{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":0.0,"endTime":2.25,"body":"That sounds pretty toxic"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":0.0,"endTime":2.25,"body":"to grill"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2.28,"endTime":5.64,"body":"how we speak. Like we"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2.28,"endTime":5.64,"body":"have strong opinions on this,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":5.82,"endTime":9.48,"body":"man. It's it's sorry, it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":5.82,"endTime":9.48,"body":"gonna be honest Sorry. It's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":10.17,"endTime":12.63,"body":"too full authenticity."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":10.17,"endTime":12.63,"body":"You're right, something that we"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":12.63,"endTime":16.53,"body":"don't condone, I think it's,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":12.63,"endTime":16.53,"body":"it's icky. And it's gross. And"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":16.53,"endTime":19.74,"body":"if that's what you do, you might"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":16.53,"endTime":19.74,"body":"want to question something, you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":19.74,"endTime":20.79,"body":"might want to question that."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":23.52,"endTime":29.19,"body":"Welcome back, well come"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":23.52,"endTime":29.19,"body":"back to another episode of till"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":29.19,"endTime":33.09,"body":"the wheels fall off. I'm Matt."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":29.19,"endTime":33.09,"body":"And we are picking up right"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":33.09,"endTime":36.63,"body":"where we left off from last week"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":33.09,"endTime":36.63,"body":"in our boundaries series, a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":36.63,"endTime":39.69,"body":"three part series. This is part"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":36.63,"endTime":39.69,"body":"two, following up part one from"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":39.69,"endTime":42.24,"body":"last week. If you haven't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":39.69,"endTime":42.24,"body":"already heard that one, I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":42.24,"endTime":44.76,"body":"suggest you go back and check"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":42.24,"endTime":44.76,"body":"that one out. So that this makes"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":44.76,"endTime":46.05,"body":"some sort of sense to you."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":47.43,"endTime":50.7,"body":"So last week, we covered what"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":47.43,"endTime":50.7,"body":"are your values, what your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":50.7,"endTime":53.34,"body":"values are? And that's where we"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":50.7,"endTime":53.34,"body":"start when it comes to setting"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":53.34,"endTime":56.37,"body":"any kind of boundaries, really"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":53.34,"endTime":56.37,"body":"discovering what are we about?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":57.21,"endTime":60.66,"body":"In part two? We're going to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":57.21,"endTime":60.66,"body":"discuss the opposite of them."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":60.96,"endTime":64.05,"body":"What are your anti values? The"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":60.96,"endTime":64.05,"body":"opposite of those? What are the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":64.05,"endTime":65.91,"body":"things that make you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":64.05,"endTime":65.91,"body":"uncomfortable?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":65.94,"endTime":67.26,"body":"What pisses you off?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":67.74,"endTime":72.03,"body":"And I liked it. We're"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":67.74,"endTime":72.03,"body":"going about it this way. Like I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":72.03,"endTime":74.49,"body":"said, a lot of people cover"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":72.03,"endTime":74.49,"body":"boundaries, but they don't do it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":74.49,"endTime":77.88,"body":"like this. Yeah, I think that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":74.49,"endTime":77.88,"body":"this is a very succinct and a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":77.88,"endTime":81.27,"body":"way to just make sense. As you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":77.88,"endTime":81.27,"body":"kind of roll through this, you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":81.27,"endTime":83.07,"body":"have to figure out what your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":81.27,"endTime":83.07,"body":"values are. And now let's figure"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":83.07,"endTime":87.69,"body":"out what disturbs me. What"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":83.07,"endTime":87.69,"body":"disturbs me so, and Paige put"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":87.69,"endTime":90.12,"body":"this series together, and I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":87.69,"endTime":90.12,"body":"cannot thank you enough for"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":90.12,"endTime":92.37,"body":"digging into this and doing the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":90.12,"endTime":92.37,"body":"brain damage to get us here"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":92.37,"endTime":94.32,"body":"because I think it's going to be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":92.37,"endTime":94.32,"body":"helpful for a ton of people."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":94.35,"endTime":94.59,"body":"Well, the"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":94.59,"endTime":97.56,"body":"experience helped as"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":94.59,"endTime":97.56,"body":"well, the experience, you helped"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":97.56,"endTime":98.52,"body":"thanks, I hope,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":100.17,"endTime":101.43,"body":"in a roundabout way,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":101.85,"endTime":103.32,"body":"just being with you is"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":101.85,"endTime":103.32,"body":"helped."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":104.55,"endTime":109.08,"body":"I'm the guinea pig in this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":104.55,"endTime":109.08,"body":"deal. Okay, so as discussed, we"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":109.08,"endTime":111.12,"body":"discuss values in our last"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":109.08,"endTime":111.12,"body":"episode, things that are"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":111.12,"endTime":114.3,"body":"important to us. So let's look"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":111.12,"endTime":114.3,"body":"at the actions and behaviors"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":114.3,"endTime":119.67,"body":"that make us feel uneasy or"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":114.3,"endTime":119.67,"body":"disrespected. So think of a time"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":120.63,"endTime":123.96,"body":"you were in a conversation or an"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":120.63,"endTime":123.96,"body":"argument with someone or you're"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":123.96,"endTime":127.89,"body":"in an uncomfortable situation."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":123.96,"endTime":127.89,"body":"It just made you feel awful. It"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":127.89,"endTime":131.43,"body":"made you question your reality."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":127.89,"endTime":131.43,"body":"And sometimes these are just gut"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":131.43,"endTime":133.74,"body":"feelings like something's just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":131.43,"endTime":133.74,"body":"off when you spend time with"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":133.74,"endTime":136.44,"body":"these people. Maybe you find out"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":133.74,"endTime":136.44,"body":"that they're going to be at a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":136.44,"endTime":139.35,"body":"gathering that you're going to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":136.44,"endTime":139.35,"body":"as well. And you just sort of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":139.35,"endTime":145.29,"body":"have that. Like, you know what I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":139.35,"endTime":145.29,"body":"mean that to stay in it? Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":145.32,"endTime":148.14,"body":"yeah, that feeling let's let's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":145.32,"endTime":148.14,"body":"focus on that for a moment"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":148.14,"endTime":152.1,"body":"because it is important. So"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":148.14,"endTime":152.1,"body":"Paige, walk us through some"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":152.1,"endTime":155.34,"body":"examples of what some of these"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":152.1,"endTime":155.34,"body":"things are some of these actions"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":155.34,"endTime":157.44,"body":"that make us uncomfortable, cuz"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":155.34,"endTime":157.44,"body":"I think on the surface level, we"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":157.44,"endTime":160.77,"body":"all know what it feels like. But"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":157.44,"endTime":160.77,"body":"it's really hard, especially as"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":160.77,"endTime":164.91,"body":"a codependent to focus on what"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":160.77,"endTime":164.91,"body":"the actual action was. Because"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":164.91,"endTime":168.03,"body":"first of all, we don't know who"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":164.91,"endTime":168.03,"body":"we are, what we stand for. So"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":168.03,"endTime":170.91,"body":"once you've done that, and let's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":168.03,"endTime":170.91,"body":"discuss some of these the actual"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":170.91,"endTime":172.59,"body":"things that cause the angst."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":172.71,"endTime":176.97,"body":"Okay, so the first one is"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":172.71,"endTime":176.97,"body":"yelling or shouting at someone."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":178.14,"endTime":180.87,"body":"Yeah, we have a lot of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":178.14,"endTime":180.87,"body":"experience with that one."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":181.35,"endTime":185.1,"body":"Jeez, do we ever. I don't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":181.35,"endTime":185.1,"body":"want to derail us too quickly"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":185.1,"endTime":187.23,"body":"here, because I know we just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":185.1,"endTime":187.23,"body":"started the episode. Now we're"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":187.23,"endTime":189.15,"body":"gonna go through example,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":187.23,"endTime":189.15,"body":"we're gonna go through these"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":189.15,"endTime":191.4,"body":"examples. And then we're going"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":189.15,"endTime":191.4,"body":"to tell you all what we have"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":191.4,"endTime":194.58,"body":"dealt with in our own personal"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":191.4,"endTime":194.58,"body":"lives. With these examples,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":194.61,"endTime":197.1,"body":"chances are, if we've"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":194.61,"endTime":197.1,"body":"dealt with it, you've probably"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":197.1,"endTime":199.53,"body":"dealt with it to some degree as"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":197.1,"endTime":199.53,"body":"well. They're not special"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":199.92,"endTime":203.1,"body":"people. And yelling or shouting"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":199.92,"endTime":203.1,"body":"has always been a big one for"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":203.1,"endTime":205.98,"body":"me. So in my in my home growing"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":203.1,"endTime":205.98,"body":"up, there was a lot of yelling"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":205.98,"endTime":208.95,"body":"and shouting. And that's how"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":205.98,"endTime":208.95,"body":"communication was done. It was"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":208.95,"endTime":212.73,"body":"usually done at decibels that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":208.95,"endTime":212.73,"body":"would just pierce your ears. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":212.73,"endTime":218.4,"body":"to this day, this is like this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":212.73,"endTime":218.4,"body":"makes me just shrivel and cringe"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":218.43,"endTime":222.15,"body":"when people get loud. Especially"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":218.43,"endTime":222.15,"body":"in like disagreements, like we"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":222.15,"endTime":224.73,"body":"don't have to yell to talk. We"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":222.15,"endTime":224.73,"body":"don't have to yell to disagree."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":224.73,"endTime":227.82,"body":"We don't have to yell to get our"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":224.73,"endTime":227.82,"body":"points across. I think that once"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":227.82,"endTime":230.97,"body":"you've done that you've kind of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":227.82,"endTime":230.97,"body":"lost like, like you once your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":230.97,"endTime":233.79,"body":"vocabulary is spent and you have"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":230.97,"endTime":233.79,"body":"nothing else you just start"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":233.79,"endTime":237.81,"body":"yelling. It's just to me, it is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":233.79,"endTime":237.81,"body":"a sign that you do not know how"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":237.81,"endTime":238.62,"body":"to communicate."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":238.68,"endTime":243.3,"body":"Yeah, you've lost all"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":238.68,"endTime":243.3,"body":"control. So I was a yeller. And"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":243.3,"endTime":246.93,"body":"Matt used to tell me all the"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":243.3,"endTime":246.93,"body":"time that he would divorce me if"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":246.93,"endTime":247.29,"body":"I kept"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":247.32,"endTime":249.36,"body":"yelling, figure out how to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":247.32,"endTime":249.36,"body":"fix this man."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":249.45,"endTime":251.52,"body":"You know that right? You"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":249.45,"endTime":251.52,"body":"remember? Yeah, I remember"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":251.52,"endTime":253.68,"body":"saying like, Dude, I was asked"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":251.52,"endTime":253.68,"body":"that all the time. Like, don't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":253.68,"endTime":257.04,"body":"keep up hated the yelling. And I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":253.68,"endTime":257.04,"body":"have to say it has been a"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":257.04,"endTime":262.23,"body":"challenge to not yell and I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":257.04,"endTime":262.23,"body":"think I've done a pretty damn"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":262.23,"endTime":266.13,"body":"good job at it. You have I've"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":262.23,"endTime":266.13,"body":"done a credible job. I've gotten"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":266.13,"endTime":269.73,"body":"better so much, but like, there"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":266.13,"endTime":269.73,"body":"are times of course that I will"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":269.76,"endTime":272.64,"body":"I will raise my voice because I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":269.76,"endTime":272.64,"body":"am kind of loud. And it does."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":274.47,"endTime":280.2,"body":"It's, you know, but I used to do"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":274.47,"endTime":280.2,"body":"it. So out of out of habit, like"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":280.2,"endTime":283.38,"body":"it was just how I communicated"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":280.2,"endTime":283.38,"body":"and it is not a good habit to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":283.38,"endTime":286.98,"body":"have. Yeah, thank you. Thank you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":283.38,"endTime":286.98,"body":"for your work on this one"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":286.98,"endTime":289.71,"body":"because it's made things much"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":286.98,"endTime":289.71,"body":"more pleasant around here. And"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":289.71,"endTime":292.92,"body":"for our children. They're also"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":289.71,"endTime":292.92,"body":"growing up in a home where"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":292.92,"endTime":295.65,"body":"yelling isn't the preferred mode"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":292.92,"endTime":295.65,"body":"of communication, which I think"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":295.65,"endTime":299.97,"body":"is important for them and their"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":295.65,"endTime":299.97,"body":"children one day as well. Yes."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":300.0,"endTime":302.04,"body":"and breaking generational"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":300.0,"endTime":302.04,"body":"curses here?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":302.19,"endTime":304.44,"body":"Absolutely. So we put"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":302.19,"endTime":304.44,"body":"boundaries in place for that,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":304.47,"endTime":306.99,"body":"like, that's something that we"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":304.47,"endTime":306.99,"body":"can show you as an example."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":307.02,"endTime":309.15,"body":"Yep, is yelling, that's an"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":307.02,"endTime":309.15,"body":"example of something that may"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":309.15,"endTime":310.38,"body":"make you feel uncomfortable."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":309.15,"endTime":310.38,"body":"Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":310.44,"endTime":312.66,"body":"the next one is going to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":310.44,"endTime":312.66,"body":"be interrupting or talking over"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":312.66,"endTime":316.2,"body":"others. Mm hmm. I'm going to let"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":312.66,"endTime":316.2,"body":"you talk on that one."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":317.34,"endTime":322.53,"body":"So, once again, I've had"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":317.34,"endTime":322.53,"body":"someone in my life that was"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":322.53,"endTime":326.37,"body":"really bad about this, where you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":322.53,"endTime":326.37,"body":"could be in a conversation with"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":326.37,"endTime":331.05,"body":"them, and they just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":326.37,"endTime":331.05,"body":"conversations. So I use the word"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":331.05,"endTime":333.39,"body":"conversation carefully. Because"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":331.05,"endTime":333.39,"body":"that's what things are supposed"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":333.39,"endTime":335.28,"body":"to be even when you disagree"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":333.39,"endTime":335.28,"body":"with someone you have a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":335.28,"endTime":337.86,"body":"conversation about it. But what"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":335.28,"endTime":337.86,"body":"typically how these things"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":337.86,"endTime":343.08,"body":"rolled was this person would"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":337.86,"endTime":343.08,"body":"just talk at me. And you know,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":343.08,"endTime":345.42,"body":"I've got a perspective here,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":343.08,"endTime":345.42,"body":"I've got feelings, I've got"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":345.42,"endTime":347.61,"body":"things I need to express. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":345.42,"endTime":347.61,"body":"when you're not allowed to do"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":347.61,"endTime":350.64,"body":"that, it's extremely"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":347.61,"endTime":350.64,"body":"frustrating. And so with, I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":350.64,"endTime":352.92,"body":"don't want to get too far ahead"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":350.64,"endTime":352.92,"body":"of ourselves into into the next"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":352.92,"endTime":355.56,"body":"episode. But I did set a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":352.92,"endTime":355.56,"body":"boundary here, a lot of the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":355.56,"endTime":357.51,"body":"communication was over the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":355.56,"endTime":357.51,"body":"phone, but some of it was in"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":357.51,"endTime":361.62,"body":"person. And when things got too"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":357.51,"endTime":361.62,"body":"heated, I would just calmly say,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":362.22,"endTime":364.59,"body":"if you're not going to let me"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":362.22,"endTime":364.59,"body":"talk with you, then I'm hanging"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":364.59,"endTime":367.56,"body":"up the phone. And then I guess"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":364.59,"endTime":367.56,"body":"they would just, you know, call"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":367.56,"endTime":371.07,"body":"my bluff. And they would keep"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":367.56,"endTime":371.07,"body":"talking, and yelling and being"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":371.07,"endTime":373.53,"body":"rude and saying ugly things and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":371.07,"endTime":373.53,"body":"I would just hang the phone up,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":373.56,"endTime":375.93,"body":"calmly Hang the phone up. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":373.56,"endTime":375.93,"body":"then I would block the number."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":376.35,"endTime":378.75,"body":"And I would might leave it that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":376.35,"endTime":378.75,"body":"way for a week, two weeks. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":378.75,"endTime":381.12,"body":"like, I'm just I'm not dealing"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":378.75,"endTime":381.12,"body":"with this, you are not going to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":381.12,"endTime":384.93,"body":"treat me this way. It's not"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":381.12,"endTime":384.93,"body":"okay. I don't care. And it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":384.99,"endTime":387.03,"body":"this is where I'm at with it."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":384.99,"endTime":387.03,"body":"And if I'm in the room with this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":387.03,"endTime":390.36,"body":"person, I'd calmly walk out and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":387.03,"endTime":390.36,"body":"I would just leave. And that's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":390.36,"endTime":393.96,"body":"my way of telling you, this is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":390.36,"endTime":393.96,"body":"not how you are ever going to be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":393.96,"endTime":396.06,"body":"able to communicate with me. If"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":393.96,"endTime":396.06,"body":"we're going to have a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":396.06,"endTime":398.1,"body":"relationship, we're going to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":396.06,"endTime":398.1,"body":"talk like civilized people."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":398.13,"endTime":400.86,"body":"Right? Yes, great"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":398.13,"endTime":400.86,"body":"boundary. That was a great"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":400.86,"endTime":404.01,"body":"example. Thank you for sharing"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":400.86,"endTime":404.01,"body":"that. Yeah. There's a lot."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":404.04,"endTime":406.23,"body":"That's not me. I don't I don't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":404.04,"endTime":406.23,"body":"really interrupt people."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":406.26,"endTime":408.45,"body":"No, you're the best"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":406.26,"endTime":408.45,"body":"listener. I know."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":409.17,"endTime":410.91,"body":"Because I know how it"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":409.17,"endTime":410.91,"body":"feels. Now with children,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":410.91,"endTime":413.43,"body":"though. It's another thing that"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":410.91,"endTime":413.43,"body":"you can help with setting"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":413.43,"endTime":415.5,"body":"boundaries, because kids are"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":413.43,"endTime":415.5,"body":"always going to interrupt us."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":415.5,"endTime":417.93,"body":"It's just kind of how we're"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":415.5,"endTime":417.93,"body":"wired. They don't know any"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":417.93,"endTime":421.05,"body":"better. So you can practice with"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":417.93,"endTime":421.05,"body":"your kids. If they're"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":421.05,"endTime":425.37,"body":"interrupting you and be like and"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":421.05,"endTime":425.37,"body":"say, you know, we don't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":425.37,"endTime":428.07,"body":"interrupt people. If you keep"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":425.37,"endTime":428.07,"body":"doing it,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":428.1,"endTime":430.14,"body":"I don't recommend blocking"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":428.1,"endTime":430.14,"body":"your kid for two weeks."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":430.14,"endTime":433.92,"body":"But no, I'm not saying to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":430.14,"endTime":433.92,"body":"go that Johnny's like, but I'm"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":433.92,"endTime":437.1,"body":"hungry not talking about to that"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":433.92,"endTime":437.1,"body":"extent, because that's different"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":437.1,"endTime":440.76,"body":"children don't know any better"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":437.1,"endTime":440.76,"body":"grown adults should know better."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":441.36,"endTime":443.1,"body":"They should and if they"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":441.36,"endTime":443.1,"body":"don't, you're gonna teach you."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":443.13,"endTime":443.58,"body":"Right,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":443.58,"endTime":445.86,"body":"exactly. All right, so"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":443.58,"endTime":445.86,"body":"the next one is going to be"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":445.86,"endTime":450.36,"body":"invading personal space. I don't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":445.86,"endTime":450.36,"body":"like my personal space to be"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":450.36,"endTime":453.87,"body":"invaded. I think it's kind of an"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":450.36,"endTime":453.87,"body":"HSP thing for me."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":453.99,"endTime":456.51,"body":"I think it's a mom thing"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":453.99,"endTime":456.51,"body":"to grow up with these little"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":456.54,"endTime":457.83,"body":"Nikes crawling all over you."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":457.86,"endTime":460.14,"body":"Yes. I was gonna say you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":457.86,"endTime":460.14,"body":"just interrupted me. That was"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":460.14,"endTime":461.64,"body":"rude. I'm sorry. I did it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":461.64,"endTime":465.15,"body":"again. Please don't walk"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":461.64,"endTime":465.15,"body":"out of the podcast. We've got to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":465.15,"endTime":466.17,"body":"get this out to the people."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":467.46,"endTime":469.92,"body":"Okay, well, anyway, what"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":467.46,"endTime":469.92,"body":"I was gonna say I was gonna say"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":469.92,"endTime":470.64,"body":"the same thing."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":473.46,"endTime":476.85,"body":"I'm sorry. Off mic. I'm"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":473.46,"endTime":476.85,"body":"over here. laughing I'm sorry. I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":476.85,"endTime":480.57,"body":"didn't mean to interrupt you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":476.85,"endTime":480.57,"body":"again. Go ahead and proceed. Do"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":480.57,"endTime":482.49,"body":"you think you interrupted"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":480.57,"endTime":482.49,"body":"me? Or did you feel like it was"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":482.49,"endTime":484.14,"body":"appropriate for you to speak at"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":482.49,"endTime":484.14,"body":"that time?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":484.77,"endTime":486.96,"body":"I thought it would just be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":484.77,"endTime":486.96,"body":"funny if I said something at"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":486.96,"endTime":487.59,"body":"that moment."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":487.98,"endTime":490.86,"body":"Okay, well, you kind of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":487.98,"endTime":490.86,"body":"put words in my mouth because I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":490.86,"endTime":493.59,"body":"was gonna say, I think it's a"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":490.86,"endTime":493.59,"body":"mom thing. Because the first"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":493.59,"endTime":495.27,"body":"like five years of your"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":493.59,"endTime":495.27,"body":"children's life, they're"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":495.27,"endTime":498.39,"body":"constantly on you. And they're"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":495.27,"endTime":498.39,"body":"all in your space and in your"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":498.39,"endTime":501.63,"body":"area. And it's okay, it's okay."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":498.39,"endTime":501.63,"body":"I understand that. But now as"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":501.63,"endTime":505.59,"body":"they're older, I'm like, I need"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":501.63,"endTime":505.59,"body":"space because I don't like to be"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":506.43,"endTime":507.18,"body":"touched."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":508.2,"endTime":510.78,"body":"And I know when you don't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":508.2,"endTime":510.78,"body":"want to be messed with to you do"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":510.78,"endTime":513.96,"body":"know. Yeah, you've got my body."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":510.78,"endTime":513.96,"body":"You got an energy so loud, like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":513.96,"endTime":516.87,"body":"I can hear it. And I'm like, I'm"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":513.96,"endTime":516.87,"body":"not messing with her right now."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":516.87,"endTime":521.1,"body":"Man, I can't pay I came home on"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":516.87,"endTime":521.1,"body":"Friday. And you you were in your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":521.1,"endTime":522.87,"body":"in that mode. And you're just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":521.1,"endTime":522.87,"body":"like, I just don't want to be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":522.87,"endTime":525.75,"body":"messed with. Don't touch me"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":522.87,"endTime":525.75,"body":"don't even come within six feet"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":525.75,"endTime":528.39,"body":"of me like you put a circle"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":525.75,"endTime":528.39,"body":"around you. Like one of those"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":528.39,"endTime":531.15,"body":"spirits circles of assault."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":528.39,"endTime":531.15,"body":"Yeah, don't come near me."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":531.18,"endTime":535.44,"body":"Yeah. So do you think"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":531.18,"endTime":535.44,"body":"that this would also apply for"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":535.44,"endTime":539.88,"body":"people who are like reading your"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":535.44,"endTime":539.88,"body":"notes or your journals or"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":540.03,"endTime":543.45,"body":"reading things that are personal"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":540.03,"endTime":543.45,"body":"to you? Would that be invading"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":543.45,"endTime":544.35,"body":"personal space? Without"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":544.35,"endTime":547.02,"body":"a doubt? I don't think"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":544.35,"endTime":547.02,"body":"it's just your personal like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":547.02,"endTime":550.29,"body":"your, like your immediate space"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":547.02,"endTime":550.29,"body":"around your person. I think it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":550.29,"endTime":554.79,"body":"your things as well. Yeah. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":550.29,"endTime":554.79,"body":"Reading someone's journal, like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":554.79,"endTime":557.79,"body":"we can get into that. That's a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":554.79,"endTime":557.79,"body":"whole nother level of breaking"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":557.79,"endTime":561.51,"body":"trust and crossing boundaries."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":557.79,"endTime":561.51,"body":"But yeah, I think that it also"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":561.54,"endTime":564.75,"body":"has to do with your things and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":561.54,"endTime":564.75,"body":"the things that you hold dear"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":564.75,"endTime":568.29,"body":"and things that like are sort of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":564.75,"endTime":568.29,"body":"extensions of you. Yep. So yeah,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":568.29,"endTime":570.36,"body":"I think that that's more than"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":568.29,"endTime":570.36,"body":"fair. And I think that you could"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":570.36,"endTime":572.7,"body":"also look at this, like if you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":570.36,"endTime":572.7,"body":"work with someone who's a close"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":572.7,"endTime":576.15,"body":"talker. We all know close"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":572.7,"endTime":576.15,"body":"talkers. You don't talk about"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":576.15,"endTime":576.69,"body":"humor worked with"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":576.96,"endTime":579.75,"body":"my gosh, yes, it did. The"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":576.96,"endTime":579.75,"body":"person just popped into my head"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":579.75,"endTime":583.95,"body":"from back in the day, man. With"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":579.75,"endTime":583.95,"body":"that I get out of my space that"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":583.95,"endTime":585.24,"body":"is not appropriate."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":585.9,"endTime":588.69,"body":"I knew one of these guys"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":585.9,"endTime":588.69,"body":"and I did this. This is a work"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":588.69,"endTime":593.88,"body":"thing. And he would get so close"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":588.69,"endTime":593.88,"body":"to me. And like he was also one"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":593.88,"endTime":595.95,"body":"of those guys when he'd be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":593.88,"endTime":595.95,"body":"telling a story he would like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":595.98,"endTime":599.64,"body":"aggressively like, smack you on"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":595.98,"endTime":599.64,"body":"the back or like touch your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":599.64,"endTime":602.82,"body":"shoulder. During like, pull you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":599.64,"endTime":602.82,"body":"down and it's like I remember"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":602.82,"endTime":605.1,"body":"just telling him just putting my"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":602.82,"endTime":605.1,"body":"arm and my hand on the shoulder"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":605.1,"endTime":608.76,"body":"was like, give me some space in"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":605.1,"endTime":608.76,"body":"like dead serious just said it."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":608.79,"endTime":612.24,"body":"Really I stopped doing it, but"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":608.79,"endTime":612.24,"body":"that's awesome. I think it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":612.24,"endTime":614.82,"body":"killed him to not do it because"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":612.24,"endTime":614.82,"body":"it's just how he was, but it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":614.82,"endTime":616.05,"body":"made me uncomfortable. I didn't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":614.82,"endTime":616.05,"body":"like it."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":616.08,"endTime":618.93,"body":"Well, good for you for"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":616.08,"endTime":618.93,"body":"speaking up. A lot of people"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":618.93,"endTime":621.6,"body":"wouldn't do that. Yeah. Can you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":618.93,"endTime":621.6,"body":"think of anything else?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":621.63,"endTime":623.58,"body":"No close talkers. That was"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":621.63,"endTime":623.58,"body":"the last one."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":623.61,"endTime":626.37,"body":"Okay. The next one is"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":623.61,"endTime":626.37,"body":"going to be excessive criticism"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":626.37,"endTime":627.09,"body":"or nitpicking."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":628.17,"endTime":630.45,"body":"What do you got to say"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":628.17,"endTime":630.45,"body":"here page essay for yourself?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":630.479,"endTime":637.919,"body":"Yeah, that that was me. I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":630.479,"endTime":637.919,"body":"was very excessive criticizing."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":639.149,"endTime":643.889,"body":"I kind of that was part of my"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":639.149,"endTime":643.889,"body":"upbringing in some aspects. So"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":643.889,"endTime":647.369,"body":"it was kind of inbred in me to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":643.889,"endTime":647.369,"body":"where we would like I would"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":647.369,"endTime":650.549,"body":"criticize you I would want you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":647.369,"endTime":650.549,"body":"to be a certain way I would"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":650.549,"endTime":654.959,"body":"actually point out your flaws or"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":650.549,"endTime":654.959,"body":"your mistakes and it's like,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":654.959,"endTime":656.159,"body":"Damn, that's wrong."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":656.19,"endTime":658.59,"body":"I swear that sometimes"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":656.19,"endTime":658.59,"body":"like walking in your house as a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":658.59,"endTime":661.32,"body":"teenager, it's like it was a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":658.59,"endTime":661.32,"body":"frat house. And the moment you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":661.32,"endTime":665.13,"body":"walk in everyone is just like,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":661.32,"endTime":665.13,"body":"dissing you and doggone you and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":665.13,"endTime":669.09,"body":"messing with you and it's like,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":665.13,"endTime":669.09,"body":"an insecure 15 year old kid like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":669.84,"endTime":672.45,"body":"and I just left the barbershop"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":669.84,"endTime":672.45,"body":"I'll never forget it man. I left"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":672.45,"endTime":674.88,"body":"the barbershop and I came over"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":672.45,"endTime":674.88,"body":"and I knew that my haircut"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":674.88,"endTime":678.45,"body":"didn't look that great but I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":674.88,"endTime":678.45,"body":"walked in and pages like you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":678.45,"endTime":682.17,"body":"look like Hilary Swank from Boys"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":678.45,"endTime":682.17,"body":"Don't Cry. Which is a hilarious"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":682.17,"endTime":686.82,"body":"cut down but it killed me man."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":682.17,"endTime":686.82,"body":"Worst haircut I've ever had. I'm"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":686.82,"endTime":690.45,"body":"sorry. Worst haircut I've ever"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":686.82,"endTime":690.45,"body":"had. It was a hair sensations in"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":690.45,"endTime":693.51,"body":"Rowlett, Texas. Don't go there."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":690.45,"endTime":693.51,"body":"That is true. I mean, hurt"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":693.51,"endTime":694.29,"body":"anyone's business. But"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":694.29,"endTime":697.35,"body":"I mean, it was it was all"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":694.29,"endTime":697.35,"body":"out of love though. Growing up."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":697.38,"endTime":700.83,"body":"The criticism was not meant the"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":697.38,"endTime":700.83,"body":"intentions were not meant to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":700.83,"endTime":703.26,"body":"hurt people. But that doesn't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":700.83,"endTime":703.26,"body":"mean anything. You know, it's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":703.26,"endTime":706.74,"body":"still as far as people"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":703.26,"endTime":706.74,"body":"criticizing people sucks like"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":706.77,"endTime":710.25,"body":"nitpick. What did I nitpick? Is"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":706.77,"endTime":710.25,"body":"there anything that I nitpicked?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":710.88,"endTime":713.61,"body":"You're not really"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":710.88,"endTime":713.61,"body":"nitpicky, it was just criticism."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":713.64,"endTime":716.22,"body":"Okay? It was really criticism."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":713.64,"endTime":716.22,"body":"It wasn't like the nitpicky"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":716.22,"endTime":716.52,"body":"stuff."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":716.55,"endTime":718.62,"body":"Yeah. And that's one"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":716.55,"endTime":718.62,"body":"thing I admire about you. You've"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":718.62,"endTime":723.36,"body":"never criticized in a way, you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":718.62,"endTime":723.36,"body":"know, that made me feel less"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":723.36,"endTime":723.69,"body":"than,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":723.96,"endTime":727.2,"body":"you know, nitpicking,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":723.96,"endTime":727.2,"body":"though, um, I do know someone in"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":727.2,"endTime":732.0,"body":"our lives that does this. And I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":727.2,"endTime":732.0,"body":"think that I'm looking, I'm"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":732.0,"endTime":734.85,"body":"thinking about, like, my circle"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":732.0,"endTime":734.85,"body":"of people, your circle of people"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":734.85,"endTime":739.05,"body":"and other people I know. And I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":734.85,"endTime":739.05,"body":"can identify about four or five"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":739.05,"endTime":741.09,"body":"of them. And I don't know why."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":739.05,"endTime":741.09,"body":"But these are usually like,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":741.9,"endTime":746.97,"body":"elderly women, like grandmothers"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":741.9,"endTime":746.97,"body":"or like, in laws. And it's like,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":746.97,"endTime":749.58,"body":"I don't know what it is about,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":746.97,"endTime":749.58,"body":"like the elderly mother figure"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":749.58,"endTime":753.72,"body":"but they're nitpicky, nitpicky"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":749.58,"endTime":753.72,"body":"and critical you know, it could"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":753.72,"endTime":756.3,"body":"be a generation that was telling"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":753.72,"endTime":756.3,"body":"you like you're slouching stand"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":756.3,"endTime":758.64,"body":"up straight, like stuff like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":756.3,"endTime":758.64,"body":"that, you know, never anything,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":758.64,"endTime":761.31,"body":"like super harmful, but I guess"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":758.64,"endTime":761.31,"body":"it can be nitpicky. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":761.43,"endTime":764.43,"body":"But it makes a lot of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":761.43,"endTime":764.43,"body":"people uncomfortable. Yeah. All"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":764.43,"endTime":768.33,"body":"right. This one's gonna be fun."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":764.43,"endTime":768.33,"body":"Ignoring or dismissing someone's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":768.33,"endTime":769.59,"body":"feelings or opinions."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":769.62,"endTime":770.76,"body":"Then on to the next one."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":774.93,"endTime":777.21,"body":"I love how we have"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":774.93,"endTime":777.21,"body":"experience and all of these."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":777.21,"endTime":778.83,"body":"It's kind of cracking me up."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":778.859,"endTime":780.329,"body":"This one's painful. But"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":778.859,"endTime":780.329,"body":"let's go through."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":780.359,"endTime":785.579,"body":"Okay. You want me to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":780.359,"endTime":785.579,"body":"start? Yeah. Well, okay. So Matt"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":785.579,"endTime":789.749,"body":"had a very this is definitely"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":785.579,"endTime":789.749,"body":"Matt dismissing me and my"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":789.749,"endTime":793.499,"body":"feelings and my opinions."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":789.749,"endTime":793.499,"body":"Obviously, we we've talked about"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":793.499,"endTime":796.229,"body":"how he's dismissed my opinions"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":793.499,"endTime":796.229,"body":"before and my values whenever he"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":796.229,"endTime":801.449,"body":"was using. But when it came to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":796.229,"endTime":801.449,"body":"my anxiety and going through"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":801.449,"endTime":805.169,"body":"panic attacks and being very"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":801.449,"endTime":805.169,"body":"uncomfortable, he dismissed me"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":805.229,"endTime":809.489,"body":"heavily. He wanted me to just"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":805.229,"endTime":809.489,"body":"change he thought I was crazy."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":809.699,"endTime":812.999,"body":"He was like, this is stupid, he"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":809.699,"endTime":812.999,"body":"would say really negative things"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":812.999,"endTime":818.069,"body":"towards me. And what do you got"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":812.999,"endTime":818.069,"body":"to say about it now?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":818.28,"endTime":820.35,"body":"Ignoring or dismissing"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":818.28,"endTime":820.35,"body":"someone's feelings or opinions?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":820.35,"endTime":824.22,"body":"Yeah, this one's like, it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":820.35,"endTime":824.22,"body":"rather serious for us. I think"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":824.22,"endTime":827.1,"body":"that there are points in your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":824.22,"endTime":827.1,"body":"relationship, especially when"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":827.1,"endTime":830.19,"body":"you're younger, you get together"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":827.1,"endTime":830.19,"body":"with somebody. And without, I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":830.19,"endTime":832.8,"body":"think intuitively, we all know"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":830.19,"endTime":832.8,"body":"that, like, you can't change"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":832.83,"endTime":836.28,"body":"other people. But I think"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":832.83,"endTime":836.28,"body":"there's another part of us that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":836.28,"endTime":838.26,"body":"sort of finds the gray area"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":836.28,"endTime":838.26,"body":"there. And they're like, Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":838.26,"endTime":839.91,"body":"but it doesn't mean you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":838.26,"endTime":839.91,"body":"shouldn't try to make people"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":839.91,"endTime":844.11,"body":"better, shouldn't try to improve"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":839.91,"endTime":844.11,"body":"people, you know, and I think"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":844.11,"endTime":847.68,"body":"that for the longest time, I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":844.11,"endTime":847.68,"body":"looked at your anxiety as"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":847.68,"endTime":851.04,"body":"something that I could help you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":847.68,"endTime":851.04,"body":"with. But what I was really"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":851.04,"endTime":854.1,"body":"doing every time that I was"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":851.04,"endTime":854.1,"body":"trying to quote unquote, help"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":854.1,"endTime":857.7,"body":"you is I was invalidating your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":854.1,"endTime":857.7,"body":"emotions, I was invalidating"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":857.7,"endTime":860.58,"body":"your state of mind. And I was"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":857.7,"endTime":860.58,"body":"invalidating your experience."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":860.97,"endTime":864.66,"body":"And that took me quite some time"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":860.97,"endTime":864.66,"body":"to figure out because I thought"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":864.66,"endTime":867.39,"body":"that it was something you could"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":864.66,"endTime":867.39,"body":"just fix with a couple of mind"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":867.39,"endTime":869.67,"body":"games, a couple of mind tricks,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":867.39,"endTime":869.67,"body":"like not that I was, like,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":869.67,"endTime":872.28,"body":"manipulative, but just like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":869.67,"endTime":872.28,"body":"showing you, like, you know,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":872.28,"endTime":874.71,"body":"everything's okay. It's calm,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":872.28,"endTime":874.71,"body":"it's fine. It's good. And that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":874.71,"endTime":877.14,"body":"is not how you support someone"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":874.71,"endTime":877.14,"body":"with anxieties by telling them"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":877.17,"endTime":880.8,"body":"it's not it's not real. It's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":877.17,"endTime":880.8,"body":"not, it doesn't exist, it's it,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":880.8,"endTime":883.44,"body":"you shouldn't have it. And this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":880.8,"endTime":883.44,"body":"took me quite some time to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":883.44,"endTime":885.51,"body":"figure it out. And like I'm"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":883.44,"endTime":885.51,"body":"ashamed to sit here and say"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":885.51,"endTime":888.0,"body":"this, but I'm just being honest"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":885.51,"endTime":888.0,"body":"and authentic is that I did"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":888.0,"endTime":891.45,"body":"these things at one point in our"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":888.0,"endTime":891.45,"body":"relationship. And it's, it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":891.45,"endTime":894.0,"body":"been something that we've really"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":891.45,"endTime":894.0,"body":"had to work through on a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":894.0,"endTime":897.03,"body":"personal level as well because"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":894.0,"endTime":897.03,"body":"there's wreckage from that."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":897.06,"endTime":900.54,"body":"There's a lot of there's a lot"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":897.06,"endTime":900.54,"body":"of parts of you Do I think that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":900.54,"endTime":903.06,"body":"he's still scared to be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":900.54,"endTime":903.06,"body":"vulnerable with with me when it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":903.06,"endTime":905.88,"body":"comes to anxiety? Absolutely."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":903.06,"endTime":905.88,"body":"And it's trust that I'll have to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":905.88,"endTime":909.48,"body":"earn back over maybe decades? I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":905.88,"endTime":909.48,"body":"don't know. But I'm ready for"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":909.48,"endTime":911.76,"body":"it. I'm ready to do it. And I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":909.48,"endTime":911.76,"body":"understand that what I did was"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":911.76,"endTime":914.7,"body":"wrong. And I'm just trying to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":911.76,"endTime":914.7,"body":"make right by it now. But yeah,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":914.7,"endTime":917.46,"body":"this was a really tough one. I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":914.7,"endTime":917.46,"body":"think it's a, when you look at"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":917.85,"endTime":919.71,"body":"when you look at all of these"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":917.85,"endTime":919.71,"body":"that we're going through, this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":919.71,"endTime":924.99,"body":"could be the most commonly"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":919.71,"endTime":924.99,"body":"shared of all of them is like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":924.99,"endTime":928.2,"body":"feeling unsafe, and your own"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":924.99,"endTime":928.2,"body":"emotions in your relationship."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":928.44,"endTime":930.6,"body":"When somebody ignores or"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":928.44,"endTime":930.6,"body":"dismisses your feelings or your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":930.6,"endTime":933.66,"body":"opinions. They're essentially"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":930.6,"endTime":933.66,"body":"saying that the way you feel is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":933.66,"endTime":938.58,"body":"wrong. The way you are is wrong,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":933.66,"endTime":938.58,"body":"you ought to be this other way."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":938.58,"endTime":941.37,"body":"And it doesn't leave them"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":938.58,"endTime":941.37,"body":"feeling motivated. It leaves"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":941.37,"endTime":944.55,"body":"them feeling ashamed. And it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":941.37,"endTime":944.55,"body":"makes them feel like they don't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":944.55,"endTime":947.64,"body":"matter. And where are they?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":944.55,"endTime":947.64,"body":"Right? Yeah. Did I cover that?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":947.64,"endTime":949.11,"body":"Like, did what did I know you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":947.64,"endTime":949.11,"body":"did great."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":949.89,"endTime":951.93,"body":"The only thing that I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":949.89,"endTime":951.93,"body":"wanted to touch on with that is"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":951.93,"endTime":956.97,"body":"the way that you became aware of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":951.93,"endTime":956.97,"body":"this, what you were doing is"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":956.97,"endTime":960.0,"body":"that we saw, you know, we went"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":956.97,"endTime":960.0,"body":"to therapy, we went to couples"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":960.0,"endTime":962.91,"body":"therapy together, therapy is"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":960.0,"endTime":962.91,"body":"great. And it really did open"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":962.91,"endTime":967.38,"body":"his eyes to a way of handling it"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":962.91,"endTime":967.38,"body":"better. And I thought that was"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":967.38,"endTime":970.26,"body":"awesome. And I'm really"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":967.38,"endTime":970.26,"body":"grateful. Because every time"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":970.26,"endTime":973.68,"body":"that something like comes up,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":970.26,"endTime":973.68,"body":"and I do get vulnerable with you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":973.68,"endTime":976.98,"body":"and my emotions and how I'm"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":973.68,"endTime":976.98,"body":"feeling you are so much better"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":976.98,"endTime":980.04,"body":"than you used to be. And that's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":976.98,"endTime":980.04,"body":"building the trust back slowly"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":980.04,"endTime":983.01,"body":"and surely. But it's like every"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":980.04,"endTime":983.01,"body":"single time it's built up just a"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":983.01,"endTime":983.79,"body":"little bit more."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":983.85,"endTime":985.77,"body":"Yeah. And without therapy."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":983.85,"endTime":985.77,"body":"We probably never would have"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":985.77,"endTime":987.84,"body":"seen that. Do we had to have an"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":985.77,"endTime":987.84,"body":"inside voice?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":987.87,"endTime":989.97,"body":"No, because yeah, you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":987.87,"endTime":989.97,"body":"couldn't I couldn't tell you you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":989.97,"endTime":993.39,"body":"weren't gonna listen to me. You"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":989.97,"endTime":993.39,"body":"just like when you were an"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":993.39,"endTime":996.39,"body":"addict. You weren't gonna listen"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":993.39,"endTime":996.39,"body":"to me then or I'm not gonna"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":996.39,"endTime":999.63,"body":"listen to you during the"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":996.39,"endTime":999.63,"body":"anxiety. So that's, we had to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":999.63,"endTime":1001.1,"body":"get help. 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Okay, and"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1100.43,"endTime":1103.13,"body":"what's your next one is"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1100.43,"endTime":1103.13,"body":"engaging in gossip or spreading"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1103.13,"endTime":1107.84,"body":"rumors? This is a this is a"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1103.13,"endTime":1107.84,"body":"behavior that makes me extremely"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1107.84,"endTime":1111.23,"body":"uncomfortable. 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And like you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1145.94,"endTime":1149.24,"body":"essentially, in the kindest way"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1149.24,"endTime":1153.5,"body":"possible you shut down the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1149.24,"endTime":1153.5,"body":"gossipers by creating empathy"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1153.53,"endTime":1155.99,"body":"and letting people know that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1153.53,"endTime":1155.99,"body":"there's more to people than what"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1155.99,"endTime":1158.69,"body":"you're talking about right at"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1155.99,"endTime":1158.69,"body":"this moment. And I always"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1158.69,"endTime":1160.58,"body":"thought that was like the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1158.69,"endTime":1160.58,"body":"coolest thing that you did,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1160.61,"endTime":1162.92,"body":"because you will stand up when"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1160.61,"endTime":1162.92,"body":"everyone else is doing the wrong"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1162.92,"endTime":1165.14,"body":"thing and do the right thing."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1162.92,"endTime":1165.14,"body":"And in that moment, you don't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1165.14,"endTime":1168.14,"body":"really care. Yeah, like, think"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1165.14,"endTime":1168.14,"body":"less of me. I don't really care."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1168.14,"endTime":1168.95,"body":"I don't like you either."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1168.98,"endTime":1172.46,"body":"Yeah. And I feel guilty"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1168.98,"endTime":1172.46,"body":"when I gossip with people. I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1172.46,"endTime":1175.04,"body":"mean, of course there's times"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1172.46,"endTime":1175.04,"body":"where we will probably say"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1175.04,"endTime":1177.35,"body":"something or have an opinion to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1175.04,"endTime":1177.35,"body":"them. Like oh, man, I don't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1177.35,"endTime":1181.16,"body":"really feel that way. That's not"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1177.35,"endTime":1181.16,"body":"not nice. But then I wonder you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1181.16,"endTime":1185.33,"body":"know why? This is probably why I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1181.16,"endTime":1185.33,"body":"don't have a lot of girlfriends."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1185.42,"endTime":1188.48,"body":"This is one thing because I feel"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1185.42,"endTime":1188.48,"body":"like some relationships are"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1188.48,"endTime":1193.34,"body":"based on Gossip. That's that's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1188.48,"endTime":1193.34,"body":"what they're all based on. And I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1193.34,"endTime":1196.76,"body":"just don't I don't tolerate"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1193.34,"endTime":1196.76,"body":"that. It does not go with my"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1197.3,"endTime":1199.97,"body":"values. Yeah, for sure."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1201.56,"endTime":1203.99,"body":"What's next making"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1201.56,"endTime":1203.99,"body":"derogatory or offensive"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1203.99,"endTime":1204.83,"body":"comments?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1205.49,"endTime":1211.04,"body":"Yeah, this one's pretty"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1205.49,"endTime":1211.04,"body":"self explanatory. But think"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1211.04,"endTime":1213.98,"body":"about people that you're around."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1211.04,"endTime":1213.98,"body":"Maybe you've got extended"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1213.98,"endTime":1218.36,"body":"family. Maybe you feel different"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1213.98,"endTime":1218.36,"body":"ways politically or about things"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1218.36,"endTime":1221.36,"body":"that are going on in society."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1218.36,"endTime":1221.36,"body":"There's some people that use"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1221.36,"endTime":1225.02,"body":"language that is uncalled for,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1221.36,"endTime":1225.02,"body":"makes you feel uncomfortable"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1225.02,"endTime":1227.54,"body":"makes you feel like this is just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1225.02,"endTime":1227.54,"body":"not a place I want to be right"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1227.54,"endTime":1231.23,"body":"now. This feels Oh, it's gross."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1227.54,"endTime":1231.23,"body":"I don't like the conversation. I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1231.23,"endTime":1233.66,"body":"don't like what they're talking"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1231.23,"endTime":1233.66,"body":"about. People that make"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1233.66,"endTime":1237.29,"body":"discriminatory remarks, or, I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1233.66,"endTime":1237.29,"body":"mean, sometimes for some people,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1237.29,"endTime":1239.45,"body":"it's even offensive humor. Like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1237.29,"endTime":1239.45,"body":"sometimes humor just goes too"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1239.45,"endTime":1241.46,"body":"far. Maybe that joke was not"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1239.45,"endTime":1241.46,"body":"funny to do. And these people"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1241.46,"endTime":1245.45,"body":"constantly crossed the line with"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1241.46,"endTime":1245.45,"body":"that. It creates discomfort, and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1245.48,"endTime":1248.78,"body":"I mean, it'll stress you out."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1245.48,"endTime":1248.78,"body":"Yeah. That was pretty self"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1248.78,"endTime":1249.47,"body":"explanatory, though."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1249.5,"endTime":1252.53,"body":"Right? I think we've all"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1249.5,"endTime":1252.53,"body":"we've all dealt with this. I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1252.53,"endTime":1255.68,"body":"mean, we've even in our"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1252.53,"endTime":1255.68,"body":"marriage, we weren't always kind"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1255.68,"endTime":1258.89,"body":"to each other. No, we've said"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1255.68,"endTime":1258.89,"body":"some hateful things to each"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1258.89,"endTime":1261.8,"body":"other. I don't remember mine"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1258.89,"endTime":1261.8,"body":"called me Hillary"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1261.8,"endTime":1263.6,"body":"swing from Boys Don't Cry,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1261.8,"endTime":1263.6,"body":"and I won't forget it anytime"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1263.6,"endTime":1263.87,"body":"soon."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1268.01,"endTime":1268.85,"body":"Never live that down."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1269.51,"endTime":1273.38,"body":"It was funny. It was solid"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1269.51,"endTime":1273.38,"body":"burn. It was great."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1273.83,"endTime":1276.2,"body":"All right. The next one"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1273.83,"endTime":1276.2,"body":"is excessive questioning or"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1276.2,"endTime":1280.25,"body":"prying. You had notes on this"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1276.2,"endTime":1280.25,"body":"one? Um, well, it's just really"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1280.25,"endTime":1284.03,"body":"if somebody is upset about"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1280.25,"endTime":1284.03,"body":"something, and you go to them"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1284.03,"endTime":1286.25,"body":"and say, Hey, is everything"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1284.03,"endTime":1286.25,"body":"okay? And they're like,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1286.37,"endTime":1290.15,"body":"everything's fine. You know, ask"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1286.37,"endTime":1290.15,"body":"a question again. Are you sure?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1290.42,"endTime":1292.88,"body":"Like, no, it's all right. Or do"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1290.42,"endTime":1292.88,"body":"you want to talk about it? And"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1292.88,"endTime":1298.67,"body":"they say no respect that respect"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1292.88,"endTime":1298.67,"body":"that? You know, we don't have to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1298.67,"endTime":1302.6,"body":"question them constantly and try"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1298.67,"endTime":1302.6,"body":"to like pull information out of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1302.6,"endTime":1305.51,"body":"them. Because they may not feel"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1302.6,"endTime":1305.51,"body":"comfortable talking about it"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1305.51,"endTime":1308.87,"body":"right now. In that moment. Matt"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1305.51,"endTime":1308.87,"body":"will say otherwise, because"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1308.87,"endTime":1310.61,"body":"women do play games."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1310.79,"endTime":1312.92,"body":"So the ad this can"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1310.79,"endTime":1312.92,"body":"backfire. And I'm just speaking"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1312.92,"endTime":1315.65,"body":"from a male's perspective and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1312.92,"endTime":1315.65,"body":"things that me and my friends"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1315.65,"endTime":1319.82,"body":"have talked about. You can like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1315.65,"endTime":1319.82,"body":"walk in and you can tell that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1319.82,"endTime":1322.85,"body":"your partner's a little upset"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1319.82,"endTime":1322.85,"body":"about something you're like, do"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1322.85,"endTime":1327.05,"body":"I take the bait? Sure. Okay."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1322.85,"endTime":1327.05,"body":"Hey, what's wrong? Nothing."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1328.16,"endTime":1331.73,"body":"Seems like Something's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1328.16,"endTime":1331.73,"body":"definitely wrong. Nothing. Okay,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1331.73,"endTime":1335.63,"body":"well, do you want to talk about"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1331.73,"endTime":1335.63,"body":"it? No. All right, well, I'm,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1336.17,"endTime":1338.15,"body":"I'm here, if you want to talk"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1336.17,"endTime":1338.15,"body":"about it, and then you disappear"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1338.15,"endTime":1341.42,"body":"the next room and then when the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1338.15,"endTime":1341.42,"body":"fight inevitably does happen,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1341.42,"endTime":1344.81,"body":"you get chastised and criticized"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1341.42,"endTime":1344.81,"body":"for not asking what was wrong?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1344.81,"endTime":1346.37,"body":"Well, that's their problem, not"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1344.81,"endTime":1346.37,"body":"getting it"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1346.37,"endTime":1349.4,"body":"out. That's childish."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1346.37,"endTime":1349.4,"body":"That is not appropriate"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1349.4,"endTime":1352.28,"body":"communication skills. I'm just"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1349.4,"endTime":1352.28,"body":"gonna throw it out there because"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1352.28,"endTime":1354.98,"body":"I did it too. I used to do that."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1352.28,"endTime":1354.98,"body":"I'm not gonna lie, because I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1354.98,"endTime":1357.41,"body":"didn't know what to talk about"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1354.98,"endTime":1357.41,"body":"it or I wanted you to fight for"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1357.41,"endTime":1360.56,"body":"me or something. I don't know."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1357.41,"endTime":1360.56,"body":"But it's exhausting doing that."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1360.83,"endTime":1364.67,"body":"So freakin exhausting. Just be"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1360.83,"endTime":1364.67,"body":"open and honest, or just don't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1364.73,"endTime":1367.13,"body":"say anything at all. But that's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1364.73,"endTime":1367.13,"body":"the whole point of this is"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1367.13,"endTime":1370.22,"body":"don't, you don't have to pry."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1367.13,"endTime":1370.22,"body":"Some people don't like it. When"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1370.22,"endTime":1372.95,"body":"you pry and you get questioned"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1370.22,"endTime":1372.95,"body":"constantly."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1373.01,"endTime":1375.77,"body":"And I think about around"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1373.01,"endTime":1375.77,"body":"particular topics, this might be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1375.77,"endTime":1379.49,"body":"more more in line with like a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1375.77,"endTime":1379.49,"body":"boundary you would put up, let's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1379.49,"endTime":1381.92,"body":"say that you've got a difficult"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1379.49,"endTime":1381.92,"body":"relationship with somebody at"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1381.92,"endTime":1385.79,"body":"work or something. And you guys"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1381.92,"endTime":1385.79,"body":"have agreed not to talk about"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1385.82,"endTime":1388.55,"body":"this, this thing at work because"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1385.82,"endTime":1388.55,"body":"it causes problems in your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1388.55,"endTime":1391.46,"body":"marriage. A lot of people have"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1388.55,"endTime":1391.46,"body":"this, it's like their jobs"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1391.46,"endTime":1393.62,"body":"stresses them out like crazy."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1391.46,"endTime":1393.62,"body":"And they come home and they"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1393.62,"endTime":1396.08,"body":"bring it home. And then at some"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1393.62,"endTime":1396.08,"body":"point, as a couple you agree,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1396.08,"endTime":1398.87,"body":"like Let's just not talk about"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1396.08,"endTime":1398.87,"body":"things at work. But you can't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1398.87,"endTime":1402.62,"body":"help it. It bothered you. So"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1398.87,"endTime":1402.62,"body":"when you get home, your spouse"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1402.62,"endTime":1405.47,"body":"will ask well, what's wrong and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1402.62,"endTime":1405.47,"body":"you just say? Nothing. It's just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1405.68,"endTime":1409.4,"body":"just nothing. I think that in"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1405.68,"endTime":1409.4,"body":"that moment, since you've"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1409.4,"endTime":1412.49,"body":"communicated about it, you know,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1409.4,"endTime":1412.49,"body":"basically what it is. Let's just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1412.49,"endTime":1414.65,"body":"let them process it and get"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1412.49,"endTime":1414.65,"body":"through it without prying and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1414.65,"endTime":1417.14,"body":"causing a fight. Yep. Because"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1414.65,"endTime":1417.14,"body":"you end up right back to square"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1417.14,"endTime":1419.45,"body":"one. Yep, ultimately?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1417.14,"endTime":1419.45,"body":"Absolutely. I think that's a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1419.45,"endTime":1422.9,"body":"healthy boundary to put in place"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1419.45,"endTime":1422.9,"body":"for that behavior. Yep. All"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1422.9,"endTime":1429.02,"body":"right, the next one. So non"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1422.9,"endTime":1429.02,"body":"consensual physical contact. I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1429.02,"endTime":1434.6,"body":"think so. Let's get into this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1429.02,"endTime":1434.6,"body":"one. And probably the easier of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1434.6,"endTime":1437.12,"body":"the two realms. The first one is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1434.6,"endTime":1437.12,"body":"like in your professional life."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1438.86,"endTime":1441.35,"body":"I haven't dealt with this. Well,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1438.86,"endTime":1441.35,"body":"actually, I guess I have no I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1441.35,"endTime":1446.87,"body":"have dealt with this. I have"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1441.35,"endTime":1446.87,"body":"actually, I forgot about that."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1448.88,"endTime":1451.91,"body":"So this has happened to me. If"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1448.88,"endTime":1451.91,"body":"you're a woman, this is probably"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1451.91,"endTime":1456.98,"body":"happened to you at some point to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1451.91,"endTime":1456.98,"body":"when someone touches you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1456.98,"endTime":1460.1,"body":"physically and you do not"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1456.98,"endTime":1460.1,"body":"appreciate it. I do not"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1460.1,"endTime":1463.31,"body":"appreciate that that was made me"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1460.1,"endTime":1463.31,"body":"extremely uncomfortable."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1463.34,"endTime":1466.04,"body":"This was going beyond"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1463.34,"endTime":1466.04,"body":"invading personal space."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1471.98,"endTime":1474.05,"body":"Episode gets 10,000"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1471.98,"endTime":1474.05,"body":"downloads by next week. I'll"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1474.05,"endTime":1477.17,"body":"tell the story otherwise,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1474.05,"endTime":1477.17,"body":"keeping that to myself. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1477.29,"endTime":1483.17,"body":"yeah. So I know that women have"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1477.29,"endTime":1483.17,"body":"dealt with this much more than"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1483.17,"endTime":1485.66,"body":"men historically, in the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1483.17,"endTime":1485.66,"body":"workplace where someone has just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1485.66,"endTime":1488.51,"body":"made you uncomfortable violating"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1485.66,"endTime":1488.51,"body":"your personal space. Maybe it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1488.51,"endTime":1491.24,"body":"even just like brushing up"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1488.51,"endTime":1491.24,"body":"against your shoulder. Some"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1491.24,"endTime":1493.58,"body":"little things like that. These"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1491.24,"endTime":1493.58,"body":"are behaviors that make you feel"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1493.58,"endTime":1497.54,"body":"uncomfortable. Now, the other"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1493.58,"endTime":1497.54,"body":"part of this is within a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1497.54,"endTime":1499.37,"body":"marriage and I think it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1497.54,"endTime":1499.37,"body":"something that a lot of people"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1499.37,"endTime":1503.87,"body":"probably don't Don't consider"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1499.37,"endTime":1503.87,"body":"because it's marriage right. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1503.87,"endTime":1506.96,"body":"so I think that a lot of, I'm"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1503.87,"endTime":1506.96,"body":"gonna speak for men here, I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1506.96,"endTime":1510.44,"body":"think that a lot of men feel"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1506.96,"endTime":1510.44,"body":"that whenever you get married to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1510.44,"endTime":1514.7,"body":"someone, it gives you the right"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1510.44,"endTime":1514.7,"body":"to treat them like a domestic"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1514.7,"endTime":1517.43,"body":"prostitute, where it's like,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1514.7,"endTime":1517.43,"body":"this is someone that you can"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1517.43,"endTime":1520.88,"body":"just have your way with whenever"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1517.43,"endTime":1520.88,"body":"you want. And they forget the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1520.88,"endTime":1524.24,"body":"fact that this is a person who"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1520.88,"endTime":1524.24,"body":"has feelings and emotions and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1524.24,"endTime":1529.07,"body":"moods. And they have, you know,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1524.24,"endTime":1529.07,"body":"their, their own needs, and they"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1529.07,"endTime":1531.17,"body":"don't necessarily meet yours."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1529.07,"endTime":1531.17,"body":"But I think that there's always"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1531.17,"endTime":1535.13,"body":"been this like, I don't know,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1531.17,"endTime":1535.13,"body":"this, like this toxic this is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1535.13,"endTime":1539.15,"body":"this is what people refer to as"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1535.13,"endTime":1539.15,"body":"toxic masculinity, which is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1539.15,"endTime":1542.21,"body":"like, big, strong male going to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1539.15,"endTime":1542.21,"body":"take what he wants from female"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1542.21,"endTime":1545.9,"body":"kind of monkey crap, you know,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1542.21,"endTime":1545.9,"body":"like, like, really primitive"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1545.9,"endTime":1547.94,"body":"stuff. But I mean, I think that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1545.9,"endTime":1547.94,"body":"for a lot of people, this is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1547.94,"endTime":1551.0,"body":"very real in their"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1547.94,"endTime":1551.0,"body":"relationships. And you are not"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1551.0,"endTime":1553.67,"body":"wrong to say that this makes me"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1551.0,"endTime":1553.67,"body":"uncomfortable just because it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1553.67,"endTime":1557.45,"body":"your husband. Yeah, I think that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1553.67,"endTime":1557.45,"body":"give yourself that, that space"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1557.48,"endTime":1559.79,"body":"to process that. I think that's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1557.48,"endTime":1559.79,"body":"fair. You're hearing it from me."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1559.79,"endTime":1563.27,"body":"I'm telling you, it's okay. It's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1559.79,"endTime":1563.27,"body":"totally okay. Yeah. All right."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1563.27,"endTime":1563.93,"body":"What's next?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1563.99,"endTime":1565.73,"body":"All right."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1563.99,"endTime":1565.73,"body":"microaggressions."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1566.39,"endTime":1568.67,"body":"Oh, yeah, we had notes on"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1566.39,"endTime":1568.67,"body":"this one as well. Yeah. It's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1568.67,"endTime":1571.22,"body":"like household chores"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1568.67,"endTime":1571.22,"body":"based on your gender. You know,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1571.22,"endTime":1576.17,"body":"like, it's your the wife has"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1571.22,"endTime":1576.17,"body":"jobs. The man has jobs like it's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1576.17,"endTime":1576.83,"body":"just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1577.22,"endTime":1579.32,"body":"yeah, like I don't do"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1577.22,"endTime":1579.32,"body":"dishes. That's a woman's job."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1579.5,"endTime":1582.44,"body":"Oh, really? Remember that rule"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1579.5,"endTime":1582.44,"body":"book we keep discussing show me"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1582.44,"endTime":1585.02,"body":"where in the rulebook it says"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1582.44,"endTime":1585.02,"body":"that I'm looking for that rule"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1585.02,"endTime":1587.63,"body":"book and I'm looking on what"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1585.02,"endTime":1587.63,"body":"page and paragraph that's it?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1587.66,"endTime":1588.35,"body":"I'm sure there's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1589.13,"endTime":1593.33,"body":"like yard work, right."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1589.13,"endTime":1593.33,"body":"Paige has waited at y'all. She's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1593.33,"endTime":1595.61,"body":"seen it. She's out there"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1593.33,"endTime":1595.61,"body":"whacking weeds like,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1595.85,"endTime":1598.16,"body":"boss. Oh, I need to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1595.85,"endTime":1598.16,"body":"repost that picture. wouldn't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1598.16,"endTime":1599.57,"body":"believe it, man. She's out"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1598.16,"endTime":1599.57,"body":"there."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1599.57,"endTime":1603.56,"body":"My boots like, yeah, we"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1599.57,"endTime":1603.56,"body":"would tackle the yard like no"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1603.56,"endTime":1606.44,"body":"one's business. Yeah. Then I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1603.56,"endTime":1606.44,"body":"come and sign but an apron on"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1606.44,"endTime":1609.77,"body":"Amin, you are doing dishes like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1606.44,"endTime":1609.77,"body":"no one's business. Yeah. You"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1609.77,"endTime":1610.88,"body":"know, we don't necessarily"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1611.12,"endTime":1613.04,"body":"taking the trash out."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1611.12,"endTime":1613.04,"body":"I'll take the trash out."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1613.07,"endTime":1614.06,"body":"I'll take the trash out."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1614.24,"endTime":1617.24,"body":"I have no, I have no beef"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1614.24,"endTime":1617.24,"body":"with that. Like, okay. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1617.33,"endTime":1620.0,"body":"but but are the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1617.33,"endTime":1620.0,"body":"relationships probably maybe a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1620.0,"endTime":1623.15,"body":"little different? I would say"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1620.0,"endTime":1623.15,"body":"yeah. I'd say that. Pretty good"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1623.15,"endTime":1627.11,"body":"at this season. Everyone's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1623.15,"endTime":1627.11,"body":"reality. I think that's for some"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1627.11,"endTime":1629.12,"body":"people, there are these"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1627.11,"endTime":1629.12,"body":"microaggressions that make you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1629.12,"endTime":1632.69,"body":"uncomfortable? Or it's like,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1629.12,"endTime":1632.69,"body":"maybe you've got a chauvinistic"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1632.69,"endTime":1635.96,"body":"person in your life that feels"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1632.69,"endTime":1635.96,"body":"like there are women and there"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1635.96,"endTime":1639.56,"body":"are men and men are somehow"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1635.96,"endTime":1639.56,"body":"above that. Or vice versa. Maybe"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1639.56,"endTime":1641.54,"body":"that could go the other way."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1639.56,"endTime":1641.54,"body":"Maybe you're a man or man"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1641.54,"endTime":1644.03,"body":"listening. And like you're told"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1641.54,"endTime":1644.03,"body":"that you're nothing, women are"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1644.06,"endTime":1647.54,"body":"superior, whatever else, but"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1644.06,"endTime":1647.54,"body":"microaggressions can be really"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1647.54,"endTime":1651.2,"body":"hurtful and make people"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1647.54,"endTime":1651.2,"body":"uncomfortable. Yeah. All right."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1651.23,"endTime":1655.04,"body":"So let's go through. So we just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1651.23,"endTime":1655.04,"body":"described some of the behaviors"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1655.04,"endTime":1656.84,"body":"that make you feel"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1655.04,"endTime":1656.84,"body":"uncomfortable, right, some of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1656.84,"endTime":1661.07,"body":"these things. Maybe you can live"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1656.84,"endTime":1661.07,"body":"with some of them to some"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1661.07,"endTime":1665.39,"body":"degree? Absolutely. What are non"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1661.07,"endTime":1665.39,"body":"negotiables? Okay, so first of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1665.39,"endTime":1666.95,"body":"all, what's a non negotiable?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1667.07,"endTime":1669.08,"body":"This is something that"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1667.07,"endTime":1669.08,"body":"you're just not going to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1669.08,"endTime":1672.08,"body":"tolerate here. You, right? I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1669.08,"endTime":1672.08,"body":"mean, like, you can set a"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1672.08,"endTime":1677.96,"body":"boundary up with these if you're"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1672.08,"endTime":1677.96,"body":"comfortable. But if it is, if"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1677.96,"endTime":1682.76,"body":"that boundary is crossed, by"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1677.96,"endTime":1682.76,"body":"like, no, but Matt and I have"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1683.03,"endTime":1686.15,"body":"one specific non negotiable that"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1683.03,"endTime":1686.15,"body":"we've had since we've been"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1686.15,"endTime":1690.35,"body":"together, and if either one of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1686.15,"endTime":1690.35,"body":"us does this, we are gone. And"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1690.35,"endTime":1693.5,"body":"it is not even going to be a"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1690.35,"endTime":1693.5,"body":"discussion, there's not going to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1693.5,"endTime":1695.72,"body":"be a discussion about it, there"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1693.5,"endTime":1695.72,"body":"will not be therapy about it,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1695.72,"endTime":1698.45,"body":"there will not be work towards"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1695.72,"endTime":1698.45,"body":"it. This is going to be like"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1698.45,"endTime":1702.41,"body":"peace out. You betrayed me so"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1698.45,"endTime":1702.41,"body":"much. And I'm gone. And that is"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1702.44,"endTime":1702.98,"body":"cheating."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1703.399,"endTime":1705.229,"body":"Yeah. And that might be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1703.399,"endTime":1705.229,"body":"controversial, because I know"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1705.229,"endTime":1708.349,"body":"that some people have worked"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1705.229,"endTime":1708.349,"body":"through it. Yeah. This is just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1708.349,"endTime":1711.169,"body":"our personal perspective on it."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1708.349,"endTime":1711.169,"body":"I think it's a wonderful thing."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1711.169,"endTime":1714.229,"body":"If you're able to do that man"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1711.169,"endTime":1714.229,"body":"more power to you. For us from"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1714.229,"endTime":1717.379,"body":"day one. It's like, I'm going to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1714.229,"endTime":1717.379,"body":"give you everything, and I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1717.379,"endTime":1721.249,"body":"expect everything in return."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1717.379,"endTime":1721.249,"body":"Please don't break that. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1721.249,"endTime":1722.899,"body":"And that for us was always been"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1721.249,"endTime":1722.899,"body":"one. It's like,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1723.35,"endTime":1727.25,"body":"like, No, I couldn't I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1723.35,"endTime":1727.25,"body":"can't get past that. I can't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1727.25,"endTime":1731.24,"body":"come back from that. So and the"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1727.25,"endTime":1731.24,"body":"other one that I think that that"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1731.24,"endTime":1738.29,"body":"I have for you is substance"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1731.24,"endTime":1738.29,"body":"abuse, if you were to pick up a"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1738.29,"endTime":1741.32,"body":"drink, or if you were going to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1738.29,"endTime":1741.32,"body":"do pills, or do drugs again,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1741.32,"endTime":1744.44,"body":"like I'm gone. That's my non"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1741.32,"endTime":1744.44,"body":"negotiable boundary these days."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1744.74,"endTime":1748.07,"body":"Yeah. Harmful addictions."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1744.74,"endTime":1748.07,"body":"Any type of harmful addiction."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1748.1,"endTime":1750.2,"body":"Yeah. And I think that that's a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1748.1,"endTime":1750.2,"body":"fair boundary to have"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1750.2,"endTime":1751.46,"body":"considering my past."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1752.03,"endTime":1754.94,"body":"Yeah, because when you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1752.03,"endTime":1754.94,"body":"have the harmful addiction, all"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1754.94,"endTime":1758.12,"body":"this other shit comes into play"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1754.94,"endTime":1758.12,"body":"with it. It's not just the"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1758.15,"endTime":1762.02,"body":"addict or the alcoholic. It's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1758.15,"endTime":1762.02,"body":"the behaviors that come along"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1762.02,"endTime":1765.77,"body":"with that. That is so bad for"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1762.02,"endTime":1765.77,"body":"you. This is so unhealthy in"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1765.77,"endTime":1766.58,"body":"your relationship."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1766.88,"endTime":1770.03,"body":"I've even told you if I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1766.88,"endTime":1770.03,"body":"somehow convinced you that I'm"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1770.03,"endTime":1772.25,"body":"cool. 30 years from now, and I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1770.03,"endTime":1772.25,"body":"haven't touched the drink. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1772.25,"endTime":1775.79,"body":"somehow I've convinced you that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1772.25,"endTime":1775.79,"body":"it's cool for me to drink. Run."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1775.85,"endTime":1779.09,"body":"Yeah, just run. Yeah, go Don't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1775.85,"endTime":1779.09,"body":"even say a word patched up and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1779.09,"endTime":1782.48,"body":"leave because something bad is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1779.09,"endTime":1782.48,"body":"going on inside. Yep. Get out,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1782.48,"endTime":1786.32,"body":"man. Yes, we're in a bad place."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1782.48,"endTime":1786.32,"body":"Some other non negotiables might"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1786.32,"endTime":1787.4,"body":"be lying."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1787.58,"endTime":1791.0,"body":"Yeah, I wanted to talk"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1787.58,"endTime":1791.0,"body":"about that one. So Matt lied to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1791.0,"endTime":1795.92,"body":"me a lot for many years. But the"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1791.0,"endTime":1795.92,"body":"thing is, is that I was in such"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1795.92,"endTime":1799.31,"body":"denial that I didn't know that"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1795.92,"endTime":1799.31,"body":"he was lying because he was"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1799.34,"endTime":1803.3,"body":"eight Damn good liar. But these"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1799.34,"endTime":1803.3,"body":"days that's a non negotiable for"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1803.3,"endTime":1807.98,"body":"me because one of my values is,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1803.3,"endTime":1807.98,"body":"you know, honesty. So if you're"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1807.98,"endTime":1812.6,"body":"going to lie to me, even small"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1807.98,"endTime":1812.6,"body":"stuff like that just shows me"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1812.6,"endTime":1813.89,"body":"that you don't respect me."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1814.64,"endTime":1819.02,"body":"I agree with that. Yeah. I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1814.64,"endTime":1819.02,"body":"don't lie. No, you don't. Even"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1819.02,"endTime":1821.69,"body":"if it's like some really crappy"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1819.02,"endTime":1821.69,"body":"news I have to deliver. I'm"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1821.69,"endTime":1823.31,"body":"gonna be honest about it. It's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1821.69,"endTime":1823.31,"body":"really"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1823.31,"endTime":1827.15,"body":"wild. How you have"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1823.31,"endTime":1827.15,"body":"shifted in that because I you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1827.18,"endTime":1830.45,"body":"like I said, You lied so much."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1827.18,"endTime":1830.45,"body":"It was your whole life was a"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1830.45,"endTime":1830.96,"body":"lie."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1831.35,"endTime":1833.54,"body":"Yeah, I was a chameleon"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1831.35,"endTime":1833.54,"body":"like everything was revolved"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1833.54,"endTime":1836.81,"body":"around like half truths at best."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1833.54,"endTime":1836.81,"body":"Yeah. And you can't lie now."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1836.84,"endTime":1838.28,"body":"It's like a thing. No,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1836.84,"endTime":1838.28,"body":"it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1838.28,"endTime":1841.85,"body":"like, movie liar. Liar."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1838.28,"endTime":1841.85,"body":"Yeah, right. Yeah, I wish my dad"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1841.85,"endTime":1844.91,"body":"could not tell a lie. That"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1841.85,"endTime":1844.91,"body":"happened to me. I know. I can't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1844.91,"endTime":1849.26,"body":"lie. And even if I feel like I'm"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1844.91,"endTime":1849.26,"body":"doing something, like a little"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1849.26,"endTime":1852.8,"body":"dishonest, I have a conversation"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1849.26,"endTime":1852.8,"body":"with her about it. So we've got"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1852.8,"endTime":1855.11,"body":"boundaries around what's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1852.8,"endTime":1855.11,"body":"discussed it work and what's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1855.11,"endTime":1858.35,"body":"not. And it's been something"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1855.11,"endTime":1858.35,"body":"I've respected for a long time."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1858.35,"endTime":1862.19,"body":"But we were in the car together."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1858.35,"endTime":1862.19,"body":"We the road trip, I think we're"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1862.19,"endTime":1864.77,"body":"driving down to grab the kids."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1862.19,"endTime":1864.77,"body":"It's like three hours middle the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1864.77,"endTime":1867.35,"body":"night. And I was like, I've got"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1864.77,"endTime":1867.35,"body":"something I have to discuss with"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1867.35,"endTime":1869.78,"body":"you. Because it's just I feel"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1867.35,"endTime":1869.78,"body":"like I've been dishonest here."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1870.11,"endTime":1872.51,"body":"And I'm not sure I want your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1870.11,"endTime":1872.51,"body":"perspective on it. Now I have"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1872.51,"endTime":1875.6,"body":"the same conversations with my"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1872.51,"endTime":1875.6,"body":"with my sponsor, my 12 Step"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1875.6,"endTime":1878.54,"body":"sponsor. And I do the same"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1875.6,"endTime":1878.54,"body":"thing. I call them up and it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1878.54,"endTime":1883.07,"body":"like, Man, I need to bounce this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1878.54,"endTime":1883.07,"body":"off view. Feels kind of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1883.07,"endTime":1886.22,"body":"borderline. And then you talk"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1883.07,"endTime":1886.22,"body":"about it, even if it feels a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1886.22,"endTime":1888.62,"body":"little bit off. I'm having a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1886.22,"endTime":1888.62,"body":"conversation about it. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1889.07,"endTime":1892.91,"body":"That's yeah, honesty is one of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1889.07,"endTime":1892.91,"body":"my values as well. Yeah, has to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1892.91,"endTime":1895.79,"body":"be has to be in order for me to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1892.91,"endTime":1895.79,"body":"maintain this this life that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1895.79,"endTime":1901.01,"body":"we've built. Another one,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1895.79,"endTime":1901.01,"body":"emotional or physical abuse. So"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1901.01,"endTime":1904.46,"body":"we talked about the emotional"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1901.01,"endTime":1904.46,"body":"abuse, when we talked about"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1904.49,"endTime":1907.67,"body":"invalidating someone's feelings."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1904.49,"endTime":1907.67,"body":"And so another part of that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1907.67,"endTime":1911.06,"body":"would be physical abuse, which"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1907.67,"endTime":1911.06,"body":"is actually harming someone or"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1911.09,"endTime":1913.46,"body":"putting them in a position where"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1911.09,"endTime":1913.46,"body":"they feel like they could be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1913.46,"endTime":1916.82,"body":"harmed, like threatened. That"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1913.46,"endTime":1916.82,"body":"kind of stuff. That for a lot of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1916.82,"endTime":1920.39,"body":"folks, that's a non negotiable."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1916.82,"endTime":1920.39,"body":"Yep, absolutely not tolerated."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1920.87,"endTime":1924.56,"body":"Another one is disrespect for"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1920.87,"endTime":1924.56,"body":"boundaries, respecting personal"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1924.56,"endTime":1927.2,"body":"boundaries, and not tolerating"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1924.56,"endTime":1927.2,"body":"others who consistently"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1927.26,"endTime":1931.67,"body":"disregard them. Man, there's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1927.26,"endTime":1931.67,"body":"some perpetual line steppers out"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1931.67,"endTime":1934.61,"body":"there in the world as Dave"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1931.67,"endTime":1934.61,"body":"Chappelle refer to them as just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1934.61,"endTime":1937.79,"body":"people who just can't help"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1934.61,"endTime":1937.79,"body":"themselves, but by stepping over"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1937.79,"endTime":1940.31,"body":"boundaries. And so if you've got"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1937.79,"endTime":1940.31,"body":"someone like this in your life,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1940.31,"endTime":1944.36,"body":"and it's like, you are a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1940.31,"endTime":1944.36,"body":"perpetual line stepper, and I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1944.36,"endTime":1947.48,"body":"will no longer tolerate it. That"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1944.36,"endTime":1947.48,"body":"can be a non negotiable. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1947.51,"endTime":1950.81,"body":"where it's like, I'm just, it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1947.51,"endTime":1950.81,"body":"probably best that we just don't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1950.81,"endTime":1951.62,"body":"communicate anymore."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1951.65,"endTime":1954.95,"body":"Yeah, it sounds like that"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1951.65,"endTime":1954.95,"body":"saying, fool me once. Shame on"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1954.95,"endTime":1958.07,"body":"you fool me. Twice. Shame on me."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1954.95,"endTime":1958.07,"body":"Yeah, that's how the a lot of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1958.07,"endTime":1962.51,"body":"these boundaries come into play."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1958.07,"endTime":1962.51,"body":"I always put that in my head all"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1962.51,"endTime":1965.36,"body":"the time. I'm like, Oh, yeah."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1962.51,"endTime":1965.36,"body":"Now that's all me if I allowed"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":1965.36,"endTime":1966.98,"body":"you to keep doing it to me. Yep."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1968.03,"endTime":1971.12,"body":"Another one. This is this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1968.03,"endTime":1971.12,"body":"is a big one to discrimination"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1971.12,"endTime":1975.62,"body":"or prejudice. Yep. rejecting any"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1971.12,"endTime":1975.62,"body":"form of discrimination from"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1975.62,"endTime":1978.89,"body":"people. So whether that's based"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1975.62,"endTime":1978.89,"body":"on race, gender, religion,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1978.89,"endTime":1982.64,"body":"sexual orientation, any"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1978.89,"endTime":1982.64,"body":"characteristic of someone that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1982.64,"endTime":1985.25,"body":"is just innate in them, it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1982.64,"endTime":1985.25,"body":"it's congenital, it's something"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1985.25,"endTime":1988.46,"body":"that these things are not"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1985.25,"endTime":1988.46,"body":"tolerated. Like these can be non"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1988.46,"endTime":1992.72,"body":"negotiables. That is totally"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1988.46,"endTime":1992.72,"body":"fine. If you were married to a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1992.72,"endTime":1995.36,"body":"racist, like, can you say that's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1992.72,"endTime":1995.36,"body":"a non negotiable? That's fair,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1995.36,"endTime":1999.14,"body":"y'all. Yeah, totally cool. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1995.36,"endTime":1999.14,"body":"But that's not normal behavior,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1999.14,"endTime":2002.59,"body":"absolutely. More than fine, you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":1999.14,"endTime":2002.59,"body":"put a, you put a non negotiable"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2002.59,"endTime":2005.05,"body":"boundary in place because of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2002.59,"endTime":2005.05,"body":"that. So these are things that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2005.05,"endTime":2006.64,"body":"make you feel uncomfortable once"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2005.05,"endTime":2006.64,"body":"again, as we're kind of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2006.64,"endTime":2009.58,"body":"discussing this. And these will"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2006.64,"endTime":2009.58,"body":"in turn help you set boundaries,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2009.58,"endTime":2012.76,"body":"which we will discuss in our"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2009.58,"endTime":2012.76,"body":"next episode, we got a few more"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2012.76,"endTime":2014.44,"body":"to roll through here. What's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2012.76,"endTime":2014.44,"body":"next betrayal"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2014.44,"endTime":2015.01,"body":"of trust?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2015.04,"endTime":2016.27,"body":"Okay, roll through that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2015.04,"endTime":2016.27,"body":"well, having"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2016.27,"endTime":2018.58,"body":"a strong stance against"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2016.27,"endTime":2018.58,"body":"betraying the trust of others,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2018.58,"endTime":2021.1,"body":"such as sharing confidential"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2018.58,"endTime":2021.1,"body":"information or breaking"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2021.1,"endTime":2021.76,"body":"promises, yes,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2021.76,"endTime":2022.36,"body":"stories here."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2022.45,"endTime":2025.87,"body":"I do have stories here."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2022.45,"endTime":2025.87,"body":"Matt, betrayed my trust a few"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2025.87,"endTime":2028.96,"body":"times back in the day. It's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2025.87,"endTime":2028.96,"body":"honestly one of the things that"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2028.96,"endTime":2032.41,"body":"I haven't. I'm not resentful"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2028.96,"endTime":2032.41,"body":"towards it. But it's something"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2032.41,"endTime":2037.6,"body":"that I'm very aware of, you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2032.41,"endTime":2037.6,"body":"know, when I do share certain"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2037.6,"endTime":2042.25,"body":"things, because he, I would tell"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2037.6,"endTime":2042.25,"body":"him things in confidence. And he"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2042.25,"endTime":2046.42,"body":"would go and share that with"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2042.25,"endTime":2046.42,"body":"people that he wasn't supposed"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2046.42,"endTime":2050.02,"body":"to be sharing it with. And he"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2046.42,"endTime":2050.02,"body":"would tell me that he shared it,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2050.05,"endTime":2052.48,"body":"or I would find out through the"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2050.05,"endTime":2052.48,"body":"grapevine that he shared it, and"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2052.48,"endTime":2056.47,"body":"then whenever I would bring it"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2052.48,"endTime":2056.47,"body":"up to him, he would say, That's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2056.47,"endTime":2059.71,"body":"stupid. Who cares? You know? So"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2056.47,"endTime":2059.71,"body":"what if I said anything? If I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2059.71,"endTime":2063.13,"body":"said something, it's not a big"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2059.71,"endTime":2063.13,"body":"deal page. And that kind of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2063.13,"endTime":2065.89,"body":"pissed me off. I mean, that's,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2063.13,"endTime":2065.89,"body":"you're betraying my trust, and"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2065.89,"endTime":2070.42,"body":"I'm trying to piss you off. It"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2065.89,"endTime":2070.42,"body":"was it's big deal stuff. It was"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2070.42,"endTime":2070.87,"body":"no, it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2070.87,"endTime":2073.0,"body":"wasn't like little piddly"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2070.87,"endTime":2073.0,"body":"crap. It was like something and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2073.0,"endTime":2076.51,"body":"then I would tell someone that I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2073.0,"endTime":2076.51,"body":"trusted and I assume that she"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2076.51,"endTime":2078.64,"body":"would trust as well. But that's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2076.51,"endTime":2078.64,"body":"not the case. She was just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2078.64,"endTime":2082.36,"body":"telling me and she wanted it to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2078.64,"endTime":2082.36,"body":"stop there. And then, you know,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2082.72,"endTime":2085.96,"body":"yeah, so I'm at the point now"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2082.72,"endTime":2085.96,"body":"where if I get information that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2085.96,"endTime":2089.35,"body":"goes into the law, it goes in"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2085.96,"endTime":2089.35,"body":"the in the safe and throw away"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2089.35,"endTime":2090.28,"body":"the key, you know,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2090.31,"endTime":2093.52,"body":"yeah, yeah, stays there."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2090.31,"endTime":2093.52,"body":"But I do have"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2093.55,"endTime":2095.29,"body":"to be careful on"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2093.55,"endTime":2095.29,"body":"something. Yeah, that can be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2095.44,"endTime":2097.72,"body":"that can be a steal. That's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2095.44,"endTime":2097.72,"body":"taken"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2097.72,"endTime":2100.72,"body":"a long time for me to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2097.72,"endTime":2100.72,"body":"share the serious thing. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2102.43,"endTime":2103.15,"body":"Do the next one."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2103.24,"endTime":2106.33,"body":"Okay, so yeah, once again,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2103.24,"endTime":2106.33,"body":"kind of going back to the, the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2106.33,"endTime":2110.98,"body":"personal space, the touching"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2106.33,"endTime":2110.98,"body":"consent, violation of consent,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2111.01,"endTime":2113.86,"body":"this can be in a marriage as"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2111.01,"endTime":2113.86,"body":"well. So respecting the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2113.86,"endTime":2118.99,"body":"importance of consent in all of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2113.86,"endTime":2118.99,"body":"your interactions. You know,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2119.14,"endTime":2123.52,"body":"I've heard stories where this is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2119.14,"endTime":2123.52,"body":"for men where it's like, they"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2123.52,"endTime":2128.74,"body":"feel like it is a woman's duty"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2123.52,"endTime":2128.74,"body":"to provide sex, basically. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2128.77,"endTime":2132.91,"body":"And I'm like, that is, man, I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2128.77,"endTime":2132.91,"body":"don't think that's how it works."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2133.09,"endTime":2136.87,"body":"Um, I don't know, maybe to each"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2133.09,"endTime":2136.87,"body":"their own. But that sounds like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2137.59,"endTime":2139.87,"body":"That sounds pretty toxic to me."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2137.59,"endTime":2139.87,"body":"I think real"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2139.9,"endTime":2143.26,"body":"how we speak. Like, we"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2139.9,"endTime":2143.26,"body":"have strong opinions on this,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2143.47,"endTime":2146.56,"body":"man. It's it's sorry, to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2143.47,"endTime":2146.56,"body":"be honest, sorry."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2147.43,"endTime":2149.56,"body":"This is to fall"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2147.43,"endTime":2149.56,"body":"authenticity. You're right."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2149.56,"endTime":2153.46,"body":"Something that we don't condone."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2149.56,"endTime":2153.46,"body":"I think it's, it's icky. And"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2153.46,"endTime":2156.31,"body":"it's gross. And if that's what"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2153.46,"endTime":2156.31,"body":"you do, you might want to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2156.31,"endTime":2158.59,"body":"question something, you might"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2156.31,"endTime":2158.59,"body":"want to question that, because"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2158.59,"endTime":2161.59,"body":"that's not. Yeah, no."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2161.65,"endTime":2165.34,"body":"I mean, like, as a guy,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2161.65,"endTime":2165.34,"body":"like, why would you ever want to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2165.34,"endTime":2168.19,"body":"be with someone who didn't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2165.34,"endTime":2168.19,"body":"necessarily consent to it? Like,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2168.22,"endTime":2171.88,"body":"even if it's your wife? Like,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2168.22,"endTime":2171.88,"body":"it's not the that's not? It's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2171.88,"endTime":2172.69,"body":"not enjoyable?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2172.72,"endTime":2175.57,"body":"No, and it's not"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2172.72,"endTime":2175.57,"body":"intimate. And it's not like, it"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2175.57,"endTime":2179.35,"body":"doesn't build your relationship"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2175.57,"endTime":2179.35,"body":"to a better place. It actually,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2179.38,"endTime":2182.32,"body":"it's a transaction. It is, it's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2179.38,"endTime":2182.32,"body":"transactional, and it kind of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2182.32,"endTime":2184.57,"body":"breaks that trust a little bit."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2182.32,"endTime":2184.57,"body":"I think"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2184.6,"endTime":2187.66,"body":"it's so screwed up. I just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2184.6,"endTime":2187.66,"body":"think about, like me and you,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2187.66,"endTime":2191.29,"body":"like, when I'm into you, and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2187.66,"endTime":2191.29,"body":"you're into me, like, this stuff"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2191.29,"endTime":2194.29,"body":"just happens on its own? Right?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2191.29,"endTime":2194.29,"body":"You will just force it."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2194.32,"endTime":2197.56,"body":"No, no, and it's not like"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2194.32,"endTime":2197.56,"body":"a reward system, either."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2197.59,"endTime":2200.05,"body":"But I think for a lot of a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2197.59,"endTime":2200.05,"body":"lot of people, probably a lot of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2200.05,"endTime":2202.42,"body":"women like this is the reality"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2200.05,"endTime":2202.42,"body":"they live in where it's like,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2202.42,"endTime":2204.76,"body":"their husband is just like sort"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2202.42,"endTime":2204.76,"body":"of forces themselves on him."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2205.96,"endTime":2209.44,"body":"That's totally okay to say that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2205.96,"endTime":2209.44,"body":"that's not okay. But like, I am"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2209.44,"endTime":2213.22,"body":"not your domestic prostitute."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2209.44,"endTime":2213.22,"body":"Like, I am a human being dammit,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2213.22,"endTime":2216.52,"body":"like, you can't treat me like"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2213.22,"endTime":2216.52,"body":"this. That's totally fine. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2216.52,"endTime":2219.58,"body":"there's a violation of consent."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2216.52,"endTime":2219.58,"body":"They're married or not like, I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2219.58,"endTime":2222.25,"body":"don't care. I don't care. I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2219.58,"endTime":2222.25,"body":"don't want to get into the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2222.25,"endTime":2225.49,"body":"legality of all this crap and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2222.25,"endTime":2225.49,"body":"whatnot. This is just how I feel"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2225.49,"endTime":2228.7,"body":"about it. My perspective is that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2225.49,"endTime":2228.7,"body":"this is someone that you love,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2228.7,"endTime":2232.57,"body":"and you chose, I mean, you You"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2228.7,"endTime":2232.57,"body":"swore to, to honor and to hold"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2232.57,"endTime":2237.13,"body":"dear and to respect and that is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2232.57,"endTime":2237.13,"body":"anything but anything, but I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2237.13,"endTime":2240.22,"body":"agree. And I can I can say for"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2237.13,"endTime":2240.22,"body":"sure that I've never done this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2240.22,"endTime":2246.04,"body":"to you. Because what would be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2240.22,"endTime":2246.04,"body":"the fun at it anyway? Yeah, it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2246.04,"endTime":2247.39,"body":"ridiculous. It feels?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2247.81,"endTime":2249.28,"body":"I don't know. I don't I"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2247.81,"endTime":2249.28,"body":"feel like we're gonna have a"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2249.28,"endTime":2251.59,"body":"whole conversation on this. So"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2249.28,"endTime":2251.59,"body":"we're gonna keep going on to the"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2251.59,"endTime":2252.1,"body":"next one. I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2252.1,"endTime":2258.22,"body":"like to earn my dinner."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2252.1,"endTime":2258.22,"body":"Okay. Oh, my God."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2259.54,"endTime":2261.25,"body":"All right. So we already"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2259.54,"endTime":2261.25,"body":"touched on the harmful"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2261.25,"endTime":2264.61,"body":"addictions, that can be a non"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2261.25,"endTime":2264.61,"body":"negotiable thing. Did you have"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2264.61,"endTime":2265.63,"body":"anything to add on that one?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2265.84,"endTime":2273.76,"body":"On the addiction? Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2265.84,"endTime":2273.76,"body":"yeah. So um, everyone's recovery"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2273.76,"endTime":2278.26,"body":"looks different. Right. And for"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2273.76,"endTime":2278.26,"body":"a lot of people, they will say"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2278.32,"endTime":2282.01,"body":"something that I think is total"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2278.32,"endTime":2282.01,"body":"BS. But people will say relapse"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2282.01,"endTime":2285.67,"body":"is part of recovery. Okay. Is it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2282.01,"endTime":2285.67,"body":"a fact? Yes, it is that relapse"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2285.67,"endTime":2289.45,"body":"is part of recovery. But does it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2285.67,"endTime":2289.45,"body":"have to be? No, it doesn't have"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2289.45,"endTime":2292.72,"body":"to be part of recovery. I've"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2289.45,"endTime":2292.72,"body":"literally heard people before"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2292.72,"endTime":2296.41,"body":"they went into treatment, say,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2292.72,"endTime":2296.41,"body":"relapse as part of recovery,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2296.41,"endTime":2299.41,"body":"which sounds to me like a self"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2296.41,"endTime":2299.41,"body":"fulfilling prophecy. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2299.44,"endTime":2301.21,"body":"You're just waiting for"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2299.44,"endTime":2301.21,"body":"that moment. You're"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2301.21,"endTime":2304.6,"body":"not serious about this."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2301.21,"endTime":2304.6,"body":"Now, I am a one chip wonder. I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2304.6,"endTime":2307.63,"body":"picked up one desire chip was"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2304.6,"endTime":2307.63,"body":"which is an outward symbol of an"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2307.63,"endTime":2310.9,"body":"inward desire to stay sober for"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2307.63,"endTime":2310.9,"body":"the next 24 hours as they are so"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2310.9,"endTime":2313.57,"body":"rare, but it's doable, but I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2310.9,"endTime":2313.57,"body":"picked it up and I'm like, You"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2313.57,"endTime":2316.96,"body":"know what? This is it for me."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2313.57,"endTime":2316.96,"body":"I'm doing this shit. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2316.99,"endTime":2319.66,"body":"relax, doesn't have to be part"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2316.99,"endTime":2319.66,"body":"of this. Now. I don't know what"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2319.66,"endTime":2322.96,"body":"happens tomorrow. And I've never"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2319.66,"endTime":2322.96,"body":"sworn off of drinking forever."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2322.99,"endTime":2326.26,"body":"And I refuse to do that. I'm not"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2322.99,"endTime":2326.26,"body":"drinking today, because I got a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2326.26,"endTime":2329.89,"body":"tiny little, like hamster brain."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2326.26,"endTime":2329.89,"body":"And the only way it works is if"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2329.89,"endTime":2333.22,"body":"I say I'm not drinking today,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2329.89,"endTime":2333.22,"body":"I'm just gonna do that again"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2333.22,"endTime":2336.19,"body":"tomorrow, and it's probably"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2333.22,"endTime":2336.19,"body":"gonna go well, for me. Yeah. But"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2336.25,"endTime":2340.87,"body":"to say that relapse is part of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2336.25,"endTime":2340.87,"body":"recovery. Okay. Yes, it is. But"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2340.96,"endTime":2344.5,"body":"what is what is the person's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2340.96,"endTime":2344.5,"body":"intention with that, right?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2344.5,"endTime":2348.31,"body":"Yeah. Like, if I were to get"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2344.5,"endTime":2348.31,"body":"into a really bad space and go"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2348.31,"endTime":2350.59,"body":"through another tough time, and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2348.31,"endTime":2350.59,"body":"like I had a relapse, I don't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2350.59,"endTime":2354.67,"body":"think he would just walk out."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2350.59,"endTime":2354.67,"body":"But I think that things would be"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2354.67,"endTime":2359.8,"body":"on extremely thin ice. Extremely"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2354.67,"endTime":2359.8,"body":"thin ice since like, okay,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2359.8,"endTime":2362.2,"body":"you've done this before."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2359.8,"endTime":2362.2,"body":"Obviously, something went wrong."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2362.2,"endTime":2364.42,"body":"But I think that at some point,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2362.2,"endTime":2364.42,"body":"that would be a non negotiable"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2364.42,"endTime":2368.08,"body":"for you if I continued with it."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2364.42,"endTime":2368.08,"body":"You know, and listen, yeah, it's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2368.08,"endTime":2370.81,"body":"addiction disease. Sure it is."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2368.08,"endTime":2370.81,"body":"Yeah. But it's also the most"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2370.81,"endTime":2372.58,"body":"annoying disease that exists."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2370.81,"endTime":2372.58,"body":"And"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2372.58,"endTime":2374.92,"body":"that's a totally other"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2372.58,"endTime":2374.92,"body":"episode. Okay. But we've had to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2374.92,"endTime":2377.17,"body":"go down this hole. Well, because"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2374.92,"endTime":2377.17,"body":"people are like, well, they're"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2377.17,"endTime":2380.74,"body":"relapsing. I know, but there's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2377.17,"endTime":2380.74,"body":"so much more to it than that. We"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2380.74,"endTime":2382.24,"body":"have a different animal disease,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2382.27,"endTime":2384.82,"body":"and we'll get into that."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2382.27,"endTime":2384.82,"body":"Yeah. But anyway, when it comes"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2384.82,"endTime":2387.64,"body":"to harmful addictions, if this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2384.82,"endTime":2387.64,"body":"is something that's negatively"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2387.82,"endTime":2391.72,"body":"negatively impacting their life"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2387.82,"endTime":2391.72,"body":"and your life that is totally"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2391.72,"endTime":2395.41,"body":"cool to say that this is a non"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2391.72,"endTime":2395.41,"body":"negotiable for me. This is a non"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2395.41,"endTime":2398.23,"body":"starter. Not even going further"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2395.41,"endTime":2398.23,"body":"than that with it. Yep. Alright,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2398.23,"endTime":2398.59,"body":"what's next"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2398.62,"endTime":2400.69,"body":"or the next one is an"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2398.62,"endTime":2400.69,"body":"ephah. Call behavior."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2401.5,"endTime":2402.22,"body":"This is you,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2402.28,"endTime":2406.48,"body":"this is me. Go for it."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2402.28,"endTime":2406.48,"body":"No, if you were to do anything"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2406.48,"endTime":2411.94,"body":"like unethical, I'd be like bye"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2406.48,"endTime":2411.94,"body":"because that goes against all of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2411.94,"endTime":2417.49,"body":"my values. Like I just don't you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2411.94,"endTime":2417.49,"body":"go rob a bank or you go do"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2417.49,"endTime":2421.21,"body":"something. That's what what are"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2417.49,"endTime":2421.21,"body":"some examples I had that I had"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2421.21,"endTime":2424.75,"body":"written down and then unethical"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2421.21,"endTime":2424.75,"body":"behavior? Yeah, I mean, I don't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2424.75,"endTime":2427.42,"body":"know. Okay, like cheating on the"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2424.75,"endTime":2427.42,"body":"tax on your taxes. Yeah. Don't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2427.42,"endTime":2430.18,"body":"mess with the IRS do never don't"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2427.42,"endTime":2430.18,"body":"do that kind of shit that would"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2430.39,"endTime":2434.47,"body":"take us out of town for that."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2430.39,"endTime":2434.47,"body":"Yeah, absolutely. What else?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2434.5,"endTime":2436.72,"body":"I mean, if you I don't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2434.5,"endTime":2436.72,"body":"know, I think so. My favorite"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2436.72,"endTime":2440.14,"body":"show of all time is Sopranos."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2436.72,"endTime":2440.14,"body":"And possibly my favorite"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2440.14,"endTime":2444.07,"body":"character of all time is Carmela"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2440.14,"endTime":2444.07,"body":"soprano. And as much as I love,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2444.49,"endTime":2449.53,"body":"Carmela, she tolerated unethical"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2444.49,"endTime":2449.53,"body":"behavior for a very long time."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2449.53,"endTime":2453.31,"body":"And she had the I love her"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2449.53,"endTime":2453.31,"body":"story, because she's, she lives"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2453.31,"endTime":2457.0,"body":"in like this spiritual disgust"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2453.31,"endTime":2457.0,"body":"with herself for what she"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2457.0,"endTime":2460.51,"body":"tolerates, but at the same time,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2457.0,"endTime":2460.51,"body":"it's like, she likes the things"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2460.51,"endTime":2463.18,"body":"that come with it. She kind of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2460.51,"endTime":2463.18,"body":"likes the thrill of it all and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2463.42,"endTime":2467.29,"body":"sort of in on it, but it still"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2463.42,"endTime":2467.29,"body":"eats away at the inside. So if"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2467.29,"endTime":2470.5,"body":"you live with someone that makes"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2467.29,"endTime":2470.5,"body":"their living from unethical"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2470.5,"endTime":2473.8,"body":"behavior, yeah. And you're at a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2470.5,"endTime":2473.8,"body":"point where you feel like I'm"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2473.8,"endTime":2476.68,"body":"just not doing this anymore."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2473.8,"endTime":2476.68,"body":"That's cool. Yeah, I think that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2476.68,"endTime":2478.75,"body":"that's fair, because that it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2476.68,"endTime":2478.75,"body":"that goes back to one of your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2478.75,"endTime":2481.39,"body":"values, and that can be a non"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2478.75,"endTime":2481.39,"body":"negotiable on that value."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2481.45,"endTime":2482.5,"body":"Yep. All right, with"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2484.18,"endTime":2485.89,"body":"lack of accountability."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2484.18,"endTime":2485.89,"body":"The next one?"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2486.129,"endTime":2489.459,"body":"Yeah, I was gonna say,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2486.129,"endTime":2489.459,"body":"what I was gonna say the next"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2489.459,"endTime":2492.039,"body":"one, you beat me to it. I'm"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2489.459,"endTime":2492.039,"body":"sorry. You take it. No, just"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2492.039,"endTime":2494.979,"body":"gonna say lack of lack of"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2492.039,"endTime":2494.979,"body":"accountability. That's a big"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2494.979,"endTime":2495.369,"body":"one."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2495.399,"endTime":2498.939,"body":"This is like, Yeah, huge,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2495.399,"endTime":2498.939,"body":"both like,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2499.18,"endTime":2502.3,"body":"expecting, you know,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2499.18,"endTime":2502.3,"body":"personal accountability, and"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2502.3,"endTime":2505.6,"body":"then refusing to tolerate a"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2502.3,"endTime":2505.6,"body":"pattern of consistently avoiding"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2505.6,"endTime":2509.2,"body":"responsibility for one's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2505.6,"endTime":2509.2,"body":"actions. I know, I just read"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2509.2,"endTime":2512.44,"body":"that. But like, we're so big on"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2509.2,"endTime":2512.44,"body":"personal accountability, you"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2512.44,"endTime":2514.63,"body":"better take responsibility for"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2512.44,"endTime":2514.63,"body":"your actions."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2514.99,"endTime":2517.66,"body":"This is like the biggest"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2514.99,"endTime":2517.66,"body":"one for me. Yeah, like we've"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2517.66,"endTime":2520.3,"body":"talked discussed. And I've said"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2517.66,"endTime":2520.3,"body":"this before, it is a lost art,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2520.54,"endTime":2524.05,"body":"for adults to take"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2520.54,"endTime":2524.05,"body":"accountability these days. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2524.29,"endTime":2527.59,"body":"never more so in the types of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2524.29,"endTime":2527.59,"body":"relationships that we're talking"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2527.59,"endTime":2531.1,"body":"about right now. And for our"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2527.59,"endTime":2531.1,"body":"listeners, and for the people"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2531.1,"endTime":2533.05,"body":"that are in our community, you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2531.1,"endTime":2533.05,"body":"know, what I'm talking about,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2533.08,"endTime":2535.78,"body":"the lack of accountability will"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2533.08,"endTime":2535.78,"body":"blow your mind. It's like you're"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2535.78,"endTime":2539.2,"body":"dealing with a first grader."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2535.78,"endTime":2539.2,"body":"It's like, well, why did you you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2539.2,"endTime":2541.87,"body":"know, why did you do this? Well,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2539.2,"endTime":2541.87,"body":"because Jimmy did it first. It's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2541.87,"endTime":2545.68,"body":"like, that's not how life works"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2541.87,"endTime":2545.68,"body":"when you're 40, man. And this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2545.68,"endTime":2547.57,"body":"one just drives me nuts. It"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2545.68,"endTime":2547.57,"body":"drives me absolutely nuts."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2547.57,"endTime":2551.53,"body":"Because there's still people to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2547.57,"endTime":2551.53,"body":"walk around and every day grown"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2551.53,"endTime":2555.43,"body":"as people with driver's licenses"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2551.53,"endTime":2555.43,"body":"that don't know how to take"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2555.43,"endTime":2558.52,"body":"personal accountability. Yeah,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2555.43,"endTime":2558.52,"body":"like people who are late to work"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2558.55,"endTime":2562.36,"body":"when there was traffic. Okay,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2558.55,"endTime":2562.36,"body":"what time do you get up? Like, I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2562.36,"endTime":2564.82,"body":"shouldn't have to have this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2562.36,"endTime":2564.82,"body":"conversation with an adult,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2564.88,"endTime":2567.28,"body":"we have an episode on"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2564.88,"endTime":2567.28,"body":"accountability. If you want to"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2567.28,"endTime":2571.09,"body":"go back and listen to it. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2567.28,"endTime":2571.09,"body":"Before I just lose, you're gonna"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2571.09,"endTime":2573.1,"body":"go all the way down. But that's"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2571.09,"endTime":2573.1,"body":"a big one. That's a big non"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2573.1,"endTime":2574.45,"body":"negotiable for us. Alright,"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2573.1,"endTime":2574.45,"body":"what's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2574.45,"endTime":2577.63,"body":"the last one mutual"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2574.45,"endTime":2577.63,"body":"growth, mutual growth, this is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2577.63,"endTime":2583.03,"body":"one of ours is one that we"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2577.63,"endTime":2583.03,"body":"created here. mutual growth. So"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2583.03,"endTime":2586.54,"body":"till the wheels fall off,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2583.03,"endTime":2586.54,"body":"doesn't just mean, you stick by"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2586.54,"endTime":2591.46,"body":"someone's side no matter what,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2586.54,"endTime":2591.46,"body":"because we just discussed 13"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2591.49,"endTime":2594.61,"body":"Different non negotiable"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2591.49,"endTime":2594.61,"body":"boundaries that could lead to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2595.0,"endTime":2597.43,"body":"you deciding this person doesn't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2595.0,"endTime":2597.43,"body":"need to be part of your life"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2597.43,"endTime":2600.91,"body":"anymore. What so the wheels fall"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2597.43,"endTime":2600.91,"body":"off really means for us,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2600.94,"endTime":2606.37,"body":"especially is like I promise to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2600.94,"endTime":2606.37,"body":"grow, no matter what. I promise"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2606.37,"endTime":2610.36,"body":"to always try to get better no"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2606.37,"endTime":2610.36,"body":"matter what, like I have made a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2610.36,"endTime":2614.5,"body":"commitment to my personal and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2610.36,"endTime":2614.5,"body":"spiritual growth. And I'm never"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2614.5,"endTime":2617.53,"body":"giving up on that. Yeah. And in"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2614.5,"endTime":2617.53,"body":"turn, I will hold you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2617.53,"endTime":2620.38,"body":"accountable, you will hold me"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2617.53,"endTime":2620.38,"body":"accountable. It's not just"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2620.38,"endTime":2623.5,"body":"saying, no matter what, you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2620.38,"endTime":2623.5,"body":"stick with someone because you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2623.5,"endTime":2627.25,"body":"know, just because yeah, because"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2623.5,"endTime":2627.25,"body":"the rulebook said so stupid,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2627.67,"endTime":2631.27,"body":"stupid rule. So yeah, mutual"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2627.67,"endTime":2631.27,"body":"growth is one of our non"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2631.27,"endTime":2634.84,"body":"negotiables I think the day that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2631.27,"endTime":2634.84,"body":"you see me just decide to mail"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2634.84,"endTime":2638.95,"body":"it in and give up you're gonna"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2634.84,"endTime":2638.95,"body":"be like, dude, better get your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2638.95,"endTime":2641.56,"body":"ass up and get to work. I don't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2638.95,"endTime":2641.56,"body":"know what this is about. Yep."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2641.56,"endTime":2643.93,"body":"Remember our vows. Remember what"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2641.56,"endTime":2643.93,"body":"we promised each other? Yep,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2644.05,"endTime":2647.44,"body":"this is really, really, really"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2644.05,"endTime":2647.44,"body":"important one for us. So we've"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2647.44,"endTime":2649.69,"body":"gone through some non"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2647.44,"endTime":2649.69,"body":"negotiables, we've gone through"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2649.69,"endTime":2652.09,"body":"some common things that may make"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2649.69,"endTime":2652.09,"body":"you feel uncomfortable. And as"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2652.09,"endTime":2655.75,"body":"you're working toward the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2652.09,"endTime":2655.75,"body":"boundaries that you want. Let's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2655.75,"endTime":2659.89,"body":"do this. Keep your list handy"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2655.75,"endTime":2659.89,"body":"from the first episode where you"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2659.89,"endTime":2662.8,"body":"write wrote down what your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2659.89,"endTime":2662.8,"body":"values are. And let's go so"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2662.8,"endTime":2665.65,"body":"through some of these behaviors"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2662.8,"endTime":2665.65,"body":"that we just discussed. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2665.65,"endTime":2669.7,"body":"let's go one step further. Let's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2665.65,"endTime":2669.7,"body":"talk about the person attributed"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2669.7,"endTime":2672.82,"body":"to each of the behaviors. Who"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2669.7,"endTime":2672.82,"body":"were you setting boundaries for?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2672.82,"endTime":2674.95,"body":"Is it everyone? Is it your"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2672.82,"endTime":2674.95,"body":"marriage? Is it your husband,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2674.95,"endTime":2678.19,"body":"your wife? Is it for your kids?"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2674.95,"endTime":2678.19,"body":"Is it for your boss, whoever it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2678.19,"endTime":2682.78,"body":"may be, so that we can really"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2678.19,"endTime":2682.78,"body":"become we want to come right? We"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2682.78,"endTime":2685.15,"body":"want to come prepared for the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2682.78,"endTime":2685.15,"body":"next episode when we really"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2685.15,"endTime":2688.48,"body":"start to set these boundaries."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2685.15,"endTime":2688.48,"body":"So keep the list handy and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2688.48,"endTime":2691.63,"body":"listen on the next episodes and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2688.48,"endTime":2691.63,"body":"use these so we can go ahead and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2691.63,"endTime":2694.57,"body":"set some boundaries for you and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2691.63,"endTime":2694.57,"body":"bring some clarity to this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2694.57,"endTime":2697.9,"body":"process that everyone just tries"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2694.57,"endTime":2697.9,"body":"to make too generic. Yep, that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2697.9,"endTime":2701.53,"body":"we're not we're trying to make"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2697.9,"endTime":2701.53,"body":"this real for you. Guys, I think"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2701.53,"endTime":2702.67,"body":"that's all we've got. Yeah."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2702.7,"endTime":2706.63,"body":"Oh, well. Oh yeah, your"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2702.7,"endTime":2706.63,"body":"boundaries. Yeah. But now we"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2706.63,"endTime":2709.72,"body":"need to talk about what's going"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2706.63,"endTime":2709.72,"body":"on in our life a little bit"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2709.72,"endTime":2712.33,"body":"a little bit. So we've,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2709.72,"endTime":2712.33,"body":"you know that most people don't"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2712.33,"endTime":2716.56,"body":"listen this late in the episode."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2712.33,"endTime":2716.56,"body":"Most people don't listen this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2716.56,"endTime":2718.45,"body":"late most people stop listening."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2716.56,"endTime":2718.45,"body":"So if you're still listening,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2718.45,"endTime":2722.38,"body":"thank you. Oh, you're saying"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2718.45,"endTime":2722.38,"body":"like what the time we've got"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2722.38,"endTime":2725.2,"body":"some merch going. And this is"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2722.38,"endTime":2725.2,"body":"kind of funny. So when we"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2725.2,"endTime":2728.23,"body":"started the merch thing, like I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2725.2,"endTime":2728.23,"body":"liked designing, I just kind of"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2728.23,"endTime":2730.96,"body":"enjoyed doing that. And I wanted"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2728.23,"endTime":2730.96,"body":"to make stuff for us. And then I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2730.96,"endTime":2732.64,"body":"was like, well, maybe other"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2730.96,"endTime":2732.64,"body":"people would want to wear this"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2732.64,"endTime":2736.57,"body":"stuff too. So on our website"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2732.64,"endTime":2736.57,"body":"under store, you can find some"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2736.57,"endTime":2738.82,"body":"of it if you want. If you want"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2736.57,"endTime":2738.82,"body":"to wear some of our stuff. I"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2738.82,"endTime":2740.83,"body":"think it'd be the coolest thing"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2738.82,"endTime":2740.83,"body":"ever someone to rip our merch,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2740.83,"endTime":2743.83,"body":"but it's out there. And there's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2740.83,"endTime":2743.83,"body":"more coming. We've got some more"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2743.83,"endTime":2745.06,"body":"done to today."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2746.02,"endTime":2748.75,"body":"Well, we're wearing them."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2746.02,"endTime":2748.75,"body":"Yeah, we're checking if you're"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2748.75,"endTime":2751.03,"body":"not watching us. We're gonna be"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2748.75,"endTime":2751.03,"body":"on YouTube."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2751.06,"endTime":2754.27,"body":"Yeah, check a real check"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2751.06,"endTime":2754.27,"body":"on YouTube. You'll see I think"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2754.27,"endTime":2755.98,"body":"it's kind of dope stuff. It's"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2754.27,"endTime":2755.98,"body":"fun to wear on the house. This"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2755.98,"endTime":2758.53,"body":"is what we record record and we"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2755.98,"endTime":2758.53,"body":"record in sweatshirts we chillin"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2758.53,"endTime":2760.24,"body":"sweatshirt. Yeah, we do even in"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2758.53,"endTime":2760.24,"body":"July."},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2760.27,"endTime":2762.79,"body":"Yeah, this is this is our"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2760.27,"endTime":2762.79,"body":"personality, this is what we"},{"speaker":"Paige","startTime":2762.79,"endTime":2763.42,"body":"are. Yeah, we"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2763.42,"endTime":2766.45,"body":"do not care. So check it"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2763.42,"endTime":2766.45,"body":"out, if you want. We mentioned"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2766.45,"endTime":2769.69,"body":"our community earlier in the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2766.45,"endTime":2769.69,"body":"episode, it is blossoming. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2769.69,"endTime":2774.13,"body":"we've got people in there who"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2769.69,"endTime":2774.13,"body":"are sharing the same struggles,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2774.31,"endTime":2777.01,"body":"and they're helping each other."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2774.31,"endTime":2777.01,"body":"And it is the coolest thing to"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2777.01,"endTime":2780.73,"body":"watch is to watch people help"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2777.01,"endTime":2780.73,"body":"one another through incredibly"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2780.73,"endTime":2783.31,"body":"difficult times who would have"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2780.73,"endTime":2783.31,"body":"otherwise not found each other"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2783.52,"endTime":2787.12,"body":"if they hadn't stumbled across a"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2783.52,"endTime":2787.12,"body":"video or a podcast episode. And"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2787.12,"endTime":2789.34,"body":"that is the greatest thing in"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2787.12,"endTime":2789.34,"body":"the world is like to know that"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2789.34,"endTime":2791.83,"body":"people are getting help because"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2789.34,"endTime":2791.83,"body":"of something we built. The"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2792.04,"endTime":2795.13,"body":"that's why we did this right. So"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2792.04,"endTime":2795.13,"body":"check out, check out the"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2795.13,"endTime":2797.53,"body":"community join up. If you're not"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2795.13,"endTime":2797.53,"body":"already in there, you can post"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2797.53,"endTime":2800.11,"body":"anonymously. If you don't want"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2797.53,"endTime":2800.11,"body":"to share any intimate details"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2800.11,"endTime":2801.97,"body":"about your life. I totally"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2800.11,"endTime":2801.97,"body":"understand that. And that's why"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2801.97,"endTime":2804.67,"body":"that feature exists. Or you can"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2801.97,"endTime":2804.67,"body":"reach out to us personally and"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2804.67,"endTime":2809.14,"body":"you can find all the information"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2804.67,"endTime":2809.14,"body":"on our website. www.tufo.com."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2810.07,"endTime":2813.58,"body":"Yeah, you can keep us there."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2810.07,"endTime":2813.58,"body":"It's got past episodes, guides,"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2813.58,"endTime":2818.08,"body":"you name it. It's all available."},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2813.58,"endTime":2818.08,"body":"That's it until next time, I am"},{"speaker":"Matt","startTime":2818.08,"endTime":2819.58,"body":"Matt and we'll see you"}]}