Rebuilding After Everything Falls Apart: Trusting the Breadcrumbs Back to Yourself

If you're in the middle of rebuilding your life, not because you chose to but because life chose it for you, and you're wondering whether you're doing it "right," this episode is for you.

I've rebuilt my life more than once. But there's a profound difference between choosing to blow your life up on purpose and having life pull the plug for you. One feels exciting and empowering. The other can leave you questioning everything you thought you knew, testing your faith, and forcing you to let go of things you weren't ready to release.

In this deeply personal episode of The Femme Cast, I'm sharing what this season of rebuilding is teaching me about surrender, trust, and finding your way forward when you can't see the full path ahead.

We explore the difference between ego-driven desires and true alignment, and why the things we think we want aren't always the things our soul is calling us toward. I open up about navigating fear, uncertainty, financial pressure, and the vulnerability of starting over when it wasn't your choice.

You'll learn the simple practice that's guided me through every major life transition: the Breadcrumb Method. Instead of obsessing over five-year plans and perfect outcomes, we talk about following one intuitive nudge at a time, allowing life to surprise you with opportunities you couldn't have planned for. It's the very approach that led me to creating a Top 5% podcast long before I knew what was possible.

Inside this episode, we cover:
🎤 Intentional rebuilds versus forced reinvention
🎤 Ego versus true alignment
🎤 The Breadcrumb Method for navigating uncertainty
🎤 Leaving room for unexpected opportunities and "magic"
🎤 Practicing blind faith when nothing makes sense on paper
🎤 The Toe Test for low-pressure decision-making
🎤 How to stop overthinking and build momentum
🎤 Redirecting your energy toward what is already working and lighting you up

If you're standing in the messy middle of a life transition, this conversation is your reminder that clarity doesn't always come before action. Sometimes the next step is enough.

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Transcript

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SPEAKER_00 0:52

Hey you guys, what is up? Welcome back to the show. So excited that you guys are here. I'm sounding a little raspy. It's first thing in the morning. So inspiration hit. And so we're going with it. So much to say. Thank you guys so much for the support with the last episode. That was really, that was really hard to put out. I'm not going to lie. It felt very vulnerable. I'm still kind of in the midst of a vulnerability hangover, but I digress. But what I kind of wanted to jump on here and talk to you about today was a couple of things. So we're going to try and see if we can split this out into some logical episodes. So I'm not like just rambling about everything all at the same time. So I think what we'll start with is, you know, like I said in the last episode, I've done my fair share of rebuilds, but this one hits different. And there's a reason for that.

A Rebuild That Hits Different

SPEAKER_00 1:41

The first time I rebuilt my life, which was when I went to Asia, it was, you know, giving a little bit more YOLO kind of vibes. You know what I mean? Like it was like I chose to blow apart my life and start over from scratch. And it's so interesting because I've actually been diving back into that as I've been writing my memoirs and going back to some of the moments that I and reliving them in real time. And it was it was just such a different feeling. Like it was such a more empowering way to rebuild and an exciting way to rebuild because you know I blew up my life intentionally and was like, okay, let's see what we get to create now. Whereas this time around, life kind of pulled the plug for me. Like life kind of like, you know, blew shit up for me. And I'm a firm believer that when we're not aligned, you know, life will do that, especially if there's something that else that we're meant to be doing, you know? And so, you know, this rebuild and it was harder because I didn't choose this. I had a lot of resistance to this. There were a lot of things that I was attached to that I didn't want to let go of, you know, and and that's not just, I mean, that's that's a lot of different things and things, you know, habits, relationships, routines, career choices, like all the things, you know. I think it all kind of uh plays an important part. And I think when we start to, and this is where I always say, you know, we have to be careful when we listen to when we make decisions based on what we think we want. There's what the ego wants and what we you know think we want, which can be very convincing. Don't get me wrong. It can feel like it's an intuitive and aligned decision to say, yep, this is this is where I feel, this is what I feel is right for me, this is where I feel I want to go next. This is where I feel I'm meant to be, this is where I feel like I feel the most, where I have the most value to offer or whatever. But that's not always coming from pure alignment. If it's coming from ego, it could be coming from a place within ourselves where we don't feel like who we truly are is enough. Who trust being

Ego Versus True Alignment

SPEAKER_00 3:56

able to trust who we truly are, what we truly want to do, what we're truly being called into, you know? And it can also come from a place, this is who I need to be in order to feel it, fit and feel like I fit in and to feel good enough, you know. This will prove my worth, this will prove my value if I can accomplish this, right? Then there's the the true underlying slower moving, deeper undercurrent that really, really moves and guides you and says, yes, this is the thing, right? And when we can tap into that, that's when we usually tap into flow and you usually things start to work for us. The problem is we have to get out of our head and into into our heart space and really, really be able to listen on a deep level to where we're being called. And that's not always easy because, like I said, there's a lot of story wrapped up into what the ego attaches to, right? We can go into the different layers, but that would be a whole other episode in itself. But let's just focus on, you know, the fact that you know, my last rebuild, fun, YOLO kind of vibe, just you know, just an amazing story. Like I'm actually so much, I'm I'm really enjoying going back and and and writing about it. I'm gonna be releasing some chapters soon on Substack. So make sure you're following me there. However, now this is hard because again, I didn't choose this, I wasn't prepared for this. I certainly, you know, when I was in Asia, you know, I had a bit of a nest egg to kind of not much, but I had a bit of a nest egg to kind of carry me through those months. But now it's like I feel like I I've literally, I literally don't have like a leg to stand on, is is how it feels right now. And so faith is really being tested in this moment. And I think the scary thing is being able to face that I'm having to let go of a lot of things that maybe don't belong anymore, that don't have a place, being open to seeing where I've been kind of putting my energy and my focus that maybe it doesn't need to be, or maybe I maybe I've been not paying attention to the things that have been calling my attention. Like it's a whole different, it's a whole different type of discovery. It's a whole different rebuild because I'm not just taking steps forward in the directions where I feel guided, I'm also having to sift through all the things that I'm being forced to let go of that maybe I'm not ready to let go of, right? And I'm in this place of feeling like I don't have a leg to stand on and feeling like, but I need to figure out what my next move is, right? So it's a whole different feeling when you're doing it from that, you know, I've decided this is what I'm doing. I'm, you know, I will. It's funny now that I've started saying sharing these episodes on LinkedIn, it's almost like I'm starting to filter like the language I would use because I'm afraid of who's listening on the other end. And I'm like, I used to say this term, I don't know if I should say it anymore. But basically, I mean, it's the difference between going the you know, balls to the wall with the rebuild to like, oh my god, I'm scared to put a foot forward. What if I go, what if I put a step in the wrong direction and it all falls apart or I make a mistake and I have to go back? It's a different, very different vibe. But I know what worked the last time, and I know, and you know, it's scary as it is, I have to lean in and trust that. You know, I really just have to lean in and trust that. Even though it feels scarier this time, even though it's challenging more this time, I really have to remember the principles that I learned when I did this intentionally and apply them here again today. And and and, you know, again, all the fear is there, all the nervousness is there, all the anxiety is there, it's all very, very, very present. What worked the last time that I'm trying really hard to implement again now, is, you know, to not get too in my head about how I think things need to work out or on on the timeline in which they need to work out. It's almost like kind of letting all that go and moving through and making choices literally one breadcrumb at a time. You know, I used to always call it like the trail of breadcomes that life will lead you when it's trying to take you someplace where you may not have consciously thought is available to you. You know, when I started the podcast, like I said, I I shared it on another episode. And if you ever

The Breadcrumb Method In Action

SPEAKER_00 8:58

want to hear the Asia story, the life blow up, that's on the podcast as well. I think it was last year I published it when I blew up my life, something like that, and started over. I think that's what it was called. But anyway, when I I shared in one of those episodes how, you know, when I rebuilt my life after having, you know, done the blow up and you know, getting to this point where it's like, okay, clean slate, where do I go next? Life really moved me through this process of figuring it, figuring it out one little breadcrumb piece at a time. So, in other words, moving out of that mentality of needing to have this whole like long plan, which I know we're always encouraged to do and we're always taught to do. And I'm notorious for having a one-year, six-month plan, a one-year plan, a five-year plan, a ten-year plan. I've like planned everything. So this was difficult for me to learn how to do and to just allow things to unfold naturally rather than you know strategically planning everything. Okay. I strategize. This is what I do, okay, in my other life. So learning to let that go and just be allow myself to just be given one little nugget at a time in the next direction. So how this looks is you kind of drop the planning, you drop the strategizing, you drop the overthinking, and you just go out and you just do something that you love to do. You know, whatever that is, whether it's going for a walk, recording a podcast, I don't know, whatever, cooking something, writing, journaling, uh, you know, anything that feels creative or soothing or nurturing in any way, go and do that, you know. And then trust that you'll get an idea to do something, and then take a take an action on that idea, and then leave it, and then go back to like, you know, fill, you know, filling yourself back up with them back up again with things that soothe you and nurture you and and uh help you tap back into your creativity, right? And then you'll get the next breadcrumb, and then you'll act on that, and then the next breadcrumb, and then that leads to the next breadcrumb, and then that leads to the next breadcrumb. And before you know it, you've unfolded this whole new life that you never even talked about, that you never even thought about, you know. This is how the podcast came to be. Because when I first got the nudge to kind of, you know, start speaking more. I I literally had a vision of myself speaking into an audience, but I couldn't see the audience. I was on a stage, I had a mic, I was speaking. I knew there was like hundreds of people there, but I couldn't actually see their faces. It was just dark. That was literally the podcast before I even knew podcasting was a thing. I think at the time, when I thought of this, podcasting wasn't even, it wasn't even on anybody's radar. It was just something that, you know, kids kids were doing in their parents' basement, you know. It wasn't anything being streamed at the time. It wasn't even it wasn't even something that was on my radar. And then here we are a few

Leaving Room For Magic

SPEAKER_00 12:06

years later, and I have a top 5% podcast, right? Like that is mind-blowing to me. I could not have seen that. I could not have foreseen that. I could not have planned for that. It's not, it's nothing I could I could have put on my goals list because I wasn't consciously aware of it. And I think that's the difference. We need to leave ourselves open to possibilities and outcomes that we're not consciously aware of because they've not been made available yet. We haven't seen anybody do it yet. We don't think it's a thing, we don't think it's a thing yet, you know. The world is changing and it's changing fast. And I think all of us collectively need to stay open to things that maybe we never considered as an option. And so as I'm moving through this period, I'm being forced to do that whole breadcrumb method again and just allow life to guide me and lead me to where it wants to go. That's not to say that I'm abandoning strategy and logic completely, of course not, but I am leaving room open for things to come out and surprise me and delight me and guide me and show me possibilities and opportunities that maybe I never thought of. That was really that was a chapter that I was writing yesterday, actually, about my first trip to Bali before I blew up my life. I think it was the match that kind of got the whole thing started or the kerosene, I'm not sure what you want to call it. Very entertaining. I would say I think that's chapter three, actually. And and that was that was the whole chapter. It was it was leaving room for magic. It was leaving room for life to surprise you in ways that maybe you didn't anticipate. And sometimes when we over-plan and over-strategize and over-optimize, we kill the ability to let life do that for us. And so, you know, staying open to other possibilities that we maybe never have thought of is so key and fundamental. The second thing that has really helped me with these rebuilds is literally just having blind trust and faith that no matter what happens, I will be taken care of. And this is harder to do now, and I'm not gonna lie, this has probably been the hardest thing in all of this is being able to trust and have faith that things will work out. Even though it may not look like it. When the last time before I found before I started working in tech, and you know, this was like the first time, you know, I was really struggling with the business. This was when COVID hit and my dad was my dad had just gotten sick, so my caregiving responsibilities really had just started. It was 2020,

Blind Faith During Hard Seasons

SPEAKER_00 14:50

we were coming out, we were, you know, coming in and out of lockdown. My dad was, you know, in and out of surgery that whole year from starting from 2019. You know, it was a very difficult period for me and for many people, right? And so I I needed, I knew I needed to make a change, but I didn't know what that change was. And when I found, you know, when I started, you know, getting back out there and applying to jobs again. And that was really when I decided, you know, I wasn't, I did not want to do the coaching and the healing full-time. It just it felt to me, I am very entrepreneurial, but it also felt very isolating for me. And I I knew that in some way I needed to diversify it. I didn't know how or what that was, what that was gonna look like. And so I made the decision to go back to work and I started applying to all these places, and for some reason I remembered that I had come across that company before, and I had actually had some interaction with a few people that work there, and they didn't have any like positions that you know really fit what I was looking for. They were very junior, you know, it didn't, it didn't seem like the right fit for me, logically. But for some reason, I kept feeling called to go and work there, or at least reach out, or at least explore the idea. But you know, I fought it, I resisted it, I kept applying everywhere else. But for some reason, my mind kept pulling me back to that. So I finally took the plunge and I said, no, I I think there's something here for me. And and and you know, I followed that and I moved forward with it and I started to connect with people there and booked an interview. At first, the interview did not go well at all, but for some reason, my my brain was telling me, no, no, no, this is the thing. Like you just have to, my intuition was telling me this, not my brain, my intuition was telling me this is the thing, you just have to trust it. And it took a while to unfold, and I just trusted. I was like, okay, it's gonna work out one way or another. This is gonna work out, it's gonna happen, it's gonna be good. Inevitably, it did work out, and I did get a position there, and it was, like I said, very junior, part-time, like the pay was not great, but for some reason I felt like that was the place I needed to be, and I just kind of blindly trusted that. I never moved up faster in an organization for as long as I can remember, and it totally ignited this whole other part of me that really I didn't even know existed, which was this passion for working for startups, for tech, for SaaS, and and and really being able to almost influence and and and and have a say in how you know technology kind of reshapes the world that we live in, because I do believe that technology is doing that, and I do believe that, you know, that could be a good thing or that can be a bad thing. So I do my best to try and make it a good thing. But anyways, I you know, there was this whole other part of me that I didn't even know, you know, that existed, that I was excited that brought that that that brought this innovative, creative side of me to life that I hadn't able really been given the chance to really express before. And so I love that. That was a great experience for me until, you know, ultimately, you know, that ended up coming to an end. And I and I knew it was coming, I knew the end was coming, I knew my time there was done, and I really do believe it's because I was meant to go. I I do believe I was being called to go someplace else. And I think I think the unfolding of that as much as I didn't want it consciously was happening for me and and not to me. So that being said, you know, it was that blind trust and faith that got me there again where I didn't see what the outcome was, when it didn't look right on paper, when it didn't seem to make sense, but I knew that something about you know working there and taking up taking that opportunity was going to pay off for me, was going to bring me to my next step, was going to really prepare me for what was to come next. And so I just trusted that, right? And I trusted in the unfolding and I trusted in what was right in front of me, and I trusted that it would all work out, and it worked out better than anything I could have ever thought was possible. And so, you know, I'm trying, you know, I that is one of the key things that I'm trying to apply to my circumstance today, right? So we've got, you know, breadcrumbs, right? The little crumbs that life leads you, right? Having blind faith that it's gonna work out and that you're gonna be guided to the right opportunities, the right connections, the right people, the right rooms, the right conversations, right? Trust that it's all going to unfold and trust that it may not look the way you anticipated. Okay, because that did not look, that didn't look anything like what I would have chosen. But for some reason, something inside of me was saying, you need to go work here. And I trusted that and I and I moved forward with that. And then the third thing is that, you know, it's like the toe test theory. Nothing is set in stone. You know, you're not marrying any of the decisions that you make. You know, treat it as a toe test. Put one foot forward, take a step in that direction. If it feels great, keep going. If it doesn't, you can make you can make an you can make another decision. You know, nothing is set in stone, nothing is a marriage proposal, okay, for all my non-committal friends out there. You don't need to treat this like a marriage proposal, okay? It's not a lifelong commitment. You make a decision, you try something out, it doesn't work, you try something else. Okay. We have to get out of our head because and I do this all the time. I get into my head and I think if I make the wrong decision, oh my

The Toe Test For Decisions

SPEAKER_00 20:57

God, what's gonna happen? Well, what'll happen? I'll make another decision and it'll be over and done with, right? Like we have this thing that every ever we have this fear that if we make the wrong decision, it's just gonna be catastrophic. Just try and see what happens, right? We have to start moving through life with a try and see what happens kind of attitude, especially when we can't make a decision, you know? You know, what is the worst that can happen, really? And you know, if it's if it's not that risky, I mean, do we feel comfortable making that decision? Is it a bit of a risk? Do we feel okay taking that risk? If so, take it. If not, don't. But either way, we have to just get off the freaking fence and make a bloody decision. Otherwise, life is gonna make it for you. And usually life's decisions are not as gentle as the ones you would make for yourself. Just just saying. But you know, get off that fence, just make a decision, toe test, see what it feels like. Does it feel good? Does it feel warm? Does it feel tepid? Is it like shockingly cold or hot? You know, and just make another decision, adjust the temperature. It's not the end of the world, and we have to stop looking at it like that because we attach, we attach just so much longevity to every decision that we make that we don't realize that so many decisions that we make are temporary. Most of the decisions that we make in life are temporary decisions. Very few decisions that we ever make are life long haul decisions. Okay. Most of them are temporary, some more temporary than others, some you know may stick around for a few years, right? And we're talking about all things in general. Like life in general is filled with decisions. And how many decisions have you made in the last couple of years that ended up That that you know are actually permanent that you're you've still stuck with, whether it's a job or a project you've been working on or a relationship that you're in, or a friendship, or a habit, a lifestyle, whatever. Like, you know, like not everything is meant to be there for the long haul. Sometimes it's just a decision for the moment and it'll lead you to the next one. So get off the fence, make a damn decision, see how it feels. If it feels great, keep going in that direction. If it doesn't, redirect. It is that simple. Simply treat it as data. I'm putting my I'm putting my tech hat on. It's treat it as data. It's not working. We're going to go in another direction. Okay? So yeah. Anyway, take with that what you will. This is, you know, data-informed, evidence-based decisions, okay? All right, I digress. The next thing I will say is just stop with the overthinking. Like, if you can't make a decision, or if you're constantly overanalyzing, you're constantly worrying, you're constantly weighing the pros and the cons and the options that are available to you, stop it. No good decision was ever made by overthinking. Okay. And I know that for some of us, i.e. me, you know, being so strategic, this can be very difficult because, you know, I I need to analyze everything. And so when things aren't, you know, when when when solutions aren't always available or not always present or don't always, they're not always the logical thing, like that last position that I took, or like blowing up my life and going to travel to through Asia for six months.

How To Stop Overthinking

SPEAKER_00 26:32

Like, you know, all those things were very impractical decisions, but they were the right decisions, and they were the right decisions to lead me in the next phase of my path. Right. None of those decisions were made by overthinking, not one. All of them were made by, you know, if I was overthinking, I would stop, I would go, I would do something else to get my mind off of thinking, and then literally the answers would just kind of that, you know, the logical answer would just kind of present itself. And I would be like, okay, I know that's the thing that I'm that I'm supposed to do here. Even though it may not seem right on paper, even though it may not make a whole ton of sense, I know this is the path that I know this is the decision I need to make. I know this is the path that I'm meant to choose, and I'm gonna choose it and I'm gonna just trust that it's going to work out. But those decisions never get made by overthinking. They, those answers, you know, usually when we're when we're struggling to find the answer for something, you know, we're we're we're in our head, we're overthinking, we're overanalyzing, we're you know, we're stressing ourselves out, we're we're not sleeping, we're not eating, like we're just not functioning well as a human being. No decision, no good decision will ever come from that. Because what's happening in that moment is you're literally landing into your fear. You're literally putting your body into a, you know, you're white-knuckling life, you're putting your life into, you're putting your your your yourself into a fear state, you're panicking. You're like you're not thinking, and even if you don't feel like you're panicking, all that overthinking, it's putting you into your head, it's putting into it's putting you into your fears, it's putting into to your conditioned belief systems. And I really do believe that we need to get out of our conditioned beliefs and really, again, be able to tune into something deeper than that, right? And the only way to do that is to stop overthinking. So when you do find yourself overthinking, all you need to, all you need, the only decision that you need to make is that this is not going to get me to the right decision. Period. Full stop. Go do something else, get your mind off it, put on a show, cook a meal, do a workout, write in your journal, talk to a friend, do whatever you need to do. Please don't doom scroll. Don't doom scroll because no, no, no. That's only gonna like create more fog and confusion. Please avoid doom scrolling at all costs when you're going through this. Trust me. And then eventually you'll get the clarity that you need. You will. And and set that intention. I always set this as an intention. I'm gonna get the clarity that I need, but it's not gonna be by overthinking it. It's going to be by taking a step back, taking a breath, taking a break, doing something else, and then I will know exactly what to do. Sometimes I even do this before I go to bed, and I always have a clear answer in the morning. Tomorrow I'm gonna wake up and I'm gonna know exactly what to do, so I don't have to lose any sleep over it tonight. I can actually get a good night's sleep. And I usually have an answer when I wake up in the morning. Don't ask me to explain how that works because I don't have an answer. I just know that it absolutely works. And the last thing that I will say, and this is really the idea that I had this morning for me, and it was scary. I'm not gonna lie, guys, it was absolutely scary. Because the idea that I had this morning was why are you putting so little energy and attention on the one thing that's really working for you right now, which is this podcast, right? And again, makes no logical sense. Like this, this has been a hobby for me, like for years, and I love it. And it's not that I don't love, I absolutely love it, and I absolutely want to grow it, but I've been treating it, you know, as kind of like not as important. I haven't been giving it as much important. I don't want to say it's secondary, but I haven't been giving it the importance and the attention I think that it deserves. So, and it's not about abandoning everything else that I've been doing. It's just make sure you're

Follow What Is Working

SPEAKER_00 30:27

investing just as much time and energy into this as all the other areas that you've been trying to force to work for you. You know, where is energy flowing in your life? What is working that maybe you're not paying enough attention to? Where is movement happening? Where do things feel easy? Where do you feel like when you spend time there, you actually feel energized and you know, alive and and inspired and motivated, right? What are those things that you're probably putting on the back burner because you're trying to figure out all these other things? Like one of the things that always like stuck out for me, you know, whenever I was in a whenever I was in a pickle, right? The first thing that went out the window was my health, my well-being, my exercise routine, my eating habits, right? Because I would get so focused on trying to figure out what was stressing me out, everything else went out the window. But what I didn't realize was that taking care of myself and eating well and eating in a way that really supports me and my mental clarity and my energy was vital to making the right decisions and taking the right aligned next steps. Doing this podcast, getting on here on the mic and talking to you guys, nothing inspires me more, nothing energizes me more. When I get on the mic in the morning, I have energy throughout the day. I think differently, I respond to life differently. And so we need to start paying attention to those things that we're probably more inclined to put on the back burner because we don't think that they're important, when really they are foundational to us making the right decisions and moving in the right directions and having the clarity that we need to move through life the way that we're meant to. Because life was meant to be easy. I don't know if the world taught you that. Life was actually meant to be easy. The problem is we've been conditioned to believe the exact opposite of that. Now, whether that was intentional or not, that's another podcast for another day. But where are you not paying attention to the things that you know are going to make you feel different while you move through life? Even if it is challenging right now, that's okay. You know what? I don't believe listen, life happens. We're always lifing, you know, good stuff will happen, not good stuff will happen. And that is just life, and it's not a reflection on who we are as a person, it's just life, you know, and this is where sometimes I have a real issue, I take a real issue with the personal development community and some of the theories behind that. But you know, what we make of it is up to us, right? And I do believe, I do believe that there's always some way that's shaping us, that it is shaping us in a way that we can't always see in the moment, and we won't see it until it's in hindsight. So that is literally all I had for you guys today. So take what resonates, leave the rest. I would recap them for you, but I can't even remember what I said because everything was so in the moment. So, yes, take what resonates, leave the rest. Let me know in the comments below, wherever you're seeing this, you're hearing this episode right now, what you're gonna take away in action from this episode. I'm really curious. And let me know what you're moving through, like what actually brought you to this episode. I'm curious. You can let me know in the comments. You can DM me on Instagram at thefemcast, or you can email me at Maria at thefemcoach.com and just let me know what's going on. Make sure to join me on Substack. I will be releasing some chapters hopefully in the coming weeks. I I was determined to finish the first three chapters before I started sharing it. So I'm almost there. I am almost there. I'm like probably 75%

What To Take Away Next

SPEAKER_00 34:30

of the way through chapter three right now. So that's to come. If you love this episode, please leave a positive rating and review on the podcast. It really helps this podcast to get seen by other women who, you know, maybe need to hear these messages today. And if you feel called and if you feel guided, please support the show. Everyone who makes a donation will get my simple one-pager three-step practice to really, you know, really start to rebuild your life from the inside out, you know, not being externally guided, but really internally led. And that is the most powerful way to move through any of life transitions, whether you chose it or not. Um, so make sure to consider that if it feels aligned. Okay, that's enough for now, you guys. Until next time, massive love.