"Stop Talking To Yourself Like That." | Why Your Inner Voice Is Key to Beating Emetophobia

In this week's episode, host Michelle Johnson sits down with Theresa Saludo, an ex-emetophobe living in Sydney, Australia. Theresa shares the one thing that really changed things for her, and it wasn't more exposure to the thing she feared. It was learning to tackle the inner critic and get on her own team.

Understanding the Critical Voice

How many times a day do you think you put yourself down without even noticing? Not the big, obvious moments, the quiet ones. "I can't handle this." "I'm being ridiculous." "Everyone else can just get on the flight, why can't I?" For most emetophobes, that inner negative and judgemental commentary runs almost constantly.

Theresa was no exception. She says she spoke down to herself all the time. She told herself she couldn't handle things like boats and flights and the people around her picked up on it too, quietly shielding her from anything that might scare her.  However well-meant this was from those people it sadly only confirmed Theresa's belief that she in fact couldn't cope. 

In 2023, on holiday in Hawaii, the fear escalated further than it ever had before,  nauseous, anxious, and Theresa found herself completely unable to talk herself down.

The Power of Self-Compassion

Every time you criticise yourself for feeling anxious, every time you tell yourself you're "being pathetic" for panicking about nausea, you're lowering your self esteem. High self-esteem powers your ability to cope. 

Theresa's explains her turning point, "I learned to be my own best friend and cheerleader," she says. She learnt to talk to herself  the way she'd talk to someone she actually liked.

Here's the bit people get wrong: self-compassion isn't about wrapping yourself in cotton wool or avoiding discomfort. It's what actually gives you the resilience to face things head-on. "Instead of avoiding situations, I started to face them head-on, knowing I was capable of handling whatever came my way," Theresa says. Notice the order, the compassion came first, and the courage followed. Not the other way round.

And crucially, she didn't need the fear to disappear before she could feel that way. "I realised that it was okay to feel scared, but I didn't have to let that fear control my life." 

Being scared and being capable were never mutually exclusive. She just needed a voice in her own head that believed she was capable, instead of one telling her she wasn't.

If Theresa had just white-knuckled more boats and more flights without touching how she spoke to herself in the process, she'd have been exposing herself to situations she found difficult while using a critical voice and telling herself she couldn't cope. That's not recovery, that's endurance and it doesn't hold. The self-compassion work is what changed the belief driving the fear in the first place, which is why she is now emetophobia-free and thriving!

Find out more: https://www.emetophobiafree.org
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Thanks for watching :)

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Emetophobia is the fear of vomiting/sickness: either yourself, other people, or both. Research suggests 0.1 to 8.8% percent of the population have a fear of being sick (Hout & Bouman, 2011). Emetophobia is a debilitating phobia, which significantly impacts your life: sufferers are chronically anxious and go to great lengths to avoid encountering anything sickness-related, which provides temporary relief but often results in a rollercoaster of anxiety, fear and exhaustion. Issues associated with emetophobia include: OCD, eating difficulties, anxiety-related gastric problems, phagophobia, tocophobia and more. Our goal is to raise awareness of this severe phobia and provide a solution for sufferers and their families.  

You do not need to live with Emetophobia - you can COMPLETELY overcome it. The Thrive Programme for Emetophobia (also known as Emetophobia-Free) is the single most successful and predictable method for getting rid of your emetophobia. It has helped over 20,000 emetophobes around the world overcome their phobia.

You can study the programme at home by yourself wi...