Hoorf! Radical Care in a Late-Capitalist Heckscape

Able: the Piano Recital; interrogating virtuosity with concert pianist Jaci Rasmussen

• Elle Billing • Season 4 • Episode 2

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Elle hosts Jaci Rasmussen, a pianist and educator living with lupus. Jaci discusses the piano suite project "Able" with composer Elijah Culp. Jaci emphasizes the importance of redefining success and virtuosity in the context of disability. She also highlights her journey with Alexander Technique and the benefits of slowing down and adapting to her body's needs.

Links to Jaci’s work, as well as all other resource links, are **in the full show notes at hoorfpodcast.com

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Elle Billing:

Hi. My name is Elle Billing. I am a chronically ill queer femme, and I'm tired. I'm here this episode and every episode to dig at the roots of our collective fatigue, explore ways to direct our care in compassionate and sustainable ways, and to harness creative expression to heal ourselves and to heal our world. Welcome to Hoorf: radical care in the late capitalist heckscape, my guest for this episode is Jaci Rasmussen. Jaci Rasmussen is a pianist, educator and arts advocate. She has performed across the United States in numerous solo recitals, master classes and festivals, studying with renowned pianists from across the globe. A passionate collaborator, she is currently the collaborator on the piano suite project Able with composer Elijah Culp, which interrogates the relationship between notions of disability, ability, and virtuosity, reimagining a more inclusive notion of each subject. As an artist living with lupus (systemic lupus, erythematosis) through this project, she navigates these concepts in the lens of her own journey with this chronic illness. I'm excited to have Jaci with me on the podcast today. Welcome. Hi Jackie. Welcome to Hoorf.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Hi Elle. Thanks for having me. Oh, I'm so excited.

Elle Billing:

Yeah, it's been a while since we've seen each other.

Jaci Rasmussen:

It's been a long while. Yeah.

Elle Billing:

LIfe has taken us to very different places,

Jaci Rasmussen:

all over the place, yeah?

Elle Billing:

So, yeah, you're in Indiana and I'm in North Dakota, but we both used to be in in Idaho, so, but you've been a few places since then. So, and we'll and we'll probably get to that, but,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yeah,

Elle Billing:

it's, it's nice to see you.

Jaci Rasmussen:

I'm excited. Yeah, it's so nice to see you.

Elle Billing:

Excuse me for a second. I need a little water.

Jaci Rasmussen:

No, you're good. I need a beverage too,

Elle Billing:

in your piano mug. It's so cute.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Thank you. Yeah, my teacher got this for me. So, yeah,

Elle Billing:

sometimes when I'm, if I'm drinking coffee while I'm recording, I have my Hoorf mug.

Jaci Rasmussen:

I love that little branding moment.

Elle Billing:

Yeah, it is. No one else sees it because we don't save the video, but it's, it's just like, good vibes,

Jaci Rasmussen:

exactly, good vibes in the, in like that,"Yeah, we're doing this"

Elle Billing:

Getting in the spirit, yeah. So I'll just start, and then we'll get going. And so I'm wondering, how have you received care this week?

Jaci Rasmussen:

I've thought about this. I feel like I've received a lot of care in a lot of different ways this week. But like, when I first saw that question, my first thought went to the fact, like, now the school year, quote, unquote, has started. Like, as a piano teacher, I work mainly around the school year, just educators in general, and I also had some other gigs starting up. Like, I just started a new ballet accompaniment job, which has been really fun.

Elle Billing:

Oh, cool.

Jaci Rasmussen:

And then, yeah, I started teaching. So like, now it's been from, like, calm of summer to much longer days, and by the time I get home, it's later and I'm like, I don't want to cook, like, I just, I just want to, like, get horizontal on the couch for a minute. And my partner, Peter, has been cooking a lot of nights now. So like, every time I come home, it like smells like whatever amazing food he's cooking, like my dog George comes to greet me. Dinner's ready, the show's queued up. Like, that's been the care I've received. It's just like a warm hug coming home. So

Elle Billing:

that's lovely,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yeah, that's been great,

Elle Billing:

That's nice.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yeah.

Elle Billing:

That makes me feel warm and cozy.

Jaci Rasmussen:

I know, right? Like you open the door and it's like the cartoon waft of, like, you know, the whatever chicken or whatever is cooking it? Yeah, it's been great. So very grateful for my partner. Very caring.

Elle Billing:

Is Peter teaching too?

Jaci Rasmussen:

He is full time video editing now. So,

Elle Billing:

okay. Oh, that's different.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yeah,

Elle Billing:

nice. Okay, cool. Just as some background before we get into some of the other stuff, you have lupus,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yes,

Elle Billing:

yeah, and you were diagnosed when you were 18,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yes, 17, just about to turn 18, you were there. I remember you were there for all of that. Like,

Elle Billing:

I was

Jaci Rasmussen:

You saw all of that go down. So

Elle Billing:

that was intense.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yeah, yeah, it was

Elle Billing:

so, how does, how does lupus impact your life and create, like, access barriers for you? Like, how does lupus disable you?

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yeah, it's lupus is so. Interesting, because it's so individual, like, it's, it's, there's so many types of lupus. Every person is so different. And like, how their symptoms, or whatever is going on internally, like, it just presents so differently for everyone. So like, for me, back when I was diagnosed, and like, I'm sure you remember some of this. Like, I had plans to go abroad the next year. I was going to do, like, a foreign exchange. I had, like, I'm one of those people. Like, I'm very type A, as they call it. I don't know if that's like, even a true thing anymore, but I like to plan things out, like, way in advance. And like, like, Yes, I know what I'm doing, I'm ambitious about it, like, this is how it's gonna be. And then lupus came in and just like, Nope, that's not how life's gonna be. So in terms of just how it's created barriers, like when I was first diagnosed, it just I had the physical limitations of, like, starting these new, new medications, having to rest more, having to, you know, pull back from just things in the everyday life, like, really, really, really care for myself, especially like after I was hospitalized for about a week and, like, just recovering. But then it was also the the mental and emotional care of, like, just grieving, I think what I lost at the time, and then grieving what I thought my life was going to look like. And I think that, like, I've heard that experience from many other people who become disabled, like, you know, in their teenage years or adulthood, but really any point in life. And so, yeah, I redirected. I stayed in Idaho for a bit longer. It all worked out, because then it I came back around to music. I don't know if that would have happened otherwise, and I'm really glad that happened. And changed my major to music while at CSI, at our local junior college, and then as I continue to recover, like, I'm happy to say I went into remission for several years. So for the most, most part, like, normal life, I feel like that doesn't normal, doesn't exist, but like, it was a normal, quote, unquote, life for a while. And like, I was really, like, I had a lot of energy. I was able to do most things I wanted. And then I moved to LA to study and finish out my undergrad studies. That was an amazing adventure. I was there for five years, and then I came out here to Indiana for my masters. And yeah, everything was going, you know, I was doing my thing. I was being a pianist, studying piano, trying to finish up school, and I didn't manage my stress very well. That's something music students are not great at. We are not we are not good at caring for ourselves at a general level, although that's changing. But last October, I started having pain in my hands again, and I thought it was overuse, because I was playing really long hours, like I was playing, I was accompanying singers and other people and doing my daily practice, which for classical pianist, that's most often, like several hours a day, like it's, it's a rigorous schedule. So I thought, Oh, I'm just, I've been playing too much, so like, I canceled rehearsals for the rest of that day. And like, you know, I stretched, I did my things, and then it just kept getting worse. And then other symptoms started popping up. And I'm like, Hmm, this is, like, new but it's not. And then I went to go see my doctor, and then it was, turned out it was a flare up, because at that point I was on a really low dose of meds, you know, being in remission, and then it was just this continual, very like, months long flare up. And it was, like, it sucked pretty hard. And I even thought about, like, quitting my last semester, or taking, like, a semester off because it was just so hard. So, yeah, it's that that was, that's been a challenge. But glad to say, recent months I've been doing much better. Like, I'm about to come off of one of my meds, yay.

Elle Billing:

yay!

Jaci Rasmussen:

That's always, like a little victory. I've been back in the gym, which is, like, a huge victory. Like, I'm like, Yay! I could, like, lift things and not, you know, crumple in pain the next day. Like, that's great,

Elle Billing:

or over stress your body. Yeah.

Jaci Rasmussen:

exactly, yeah. So that's been great. Like, I've been able to do more things, but, yeah, just on the school things. Like, I just operate at a different daily level than a lot of my colleagues, and I've also had to, like, delay my graduate recital because of it, and that's fine. That's also, like, a normal thing in grad school. They're like, yeah, life happens. You're in grad school, there's a different stage of life, like, do what you need to do, but it's like, on the it, there's like, the daily things, and then there's a long-term things. There's the daily things of like, oh, yeah, I can't just, like, hang out in the sun on the beach with my friends, you know, like, because that triggers lupus, you know, flare ups like, UV isn't good for lupus. And then there's, like, the long term things of like, okay, what can I do, like, career wise, with my music that's not gonna, like, immediately, you know, destroy my body. So, yeah, those are some ways.

Elle Billing:

I remember when you were first diagnosed, and you were talking about managing your stress, and I remember you having to cancel your study abroad, and I remember you had been learning Mandarin.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yeah, I was, I was pretty intense about it. I'm just an intense person, but I was pretty intense about it.

Elle Billing:

So, yeah, well, I mean, and that's why, probably why we got along, because we're both, like, super intense about whatever it is that we're pursuing. And--

Jaci Rasmussen:

I think that's a creative thing. I think that's just like a lot of creative folks in general, as we're just, like--

Elle Billing:

we like, info dump on whatever it is that we're doing. Like, Hey, you want to hear about this cool thing that I'm doing? Yes, yes. I do

Jaci Rasmussen:

Exactly. Yeah.

Elle Billing:

So what can you share about your experience about, like, the nexus, that intersection of disability and creative life? So, like, how those two parts of your life and identity influence each other?

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yeah I've been thinking about this a lot, especially with this recent flare up. Because, again, like, I think for so many what is that being in remission for almost, like 10 years, I kind of, I wouldn't say I was living like an able bodied experience, but in some ways it was, some ways it wasn't like lupus wasn't as present in my life. Even though, you know, I was on medications, I was still going to see my doctor. But I think over those years, and I think just, I'll say it now, like classical music world, they're making progress, still very ableist philosophies that float around in literally centuries of those mindsets. So I think it's hard not to internalize some of those. And this recent flare has, like, really kind of set me on this whole deconstruction of these notions, and just also past burnout, just in general, and like past struggles I've had, like being, how do I say it? I've also gotten a lot more passionate about, like, accessibility and equity in classical music. Like, that's, that's kind of a big career thing of mine. Like, I'm very passionate about that because of experiences I've had, you know, in all different places, but in teaching especially. But, yeah, I've been kind of deconstructing these things. So, like, what does success mean? Like, what does that actually mean? Is it, okay, as a pianist, like touring the world? Okay? But if you don't do that, what does that mean? Is teaching still success? Is working a non music job, but still having music be part of your life, that could also be success. Like thinking through these things I've been thinking through, like the sick or overworked artist trope, and that's like, its own discussion. Like--

Elle Billing:

oh my gosh, yes,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yes, yes. Like, it's, it's, I feel like there again, there's progress being made. But like, those concepts are just so persistent, like, I still see it in conversations, just in my classes, like, at least in the classical piano world, like, let's take the composer, Frederick Chopin, like, very famous composer. He, I think he died of tuberculosis, like many of his time, but he was very sick. And, yeah, he was, he was disabled, especially the last part of his life. And it's glorified in a really gross way, and of like, Oh, his suffering, that's why the music is so good. I'm like, let's talk about that. What does that mean?

Elle Billing:

Like, right? Yeah, there's the I don't know if you're familiar with the comedian Hannah Gadsby.

Jaci Rasmussen:

I'm not

Elle Billing:

but in one of in one of Hannah's stand up bits, they talk about-- Hannah has a degree in art history and lives with mental illness, and how after one of their shows, somebody came up to them and was like, Well, you know if, if Van Gogh hadn't been mentally ill, we wouldn't have had the sunflowers or Starry Night, and Hannah's like, We don't owe you our suffering.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yes. Like, oh my gosh, yes, but yeah.

Elle Billing:

But also, the reason we have Starry Night is because Van Gogh was over medicated, and one of the medications, and that what they were giving Van Gogh the asylum. Like, made-- like causes you to see yellow and like, fractalized like, but also, we don't owe you our suffering. Like, you don't get to consume it.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yes, yes. And like, oh my gosh, yeah. I literally I have on my bookshelf, like a biography of Van Gogh, and I remember, like, starting even just the first chapter. I'm like, How is this? Like reflecting his legacy? Like, I wonder what he would think about this, you know, and, yeah, and like, I'm gonna get real piano nerdy for a second. So like--

Elle Billing:

please do!

Jaci Rasmussen:

a perfect-- So a great example of this. Like, we talked about this in my piano literature classes. So Robert Schumann probably like, my favorite, one of my favorite composers for piano, if not my favorite right now, he, it's, it's been, I don't want to say assumed, or it's, it's been like, by historians, they think he might have been bipolar or schizophrenic, or both, like they assumed he struggled with that because of journals they've read over time. He kept lots of diaries and journals and letters to his wife, who was also a composer, and late in his life, the last few years of his life, he was institutionalized, which, back then, like, horrible, right? Like, this is like the late 1800s so yeah, but they're in a lot of his letters and on a lot of his music. He's designated different, two different characters called Eusebius and Florestan. One is like, like a thoughtful, introspective character, and another one is more like playful, unpredictable and like, in one way, like it's, it can be a quote, unquote helpful tool to know, like, musically, like how you interpret something, or how you put together a piece, but at the same time, like it's, again, this glorification of, like, maybe, maybe he was struggling with these mental health issues and like that wasn't the way that's been documented by historians and the way we continue to perpetuate these same stories, like, maybe. And again, this isn't, this isn't for us to consume. This isn't for our pleasure, like that. So that's something I've been like, racking my brain around. But, and musicologists can probably speak more to that. But again, like, it's like, okay, what story are we telling so, yeah.

Elle Billing:

How can we honor his experience without commodifying it and

Jaci Rasmussen:

Exactly, exactly, yeah, yeah. I forgot what else I was gonna say. Yeah. I went on. I went on my little, like, nerdy piano.

Elle Billing:

That's great.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yeah, yeah. Another nexus of, like, disability and the creative life, I think, with this recent flare up, like, kind of re accepting lupus into my life, which has been an interesting experience, like, it's opened other doors I didn't expect, like, I got really into a practice called Alexander technique. It's like a physical approach. I don't know if you've heard of it. It's really popular among musicians, but like, athletes, dancers, other people use it and but more than anything, what I've learned is just a practice for everyday life. It's a lot about, like, how do you use your body in ways that are helpful to you? And like, where you're at in this very present moment, and that's been, like, amazing. So I'm really lucky to have those resources here at IU, and I have a really awesome teacher who's also, like, very affirming and very accepting and open to different disabled experiences. Like, we've had lots of great conversations about, like, my recent experiences and like, I would have, kind of, like, lessons or sessions of, like, practicing this, and it would be in the mornings. And mornings are always worse for lupus. Like, you wake up and everything's, like, especially in a bad flare, everything's swollen and, like, stiff and just like, you feel gross and painful, and, yeah, it kind of just was like a practice of, it met me and accepted me every moment of where I was at at any time, including the worst, including the best. And that's been like something I've been taking into my creative life. Of like, How can I do that for whatever I create? How can I do that just in my general life, like, on a, what I call, like, a low spoons day, or a high spoons day, you know? So that's also been really great.

Elle Billing:

That's good I've been doing. I call it Slow-ga,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yes, I love that Slow-ga. I love that.

Elle Billing:

Yeah, it's, I can only do about 10 minutes of that anyway. Yeah, it's, it's very slow, and I only do a few poses, and only do it a couple times a week. Like, I can't do it every day. I can't even call it a yoga practice by most people's standards. But it's, it's just enough to, like, get me in my body and working with it, like, in the same way that you're talking about, like, right now, this present moment. What can I do? How can I

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yeah

Elle Billing:

and, like, accepting where I am,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yeah, yeah, there's, there's something Alexander Technique is, like, very adjacent to yoga too, which is, like, cool to hear. But. There's something like the one thing I'm able to do every day, no matter what, it's called active rest, you literally just lay on the floor, like you might have a book or two under your head to help with alignment. You can put your feet up that helps with your lower back. Like you can have your feet flat on the ground, or you could just lay flat and you just give your body directions to like, Okay, what would feel good right now, maybe I can think about, you know, lengthening through my neck or releasing my hip muscles and like, that's all you have to do. And it's also like, you can invite your body to do this. You don't have to force it. Don't force it. Just like, just let what happens happens. And it's that's like an exercise. No matter where I'm at every morning, it helps and I'm able to do it. So it's been that's like my version of Slow-ga. So

Elle Billing:

yeah, floor time. I think, is what I call it.

Jaci Rasmussen:

floor time. Floor time.

Elle Billing:

"Time for some floor time," and my mom will be like, "are you okay?" I'm like,"yep.--

Jaci Rasmussen:

This is great,

Elle Billing:

"It's just floor time."

Jaci Rasmussen:

This is-- what is it? Somebody, somebody in like, Alexander Technique, they called it like a drink for your spine, which we kind of like giggled about it in class. But we're like it so is because it's like releasing that pressure. So anyway, I love it. Love slow-ga. I'm calling it slow-ga now. I'm gonna, I'm gonna adapt that for mine.

Elle Billing:

Yeah, I think on my Facebook profile I said, I say that I'm an aspiring sloth. So,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yes, yes,

Elle Billing:

because a sloth is perfectly adapted to its environment. Like I'm going the pace that I need to

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yes,

Elle Billing:

I'm not slow. I mean, I am, but it's okay,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yes, yes. It's like, Oh, my God,

Elle Billing:

going fast would make me sick.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Exactly, you're like, it would do more harm than good. It's like, the, I kind of think a lot about the slow life trend, you know, like, in the fact that it's trending, I don't know.

Elle Billing:

Yeah

Jaci Rasmussen:

I have lots of thoughts about that, but it's also like, you're on to it because it's good for us. Slow down.

Elle Billing:

Yes

Jaci Rasmussen:

capitalism tells us not to, but you should, because it's really good for you. And like, don't. Capitalism will not cease. Like, it's--

Elle Billing:

but the fact that capitalism has latched on to the slow life,

Jaci Rasmussen:

I know, and it's so ironic, and I'm like,

Elle Billing:

Oh my gosh. It's like, oh, they'll do, they'll commodify everything.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Literally, they'll, they'll package it and sell it on Amazon. Like, yeah, it's, I think about it a lot. I think it about a lot these days.

Elle Billing:

Yeah, yeah, yep. Okay. So speaking of like your senior recital and or your grad recital and all of the thinking of disability and piano and things you and a another, another colleague, composed a piece called Able.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yes

Elle Billing:

Yes. So I just, I want to hear all about Able. Whatever you want to tell us about the composition and the recital, and why it was important to you, what it was, tell us all about it.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yes. Thanks for asking. So it's like, so it's actually a piece in progress. There's like one, okay, it's like a four part piano suite, so there's like four movements, and then we've already premiered the first movement. So it's with my friend and colleague, Elijah Cole. He's a composition master student here at IU and yeah, it's a suite where every performer in their own body and their own creative experience can express the concept of virtuosity and what it means to them. And it all came about because of a yearly project I'm part of. It's for, like, new music. Pianist gets paired with a composer. They work on creating, like, a short piece together, and then we premiere it in this big, long recital. There's like 24 pianists that play. It's like this, like, hour and a half, two hour long concert, and it's really cool. And this was the concert was, I think, in March. And so you get ready, like, a few months in advance, you get paired with someone, and you start working on the piece together. And, like, it's mainly a lot of the composer says, Hey, I have this idea. Brings it to the pianist. They try something. Say, here's my idea for this. Or I can't play this physically, or, like, this is impossible, and that's part of the learning experience. It's really good for composers and it's really good for pianists. So yeah, and it's something I love doing. I love working with composers. So anyway, the prep kind of started happening in, like, December, January, and that was, like, the very worst of my flare up. Like, that's when, like, I was many days, I was just in bed all day. I had to call out on a lot of things. It was just really rough. And I knew that was on the horizon. I knew I just got paired and I, we'd have to start on this project. And I'm thinking, oh my gosh, can I do this? Like, is this? Am I going to have to back out? And I said, You know what, I'm going to take the chance and just, like, let them know what's going on, let them know what I can and can't do, and then just go from there, and then just see what happens, so and just be honest about what's going on. And at this point, again, I had been in remission for like, nine, ten, years like and it was, it's very hard for me to be open about lupus in environments like that, because again, of the ableism like you worry about, am I going to lose opportunities when people find out I'm disabled all those horrible things, right? And so anyway, it felt like kind of a leap of faith for me. So we, yeah, we met on Zoom for the first time, and, like, we he just asked if I had any ideas, and I was like, here's the deal, here's my condition, here's what I've been dealing with. And I thought I told him, I was like, it might even be like a fun idea to explore, you know, something adapted to what I'm going through right now. And he just kind of paused for a minute, and just like, was thinking to himself, and I was like, Oh my, You know, my mind's racing. I'm like, Oh my gosh. Like, is he gonna ask for another pianist? Like, what's gonna happen? And he just came back and said, like, I'm really glad you shared, because I actually have a form of cerebral palsy. And, like, I don't get to tell people, very many people about this, you know, very often. And he's like, it affects how I play. It affects my music making. And then so we started talking about, like, music making as disabled artists, and just all the different facets of that. And that's kind of how this all came to be. So

Elle Billing:

wow

Jaci Rasmussen:

yeah, it was a pretty powerful moment. So yeah, so now we worked on the first movement of it, called Flare Up, and it just that's been encapsulating, like my experience in that moment. And then I think, April, May, we started a Kickstarter to, like, really get this whole project going so we could premiere it. We're planning to premiere it this coming January. We hope to invite other artists and creatives into part of that project. And then also, like, we started a bi weekly newsletter for some of our supporters to, like, show them the process, our thinking, our experiences, and then, yeah, really make this a whole thing, like a whole thing. And we're glad to say the Kickstarter was successful, so yay, but, um, but, yeah, it's been like, it's been kind of trippy for me, because, like, for so long, I felt like I kind of, I kind of masked my lupus. I didn't tell people about it out of fear of, you know, losing opportunities. And now, now, as I decide to be open about it. It's actually created more community. And I've had, I don't even know how many people reach out who have found out about the project and say, This is amazing. Here's been my experience, and I feel like I haven't been able to talk about it with people. So it's been, it's been pretty awesome for Elijah, and I like, it's been awesome, and we're excited for the next steps. So

Elle Billing:

that's really great.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Thanks.

Elle Billing:

So you, you said that the way that it's composed is that every performer, or any performer would could. What was the thing you said about virtuosity? I don't want to say it wrong.

Jaci Rasmussen:

No, that's okay. We we define, we define our own virtuosity, like, what that actually means to us. So, like, so, like, in the piano world, when we think of like an amazing pianist, like, what do we usually think of a virtuoso? Right? Yeah, fast hands, big, loud chords. Like, big, bombastic, really, physically demanding things. But on the other hand, pianists, we all we also know some of the hardest things to do are also like, the quiet things, like all the little details. So like, virtuosity is so subjective, and we wanted to take that to where the ableist notions of like, let's say there's a disabled pianist who isn't able to do like, you know, these fast running notes. What does virtuosity look like for them? Maybe they have a different ear for creating like, a certain color in like, the base section here that maybe other people aren't, aren't as attuned to. That's their virtuosity, that's where they're drawing from. So like, instead of taking like our physical or mental or emotional limitations, whatever they may be, whatever that looks like for us, like we're actually using that as inspiration. So okay, and another thing, like, we're being careful with, is not to like brush broad strokes in the same thing of like, not being ableist, like we're centering it in our experiences. So like, a lot of our process has been, Elijah says it's hard for me to do this thing with my left hand because my cerebral palsy. So like, let's work with that. Or for me, it's like, how can I use like, my arm weight here in a way that's comfortable for me. So, like, that's been something we're balancing. And we're also, like, adding notes in the score, where we can say you can improvise however you want here, or you can leave out these notes here for what you know, whatever you're able to do, or whatever you want to do. So that's that's kind of been the process it's been, and we just keep a very open mind. And it's also been like asking for input from others of like, what? What do you think? What would you do here? So

Elle Billing:

that's really neat. Thank you for explaining that.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Yeah, thank you.

Elle Billing:

So I have one last question for you.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Okay, yeah.

Elle Billing:

So what is one true thing that you have learned through either playing or teaching piano?

Jaci Rasmussen:

I love this question so much, like, I have to tell you, I was like, Oh, this is such this is such a good question. I think for me, through, I call it musicking. That's kind of like a catch all term for the making of music, making of art through musicking. For me, it's a constant discovery of like, discovering and understanding ourselves and discovering and understanding others, like it's connecting with ourselves, connecting in community, like that has continued to ring true in everything I've done with this art form? So that's been one true thing, and it's pretty amazing.

Elle Billing:

I love that. Thank you. Thanks for being here.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Thanks for having me. And it's so good to see you. I miss you lots

Elle Billing:

where can listeners find you. You have social media. Where they can follow your piano journeys,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yes. So I have a website. It's Jacqueline rasmussen.com and I can send all this to you as well,

Elle Billing:

Yep. And I'll put it in the show notes,

Jaci Rasmussen:

yep, awesome. And then on Instagram, you can find me at Jackie Rasmussen piano. And then I also have a YouTube channel. I'm going to make sure I get this handle right. Get all my handles, yeah. And my youtube channel at Jacqueline rasmussen.com so you can find me there.

Elle Billing:

Perfect. Great. I will put all of that in the show notes so people can see what you're up to.

Jaci Rasmussen:

Awesome. Thank you so much, elle, so good to see you.

Elle Billing:

Thank you for being here. Thank you for joining us on this episode of Hoorf. To get the complete show notes and all the links mentioned on today's episode, or to get a full transcript of the episode, visit hoorfpodcast.com Join the Blessed Herd of St Winkus. By signing up for our newsletter, you can get Hoorf episodes delivered directly to your inbox. What's more, you get invitations to our monthly Coffee and Biscuits Chat, where you get to hang out with Ricki and Elle, talk about the show, and connect on the topics that mean the most to you. You can sign up for that at hoorfpodcast.com; if you become a patron for only $3 a month, you can support the creation of this podcast, help pay my editor, and join a community of caregivers out here, just doing our best. Thank you again for joining me, Elle Billing, the chronically ill queer femme who is very tired, on this episode of Hoorf. Until next time, be excellent to each other. Hoorf is hosted by Elle Billing@elleandwink. Audio editing by Ricki Cummings @rickiep00h music composed by Ricki Cummings. Hoorf is a production of Elle & Wink Art Studio, LLC, all rights reserved. Hoorf can be found on all social media platforms.@hoorfpodcast, at H, O, O, R, F podcast. A sloth is perfectly adapted to its environment.

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Ricki Cummings

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