Living Outloud: What is humility, really?

We read Luke 18 and let Jesus challenge the way we pray, the way we compare ourselves, and the way we try to prove our worth to God. We work toward a picture of real humility that asks for mercy and then approaches God like a child who trusts a good Father. 
• the Pharisee’s prayer as comparison and self-congratulation 
• the tax collector’s prayer as honest repentance and mercy 
• humility as a prerequisite for obedience to Christ 
• how social media comparison fuels pride or despair 
• spiritual pride through achievements like fasting and giving 
• a heart check on why we do Christian practices 
• the better comparison as measuring ourselves against God 
• childlike faith as closeness with God without entitlement 
• the freedom of dependence on God and daily trust 

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If Outloud Bible has been a valuable part of your understanding of the Bible, please consider supporting the ministry by visiting outloudbible.com.

Transcript

Why We Practice Living It Out

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Mike here, Kelsey here. Hello. And here we are at another Living Out Loud. We're gonna take a look at something we read earlier in this week. We've been reading the book of Luke. And let's just drill down and talk about what we can actually do with this. And I there's so many things. Obviously, we we can't possibly cover everything, but uh just some things that struck out st stick out to us, strike out to us. Some things that stick out to us and and hopefully, hopefully there's something valuable for you as well.

SPEAKER_02 0:31

If you're new to these living out loud conversations, if you've recently started following the podcast, the the heart behind this uh episode what once a week really is to take literally what James teaches, to not be hearers of the word only, but to be doers of the word. And so if all we do is hear Mike read the Bible as much as I love how he reads it, if all I ever do is listen to him, but I don't apply it and I don't take it and live it out in any kind of way, then I'm being disobedient to the words that I'm hearing. And so that's what this conversation is for. So let's jump into some ways to live out what you read and what we heard earlier this week.

SPEAKER_01 1:10

Yeah, so and and part of being responsible Bible studyers and Jesus followers is we have to take some of the things that the Bible, well, not some of the things, we have to take the times that the the Bible says, hey, you gotta be like this, and we're like, well, I'm not like that, and just kind of wrestle with that. And I think this is one of those times in Luke chapter 18, we see a parable of a Pharisee and a tax collector.

Pharisee Prayer Versus Sinner Prayer

SPEAKER_01 1:35

And uh Jesus kind of gives us an example of, well, the Pharisee prays like this, and it's like super public and vocal, and his prayer, if you can even call it a prayer, is I I I have heavy quotes around the word prayer, is just basically comparing himself to the other people that he doesn't like and is thanking God that he's not like them. And then juxtapose that with a tax collector who even nowadays we don't like really like tax collectors, but it was it was way worse in Jesus' day because a tax collector was often a Jewish person who is getting money from fellow Jews to go give it to Rome, and not just taking taxes over to Rome, but also taking his whatever he wanted to off the top. Rome did not care what uh you charged the people, they just cared about do they get what they're owed. Anything else that I don't know, whatever is up to you, go do it. So plenty of tax collectors took advantage of that opportunity to pad their own wallets, and so they were looked very poorly upon by the Jewish people. So Jesus points out this hypothetical tax collector here in this parable, and hears his prayer of like, God, just please be merciful to me. I'm a sinner, I just need your mercy. And he points this is this is the this is what we're looking for, and this is this is what gets my attention. Um I uh just it this story I can't help but think of uh that's a side note. Uh we watched a series about Jesus. It was uh several years ago at this point, but still a pretty good job. And when it came to this point, Jesus was telling this parable, like it is here in Luke chapter 18, and he looked over, and as he was telling the story about the tax collector's prayer, he looked over and made eye contact with a tax collector. And as Jesus was telling the part of the story of what this tax collector said, God be merciful to me, a sinner, he was making eye contact, and you could see that this tax collector was mouthing these words along with him and just crying because he had in this telling had that was his prayer some time ago. And just the acknowledgement that that Jesus is like, I heard your prayer, I know your prayer, and just like in this story, that man went home justified, that's true of you, and then went on to invite Matthew, the tax collector, in this case, to follow him. That is a little creative detail. I don't know if it actually worked out that way. I don't know if this tax collector specifically is Matthew, um, but uh interesting to think about, could be. So that story aside, what we have here is an example of humility. Jesus his whole point of telling this parable is that for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but he who humbles himself will be exalted.

What Humility Really Looks Like

SPEAKER_01 4:25

So we're talking about humility here in this story and really kind of throughout this chapter. Uh it's a pretty common theme. And we we know as Christians, like this is something we have to get right. Like we know humility is some something that that God demands of us, that he creates in us, that he kind of cultivates in us. Uh, we're told to humble ourselves, so like we do have some uh active role in this, but uh we can't possibly just be humble on our own. We need his help. And and what it is it even anyway, is it it's it's kind of this thing that we know that we need to do, but I don't know necessarily how to do it, or do I know that I did it? Did I get there? Am I humble enough now? Uh I know C.S. Lewis talks about how uh as soon as like you get to the point where like, oh, you know what? I did pretty well. I I think I was pretty humble. Well, that now you need more work. And you ruined it.

SPEAKER_02 5:24

Okay, so uh and Philippians 2 talks about how we ought to be like Jesus who humbled himself by becoming obedient even to the point of death. Uh Philippians 2, 8. And so being humble, humbling ourselves is a Christ-like place to be. It's a Christ-like position to take. Um, and so I think that Jesus does a a service to us, it's a gift to us that he gives some of these examples through these stories in this chapter of Luke to give us a story of uh a vision of what it looks like to be humble.

SPEAKER_01 6:00

Beyond his own example. The fact that Jesus was humble at all is wild to me. He did not need to be humble.

SPEAKER_02 6:09

Right.

SPEAKER_01 6:09

Like he he he is worthy of all of our worship and our praise. He doesn't owe us anything, he doesn't need to elevate anyone above himself. Like that sounds blasphemous. And yet he washed feet and he served. So I've I mean the ultimate example of humility ultimately is Jesus. Uh and it's still hard to believe that he would even take on that quality, but yet he's demonstrating what we should do. I think his being humble is for our benefit to to know how to live and how to be right with God. And ultimately, who's more right with God than Jesus?

SPEAKER_02 6:47

Like and and that verse in Philippians says, like, humbled himself in obedience. So the obedience that that we are called to is a humbling. Like we I I I I would venture to say we cannot be obedient to Christ. We cannot be obedient to God without being humble. Like humbling ourselves is the start of the obedience and the act of obedience at the same time.

SPEAKER_01 7:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:14

That that is the rest of obedience, the rest of following the commands of Jesus and following the way God calls us to live starts with humility because it it because humility forces us to put our pride aside because they're they're in opposition. You can't be humble and prideful at the same time. And so by putting our pride aside and submitting ourselves to God is an act of humility. And the rest of living a Christ-like life is only possible when you start from a place of humility, submitting to God.

SPEAKER_01 7:42

Yeah, we can say that outright. You cannot obey God without humility. You cannot please God without humility. So we got to figure it out. And it's not a one-time thing, like, oh, I finally decided to do it. I'm humble now.

SPEAKER_00 7:56

Right.

SPEAKER_01 7:56

No, it's it's a process and God knows it. And he guides us through the process and he gives us examples along the way.

SPEAKER_02 8:01

Yeah, so this story that Jesus told, uh, again, that Bible series that you referenced had this beautiful connection, connecting Matthew's conversion story and calling and with with this. But all we actually have in scripture is that Jesus told this story to make a point.

SPEAKER_01 8:17

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 8:17

Um, and so in this story, Michael, you'll say all the time, never assume when reading the Bible that you're the good guy in the story.

SPEAKER_00 8:24

Here's a great case.

SPEAKER_02 8:25

So a good act of humility would just be to say, Who am I in this story? Where does my heart actually align? Am I are my prayers a little bit more like the Pharisee or more in line with how the uh how the tax collector prays? And then what does the tax collector's prayer teach us about humility in a practical living out loud kind of way?

SPEAKER_01 8:46

And on the flip side, what does the Pharisee's prayer teach us about how to not be humble and make sure we're not doing those sort of things? I I think it's and I think it's worth a look. Like, let's not assume we're the good example right now, or let's not assume we're the good guy. The Pharisee, his prayer kind of boils down to a couple things. God, thank you that I'm not like these other people. Thank you that I am better off

How Comparison Fuels Pride

SPEAKER_01 9:05

than all these other people. Uh there's there's a comparison, and it's interesting because I think we'll see in a second. Like, comparison is not a bad thing, just who you're comparing yourself with, I think is is the key. Comparing yourself with other people and other situations is going to result in either just uh depression or pride. It's one or the other. Because you're always, I remember it's it's kind of like that motherly advice. I don't know if my mother literally said it, uh, but like I don't actually don't know where the quote came from.

SPEAKER_02 9:35

I uh I know exactly what you're saying, and I know exactly where it came from. Why do I have it in my head? It was uh Dr. James Phipps, who was a professor at our university where we went, where we met, and he did our premarital counseling. And in our premarital counseling, his advice, one of the pieces of gems of advice that he gave us, was never compare yourselves to other people. And he was giving it in a marital advice context, but it's like in our uh wedding ceremony, too.

SPEAKER_01 10:02

Oh, he did.

SPEAKER_02 10:03

Never compare yourselves to other people because in in comparing yourself, you will either find yourself higher than others and therefore exalt yourself in your own mind, or you'll find better others better off than you, and you'll find yourself uh envious, jealous, or depressed in your own situation. He was much more eloquent in how he said it, but but that that really is the danger in comparison. And we have to really be honest right now that like we live in a world that thrives off of comparison, thrives off of it. Mike, I I find myself sitting and scrolling on my phone and just finding myself, ugh, I'm not, I don't have what that person has. I I don't have the body that person has, I don't have the wealth this person has, I don't have the influence that person has. I don't have for me, it's almost always other people are better off than I am, and I end up being a little bit jealous, right?

SPEAKER_01 10:56

But you find the highlights of other people's lives and you compare your low, low.

SPEAKER_02 11:01

And that's how social media is built. And we're we're taking in so much um content of other people's highlight reels that it's we live really in a society right now that is thrive that thrives off of comparison. Yeah, and marketing thrives off of comparison, and money is made by making you compare yourself to other people, trying to fix the gap you feel when you compare. Right.

SPEAKER_01 11:25

That that's what that's what they're trying to do.

SPEAKER_02 11:27

And so it's it's it's dangerous not only because it'll drive you to a place of sinning through envy and jealousy and uh becoming just depressed and un discontent with with where you are and what you have in life, it will also kill the humility that Christ wants to create in us, right? Like the humility Jesus wants to make in me is is going to be stunted if I spend my time comparing myself to other people.

SPEAKER_01 11:52

Okay, so we normally attribute humility or the opposite, I suppose, pride to finding yourself better than other people. How can you compare yourself and think yourself maybe worse off than other people or want what they have? How is that pride?

SPEAKER_02 12:07

That's a great question. I I was actually questioning that in my mind even as I was speaking, but I think it's still there. The pride is still there because of I think Jesus' purpose in teaching this story in the first place is when we are consumed with comparing ourselves to other people, whether we find ourselves better off than or worse off than they are, we are focused on ourselves. It's still it's an inward focus and it's a and it will drive us to make decisions that will either elevate our position or or we'll be like, oh, well, I don't want anybody to think I'm all that, so I'm gonna like make decisions to look humble, even though I because I think I'm better than other people, so I just want to look humble and that ends up in a false humility. But I think the I think the challenge is that it it all comes down to where your focus is. And if your focus is horizontal, your focus is comparing yourself to other people, it is prideful because you're thinking about yourself. You're thinking about yourself and you are comparing yourself to other people, and whether you end up on top or bottom of that comparison, it's still a inward focus, which is prideful.

SPEAKER_01 13:21

If you find yourself on the on the low side of that comparison, then you're gonna feel like you feel like you should have something that you don't, which is prideful, or you feel like, oh well that they got something because of some thing, you know, that some privilege that I don't have that I should have. And it's yeah, it's it's the fact that it's so focused on yourself at all that pride does not just show up in thinking yourself better than or having more than someone else. Um the this Pharisee's prayer also uh talks about what he does. Like I fast twice a week, I give a tenth of everything I get, and that was how he kind of ends

The Trap Of A Spiritual Resume

SPEAKER_01 14:00

his prayer here. And so the other thing to look out for is pride in our own achievements, thinking that those count for something. Um that that is relatable today. We gotta be real real careful. Real careful that when we're kind of uh talking to God or considering our place before God, that we're not trying to fill that gap with stuff that we do. We know there's a gap between us and God. Like I don't think there's anyone so arrogant to think that they are better than God so much that they would even say it. But um but we recognize often that there's this gap, but then we try to kind of justify, well, you know I I know God, but like I do I go to church regularly, you know. I I I'm a big tither at church.

SPEAKER_02 14:47

I I lead a ministry at church, you know, and and we think that that counts for something like we're it's like building up a resume in front of God and being like, God, you should bless me and be happy with me because look at everything I do. Like quite frankly, we should be fasting. That's a commandment. We should be giving. That's a commandment. Like we should be, we should be God commands these things of us. God commands generosity of his followers, God commands faithfulness to attending uh gatherings with other believers to encourage one another and to study and to learn and worship together. He like these are things we ought to be doing. Um, but it's not so that we can build a resume before God to prove to him how good we are. And it's not to build a resume to prove that we're better than the other people around us who aren't doing as much as we are. Those things ought to be an outpouring of the love that we have for God and the humility in our hearts, wanting to serve him and worship him. And so this Pharisee's prayer really is exposing, and we have to be honest with ourselves if if we fall into this sometimes, exposing that mindset of what I do, what I accomplish defines my value in the kingdom. What I accomplish defines my worth in the kingdom, what I accomplish defines my stat, my status compared to other people in the kingdom. And and I'm looking really good right now because I do a lot.

SPEAKER_01 16:10

It's real tricky because this Pharisee, like, he has gratitude. God thank you, that da-da-da. He has righteousness, like yeah, yeah, he at least by his own measures, there he's not an adulterer, he doesn't extort people, and he doesn't steal from people. Like, that's good, good. I'm glad. If that's the measure, then yes, you are living a righteous life. I don't think there's more missing, Jesus calls it out. Um, but yeah, and he fasts, he he tithes, those are good things. So this is just a reminder. It's like, can we just do a check of the things that we do as an expression of our following Jesus, as an expression of our Christian faith? Why are we doing them? We need to have a heart check.

SPEAKER_02 16:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:53

Flip side, we get to see this tax collector. And he's Jesus, there's a couple details here. He stood far off. Like he's not he's not in the middle of people, he like the Pharisee

Compare Yourself To God Instead

SPEAKER_01 17:05

is, he's just by himself. And he would not even look up to heaven. Now, is looking down when you pray more humble or holy than looking up? No, you like it's not a matter of your posture uh on the outside, it is a matter of your heart posture, because in his case, he's like, I he he beat his breasts, he's like he's in agony over the fact that he's a sinner and he needs God's mercy. He he recognizes that he he's not even worthy to look up to heaven. Like God, I need you to to to just give have mercy on me because I I I don't even deserve for you to hear this prayer right now.

SPEAKER_02 17:48

So, in direct opposition to the pride of comparison, we have this tax collector example comparing himself to Almighty God and finding himself falling short. Um, instead of comparing himself, well, I'm a good tax collector. I don't I don't extort from as many people as that guy does, so I'm a good one. Or like he's not comparing to other people. He's not finding people who are worse off than he is, so he's prideful. He's not finding people who are better off than he is, making him like disdain. Like he's comparing himself to the holy God and recognizing that he's falling short. And the only person who can forgive him of that and who can rectify that and who can bring righteousness into his heart is God. And so that's where his comparison is, that's where his eyes are, and um, and and that's where our eyes should be too.

SPEAKER_01 18:34

We're gonna compare. That's just kind of how we're made as humans, and that's okay as long as we are comparing ourselves to God and his heart and his word. He's given us his word. Let's compare. That's kind of what we're doing here. Can we compare our hearts with the heart that of God communicated through his word? And when we do that, frankly, it's n it the picture's pretty grim.

SPEAKER_00 18:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 18:57

Um but but that should lead us not to depression and self-deprecation, uh, but it should lead us to a prayer of God, be merciful to me. God, I need your mercy. I can't do I can't do this on my own. I can't be righteous on my own. I just need your mercy to to cover everything I've done. And it's a long list. So through this story, we see that humility really is an accurate comparison of yourself before God. I think it's an accurate understanding of your position before God. Because if it's if we compare with other people, we're gonna find ourselves on the good end or the bad end of that comparison, and neither leads us to humility, but we compare ourselves with God, we see how short we fall. We we we can say something like Paul said, like, I'm the I'm the chief sinner. Like, of all that's like a comparison. It sounds like he's comparison Paul's comparing himself with other people, like of all the sinners out there, I am the greatest sinner. And almost feels like false humility, because I think false humility is trying to posture yourself vertically with God in light of what other people think and comparing with other people. And that's not right. We I I think and I think Paul, it's not a false humility. I think it comes from I compare myself to you and your holiness and your standard of holy, and I I'm so far off the mark that I just I need you to to for me to even have a shot at standing before you, you and your presence.

SPEAKER_02 20:33

And yet, I love that this story Jesus tells in Luke, the way Luke's written and laid out, the immediate next story we hear from Jesus' life. It may not have been immediate,

Childlike Faith And Coming Close

SPEAKER_02 20:44

it doesn't look in the text like it's immediately the same moment, but the next thing we read is about Jesus welcoming little children to come to him. And I think we see a continuation of the discussion of humility. I think we see a continuation of Jesus giving more examples of what a humble life before God looks like. Because you know what my daughter isn't doing? She's not comparing herself to me and being like, oh, I'm not as good as mom. And so therefore I'm gonna run away from her and stay away from my mom as much as possible until I'm good enough to come before her. Like, I hope she doesn't think that. It would break my heart if she thought that. Like, I want her to maybe if she compares herself to me, be like, I want to be more like my mom, I want to be a mom that would set that kind of example. Of course, we have a perfect heavenly father who's not hoping he's giving a good enough example. But just as a parent, I can relate to like, I want my child to come to me. Um and so Jesus, in this context of teaching us to be humble and teaching us what it looks like to be humble before God, he says, be like little children who would just come to him, let them come to me, go to your heavenly father. Yeah. And and I think if we get too wrapped up in the mindset of the of the um the tax collector in Jesus' story, who didn't even want to raise his eyes to heaven, yes, Jesus commended this kind of behavior. But at the same time, like just the flip side of that, Jesus' interaction with the children shows us that that we don't need to just shade our eyes from heaven.

SPEAKER_01 22:23

We don't need to leave him alone because we're not even worthy.

SPEAKER_02 22:26

Yeah, we like falling in a place of like, I'm not even worthy to approach, like I'm not even worthy to ask, I'm not worthy to go to him, would would break his heart. He's a father who wants us to be his children and come to him and to come to him regularly and continually and to trust him wholeheartedly and and to trust that when he says, I am your father and I will care for you and cast your cares on me, for I care for you. When he says these things, when he says, Don't worry about your life, but trust me and seek my kingdom and I will take care of you. When he says these things, he means it. And he's a good father that that he will not give us a stone when we ask for bread. When we trust him to feed us, Michael, you and I have been called into this life, and our our friend

Living In The Freedom Of Dependence

SPEAKER_02 23:10

listening may not be in the same exact boat as we are, the way God's called us to live, but God has called us to live, not bringing in a full-time paycheck from any job. We don't have a job with an hourly uh paycheck. We don't have a salary coming from anywhere. God just said, trust me and let me take care of you. And it is our job to humble ourselves like children, to humble ourselves and be in the position to say, okay, my heavenly father has said that he'll take care of me if I if I follow him in this way. And so I'm gonna do that. And it's it is an act of humility every single day because there are ways that I could come up with to provide for myself. And yet God has called us, you and me, Mike, to live a life where we decide it is not up to me how we're going to be taken care of financially. It is up to God to take care of us financially, and it is a constant, daily act of humility to say, okay, I'm going to give up the rights to find ways to provide for our family. And I'm just going to trust God to take care of us because he said he would. And in the same way that children ought not to be worrying about how they're going to what when we look at a family or a child in a situation where the child has to work or the child has to worry about where they're going to sleep at night or how they're going to eat, that's a tragic situation. Everybody recognizes that.

SPEAKER_01 24:32

But shouldn't we be able to do it?

SPEAKER_02 24:32

Secular and religious, you recognize that a child should not have to be worrying about where they're going to sleep or how they're going to eat. Like a child does not worry about those things when they are in a healthy family, when they have good parents. We have good, a good parent. We have a good father who is protecting us and caring for us and providing for us. And it is an act of humility as grown adults to say, I'm going to trust you wholeheartedly, even to the extent of being like a child and just trusting that you're going to take care of things behind the scenes that I don't even have to worry about.

SPEAKER_01 25:06

Which goes back to this idea of uh this kind of the definition of humility that we're hashing out here is this proper understanding of your relationship with God, of how you stand before God. It's not so low that you're like, oh well, I I'm not even gonna I'm not even gonna bother you. And it's not so high that you think yourself more highly than you ought. It's this uh perfect perfect example that Jesus gave of being like a child.

SPEAKER_02 25:29

A child is a perfect balance of recognizing I'm valuable to this person. Yeah. They care for me. I can go up to them anytime I want. I'm important to them, but also recognizing I'm not like better. Like I am dependent.

SPEAKER_01 25:44

I'm very much dependent on this person.

SPEAKER_02 25:45

I'm very much dependent on this person, and they're crazy about me, and they'll take care of me. And and and that's a healthy, attached child. Like that's a healthy attachment that a child has to a parent when they just can live in the I before we started recording. You said we were we were chatting about this concept, and you used the phrase um living in the freedom of dependence. Like humility allows us to live in the freedom of dependence on God. When we strike out an independence, we take on a lot of responsibility that perhaps God didn't intend for us to have. Again, just like a good parent, I want my child to be responsible. Yeah and teach her to be responsible. I give her opportunities.

SPEAKER_01 26:30

I don't want you to be lazy because you're so secure in our relationship. Right.

SPEAKER_02 26:34

And being secure in our relationship, you ought to know that I have some expectations of you.

SPEAKER_01 26:37

And so putting- You shouldn't want to please and so please don't misunderstand this.

SPEAKER_02 26:41

Please don't mishear what I'm trying to say. But but there is this level of independence that pushes us towards pride and selfishness and self-centeredness. And God's really inviting us to have a freedom in dependence upon him. Live freely, like a child lives freely in the home of a parent who takes care of them. That child is aware that they are dependent on their parent, they are aware that their parent loves them, and they live freely being dependent on their parent. And I think that that is such a beautiful picture, and that's why Jesus shared it with his disciples. And I think it's why Luke writes it in this order, or connecting these dots to say humility is that right perception of yourself before God, and part of that perception is recognizing you're his child and you are fully dependent on him, but you can trust that because he's gonna take care of you.

SPEAKER_01 27:32

So if you have a child, thinking about what that relationship would be, how would you want them to approach you and ask you for something? Can you model your prayers like that? Maybe you don't have children, but you were a child once, and I don't know if your father or mother was was a a really healthy, supportive, great example of a mother and father or not. But what would you wish you could be able to go approach your father to do? As a child, before you had bills, before you had to pay taxes, before you had a job and all the stresses of other relationships, before your heart was broken that way, how would you go to the ideal parent? Can we model our prayers that way? And I think in doing so, in taking this example that Jesus Himself gave of like, let's let's be like these children. That's how we enter the kingdom of God. There's a level of humility, a level of comfort and freedom in the dependence on your on your parent that we can use to really inform how we can go before God. Yeah, we may need to beg for his mercy because we fall short, but don't let Satan get there to to to prevent you from going to him in the first place. God loves you, he wants you, he's crazy

Go Talk To Your Father

SPEAKER_01 28:49

about you, and he very much wants you to see yourself the way he sees you. And I believe that is real humility. That's a good starting point here today. And uh I pray that uh this blesses you as you go. Go go talk to God. Get off of this podcast. Go talk to God, go talk to your heavenly father, and let him uh and and have him tell you a little bit about how he sees you. Pray that blesses you, and I uh we'll look forward to seeing you next time on the Out Loud Bible Podcast.