329.76,"endTime":330.24,"body":"morning."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":331.38,"endTime":334.26,"body":"And then another hailstorm hit"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":331.38,"endTime":334.26,"body":"like so disrespectful of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":334.26,"endTime":337.02,"body":"weather. Yes, it was after all"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":334.26,"endTime":337.02,"body":"of this, like another hailstorm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":337.02,"endTime":340.86,"body":"rolls through and like wakes us"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":337.02,"endTime":340.86,"body":"up at 233 in the morning. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":341.22,"endTime":344.19,"body":"you know, got to work the next"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":341.22,"endTime":344.19,"body":"day. And it's just this awkward,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":344.19,"endTime":347.04,"body":"weird feeling like you feel like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":344.19,"endTime":347.04,"body":"you just want to cry. I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":347.04,"endTime":349.2,"body":"you ended up having that moment"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":347.04,"endTime":349.2,"body":"where you just like broke down."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":349.2,"endTime":352.11,"body":"I did my adrenaline went away."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":349.2,"endTime":352.11,"body":"And I was just emotional. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":352.11,"endTime":355.23,"body":"like hit me like super charged"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":352.11,"endTime":355.23,"body":"on adrenaline for a while."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":355.26,"endTime":357.12,"body":"That's right. Like the whole"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":355.26,"endTime":357.12,"body":"next day was just adrenaline."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":357.12,"endTime":360.03,"body":"And then the following day,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":357.12,"endTime":360.03,"body":"there's still just like this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":360.03,"endTime":362.4,"body":"weird tension. It's just like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":360.03,"endTime":362.4,"body":"Oh my God, I don't know what to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":362.4,"endTime":366.21,"body":"do with this energy, it feels so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":362.4,"endTime":366.21,"body":"it's sad. And it's scary. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":366.21,"endTime":370.11,"body":"it's just feels horrible. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":366.21,"endTime":370.11,"body":"we're a few days removed from it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":370.11,"endTime":374.19,"body":"now. Today, we dropped the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":370.11,"endTime":374.19,"body":"kiddos off at summer camp for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":374.19,"endTime":377.64,"body":"two weeks, two weeks, they get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":374.19,"endTime":377.64,"body":"to go to camp, which means that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":377.64,"endTime":383.19,"body":"we are kidlets for two weeks,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":377.64,"endTime":383.19,"body":"which around here is we don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":383.19,"endTime":386.37,"body":"know what to do with ourselves"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":383.19,"endTime":386.37,"body":"that okay. It's sad because we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":386.37,"endTime":389.79,"body":"miss them so much. But it's also"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":386.37,"endTime":389.79,"body":"really cool because they get to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":389.79,"endTime":392.37,"body":"be independent from mom and dad"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":389.79,"endTime":392.37,"body":"and make decisions on their own."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":392.37,"endTime":394.44,"body":"We think it's really important"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":392.37,"endTime":394.44,"body":"for the growth that we've talked"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":394.44,"endTime":397.26,"body":"about this. Well, we have we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":394.44,"endTime":397.26,"body":"have, um, but it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":398.4,"endTime":401.46,"body":"the coolest part about it is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":398.4,"endTime":401.46,"body":"that when you come home, your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":401.46,"endTime":405.87,"body":"home is exactly as you left it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":401.46,"endTime":405.87,"body":"That's weird. It's a weird"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":405.87,"endTime":408.93,"body":"feeling. But what did we decide"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":405.87,"endTime":408.93,"body":"to do? So last night? Oh, yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":408.93,"endTime":411.84,"body":"so we dropped them off. So we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":408.93,"endTime":411.84,"body":"dropped them off about three and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":411.84,"endTime":414.93,"body":"a half hours from home. And we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":411.84,"endTime":414.93,"body":"had this long drive back. And I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":414.93,"endTime":417.57,"body":"think it was at some point maybe"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":414.93,"endTime":417.57,"body":"this morning, we mentioned it in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":417.57,"endTime":421.68,"body":"jest like, hey, we could we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":417.57,"endTime":421.68,"body":"could just go up to like, up to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":421.68,"endTime":424.23,"body":"Maine and just like hang out and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":421.68,"endTime":424.23,"body":"we kind of looked at me like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":424.41,"endTime":426.84,"body":"that sounds like a great idea."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":424.41,"endTime":426.84,"body":"Actually, that sounds like just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":426.84,"endTime":429.0,"body":"what the doctor ordered about,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":426.84,"endTime":429.0,"body":"you know, after everything we've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":429.0,"endTime":432.78,"body":"just kind of been through. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":429.0,"endTime":432.78,"body":"then on the way home, I guess we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":432.78,"endTime":435.0,"body":"had intermittent service. So it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":432.78,"endTime":435.0,"body":"took us forever to book this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":435.0,"endTime":437.25,"body":"thing. But we actually did we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":435.0,"endTime":437.25,"body":"booked a trip. So we're gonna go"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":437.58,"endTime":439.95,"body":"up to Maine for a few days,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":437.58,"endTime":439.95,"body":"we've got some work that we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":439.95,"endTime":444.99,"body":"going to do. We've got some"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":439.95,"endTime":444.99,"body":"modules to build more to come on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":444.99,"endTime":448.65,"body":"that later. But we're just gonna"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":444.99,"endTime":448.65,"body":"get some time away because our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":448.65,"endTime":452.31,"body":"nerves are shot. And we're in a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":448.65,"endTime":452.31,"body":"weird space after all that. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":452.31,"endTime":455.07,"body":"mean, that was tough to go"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":452.31,"endTime":455.07,"body":"through. I mean, really tough. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":455.07,"endTime":457.44,"body":"mean, I know it's much tougher"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":455.07,"endTime":457.44,"body":"for them. I don't. Yeah, I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":457.44,"endTime":460.59,"body":"mean to make this about us. But,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":457.44,"endTime":460.59,"body":"man, it was incredibly tough."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":460.92,"endTime":463.65,"body":"And the kids are traumatized."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":460.92,"endTime":463.65,"body":"And I'll probably be scarred for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":463.65,"endTime":465.84,"body":"the rest of the lives after"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":463.65,"endTime":465.84,"body":"saying yeah, our daughter slept"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":465.84,"endTime":468.33,"body":"in our bed that night after"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":465.84,"endTime":468.33,"body":"because she was just afraid. It"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":468.33,"endTime":471.09,"body":"was just kind of a triggering"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":468.33,"endTime":471.09,"body":"moment when it started getting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":471.09,"endTime":474.27,"body":"dark. She was thinking oh, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":471.09,"endTime":474.27,"body":"know what if it gets storming"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":474.27,"endTime":478.17,"body":"again and you know, catches on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":474.27,"endTime":478.17,"body":"fire the next night or the night"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":478.17,"endTime":480.84,"body":"after, well, it just that she"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":478.17,"endTime":480.84,"body":"was just kind of scared. So we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":480.84,"endTime":483.0,"body":"were like, alright, you can you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":480.84,"endTime":483.0,"body":"can hang out with us. That's it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":483.0,"endTime":485.7,"body":"Yeah, this time understandable."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":483.0,"endTime":485.7,"body":"And this this next week, we've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":485.7,"endTime":488.91,"body":"just got this oppressive heat"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":485.7,"endTime":488.91,"body":"headed into the area, like today"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":488.91,"endTime":492.93,"body":"was okay, it was 92 or 94"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":488.91,"endTime":492.93,"body":"degrees, which isn't bad. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":492.93,"endTime":495.87,"body":"when the humidity is as high as"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":492.93,"endTime":495.87,"body":"it is, it feels like it's 105"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":495.87,"endTime":498.66,"body":"out every day. Yeah. So we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":495.87,"endTime":498.66,"body":"disappearing to the land where"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":498.66,"endTime":502.65,"body":"it's 70 degrees every day. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":498.66,"endTime":502.65,"body":"for a high. Yeah, that's crazy."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":503.55,"endTime":507.66,"body":"Enough about us and our wild few"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":503.55,"endTime":507.66,"body":"days, I'd like to actually"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":507.66,"endTime":510.87,"body":"transition over into what we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":507.66,"endTime":510.87,"body":"actually going to talk about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":510.87,"endTime":516.54,"body":"today. That will be helpful for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":510.87,"endTime":516.54,"body":"our listeners. I agree nothing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":516.54,"endTime":518.82,"body":"about me. It's always about me."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":520.47,"endTime":522.54,"body":"Well, that's fitting for what we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":520.47,"endTime":522.54,"body":"are discussing."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":524.16,"endTime":526.29,"body":"Hey, so before we get started,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":524.16,"endTime":526.29,"body":"though, because I haven't even"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":526.29,"endTime":528.87,"body":"asked you this really where did"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":526.29,"endTime":528.87,"body":"the topic for this episode come"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":528.87,"endTime":532.29,"body":"from? Oh, from our Tufo"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":528.87,"endTime":532.29,"body":"community. Oh, okay. Someone had"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":532.29,"endTime":536.76,"body":"asked it in there. Yes."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":532.29,"endTime":536.76,"body":"Interesting. Yes, this episode"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":536.76,"endTime":540.6,"body":"is about gaslighting. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":536.76,"endTime":540.6,"body":"gaslighting has become like the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":540.6,"endTime":545.19,"body":"buzzword of social media over"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":540.6,"endTime":545.19,"body":"the last year or two. I think,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":545.61,"endTime":548.58,"body":"like on Twitter, it's guaranteed"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":545.61,"endTime":548.58,"body":"anytime I hop on Twitter and I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":548.58,"endTime":551.97,"body":"see anyone disagreeing with"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":548.58,"endTime":551.97,"body":"someone else. They get called"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":552.12,"endTime":555.48,"body":"the word gets thrown out there."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":552.12,"endTime":555.48,"body":"You're gaslighting me. gas lit"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":555.51,"endTime":558.96,"body":"or gas lighted. I don't know."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":555.51,"endTime":558.96,"body":"What's the proper term? I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":558.96,"endTime":561.24,"body":"know. I looked it up and it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":558.96,"endTime":561.24,"body":"really didn't give me an answer."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":561.27,"endTime":565.41,"body":"I guess the person doing it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":561.27,"endTime":565.41,"body":"would be the gas light tea, like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":566.49,"endTime":571.26,"body":"gas lit or I felt gaslighted"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":566.49,"endTime":571.26,"body":"What do you say? Call whatever"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":571.26,"endTime":574.92,"body":"you want. Okay, I'm just asking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":571.26,"endTime":574.92,"body":"if you knew no, I don't know. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":574.92,"endTime":577.8,"body":"don't know. But I do know that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":574.92,"endTime":577.8,"body":"it's misused a lot. I do know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":577.8,"endTime":581.97,"body":"that too. So what is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":577.8,"endTime":581.97,"body":"gaslighting? It's, this is the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":582.12,"endTime":585.75,"body":"the definition of gaslighting is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":582.12,"endTime":585.75,"body":"the subjective experience of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":585.75,"endTime":589.56,"body":"having one's reality repeated,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":585.75,"endTime":589.56,"body":"repeatedly questioned by"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":589.56,"endTime":594.54,"body":"another. And the term comes from"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":589.56,"endTime":594.54,"body":"film. And I just learned this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":594.54,"endTime":597.42,"body":"actually. The other day. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":594.54,"endTime":597.42,"body":"didn't even know this but it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":597.42,"endTime":599.97,"body":"came from a film in 1944"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":597.42,"endTime":599.97,"body":"American film called"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":600.0,"endTime":604.59,"body":"gaslight, which is a remake of a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":600.0,"endTime":604.59,"body":"1940s British film. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":605.609,"endTime":608.069,"body":"as much as I understand about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":605.609,"endTime":608.069,"body":"the movie, it's an older man and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":608.069,"endTime":610.079,"body":"a younger woman who's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":608.069,"endTime":610.079,"body":"essentially denying her"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":610.079,"endTime":613.949,"body":"experiences and invalidating her"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":610.079,"endTime":613.949,"body":"feelings about it. And he's in a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":613.949,"endTime":618.119,"body":"position of power and he is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":613.949,"endTime":618.119,"body":"essentially abusing her"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":618.149,"endTime":622.169,"body":"manipulation. It's emotional"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":618.149,"endTime":622.169,"body":"abuse is what it really is. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":622.169,"endTime":625.679,"body":"in 2022, The Washington Post"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":622.169,"endTime":625.679,"body":"described it as a trendy"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":625.679,"endTime":630.959,"body":"buzzword that is often used"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":625.679,"endTime":630.959,"body":"incorrectly, by people referring"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":630.959,"endTime":634.739,"body":"to simple disagreement that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":630.959,"endTime":634.739,"body":"don't meet gaslighting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":634.739,"endTime":638.009,"body":"historical definition. And this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":634.739,"endTime":638.009,"body":"has actually led to experts"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":638.009,"endTime":640.619,"body":"being concerned about the term"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":638.009,"endTime":640.619,"body":"becoming diluted and I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":640.619,"endTime":643.499,"body":"that we're we've arrived at that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":640.619,"endTime":643.499,"body":"point, because so many people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":643.499,"endTime":646.529,"body":"will say that I'm being"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":643.499,"endTime":646.529,"body":"gaslighted. And I'll read more"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":646.529,"endTime":648.719,"body":"into this or listen more. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":646.529,"endTime":648.719,"body":"I'm like, That's not quite"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":648.719,"endTime":651.389,"body":"gaslighting, that person just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":648.719,"endTime":651.389,"body":"disagrees with you. And they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":651.389,"endTime":653.759,"body":"don't like the same band that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":651.389,"endTime":653.759,"body":"you like, that's not the same"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":653.759,"endTime":658.289,"body":"thing, right? There's a heated"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":653.759,"endTime":658.289,"body":"argument. Like you really do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":658.289,"endTime":661.049,"body":"have to break it up, break it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":658.289,"endTime":661.049,"body":"apart. So guess what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":661.049,"endTime":663.779,"body":"distinguishes gaslighting it is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":661.049,"endTime":663.779,"body":"a form of psychological"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":663.779,"endTime":668.909,"body":"manipulation in which the abuser"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":663.779,"endTime":668.909,"body":"attempts to sow self doubt and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":668.909,"endTime":672.449,"body":"confusion and their victims"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":668.909,"endTime":672.449,"body":"mind. This is truly a form of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":672.449,"endTime":675.599,"body":"psychological manipulation is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":672.449,"endTime":675.599,"body":"not just disagreeing. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":675.599,"endTime":677.789,"body":"typically what a gaslighter is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":675.599,"endTime":677.789,"body":"doing is they're they're seeking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":677.789,"endTime":681.629,"body":"to gain power and control over"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":677.789,"endTime":681.629,"body":"another person by distorting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":681.629,"endTime":684.539,"body":"their reality and forcing them"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":681.629,"endTime":684.539,"body":"to question their own judgment"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":684.539,"endTime":687.629,"body":"and intuition. It's like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":684.539,"endTime":687.629,"body":"they're making you question the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":687.629,"endTime":690.959,"body":"very fiber of your being and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":687.629,"endTime":690.959,"body":"like, Oh, my God, like, was the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":690.959,"endTime":693.449,"body":"remote on the table 10 minutes"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":690.959,"endTime":693.449,"body":"ago."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":694.74,"endTime":697.32,"body":"That's what we're after. We're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":694.74,"endTime":697.32,"body":"not just talking about hey, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":697.32,"endTime":699.63,"body":"think that Jimmy world's a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":697.32,"endTime":699.63,"body":"terrible band, and I'm like, no,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":699.63,"endTime":701.52,"body":"they're great. I love their"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":699.63,"endTime":701.52,"body":"older stuff, man, you don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":701.52,"endTime":705.0,"body":"understand it's not that it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":701.52,"endTime":705.0,"body":"not the it's not the barista"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":705.0,"endTime":708.54,"body":"getting your your name wrong on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":705.0,"endTime":708.54,"body":"your coffee and saying, Well,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":708.54,"endTime":712.05,"body":"you told me your name was Carl,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":708.54,"endTime":712.05,"body":"but you're saying your name is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":712.08,"endTime":715.98,"body":"Kevin. But and then them saying"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":712.08,"endTime":715.98,"body":"but you said Carl that's not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":715.98,"endTime":718.35,"body":"gaslighting, right. That's just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":715.98,"endTime":718.35,"body":"a simple disagreement. That's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":718.35,"endTime":721.11,"body":"not the same thing. That's just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":718.35,"endTime":721.11,"body":"a disagreement what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":721.14,"endTime":724.62,"body":"distinguishes gaslighting, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":721.14,"endTime":724.62,"body":"this is a repeated pattern over"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":724.62,"endTime":729.24,"body":"time. That takes place. Usually"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":724.62,"endTime":729.24,"body":"it's not one event, it is like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":729.36,"endTime":731.94,"body":"it's a pattern. Yeah, years of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":729.36,"endTime":731.94,"body":"events. Yes, that take place."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":731.94,"endTime":735.96,"body":"It's not just one thing, right?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":731.94,"endTime":735.96,"body":"So this is interesting because"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":735.96,"endTime":740.97,"body":"and we couldn't find real firm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":735.96,"endTime":740.97,"body":"data on this but in our world of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":740.97,"endTime":745.8,"body":"addiction and codependency and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":740.97,"endTime":745.8,"body":"the you know, the intermingle"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":745.8,"endTime":747.81,"body":"ment of these two people and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":745.8,"endTime":747.81,"body":"these two parties in a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":747.81,"endTime":751.32,"body":"relationship, there's a lot of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":747.81,"endTime":751.32,"body":"this that goes on. And I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":751.32,"endTime":753.75,"body":"curious as to how much of this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":751.32,"endTime":753.75,"body":"is actually caused by the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":753.75,"endTime":757.05,"body":"addiction and wanting to cover"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":753.75,"endTime":757.05,"body":"up the addiction and how much is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":757.05,"endTime":760.53,"body":"actually part of where this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":757.05,"endTime":760.53,"body":"usually comes from, which is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":760.53,"endTime":765.18,"body":"narcissistic personality"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":760.53,"endTime":765.18,"body":"disorder NPD, which is this is a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":765.81,"endTime":770.73,"body":"an earmark of a narcissist. a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":765.81,"endTime":770.73,"body":"narcissist is gaslighting. They"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":770.73,"endTime":774.24,"body":"often do this. And we can get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":770.73,"endTime":774.24,"body":"into that another time. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":774.24,"endTime":776.37,"body":"we're not going to touch on that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":774.24,"endTime":776.37,"body":"part we're going to touch on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":776.37,"endTime":779.82,"body":"because that's ex addiction"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":776.37,"endTime":779.82,"body":"relations, because that's the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":779.82,"endTime":784.32,"body":"new buzzword of 2023. Everyone's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":779.82,"endTime":784.32,"body":"a narcissist. Now, everyone's a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":784.32,"endTime":787.35,"body":"narcissist. It's just not that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":784.32,"endTime":787.35,"body":"common guys, we just don't quite"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":787.35,"endTime":789.9,"body":"understand what it means we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":787.35,"endTime":789.9,"body":"gonna dig into that soon. Oh,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":789.9,"endTime":792.93,"body":"social media. Oh, I've already"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":789.9,"endTime":792.93,"body":"I've kind of already missed a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":792.93,"endTime":795.66,"body":"segue into this. But we had the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":792.93,"endTime":795.66,"body":"we asked the question on social"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":795.66,"endTime":799.08,"body":"media a few weeks ago about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":795.66,"endTime":799.08,"body":"what's going on with men these"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":799.08,"endTime":803.91,"body":"days. 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I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":821.37,"endTime":824.67,"body":"saying that in a way that I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":821.37,"endTime":824.67,"body":"like 10 years ago, these these"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":824.67,"endTime":827.64,"body":"women wouldn't be on the market"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":824.67,"endTime":827.64,"body":"what's going on? And so you ask"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":827.64,"endTime":832.59,"body":"questions like, what's up with"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":827.64,"endTime":832.59,"body":"that in their answers are very"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":832.59,"endTime":835.98,"body":"strikingly similar. So similar."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":832.59,"endTime":835.98,"body":"So there's something to this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":835.98,"endTime":838.38,"body":"that I'm we're currently digging"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":835.98,"endTime":838.38,"body":"into. Yeah. And I want to get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":838.38,"endTime":840.27,"body":"the bottom of it. And there's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":838.38,"endTime":840.27,"body":"going to be a really interesting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":840.3,"endTime":843.57,"body":"episode to come off it. Yes. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":840.3,"endTime":843.57,"body":"stay tuned for that. We've got a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":843.57,"endTime":845.64,"body":"couple of things in the works."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":843.57,"endTime":845.64,"body":"We've got the narcissist episode"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":845.64,"endTime":847.89,"body":"in the works. We've also oh my"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":845.64,"endTime":847.89,"body":"gosh, I've got like other ones."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":847.89,"endTime":851.1,"body":"We'll talk about five or six as"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":847.89,"endTime":851.1,"body":"well. Or you got Yeah, bunch of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":851.1,"endTime":853.23,"body":"these things and a lot going on."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":851.1,"endTime":853.23,"body":"But that was that was so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":853.23,"endTime":855.15,"body":"interesting. It was going to be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":853.23,"endTime":855.15,"body":"really fun. And I just I didn't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":855.15,"endTime":857.01,"body":"want to leave people hanging on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":855.15,"endTime":857.01,"body":"that cuz I think a lot of people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":857.01,"endTime":859.38,"body":"have even messaged us like, Hey,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":857.01,"endTime":859.38,"body":"what's that one coming out?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":859.38,"endTime":861.96,"body":"Because I want to know more"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":859.38,"endTime":861.96,"body":"about that. Yes. And like, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":861.96,"endTime":867.78,"body":"It's gonna be so exciting. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":861.96,"endTime":867.78,"body":"anyway, um, I was a gaslight"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":867.78,"endTime":873.15,"body":"tour. I guess. Gas lighter. Gas"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":867.78,"endTime":873.15,"body":"lighter. Yeah, slider. I did"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":873.15,"endTime":876.93,"body":"this for a very long time. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":873.15,"endTime":876.93,"body":"but I didn't know what this word"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":876.93,"endTime":879.69,"body":"meant. And I didn't know what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":876.93,"endTime":879.69,"body":"you were doing. I didn't know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":879.69,"endTime":882.66,"body":"what I was doing either. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":879.69,"endTime":882.66,"body":"thought that after the fact I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":882.66,"endTime":885.72,"body":"was like, Oh, crap, I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":882.66,"endTime":885.72,"body":"totally doing that. Yeah, so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":885.72,"endTime":887.52,"body":"we're in this episode, we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":885.72,"endTime":887.52,"body":"going to talk about like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":887.52,"endTime":891.36,"body":"examples, and then what does it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":887.52,"endTime":891.36,"body":"look like within an addict and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":891.36,"endTime":895.08,"body":"then how you can actually handle"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":891.36,"endTime":895.08,"body":"these situations in your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":895.08,"endTime":898.62,"body":"relationships? What did it look"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":895.08,"endTime":898.62,"body":"like for you? I want your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":898.62,"endTime":899.97,"body":"experience now."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":900.0,"endTime":902.73,"body":"Not what I say, what was your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":900.0,"endTime":902.73,"body":"experience with me when I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":902.73,"endTime":903.6,"body":"doing this to you?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":905.22,"endTime":909.15,"body":"Okay, um, I'll think of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":905.22,"endTime":909.15,"body":"times whenever I would ask you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":909.66,"endTime":914.49,"body":"about, where is the money"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":909.66,"endTime":914.49,"body":"coming? Going from our account?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":914.79,"endTime":918.42,"body":"Oh, god. Yeah. So you would lie?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":914.79,"endTime":918.42,"body":"Yeah. And I would play"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":919.56,"endTime":922.8,"body":"with and you would play these"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":919.56,"endTime":922.8,"body":"games? And sometimes it would be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":922.8,"endTime":926.67,"body":"like, No, I don't know, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":922.8,"endTime":926.67,"body":"know, maybe you looked at it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":926.67,"endTime":929.28,"body":"wrong or something. I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":926.67,"endTime":929.28,"body":"know. It's just you kind of you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":929.28,"endTime":931.59,"body":"would spin it a lot. I would try"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":929.28,"endTime":931.59,"body":"to get really creative with the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":931.59,"endTime":934.14,"body":"mathematics and just convince"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":931.59,"endTime":934.14,"body":"you that like, You're crazy,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":934.14,"endTime":937.02,"body":"like, everything's fine. What"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":934.14,"endTime":937.02,"body":"are you talking about? Yeah, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":937.02,"endTime":940.41,"body":"remember doing that, like in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":937.02,"endTime":940.41,"body":"this desperate attempt to keep"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":940.41,"endTime":943.86,"body":"my lie intact. I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":940.41,"endTime":943.86,"body":"exhausting is that that's the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":943.86,"endTime":945.03,"body":"reason I don't do drugs anymore."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":943.86,"endTime":945.03,"body":"I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":946.74,"endTime":950.07,"body":"try to keep all of the things"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":946.74,"endTime":950.07,"body":"straight that you tell people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":950.1,"endTime":952.59,"body":"but I guess one example that I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":950.1,"endTime":952.59,"body":"can think of, here's a really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":952.59,"endTime":954.33,"body":"screwed up part about this. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":952.59,"endTime":954.33,"body":"it's like, even tough for me to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":954.33,"endTime":955.5,"body":"talk about because it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":957.06,"endTime":961.05,"body":"it's hard to, to come to terms"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":957.06,"endTime":961.05,"body":"of what I did to us"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":961.05,"endTime":964.98,"body":"psychologically, though, like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":961.05,"endTime":964.98,"body":"that's, that sucks. That sucks."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":964.98,"endTime":970.38,"body":"I did. The the fallout from it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":964.98,"endTime":970.38,"body":"And gaslighting someone and what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":970.38,"endTime":973.02,"body":"that does to them and their self"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":970.38,"endTime":973.02,"body":"esteem to make them question"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":973.05,"endTime":978.54,"body":"their very reality. That's sick."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":973.05,"endTime":978.54,"body":"And that is stuff that I had no"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":978.54,"endTime":981.21,"body":"clue that I was doing. Like, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":978.54,"endTime":981.21,"body":"just thought I was just covering"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":981.21,"endTime":984.87,"body":"up a lie, you know, and I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":981.21,"endTime":984.87,"body":"just not this. I wasn't like so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":984.87,"endTime":988.44,"body":"much conscious about it, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":984.87,"endTime":988.44,"body":"guess, to say I was just really,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":988.8,"endTime":992.49,"body":"really sick and trying to cover"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":988.8,"endTime":992.49,"body":"myself up. And I think that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":992.49,"endTime":995.91,"body":"addicts do this a lot. And so I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":992.49,"endTime":995.91,"body":"don't know how calm and like we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":995.91,"endTime":998.16,"body":"couldn't find the day like How"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":995.91,"endTime":998.16,"body":"common is gaslighting with"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":998.16,"endTime":1000.44,"body":"addicts? But I think it's really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":998.16,"endTime":1000.44,"body":"effing common. Yeah, I think"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1000.44,"endTime":1004.4,"body":"that I know a lot of addicts."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1000.44,"endTime":1004.4,"body":"I'm talking. I've met and talked"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1004.4,"endTime":1007.19,"body":"to and worked with hundreds, if"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1004.4,"endTime":1007.19,"body":"not 1000s of people over the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1007.19,"endTime":1010.55,"body":"years. And we all do this. We"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1007.19,"endTime":1010.55,"body":"all do this to some degree."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1011.99,"endTime":1014.33,"body":"So I just I kind of wanted your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1011.99,"endTime":1014.33,"body":"experience on that. So like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1014.33,"endTime":1017.45,"body":"what are some examples of this?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1014.33,"endTime":1017.45,"body":"Okay, so like you've already"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1017.45,"endTime":1020.78,"body":"said before making you question"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1017.45,"endTime":1020.78,"body":"your reality. I know you've,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1020.81,"endTime":1023.81,"body":"you've said that a lot. But you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1020.81,"endTime":1023.81,"body":"did that a lot within our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1023.81,"endTime":1027.26,"body":"relationship for sure. I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1023.81,"endTime":1027.26,"body":"trying to convince you that a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1027.26,"endTime":1030.5,"body":"problem is not a problem. That's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1027.26,"endTime":1030.5,"body":"another thing. Like there's a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1030.5,"endTime":1033.53,"body":"lot of times that I'd be like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1030.5,"endTime":1033.53,"body":"No, this is a problem. And you'd"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1033.53,"endTime":1037.85,"body":"be like, that's not a big deal."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1033.53,"endTime":1037.85,"body":"This is fine. Minimizing. We're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1037.85,"endTime":1041.63,"body":"good for sure. Yeah. Like I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1037.85,"endTime":1041.63,"body":"mean, it was that happened a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1041.63,"endTime":1045.23,"body":"lot. Reverse victim offender. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1041.63,"endTime":1045.23,"body":"basically victim blaming. Yep."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1045.71,"endTime":1048.35,"body":"Lying even when there's proof"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1045.71,"endTime":1048.35,"body":"that has to do with like the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1048.35,"endTime":1050.6,"body":"money thing I was talking about,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1048.35,"endTime":1050.6,"body":"like, look, there's money"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1050.63,"endTime":1052.1,"body":"missing, like what are we doing?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1053.63,"endTime":1058.19,"body":"Projects their own behavior on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1053.63,"endTime":1058.19,"body":"you? I don't really remember you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1058.19,"endTime":1062.09,"body":"doing that specifically. But I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1058.19,"endTime":1062.09,"body":"don't know. It's really hard to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1062.09,"endTime":1065.0,"body":"tell when people are no, I would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1062.09,"endTime":1065.0,"body":"totally do that. No, no, no, no,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1065.0,"endTime":1067.79,"body":"no, this is this was no I did do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1065.0,"endTime":1067.79,"body":"this. This is what it looked"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1067.79,"endTime":1071.3,"body":"like, though. You remember? So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1067.79,"endTime":1071.3,"body":"as you are like frantically"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1071.3,"endTime":1074.06,"body":"upset, like, I know something's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1071.3,"endTime":1074.06,"body":"up. I know something's up. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1074.06,"endTime":1076.82,"body":"would basically convince you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1074.06,"endTime":1076.82,"body":"like, listen, you're manic like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1076.82,"endTime":1078.83,"body":"do you not hear yourself? Like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1076.82,"endTime":1078.83,"body":"you're crazy. You're keeping"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1078.83,"endTime":1081.17,"body":"track of all these transactions?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1078.83,"endTime":1081.17,"body":"Like you're obsessed? You're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1081.17,"endTime":1084.26,"body":"crazy. That's what it looked"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1081.17,"endTime":1084.26,"body":"like. You remember that? Is that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1084.26,"endTime":1086.87,"body":"sound familiar? Now? Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1084.26,"endTime":1086.87,"body":"that's, that's what that is."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1086.99,"endTime":1089.72,"body":"Thank you for that. So I was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1086.99,"endTime":1089.72,"body":"crazy. projecting my stuff onto"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1089.72,"endTime":1092.78,"body":"you. Yeah. And then telling you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1089.72,"endTime":1092.78,"body":"you're imagining things. Oh, all"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1092.78,"endTime":1095.48,"body":"the time, man. Yeah, I know, a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1092.78,"endTime":1095.48,"body":"lot of people deal with a lot of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1095.48,"endTime":1098.42,"body":"this stuff. Yeah. And like, at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1095.48,"endTime":1098.42,"body":"its simplest form, what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1098.42,"endTime":1100.43,"body":"gaslighting really is it's to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1098.42,"endTime":1100.43,"body":"say,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1101.54,"endTime":1106.31,"body":"there is no problem the problem"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1101.54,"endTime":1106.31,"body":"you perceive is not real. And to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1106.31,"endTime":1109.22,"body":"the extent that there may be a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1106.31,"endTime":1109.22,"body":"problem, like I'll give you that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1109.25,"endTime":1112.79,"body":"you're the problem. That's what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1109.25,"endTime":1112.79,"body":"it really that's, that's gas."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1112.79,"endTime":1116.15,"body":"Yes. And a lot of people that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1112.79,"endTime":1116.15,"body":"reach out to me with that are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1116.18,"endTime":1118.49,"body":"codependence are, they're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1116.18,"endTime":1118.49,"body":"struggling with an addict in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1118.49,"endTime":1121.67,"body":"their life. They're constantly"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1118.49,"endTime":1121.67,"body":"saying, I'm being blamed for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1121.67,"endTime":1124.31,"body":"everything. And I'm tired of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1121.67,"endTime":1124.31,"body":"being blamed for saying crazy"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1124.31,"endTime":1127.37,"body":"because their instincts are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1124.31,"endTime":1127.37,"body":"telling them I didn't do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1127.37,"endTime":1130.64,"body":"anything. But then they start"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1127.37,"endTime":1130.64,"body":"questioning their reality like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1130.64,"endTime":1134.42,"body":"Well, did I do something? I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1130.64,"endTime":1134.42,"body":"don't know. That's where it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1134.42,"endTime":1136.97,"body":"like, okay, something's wrong."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1134.42,"endTime":1136.97,"body":"Something's not right here."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1137.0,"endTime":1140.24,"body":"Yeah. And like we mentioned,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1137.0,"endTime":1140.24,"body":"this is an earmark of someone"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1140.3,"endTime":1144.83,"body":"who has a narcissistic"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1140.3,"endTime":1144.83,"body":"personality trait, but addicts I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1144.83,"endTime":1148.49,"body":"think, fall into this weird gray"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1144.83,"endTime":1148.49,"body":"area of narcissism. I don't know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1148.49,"endTime":1151.52,"body":"what you even call it. But I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1148.49,"endTime":1151.52,"body":"know that I took on a lot of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1151.52,"endTime":1154.82,"body":"these and I'm not listen, I've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1151.52,"endTime":1154.82,"body":"never been diagnosed"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1154.82,"endTime":1157.58,"body":"narcissistic, I'm, I've taken"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1154.82,"endTime":1157.58,"body":"many tests, because I'm curious"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1157.58,"endTime":1160.22,"body":"myself. I'm not a narcissist."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1157.58,"endTime":1160.22,"body":"But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1161.57,"endTime":1164.03,"body":"it is a spectrum, right. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1161.57,"endTime":1164.03,"body":"everyone has degrees of it. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1164.03,"endTime":1166.52,"body":"I think that there's something"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1164.03,"endTime":1166.52,"body":"about living in addiction, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1166.52,"endTime":1171.2,"body":"when your mind has been hijacked"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1166.52,"endTime":1171.2,"body":"that way that you take on a lot"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1171.2,"endTime":1174.26,"body":"of the attributes of someone"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1171.2,"endTime":1174.26,"body":"whose full blown narcissist."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1174.29,"endTime":1177.11,"body":"Yeah, so which is pretty much I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1174.29,"endTime":1177.11,"body":"mean, we kind of covered all"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1177.11,"endTime":1182.21,"body":"that. Yeah. And so what I would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1177.11,"endTime":1182.21,"body":"do, like you've mentioned"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1182.24,"endTime":1184.64,"body":"denying or minimizing the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1182.24,"endTime":1184.64,"body":"addiction, so just downplaying"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1184.64,"endTime":1187.46,"body":"the severity of it. Yeah. For"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1184.64,"endTime":1187.46,"body":"me, it was the you didn't even"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1187.46,"endTime":1190.28,"body":"know it existed. So I just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1187.46,"endTime":1190.28,"body":"completely denied his existence."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1190.49,"endTime":1191.81,"body":"And just basically you had to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1192.98,"endTime":1195.17,"body":"in doing that, you basically had"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1192.98,"endTime":1195.17,"body":"to come to terms with Okay,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1195.17,"endTime":1197.99,"body":"well, if he's not on drugs, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1195.17,"endTime":1197.99,"body":"he's just an aihole Yeah, this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1197.99,"endTime":1199.97,"body":"guy's just work for us. It just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1200.0,"endTime":1204.26,"body":"Sighs he just saw I said, that's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1200.0,"endTime":1204.26,"body":"for so long. Yeah, making you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1204.26,"endTime":1206.84,"body":"question your observations. Like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1204.26,"endTime":1206.84,"body":"you're off today. Like, you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1206.84,"endTime":1208.97,"body":"slow today, like, what's up with"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1206.84,"endTime":1208.97,"body":"you? And like, What are you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1208.97,"endTime":1211.7,"body":"talking about? I'm perfectly"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1208.97,"endTime":1211.7,"body":"fine. I'm tired or you know,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1211.7,"endTime":1215.3,"body":"making stuff up. But you were"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1211.7,"endTime":1215.3,"body":"right on the money. By the way,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1215.33,"endTime":1219.56,"body":"you were always on the money."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1215.33,"endTime":1219.56,"body":"Trust your instincts. FML Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1219.56,"endTime":1220.04,"body":"so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1221.21,"endTime":1225.26,"body":"addicts also shift blame on to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1221.21,"endTime":1225.26,"body":"other people, and we make others"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1225.26,"endTime":1228.83,"body":"feel responsible for the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1225.26,"endTime":1228.83,"body":"addiction, or its consequences."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1229.7,"endTime":1232.73,"body":"It's just, they avoid. Like I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1229.7,"endTime":1232.73,"body":"said, there's like this weird"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1232.73,"endTime":1234.83,"body":"gray area where like, we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1232.73,"endTime":1234.83,"body":"trying to avoid personal"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1234.83,"endTime":1236.9,"body":"accountability, which is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1234.83,"endTime":1236.9,"body":"something else narcissists do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1236.9,"endTime":1240.47,"body":"but for me, it was in order to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1236.9,"endTime":1240.47,"body":"keep the guys going in order to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1240.47,"endTime":1243.83,"body":"keep this going. Because if I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1240.47,"endTime":1243.83,"body":"got caught, it had to end and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1243.83,"endTime":1246.35,"body":"then I had to face a lot of hard"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1243.83,"endTime":1246.35,"body":"truths about myself, which is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1246.35,"endTime":1249.32,"body":"the difference between someone"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1246.35,"endTime":1249.32,"body":"with full blown narcissism some"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1249.32,"endTime":1252.47,"body":"with addiction. We also"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1249.32,"endTime":1252.47,"body":"manipulate emotions. I did this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1252.5,"endTime":1256.28,"body":"all the freaking time. Just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1252.5,"endTime":1256.28,"body":"using emotional manipulation"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1256.28,"endTime":1259.01,"body":"tactics, like I described"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1256.28,"endTime":1259.01,"body":"earlier about making you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1260.06,"endTime":1263.42,"body":"feel like you feel like crazy"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1260.06,"endTime":1263.42,"body":"for raising concerns about these"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1263.45,"endTime":1266.15,"body":"really, basically what in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1263.45,"endTime":1266.15,"body":"world was that means I got an"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1266.15,"endTime":1266.69,"body":"email."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1268.25,"endTime":1272.0,"body":"Turn it off. This is real life."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1268.25,"endTime":1272.0,"body":"This is real life. This is this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1272.0,"endTime":1272.12,"body":"is."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1273.32,"endTime":1276.08,"body":"I don't know why that freaks you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1273.32,"endTime":1276.08,"body":"out. We're, we're like the one"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1276.08,"endTime":1280.16,"body":"take podcasters. So like what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1276.08,"endTime":1280.16,"body":"you guys hear is unedited. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1280.19,"endTime":1283.01,"body":"but And here's the thing,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1280.19,"endTime":1283.01,"body":"though, if we we do that,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1283.01,"endTime":1285.47,"body":"because if we stopped right now,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1283.01,"endTime":1285.47,"body":"and we started over, we would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1285.47,"endTime":1288.35,"body":"forget what we've said. And then"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1285.47,"endTime":1288.35,"body":"it would be a total stream of"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1288.35,"endTime":1290.45,"body":"conscious I want the real"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1288.35,"endTime":1290.45,"body":"conversation, the odd like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1290.45,"endTime":1293.54,"body":"we're all about authenticity."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1290.45,"endTime":1293.54,"body":"This is what you get with us. We"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1293.54,"endTime":1296.63,"body":"don't go back and pull stuff out"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1293.54,"endTime":1296.63,"body":"ever. I've never done that in a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1296.63,"endTime":1299.33,"body":"podcast. It just is what it I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1296.63,"endTime":1299.33,"body":"think we've moved things around."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1299.48,"endTime":1301.97,"body":"Have we we did something one"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1299.48,"endTime":1301.97,"body":"time, but it could have been"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1302.0,"endTime":1304.16,"body":"like, because there was some"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1302.0,"endTime":1304.16,"body":"stupid that happened in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1304.16,"endTime":1308.6,"body":"background. The dog probably no,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1304.16,"endTime":1308.6,"body":"but the dog is fine. Whatever."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1308.6,"endTime":1312.35,"body":"Okay, well, this is genuine. we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1308.6,"endTime":1312.35,"body":"distort facts or events as an"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1312.35,"endTime":1316.04,"body":"act. I did this all the time. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1312.35,"endTime":1316.04,"body":"would manipulate facts, which is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1316.04,"endTime":1319.31,"body":"like, that's a loaded term,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1316.04,"endTime":1319.31,"body":"isn't it? Because if you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1319.31,"endTime":1321.38,"body":"manipulating facts, aren't they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1319.31,"endTime":1321.38,"body":"just not facts? You're just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1321.38,"endTime":1325.01,"body":"lying? Yeah. So another way to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1321.38,"endTime":1325.01,"body":"say this is we just lie. We lie"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1325.01,"endTime":1328.19,"body":"a lot. We make it really hard"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1325.01,"endTime":1328.19,"body":"for other people to hold us"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1328.19,"endTime":1335.24,"body":"accountable. We are masters at"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1328.19,"endTime":1335.24,"body":"avoiding accountability in any"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1335.24,"endTime":1339.29,"body":"way I could do that. So it okay,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1335.24,"endTime":1339.29,"body":"we've got more weird noises."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1339.29,"endTime":1343.64,"body":"Now. I think there's fireworks."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1339.29,"endTime":1343.64,"body":"Oh, these are fireworks. Okay,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1343.64,"endTime":1345.77,"body":"well, if you can hear fireworks"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1343.64,"endTime":1345.77,"body":"in the background forgive us."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1345.98,"endTime":1350.36,"body":"But it was always a way to keep"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1345.98,"endTime":1350.36,"body":"the lie going. So it was always"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1350.42,"endTime":1353.57,"body":"desperate effort to keep this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1350.42,"endTime":1353.57,"body":"going. So this is something that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1353.57,"endTime":1356.66,"body":"we the obvious question, this is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1353.57,"endTime":1356.66,"body":"like, okay, yeah, I get it. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1356.66,"endTime":1361.01,"body":"relate. What the hell do I do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1356.66,"endTime":1361.01,"body":"about this? What do I do? Paige,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1361.01,"endTime":1364.13,"body":"what do we do? Well, first"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1361.01,"endTime":1364.13,"body":"recognize the behavior, which is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1364.13,"endTime":1366.95,"body":"kind of hard to do sometimes."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1364.13,"endTime":1366.95,"body":"Because if you've been beat down"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1366.95,"endTime":1369.08,"body":"for so long, you're like, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1366.95,"endTime":1369.08,"body":"don't know what's right or wrong"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1369.08,"endTime":1373.01,"body":"anymore. But it's the first step"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1369.08,"endTime":1373.01,"body":"to like, look at it, you know,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1373.01,"endTime":1376.97,"body":"understand the manipulative"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1373.01,"endTime":1376.97,"body":"tactics that are being used, or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1376.97,"endTime":1380.84,"body":"that they're not your fault. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1376.97,"endTime":1380.84,"body":"they're just meant to undermine"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1380.84,"endTime":1384.32,"body":"your perception of reality. This"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1380.84,"endTime":1384.32,"body":"is something that's tougher when"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1384.32,"endTime":1386.39,"body":"you're dealing with someone"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1384.32,"endTime":1386.39,"body":"who's just a narcissistic"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1386.39,"endTime":1391.7,"body":"personality, is that it's not as"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1386.39,"endTime":1391.7,"body":"apparent when they're doing it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1391.7,"endTime":1394.31,"body":"But when an addict is doing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1391.7,"endTime":1394.31,"body":"Yeah, you have signs because you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1394.31,"endTime":1398.06,"body":"know, they're using right so you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1394.31,"endTime":1398.06,"body":"know, what the abuse can do to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1398.09,"endTime":1400.97,"body":"their mentality, right. So if"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1398.09,"endTime":1400.97,"body":"you know they're using then"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1400.97,"endTime":1401.96,"body":"what's the next one?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1403.25,"endTime":1405.95,"body":"The next one on your list? Oh,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1403.25,"endTime":1405.95,"body":"trust your instinct. Oh, if you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1405.95,"endTime":1409.1,"body":"know they're using trust your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1405.95,"endTime":1409.1,"body":"instinct. Yes, yes, yes. Yes,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1409.1,"endTime":1412.43,"body":"you are correct. You're right."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1409.1,"endTime":1412.43,"body":"Your feelings are valid. Don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1412.43,"endTime":1415.85,"body":"make them think don't let them"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1412.43,"endTime":1415.85,"body":"make you think they're held your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1415.85,"endTime":1419.03,"body":"own truth, even if they're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1415.85,"endTime":1419.03,"body":"trying to convince you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1419.03,"endTime":1421.1,"body":"otherwise. And they will,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1419.03,"endTime":1421.1,"body":"because that's what we deal with"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1421.1,"endTime":1423.62,"body":"all the time with y'all. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1425.0,"endTime":1427.88,"body":"Seek support, talk to your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1425.0,"endTime":1427.88,"body":"friends or family. Sometimes you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1427.88,"endTime":1431.24,"body":"need to get an objective"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1427.88,"endTime":1431.24,"body":"perspective. And somebody who's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1431.24,"endTime":1433.94,"body":"going to listen to you because"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1431.24,"endTime":1433.94,"body":"when you share your experiences"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1433.94,"endTime":1436.4,"body":"with someone who understands"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1433.94,"endTime":1436.4,"body":"they can help validate your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1436.4,"endTime":1438.62,"body":"feelings and give you the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1436.4,"endTime":1438.62,"body":"strength to address the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1438.62,"endTime":1441.92,"body":"situation. The Tufo community is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1438.62,"endTime":1441.92,"body":"a good place to get this very,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1441.92,"endTime":1444.47,"body":"very, very good community. This"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1441.92,"endTime":1444.47,"body":"is places where you get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1444.47,"endTime":1446.9,"body":"validated. Absolutely, that's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1444.47,"endTime":1446.9,"body":"what it's there for y'all."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1446.93,"endTime":1449.06,"body":"That's what it's for. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1446.93,"endTime":1449.06,"body":"Because a lot of people don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1449.06,"endTime":1451.16,"body":"know they're being gaslighted"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1449.06,"endTime":1451.16,"body":"until they talk to somebody"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1451.16,"endTime":1454.4,"body":"else. And they're like, Oh,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1451.16,"endTime":1454.4,"body":"that's not normal behavior or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1454.4,"endTime":1457.4,"body":"yeah, you're you're not crazy"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1454.4,"endTime":1457.4,"body":"for feeling the way that you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1457.4,"endTime":1462.41,"body":"feel right? Okay, number four,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1457.4,"endTime":1462.41,"body":"this is something that I do is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1462.41,"endTime":1467.21,"body":"maintain a record. So keep a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1462.41,"endTime":1467.21,"body":"journal or document incidents"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1467.24,"endTime":1471.53,"body":"that you where you felt felt"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1467.24,"endTime":1471.53,"body":"like they were gaslighting you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1471.98,"endTime":1476.93,"body":"and include the dates, the times"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1471.98,"endTime":1476.93,"body":"your specific examples. This is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1476.96,"endTime":1480.74,"body":"like it is going to show us"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1476.96,"endTime":1480.74,"body":"evidence for the behavior. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1480.74,"endTime":1484.58,"body":"it's for me it was to help"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1480.74,"endTime":1484.58,"body":"maintain clarity. I think, to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1484.58,"endTime":1488.69,"body":"validate my experience, like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1484.58,"endTime":1488.69,"body":"when the doubt arises, that was"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1488.69,"endTime":1491.48,"body":"the most important part about"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1488.69,"endTime":1491.48,"body":"maintaining the records such a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1491.48,"endTime":1494.66,"body":"good idea. It's not to throw it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1491.48,"endTime":1494.66,"body":"in somebody's face and say, hey,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1494.66,"endTime":1496.85,"body":"look, because that ain't gonna"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1494.66,"endTime":1496.85,"body":"work out with people who are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1496.85,"endTime":1499.94,"body":"doing it. It's a way to recall"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1496.85,"endTime":1499.94,"body":"the events and be like, okay,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1500.0,"endTime":1503.0,"body":"I'm justified, justified like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1500.0,"endTime":1503.0,"body":"I'm these my feelings are valid."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1503.0,"endTime":1505.37,"body":"I'm not crazy. But like I said,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1503.0,"endTime":1505.37,"body":"if you're showing this to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1505.37,"endTime":1507.56,"body":"somebody who is mentally"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1505.37,"endTime":1507.56,"body":"unstable and who's doing this to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1507.56,"endTime":1509.42,"body":"you, they're just going to spin"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1507.56,"endTime":1509.42,"body":"you around and make you feel"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1509.42,"endTime":1513.17,"body":"even more dumb. So that is the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1509.42,"endTime":1513.17,"body":"difference between a scuze us is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1513.17,"endTime":1517.94,"body":"the difference between someone"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1513.17,"endTime":1517.94,"body":"who is narcissist and not. So a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1517.94,"endTime":1520.88,"body":"narcissist will once you tell"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1517.94,"endTime":1520.88,"body":"them your experience, they will"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1520.88,"endTime":1524.12,"body":"invalidate your experience they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1520.88,"endTime":1524.12,"body":"will say that is not your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1524.12,"endTime":1526.88,"body":"experience. That is not what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1524.12,"endTime":1526.88,"body":"happened. That is not true. That"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1526.88,"endTime":1531.47,"body":"didn't happen. This list helps"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1526.88,"endTime":1531.47,"body":"you maintain clarity that these"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1531.47,"endTime":1534.59,"body":"things events occurred. All"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1531.47,"endTime":1534.59,"body":"right, and you have dates times"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1534.59,"endTime":1537.68,"body":"you have whatever. If you tell"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1534.59,"endTime":1537.68,"body":"them these things happen, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1537.68,"endTime":1540.05,"body":"know what's going to happen?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1537.68,"endTime":1540.05,"body":"Nothing. Yeah, they will"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1540.05,"endTime":1542.99,"body":"continue to spin a web of lies"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1540.05,"endTime":1542.99,"body":"and make you think you're crazy,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1542.99,"endTime":1546.98,"body":"right? A sane person would they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1542.99,"endTime":1546.98,"body":"would hold space for you, at the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1546.98,"endTime":1550.64,"body":"very least to say, Okay, I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1546.98,"endTime":1550.64,"body":"understand that you felt that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1550.64,"endTime":1553.04,"body":"that was the way your reality"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1550.64,"endTime":1553.04,"body":"was, and I can respect that."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1553.07,"endTime":1555.41,"body":"Yeah, that's what a sane person"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1553.07,"endTime":1555.41,"body":"would do. Even if they disagree"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1555.41,"endTime":1558.29,"body":"with you. They would give you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1555.41,"endTime":1558.29,"body":"that. Yeah, a narcissist and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1558.29,"endTime":1562.94,"body":"addicts most likely will not."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1558.29,"endTime":1562.94,"body":"Yeah, it's tough. Another thing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1562.94,"endTime":1564.98,"body":"we can do here, and we've talked"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1562.94,"endTime":1564.98,"body":"about this more times than I can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1564.98,"endTime":1567.77,"body":"count now is setting boundaries"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1564.98,"endTime":1567.77,"body":"here, establishing clear"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1567.77,"endTime":1570.29,"body":"boundaries with the gaslighting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1567.77,"endTime":1570.29,"body":"to communicate them assertively."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1571.22,"endTime":1575.48,"body":"I just manage their behavior is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1571.22,"endTime":1575.48,"body":"unacceptable. It's all you can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1575.48,"endTime":1579.59,"body":"do. Like, listen, you're not"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1575.48,"endTime":1579.59,"body":"going to change the way that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1579.59,"endTime":1582.47,"body":"they are with a boundary. It's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1579.59,"endTime":1582.47,"body":"to protect you remember, we went"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1582.47,"endTime":1585.14,"body":"back to this and the boundaries"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1582.47,"endTime":1585.14,"body":"episode was, boundaries are"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1585.14,"endTime":1588.2,"body":"there to protect you. They're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1585.14,"endTime":1588.2,"body":"there to protect your sanity, so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1588.2,"endTime":1591.35,"body":"that you don't feel like you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1588.2,"endTime":1591.35,"body":"losing your mind. Yep. But I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1591.35,"endTime":1595.07,"body":"don't expect anyone to just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1591.35,"endTime":1595.07,"body":"change their ways. And like, oh,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1595.07,"endTime":1597.62,"body":"since you brought that up,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1595.07,"endTime":1597.62,"body":"you're right. I've been doing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1597.62,"endTime":1600.29,"body":"this to you all along, you got"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1597.62,"endTime":1600.29,"body":"me. That's just not the way this"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1600.29,"endTime":1602.66,"body":"typically works. It's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1600.29,"endTime":1602.66,"body":"unfortunate, but it's true, but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1602.69,"endTime":1605.12,"body":"set boundaries to protect"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1602.69,"endTime":1605.12,"body":"yourself. Let them know that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1605.12,"endTime":1608.45,"body":"this behavior is unacceptable."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1605.12,"endTime":1608.45,"body":"And that you will not tolerate"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1608.45,"endTime":1611.45,"body":"it. And just be consistent in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1608.45,"endTime":1611.45,"body":"enforcing them. Like make sure"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1611.45,"endTime":1615.65,"body":"that they're enforceable."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1611.45,"endTime":1615.65,"body":"Practice self care. We've got"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1615.65,"endTime":1617.66,"body":"man the you know, what's crazy"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1615.65,"endTime":1617.66,"body":"is that the remedies for a lot"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1617.66,"endTime":1620.36,"body":"of this stuff is the same. Yep."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1617.66,"endTime":1620.36,"body":"And this, this comes up all the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1620.36,"endTime":1623.15,"body":"time practicing self care. So"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1620.36,"endTime":1623.15,"body":"engaging in activities that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1623.15,"endTime":1627.23,"body":"promote your well being your"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1623.15,"endTime":1627.23,"body":"emotional well being. practice"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1627.23,"endTime":1631.04,"body":"mindfulness, engage in hobbies,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1627.23,"endTime":1631.04,"body":"what do you really like to do?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1631.61,"endTime":1635.48,"body":"therapy or counseling, seek"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1631.61,"endTime":1635.48,"body":"professional help. Prioritize"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1635.48,"endTime":1638.87,"body":"your self care, it will help you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1635.48,"endTime":1638.87,"body":"build resilience and maintain a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1638.87,"endTime":1643.13,"body":"strong sense of self. That's the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1638.87,"endTime":1643.13,"body":"point of self care. I you you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1643.13,"endTime":1645.68,"body":"don't lose yourself when you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1643.13,"endTime":1645.68,"body":"working on yourself. You can't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1645.71,"endTime":1649.37,"body":"it's impossible to do it. I love"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1645.71,"endTime":1649.37,"body":"that. It's true, though. Like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1649.37,"endTime":1652.85,"body":"you can't forget yourself and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1649.37,"endTime":1652.85,"body":"how much you matter. If you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1652.85,"endTime":1655.43,"body":"working on yourself. Yeah, it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1652.85,"endTime":1655.43,"body":"like, why am I doing this? Oh,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1655.43,"endTime":1659.42,"body":"yeah, because I effing matter."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1655.43,"endTime":1659.42,"body":"That's why That's why we do it."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1659.54,"endTime":1661.55,"body":"That's why you get out and you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1659.54,"endTime":1661.55,"body":"go hiking, because you love"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1661.55,"endTime":1663.68,"body":"hiking, or you like gardening or"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1661.55,"endTime":1663.68,"body":"whatever it is that you'd like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1663.68,"endTime":1667.88,"body":"to do. Prioritize yourself,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1663.68,"endTime":1667.88,"body":"because you are being gaslit, to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1667.88,"endTime":1671.39,"body":"feel like to believe that you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1667.88,"endTime":1671.39,"body":"don't matter gaslighted, I don't"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1671.39,"endTime":1674.15,"body":"know, we'll get to this. I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1671.39,"endTime":1674.15,"body":"wonder how many times we've said"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1674.15,"endTime":1677.57,"body":"it and changed it. As mentioned"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1674.15,"endTime":1677.57,"body":"previously."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1678.71,"endTime":1681.2,"body":"The next one we've got here is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1678.71,"endTime":1681.2,"body":"seek professional help if"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1681.2,"endTime":1685.13,"body":"needed. So this is an incredibly"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1681.2,"endTime":1685.13,"body":"tough thing to live through,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1685.64,"endTime":1689.6,"body":"were doubly tough, and it comes"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1685.64,"endTime":1689.6,"body":"up. And it's not just unique to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1689.6,"endTime":1693.41,"body":"an addict relationship, it's you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1689.6,"endTime":1693.41,"body":"it's not it happens with people"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1693.41,"endTime":1695.78,"body":"who aren't necessarily addicts,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1693.41,"endTime":1695.78,"body":"some people just have this type"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1695.78,"endTime":1698.81,"body":"of personality. And this is one"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1695.78,"endTime":1698.81,"body":"of the things that they will do."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1699.38,"endTime":1703.31,"body":"It can also occur in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1699.38,"endTime":1703.31,"body":"workplace, which is one of the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1703.31,"endTime":1706.07,"body":"toughest places it can occur"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1703.31,"endTime":1706.07,"body":"because it's allowed to occur"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1706.07,"endTime":1709.58,"body":"because of the hierarchy that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1706.07,"endTime":1709.58,"body":"exists. And the subordination"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1709.58,"endTime":1712.64,"body":"that exists. This happens, and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1709.58,"endTime":1712.64,"body":"I've seen this happen in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1712.64,"endTime":1716.0,"body":"professional world. It's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1712.64,"endTime":1716.0,"body":"difficult if this happens, the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1716.0,"endTime":1719.0,"body":"professional world man, like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1716.0,"endTime":1719.0,"body":"what are you going to do? You're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1719.0,"endTime":1721.4,"body":"gonna go tattle on your boss and"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1719.0,"endTime":1721.4,"body":"see how that goes for you."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1721.61,"endTime":1724.4,"body":"Right? Like, it's really, really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1721.61,"endTime":1724.4,"body":"tough. But anyway, so seeking"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1724.4,"endTime":1726.86,"body":"professional help, therapy."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1729.5,"endTime":1733.46,"body":"Counseling, I would, I would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1729.5,"endTime":1733.46,"body":"lean more toward that I would"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1733.46,"endTime":1735.98,"body":"stay away from like, like, we're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1733.46,"endTime":1735.98,"body":"not going to be able to help you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1735.98,"endTime":1738.56,"body":"with this necessarily. Like we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1735.98,"endTime":1738.56,"body":"can help you with the self care"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1738.56,"endTime":1741.23,"body":"piece of this thing. But when it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1738.56,"endTime":1741.23,"body":"comes to like, how do I deal"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1741.23,"endTime":1744.83,"body":"with the mental gymnastics that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1741.23,"endTime":1744.83,"body":"I have that I flow through every"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1744.83,"endTime":1747.86,"body":"single day trying to feel like"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1744.83,"endTime":1747.86,"body":"I'm valid, like that's seek a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1747.86,"endTime":1751.04,"body":"professional and get their help?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1747.86,"endTime":1751.04,"body":"Because this stuff's very"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1751.04,"endTime":1753.44,"body":"difficult. Like in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1751.04,"endTime":1753.44,"body":"workplace, you can go up to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1753.44,"endTime":1755.75,"body":"someone after the fact after a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1753.44,"endTime":1755.75,"body":"meeting and tell them like, Hey,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1755.75,"endTime":1758.69,"body":"I saw what happened. I want you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1755.75,"endTime":1758.69,"body":"to know that you're not crazy."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1759.68,"endTime":1762.47,"body":"And your feelings are valid."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1759.68,"endTime":1762.47,"body":"That's exactly what happened the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1762.47,"endTime":1765.56,"body":"way you described it. The way"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1762.47,"endTime":1765.56,"body":"that that person just spoke to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1765.56,"endTime":1768.23,"body":"you is unacceptable. You can"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1765.56,"endTime":1768.23,"body":"validate people, but that person"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1768.23,"endTime":1772.07,"body":"is going to have to live with"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1768.23,"endTime":1772.07,"body":"that. Like, I urge anyone who's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1772.07,"endTime":1774.29,"body":"dealing with this to get help."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1772.07,"endTime":1774.29,"body":"This is what you had done. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1774.29,"endTime":1777.5,"body":"this is what I had done in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1774.29,"endTime":1777.5,"body":"same situations and it helped me"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1777.53,"endTime":1779.81,"body":"a ton. Yeah, it's it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1777.53,"endTime":1779.81,"body":"invaluable."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1781.19,"endTime":1783.65,"body":"Like this last one. This last"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1781.19,"endTime":1783.65,"body":"one is great, man. This is where"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1783.65,"endTime":1787.13,"body":"this is my first one, right?"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1783.65,"endTime":1787.13,"body":"Consider ending the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1787.13,"endTime":1787.88,"body":"relationship."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1791.75,"endTime":1795.71,"body":"I don't mean to demean that. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1791.75,"endTime":1795.71,"body":"let's just listen to everything"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1795.71,"endTime":1798.5,"body":"for the last 30 minutes. We've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1795.71,"endTime":1798.5,"body":"just walked you through. This is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1798.5,"endTime":1799.52,"body":"what you go through"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1800.0,"endTime":1803.9,"body":"consider ending the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1800.0,"endTime":1803.9,"body":"relationship. If this continues,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1803.93,"endTime":1807.98,"body":"despite your efforts to address"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1803.93,"endTime":1807.98,"body":"it, if they choose to keep doing"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1807.98,"endTime":1811.52,"body":"this, nothing will change."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1807.98,"endTime":1811.52,"body":"Nothing will change. If this is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1811.52,"endTime":1816.2,"body":"causing you significant harm, it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1811.52,"endTime":1816.2,"body":"may be necessary to distance"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1816.2,"endTime":1821.24,"body":"yourself or just in this thing."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1816.2,"endTime":1821.24,"body":"I just, I want everyone that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1821.51,"endTime":1825.29,"body":"comes into contact with us to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1821.51,"endTime":1825.29,"body":"know how incredible they really"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1825.29,"endTime":1829.91,"body":"are, how amazing they are, how"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1825.29,"endTime":1829.91,"body":"valid they are, how special they"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1829.91,"endTime":1832.31,"body":"are. And I wish that everyone"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1829.91,"endTime":1832.31,"body":"would know that I wish I could"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1832.31,"endTime":1835.31,"body":"just plug them into my brain for"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1832.31,"endTime":1835.31,"body":"a moment so they could see them."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1835.49,"endTime":1838.4,"body":"So they could see themselves the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1835.49,"endTime":1838.4,"body":"way that I see them. When I talk"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1838.4,"endTime":1841.94,"body":"to them. I interact with them."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1838.4,"endTime":1841.94,"body":"You matter, dammit, Quit letting"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1841.94,"endTime":1845.15,"body":"these people treat you this way."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1841.94,"endTime":1845.15,"body":"And I know that's easier said"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1845.15,"endTime":1847.79,"body":"than done. I don't I don't mean"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1845.15,"endTime":1847.79,"body":"to make that sound like it's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1847.79,"endTime":1849.2,"body":"just like, I know, it's like,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1847.79,"endTime":1849.2,"body":"okay, you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1850.73,"endTime":1854.48,"body":"know, I know it's tough. I just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1850.73,"endTime":1854.48,"body":"I want you to know that you're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1854.48,"endTime":1858.41,"body":"loved. You're valid, you matter."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1854.48,"endTime":1858.41,"body":"It's all right. Everything that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1858.41,"endTime":1863.21,"body":"you've felt is correct. Okay."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1858.41,"endTime":1863.21,"body":"It's, it's correct. It's okay."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1863.69,"endTime":1867.14,"body":"It's tough. I know. But anyway,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1863.69,"endTime":1867.14,"body":"I hope this gave some clarity to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1867.14,"endTime":1867.62,"body":"this."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1869.15,"endTime":1874.43,"body":"I'm sorry, I'm distracted by the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1869.15,"endTime":1874.43,"body":"kid. I just, I totally block it"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1874.43,"endTime":1877.1,"body":"out. You're great at that. I'm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1874.43,"endTime":1877.1,"body":"not man that doesn't really do"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1877.1,"endTime":1880.31,"body":"to do. I'm like squirrel"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1877.1,"endTime":1880.31,"body":"squirrel. And I run off and I"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1880.31,"endTime":1881.87,"body":"just chase shiny objects. But"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1883.76,"endTime":1884.48,"body":"here's"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1885.5,"endTime":1888.95,"body":"am on, Ben, it's humid in here"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1885.5,"endTime":1888.95,"body":"telling you but"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1889.97,"endTime":1894.59,"body":"I see this term thrown around so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1889.97,"endTime":1894.59,"body":"much. And I just I wanted to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1894.59,"endTime":1897.08,"body":"bring a little bit of clarity to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1894.59,"endTime":1897.08,"body":"it because it sort of drives me"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1897.08,"endTime":1900.71,"body":"nuts. Because if you've ever"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1897.08,"endTime":1900.71,"body":"been in a situation where you've"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1900.74,"endTime":1905.21,"body":"actually been gaslit you know"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1900.74,"endTime":1905.21,"body":"how damaging this can be. And"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1905.21,"endTime":1908.48,"body":"when someone's arguing about the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1905.21,"endTime":1908.48,"body":"coffee thing like the coffee"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1908.48,"endTime":1911.15,"body":"example like that's demeaning to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1908.48,"endTime":1911.15,"body":"people who have actually been"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1911.15,"endTime":1913.91,"body":"through this Okay, let's all"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1911.15,"endTime":1913.91,"body":"come to an understanding of what"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1913.91,"endTime":1916.79,"body":"this actually is. And let's pick"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1913.91,"endTime":1916.79,"body":"a different term for when you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1916.79,"endTime":1919.97,"body":"disagree with somebody You're a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1916.79,"endTime":1919.97,"body":"pain in the ass is a better way"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1919.97,"endTime":1922.46,"body":"of putting it the same. You're"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1919.97,"endTime":1922.46,"body":"gaslighting. You're not being"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1922.46,"endTime":1925.61,"body":"your realness, you're not being"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1922.46,"endTime":1925.61,"body":"gassed. That person is just"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1925.61,"endTime":1928.79,"body":"difficult. They're a pain in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1925.61,"endTime":1928.79,"body":"ass. That's fair to say. But to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1928.79,"endTime":1931.01,"body":"say that they're psychologically"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1928.79,"endTime":1931.01,"body":"manipulating you to make you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1931.01,"endTime":1934.46,"body":"think that your reality is is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1931.01,"endTime":1934.46,"body":"distorted is not what's actually"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1934.46,"endTime":1937.4,"body":"happening here. It's just not so"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1934.46,"endTime":1937.4,"body":"I wanted to bring some clarity"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1937.4,"endTime":1940.94,"body":"to that. I also wanted to send"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1937.4,"endTime":1940.94,"body":"love and support and hugs to"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1940.94,"endTime":1944.45,"body":"anyone that is dealing with"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1940.94,"endTime":1944.45,"body":"this. And you can come to the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1944.45,"endTime":1947.48,"body":"Tufo community, you can get"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1944.45,"endTime":1947.48,"body":"validated. But I think more than"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1947.48,"endTime":1950.21,"body":"that, there's going to be a lot"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1947.48,"endTime":1950.21,"body":"of damage and wreckage that"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1950.21,"endTime":1952.25,"body":"you're going to have to clean up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1950.21,"endTime":1952.25,"body":"with the professional. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1952.76,"endTime":1955.52,"body":"we've also got recommendations"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1952.76,"endTime":1955.52,"body":"if you want to reach out to us,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1955.55,"endTime":1958.46,"body":"especially if you're in the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1955.55,"endTime":1958.46,"body":"state of Texas, on a great firm"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1958.46,"endTime":1960.47,"body":"that can help you with that be"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1958.46,"endTime":1960.47,"body":"more than happy to put you in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1960.47,"endTime":1961.97,"body":"touch with a tailor counseling"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1960.47,"endTime":1961.97,"body":"group."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1963.98,"endTime":1968.54,"body":"I think that's it, right. Okay,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1963.98,"endTime":1968.54,"body":"well, we are going to go head up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1968.54,"endTime":1972.2,"body":"to the northeast disappear in"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1968.54,"endTime":1972.2,"body":"some nice, cool weather for a"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1972.2,"endTime":1975.44,"body":"little bit. Get some awesome"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1972.2,"endTime":1975.44,"body":"work done. And in the meantime,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1975.44,"endTime":1978.14,"body":"I hope to hear from some of you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1975.44,"endTime":1978.14,"body":"guys, you can send us messages,"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1978.14,"endTime":1980.96,"body":"ask us questions. Hope to see"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1978.14,"endTime":1980.96,"body":"you pop in the community. You"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1980.96,"endTime":1984.59,"body":"can check us out on our"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1980.96,"endTime":1984.59,"body":"website@www.tufo.com where you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1984.59,"endTime":1989.51,"body":"can find some awesome guides. We"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1984.59,"endTime":1989.51,"body":"are betcha pages stop taking on"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1989.51,"endTime":1993.47,"body":"new clients because that got"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1989.51,"endTime":1993.47,"body":"crazy quickly. Yes, we got full"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1993.53,"endTime":1996.23,"body":"very quick. So it's not that we"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1993.53,"endTime":1996.23,"body":"don't want to help anybody. It"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1996.23,"endTime":1999.71,"body":"got full very quickly. So keep"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1996.23,"endTime":1999.71,"body":"an eye out. If it opens back up"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1999.71,"endTime":2001.42,"body":"election. We'll probably"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":1999.71,"endTime":2001.42,"body":"announce it on our social media"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2001.42,"endTime":2004.39,"body":"accounts. We'll put in the story"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2001.42,"endTime":2004.39,"body":"or something. Yeah. In the"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2004.39,"endTime":2007.45,"body":"meantime, hope your day is"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2004.39,"endTime":2007.45,"body":"amazing. Hope you are well."},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2008.05,"endTime":2010.93,"body":"Until next time, I imagine we'll"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2008.05,"endTime":2010.93,"body":"see you"},{"speaker":"Unknown","startTime":2017.86,"endTime":2017.95,"body":"Soon"}]}