Welcome to Real Talk with Reginald D. I'm your host, Reginald D. On today's episode, I have Tiffany Owen. She's an author, a life coach, a mindset fitness coach, and founder of TOl Fitness. Welcome to the show, Tiffany.

I am so excited to be here. This is awesome. I'm honored that you've had me on.

Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you. So what inspired you to start Teal Fitness?

Before I dive into that, I think it's important to remind listeners to give your podcast a review and share it because I know you're on a mission like me to help people and to get this out. People forget they listen to what we're doing and they forget to like and share and all the things, which helps us help more people. So I always like to remind listeners to do that before I dive into talking about me. So please do that. All right, so you can spread Reginald's mission. Now, what was your question again?

I forgot. So what inspires you to start TO Fitness?

Okay, you're going to have to bear with me because I get really excited when I talk about this. I've been in fitness for over 20 years. I'm a wife, I'm a mother of four, but the woman that you're talking to today is not the same woman I was two years ago. Two years ago, a little over two years ago, I tried to kill myself for the fourth time. And even though I looked like I had it all together, I was coaching thousands of people, helping people. I had some unresolved trauma and a drinking problem that led me to try to take my own life. And hitting bottom was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. And to go back to your question of why did I start this, God saved me and allowed me to go through some things that now my pain is my purpose. And fitness is just one of the tools that I use in my holistic approach to helping people or empowering others to be radically transformed into the person that God created them to be. And that's why I started this particular fitness and mindset coaching business was because I had to turn my pain into my purpose. And I believe that you don't get to keep a gift unless you give it away. So I had to share with others what has helped me radically transform.

Wow. Wow. That's amazing. That is amazing. And you mentioned about, you know, being at your lowest point. I've been there before. I was suicidal myself at one point and it's tough, but when you're at your lowest point and you hit it on the head, you said that was the best place you could be at that time. You're more, I say you're more calmer, you listen more, and you got nothing to lose at that point, you know, things like that. And I've overcome a lot of situations like that, you know, in my life. And I think that was the thing when it was all I had was God, that's all I had, you know, at the end of the day.

Yeah, rock bottom is a good place to be. And most of us fall into the trap of life happens to me instead of for me. Right. So we become a victim and we tend to stay in that victim mentality, which keeps us stuck. And That is what I help people with. There's so many. I mean, I wonder how many of your listeners are thinking, gosh, I just can't catch a break. Why does this always happen to me? Like, that's just my luck, right? That's where I was and that's where so many people are. And those are the people that I want to help because I believe you're most qualified to help the person that you used to be.

Exactly. So let's talk about fitness for a minute. People look at fitness so many ways. But fitness is really, really one of the most powerful things on this earth, I believe. So what role does fitness play in your life on the physical and mental side?

Yeah. First, I became a personal trainer at a gym over 20 years ago. I'm 43 now. And exercise and fitness, thank God, it's who I am. And I think that's the biggest part. It has to become who you are. And I truly believe you have to transform your mind and then your body will follow. So even though exercise and fitness is such a big part of becoming the best version of yourself, if you're not transforming your mind along with that, your body probably won't change. So it's a non-negotiable, right? Successful people don't negotiate the price of their dreams and their goals. And it is who I am and it's what I teach my people, my clients. That's what I want for them. I want it to become just who they are. They work out. They're a person that works out and they love to take care of their body.

Right. Because I have a best friend back home, we grew up together, and he works out a lot, you know, in shape and all that stuff. But I asked him one day, I said, man, you work out all the time, man, what's going on, you know, just shoot the jive with him one day. And he told me something, and it really stuck out to me. He said, man, I don't, he said, you look at me, he said, I don't work out for the physique. He said, it's for my mental health. He said, that's the reason I do it. He said, I don't do it. He said, if it wasn't for my mental health, he said, I wouldn't be working out.

Yeah. And if you find a person that that's who they are, and it's just a part of their life, most of those people will tell you that. I do this. It's like medicine for me. You know, and it is the best medicine, just having more lean muscle, having a healthier body, increases serotonin and dopamine and all the happy hormones that we look for in things that are not so good, like alcohol and drugs and Netflix and, you know, shopping. We can get that in a healthy way through taking care of our bodies.

Absolutely. So Tiffany, you have a book called Wounded to Warrior. Can you tell us a little bit about the book?

I can. God put it on my heart long time ago to write a book, but chapters just kept happening. I'm like, oh, that's another chapter for my book. I wasn't ready. But after I got to go to treatment, a little over two years ago, I knew it was time to write my book. And Wounded to Warrior, the subtitle is How to Participate in Your Own Rescue. So it's all about, it's my testimony, but it's solution based. So it's personal development with my story to inspire those who are struggling. And my story includes PTSD, sexual abuse, physical abuse. I was married four times by the time I was 29. Prescription pill abuse, alcohol addiction, mental health struggles. I found out my dad wasn't my real dad when I was 29. I was conceived by an anonymous sperm donor from a sperm bank. Again, things just kept happening to me, right? So I've been through just about everything that you can imagine. I wrote the book, not just for my own healing, but to inspire those that are struggling in silence, that there is hope. So it's solution-based. All the tools that I use with my coaching, the mindset coaching, they're in my book. And when someone reads it, they will finish feeling equipped to dig themselves out of the hole that they may be in.

things and I can tell with you is that your life and your testimony is powerful. It's something that God's going to use or has been using to break barriers and things like that because you know it's nothing like somebody who's walked through it has been through it. I mean you can talk to me all day about being a millionaire if you've never been one. I'm not going to really listen to you. But that's amazing. That's amazing. So what mental roadblocks do you see most of the time with clients and people you're training and coaching and things like that? And what ways, too, can people reframe with limited beliefs and limited mindsets?

I've coached thousands of people over the past five years. Most of them are women, and I'm sure some of your listeners can relate that I'm too busy. I'm too busy. I don't have time. the lack of self-worth, the lack of confidence. So many people get caught up in doing things for other people that they don't follow through with the commitments that they make to themselves. They have gotten themselves into a position of being overweight and unhealthy because that's a symptom of something that just hasn't been healed and acknowledged yet. When people sign up with me, they think they're going to get a workout and they do. My workouts work and you can do them from home, like with minimal equipment behind me. You don't have to go to the gym to do my workouts and they work, but I do not do fitness coaching without the mindset coaching part. So when they come to me with all the reasons they can't or don't have time, if you fight for your excuses, you get to keep them. Right. So when I bring them on and I say, I will not give you a workout if you don't do work on your mind. So they come to me and we couple of different ways. that we break down the negative self-talk and the limiting beliefs is, and this is in my book, I have them create a new narrative. So we're always having a conversation with ourselves, right? So what we think about, we bring about, what we focus on grows. And if you find an excuse, or if you're looking for excuse, you'll find it. So we start in the very beginning by getting out all the limiting beliefs and the negative tapes, and we flip them into what if the opposite were true. So I have them create what I call It's more than an affirmation paragraph. It's like a declaration paragraph. So we have to replace the old with the new to create new neural pathways in their brain. And so they have a new narrative. And that's something that I have my clients write and I write. my paragraph every single morning and I have for years. And it's amazing the confidence that comes out of these women that I coach and how their life is transformed with these new mantras and these new tapes. We still have bad days, but the valleys and the lows don't last as long. So the paragraph is one of the things I use, but the too busy and the not following through with the commitments that they're making to themselves is the biggest thing that we have to navigate through.

Yes, that's special. That's special when you can actually get someone and teach someone and get them in the right mindset before you get into the training portion of it. I think that's very critical. And I think that's longstanding too. And a lot of people won't feel defeated or feel bad for themselves with the quitting and all that kind of stuff. So I really like that.

Well, and think about too, How many people listening want to go to the gym? They want to love themselves. They want to know how to work out. They want to know how to take care of themselves, but they don't know how. They don't know where to start. The longest road that you'll ever travel is between your head and your heart. I wanted to love myself. I wanted to love myself the way God loved me internally, but I had no idea how to do that. I had no idea. Now I have tools, actual tools and action steps that I can share with my people that will get their head and their heart connected and they'll learn how to find self-worth from within and not externally.

Right. I really like that. I really like that. So, because a lot of times I feel, you know, people talk about the burnout a lot. You know, everybody just day and time, everybody's busy and things like that. But I always say to people, you can't give yourself a pass. You can't give yourself an excuse. You keep giving yourself a pass, you're gonna keep passing. So I just believe that when you look deep within yourself and look at what's important, you'll start shedding some of that other stuff you're carrying. You shouldn't even be carrying every day and lighten your load, you know?

One of the things too that will be helpful for your listeners, a real practical, just first step that they can do is create what I call a power promise, right? So a power promise is one thing that you can do even on your worst day. This is how we build confidence. This is how we build integrity with ourselves. Because most of the time, the reason people don't follow through or they are starting over every single Monday is because they don't follow through with the commitments that they make to themselves. They don't have integrity. They don't have integrity with themselves. And by creating a power promise, that can start the cycle of having integrity with yourself. And we make it very, very simple. It could be brushing your teeth. It could be, you know, drinking so much water, making your bed, something very simple to learn how to build integrity, you know, with yourself and not negotiate. So having a power promise is really another first step in learning how to follow through with the commitments that you make to yourself and keep it simple. And then once you get that one established, then you make another one and another one. And so you habit stack and build on that, right?

That's very wild. I bet your community is like on fire, man.

They are. They are. It's like going to church when we do these group Zooms.

Awesome. That's the way you want it though, right?

Yeah. Yeah. And that's the big part too. I'm glad you brought that up. Community and accountability. Most people, when I say what's missing, if it were present, would make you successful. And one of the number one things is accountability and then a plan. Like they know what to do, but they don't do it. So they want someone to tell them what to do. If someone would just tell me where I don't have to think about it and then time, that's another one too. But the community aspect of what I've created is pretty incredible because when you sign up with me, you don't just get me, you get a whole team. I've got mindset mentors on my team that run small group accountability Zooms. I have people who've been with me over a year. They'll take on the new clients that come in and they'll partner with them and we share our wins with each other every day. There's levels of support, so it's really cool. I don't want to take it all on myself. Like I want them to have multiple levels of support. So that's what they get when they sign up with me. I don't want them to be dependent on me. I want them to be empowered and I want them to connect and community and build relationships with people. So the community aspect of what I do is huge.

Yeah, I believe that a real leader, if somebody who takes on a responsibility that God has given someone such as yourself understands that you have to empower people to go to the next level. It's not just you carrying the whole thing. Some people I see is like that for some reason. They don't want anybody to maybe outdo them one day or maybe whatever the case may be, but I feel like if I can't empower someone and take them to another level and another level, I don't feel like I'm doing what I'm supposed to do.

You're not. Yeah, and I think in the beginning, not I think I know, I was guilty of this because it was making me feel good to rescue people and rescuing someone is not empowering them. And I fell into that trap thinking, well, I'm helping this person. So I've got to answer their text immediately. I need to, you know, um, be there all the time. Well, I have four kids and I'm only one person and I have a husband that is very important to me, but I was trying, and that's what kind of led to my breakdown in my coaching before, because I was trying to be the savior to everyone, which my payoff was, it was making me feel good about myself. So I had to give up that control and ask myself, well, my mission is to empower others to be radically transformed into the person that God created them to be. What does empower mean? Empower means that they are doing it on their own. they don't need me, that's what I want. I want this to become who they are and them have the tools, but I'm gonna give that, that's why I say, I'm like, I'm gonna give you the keys, but you have to drive the car. But I was definitely guilty of that before.

Exactly. I was the same way years ago. And I just call it taking on projects. I'm just taking on projects with people. And it's like, man, and I got, like you, burnt out. I mean, it was crazy. And I never thought about it. I used to hear people say, I'm burnout and I'm this. And when I think about someone being burnout, I think about me being raised with a single parent, you know, single mom, and she worked three jobs, going to college and playing for seven wives in the church at the same time.

Yeah.

I saw her get burned out one day. That's right. Right. It's tired. But like I said, you can mentally get burned out. Like you say, taking on all these, I call projects and things like that, instead of saying, Hey, let me empower this person. to get done what they need to get done in their life. You can give them the keys, but they got to drive the car, right? I like that.

Yeah, I love what Wayne Dyer says. He says, we all have to take responsibility for everything in our life. And I talk about that in my book, and it can be kind of controversial. We have a part in everything. And even as a victim, I had to own my part in every situation to get my power back. So what Wayne Dyer says is responsibility means to respond with ability. When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. I'm not giving the people who abused me a pass, but if I can take responsibility for my part, like I shouldn't have been blacked out drunk, maybe, you know, that was part of me getting raped. Right. Not giving them up and that I can really make some women really mad. But if you look at what I'm trying to do, I get my power back. If I can say what my part was, it's kind of going a little bit of a different direction. But I just feel like I need to share that. Right. So I had to take responsibility for. spoon-feeding people, which was not doing them any good, but in my heart, I really thought I was rescuing them. But I wasn't, because I was not equipping them.

And I think it's really important when you think about this, and picking back on what you just said, I think it's so important when you look at the part we played that could have made this thing different, or could have made it worse, or whatever the case may be, or made it happen. So I mean, I tell people a lot of times, and one of my biggest things, and I talk to people, I said, man, you got to handle every moment in your life. You got to handle it right. If you handle your moments, it'll get you to your destiny. But if you get to your moment and you don't handle it right, you're not going to get there. I mean, you get set back after set back. And that comes with just being responsible and owning up to stuff, you know?

Yeah. I was about to ask you, so what is right? Like, do they, when you tell someone that, what do you mean by that? Just cause I want to get your feet. I know what you mean, but I just want you to define that. Like you have to do like, right. What do you mean?

Right. So a moment can be good or bad. I tell people, you have to make the best decisions in that moment, whatever comes your way. That's the only way, because once you make the best decision you can make in that moment, nine times out of 10, it's going to get you through the moment. I feel like a lot of people, and a lot of people I've actually led and things like that, that I couldn't get the knee-jerk reaction kind of thing out of them. They were so emotional. And I was like, no man, no, as leaders, we can't be like this. You know, we've got all these people we lead, you got to tighten up. You got to understand, okay, this is the moment we're in. You're coming to me with something, what are we doing? What's the solution? Brain solutions. You know, don't just talk about it and dwell in it. What's the solution, man? We got to move on.

Yeah, yeah. And that kind of goes back to what I believe with doing the next right thing. But to be able to trust yourself, I think we have to get all of the junk out of the way to be able to trust our discernment and intuition. That helps you make the right decision. Because I have a lot of clients, and maybe somebody can relate to this, they don't trust themselves. So they might not know what the right thing is because they're questioning everything in front of them. Right. And then they research everything because they haven't learned how to like trust the Holy spirit, the voice inside of them. But I think that comes with taking care of your body, taking care of your mind, what goes in comes out. You can't give away what you don't have. Not drinking. not using drugs, not abusing anything. When we clean that up, then it's easier to do the right thing. Would you agree?

Oh yeah, most definitely. Because if you have so much stuff inside of you, you can pull from anything inside of you. You know, when you get, like you say, the junk out of the way, you can't pull from it because it's not there. You know, all you've got is the good things that you have. But you said one of the critical things, and I operate on this, so the Holy Spirit. You know, people sometimes look at me like, man, something happening, you just say, do this, do that, do that. And it's like, then I said, man, I just have a discernment, I ask God to guide me, you know, every day before I walk out my door, you know, I mean, pray contentional with my family, and then I'm on my way. So I trust the Holy Spirit within me. So when I make a decision, 9 or 10, it's going to be probably the best decision that we can do with that thing. And I always tell people, they say, well, I feel like success is part of your spiritual well-being and that you're thinking of God's word. If it don't line up with the Bible, I don't do it.

It goes back to what define right. You have a compass and a biblical worldview.

Right. Exactly. Exactly. So that's just the way I look at things like that. I think it's more safer that way. And I think you'll get a better outcome that way.

Yeah. Yeah. And if you don't have a piece, don't do it. I've learned that right. Like, and guilt is not from God. Any kind of anxious feeling that's not from God. And that discernment is a muscle that gets stronger over time as you listen to the prompting of the Holy Spirit and you're obedient.

Yes, exactly. It grows. It does. It really does. And I tell people sometimes the best decision you can make is don't make a decision. A lot of things just works itself out. God just let it works itself out. And it takes a lot of anxiety away, you know, because think about how many people just trying to deal with us to deal with that. And sometimes I'm like, just let it go. Just let it go. Move on to something else.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, we're definitely on the same page with that. We have a kind of a saying in my little group, let them, like when you're dealing with people, like let them, just let them, right? We don't have to fix everything, control everything. And I believe everything always works out for me and everything's perfect. And when I live like that, I can let things go.

Exactly, exactly. So Tiffany, let me ask you this. Because you're probably a little like me, I think. Do you ever get people that tell you that you're just hard and you push them too hard or you're too tough?

I've got it. So I love it. I love that you asked that question. I really try to first make people feel seen, valued, heard. before we get into the hard, then they're more receptive to receiving what I say. And my vulnerability builds trust. So I'm super vulnerable. I wrote a book about everything. I share everything. I share my struggles with my people. And the hard doesn't seem so hard because they know it's out of love, but That's what they paid me for. They didn't pay me to be their best friend. Like I'm calling them out in love. So yes, but I try to set them up in such a way that they receive it and it motivates them. It doesn't shut them down. Right. You got to tell them the truth because they don't need a coach or someone like you or whatever if they can just keep doing what the world wants them to. We need to be called out and our feet put to the fire. Right. So we're not doing anybody any favors if we don't.

Right. That's the thing about it. And it's good that you said what you said, because when you set that standard, or when you get somebody that you're coaching, you get them in a place where they're comfortable with you. But then they understand that, hey, this thing's going to get tough. You know, there's going to be times it's going to be tough. But you understand where my heart is at. Yes. Before we even start, you know where my heart is at. My heart is helping you to be a better you. And this is where we're going. And this is the route it's going to take.

Yeah. And if it's, they can't receive that, then they're just not ready yet. Or I may not be the coach for them. And that's okay too.

Yeah, it is. And I'm glad you said that because sometimes I'll tell people I'm just probably not the one for them. You know, I used to be like, they ain't ready. But as I grew, I just put it all on me. Maybe I'm not the one for them. You know, maybe there's somebody else out there that's, that's, that's for them. And then we move on. So they're happy. I'm happy. Everybody's good.

Well, and I think it doesn't bother me like I used to when a client may get upset or they don't like my style. I go back to rejection is God's protection. Rejection is God's protection. So my fear of abandonment was so huge and consumed me my entire life. When I would lose a client or say someone that's listening, they're going through a divorce, or a friend is not their friend anymore, or maybe they've lost a job. If I can circle back now and say rejection is God's protection, I know there's a reason that person or thing is not in my life if I live by that principle. And it doesn't mean I don't get my feelings hurt, but if I can quickly go to that, it really helps me move forward and not take it personal. Cause it's not about, it's not always about us. That's the thing.

Yep, exactly. He was talking about, um, the rejection part of things. When I was growing up, my father wasn't in my life. I think my mom and dad, they reunited when I was 30 years old. I'm 52 years old now, and they've been married since. But my father wasn't in my life. And my grandfather was the one that kind of mentored me. And because of him mentoring me, he's a pastor. He owned his own convenience store. He built his own churches and all that stuff. And because the way he mentored me, it guided me all through my life to where I am today. And I heard somebody say this one time in church, actually, on Father's Day. And like I said, I was going through resentment with my father. I'm like, man, this is the same, you know, he don't want to be in my life. Let's do this and this, dah, dah, dah, dah, you know? And the pastor said, on Father's Day, he said, do not be upset with your father and hold grudges with your father because he's not in your life. He said, maybe it was God's plan for him not to be in your life. And he probably did more harm than good in your life. That's why the person in your life is in your life right now, the one who's mentoring you. And then after he said that, and then I looked over my life and how my grandfather raised me and taught me this and taught me manhood and stuff like that. I said, wow. That's right. You know, so I got out of my little pity boy.

Yeah, I love that. Well, I just felt the Holy Spirit when you said that, because that goes back to framing your life in such a way that life happens for me, not to me. Cause you, that's your story and you can frame it how you can stay in the resentment and the anger, or it can be like, man, I am so grateful that happened because I had this amazing grandfather that walked with me that if my dad was there, that wouldn't have happened. Right. How cool is that?

Exactly. So Tiffany, let me ask you this. I'm going to talk to some leaders real quick, right? Who's listening.

I know we could just talk forever.

So what though Tiffany do like to wind down when it's all said and done, you know training and doing this and coaching and writing books and doing all this stuff, what do you do at the end of the day, when it's all said and done, to wind down?

Yeah, that's good because now I don't drink, right? That used to be the way I would wind down. That's a great question. Structure and routine are so important and going back to you have to replace the habit with the habit. So the things that I would turn to to wind down were no longer serving me. I had to find a new way to do that. And self-care looks a lot different for me too. I have self-care schedule because I do, I work a lot. My days, successful people get up early. They just do, period. I get up at four o'clock in the morning and I wanna share my morning routine first. I do a meditation. I write my paragraph, the one we talked about that's in my book. I do a little bit of like a devotion or time with God. And my full morning routine takes about two and a half to three hours for me to set my day up right. And I have kids. I've got a 23 year old and almost 18 year old and my twins will be 13 this month. And then I'd zoom all day. And then my workouts about two and a half to three hours, because that's just what I do. At the end of the day, I have a very strict non-negotiable shutdown time where I turn my phone off at about seven. It doesn't matter if I have, I mean, I will stop. If someone is texting me, my replies will stop at seven period. So non-negotiable, put the phone down at seven and get off of it completely. I go to bed at the same time every night, which is about eight o'clock. And I sleep with the phone outside of my bedroom. Because it's just better that way and. I also drink a really healthy motel at 630 every night and and that's. magnesium and apple cider vinegar and like Topo Chico or bubbly or LaCroix, whether I want it or not, like I have that drink at six 30. So I'm doing the same things every single night. And I've created the circadian rhythm where I don't get anxious and crave eating junk food and, or drinking alcohol or trying to change the way I feel because I have these really good non-negotiables and boundaries set in place. But every day looks the same for me. I mean, I've fallen in love with the process and the, the not so sexy. I love routine and it's been very, I mean, and I encourage my clients to do the same. Like you have to have a shutdown time, usually an hour or two before you go to bed.

Routine is very important. I was talking to somebody actually the day before yesterday about a routine. And one thing I said to him, I said, man, I can have my keys in my wallet in one place. My phone is in another place. You know, my glasses, they're here in another place. I said, I get up every morning and go boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, wherever he at. I said, the minute I move something to somewhere else, I'll do that one, two step. And that third step, I'll miss it. And I go out the door, I won't have a phone, or I won't have a wallet, I won't have nothing. I have to put everything in the same place. And for me to just do nothing and go through my day.

Yeah. So what I'm hearing you say is like you set yourself up for success by having a place for everything. which takes a little bit of planning and then you train your body and your mind to do it automatically.

Exactly.

But you had to plan that and it started somewhere, but then it became the normal.

Right.

Yeah. So you have to set it up first and it's a little bit challenging, but then it just becomes, like you said, just bam, bam, bam. Everything just happens.

Yeah, that's, that's right. Let's make sure you, you get everything. You touch all the right things every morning. Boom, boom, boom, boom.

I have clients who their, their life is, is chaos because they don't have a rigid morning or nighttime routine. And they are, their day is interrupted or disrupted very easily.

Yep. And that can easily happen too. Easily happen. So Tiffany, what are some unique services or programs that TO Fitness offers that are designed to stand out in the fitness community?

Yeah, my model, I've been in fitness for over 20 years. There is no other model like mine, I can guarantee it. Because of the holistic approach that I've created with the workout, my workouts you can do at home or the gym, but you can do them at home with minimal equipment and they're full body workouts, they work. I've got women in their 50s and 60s who have never worked out before and they look So fit it's it's pretty incredible but also the community aspect the the levels of mentorship within the group I have a Nutrition plan that is all whole foods. It's not Keto, it's it's just a balanced macro nutrient, you know guide and I have a certified sports nutritionist on my team that writes the meal plans and Like I said, we have community and then the one-on-one mindset zooms. So there's not many trainers that also do life coaching with you. And when you sign up with me, you get all of that. So it's like a one-stop shop for everything.

Got it. Got it. That's awesome. That's awesome. So let's talk about this. What are one of the biggest misconceptions about fitness that people have?

That's a tough question for me because it's who I am. And so that's, it's good for me to think about the person who that's not who they are. That if you've never worked out, like I'll never look fit. I'll never have that body, especially with women after a certain age, you know, I'm pre or post menopausal. So I'm never gonna have the body that I used to have. That's not true. It can be done with the right guidance, nutrition and. Workout plan. It absolutely can be done. And that's where I was saying, I've got clients who have never worked out before in their fifties and they look just as muscular as me. It's pretty incredible. So any age you can start, you do not have to have a background of working out and your body can transform at any age. It really can.

And I think that's the biggest thing about it, that I think a lot of people out here, that when they're older, they get me like, man, this is it, this is it.

And I'm like- Yeah, they're accepting.

I see people that's like 65, man, look like a football player or whatever the case may be, you know? I'm in great shape. And so you have to get the, I always tell people, I believe you just have to get the right teaching, coaching like you do. Yeah.

That's the guidance. Yeah. And the right workout for you. There's not a one size fits all approach.

Right.

Like how I would train a guy is not going to be how I would train a 60 year old woman.

Right.

So finding someone that's knowledgeable for all body types and stages of life, that's really hard to find too. And I'm really good at that.

That's awesome. That's awesome. So for someone just starting their fitness journey, what advice would you give them to stay consistent and motivated? To follow you?

Yeah, definitely follow me. You know what too, before we finish, I'm going to give your listeners a free gift. I'll circle back to that. Just starting, number one, but going back to having integrity with yourself and not negotiating with yourself, create a power promise. If that means just putting your tennis shoes on and driving to the gym, and maybe you do that for a couple of weeks, you don't even go in. Maybe you just drive there. The book Atomic Habits is amazing, James Clear. He says, every action you take is a vote for the person that you want to become. And he talks about little bitty steps to work towards the ultimate goal. And that may mean just getting in the habit of driving to the gym. Then maybe you just go in for five minutes. And then maybe it starts, it's 10 minutes. So little baby steps, but if you create your power promise, make sure it's something that you can do even on your worst day, because this is how we're going to build confidence and integrity with ourselves, which then self-discipline is also a form of self-love.

Yes.

Yeah. So just start just in every little bit matters. I have a lot of people who are I'm all or nothing. You gotta stop saying that. Stop putting labels on yourself like all or nothing. I'm a perfectionist because that is the quickest way for your brain to find evidence for that and it will just shut it down. So then you won't do it because if you can't do it perfect, then you won't do it.

Right, exactly. That was very on point. Because I always hear people say, man, it's all or nothing. It's all or nothing. And you just hit that. You said something. Next time somebody tell me that,

So then we say, okay, well, what if the opposite were true? What does that look like? Because we tell people, stop calling yourself all or nothing, so what do you call yourself? So what's the opposite of all or nothing? And for me, that might mean something different than it does for you. And define what the opposite is, so then you can start declaring that over yourself.

Right, exactly, exactly. So lastly, your life. is a testimony and I encourage everybody to follow you, go get your book, Wounded to Warrior. What would you tell somebody, Tiffany, that has all these life challenges and things they can't get past mentally in life and things that hurt them and they still feel down on their self? How can they overcome those situations?

First, you can't change or heal what you don't acknowledge. and then taking responsibility for your part in everything with the intent that you're going to get your power back and you have to participate in your own rescue. No one is going to dig you out of that hole, but you, you have to participate in your own rescue. Stop waiting for people to save you. God will give you life boats. Are you getting in the boat? Right? That's a big one. But the taking responsibility and owning your part is the first step in change. And really think about what you're thinking about. Think about what you're thinking about so you get what you think about whether you want it or not. If you are thinking about what you don't want, you will get more of what you don't want. And that's me. That's who I was. I was thinking of all the things I didn't want to happen to me anymore. And I got more of it. So be intentional about what you are thinking about. And if you are thinking about what you don't want, think about what you do want and really try to focus on that. It's work, but it works.

As long as it works, as long as it works. So Tiffany, how can people follow you and find you and get your book?

OK, first, can I give your audience a free gift? Can I give them? Absolutely. OK, so you really over deliver. I'm a follower, I follow you now and I love all your content. And so you have inspired me to over deliver too. I don't ever give anything away for free, but I want to because I know not everyone can sign up with a coach or whatever. This gift is for anybody just needing to just get started or wondering what does a holistic approach to health and fitness look like? So my gift is one full body workout that you can do anywhere. Men or women can do my workouts and my, my husband can attest to that. So full body workout, you can do anywhere. A seven day meal plan that will tell you exactly what to eat for seven days. And it's an amazing variety. My sports nutritionist on my team, she also just published her own healthy cookbook too. So it's her recipes and. one group Mindset Mastery Zoom. So I did one this morning before we met. So we're going to have one a month. And so whoever gets this free gift will be invited to that. And to get it, you can direct message me on Facebook. I'm Tiffany Owen. There may be a lot of Tiffany Owens. So I am the one with the green shirt with little flowers. I've got really muscular arms and I do have the little blue circle, the verified dot by my name. So you can direct message me on Facebook and on Instagram. I am coach Tiffany Owen on Instagram. You can message me there. I have a keyword for you. Or you can go to my website, it's coachtiffanyowen.com. And there's a place that you can message me the keyword there too. The keyword is start. Just private message me the keyword start and I will personally send you the free gift and it will help you get started on your journey. And then my book is on, it's Wounded to Warrior, How to Participate in Your Own Rescue. It's on Amazon, Walmart, Barnes and Nobles.

There you have it.

Bless you so much, Tiffany. Thank you for stopping by today. 

Thank you. 

And I'm pretty sure the listeners are going to take advantage of that free gift. 

I hope so. Thank you. 

Thank you. Thank you for tuning in to Real Talk with Reginald D. If you enjoyed listening to Real Talk with Reginald D, rate and review us on Apple Podcasts. See you next time.