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The 10 Coffee Date Experiment That Changed Her Friendships with Alison Kinsey

Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually Takes

Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually Takes
The 10 Coffee Date Experiment That Changed Her Friendships with Alison Kinsey
Feb 26, 2026 Episode 166
Alex Alexander

She used to call herself the shy, awkward kid with one best friend. Now she calls community her superpower.

Last year, Alison Kinsey decided to run an experiment: invite 10 interesting people to coffee in one year. The result? New friendships and a complete shift in how she sees herself.

And you’d never guess it was a cross-country move to California that encouraged her to become an initiator. From afar, I’ve seen Alison start networking groups, go on blind double dates, host low-effort gatherings, and get deeply involved in her local community.

Alison is also one half of the Podcasting for Creatives team (and host of the podcast, Real Time Creator), who I have been working with since this podcast was just an idea.

 If you have been telling yourself “I’m too introverted” or “I’m just bad at this” —  that story is not permanent. If you keep showing up, you'll look back and realize you're not the same person anymore. 


In this episode you’ll hear about:

  • How Alison’s move to San Diego triggered her to become more intentional about her friendships, starting with connecting with the organizer of a Meetup group
  • How Alison used Instagram as a kind of “friendship dating app” to find and connect with people in her community
  • Real Time Creator, which documents Alison’s career break from being a high-earning breadwinner to taking a creative sabbatical
  • Alison’s challenge to have coffee with 10 new people over the course of a year, and her experience organizing low-stakes hangouts


Resources & Links

Find Alison on Instagram, LinkedIn, and her podcast Real Time Creator, which documents her layoff from tech and creative sabbatical. 

Learn more about my podcast editing team, Podcasting for Creatives.

Listen to Episode 12 about the Roots framework; Episode 14 about friend groups; Episode 44 about how making friends can help you with the big life choices;

This episode is sponsored by Slowly, a digital pen pal app used by over 10 million people worldwide. If you’ve been looking for a low-pressure way to connect with someone completely outside your normal friendship circle, this is it. Exchange letters at your own pace, no small talk panic required.

Download Slowly free and get 30% off Slowly Plus using my link: https://open.slowly.app/miXL/l8ei5iw6

WANT MORE?

My book, Are We Friends Yet? hits shelves June 16. Get on the waitlist for pre-order bonuses + a first look.

Dive into The Connection Reset. A 10-day private podcast to help you see the abundance of connection that already exists in your day-to-day (Yes. Really. I promise you have more than you realize). Start today.