How to Get What You Want
Your career isn’t built by waiting for someone to notice your value. It’s built by learning how to advocate for yourself with confidence.
You’ve been told your work will speak for itself. Yet despite doing everything asked of you—and more—you’re still feeling overlooked and uncertain about your next step. Leadership isn’t just about managing a team; it’s navigating the complexities of internal relationships and consistently advocating for your growth.
On Get What You Want, Susie Tomenchok is your silent partner, empowering you with the mindset and tools to negotiate your career—and life—with intention.
Unlike podcasts that focus on climbing the ladder or hustle culture, this show is for women who want to own their careers authentically. You’ll learn practical strategies for everyday negotiations, from asking for what you deserve to confidently handling tough conversations. Because negotiation isn’t just for raises or promotions—it’s how you navigate every opportunity in your career and beyond.
Susie is a negotiation expert who understands the challenges of being in a male-dominated industry and the struggles women face when advocating for themselves. She’s helped countless professionals unlock their potential and will show you how to do the same.
If you’re ready to stop waiting for your career to happen to you and start creating the opportunities you want, hit follow and join Susie each week to build your confidence, advocate for yourself, and finally Get What You Want.
How to Get What You Want
Balancing act of stay-at-home dads and power moms with Regina Hutchinson and Jill Stark
Ever wonder how the dynamics of career-driven women and stay-at-home dads unravel in modern families? Today's episode brings you a fascinating exploration of this topic with industry leaders Jill Stark and Regina Hutchinson. We delve into the transformative decisions, societal biases, and financial impacts of reversing traditional domestic roles.
As Jill and Regina open up about their lives, we gain a deeper understanding of the pressures and liberations that come with such an arrangement. They shed light on the importance of support systems and debunk the myths surrounding stay-at-home fathers, empowering more women to take the lead without hesitation. Join us for this empowering discussion that reassures every listener that they're not alone in seeking the perfect blend of professional success and personal contentment.
In this episode, we talk about the following:
1. The importance of having thoughtful and open conversations about individual and family needs, career fulfillment, and financial considerations.
2. How cultivating empathy, makes leaders more understanding and supportive of the diverse needs of their team members.
3. Recognizing different aspects to find ways to maintain a healthy balance between work and personal life.
Connect with Regina:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/reginahutchinson/
Connect with Jill:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/jill-stark/
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🚀 Ready to Get What You Want?
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📖 Continue Your Professional Growth with These Resources:
Get my Book: The Art of Everyday Negotiation without Manipulation:
www.susietomenchok.com/the-art-of-everyday-negotiation
Work With Me: Speaking, corporate training, and executive coaching:
www.susietomenchok.com/services
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Remember, negotiation is more than a skill—it’s a mindset.
💕Susie
www.linkedin.com/in/susietomenchok
Welcome to the Leaders with Leverage Podcast. I'm your host and negotiation expert, suzy Tomonczuk. It's time to be your own advocate and negotiate for what you really want out of your career, not simply the next role or additional compensation. I want to show you that negotiation happens each and every day so that you opt in and say yes with confidence. Together with other business leaders, you'll learn the essential skills you, as a leader, needs to become that advocate in growing your professional skills, to increase confidence, gain respect and become the future leader you're poised to be, and when you face a high-stakes situation, you're ready, no matter how high those stakes are. So let's do this. Let's lead with leverage. Hey, welcome to Leaders with Leverage. I'm your host, suzy Tomonczuk, and I'm so excited that you're here because you have a treat in store with you.
Speaker 1:I have two of my very I would say closest, very close industry friends, jill Stark and Regina Hutchinson, and both complete rock stars in their careers, and that's what we're going to talk about today. Just to give you a little bit about them Regina had a long career in telecom, worked for Comcast and CenturyLink. She was a division vice president of learning development, went on to become the chief talent and learning officer for Catholic health initiatives and then has stayed in the industry and has done some consulting as well. What would you add to that, regina? What did I miss?
Speaker 2:That my roots were in social work and I've come back full circle to helping and coaching people.
Speaker 1:Oh, tell us what you're doing now.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so I recently retired almost three years ago and now I'm spending my time doing a lot of volunteer work, but I do some consulting on the side and executive coaching with a real focus on helping people through change. That's going on, it's already changed.
Speaker 1:Gosh, you are so well needed in these times for sure. That's amazing, that's great. Jill Stark, also from the telecom industry, had a nice stint at Comcast Cable. Vice president and general manager, went to charter communications for 10 years and did a lot of different roles in sales, business development and left overseeing their enterprise sales division. Then worked for Sprint Wow. So now you're the senior vice president of sales for affinity. Jill, tell us what I missed. What else is notable about your career?
Speaker 3:I think you captured it, susie. A couple of years ago I made a pretty big career pivot and I joined affinity, which is an artificial intelligence provider in the contact center space. It's been a really fun last couple of years doing something totally different to my prior many, many years in telecom working for operators.
Speaker 1:That's awesome. You both are so well regarded, have both served as together actually with WICT as president and vice president, along with other boards and things that you've done. I will say, very well regarded and respected in the industries because of just the leadership that you both had. All three of us were out the other day and we were talking about the fact that you were both the working parent and you both had your husbands that were stay at home all through as your kids grew up. You both said to me I'm sure that that's just the main thing now that it's really acceptable that either men or women are the ones that stay home.
Speaker 1:There's still some general bias around that and I thought it'd be really interesting to talk about now that you guys have your kids are older. Talk about what was that like, what were some of those agreements that you had with your husbands and what made you make that decision and how did it play out for you. Regina, why don't you start Tell us how did you make that decision, where did that happen and what was that like for you?
Speaker 2:Susie, I was thinking about this when we were setting up this podcast on when we made that decision and I almost had to go back. I think it was the late 90s, around 98, 99, when we sat down with my husband and I. I had two young sons at the time. One of them had medical issues, so we were running back and forth to pick them up at daycare and go on a doctor's visits and I was starting to travel. We realized at one point this just isn't going to work. This isn't the life that we want to be leading Back there.
Speaker 2:I looked at some data. I think there was about 10% of stay-at-home dads at that point and, believe it or not, fast forward to maybe five years ago, there's still only about 17%. It's still not a lot of stay-at-home dads Not that it has to be the dad, but the other significant partner of a female who wants to go out there and really pursue their career. There's not a lot of them doing it. It came down to a couple of things. One was just being there for the kids and being able to meet the needs that we had and do it in a way that they would be safe and that we could keep them healthy. The other thing was to really make a decision. Even back in the days, was this financially worth it? We thought we were spending a lot of money on daycare back then. When I meet people today and talk to young females especially and that are out there paying for daycare, I'm just appalled on how they can afford it.
Speaker 2:It was based on that. My brother-in-law, who was old and traditional, was the one that said to us one night at dinner have you ever thought of John as my husband, of John staying home because my career was spouting out at the time? You just making some other decisions and we were like no, no. Then the bulb went off. I had my husband left his job when my kids were, I would say, three and seven years old. It was a big sacrifice. I'm sure Jill will talk about this, because we had to have the discussion that he was going to stop going to work but that the more important job for him was in the home and dealing with the kids. The value of that, which was just as, if not even more, valuable than what I was going to do. But bring home the check along.
Speaker 1:That's kind of where it all began. Yeah, Jill, thanks for sharing that. Regina, I wanted to think about some really fun stories about what that looked like in real life. Jill, tell us about your. How did it all start for you?
Speaker 3:Yeah, it started for me when I received a promotion that required us to move. I was pregnant at the time. If we were going to make this move, something had to change relative to what my husband's job was going to be. Now that I think back on it, I don't know that we actually made the decision that Gary and my husband would be the stay-at-home dad for ever. It was we're moving, you're pregnant, we're both gonna, you know, experience a change. So let's get over and get settled. When the baby comes, all be the caretaker and let's figure it out as we go.
Speaker 3:So we did not have as thoughtful of a conversation as Regina just described. We sort of fell into it because of the fact that, you know, I'd agreed to move, to take on a promotion. But here's what I will say I remember being really anxious at the time and, regina, you probably had the same thing Was my partner going to enjoy it? Was he gonna be resentful down the road? Was he gonna be fulfilled? So I was worried about that and we did talk about that. You know, is this gonna work for you? And but it probably worked for us then because we didn't commit to it longer term. You know, we were probably.
Speaker 3:In fact, if you asked my husband today, he'd probably say, yeah, I thought I was gonna be staying at home, staying at home for a year, and you know, 15 years later, he's still doing it. I do know, though, that not for a minute did I ever lose sight of how lucky I was, how fortunate I was that, first of all, we had that option. Financially we had that option, and certainly there were major sacrifices. We made that go from two incomes to one, but we found a way to do it and I know we were really fortunate to have that as an option. And number two, I also knew that I was really fortunate to have had a true partner that was willing to do the harder job.
Speaker 1:I mean, regina said it was by far, and still is, the harder job, and I just knew then, and know now, that I was so fortunate that I had a partner who was up for it and was gonna be good at it, yeah, and so the conversations like what, if you looking back, what were some of the key moments or the really important discussions that you had along the way to make sure you were in sync and you were valuing the roles of both of you?
Speaker 2:You know, one of them I remember having was just Jill put some great definitions to just how would Gary respond to this. But I didn't want at the time for my husband to be embarrassed or to be thought of as not being the bigger wage earner. And back in even the late 90s that was a big thing Because you know, people saw, you know you both went to work. They just assumed that you know he was making more money and had more of a career pathway in front of them than I did. So kind of having the discussion about how he wouldn't be embarrassed was important.
Speaker 2:But the other key one is I felt like I'm not saying I had to pay him, but we wanted to recognize the work that he was doing.
Speaker 2:And he said to me I remember I'm going to do this, I would love to do it, but I don't want to have to turn to you every time I need a nickel, you know, because I don't have money in my pocket, so to speak, because I'm not the one getting the paycheck, that's depositing it into the bank. And so we made this kind of funny agreement that he had like an open account that he could go take a weekly salary out of when he needed, if he needed it. I mean, I don't even know what he put in, it was like a few dollars, but he never felt like it was going to be about the money and I think sometimes when someone steps back to be the stay at home parent, there's that whole financial just like you get really nervous. How's this going to work out? I want them to feel just as important. It's our money. It was the first time that it's our money really meant. It is our money, it's our savings, it's ours, so it doesn't matter which part you're contributing to.
Speaker 2:I couldn't do what he was doing so he probably could have taken the whole check and I wouldn't even know it because he was the work he was doing so much more difficult, you know yeah.
Speaker 3:How about you, jill? Oh my gosh. I remember one conversation specifically where I kind of got a bit of a reality check, when at that point we had one of our three kids and I got home and my oldest son was really colicky and just cried all day long. And when I got home, gary was standing at the door with my son, like here you go. And I remember walking up to the door thinking, oh my God, I need a break.
Speaker 3:Like I had the most stressful day at work and I was spent. And when I saw Gary standing with with my son holding him up, like I'm about to go crazy, here is your turn. I had to have a moment where I said, whoa, I'm not, I'm not getting a break for me. Like I need to give Gary a break. And after we got Wesley to bed that night, we talked about that and I said I mean, I was honest. I said, oh my gosh, you know I came home with this lens of I've had a really hard day. I need a break. And I see you thinking I need a break.
Speaker 3:And I remember Gary actually got in his car and went off to run errands. He's got had to get out of the house. We had to talk about what we both needed. Gary needed a break from, you know, the kids and I had to realize at that moment in our lives as a young family my break was the kids, you know. That was my turn. So I had to kind of recalibrate how I thought about what I needed and find other ways to get my break that were secondary to giving my husband a break and handling the family. At the time I hadn't thought through that and it was a defining moment for us. We had to talk through it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and like how do you think? I'm very sympathetic to how you had to handle that when you got home. I'm also like thinking about what was it like to be the breadwinner in the executive office when you are probably the anomaly on that side? How did that feel on that side? And what do you do different now that you've had that life experience?
Speaker 2:I had a role model. I don't know if you did, jill, but there was an HRVP that I was working with whose husband the year before had become the stay-at-home dad, and I remember we talked a lot like, just because from the beginning she was like this is what people are going to think it's done with your family, right, and your friends and I'd be like now having their opinions of how this is all working out. But I had a role model that I would use very often to kind of bounce so many of those things off of. I don't know if it was like for you.
Speaker 3:I remember feeling frustrated that and this was, I'm sure it still exists. I felt there was a bit of a double standard in that. Regina mentioned having to travel a lot and I had to travel a ton and a lot of my travel was sort of last minute and non-negotiable on the timing and I never felt that I could raise my hand and say, hey, I'm not going to miss my son's first day of kindergarten or I am not going to miss the ballet recital for my daughter. I didn't feel like I could do that at the time, so I missed a lot.
Speaker 3:But I saw my male colleagues sort of planting their parameters around I'm not available for the meeting, so we can't have it that week because I've got this going on and I think the reflection back in the lesson learned was you have to have your non-negotiables and not be afraid to share what those are.
Speaker 3:I didn't have a role model like Regina at all. So I didn't feel like I had a voice. And you know what's interesting, even as my career grew and I got into more senior roles, I still didn't necessarily feel comfortable saying I cannot travel that week unless I had a reason. That was going to be what I thought acceptable and in hindsight I think I would not, that I would drive the outcome that I wanted, but at a minimum I would attempt to share my thoughts around how that was going to compromise my personal life.
Speaker 2:I wouldn't have been so quiet. Yeah, jill, that's a great example. I remember three years in a row having to travel on Mother's Day to a meeting that was starting on Monday, and it would break my heart, not only for me as my mother, but because I was leaving my mother too and didn't get to be part of that. And my husband's joke was always like well, I'm the mother and the father, so the kids don't even know, you, don't worry, so we'll celebrate another day for you. But it was three years in a row that that happened and I don't think anyone was ever cognitive at the other side that we're asking female executives of leaders to give up such an important day if they are in that role, so that they can be here on Monday morning Right.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah. And I think today, regina, wouldn't you coach someone to say I'm going to be spending that day with my family, I will travel first thing on Monday morning and I'll be there as soon as I can. Absolutely Now that may not be acceptable, but at least you're putting it out there, you know, and sort of trying to control the outcome a bit, versus saying nothing. I didn't say anything most often.
Speaker 1:Hey there, love this podcast. I'm taking 10 seconds out of this episode to ask you to leave an honest review. Your reviews on the show help us to reach more professionals who are ready to lead with leverage. Now let's continue the conversation, and I love the idea of and I think this is true whether you are the breadwinner or you're just moving through your career is deciding what those non-negotiables are and thinking them through and I would even say writing them down, because sometimes you do get hijacked by the motion of this is what is expected of me.
Speaker 1:I remember feeling that way about trips. I was not the only working parent in the house, so I don't have the exact same circumstance, but I do remember feeling like I couldn't articulate my other life, the life that you only saw in pictures in my office, because this is job one and I wonder if that's. I know it's changed a bit with COVID because we kind of all see each other a lot more in our lives, but I wonder if that's still. I mean, I wonder how much of those boundaries people, and especially women, really give up because they haven't really thought about defining those non-negotiables. What do you guys think?
Speaker 3:It seems to me that times have changed, and maybe it is due in part to COVID, and maybe it's just these younger generations being so much more clear on the balance they do want in their lives.
Speaker 3:They seem more confident, which I think is fantastic, because we all know you're never going to get what you don't ask for and what you don't advocate for. So I hope the younger generation, male or female, parent or not, are more confident, speaking up for what's really important to them, because I guess in hindsight that's a regret. I have not being more confident stating my point of view. I don't know, regina, what do you?
Speaker 2:think no. I like the way you said that and I would agree with that. I think that we have made some leaps and bounds, because this generation is a little more. I think they're a little more decisive in saying what they want and what they don't want, and they'll ask. I think a lot more than I would. I think the other thing that has changed is the social stigma of being the mother that went to work. You know, back 20 years ago, 25 years ago, when I was done to do it was pretty out there. It was people who looked at you like why don't you want to just stay at home and be the mother, even if you're going to make more money, right? I think that's gone away too. I think there's a lot of females. They know what they want, they're driving their careers and that stigma of females being able to be out there and really drive a career has changed, which is really enlightening to see.
Speaker 1:Yeah, wouldn't you say. I remember hearing a woman who worked for an advertising agency and she was in a senior position, so she really felt like she had the confidence to set those boundaries and she said that she wouldn't try to sneak out at three and not let people see her, but she would march down the hallway and let people see. So that confidence, because as senior leaders, to also practice what you preach and show others and giving them that confidence, I think it's the obligation of people in senior positions. What do you think of that, jill?
Speaker 3:Oh gosh, I could not agree with you more, Susie. It absolutely sends a message of the kind of culture that you are going to support if you are the senior leader and you are being very clear on what your priorities are. I mean, we all have lives outside of work and it's one thing to say, oh, take the time that you need to do what you need to do, but if no one around you is doing it, people are going to sneak out or they're not going to feel as though that they've got that opportunity. And I think companies nowadays have to be so cognizant of it. Are the senior leaders demonstrating the behavior that aligns with what their values are around? That Because there's a market now for all of these young people, young professionals. They're looking for those types of companies and those environments where we are so much more open to the fact that we aren't just showing up and doing our work and leaving and that the personal and private lives are more integrated.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I was thinking the role modeling of that that you do inside is so important.
Speaker 2:But the benefit at least I know my sons and I'm sure Jill would reiterate this that our children got to see role models of females that were passionate, dedicated, working hard.
Speaker 2:I mean they saw that from young ages, their whole life, and they know that Like I can't imagine they would ever look at a female and say she can't do that job, because that's what they've seen and they've met colleagues of mine and friends of mine and heard the stories that we all talk about at corporate and they know that there's a lot of strong women that have done a lot of wonderful things out there and I think that was just one of the best gifts that that just happened right Through osmosis, right, and not that you can't teach that, but I remember bringing Joshua in one day to one of those take-off work days I don't know if they even have them anymore and he came into the Comcast building and there was a whole bunch of female female sitting in one of the executive rooms and he knocked on. They all said hi, and then I said what do you want to be, josh, when you grow up? And he said I want to be a stay home dad, just like my father, because then I get to meet you all.
Speaker 2:And I thought, put me in him and that's what I mean as well. So I think the role modeling happens in the business, but what our kids were seeing on the outside was unmeasurable.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, you both know that my daughter stays home right now, and her has. I mean, she's not going to be home, she works full time and her husband stays home. And I wonder, as you guys were talking, one of the things is she works full time from home, so she's like you know. The one thing is, when the laundry isn't done by the time I expected to be done, she makes some very strong recommendations. You know so it's. But having said that, I think it's also. I bet you both had to let your husbands run the house and do it in the way that was honoring them. Is that true? Like did you feel? Like when you walked back in, you needed to kind of adapt yourself to the way they wanted to manage the house?
Speaker 3:Oh my gosh. Yes, I have such a funny example that comes to mind. I got home one day and my son was like six months old and, as it is with your first, you know you have a million different cute outfits that your kids have. And for three days in a row I got home from work and my son was wearing the same, like CU Buffalo, like onesie. And on the third day I thought, okay, why can't you put him in a different outfit? He's got so many cute outfits. But then I had to check myself and say you know what it's his call.
Speaker 3:I think I did sort of subtly say oh, you know, he's wearing the same thing again and Gary's like well, of course it's the most comfortable thing he has. But yes, I had to say you know what? This is not my call to make. Gary can dress Wesley how he wants. The weekends are for the cute jeans, you know, and the baseball bat.
Speaker 2:I love that because that was his job and you know it carries over years later. I remember just, I mean, even today I cannot make the shopping list and do it right because you know John has a way of putting what she's going to get weird and an orderly thing and if I write something down on a piece of paper he has to rewrite it all or I can't do the laundry. Like I looked and say I'm going to do a little laundry, no, no, I'll do it and I'm like. So now I'm like just do it all, shop still, you know, do the laundry. But he did that for so long. But back to what you said about your daughter At the beginning it was kind of watching, you know, not stepping on their boundaries as they were doing their jobs, maybe giving a little, a little hints here in the you know, about how they could do it differently.
Speaker 2:But you had to let it go and and it all paid off. I mean because if I ever came home and like food, like meals weren't being made and laundry wasn't being done and shopping, and my husband was a stay-at-home dad, I would have had a nutty. So that was a negotiate at the beginning. This is what you need to be doing. If you stay at home and I'm going out, how you do it is really up to you, right?
Speaker 1:That's good, very healthy. It keeps it. It keeps good partnership. You know to really be thoughtful about that, but I mean we laugh about it, but those are really critical things that you had to really check yourself around. I know we could talk a long time about this, but I want you to think about what, what, what did it give you, like what? How did it affect your leadership, your ability to be an executive? What kind of is the takeaway that that you had because of that decision that you made? How did that impact your, your career?
Speaker 3:I think I mean well, regina already mentioned I feel so grateful that my kids had a role model of a of a working professional mother and a super strong, smart, stay-at-home dad. I love that and they have. My three kids have the most amazing relationship with their dad. That so that is just. I'm grateful for that.
Speaker 3:I think being a a working parent, whether you're male or female, you know how hard it is to manage a family while you're ambitious and trying to have a really successful career, and so I think having lived through it you're just naturally more empathetic, I think, as a leader, to all the people around you, that all have lives outside of work and you know, I mean I'm Marvel and so I'm inspired by single parents single working parents, as I can imagine, and and so I think just having being aware and empathetic of how challenging it is to keep all the balls in the air and show up every day and do an amazing job at work is admirable and you just want to be there to support that in any way you can. Yeah.
Speaker 1:What would you add, Regina?
Speaker 2:No, I love that you just said the relationship that your husband has with the children, because that is definitely one of the biggest gifts. I think that came out of it. You know, and our husbands I think Jill, we've talked about this you know they were the ones volunteering at school when they were mostly females all the air, and you know the coaches and the ones doing the hearing test on hearing test day and all those kinds of things that, and because they were unique in a small percentage of meals showing up for that, they stood out and they got a lot of support. In that the kids really like got a lot out of that.
Speaker 2:The other thing that I was going to just add now I lost my train of thought when Jill was saying this is a benefit, but I would say I think overall we do stress for me and for our John and for our general well-being, because I think if we were both running in and I know, at the beginning of our careers and getting the calls from daycare, you got to come pick them up. He's, you know, he's having an asthma tap or this is happening and knowing who, someone couldn't work the next day because of this that stress would have eventually just kept adding up and piling up to the point that our longer term goals of what we want to do, how we want to retire. I think we would have had to sacrifice a lot of that. So I do think it reduces stress and help the overall well-being at least of all of us in some ways.
Speaker 3:Yeah, good point.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I can say from the other side. I mean, I remember just many times feeling like I didn't have control of that, I didn't have the thread. I didn't have the thread to everything that was going on with all my kids, because it did feel like we were coming in and out and trying to hand off. And so I love that idea, that, that that partnership. Like I'm really envious, thinking back on what a gift you guys, what a great combo partnership that you both were able to really enjoy and take most advantage of. What advice any advice before we go, that you give to people when they are facing this decision? Like, what are the Jill? You kind of said you fell into it. Regina said it kind of just morphs. But what advice would you give to somebody that's listening, that's maybe thinking about this?
Speaker 3:Oh my gosh. I think that whoever is going to stay at home, if that's an option for you, you should be really clear that that's going to be a good fit for the family, for that individual, for your relationship, because there are a lot of people that might not be their best selves in that role and that they could actually be a better parent if they're fulfilled in their career. And so I think it's just probably approaching it the way Regina did and have a really thoughtful conversation about okay, is this a good fit for you individually, for us as a couple and for us as a family, and then financially, and how should it work and how long should it last, and really just approach it in a super pragmatic way, Like Regina did. I got really lucky, it just worked out. I think you have a better likelihood of of success probably if you're really thoughtful about it.
Speaker 1:Love that. Yeah, Regina, what do you add?
Speaker 2:A couple of things that come to mind, joe, though that add on to what you just said is one thing is, I think when you make the decision, or if you sit down to have it, you gotta go into it knowing it doesn't have to last like that forever. If it doesn't work out, you can go back. People go back to work all the time. They may go back into a different career right back in, but it's not a like black and white, that's it and it can never change. So I think that's important.
Speaker 2:I think also my advice would be it's not all rainbows and what do they say? Rainbows and colors. You know Unicorns, yeah, I mean there are things that we left behind. I missed some key things of my kids which were Jill, did I? You know, I even, as I get older, some days and I wouldn't say these were jealous, but I've watched the relationships or discussions sometimes between my sons and my husband and I almost feel like they a little closer than I have to them you know, because they just had this different, unique bonding for years.
Speaker 2:Well, I was away at work, so I think that you just have to be aware and go into it. And then the last thing is you have to recognize your partner in some way. You know, if they need social connectedness so that they not just stuck at home thinking that they left the work because I got so much out of going to work and just talking and seeing people, they have to find opportunities of how they'll get that, whether it be the volunteer and the joining, you know, but you have to do all those kinds of things and find some little they need their little bonus structure to, so to speak. So build that into the plan.
Speaker 3:I love it. Ash, regina is such a good point. All those are really good points. There is you do miss out on some stuff. I remember on a bring your child to work day, my daughter was asked to draw a picture of your parent and then introduce them, and when she held up her picture it was me with a suitcase. Oh, and that I mean that was really hard to see. And so there are moments where you do realize you're missing out, but you know you're just getting through it and you make the most of it and don't dwell on that, because if you were to ask my kids now, they don't remember when I wasn't there, but they always remember when I was there. And so remind yourself, show yourself some grace.
Speaker 1:I think that's such great advice. Oh, you guys, I'm just so grateful to call you both friends. I'm so respectful of you as executives and as such great partners to your husband. So thank you for sharing that part of you Great.
Speaker 2:Well, thanks for doing this, Susie, and I hope it does benefit others that are, yeah, having this discussion Of course.
Speaker 3:Thank you for teeing up the conversation, Susie.
Speaker 1:Yes, and if you want to ask any questions, I'm just going to. I didn't ask for their permission, but Jill Stark and Regina Hutchinson are both on LinkedIn. Shoot them a note. I'm sure that they would love to hear from you, so feel free to follow them and reach out to them. I hope you guys don't mind that I put that out there.
Speaker 3:No, not at all.
Speaker 1:And if you want to hear more, I can convince them to come back. I might take some wine or something to coax them back, but if you have any additional questions or things that I can bring them back, please reach out to me. We really appreciate you joining us today. If you feel like somebody needs to hear this man, woman, anybody that needs to make those really important choices about what they're going to do and having a full career, share this podcast with them. So thank you, ladies, Thank you for listening. Also and this has been Leaders With Leverage I'm your host, Susie, and I can't wait to see you next time.
Speaker 1:Thanks for listening to this week's episode of Leaders With Leverage. If you're ready to continue your professional growth, commit to accelerating your career development and say goodbye to that anxious feeling in your stomach any time you need to advocate for yourself, then get my book the Art of Everyday Negotiation Without Manipulation. In this book, you'll learn the essential steps to take before entering into any negotiation or conversation, any interaction in your day to day. You'll discover what the other party really needs and be clear about what you're going after. You'll bust through your fears and boost your confidence and embrace that negotiation truly happens all around us. Head to the link in the show notes for more, and you can even get a bonus if you buy it today.
