Finding Your Balance in the Back-to-School Chaos

We need to focus not just on getting our kids ready for back-to-school season, but also ensuring we're taking care of ourselves as parents because without us there's no them, and without them there's no us.

• Take time to just breathe - whatever happens, it's going to be okay
• Create a plan for your school-year routine, but view times as guidelines, not rigid requirements
• Give yourself a gradual wake-up time instead of jumping out of bed
• Coffee and tea will be your best friend, but budget for it - create a small weekly "allowance" for emergency coffee runs
• Meal prep to avoid spending excessive money on takeout ($400/month at Starbucks adds up quickly)
• Pack your work bag the night before and put it in your car to avoid forgetting essentials
• Plan ahead for after-school care and make sure emergency contacts have all necessary information
• Create homework rules - establish a distraction-free environment with no homework in bedrooms
• For student athletes, break homework into daily segments rather than cramming on weekends
• Keep duplicate sports equipment and a spare bag in your car for forgotten items
• Use weekends wisely - do small tasks throughout the week rather than saving everything for Saturday and Sunday
• Take time for yourself, even if just a few hours - if you're not good, your kids can't be good

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Chapters

• 1:09 Parent Edition Introduction
• 3:49 Just Breathe and Plan
• 6:08 Coffee, Meal Prep, and Daily Routine
• 13:32 After School Care and Homework
• 18:31 Athletics and Weekend Self-Care
• 22:12 Closing Thoughts and Reminders

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:35

Hey guys, welcome back to another episode of the Gag is Pod. I'm your girl, charlie Shante. Thank you for joining me on another episode and I'm not even like, wait, today's not Friday. We getting an episode. Yes, we are getting an episode because I've been focusing on the kids and this is going to be like what I call a parent edition, because we need, we got to take time for us too. So, before we do that, if you're not already, please make sure you are following us on IG, at the gag is pot YouTube as well as the gag is pot, because after you listen to this, you can go watch it too, because you know kind of see what I didn't kind of see your girl, you know, um. And then if you want to do business, you know there's the email the gag is pod at gmailcom. So, like I always say, go ahead and grab whatever it is you eat, drink or whatever it is you do when you listen to this episode, so we can go ahead and jump into this episode. So I'm calling this my back to school parent edition because, like I said, I've been focusing on the kids a lot. We're making sure the kids are good and whatnot, but what about us. We got to take time for us. So before we jump all the way in, I do have another letter that I received that I'm going to read. It says Dear Family of Clarence Spencer and I'm going to change the name in here because the person's name's in here, so I'm going to change the name a little bit Dear Family of Clarence Spencer. My name is John Doe.

Speaker 1: 2:10

When scrolling across the Travis Manning Foundation website, I was looking through the Fallen Heroes section. That's when I came across the story of Clarence Spencer. Clarence was a humorous, loving leader who was dedicated to the army, freedom and even football. Yes, he loved his cowboys. I just wanted to thank your family so much for Clarence. He truly is an amazing inspiration giving up his life for the freedom of Iraqi citizens. Although I have never met him, I can confirm that just by reading his story. He was a wonderful leader. I will keep Clarence and your family in my prayers forever. Thanks for your time. Yes, I can confirm that he was a wonderful person too. Day he was a wonderful person too. So thank you for writing that letter. I greatly appreciate it. I love getting the letters and being able to read the letters, whether they be short, long or somewhere in between.

Speaker 1: 3:14

So now let's go ahead and jump into today's episode. So, like I said, I sat and I thought I'm like, hmm, what can I talk to my parents about? Because I'm always giving them the checklist for the kids. What about us? So I figured I'd do us a little short episode. You know something that'll help us remember. You know what it is.

Speaker 1: 3:34

We got to do Because without no us, there's no them, and without them, there's no us. Is we got to do because without no us, there's no them, and without them, there's no us. So we got to make sure that not only we're taking care of them, but we're taking care of ourselves as well. So my first thing is just breathe. Just breathe, because, whatever it is, it's going to be okay. All right, it's going to be okay, it's going to be good. Just breathe, all right.

Speaker 1: 4:05

In and out, a little motivation, meditation, you know, just a couple of breathing exercises. Um, just breathe, because, remember, if you plan to fail you, if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Now, this is not always the case, but I always say you got to have a plan for when you go into the new school year. And so, listen, we got a couple of bullet points for you. Just breathe and plan, plan, plan, plan and you can say, okay, well, if I plan, it may not go according to plan, you're right. But if you have a base, why am I tongue tied today? If you have a basis of what it is that you need to do, it makes it a little bit easier versus if you're free handing it. Forgive me if I start stumbling over my words and stuff. It's been a very long weekend and I spent over 12 hours in the sun at a swim meet for New Face, so I think I might have fried a few brain cells or something, because the heat indices have been over the 100s. But I digress. I will say this while you're breathing, coffee and tea will be your best friend. Ok, they're going to be your best friend because they're going to give you that little spark of energy and what you need to continue on with your day.

Speaker 1: 5:25

Me, yeah, I have what I call an allowance, a weekly allowance, and this allowance allows me, if I'm running late or I'm falling behind, I can grab myself coffee. I can grab myself a little something to eat on the way to work or if I'm going to get something to eat at work if I don't meal prep. That's what my like allowance is for. So I keep about $20 and you say, well, that don't seem like much. No, because I don't want it to. I don't want to have a big amount because I don't want it to become a habit. This is just something that you know. If my plan isn't coming together like I overslept or something like that, this is just my little emergency money that I can grab a coffee, grab a little something on the way because I'm going to plan. So, since I'm planning then because if I have a lot of money that I'd be like, oh, I ain't got to worry about meal prepping or I ain't got to worry about no food or nothing like that, because I have this emergency money and I have like $100 in emergency money for the week. So I just go get me a coffee or go get me a whatever. And it becomes an everyday habit. And I know this from experience.

Speaker 1: 6:32

There was one point in time where I was not meal prepping, I was not getting myself together and I had to go to work and I was going to Starbucks every day. And I want to say I was spending about three $400 at Starbucks and you probably like, oh, that's a lot, yeah. But when you think about it, the drinks at Starbucks are like between five and $8. So it adds up really, really quickly. 10 drinks that's $80 right there. Really really quick. Uh, 10 drinks, that's $80 right there if the drink costs $8. So you can see that it adds up pretty quickly. And not only was I getting something to drink, but I was getting something to eat as well, so it just added up. So I'm spending literally like $15 a day because I wasn't planning, I wasn't getting myself together. So by starting to meal prep and making coffee at home, that easily saved me about 30, 45 minutes out of my day. Because if you show up to whatever coffee shop you go to, the line could be long or they may not have something, or the traffic may be bad, and it just adds extra time into your day. And that's, we already ain't got enough time, so you don't want to do something that's going to add time to your day. While you're establishing your day-to-day routine, make sure that it is something feasible. I used to say you know, okay, at this time we're going to do this, at this time we're going to do that. Use those times as guidelines, not as dress right, dress Like.

Speaker 1: 8:06

My alarm is set every morning for 4.30. 4.30 is just my baseline, 4.30,. I am not sitting up in a bed like, oh yes, good morning, 4.30 is just a baseline of okay, it's time to wake up and it's time to start slowly arising. Because even though my alarm goes off at 4.30, I typically don't get out the bed just depending on what day it is, because my week looks different each week. For the most part it's pretty stable, but it sometimes look a little different. So my alarm goes off at four, 30 and I kinda that's kinda like my wake up, but I'm not woke up, if that makes sense, and I typically don't get up until around five, 15,.

Speaker 1: 8:49

But instead of just waking up and just jumping up and being cranky uh, it's it's kind of like how you do a kid. You just allowed them to just gradually wake up. So I give myself 45 minutes to just gradually wake up, and I know you'd be like dang, you ain't got to wake up that early. You can just sleep in a little later and then just wake up and get up. I could, but I don't want to do it like that, so I just give myself that 45 minutes to slowly awake. I don't turn any lights on, I don't get on my phone or anything like that. I just take that morning to just slowly wake up and just kind of slowly get myself together. Once you're up and you have yourself together, then you know, establish a routine of like am I going to go make lunches first? Am I going to wake up the kids first? What order am I going to do things in? You know, what do you feel like is going to work best for you? Do you have small kids? Do you have medium kids? Do you have older kids?

Speaker 1: 9:53

Everybody's day-to-day is going to look different. For example, my day to day when school has started looks like this I still get up at 4.30 and I'm typically out the door by 5.45, six o'clock. Just because the traffic changes Like now school in there I can leave the house at 6.30 and still get to work by seven. Now I have to allow time for buses, long lights, school zones and different stuff like that. So I get up at 4.30, shower about 5.15. Typically my food is already packed. So I spend about 10 minutes just grabbing stuff out the refrigerator and putting it in my lunch bag. And then right before I go downstairs to do that, I go wake up New Face because he has to be out the house by 7.10 to walk to the bus stop and so before I leave I just wake him up, kind of give him a nudge to make sure he's starting to wake up a little bit like that. I give him the same courtesy, wake him up about 545. That way he has until about 630 to just kind of slowly wake up. And then he gets up, takes his shower, grabs his breakfast he normally makes his breakfast on the spot grab his breakfast, get to the bus stop and get his day going. Bus stop and get his day going.

Speaker 1: 11:25

Now, if you have a child or children that require morning care or daycare, if they're really, really small, then make sure that you have their bags taken care of the night before. And I've even gotten in the habit of my work bag, because there have been many times where I've gotten to work and I don't have my work computer, I don't have my work folder, I don't have my password, but I don't have any of that. So the night before I pack all of that and then I put it in the car and then I go from there. That way, it alleviates me potentially forgetting it at home, forgetting my bag alleviates me potentially forgetting it at home, forgetting my bad, like I like listen. It didn't been sometimes where I've literally just showed up to work no badge, no work.

Speaker 1: 12:05

If you know nothing, I'm just at work on vibes because I ain't got nothing. And if I turn around and come home, I'm just gonna be at the house. I'm pto me because I ain't coming back. Okay, I'm just going to be out the door. So just sit down and look at what your day to day looks like. If your schedule is pretty consistent, then you know that's amazing, that's great. But if you're like me and you're like your remote days vary and stuff like that, your day to day may look different a couple of days out the week. However, if you have a baseline, stick with that baseline and it'll be easy to adjust if you have a different workflow this day versus if you have a different workflow the next day. Aren't y'all proud of me, like I got my notes over here, like um.

Speaker 1: 12:54

So my next talking point is after school care. Start deciding what you're going to do for after school care. Is your child a walker? Do they walk home? Are they going to be a car rider? Are they going to go to after school care? Is the after school care going to be at the school, or are you going to hire a bus service or like one of those after school programs to come pick up your child? Make sure you start deciding that now, please, please, please, like. Over these next couple of weeks and the first couple of weeks of school, you're going to have to pack your patience. You can plan all you want, but it's not going to go according to plan, because that's just the chaos of the first few weeks of school.

Speaker 1: 13:42

Make sure that while you're doing this, you are letting your emergency contacts know. While you're doing this, you are letting your emergency contacts know and you might say well, why Think about it like this. Say, for instance, you can't get there on time, and you call hey, nick, can you go pick up New Face, because I ain't going to be able to make it. Well, now is not the time to determine if Nicky is on the pickup list. Do Nicky even know where New Face go to take care of it? Or do Nikki know where New Face's after school care is? Probably not, but you want to make sure you take care of this, because they can somebody tell you oh, I know where that's it. Do you really know where it is? Because when you in that moment, time is of the essence, okay. And so just make sure that you kind of get in your ducats in a row, make sure the emergency contact has all the information they need If they either need to pick your child up from afterschool care or they need to drop them off. If there's any kind of secret password, anything like that, please make sure that they have it In addition to afterschool care.

Speaker 1: 14:54

What about homework? If your child is a walker and they walk home and they're a latchkey kid until you get home, what does that look like for homework in the afternoon? For us, homework looks a little different because nine times out of 10, most kids are going to have homework and then they're involved in some type of athletic. So you've got. You have got to find the balance. I hear so many times that kids are involved in athletics and they are literally doing their homework in the backseat of the car on the way to practice. Let me be the first to tell you I don't have no psychology degree, psychiatry degree. That is not healthy for your child.

Speaker 1: 15:36

I always make sure that New Face allots time for his homework these last few weeks of school. Before school starts I'm telling him get your little video gaming out, get your little phone play out, because when school starts it's going to be homework, homework, homework. I always provide he has to do it downstairs. He's not allowed to do it in his room. He's not allowed to do it upstairs. He has to do it downstairs at either the countertop or either at the table, no exceptions, no exceptions whatsoever. Has to be downstairs. Distraction free, no ifs, ands and buts about it. Then, whatever time he has to go to athletics. So right now his practice starts at 6 pm, he gets out of school at 3.50. So that kind of gives him about an hour, hour and a half to kind of work on his homework.

Speaker 1: 16:31

Um, one thing I do make him do is after he does his homework on the way to practice. I do. He can't have his phone, so he does read notes because it's a form of reading. He's not on his phone, um, he's not actively writing or anything like that. He's just like reviewing the notes that he's made. Nothing wrong with that. Like when I say kids shouldn't be doing homework. I'm like writing and like flipping pages and stuff like that. They should merely be reviewing notes, like just strictly like that. And then for if some reason he has a lot of homework and he didn't finish before swim, then he can do it when he gets home.

Speaker 1: 17:09

I meal prep the food. I typically meal prep the dinner. That way, when he gets home, all he has to do is take a shower, he just food up and then go back to that With him. His teachers give the deadlines. His homework is due on Sundays, so what he does is, instead of sitting doing it all in one serving, I will say, at one time, he breaks it up day by day, by day, so that on Saturdays and Sundays he's not playing like student Olympics. He just breaks it up day by day, by day by day. It makes it a little bit more manageable for him.

Speaker 1: 17:44

Athletics I always make sure that his bag is packed and I keep a spare bag in my car as well, because I know my child, you know your child, so I always keep a spare bag in a car that has everything it mimics his bag, just in case, like he gets to school and he'd be like mom, I forgot my bag and I'm like that's fine when I pick you up. I got my bag in the car, you ain't got to worry about it. Like we good, bro, like we good, make sure if you. If possible, just make sure that they have their bagpacks. They have everything I need and, like I said, I just mimic his stuff and I just keep a bag in the car. It just makes it easy for everybody, because I feel like I'd rather be over-prepared than under-prepared, simple as that, because if you're under-prepared, then you have to find time to stop at a store and grab something or something like that. No such thing as being over-prepared. Just keep extra stuff in your car and swap it out if you need to. You know what I'm saying. Put fresh towels in there for swim or whatever they sport they do. Keep a pair of shoes, whether it be just a pair of Bobo shoes or something like that, like a just-in-case pair, because you never know what is going to happen.

Speaker 1: 19:01

Parents, I cannot stress this enough the weekend is your best friend and I know you say, well, well, my child got sports on the weekend. Okay, my child does too. However, I do take the weekends for myself. It don't gotta be a lot of time. It ain't gotta be a whole day. Give yourself a few hours, take a nap.

Speaker 1: 19:25

What I do is I do a little, a few things during the week. I keep things straight during the week and then on Saturday by the time Saturday and Sunday come, I don't have this whole big old thing going on where I have to spend all day cleaning and doing laundry and different stuff like that. I do it little by little by little, because it's easier to eat a pizza slice by slice than to eat it all at one time, right? So I use that same philosophy when it comes to school and making my plan. Just do it a little bit at a time, that way, when I have the allotted time, it's not going to take me a long time because I kind of have everything. I've already put the pieces in place, shall you say. And, like I said, this is time to catch up on homework for kids, catch up on housework, laundry and get prepared for the next week. Saturday I use that day to kind of close out the previous week, and then Sunday is the start of the new week. That's when I get my grocery shopping done, that's when I get my meal prep and done and I get all of that stuff done. Yeah, so the weekend is your best friend, like this weekend.

Speaker 1: 20:34

When I tell you, I am beat down because New Face had a swim meet and it was. We had to get up at 4.30, drive 45 minutes. He had to be at warmups at 6.30 30. The heat indices have been over 100 for the past two days. He made it to finals yesterday, so that mean we had to come back at three o'clock for him to swim and we didn't get home till six o'clock. But today he um unfortunately didn't make finals. He was okay with that, so we actually got to come home, um about 11 30, which was cool, and you know it was still hot. So I didn't do any laundry today, unfortunately, I just laid around. So I'm going to have to play catch up on that this week and this weekend because there's no swim the end of the season. Today was the end of the season, so there is no swim for a couple. Today was the end of the season, so there's no swim for a couple. There's no meets for a little bit and there's no practice this week either. So going to be long.

Speaker 1: 21:47

It was just a parents while we're out here doing everything for our kids. Just make sure that we're taking care of ourselves, make sure we're hydrating, make sure we're getting enough sleep, because if we're not good, then our kids can't be good, and vice versa. You know, make you a plan. Regardless. If the plan goes, dress right, dress every day and it goes off without a hitch every day, that's okay. You have the plan, and a plan can be tweaked. It doesn't need to be perfect, but just set that baseline for what it is you need to do and, yeah, you'll be good to go. So, since this was just like a parent edition and kind of like a pop-up, there's no song lyric of the week. Yeah, so until next time, make sure you're following us on IG and YouTube at the Gag Is Pod. Please make sure you are liking, subscribing and rating. That way we can get out there to more audiences. And yeah, until next time. Bye, guys.