Laugh Lines and Legacy Planning: From Household Humor to Healthier Habits

Have you ever been chuckling over something as mundane as toilet paper placement? Oh, the joys of domestic life! It's Marcy here, and this Podcast episode is a rollercoaster ride through the hilarity of household quirks and the profound moments of family bonding. I'm unpacking the complexities of our daily lives, from the lighthearted debate over toilet paper orientation to the cherished memories made while scooting through Old Town Scottsdale with loved ones. These stories stitch the fabric of our lives, blending the everyday laughs with the treasured times that remind us to hold our family close.

But it's not all fun and scooters; we're also talking about something many of us shuffle to the bottom of the to-do list: end-of-life planning. I'll take you through the importance of a good laugh, even when discussing something as serious as our final farewell. Join me as I share poignant insights from my preparations, like the Dead Marcy notebook, which might inspire you to start penning your own. We'll discuss how to gracefully handle the details of funerals and the kindness of leaving clear instructions for those we'll someday leave behind. And guess what? Even this severe topic has a silver lining, as I sprinkle a bit of humor to lighten the mood.

In our last chapter, we zoom in on how lifestyle choices can sneakily fan the flames of inflammation in our bodies. I'm sharing my experiences with sleep aids and how kicking them to the curb did wonders for my sleep. We'll navigate through the signs of inflammation, from the pesky to the persistent, and how everything from our diet to our stress levels plays a role. It's all about giving our bodies the break they deserve. So pour yourself a drink—Diet Coke or otherwise—and let's explore how a few tweaks to our daily habits can pave the way to a healthier, happier you.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:04

Hello and welcome to the AG and A for SysSys Podcast. My name is Marcy Beggis and I am your host. Well, on today's podcast, we are going to go back to that happy topic of death and dying. We're going to revisit an old topic. We're going to revisit the Dead Marcy notebook. Just a little bit, not as thoroughly as I did it the first time. If you want it thoroughly, you can go back to my first episode and I walk through the Dead Marcy notebook. But we are going to reference the Dead Marcy notebook. We're going to talk about some other things, because I know we've talked about this before, but I guarantee you, over half of you, if not more, did nothing about it. So this, let's call this the reminder episode, the reminder that we all are going to die and we might as well be prepared. So sit back, relax, grab yourself something to drink and we are going to get started. Alrighty, well, let's get started.

Speaker 1: 1:17

So last week, my episode I recorded it in my nephew's house. I was in the bedroom in Arizona and when I came out from recording it later, my nephew said to me who are you yelling at on the phone? And I said I wasn't yelling at anybody, I was doing my podcast. So I hope my podcast last week didn't sound like I was yelling at you Never my intention, but nonetheless my nephew thought I was yelling at somebody on the phone, but I wasn't. I was just chatting with my friends, talking with you, and that's what we're going to do today. So I don't know about you guys, but in my house there's a silent war going on. It is literally a war. It is a silent war. There are no words being used, but there is a war and I want to know, I'm curious, if this happens in your house.

Speaker 1: 2:08

So we had our bathroom remodeled in December. I love it, it was beautiful, and we bought this beautiful towel holder for the towels. It was $400, but it's gorgeous, it's very simple, it's very beautiful, it's very heavy and it came with a matching toilet paper holder and the toilet paper holder. You can just slide the toilet paper on. There's none of that springy thing. I didn't want the springy thing. Those of you that know me, my hands are a disaster. I wanted no. That sounded very Chicago. I wanted no springs. I don't want to spring, load it and have it fling across the room. I just wanted to be able to slide my toilet paper on. Now.

Speaker 1: 2:53

We had a toilet paper holder like this in our house in Kota Dukasa, but the best part about that one was my dog, bonsai, could slide the toilet paper roll off and then he take it and tear it up when we were gone and one time this is a side note, by the way one time he had done it, thinking no one was home, and my daughter, kyle, was home and they met each other in the hallway and he just spit it out of his mouth. But my point is it's very easy to take the toilet paper on or off, but when I put the toilet paper on, I am an over toilet paper. As we all know, there's over or under and I'll come back in later and it'll be under and then I turn it to over and then it is under and then I turn it to over. It is the silent war happening in my house. I don't know if any of you have the silent war happening in your house. I have never said a word to Craig. Craig has never said a word to me, but we constantly, when we use the toilet paper, we flip it back the other way and it is just making me laugh because I think there's a lot of you out there that have the over under fight. If you're in a marriage that is toilet paper, happy congratulations to you.

Speaker 1: 4:07

I am in an unhappy toilet paper household, but the best part is, instead of having three bathrooms, I only have one. So now it's the best only one to clean, one to keep track of it's downsizing. I don't want any of you would be afraid of it. It is the best thing that's ever happened to me, this downsizing. I don't miss extra bathrooms. I don't miss anything. I don't miss the crap. I don't miss any of it. I love living small. We lived large way too long. One car, one bathroom, one kitchen, one bedroom it's all working for me. So, anyways, if you have the toilet paper war going on, email me at agingfastone at gmailcom. Again, agingfastone at gmailcom.

Speaker 1: 4:56

I'm curious how many of you have this silent war going on in your house? Or maybe you're the person that puts the toilet paper on all the time and the other person just doesn't care. But if they put it on, do they put it on different? They probably don't put it on. How many men just stick the stinkin' roll on the sink and don't even bother putting it on? That's what my son used to do drove me crazy. Anyways, I had a great week this week. I did my podcast last Thursday or Friday, so I hadn't had the weekend yet. Craig flew in on Friday and we had the weekend together in Arizona with my nephew and his kids and my niece Angie. We had a great time. I scheduled this. I recommend this highly.

Speaker 1: 5:40

Number one we took a tour of Old Town Scottsdale. But we didn't just take any tour. We took a writables tour and it's with a why R-Y-D-A-B-L-E-S writables. Look them up. They're hysterical, they're like these little writing stuffed animals, but they're for adults and they have a little thing that makes you go forward, something that makes you go backwards. Your top speed is eight miles per hour. They are safe, they are fun. We our group was 15 to 68. And everybody had a great time. It was a fun way to see Old Town Scottsdale and let me tell you I had no idea how beautiful Old Town Scottsdale is, how big Old Town Scottsdale is, how much of an art scene there is in Old Town Scottsdale. When we were done, we sat out on a patio in the sun and had some great Mexican food. It was just a delightful day and if you're ever in Scottsdale, I recommend this tour.

Speaker 1: 6:41

Writables, I'll put it up on my website, which is agingain'tforcissiespodcastcom. You can go there. I realized that I never got up last week's task list of things that you could start getting rid of. I will get that up there. I'm sorry I got busy and then traveling again I forgot. But I'll get that up this week and I also put up the link to the writables website because they have it in. They have it a lot of places. They have it in Mesa, arizona and Scottsdale. But Old Town Scottsdale is just gorgeous. There's no chains in there. If it's a coffee store, it is not a chain coffee store. It is just a really fun place to visit and it was a great way to do it. Recommended highly, especially if it's hot out and you don't wanna be traipsing all around. You get to ride these little scooter things that are just and they're comfortable and easy to ride. So that is my plug for writable scooters and for our great tour in Scottsdale. Let's see what else Flew.

Speaker 1: 7:50

Home had my insane week here of weather. They call it whiplash weather. Walking to the gym this week was warm. Most days I just had a sweatshirt on. I didn't even need my puffer coat. I didn't need anything until Friday night. We had 55 degree weather during the day and it snowed by five o'clock and it snowed a lot for being 50 in the day and that was crazy. And walking on slush and ice on my way to the gym on Saturday I was bundled to the hilt, had my earmuffs on. It was cold and windy. Today started out in the 20s and by the time we were done doing some stuff at church today it was 55. I'm telling you crazy, crazy, crazy town. And then Tuesday it is supposed to be 70, which is unheard of for February. We are on track to be the warmest February ever in Chicago and then by so get this Tuesday we're supposed to have thunderstorms coming through. Then the temperature's gonna drop like in a half an hour down to snow and it's supposed to snow all night. And again, I have a flight out on Wednesday, so pray for me.

Speaker 1: 9:08

I am flying to California. I am going to stay with my sister. I'm going to see my nephew and his wife that have been living in Europe and due to the pandemic and just life, we weren't able to get there and visit them. We had a trip planned and the pandemic squashed that particular trip. So I'm excited to see them. I'm excited to see my sister and her husband and spend time with them, and then I'm going from there to my best friend's house and I am going to a shower for her son, who's expecting their first baby. So I'm going to a baby shower.

Speaker 1: 9:41

I'm flying from a Wednesday to a Wednesday and since we've talked about retirement and income and I just kind of booked my trips and I don't really think about it, well, I don't have to go on a certain day anymore, I don't work anymore. So I pulled up the calendar for American Airlines and let me tell you you fly from a Wednesday to a Wednesday. I got round-trip airfare to LAX for 230 bucks, wret and my car there. And then my sister lives up in Camarillo, so I'm going to drive up the coast and see my old haunts and my beaches that I've of my youth and picture that young, willowy thing running through the sand who no longer exists. But yeah, I think that should be some fun. I'll let you know how that goes. I'm excited.

Speaker 1: 10:28

So next week I'll be coming to you from California. Well, I hope your week was good. I hope your weather wasn't as nuts as mine and let's see. We're going to be talking about death and dying again, but hopefully it's not too depressing. So, again, email me about your toilet paper wars, if you have them in your house. I'm kind of curious how many of us are fighting this very silent war. All right, sit back, refill that drink, angie, if you're drinking your diet Coke and you're driving in the car listening to me, I love you and thanks for your support all the time. Oh my gosh, death and dying. Here we go again.

Speaker 1: 11:17

And what made me think of this is our formation, our class, our adult Sunday school at church. He was talking about it. He was talking about the preparations and the things that you need to do and I thought you know we've talked about this on my podcast before, but I think it's worth revisiting because I guarantee you, most of you haven't done anything about it. So the last thing you want or maybe it isn't the last thing you want, I don't know you may want revenge on your family, but I don't think you want revenge on your family. I don't think you want your children or your siblings fighting over. Oh, my siblings wouldn't fight over what's happening to me at the end, but maybe yours would, or maybe yours would try to overtake your kids, or you know, families are weird. We all have weird families. So if you have a weird family and you thought you were alone, guess what you're not. We all have weirdo families.

Speaker 1: 12:12

I'm telling you, the thing is that death sucks. It just sucks in every situation, even when things go exactly the way somebody's lived a long time. If it's an unexpected death, it all just sucks. And why not prepare things when you're a good, sound mind and sound body to do it? You, you know, you just don't want something. If you are part of the LGBTQ community and you have a homophobic family, do you really want them planning your funeral? If you are estranged from parts of your family, like I'm estranged from my oldest child right now, I certainly don't want my oldest child planning my funeral and I don't want everything to fall on Alec. So it's funerals can go horribly wrong and they can go really right and from from you need to think about everything. So here's some of the things that I think you should know.

Speaker 1: 13:20

Ok, there should be paperwork to designate who will be in charge of decision making for your funeral and if that's all, your kids or your spouse or your best friend. Make sure that's written down so that there you don't want people to come to blows over this. You don't want a fight and, like I said, maybe you do, maybe you do and you're just willing to go out and go. You know what. You all work it out. I can. I can respect that and I can understand that If you don't have a spouse, your children, your siblings you don't want your siblings overrode, ruling your children. There has to be some sort of hierarchy. Paperwork is easy and it's super easy to do. You could just do it yourself and have it written down, if you don't have it already put into your Papers through the lawyers that have been drawn up. But make sure you have. You know who that person is going to be. And also you should have a backup for things. If, if something happens, if your children are unable to make, you've put them in charge of making your medical decisions while you're in the hospital, or if something goes wrong or your spouse and they're unable to do it, you should have our lawyer has us have a backup and I have a backup and you don't actually have to tell that backup through the backup or you can tell the backup through the backup, but you should have. You should have that In in in your plans.

Speaker 1: 14:59

Let's see what else am I going to say here. You want to consider your funeral options. You know what is it that you want? Do you want a funeral? Do you not want a funeral, do you? You know what do you want? I said I want a bunch of men in suits at my funeral say walking up to the casket saying we're going to miss your boss, so that people think I had something going on that I didn't. There's so many funny things you can do, but you know I love some of the things that I do. You know I love some of the things. You know having, you know, someone take the flowers off the top of the casket and tossing it into the crowd to see who's next. There's so many funny things that I've heard that just make me laugh. But in all reality, you want these decisions made. You want there's there's. People are going to be upset. Hopefully they're going to be sad. Leaving all of this to them is can be very overwhelming. So you want to have your funeral planned out. You want to pick the songs, the literature, whatever you want written or said, or who you want to speak. Don't leave it to chance. Have those things chosen.

Speaker 1: 16:14

I don't think I don't even know if I could tell Craig his favorite hymns or if Craig could tell me, but they're written down. My favorite hymn is Onward Christian Soldiers. I've loved it since I was a kid. I remember singing it when I went to a private school. There's something about that hymn that I just love and it's important to me and I want that hymn. If there's readings from the Bible, you want to make sure that that is there. If you want, if you're in the hospital and you want last rites which was something I learned about today aren't really last rites, but it's that opportunity to get anything off your chest or and to be there with your pastor or your priest or whoever your rabbi, whoever is your spiritual leader. Do you want them there? Do you that you want them to visit? So making sure you have that designated agent for planning your funeral before your die is going to make life easier for everyone.

Speaker 1: 17:19

At the most basic level, you need to answer one major question what do you want to happen to your body after you die? So if you do nothing else, you need to make your family aware I have. I want to be burnt to a crisp and I want them to do what I well, the one thing I want done with my ashes which I think I've shared on this before is I really would like them to be put in a fireworks that goes over Disneyland. Whether that can happen or not, I don't know. I still have to decide what I want them to do with my ashes, I think. I think I want them just thrown in the ocean. To be honest, I've always loved the ocean. As a kid it was my happy place. My family went to the beach every Sunday during the summer months and the good months, and we went to Will Rogers State Beach and I ate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Sitting on my towel Makes me a little weepy. That's what was my happy place as a kid. I could run free. No one told me what to do or how to do it. I felt safe and I felt happy in the sun, and it's still my happy place.

Speaker 1: 18:31

So again, make sure that you have these things. If you want to be buried at your church, if there's a column barium, you should talk to your church now about that. That was brought up at our meeting today. There's a few spaces left in our column barium and if that's something you're thinking you want, you better tell the church. Craig put in a column barium in our church in California and it's a good idea. There's only so many spaces so you might want to pay for that ahead of time and have that done.

Speaker 1: 19:01

I think I shared with you also that my mom prepaid for her funeral when she did my dad's. So I don't know if she got a deal or what, but mom paid for that, which was really nice and it made things easy. But one of the things she also paid for was late night pickup if she was to die in the hospital, which my mom did die in the hospital, and my sister will have to remind me, but I believe it was around nine o'clock at night, cindy, maybe between seven and nine my mom passed away and Cindy and I were with my mom and they asked if we wanted to stay with the body and we had been there and we had prayed over my mom, we had done all of that and we said no, we know where our mom is now and they said, well, hole in hole, which was the funeral home, will be here within the hour and Cindy and I thought that was kind of weird. I thought they just would place her in a refrigerator until the next day. So when we met with the funeral person, she said that mom had paid for the late night pickup, which till this day, makes me laugh. I guess she didn't want to be just hanging around in an old hospital. So, anyhow, I found that funny. But I also want to say that I found it very comforting that that was all paid for and my mom's decisions were already made.

Speaker 1: 20:15

One of the things I want you all to do right now turn off this podcast and go do it is pick out the picture you want people to use. Honestly, I've seen some really bad pictures of people who I cared about and loved on their little cards at the funerals. Make sure you pick out a good photo of yourself. Don't let them be using some terrible photo. So I do it. Also. Do you want your organs donated? Do you want to donate your body to science, do you? You know and that's something to think about I haven't really thought about that I have a very rare disorder. It's a genetic disorder. Maybe they need my body for science. I don't know. Maybe I'll have to think about that. That is something I seriously have to think about. See, this even works for me. But get all these decisions made. You never know when things are going to happen.

Speaker 1: 21:17

I think at 50 is a good age to do this. Anything happens before that, well, good luck everyone. But I think at 50, if you're 50 years old, this is an older. This is something you should really have done. This is something you should really think about. Sit down with your loved ones and tell them what your funeral wishes are. This is an if or an, and I don't really A lot of times that nobody wants to talk about it, and I don't blame them. I think, as long as you have it written down, you have your person that's going to be in charge of your funeral. A friend, family or spouse know that that's their job and where the paperwork is. I think, honestly, that's really all you need to do.

Speaker 1: 22:02

But do something. Do something. Make sure that there's money to plan for whatever it is you choose. If you want some fancy, fandangled thing, make sure that there's funding for that. Don't put that burden on your family. And if there isn't going to be money for it, make sure you choose something simple to be done. You know, look at what the options are.

Speaker 1: 22:28

Honestly, I would rather be if I was to be buried. There are now oh, I can't think of the word but there's cardboard caskets that break down in the dirt. I think that's amazing, these fancy things that go into the ground. Honestly, they're so expensive and they're really ugly in my opinion. So I would rather, if I was going to be buried, I would be buried in a cardboard box. I'll tell you that much. So make sure those things are done.

Speaker 1: 23:00

Remember that death is natural. There's nothing more but about discussing yours. You were all going to die. You don't get out of that. You don't get off this planet without dying. If you, if you haven't realized that I'm here to tell you you're not getting out of here. I understand that it's not a conversation about rainbows and unicorns and those kind of things, but make sure you have it. Find something that's going to help you walk through this. Get this done. I know we've talked about it before and I also know you didn't do it, so get on it and do it.

Speaker 1: 23:31

So let's talk about the Dead Marcy notebook. The Dead Marcy notebook is something I came up with and if you email me at agingfastone at gmailcom agingfast, the number one at gmailcom I'll email you a word document or a fillable document for it. I named it the Just in Case notebook instead of the Dead Marcy notebook for you, but you can name yours anything. Now I love that it's the Dead Marcy notebook. It's a form, or it's a great fillable form that has your personal information, financial information, all the things that your spouse or family are going to need If you die. Insurance information do you have life insurance? Do you have several little life insurance policies around that you've bought or you've held on to from different jobs? How's your family going to even know that If you don't keep really excellent paperwork? So this notebook is to keep everything in one place your home, your auto insurance because if both your parents, if you're both gone, your kids are going to have to sell your car. They're going to need the title to your car. They're going to need to cancel the insurance. Your retirement info Do you have accounts that your kids need to know about? What are the past? And passwords, your passwords to get into all of this, so that they don't have to go and prove who they are. They don't need to get a hold of this book and tell your dad Okay, so don't worry about them stealing your money, but the Dead Marcy notebook is something that how to.

Speaker 1: 25:05

There's a section for how to, so how to work things around the house If one of you or the other takes care of everything. That's kind of how I came up with that section when Craig and I had our own home. I knew how to work the sprinklers, I knew where the timers were, I knew how everything happened and he did not. If I was to die and the sprinklers didn't go off, he probably wouldn't even notice. Oh, I'm looking at the full moon out. It's beautiful. Maybe it's not quite full tonight I think it was full last night but it's stunning anyways. Over the city of Chicago, I digress.

Speaker 1: 25:38

And then there's a space for tradespeople. So if you have an electrician, you have your favorite plumber, you have all those things. Put it in there. Because if the kids need to sell the house and they need to do some things to fix it up, wouldn't you like them to know who your favorite tradespeople are? Who works on your car? Who you know? Where do you take your car? Where do you get the lawnmower you know handled, what ever. That is Do you have a gardener? Who's your gardener? You know, if you're going to sell the house, you need to tell the gardener. Well, if you don't know who the gardener is, how do you tell him? Do you know what days he comes? All those things seem ridiculous, but if you get the just in case notebook, the Dead Marcy notebook, and you fill those things in, it's going to make it a lot easier for your loved ones.

Speaker 1: 26:26

So with that I'm going to leave you and we are going to have a senior moment. But occasionally I'm going to go back to subjects and remind you because I think we need reminders that these things are important. So we're making some changes in our things. We're meeting with our lawyer Get on it, people. Times of wasting and, like I said, we're all not getting off this planet alive. So sit back and we will talk about I'll see you in a moment, ok, so our senior moment today is inflammation triggers. I'm going to talk about seven inflammation triggers. So if you're of a certain age, inflammation can be a problem. And I just want you to be aware. I got this from AARP. You know I love getting information from them.

Speaker 1: 27:27

So, smoking, if you are still smoking and I know a few smokers smoking is the biggest risk factor for inflammation. So if you don't have any other reasons to quit smoking, if you have chronic back pain, if you have muscle aches and joint aches from inflammation, if you didn't think about it, your smoking is causing that pollution. So pollution, dust, sandstone, concrete. So if you're living let's say you're living in an area that's doing a lot of construction, if you're in a new home area, you may you may find that your body is more achy from inflammation. Ok, this is one chronic stress. Stress has its own effect on inflammation. It never lets the body heal. If you are chronically stressed, if you are unable to relax, you are putting your body in a state that just allows inflammation to run rampant.

Speaker 1: 28:29

So you ask me, what are? We'll go back to that poor sleep, inflammation it hurts your immune system and inflammation. So poor sleep if you're not getting good sleep. You know it's really funny. For years I have taken like because Craig is a long story, but Craig snores and he refuses to do anything about it and that's my own problem. But I've been taking, like melatonin, a CBC. I've been taking Tylenol PM for years. Well, this week I decided to stop taking it all, I'm sleeping better. Just putting it out there, I know this stuff. I can't even tell you Americans how much we use sleep aids. Well, I thought, well, what happens if I stop taking it? I am sleeping much better. So there's that. So poor sleep, so I'm getting better sleep, so that it's not great.

Speaker 1: 29:29

Excessive alcohol so if you drink excessively and you know a couple drinks a day is excessive, normal drinkers don't do that so just obesity and processed foods. So if any of those things fall into you, that could be your inflammation. So let's talk about what symptoms of inflammation? Inflammation, so acute inflammation, pain or tenderness, swelling, heat, flesh, skin at the side of an injury so that's acute inflammation. Chronic inflammation can be a domitable, a domitable the domitable snowman, a domitable abdominal pain, chest pain, fatigue, insomnia, fever, mouse or joint pain or stiffness. So I don't know anybody that doesn't have a little bit of that. Skin rash, depression or anxiety, diarrhea, constipation, acid reflux, weight gain or loss and frequent infections. These can be signs of chronic inflammation. So if you're doing any of the seven things that I talked about and you feel like you have chronic inflammation, stop it. I know it's not that easy, but give your body a break. Well, we come to the end of another episode. Remember what I always say AG Need for SISSYS.