Diane00:01
Life you and be life. Life You and
TrevFM00:13
Hello Neighbors. Welcome to another episode of Spread Love fm. Good neighbors, good conversations, and good vibes. I'm your host. In this episode, I chat with New York native and my cousin Diane Rolands about growing up the youngest of 13 kids and first born American in Crown Heights, Brooklyn.
Diane00:36
You know, when you're a big family, it's always something going on.
Our Christmas is, is with tremendous Thanksgiving. It's, whoa, you know, it's always something we don't even need to invite. Nobody. We don't. You just say we're having Thanksgiving and whoop. It's like a thousand people, you know.
TrevFM00:55
Enjoy. So, Diane Rawlins, how are you?
Diane01:00
I am fine.
TrevFM01:02
You are fine. How was your day today?
It was, it
Diane01:05
was good. It was pleasant. Very good. Good to hear. How's everything with you? I know you're running around all the time. Busy.
TrevFM01:12
Well, not like I used to. Not like I used to in the big old city. Um, so I'm more like running around in this one location and kind of cruising around the rest of Spring Hill.
Um. Okay. But, um, yeah, so I guess we should get into it. We start off a little late, so, um, I, we are here to talk to Diane Rolands about, uh, growing up in New York City, in East Flatbush. Um, one of only 13, uh, am I right there? 13? Uh, yeah, Correct. One of only 13 kids, um, siblings. And we wanna talk to her about, uh, growing up in the seventies, Crown Heights, Brooklyn, the youngest, and one and only, and the first American born.
So Diane, let's start from the beginning. Give us a little background about, um, where you were born, um, where you grew up, um, and let's start off there. All right? Okay. Fine. Let me, let me an like, Actually, Diane, I have to also make a disclaimer that you and I are cousins. Yeah. That's important to. Because it'll, uh, give a insight to the rest of the interview.
So, Diane? Yes. Tell us a little bit about your background.
Diane02:23
I remember Brooklyn well, you know, this hiphop era came in at some point, break dancing. Um, so we, we are, I guess I am the, in the age of the, The, what do you call that? Age? The, I guess the eighties, so you know what was going on in the eighties, right?
Mm-hmm. , I mean, growing up, because you know, when you're born to, you know, the first part of your years, you're not really, um, into any trend or styles or, or if in any music really, but at some point, Yeah. I remember, and I, I could tell you my earliest memories is like in the eighties, you know, The new age music, Well, the music that we, I grew up on was, you know, the hiphop came in and, um, of course you would have some of the get down Boogie, Yogi, Yogi, you know, some of the sevens,
Yes. Yeah. So I mean, that was, uh, my gen, you know, Chira, you know, at the time. That's type of music and stuff that was going on with, with my generation. So then I
TrevFM03:31
know, do you remember the disco? Not the disco, but the roller skating? Uh, that
Diane03:36
Yeah, yeah. I remember. You know, vaguely. But yeah, the roller skating, um, the, the, the, what you call those flare pants in the bottom, the bell
TrevFM03:46
bottoms.
Bottoms, Yes. Yes.
Diane03:48
Yeah. I remember some of it at a leather jacket. , the long trench kind of leather jacket. Look with, with the bell bottoms, you know, you see some of those. . Yeah, that's, that's the seventies, I guess to the 80.
TrevFM04:04
And it's, it's, what's strange is that there was that transition where a rapper's delight came out and mm-hmm.
It's almost like, what was the music that played? I'm a little bit older than you and I,
Diane04:16
um, I remember when day came out, it was like a hip hop, a HiPE, HiPE, HiPE, hip, hip hop. You don't stop. You remember that? Yeah.
TrevFM04:24
. And the funny, the funny story that I also wanna share is, um, When that, when that track first came out, cuz I used to spend a lot of summers over just about every summer.
I remember spending over at your house in the summer and I remember when that track first came out and how we were saying it over and I, I was learning every word
I dunno if you remember
Diane04:51
the same thing. I dunno. I mean, I remember singing a song. I don't know if I was like just sitting down, just trying to memorize it, but, But I remember, you know, learning this song too. I mean, singing this song over and over, I remember, I remember a lot of stuff, you know, Double Dutch, you know?
Oh
TrevFM05:07
yeah. Wow. Yeah. I forgot about
Diane05:09
Double Dutch. Yeah, it was a lot. Those were the days for the young people, you know, young kids. That's our. I don't know. Now is the computer age, right? Mm-hmm. . Mm-hmm. . But we actually used to go outside and play. Right.
TrevFM05:26
. Yeah. Novel idea. Get
Diane05:28
outside and, and we didn't have the Dodge Bullets, you know?
TrevFM05:31
Yeah. That's good that it's, It was such an innocent time. It felt like it was a time where everybody, you know, we would. I wanna share how, when we were at your place in Crown Heights, which is where you, you, uh, grew up first, let, I guess, let me backtrack a little bit. Do you, were you always at Crown Heights?
Is that your memories? Always in the first years? Well,
Diane05:55
in the early part. I remember a little bit by you, your area. I don't remember. I mean, I'm trying to remember, but do you remember where you grew up Over there in Park East Flatbridge Park, Right. Parkside over there, I think. Was it.
TrevFM06:10
So now let's get, let's, let's talk about your friend.
Like I, I remember my, our memories, me, my sister, my brother coming over there on in the summers. Your family was the closest to our family as far as I remember in terms of when we were very young. And um, I remember the joy and the love that we experienced coming over there and, uh, your mom, uh, rest in peace.
Um, how we would come and there was so much love given there. Mm-hmm. so much love. Not only in that it was a, describe your building and describe, uh, your block in the neighborhood.
Diane06:50
Right. So, Okay. I guess we were, we're a big family, so, um, at the end of the day, . Even our, the friends, cuz my brothers, you know, my brothers would have friends, you know, and then friends was like, if they were like family after a while, cuz you know, everybody grew so close.
So yeah, our neighbor that was one of his good friends, my brother's good friend, um, who went to school with him. He was one of our neighbors. Um, uh, I think. There was, um, a bodega, you know, down, you know the bodega by
TrevFM07:29
Yes. Of course. Downstairs. Yes. Right. I forgot about that. Wow.
Diane07:33
Yeah. The memories. And Carlos, which is, you know, you knows about my sister's Yes.
Husband. He and his family owned the bodega those times. So he, you could say the block, like you said, the block. , you know, we knew. And then across the street, I think I had a sister who worked across the street, but the daycare center and she, she, um, we knew the kids there, so it is like everybody knew each other.
Mm-hmm. , there's a different in these times. And then in the, where we were, where we were living, we actually, my, my parents rented both apartments, so it was a two family and we were controlling the whole Yes. Yeah. two family, two
TrevFM08:14
apartments. And downstairs was a, that was the
Diane08:17
daycare and, and that was another daycare.
Yes. So course, actually two daycare on the block. Yeah.
TrevFM08:22
Yes. That was on. And, um, the block, Remember how, talk about how we used to play in the streets in, in a way that I don't think we could do today. Uh, running up in those, in, in the, uh, brownstones Tell, talk about.
Diane08:39
Yeah, so I guess we used to play tag, right?
Mm-hmm. or Hide and Sea? Yeah, . And I think we had a dog. Well, remember we had a dog, Scotty, do you
TrevFM08:51
remember Scott? Yes. Scotty, of course. Oh yeah, Scotty. I
Diane08:54
forgot about Scotty. Right? So we will, the way the buildings were set up, they had that, that, I guess that, what do you call it, in the middle? What do you call that?
In the middle? You call that like a brick?
TrevFM09:09
Yeah, like a ledge or I don't know what they,
Diane09:11
Yeah, that separates it. But it was low enough that we could have just kick our legs over and so that was our, that was it. So we were run from, you could be from the beginning of the block, running all the way across, down to the middle of the block from house to house.
And here I remember one. Speaking about our dog, Scotty, I think our neighbor had a dog, um, or one of our, my brother's friend, and that dog used to jump over the walls after us, so I remember that too. That was a little scary, but, but it was all in fun. All fun.
TrevFM09:46
Yeah. It was amazing to think that. Good, Good times.
Yeah,
Diane09:49
good times.
TrevFM09:51
Now, I, I ever eventually wanna get into you raising your kids and how it's different from back then. Do you think kids can do that? Have that type of fun, you know, running up on people's, I mean, what do you think? Like, do you think that can ha is something that can happen today?
Diane10:07
Well, um, well, looking at the, the way things are, I.
It was so in, I mean, like you said, it was so innocent then. I mean, huh? I It could have been. I never me younger than didn't see it as a problem. Maybe it was a problem for the. , the people who live there, I'm not sure. But us jumping from house to house to house, I mean, we never had an issue and no one ever came out cuz it wasn't like we were, you know, breaking down people's homes or anything, or breaking, you know, destroying anything.
We are just running, you know, But it, it could be a hassle, but in today's time, I don't know if our children would be welcome to do such a thing. You know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, in these times it's d. Who knows, Someone might call the cops. They didn't call cops back then. Really? Yeah. For that. Those are little kids, but now they may call the cop and then you see what happens sometimes if what starts off innocent or uh, simple, someone's playing could turn into deadly force, you know, or some, something crazy.
So, so those times were different. I don't know if our children would get away with some things that we did back then. Today I don't. I'm not sure. I, I never had my kids doing that, so I don't know. So I can't tell you. Right. So
TrevFM11:32
now let's get into what it was growing up. Uh, the first Born American, which is, I also hold that title in my family.
Um, what was it like being the first born of a large immigrant family? What are, what are your memories, uh, of
Diane11:48
that? Well, first of all, I mean, I have no complaints. I mean, I. Being in a big family. I mean, you always have someone to play with.
you always have someone to play with. I mean, you, you, if your sister is busy, you could go and bother somebody else. You know, if your brothers or whatever with his friends, then, you know, it's always somewhere. And then we had a pets, we always had pets. We always had a cat or we always had dogs or, or dog and cats, you know.
you could play with your cat. You know? I mean, it's always something to do, you know, in a big family. And then I had you guys . I used to go by you guys a lot too, you know? Yeah. You guys were the first people with these, these arcade games. I remember that. Oh, is that so? Yeah. Well that's what I remember. I remember going by your house.
I used to love to go by you guys house. Here go the video games. That's right. Mean who else had Donkey Kong, and um, what was the other one? Um, Mario Brothers in those days. Zack son. And
TrevFM12:56
yes, you guys were Likeactually, but no, that's actually, that's Diane, I like to correct you there cuz I remember my first memory of a video game was coming to your place.
Diane13:06
Are you talking about them sticks that hit the, the um, yes Pong.
TrevFM13:11
Oh yeah, I, if I'm not mistaken, I'll have to ask somebody else in that family. But I remember you having the, I think it was the Atari or some,
Diane13:19
I think so. Some. And it was where you hit the thing. Yes. Could you imagine that game today? My kids were looking at me like, I'm like, I have three heads.
Like, what is this? just standing there hitting a thing, click. Like, you know, Really? Oh man.
TrevFM13:38
You know, but back then it was state of the art.
Diane13:41
Oh, yes. What? I could've wait to get on it, you know,
TrevFM13:46
. Right. But, um, that, that's, uh, and I also remember the, um, just run, We would play, we would play like have Cowboy and Indian and in your place.
And we were running up and down, I guess before we were run outside. And maybe it was too early. Um, but you were right. Always had somebody to play with. Yeah.
Diane14:06
Always had somebody to play with. I don't know if I could have done that, like. a house full of children, you know, or have so many kids because I need a piece, you know, And I know, you know, when you're a big family, it's always something going on.
Our Christmas is, is tremendous. Mm-hmm. Thanksgiving, it's whoa, You know, it's always something, you know, when and one day we do it. We, we don't even need to invite nobody. I mean, if it's mm-hmm. mm-hmm. , if it's the case, you know what I mean? We don't, you just say we're having Thanksgiving and. It's like a thousand people, you know?
Yes. And whoever you know, comes with their family. Now they're married, you know, so now it's grandchildren and niece and nephews, and it's, uh, so it's, it's a great, I tell you, uh, I wouldn't want it any different. I love coming from a big family. Of course, everything has its pros and cons, but, uh, I remember all the good.
Yeah.
TrevFM15:07
And in terms I don't remember how we, uh, like we would eat. I, I can't imagine the whole family. I don't remember the whole family eating together. Not even in my family. Yeah. We had, we had strange ways, like I guess we would make our own eating schedule
Diane15:24
Yeah. I mean, I mean, I remember when my mom did cook and it's. Food and you go get your food, but you wasn't, it wasn't like traditional sit at a table unless it's a Thanksgiving situation. And then they set it up in a way. But even that, not everyone could fit on a table. Yeah. So you would have, you know, you get your food and you go and you sit down, you eat.
it could be in the living, well not the living room. Cuz if, you know, we parent them chairs are in plastic, so you ain't sitting on no chairs, you won't be sitting on their chairs. But, um, but anywhere else, you know? Yes,
TrevFM16:03
yes. I remember not being able to eat in the living room when I was right next to the kitchen.
Yes. Um, that was off limits. Uh, which is I guess a common thing now today, having been one of even. Six or five would be considered a lot to date. Yeah. Um, back then, do you, do you know why there was, because I know our parents, uh, your mom and my mom, they also came from a big family. Do you remember how many siblings our parents had?
Diane16:38
Um, I think it was 11.
TrevFM16:42
And that seems common. I guess that was being the first American and coming from a place, uh, that we are not familiar, familiar with. Cause Trinidad for me, um, is kind of a foreign place for me. I am, I, I consider myself more of a Brooklynite with West Indian Heritage. Um, yeah. Um, but I, I feel like all of.
Um, older family being that we are the first, um, in the American line, like this is something that's more common to them, like, how did you feel and being the, the last born in that family, how did you feel coming into that? Did you realize, did it feel different to you or did it seem normal to you?
Diane17:27
I think I was here and then my siblings came up, so, It wasn't like they were here and then I was born and then Oh, I didn't know that. Right, right. So at some point, you know, it is a process. So they had to, I guess, you know, the paperwork had to get together, but they, I mean, they came up when I was, I think maybe five or six.
Okay. I can't remember. 4, 5, 6, 1 of those, either five or or something like that. And that's when I met them all. So, um, at first it was just, And then Really I did not know that. Right. Right. It was me for a while and then, um, at some point my siblings came up and, you know, you're told your siblings are coming up.
Mm. And you're constantly told, so you know you have siblings. Mm. But you just never met them yet. And then at some point they're telling. , they're coming up and then the first set come up, which is the older ones. And then after a while, you know, the second set come up, which was the younger ones. Okay. So the older ones come up first and then a while later, you, you see the younger ones come at some point.
Um, I can't tell you the timeframe because I'm young. I was little, so I can't remember like when everything really transpired, but. But that was a process. So now having them here, it was like getting used to not being by myself. Mm-hmm. . And then also remember, they're coming from a place where we could talk about accents.
So , they're coming from a place where I, you know, hearing a certain tone and accent, and then they're coming over. Younger ones, older ones. But the younger ones especially. . I'm trying to understand what they're saying. I remember looking, actually, you remember a boy, my brother ? Yes. Yeah. But I remember looking at, you know, looking at his lips because I couldn't understand at the time.
Wow. Because I was younger, you know, younger and, and I was like, I guess when you're four or five, you know? Mm-hmm. , you're used to the accent. Took me a minute to get, So once the accent. Really, um, kicked in my ears, got tuned to the, the tone and the sound of the voice of how the voice and the, you know, you.
Trinidadian Tone is kind of like a singing, kind of like a right Once my ear got tuned to that as a young child, cuz kids, they, they pick a quick mm-hmm. and yeah, once I, that was it. I, there was nothing they could have said. , you know, was saying that I didn't understand, but in the beginning it was a little tough for.
To understand. And then after a while it was like, Wow, okay, . But I couldn't understand when my friends would tell me that, you know, like, Wait a minute, where are you from? . And I'm born right here in Brooklyn, in New York. But because I guess, you know, you grow up, um, with your family and they're all with these accents, you don't realize you pick it up too.
Mm-hmm. . So here they're telling. Where are you from? You know? And I'm like, Where I'm from , what are you, I'm looking at him like, What are you talking about? And they said, I hear an accent. And I'm like, You hear an accent, . You know? And, and that was what I grew. I remember growing up too. And then when I'm around my Trinidadian friends or my West Indian friends, they were like, Whoa, you Yankee, you American, you this, you that, you know?
At the end of the day, I was in the middle. I, I, I didn't too much. Did they believe that I am totally Trinidadian and on the other side, I wasn't fully American, although I was born here, I wasn't fully because they would be like, Wait, you. Did you ever have that issue?
TrevFM21:30
Of course. Yeah. We speak about that a lot.
I even to this day, people are asking, Oh, you know, are you from Brooklyn? You don't sound like a Brooklynite . You know? And my, you know, our Trinidadian relatives, they call us the Yankee. I mean, growing up, they don't call it anymore. , Yankee, Hawaii, , you know, and um mm-hmm. . And I think about that, you know, I didn't realize until older that I had an accent.
Um, yeah. Yeah. And all of us do, All of us Americans on that were born, I shouldn't say all of us, all of us first generation Americans, we all speak the same. And it's, what I really want to let people know out there is that there's a section of New York City in Brooklyn where many people speak like this.
You know, we need to have some recognition for our beautiful accent and not like where you're from. So
Diane22:26
. Yeah. and, um, they come up with all kinds of crazy ideas where you're from. But , eventually I tell them, you know, So, So let's talk
TrevFM22:36
about, um, one, I wanna talk about the, um, the American dream and the typical American story of immigrants coming to this country and the, the, the, the, the path that they laid for us.
Uh, your mom and your dad. My mom and my dad, they were. Work. They came here with a dream. Yes. And, uh, tell us about that story and how you are benefiting, how you are being, how you are living that story.
Diane23:07
Right. So, um, you know, uh, we, we grew up in the times when like what I call was saying to you, the seventies and then the eighties, and one thing I.
My parents instilled in us is that we are to strive and to, I mean, education, that was the key, right? Mm-hmm. education, they pushed that like nobody business, and, um, they believed that in getting a good education, you could be able to, I guess, capture that American dream. Having gone to school myself, I, I didn't complete totally complete college.
I, I wind up, you know, going a different angle and I had, uh, a, you know, purchased property. I think that's where the direction I went. And, um, and it, I think that was a, a good idea from and not knowing at the time, cuz that wasn't my goal. I'm gonna buy this property and then I'm gonna buy another one, and eventually you, another one.
I, I didn't look at it like that. I just knew that I grew up at the time, You remember when we did move from Crown Heights? We wind up moving into like a multi-family and my dad, and then every, every one of the married kids had apartment, you know, so mm-hmm. , so, so. With that four family thing. Um, I knew at some point when I did marry that, you know, another, and we would go look for our first property.
We wanted a four family or a multi-family. That, and that was our first investment. And then it just went from there to buying another, you know, and one other. So, so it, it was a good investment because now if we were. Rent. Uh, cuz I have four kids. If we were to rent a four, say a four bedroom, , how much will we be paying?
Mm-hmm. , Mr. Bak. , . You know
TrevFM25:18
what I'm saying? Mm-hmm. . Yes. We spoke about this recently as well. Yeah.
Diane25:22
Yeah. It would be very expensive.
TrevFM25:24
And that's a beautiful story that I think many of us who are here now, who came here and who were born here, and your kids and, and our my siblings kids. We are benefiting in a way that generations before from different, um, ethnicities and cultures are benefiting.
We don't realize in a lot of ways that we are the first, uh, in a line of, uh, that that will hopefully be many generations to come. It's one way. I, one thing I do regret is not having, well, not regret, but I do wish I had kids. I just don't know. Um, but that's something that you have. It's not too.
Um,
Diane26:05
so they say abandon be a father at a hundred years old, if that's
TrevFM26:09
the case. Yes. Yes, yes. My father was born out from a older, older grandpa, so. Got you. Hopefully I'll have the, um, but we're gonna wrap it up soon. Uh, Diane, I want to, just to touch on a couple of things. I want to, um, talk about, uh, you and your family and what is it that you're passing down from what you gained from your family?
Um, to them. And in terms of you, you mean we look at you as a person that's a part of the American dreams that's successful. You're buying up properties, you're owning a part of this, um, great American dream, you're grabbing it. Um, what is it that you're passing on? One, I know one of your kids, uh, is an athlete.
Um, but let's talk about a little bit about what you're passing down to your generation, to the next generation. Well,
Diane26:57
hmm. I definitely. The next generation to have. See, at the end of the day, I mean, it's great to have everything, you know, to, cuz I want my kids to achieve, right? You want your kids to achieve, want them to go to college.
Um, if, if, um, you know, get in a scholarship, you know, go to college, you want 'em to go to grad school, you want all the wonderful and beautiful things. That would, uh, you believe that it will make them, um, successful, right? And you say, this will take you to the next level. Then you meet the person that you fall in love with.
That's, I mean, you know, typically, and then you, you yourself then, you know, raise your kids and do the same. But what I do wanna. To, uh, add to all of this is, I, I don't wanna neglect the spiritual aspect of the young person. You know, I really believe, um, and this is what I really dive into, but my children, you know, you can own all this stuff that we, we, uh, want, you know, the one that's good or all these things that could, or, you know, that it, but, but you know, and.
When you're on your deathbed, what is this gonna do for you? So at the end of the day, you wanna make sure the spiritual man is taken care of. I mean, yes. Go get the football. Play football. My youngest son, basketball. Yes. Get the scholarships. Go to, you know, you know my son is an Ivy League. Go to Ivy League.
My daughter graduated from Lincoln University, go do that. My other one going to community college, bmcc. Um, and then the younger one still in high school, yes, achieve, no one said No, don't achieve. But I think in these times that we're living in, it's crucial to, for these, uh, young people, not just have the, the goal set to achieve, but also to have the mindset of something greater than them, a spiritual.
Connection being plugged into something greater than them. Mm-hmm. , because I think that would take them to where they need to go and that see that I'm not gonna even knock on depression and all stuff cuz these things are real things, anxiety and all those things. But I think that could aid in supporting them in while, while they grow through the journey in life.
Because I'm not gonna say God didn't put people to help us. You know, like psychiatrists, uh, therapists, um, you know, People to, if you need to go talk to someone and talk to them. But the point is, I think that is a, a, a avenue to also heal. That's what church is for, to heal the sick and, you know, if you, you're feeling sick.
I'm talking spiritually sick. You go to church. So I really wanna enforce that in them and I hope they could do the same for their children cuz I see the benefits in
TrevFM30:09
it. If I was in church, I'll give you a hardy amen right now. And uh, that's definitely is important, having the spiritual. We wanna make sure we do exist and get through this life for something bigger than ourselves.
And many people will call a spiritual. In many forms and have their own definitions of, of what Spirit Truity is. But um, I think it's important to have something. So Diane Rowlings. Yeah. Thank you so much for coming on. Yeah, the stories are great, uh, bringing us back in time and, um, hopefully you'll be able to join us again, uh, with more stories about New York City and Brooklyn.
It's a common, a repeat. Theme on this show. So, um, thank you for joining us
Diane30:52
today. Thank you. Thank you for inviting me, and I hope to be back again. Thank you, Chuck.
TrevFM31:00
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