8 Networking Tips for Introverts & Extroverts - The Long Game - Ep. #94

Most people leave networking events with a stack of business cards and nothing to show for it. Here's why.

In this episode of The Long Game Podcast, Ryan breaks down how he built his network intentionally across Worcester, Providence, and eventually Boston, and shares the specific strategies he wishes he had known when he was filling his calendar with five events a week and talking to everyone without a plan.

He also reframes the follow-up entirely. The goal isn't to book ten coffee meetings. It's to show up with something of value, a warm introduction, a relevant connection, a reason for someone to remember that you thought of them. That single shift, leading with generosity instead of a calendar invite, is what turns a business card into an actual relationship.

What You'll Learn:

• How to choose which markets and which events are worth your time, and which ones to cut
• Why finding the host first at any event is one of the highest-leverage moves you can make in the room
• How to become the person who connects people, and why that role compounds faster than any pitch ever will
• Why it's not only acceptable to exit a conversation that's going nowhere, it's the right call
• How to audit whether you're actually networking or just socializing with a drink in your hand
• Why a drawer full of business cards is a symptom of a follow-up problem, not a networking problem
• How to lead with value in your follow-up so you're memorable before you ever ask for anything

If you're putting time into networking but not seeing it translate into real business relationships, this episode gives you a practical and honest look at where the process is probably breaking down.

Interested in connecting?

HOST
Ryan Richards | Branch Manager, Northpoint Mortgage | NMLS 1987735
rrichards@trynorthpoint.com | www.financewithteamrichards.com 
204 Turnpike Rd, Westborough, MA 01581
Licensed in CT, FL, MA, ME, NH, RI, NC, SC, PA, TN, VT

Follow us on Instagram @financewithteamrichards @the.longgamepodcast

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Chapters:
00:00 Why Networking Matters
00:55 Pick Your Market
01:55 Quality Over Quantity
02:41 Work The Host
03:27 Become The Connector
03:59 Exit Dead End Chats
05:24 Follow Up With Value
06:03 Skip The Coffee Trap
07:00 Stay In Touch Systems
07:30 Final Networking Mindset

Transcript

0:00

Whether you're an introvert or an extrovert, if you're in business, hate to tell you, you're gonna have to network. And I think a lot of times people think that there are certain people who enjoy it, and sure there are, but most people have the same thoughts that you do. They want to build their network. They see a networking event. They're about to leave their house, and they have that decision. Could be a minute, could be five seconds, but you have that thought of, "Do I just stay home, or do I just not go?" Everyone has those thoughts. There are so many decisions that we make every day, and especially when it comes to networking, it's a hard one. But here's some tips and tricks, some things that I did to help build mine, and it's fundamentally changed my whole business. So when you first start building your network, you have to, one, identify obviously what area you want to build your network in. Like, if you're a content creator, that's much different than if you're a, a local service business, right? You might collaborate with people more online than you might if you're an HVAC company. And you wanna pick your markets. Like, are you going to build a network in a market that actually gets you the type of business and connections you're looking for? If you are an HVAC company, probably doesn't make sense to go build a network in the rural part of your state, right? You wanna find places where there are more houses and more people. So be intentional about where you pick your network. And for me early on, it was actually interesting where I picked my network around of obviously where I lived, but I was intentional about trying to go to two different major cities. So for me, it was Worcester, Massachusetts, and the surrounding areas, and then within Providence, Rhode Island. I knew that those were the two metro markets that I really wanted to, to tackle. Over time, I started getting more networked in Boston and kind of created this triangle of my network. But be intentional with where you're going to build your foundation, and be intentional about what types of events you go to to maximize your time. When I first started, I would just fill my calendar, right? Like, when you first start in a sales-oriented business, if your company doesn't have a rigorous training program, which we did not, you show up to work and there's nothing to do, right? Like, other than busy, you know, busywork, posting on social media or whatever, whatever the case. All good activities, but I just filled my schedule. So I would go to five events a week, you know, every one I, I could in the area. And while that's good, over time I learned that there's only certain events that really align with my business, so I don't… I started to weed out the ones that don't have the highest impact or the highest value. But in the beginning it was great. You start meeting people, you're collecting business cards, you're making good connections. But naturally in the beginning, I don't think people take the most advantage of events that they could. So here are some strategies I utilize now that I wish I knew back then. Whenever I go to an event that I intentionally choose, I want to find the person who's the host or affiliated with the host to introduce myself so that I can get more acquainted with them, see what other events they have coming up, how'd they start this, what do they do for work, and ask them a question of, "Hey, I do X. Who in the room do you know that could help me with Y?" Because they hosted the event, chances are there's a lot of regulars there or they know a lot of people, and they'll cut me right to the source and make a direct, warm introduction. So for example, "I'm a loan officer. Do you know anyone here who's a realtor?""Oh, John over there is a realtor.""Do you mind introducing me to him? I'd love to talk to him." And then they bring you right to the person you want to talk to anyway, rather than getting familiar with one person, talking about something that really neither of you are interested in, but you're at a networking event, so you do it anyway. Everyone knows those conversations. Try to be more intentional. And as you get more acquainted and familiar with the group, then become the person that introduces people. Everyone loves that person who goes,"Oh, you know who you should meet?" John or Sam or whoever the person is, they would really align with you. I think they're… You guys would do a lot of business together, at least you'll really get along." And they go out of their way to introduce you at the event. Everyone loves that person. Who doesn't want being brought to someone that they're probably gonna like or do business with? It's great. But find yourself getting more cemented in that relationship of sharing connections and being the people connector. And when you're going to these events, again, be intentional. Don't be afraid to step away from a conversation that you know is going to go nowhere And it's a hard… It's a really hard thing to do when you're talking to someone at an event, and you're five minutes into a conversation about, you know, their dog and whatever, and you're, you're there to do business, and you know that they don't do anything that's related to you. Your conversation's not going well, but you continue to carry on with random questions that neither of you really wanna talk about. Just stop it and say, "Hey, great meeting you. Love to catch up," and grab their business card and, and move on to the next person. I'm gonna go shake some more hands, or I have a couple other people I wanna meet and I only have an hour, so I really appreciate, you know, our time together, but I'm gonna head out and go talk to some other people. Like, it's totally fine. Happens all the time. People do it to me and I'm like, "Hey, good for you," or, "Point taken." You know? Fine with me, right? Move on. So don't be afraid to do that and be intentional with your time because so many times people go, "Oh, I was at networking over three hours last night." No one networks for three hours. You were probably chit-chatting with your friends for an hour. You probably went to the bar a couple times. You might've had two conversations that went too long. How many people did you actually meet that, like, matter to your business or to you? Probably not a ton. Like, it happens all the time. Don't get me wrong, I still do it. I'm very much a vi- I fall victim to this all the time, but I wish I told my younger self that. I spent a lot of time just talking to people that I never touched base with, I never talked to. I don't even know who they are to this day. But find it… Being more intentional about finding connections that make sense for you as you go on becomes more valuable. And then what you do with those connections afterwards is super important. How many business cards do you have in your desk that you never texted if you go to networking events? And for those who go to networking events, I know they're shaking their head right now. I have a desk drawer full of cards that I took and never followed up with or put in my CRM. Why would I do that? What was the point of going? Why'd I get their card? Do something with it. At the very minimum, it should go in your CRM, and at the very most, you should be intentionally following up with them, but providing something of value. So one thing that someone told me a while ago, which I've been more intentional about doing, if you find someone at an event that you want to get in touch with, try to bring something of value to them in hopes of a connection later. Because if you go to an event, you talk to 10 people, you follow up with 10 people for coffee, you just booked 10 coffee meetings. Good luck. Like, do you really need 10 coffee meetings? Do those people really want to meet with you for coffee? Probably not, right? Everyone's looking in… You know, most people are looking for,"Well, what's the value for me?" Right? That's how most people are. But you need to be able to come with them with some sense of value. And what I would say is try to find a connection that you can introduce them to. For example, if you met a real estate attorney out at an event, for me specifically, if I'm a mortgage lender, and I wanted to get to know them better or do business with them, after the event, I could text them in the morning and say, "Hey, Chris, it was great meeting you last night. Would love to stay in touch in the future. I thought of someone who I think you would love to know, I think you could do a lot of business with. I'll put you guys in a group chat and see if maybe you can connect, and they could be a good connection for you.""Oh, great, thanks." If the relationship works, they're always gonna remember that you were the one that introduced them. And if it doesn't, they're gonna remember that you thought of them. Then see where the relationship goes. You know, most of the time you don't need a coffee meeting to stay in touch with someone. Get them in some semblance of communication. The follow-up text which i- intentional, providing value to them. Keep them involved. If you're hosting an event in the future, invite them. If you're posting market updates in your CRM, get them in the CRM. Stay in touch with them in other ways. You don't always have to set all these coffee meetings to really have meaningful connections. Eventually you get there when you really wanna solidify the relationship, but don't waste time,'cause in the end, I could probably Well, then again, I can't name all the people that I had coffee with that I never talked to. So with all this being said, whether you're an introvert or an extrovert, networking is a necessity. Building your sphere is an absolute requirement to become a successful entrepreneur, especially in your local market. So hopefully you took something from today's episode. As always, we'll see you on the next one.