ISI Brotherhood Podcast

147. From Chaos to Clarity: The Mental Reset Every Entrepreneur Needs.

• Season 2 • Episode 147

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This week, we’re bringing back a powerful conversation from our ISI Brotherhood Podcast library—one that feels just as relevant and needed today as when it first aired.

What if the clarity you’re chasing in business doesn’t come from doing more—but from resetting who you are at the core?

In this powerful conversation, we revisit the foundational “personal pillar” every entrepreneur must strengthen to build lasting success. For leaders overwhelmed by constant decisions and endless demands, it’s easy to drift into an identity crisis—hiding behind what we call the “mask of success.” When we focus more on appearing successful than being aligned, burnout isn’t far behind.

This episode unpacks the shift from scarcity to abundance—and how gratitude, even in hard seasons, becomes the anchor that keeps us grounded. Instead of reacting out of pressure, you’ll learn how to respond with intention. That’s the difference between temporary wins and sustainable success.

We also explore how success evolves over time. What once revolved around revenue and metrics often matures into a desire for time freedom, legacy, and deeper impact. For many entrepreneurs, faith isn’t something to “add” to business—it becomes the foundation that shapes everything.

Finally, we dive into practical next steps: creating margin for reflection, building accountability, and turning insight into action. Because knowledge alone doesn’t transform—implementation does.

Key Takeaways:

  • Understand the entrepreneur’s identity crisis.
  • Learn how to move beyond the mask of success.
  • Shift from scarcity to an abundance-based mindset.
  • Redefine success beyond money.
  • Create an action plan for a personal reset.

Take a breath. Step back. And rebuild from the inside out.

Connect:

Naming The Storm Entrepreneurs Face

SPEAKER_02

Well, if you want to take your life from chaos to clarity, I want you to follow a few of the principles that we've set out in this episode today. First of all, there's an identity crisis. You've got to rediscover who you are. And after that, there's a mindset shift that you've got to implement and go from scarcity to abundance. And then there's an action plan that we're going to help you with, helping you implement the mental reset. Are you ready to go? Let's dive in. I'm really fired up about this episode today, Chaos to Clarity, and it's the mental reset every entrepreneur needs. You know, I would say that a lot of small business owners out there listening today feel like they're navigating a storm. There's these constant decisions, there's this endless to-do list, there's this pressure to succeed. And I mean, that can be grueling oftentimes. 46 years now, I have felt that feeling. So I can identify with you. I know exactly how you feel. While you're in this chaos, though, it's easy to lose sight of yourself. And we don't want you to do that. We want you to know how important you are as an individual. But what if the key to clarity isn't about doing more, but it's about resetting your personal foundation? Well, in this episode, we're going to dive into the personal pillar of transformation, exploring how to rebuild from the inside out. Hopefully, we're going to give you a few tips today that can transform your life and your business. How's it going, buddy?

Internal Drift And Identity

SPEAKER_00

Going well, big A. This is going to be a fun topic. You know, as I was listening to you talk about the problem, I think this is more common and probably the kind of the standard for folks. You know, this is this is this is the normal default setting for many entrepreneurs and small business owners because we're always in motion. We're always doing stuff. We have these obligations, we have these tasks, we have these responsibilities, we have these visions, and we're relentlessly pursuing this thing called success. But but sometimes we're we're losing touch with why we're doing it in the first place, you know, not just our why, but also just ourselves. And, you know, we've called this this internal drift. We naturally drift towards this state of activity, but but sometimes it's disconnected from the thing that really matters most. And, you know, something essential is missing. And you know, today's episode, we want to just dig, take a few steps back and dig deep and talk about identity and how that clarity leads to greater purpose and impact.

SPEAKER_02

Seth, let's talk a little bit about individual feelings that we and you and I have both had in regards to getting busy and drifting and losing yourself. Uh, can you think of a time, even recently, that that's happened to you?

Grief, Grind, And Loss Of Joy

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I mean, it's it's it's normal to um feel a sense of responsibility. And uh for me, what happens, like I had a business partner die uh in 2023. And I just put on my shoulders this sense that, well, you know, that was horrible. And, you know, I gave myself a whole 12 minutes to grieve. And then I just said, I'm gonna grind and I'm just gonna make it happen, right? And, you know, uh, even though I don't believe it, but my my uh default pattern is if it is to be, it's up to me if I'm not careful, right? And you just you just step into it and carry it. And before too long, we realize, I realize, I'm I'm just not having fun. You know, as a Christian, we're also promised peace, right? We want to have impact, we want to make a difference in purpose, but we're also promised peace. And so that's where I kind of find that disconnect is like, am I really experiencing peace? Okay, what's going on here?

SPEAKER_02

Who first calls you out on that? Is it your colleagues, your peers, your spouse, your children? Like when you get in that, oftentimes it's a blind spot. You don't even realize it yourself.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Who would you say notices first?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I don't think uh anybody externally notices first. Actually, I notice first. And I don't know whether I'm abnormally self-aware, probably not. I just find it the indicator for me, the blinking light, is a lack of joy. It's like I'm just not, and also not looking forward to anything. Like I'm just I'm just kind of grinding, and you know, um it's even if you're making great money.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, but even if you're making great money, that still resonates with you. Like, does that is that a variable? If you're making money or not making money, how fast do you lose your joy when you're really making good money? Or does that distract you, or does is that a not a variable for you?

SPEAKER_00

That is a great question. I think I think when we're making money, um, well, I would I would look at it this way. To me, the the real indicator is overwhelm, personally. Like, am I feeling overwhelmed? And theoretically, if you're making good money, you should be able to hire the resources to solve the problems. And so what I find sometimes is when you're not making money or you don't have the resources, it's just taking on too much, feeling like I've got to carry this and make it happen. And and also the the part that, you know, we talk about this mask of success, right? This that you want to pretend like you have it all going on. So for me, I I tend to throw the flag on myself early and I talk to my wife about it, you know. And uh, but most people from the outside can't detect it, to be honest.

The Mask Of Success

SPEAKER_02

You know, it's funny you said that in uh 46 years I've been small business owner, and I usually talk to Robin kind of last, not first, because I don't want to burden her with the business side of our marriage. Yeah, she probably wants to hear more than I'm willing to share, but oftentimes I use the excuse of, you know, I'm trying to protect her and I don't really want to burden her with that, unless it's a major life decision that we're both need to be involved in making. But you just said something and I don't want to gloss over it. You said the mask of success. And I want to talk about that for a second because I think that's important because I think we all deal with identity crisis. And I think we've got to really discover who we are as an individual. So I think a lot of entrepreneurs out there today are wearing a mask of success. They're really hiding their true selves behind their business achievements. Like, how do we allow ourselves to be true to ourselves?

A Prayer That Changed The Room

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I don't, I don't know that we're intentionally hiding. I think there is a little bit of that because of comparison and stories we tell ourselves about other people's success. I just think that we naturally aren't vulnerable, right? So I don't think we're intentionally hiding and putting on a facade, although that can happen. I just think that we're just we're just carrying the load and we're not intentionally, and I think that's the key word, intentionally bringing other people into the reality, like, hey, I'm carrying the load and I've I've I'm I'm feeling overwhelmed and I don't know how to figure this out. And there's there's a tremendous freedom that comes from that, right? But until you take that mask off, right, nobody can help, right? And and I don't even think we can, I don't even think we feel real until we get to that level of sharing with other people.

SPEAKER_02

Seth, recently there was an event, a private event that was going on here in Nashville at Donald Miller's house. And a friend of mine was putting on the event, Pete Vargas. Pete invited me to come to the event, and I did, and uh there were about 60 people there. And a buddy of mine that lives here in Nashville uh was at the event, and uh Pete asked him to pray uh before the event, and there was a lot of noted people there. I could call their names and you you would know who they are. And my buddy bowed his head and he prayed, and he prayed, Lord, let us not uh position tonight. And he just kind of paused. He said, Let us just really be real, let us not have any mask of success, let us not have any personal desires or ambitions, but let us be real and let us be genuine. It changed the entire uh theme of the night. Yeah, and John Acuff is who it was that prayed.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

And uh we sat across the table from some amazing people, and there was no positioning, there was no mask of success, there was no identity crisis that were going on. He gave permission for everyone to relax. Wouldn't it be amazing today if we could all do that? If we could be in relationship with our peers, our colleagues, our business partners, uh at our churches, everywhere to where there wasn't this mask that you've got to wear. And I I'll just be honest with you, I'm probably hypersensitive to it because I was guilty of it. And some friends of mine called me out on that and said, like, why do you have to name drop or why do you have to let us know? Like, you don't, it's not necessary. And it is so relaxing. And I think it's because I've gotten older. I don't do that near as much. I still catch myself. Now, I'm not gonna say I'm Lily White here, I still catch myself occasionally doing that, but now I'm a self-aware and I catch myself doing that. And I just want to share one other thought around that. It's so much more relaxing now to live that way rather than having this mask of success that I've got to portray that I'm successful at everything I do. And the conversations that I've had in the past decade have been much more meaningful as a result of relaxing that mask of success.

Choosing Intentional Community

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I love that. Well, that kind of brings us to our next point, which is, you know, the value of community. And you said something which was um, you know, what if everybody could have that kind of experience? And the truth is, everybody can have that kind of experience.

SPEAKER_02

They can.

SPEAKER_00

But they've got you've got to be intentional about it. You have to put yourself in the room. You have to go. And then and then that that little prayer that that John did before the session. I don't know if I've shared this yet, but I was I was at a conference a couple weeks ago, maybe months now. It all blurs together. And I was anxious going to this networking event. And as I was walking over there, I felt like this kind of Holy Spirit message in me, which, which was, you need to position like a missionary and not a mercenary. And I, because I was like, I'm gonna go hunt, I'm gonna go make something happen, you know, and feeling some needs in the business, you know. And I was like, no, no, you're a missionary, you're not a mercenary. And and that that's kind of resonates with with what you said there. And, you know, that's one of the reasons I love Iron Sharpens Iron Brotherhood is I put myself in a room of people who know me. They they have context, they know what I'm my strengths, my weaknesses, my proclivities, my history, my desires, to the extent that I shared them and walk with them for years. Whether I choose to pull that mask off and be real and just relax and not posture, that's that's really up to me, right? But the opportunity's there if if we'll just jump into it.

Values As Daily Filters

SPEAKER_02

It's fair to say that the majority of even the listeners to us currently feel in a sense of isolation. And we just want to tell you that it doesn't have to be that way. Obviously, we would love to have the small business owners or C-suite executives that are listening to this to join our organization. We have a remarkable organization. There's, you know, 150 guys in our community that are really sharing, that are no longer in isolation. So it's pretty cool. But how do we align, though, these actions with your values? Like true clarity really comes when actions align with your personal values. I don't mean to put you on the spot, Seth, and I know you do have values in your business, but do you have personal core values written and stated?

SPEAKER_00

I actually do. Um, it probably makes me uh rare because I don't think that many people have taken the time to kind of document them. And I think what matters is that you find some that fit you that that are really interesting. Now, for me, you know, years ago, I had a thought. Um, and it was that what all of us really want is we want to reach for our potential, we want to impact our world, and we want to leave a legacy. And so over time, you know, I clarified that's it, you know, and now I put the lens, and I had I said that to a guy once, and he said something like, Well, if, you know, don't forget God in the midst of that. And it kind of caught, it actually slightly offended me when he said that because I was kind of like, well, duh, you know. But um, you know, it's a good reminder that my potential is defined by God, not by me, not by others, right? Impacting my world reminds me to pay attention to the people that I'm with. That's a really hard thing for me because my brain is, I probably have ADHD, and I have a ton on my plate. And it's very easy for me to be around people and just skip right over them because I'm thinking about a task or what I'm, you know, some ambition that I have. And that last piece of leaving leaving a legacy. And so I've literally codified those things and I know what that looks like in my life if I'm reaching for my pet potential, if I'm impacting my world and if I'm leaving a legacy. And so here's the here's the how. The how is once you're clear on that, it's a great filter, you know, one of several filters that can be used to ask yourself, should I be engaging in this thing? Should I take this opportunity? You know, should I make this investment? Should I form this partnership? Should I, whatever? Right. You you at least come back to, well, what did I say I was trying to do in the first place? Right.

SPEAKER_02

To run it through that filter.

SPEAKER_00

Right.

SPEAKER_02

And it can it can give you the no pretty quick if it doesn't align with your vision and your values. You're like, okay, this is not my original vision. This doesn't align with my values. And yeah, it's an easy no.

Scarcity To Abundance Mindset

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. I wouldn't say it's an easy no because sometimes there's money attached to it. You know, I just got just in the last couple of days, I got invited into a board position that pays well. And I'm kind of like, I'm not sure I want to do it. And part of it is it's a little bit intimidating. And I'm like, okay, well, maybe I should have some courage. The other part of it is maybe it's a distraction and I'm only doing it for the money, in which case that wouldn't make me feel very good about it, right? So I'm I'm I'm praying it through.

SPEAKER_02

What if it's an opportunity to network to help you with your greater vision and purpose?

SPEAKER_00

Exactly. So that they're not, they're not easy no's or yeses.

SPEAKER_02

But I'm trying to give you permission to pursue it if it's of interest. So I don't know. Well, that takes me into really what we need to do, though, that there's got to be a mindset shift. And a lot of people have a scarcity mindset. And what we need is an abundance mindset. And I'll tell you who helped me with this. We have a mutual friend and Dan Miller. And Dan Miller probably helped me more with going from a scarcity to an abundance mindset more than anybody. And embracing a growth mindset oftentimes is hard. Robin and I have made a conscience decision in our inner circle that we are only around people that embrace a growth mindset. If you have a scarcity mindset and you're negative and you're dragging around that wet blanket all the time, yeah, we're probably not going to dinner. And we're certainly not going on vacation, and we for sure are not going in business together. So, how important is it to your family and even your business to embrace the people that you hire, the people that you do business with, um, your colleagues, your peers in embracing a growth mindset?

SPEAKER_00

Well, I think um it's massive. And I tend to think this is hardwiring. I do believe people can change. And I think as a Christian, I believe God changes hearts and temperament, but but some people are kind of hardwired. There was an interesting book uh one time called, I think it's called The Future and Its Enemies. And it speaks about people being hardwired as either dynamists or stasists. Dynamists are people that are trying to make progress and grow and get stuff done. And stasists are people that are trying to like protect status quo and position within, you know, the stated rules. And it's a pretty hard dissection of people, right? But in a lot of ways, you can step back right now and put people in one or other of those buckets. And it is really important that we are around people that give us permission, especially as entrepreneurs. I mean, we don't mind being told not now, but if somebody just tells us no and no and no forever, you know, we get, you know, we get resentful of that. Right. Um, and growth isn't just taking on more tasks. A lot of times, as you, as you're intimating, it's it's personal growth. It's it's willingness to change, it's desiring to grow. And uh, you know, you you you kind of tied that to abundance. I'll I'll kind of throw that back to you. Like, what, how do you flip the switch from being scarcity-minded, especially when things aren't going well? Let's say you're in a season of struggle. You know, that's when I get scarcity-minded, is when I'm like, oh gosh, these four out of eight things aren't working. You know, it puts me in a little bit of a panic mode. Um, how do you stay abundance-minded in the midst of that?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, it's difficult. It's not easy, quite honestly. And it will go back to not to over-spiritualize everything, but I think it is a state of spirituality. I think it's a place that where uh God wants us to live and trust in Him. And oftentimes things don't work out like I want it and things go away. And you're like, well, I thought you had an abundance mindset. Well, I did, but maybe that wasn't what was best for me at that time.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

Redefining Success Across Seasons

SPEAKER_02

Maybe that's not something that's gonna help me achieve my goals and the things where God has me currently. And maybe there's a lesson to be learned, and it's gonna help me in the future with an abundance mindset. And so that's a possibility. Uh, I think it goes back to our total dependency on Christ in our lives, and he knows best, he loves us more. Uh, he knows exactly what we're trying to accomplish, he knows what's going to give him glory. Uh, he knows exactly what's going to detract us from our spirituality towards him. Uh, I don't know the future. I don't know what the future holds, but what I do know is I want to walk in obedience each and every day, serving God. And oftentimes the things that I think are abundance that I would have more of would take me further away from him. Yeah. So I think that kind of leads me into the next thing that I want to discuss is that's kind of redefining success for each person. And I didn't realize this until probably the past 20 years, is my definition of success changed. And it changes over time, right? Depending on the stage of life that you're in. But currently for you today, Seth, like how do you even define success?

SPEAKER_00

That's a great question. I'm I feel like I'm a teenager, and that'll sound weird because I'm 54 years old. But in it as a as a teenager, you're in this awkward transition between, you know, uh being a child and being an adult, you know, called adolescence. And in some ways, uh, you know, there's a great book. I may have referenced it, maybe not, David C. Brooks. Uh, it's called Strength to Strength. And he talks about how you change as you get older. And, you know, we've got to realize that it's it's happening to us, and we have to get be on board with that. That's like that's a natural process. We have a fluid uh intelligence when we're younger, and it becomes a crystallized intelligence as we're older, and then we need to embrace the role of being a mentor. So the short answer is, you know, redefining success really is personal, and it's how am I using my gifts to glorify God? Right. I didn't get all the gifts, I only got a few of the gifts. I'm not going to be asked, I don't think, about your gifts. I'm going to be asked about my gifts and my opportunities, right? And, you know, so that's a a filter, but probably the biggest one for me personally is when I get in a funk, when I get overwhelmed, you know, we want that clarity. But for me, one of the exercises that really helps me re-establish is gratitude. Because gratitude reminds me I'm not holding the world together, that I'm the recipient of a lot of really good stuff. And if all of that is true, now I can respond instead of chase, I can respond. Right. And I think if I were to put my finger on part of the issue for entrepreneurs is that we're just chasing. We're working hard, we're chasing, and we drift away from all that matters. And then gratitude kind of reorients us to, oh my gosh, I I didn't pull all this together. I, you know, somebody else did.

Faith And Work As One Life

SPEAKER_02

It takes some time to pause to kind of reflect back on that. And when I think about success early on, I thought it was really thinking about solely financial gain. It was like, man, I want a two businesses and I want recurring revenue and a big real estate portfolio. And it was all about that. As I've gotten older, you know, it's more about time freedom. It's about leaving legacy, uh, is more important to me now. So it kind of shifts as as time goes on. So what I want to say is embrace the change in regard. To your outlook on what success is. Yeah. But really understand that we need to find fulfillment beyond monetary achievements. Whatever that is for you, that's what I would suggest that you take a look at. Now, I was asked recently on a podcast interview. This guy had me on and he said, I know you talk about your faith a lot. And uh what if I don't allow that uh for this podcast interview? And I stopped for a second. I thought about it. I said, I won't do the interview. And he started laughing. He said, Well, I'm a believer also. I was just testing you. I just wanted to see if you were willing. What is the role of faith in your business today, Seth? Like how do you look at it? And there again, not to over-spiritualize all of our topics, but it is vital. It is very important. And I think integrating our faith into business practices, it really provides a strong foundation and a guide for all of our decision making. So it's not, I think they're inseparable. Let me say that. I don't think it's integrating faith into our business. I think they're inseparable.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, no, I think the way I look at it is uh business gives us an opportunity to express, right? It's an expression, it can be an expression of our faith. But to me, that's gonna be very inauthentic if if it's not personal first. And to me, it it's it's it happens in the quiet moments, it happens in when I'm feeling overwhelmed, when I have things that are stressing me out. Will I surrender those things to the Lord personally and go to the Lord? Because actually, I think that the Lord will allow circumstances in our businesses, in our life to push us to that point. You know, I think about that.

SPEAKER_02

Crossroads, you got to make a decision, right?

SPEAKER_00

That's Psalm 32 that says, I'll guide you and instruct you, only do not be like the horse and mule, which must be controlled by bid and bridle. Meaning, hey, we can do this the easy way or we can do this the hard way. I actually think God uses this is probably the better answer. God uses business to shape us just as much as he uses our faith and our business to impact others, right?

SPEAKER_01

That's good.

From Insight To Implementation

SPEAKER_00

You know, I think our business often they are the crucibles that test us. And, you know, we have to decide are we gonna tell ourselves that we're gonna gut it out and make it all happen, or are we gonna surrender again our kingdom to his kingdom? And so to me, I think I'm a little bit more in that bucket. I tend to work with a lot of a mixture of people that are faith-oriented and people that aren't. I have clients that aren't. Frankly, sometimes it's hard to serve clients well when I'm just like, wow, all I'm doing is helping rich people get richer. That's not very motivating. But sometimes I have to remember, no, my job is to be a light and to serve well. And outcomes are not my own, right?

SPEAKER_02

You know, let's talk about the action plan a little bit. We've talked about these things, uh, the mindset primarily, and what do we do? Uh, how do how do we implement kind of a mental reset? And I started thinking about all the things that guys read, the podcasts that they listen to, the books that they read. Like knowledge is useless, though, without implementation. And I tell people the only difference between people that can't read and the people that read that don't implement, right? There's not much difference. And so what do we do with the knowledge that we have? How can we create intentional uh activities or routines or kind of set the tone for a productive day? What do you suggest that people do with these things that we're teaching?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I think the first is you have to create space to actually wrestle with them and think. One of the problems that I run into and I see with other entrepreneurs and business owners is we just go. You know, we'll prioritize physical exercise, right? And, you know, routines over, no, I just need some space.

SPEAKER_02

Right. Just some white space to think.

SPEAKER_00

Just some space to think and uh to to ask those bigger questions. What are my gifts? How am I using them? What's my level of joy? How's my marriage? All you know, all these things. You know, yeah, you're gonna get to financial and you're gonna get to business, but to me, the key here is taking a taking a step back, asking yourself what's what's really important. So to me, you have to have a discipline of doing that. It doesn't have to be a quarterly retreat, but it it should be or it could be, right? It doesn't have to be an hour every morning. Perhaps it should be, but you have to have some time where you're intentionally measuring reality against what you hope for.

Do We Need Accountability

SPEAKER_02

You know, two years ago, I took two months off. Uh, I completely unplugged from the business, social media, the phone. I went dark for two months. And when I came back, it changed the format of our entire business because I had time to think deeply. We don't realize how shallow we think until we have nothing else to think about. And it allows us to go deeper, to meditate, to pray, to read scripture, to just listen. Some of the most profound moments in my personal Christian walk is not when I'm praying, but when I'm being quiet, silent, and still. Yeah. And so for me, that's that's paramount. But think about how you can implement these strategies in your personal life. One of the things I was sitting on the sofa night before last, and I was kind of preparing some of these notes, kind of thinking through some of the things that we were going to talk about. And the thing that just popped up in my mind that we really need, or I need, or maybe we don't, that's what we're gonna talk about today, is accountability. And David Landreth, a pastor of mine 20 years ago, really introduced me to accountability and we met weekly with six other guys, and we did that for about seven years. And then after that, I enlisted three other guys and we meet weekly. We've done that over two decades now, every single week. And it's a topic that we talk about within the brotherhood now in Iron Sharpens Iron, is having a trusted group or a mentor that can provide you guidance and kind of keep you on track. But when Robin was in the den night before last and we were talking, I said, I just want to ask you a question. Do we all need accountability? And her answer really shocked me. I started once to bring her on the episode today and we could talk about it. But her answer was no. And it really shocked me because I've been so involved in accountability. Uh, and she said, Well, first of all, you've got to really define what accountability is. And so we talked through that, and I looked up uh from Webster and uh thought through it, talked through it again with her. And it's the acceptance of responsibility for one's actions, decisions, and behaviors, and the willingness to be answerable to others for the outcome. And when I started talking to Robin about that, I said, So you're telling me you've got all the answers and you don't need any accountability. She goes, I didn't say that. I'm just saying that if you're disciplined in certain areas, I don't think we need accountability. But if there was an area I was struggling in, I would welcome the accountability because I want to get better. And so the need, the key word there was need. Do we all need accountability? So, what are your thoughts around accountability?

SPEAKER_00

I agree with Robin.

SPEAKER_02

I was afraid of that.

SPEAKER_00

I wanted to be on my side in this conversation. Yeah, well, I I'm I'm smart enough to agree with Robin. Um, I think that um there there's an interesting thing here. So I I would I would frame it this way high performers need accountability. I don't think you need accountability at a baseline, meaning, because I actually think there's kind of this tension between personal agency, which is I know I'm going to be held accountable by God. Right? Ultimately, ultimately, right? Yes. And I know I'm responsible for my actions and the results. So that's already a fact. I don't need an external party to make those things true. They're already true. Okay. But I think I'm invited into accountability, and accountability is actually a gift through the lens of performance, right? And I also think that there's uh maybe another side to this too, which is if you're struggling. If you're struggling with alcoholism, you know, many men struggle with pornography, many men have all sorts of habits that they're like, hey man, I'm just I'm just not able to get this whipped on my own, then yeah, you do what it takes. Right. Um, I think people are better with accountability, um, but it's it's it's a little bit uns unspoken. I think it has to do with the people. It's it's it's not a it's not a formula because it's it's it's there's as much variation in what accountability looks like as there is variation in personalities, I think. Um but that's my that's a great point.

Trust, Mentors, And Growth

SPEAKER_02

I I like what you just said uh related to that. Um my position has become over the past, we'll call it decade or maybe a dozen years, is that I genuinely want to get better. So I've dismissed the mask and I've dropped the veil. And I want to be vulnerable and transparent because I want to get better in certain areas of my life. And so I welcome the accountability. I'm willing to subject myself to the scrutiny of others to help me see the blind spots that I can't see so that I can get better. I don't want to stay in that constant state of, you know, the kryptonite and the blind spots. And like, so I'm willing to take the accountability. I offer myself up to be held accountable so that I get better. When I thought about some of the elements of accountability, one is just responsibility, kind of taking ownership of your role. Yeah. The next one is transparency. It's like being open about your progress, being open about your challenges and being open about your failures. And then answerability, being willing to report back to someone, whether it be a mentor, a group, or a team of people, it's like being willing to show up and say, hey, I'm here to show myself accountable. And then for me, the element that's most important is kind of being growth oriented, like using that feedback and accountability, not really as a punishment, but as a tool for growth.

SPEAKER_00

Well, and and speaking of the punishment side, that's because you have trust with these people. You know they love you. Like one of the things I teach around mentoring is a mentor is gonna love you. And what that means is they're in it for your benefit. You're willing to be open and honest with them because you know that these peers, right? They they love they love you. And so somebody having context to know you and then also having trust is a kind of a prerequisite for that kind of accountability. But you want it because you want to, you know, you want to improve, you want to grow.

Resource: Scott Beebe’s Framework

The Personal Reset Playbook

SPEAKER_02

Hey, I want to do a little throw out real quick for one of our members, Scott Beebe. He he's a mutual friend of yours and mine for a decade now. Scott uh teaches people how to get out of chaos and really get to a sense of clarity in his business. And it's called My Business on Purpose. And uh he wrote a book that's amazing. It's called Let It Burn. And I highly recommend it. Highly recommend Scott Beebe. He's a phenomenal guy. And if you want to get your business out of chaos to clarity, highly recommend. We'll put his uh email address and his website in the show notes, and you can go there and check out Scott. He doesn't even know I'm recommending him, but he's a phenomenal guy. Listen, as we kind of close out today, I want you to really think through how you how you rediscover your identity. There's too many entrepreneurs out there today that are wearing a mask of success. They're performing for applause while holding their true self back. And I really don't want you to do that because clarity begins by pulling back the mask first and engaging with authentic community and aligning your life with your personal values that you've established. Then you got to shift your mindset. You're like, man, how do I do that? Well, growth doesn't happen without intention. And when you redefine success through the lens of purpose and not performance, this happens. And if faith is central to your life, it should become central to your business as well. Then finally, as we've just talked about, implement a personal reset. Knowledge is only potential power. Without these daily habits and accountability and regular reflection, even the best insights are wasted. Growth requires structure and follow through. And if you want to really get out of the chaos into clarity, these are the things that you have to do. Hey, thanks for being here with us today, and we're excited to see you next week.