My Menopause Journey pt.1

Who would have thought this was what Kendall wanted for his birthday. Well Annette did and she gave it to him.

Menopause Journal:  https://a.co/d/00ja06Um

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:09

Holding a micro. Alright. Not a mic holder. Am I gonna do the introduction? Okay. Well you were telling us what happened. Uh yeah, you're still not in the mic. I'm in the mic. Directly. I'm in the mic. Directly.

SPEAKER_02 0:35

I'm in the mic.

SPEAKER_03 0:36

Welcome to another episode of Dove Stories. Well, it's your story and it's your story to tell. This story is a little different. Um different type of format than we usually do on the show. Um, it's a very, very important part of life. And then I do believe when men and women. And um so hyphen today is my birthday, but happy birthday. Thank you. But somehow, this is not a birthday story, and that's what I like about Dub Story so much because it is not necessarily of what you're looking for at the time or um a specific story, you know, because you never know what story you're gonna receive at that time when somebody tells a good story. So, welcome to Love Story. Um, today I have uh a lovely, beautiful blessed. I'm not finished. Um beautiful, blessed. I'm trying to do uh an intro that's probably not gonna succeed.

SPEAKER_01 2:01

But give it up, y'all, for my co-hosts.

SPEAKER_02 2:05

And that why you say it's not gonna succeed?

SPEAKER_03 2:10

Cause it's probably not gonna be enough, and then you know.

SPEAKER_02 2:13

Because you only said two things.

SPEAKER_03 2:15

I know because you you cut me off during my flow.

SPEAKER_02 2:17

I was I was getting ready to go in, and then I say awful, and then you suppose just keep going.

SPEAKER_01 2:24

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_02 2:25

Go ahead, do it again.

SPEAKER_01 2:27

You can't re you can't repeat. You can.

unknown 2:30

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 2:31

I'll I'll I'll I'll I'll come back to it. Can we come back to it? Okay.

SPEAKER_03 2:37

So today we were just sitting here talking, and um, we have these we talk often about this type of thing.

SPEAKER_02 2:43

Well, can I first say the reason that I started talking about it?

SPEAKER_01 2:48

It is your birthday and unfortunately I'm not feeling well. And for the past couple of weeks, I've been experiencing a lot of anxiety. And today it just happened to come on when we were about to, you know, plan get up and do things for your birthday. Right. Right, so we this is where we are. It's where we are.

SPEAKER_03 3:22

So you said, well, let's podcast about it.

SPEAKER_02 3:24

Well, I said that because you started telling me a story about work, and I was like, you did not do that.

SPEAKER_01 3:36

And I think you did.

SPEAKER_03 3:38

Yeah, um, yeah, because I always you you always say I got a story, so I just started telling the story.

SPEAKER_02 3:44

I know, but the things that you said was like wrong. Like let the people know. Tell tell them what it started with.

SPEAKER_01 3:53

Well, I'm I wasn't wrong.

SPEAKER_03 3:55

I just probably wasn't um I wasn't giving it how you would have gave it.

SPEAKER_02 4:02

Okay. Tell the story. Start telling the story. So then I'm gonna like Okay, I was at work one day.

SPEAKER_03 4:08

I was at work the other day. And um my coworker, where we were working, it was real cool because the air conditioning was really, you know, it was like 90 degrees outside. I mean, about 80 something, 80-something degrees. And I had a sweater on, but we was inside the building and the air was on, the air was blazing in this area.

SPEAKER_01 4:31

And she says, Um, I'm feeling hot. I'm I'm I'm really hot right now. Um, so she's probably like in her early 30s, mid-30s, or whatever like that.

SPEAKER_03 4:45

And um, because I've known her for some years, and she's been working, so uh I know she's pretty young, younger than me. So we we joke around and stuff like that, but I says, I said, you're hot? Like you mean like you like you sweating, like you okay?

SPEAKER_01 5:04

She's like, no, I just got real hot all of a sudden. And I was like, Oh.

SPEAKER_03 5:11

So I I I don't know if I would I probably was overstepping myself, but you were, you were, but and then I was like, you ever thought that No no no no you you skipped the part.

SPEAKER_02 5:21

What I no, I asked her. I asked her how old was she? You don't do that.

SPEAKER_03 5:28

Young people, younger people don't care. Younger people don't care how when you ask them how old they are. They know that they're much younger than me, so they don't care. They were like, oh yeah, I'm only 30 something. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_02 5:41

But you in that girl business, like you shouldn't have asked how old she was.

SPEAKER_03 5:45

Well, she said she was 30, I think 30 or 35. Right. I said, oh, okay. I said, you ever thought that you might have uh pre-menopause?

SPEAKER_02 5:56

Okay, well, we we say perimenopause, but so I I said it wrong. Well, I you can say pre, but the the actual term is perimenopause.

SPEAKER_03 6:07

Because I hear a lot of people say pre, so I'm not the only one out here just saying it wrong. No disrespect.

SPEAKER_02 6:14

Okay, but perimenopause is the medical term.

SPEAKER_03 6:17

Oh, peri man is true. Yes, you're you're right. Okay, so for the listeners out there, it's peri, okay?

SPEAKER_02 6:22

The medical term.

SPEAKER_03 6:23

Medical term. And maybe we should be used using it, it's just yeah, because peri sounds better than pre.

SPEAKER_01 6:31

Pre is easier to remember. You wanna say peri. Yeah. So maybe I I felt like uh somebody didn't have a big thing. It's the birthday cost. What are our birthday calls? It's my birthday. Who's calling? Uh Mary. Okay, we're gonna get her on. We can. Okay. Uh let's see. Alright. Oh, you hung up. Yeah, we'll have to call it. Yeah, we have to call it back. Okay. Um yeah, so we we're talking about the uh pre Perry. Perry. And just regular menopause, because that's what I'm expecting right now. The menopause. Oh blown. It's been since 2022. We are in 2026. And I just thought that I was I had a handle on the hot flashes. I was sleeping better.

SPEAKER_02 7:42

And um I think the medication just like really spiked my anxiety, so I may have to go back to the hot flashes than not sleeping until I can find something.

SPEAKER_01 8:00

This doesn't feel good. I'll pulled out my journal.

SPEAKER_02 8:06

Start looking at my menopause journal that I wrote and you can get it on Amazon, everybody. It's called Menopause Journal, My Menopause Journey.

SPEAKER_01 8:18

Yeah. So what made you do a menopause journal? I mean, I know um some folk uh women had throat and menopa menopause and or they journal on menopause.

SPEAKER_03 8:35

So what made you come up with uh something and I'm pretty sure it's more personal to the way you wrote it and the way you uh organized it. It is, it is so so women can navigate.

SPEAKER_02 8:51

Well well, you know I like to journal, so I was like, why don't I I I just started like looking at menopause once I started going through all the symptoms, I just was like only thing I knew about was hot flashes. When I started researching and thinking about doing this journal, it w I it it was like 18 things on here that I found out about, and there's many, many more. So my mom didn't really, you know, talk to me about menopause, but I just heard about high flashes, that's it. It was just hot flash. So when I thought about menopause, that's what I thought was gonna happen. So um I said, you know what?

SPEAKER_01 9:41

I'm gonna dedicate this journal to my daughters so that they'll know how to be prepared, what to expect and um you know, just have some knowledge on what they're what they may go through.

SPEAKER_02 10:00

Because maybe not all women go through pause, um, but a lot of women do. So if my daughters, you know, just happen to go through it, they they'll have something that they can refer to.

SPEAKER_01 10:13

Right. So what was the first step like felt like it's the first thing I talk about, that's the first thing I'm addressed.

SPEAKER_03 10:21

Um Because uh the hot flashes wasn't the only thing that's what you yeah, and I think a lot of people just think um when you hear menopause, you think of just high flash.

SPEAKER_02 10:35

Yeah, yeah, and that's what I thought. But other things started happening to me. And I was like, what is where is this coming from? And as I, you know, started looking into things and just researching, it was tied to menopause.

SPEAKER_01 10:55

Like already when when women are over 50, it's hard to lose weight.

SPEAKER_02 10:59

And you know, I've been trying to lose my mention for quite some time.

SPEAKER_01 11:06

So that was like a um I like slapping it because it's hard to lose weight during menopause.

SPEAKER_02 11:16

And I know everybody says you gotta exercise, you gotta do, you gotta do that.

SPEAKER_01 11:21

Um I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_02 11:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 11:24

But you my it's it is my birthday and the girls is calling. You just was talking about who's calling?

SPEAKER_01 11:30

The girl? Yeah. Oh, get them on, get them on. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Yeah. I think um Hello? Yeah, they were just calling, but um that's so lovely. Hello? Hello, hello Nissa, Nissa. Can you hear me? Um Yeah, we just call it back. Well, you you go ahead and she's gonna tell you happy birthday. I think she wanna wait to earn. Okay. No, we're we're we'll we'll call her back. Okay. So, um So you like you said, you did it for um something to pass on to your daughters uh being aware.

SPEAKER_03 12:31

So and your daughters are at at around the same age, right? So it's the same thing.

SPEAKER_02 12:38

And and this is 30.

SPEAKER_03 12:40

Okay. Okay. So at any given time, right?

SPEAKER_01 12:47

Right, you can start experience the Perry Miniball. Yes. Right. Okay. So I I wasn't incorrect.

SPEAKER_02 13:01

No, you I mean, no, but it could have been a number of reasons why she thought.

SPEAKER_03 13:07

I know, but you know, I I just think that a women think that that's something that more mature or older women and they're not prepared. Right. And they struggle with it for so long, because before they even realize or somebody even tell them, hey, listen, this this is normal. This is what might you know I mean, because it's just not hot flashes, it could be something else going on with them.

SPEAKER_02 13:30

Well, that's what I had started to tell you.

SPEAKER_01 13:32

Like, I started getting having other things going on, and I was like, the heck. And as I, you know, started um researching and talking to my doctor, like, yeah, that that can happen. Right.

SPEAKER_03 13:52

So, I mean, just been on this journey with you because I felt like I am on this journey with you.

SPEAKER_02 13:58

Are you though?

SPEAKER_03 13:59

Yeah, I am. Okay. Well, I mean, who else is gonna be on the journey? Well, well Yeah, exactly. So I've I've I've been on the other end of the menopause and the perimenopause.

SPEAKER_02 14:15

Well, I really didn't have peri because remember I had my erectomy and I went right in.

SPEAKER_01 14:20

So there was no period. Oh, okay. Well, you might not have known what it was.

SPEAKER_02 14:30

So you think that I was in Perry before?

SPEAKER_03 14:33

It's a possibility. You just you just didn't know what it was. You you was expecting it later on, I believe. And then it hit you by surprise because you didn't um you thinking like, okay, this just came out of nowhere or whatever, but I it could have been happening before. You just never knew what it was. You was wait, you was waiting for a later period. No, I'm just saying it's possible. It's possible if you don't have the knowledge of, you know, that's just with with anything, whether it's finances, whether this um, if you don't know, nobody never tells you like, hey, this can happen at this age or or before then, um, you thinking it's something else, and and it's not that it's like, hey, start preparing yourself.

SPEAKER_02 15:19

Okay, it could have been the other symptoms that besides the uh the hot flashes.

SPEAKER_03 15:25

Right.

SPEAKER_02 15:25

Like the anxiety, the mood swings, that's probably what you're talking about.

SPEAKER_03 15:29

Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 15:30

The air irritability.

SPEAKER_03 15:32

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 15:33

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 15:34

Is that is that in your book? Yeah. So when you when you when you in in your journal, um I think a lot of people, women will reflect on the moose wings, right? They'll reflect on it probably a lot. Why you just pick moose wings? Um, just because moose wings trigger reactions, you know. Yeah. They do. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 16:10

So if you write it down, then you kind of come like, hey, you kind of can reflect on, like, yeah. Oh, that's why. Yeah. He made me mad. Yeah. And then you go back to it and then read it and be like, oh, it wasn't him. Well, it wasn't her. You know what I mean? It wasn't they, it wasn't them. Okay. You know what I'm saying? Like, I'm I'm just saying this, it's okay. That's okay.

SPEAKER_02 16:33

I thought you said you were in this on this journey with me. It doesn't sound like you are.

SPEAKER_03 16:37

I am. I'm I'm in I'm in full support. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 16:40

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 16:41

I'm just trying to help you, you know. When you, you know, I guess that's why people journal, so you can look back and reflect on past. You wrote it down, and and now you can go back and see where you were at in your life at that time.

SPEAKER_02 16:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 16:56

You know, so um definitely, yeah. So your children, right? Can look back in that journal and be like, oh mom, this happened at mom at this age. Oh, this is when. Oh, I remember this day, you know? And then they become more understanding. You know. I mean, I've become more understanding.

SPEAKER_01 17:17

Have you?

SPEAKER_03 17:18

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 17:19

Okay. I appreciate that.

SPEAKER_03 17:21

I don't walk around the house with hoodies on for re for no reason. Yeah, but you the neighbors think I'm crazy. It's 90 degrees outside. I come outside with a hoodie on.

SPEAKER_02 17:31

That's because but but you turn the air down in the middle of the night.

SPEAKER_01 17:36

Well, that's a no-no. You can't do that.

SPEAKER_03 17:42

I'm invested, probably not fully invested. No.

SPEAKER_01 17:45

Well, you need to get fully, okay? It's not funny.

SPEAKER_03 17:49

It's not funny. I'm 90% there. That's not funny. But I'm, I mean, I I could be possibly going through some kind of change, also. So we we are the same age. There we go. We are the same age. It's possible. Not about you. I I know it's not about me, but it's possible that I could be going through something. I believe you go through something.

SPEAKER_02 18:11

I I believe y'all go through a lot.

SPEAKER_03 18:13

Right.

SPEAKER_02 18:14

Y'all do.

SPEAKER_03 18:15

They just they may not have diagnosed it, which I don't know if they have or have not, but I'm pretty sure we go through some kind of change in our in our bodies.

SPEAKER_02 18:23

Oh, definitely. Not like y'all's because no, not like us.

SPEAKER_01 18:28

I said that.

SPEAKER_02 18:29

Yeah, not like us.

SPEAKER_01 18:30

Just saying. Ooh. All right. Well, I said everything is right. Can't mention everything you can't speak on. Nope.

SPEAKER_03 18:42

And men, you know, we yeah, we we're not supposed to, I guess, um, speak on certain things. But we should. We should in support. In support, not um Guess what I just not to try to what'd you find?

SPEAKER_02 18:58

That's what I just found on the internet.

SPEAKER_03 19:00

What?

SPEAKER_02 19:01

Men do not experience menopause like women do, but they go through a similar, more gradual condition, often called andropause.

SPEAKER_03 19:14

I don't like the way that's a good idea.

SPEAKER_02 19:16

While women experience a sudden drop in hormone estrogen, stopping their rebirth cycle, a man's dominant sex hormone, testosterone, steadily declines by about 1% per year, starting in their in his 30s and 40s. See one percent. Because the change is so slow rather than finite finite, the medical community prefers terms like age-related, I don't know how to or testosterone deficiency.

SPEAKER_01 19:56

Okay, so rather than male menopause. And what is that called? The your thing you got? Andropause.

SPEAKER_03 20:08

I don't I didn't say I had andropause. Where did you get that from?

SPEAKER_02 20:12

Oh, oh, I never said I had andropause. Check this out, check this out.

SPEAKER_03 20:15

See how you diagnose me?

SPEAKER_02 20:17

When testosterone levels drop significantly, men may experience similar symptoms to female menopause, including, are you ready? Including, including fatigue and lower energy levels, lower sex drive, and erectile dysfunction, mood swings, irritability, or mild depression, abdominal weight gain, and reduced muscle mass. So oh oh, I'm not dying. Sleep disturbances, and check this out.

SPEAKER_01 21:04

I'm so glad we're having this discussion.

SPEAKER_03 21:08

I'm so glad. And and I'm not I'm not discrediting anything from the women, and I'm not saying that we are the same, and I'm not saying that you better your bodies, I'm never gonna take that away from you better not.

SPEAKER_01 21:25

But what we're gonna talk about. We're gonna talk about equality. Get out of here, man. No, let's okay, let's go.

SPEAKER_02 21:38

I'm gonna have one more thing in this article. Let's have one more thing in this article I have to say. However, many of these symptoms are also tied to lifestyle stress or other physical health.

SPEAKER_03 21:52

Oh, so now let's not diagnose it. Well, however.

SPEAKER_02 22:01

Yeah, basically.

SPEAKER_03 22:03

We get the high level.

SPEAKER_02 22:04

Yeah. However.

SPEAKER_03 22:06

However.

SPEAKER_02 22:07

However, you just mean. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 22:08

That's what you is. So that's so we so like I said, we we go through, we go, we have to go through something, you know. And then at the same time, we going through stuff and and also being supportive of what you guys are going through. Yes. So we have to do both.

SPEAKER_02 22:26

And we don't?

SPEAKER_03 22:27

No, because you will not alter their error.

SPEAKER_02 22:31

I will not.

SPEAKER_03 22:34

You will not.

SPEAKER_02 22:35

But there are other things. You will not alter.

SPEAKER_03 22:37

You will not be like, you know what? You know, I'm just saying, like, in support of an understanding of where we are.

SPEAKER_02 22:44

But it says here that you may experience hot flashes. It doesn't say you cold. So that might be a health issue that you have. You may have to see your healthcare provider to find out why you're so cold.

SPEAKER_03 23:02

Okay. I might need to seek additional help. Additional physical.

SPEAKER_01 23:10

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 23:11

All right.

SPEAKER_02 23:12

That was that one.

SPEAKER_03 23:13

Yeah. Ladies, now y'all know if I had to say, well, maybe you need to seek a physical, you need to go seek additional help from your doctor. If this ain't working out, let me have said that.

SPEAKER_02 23:27

Well, I I'm only going by what I read.

SPEAKER_01 23:31

And it says it may be from some other health issues. Different folks. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 23:40

Well, I'm I'm I'm happy that you did your mana pause journey and um journal. Journal. So what was the first chapter? What's what's your first um subject? Or what's the first login?

SPEAKER_02 23:54

Well, um, I just started off as just giving everybody a um how I was how I feel, like how how I I'm actually feeling, how I really feel.

SPEAKER_01 24:09

That's what it's called, how I really feel. So did you want to share? I can if you want. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 24:18

So the first page is how I really feel. So it says, Some days I don't feel like being bothered. I'm irritated most of the time. And at work, I just want everybody to do their job.

SPEAKER_03 24:38

That sounds like normal stuff. That don't sound like metaphors to me.

SPEAKER_02 24:43

Uh so it's it's just going through like everything. Like when you go to church, you want want to come and and worship. Like, you don't want to have, you know, this going on, that going on on the way to work. You want your commute to be good. Um, it just seemed like everybody is just so angry. Um, and I also said I want my face not to feel like it's on fire.

SPEAKER_01 25:12

Now I can I can't imagine that. I can't. Like that's gotta be very uncomfortable.

SPEAKER_03 25:20

It's because the way you describe it, you describe it as your insides burning.

SPEAKER_02 25:26

It's my face, yeah. Yeah, it's on fire.

SPEAKER_03 25:28

Yeah, I c I can't imagine that.

SPEAKER_01 25:30

Like, and and and not being able to control it. Um yeah, I can't. And it also says I want to swell every night. I want to stop going to the bathroom every 30 minutes. And it's all uh end it with saying I want to stop feeling sorry for myself one minute and the next I am the most motivated woman in the world. That's eat So with menopause and for women before menopause you have you your uh cycle, right? Can't you say that again?

SPEAKER_03 26:19

Your cycle.

SPEAKER_02 26:20

What about a cycle?

SPEAKER_03 26:21

So when women start having your bodies are changing also and you also go through these things during that time.

SPEAKER_02 26:29

What my cycle you're saying?

SPEAKER_01 26:30

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 26:32

Um Yeah, some of these some of these um symptoms, I guess you can call them, happen when you you have your cycle, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:44

So it's just an ongoing thing. Right for women is very sad to me. Right. Right. And and and I guess um that's why that will always uh always what?

SPEAKER_03 27:02

Always become um like I'm like I said, like what we what we saying that they're saying that we go through that one percent is nowhere close.

SPEAKER_02 27:12

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 27:13

Of what you guys go through because one percent after 30, and y'all been going through this since y'all probably was at 12 years old, 11 years old, some 10 years old, you know what I mean? Body changes is nowhere comparison to our 1% drop in whatever.

unknown 27:30

Right?

SPEAKER_02 27:31

Per year. And it says starting in your 30s.

SPEAKER_03 27:34

Starting in my 30s. So But you're right. That's like I'm at Trina Trent.

SPEAKER_02 27:39

Trina, whenever.

SPEAKER_03 27:40

Okay, hold on.

SPEAKER_01 27:42

Okay, now the calls are disruptive. Hello? Hello. Nobody's okay, nobody's coming. Nobody. Okay. So what we're gonna do is um like I said, y'all, it's it's my birthday.

SPEAKER_03 28:03

And um, so I'm getting the birthdays calls, and and and but we decided to do this podcast right now. We're actually in the bed podcast and you know what?

SPEAKER_02 28:13

You can tell that this is something that you love to do because it's your birthday.

SPEAKER_03 28:18

Yep.

SPEAKER_02 28:19

And you pulled the equipment out, you got it on the bed.

SPEAKER_03 28:22

We're in the bed podcast.

SPEAKER_02 28:23

And we got our headphones on, our mics in our hand, and crazy.

SPEAKER_03 28:29

Yep, and and you want to talk about you wanna first of all, you you want to podcast. So anytime you want to podcast, I'm gonna pull a mic out.

SPEAKER_02 28:37

Well, I said that because I just thought that that um conversation that you had on your job was like interesting. Like, yeah, we gotta talk about this. Like, I wanted somebody to say, you wanted me to stop. You wanted to stop I want I said don't say nothing else. I want everybody to hear that you asked this young lady how old she was, first of all, and then you proceeded to diagnose her with Perry Menopause.

SPEAKER_03 29:04

I was trying to guide her as I was trying to guide her as you know, a person who's been through life and say, hey, I understand. I guess, and I think maybe coming from a man is it makes her feel more, you know.

SPEAKER_02 29:18

How do you know she ain't have a picture when she's gonna be like, we cool like that.

SPEAKER_03 29:21

Not even ask her all about that, but I'm like, hey, listen, maybe that's jump straight to the menopause, like, yeah, because you know, she was like, Oh, I don't know, that might be, you know, yeah, because no, I've been married to this woman for uh 30 some years, we've known each for 40 years. So uh yeah, I mean, I'm not saying I can speak on all women, but right, I do have some knowledge and some insight that I can share amongst the younger people. Okay, you know, um it all comes with the territory when it comes down to marriage and raising kids and understanding, hey, listen, your body changes, you're a woman, your body changes, and you're gonna do things, you're gonna, you know, you're gonna say things, you're gonna feel a certain type of way. That's fine. You know, I mean, I've raised two women, you know, so um, you know, I wasn't always, I ain't saying I'm always the understanding father when it comes to that because I I ness I wasn't. I wasn't. I do, I did push our girls to, you know, whatever, but I ain't saying I was the understanding when it comes down to women issues. And and I don't have to be because that's not me. You know. What do you mean by that? I'm saying I don't have to be an expert.

SPEAKER_02 30:38

Um, I thought you said nothing else.

SPEAKER_03 30:41

No, I'm saying I'm not speaking like I'm an expert because of the 40 years I have been with you and raising two women and and and most of my family members, close family members of women. I'm not saying that I'm an expert because of that. Okay, but I'm close. Oh my gosh. I'm the closest Gemini. I'm the closest you're gonna get next to a uh a physician.

SPEAKER_02 31:04

And there is that Gemini. What? Close to a physician.

SPEAKER_01 31:09

That's the closest you're gonna get.

SPEAKER_02 31:16

Are you gonna I'm talking from experience?

SPEAKER_03 31:18

I'm not talking from I'm talking from experience of women of in in in my family and friends. I have a lot of close family friends and women and do you know how you edit your podcast?

SPEAKER_02 31:31

You you know when you edit.

SPEAKER_03 31:32

I'm not gonna edit that part.

SPEAKER_01 31:35

I'm not I'm not.

unknown 31:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 31:39

Okay, let's go to the next subject and what's the next subject? Um in a menopause book? Yes. Oh, I should because that was like the first thing that happened. And that's how I kind of realized I was in menopause. So basically, again, my face turns red.

SPEAKER_02 32:20

It takes a few minutes for it to get back to normal temperature. I was feeling like my body was on fire at the time. Now really it's just my face.

SPEAKER_01 32:30

It's not my body until nighttime. And then it's my body.

SPEAKER_02 32:39

And also, I'm gonna say it was up until this uh maybe maybe March or April, I just started having like thick sweats. And that's why that prompted me to try and y get some medication to control this.

SPEAKER_01 33:04

And for me to finally like I finally started sleeping better.

SPEAKER_02 33:12

No sweating. And I think that now I can't even take this medicine because it's it's just heightened my anxiety.

SPEAKER_01 33:23

So I have to choose do I want to go through that or do I want to sleep?

SPEAKER_03 33:30

And that's that's that's the maybe maybe maybe you should explore.

SPEAKER_02 33:36

I mean, people talk about natural options, yeah. Yeah. Natural, um I mean, I've been try trying to take um what's the name of that?

SPEAKER_01 33:46

Is it natural? Ashwaganda. Saying it right. Supposed to be something that you know helps. I've been I was taking it before I started with the um armo medication. So I don't know, it's it's just back like I said, back to corn to see what worked. Do what else works besides medication or turning on the fan?

SPEAKER_03 34:20

Like, I mean, is is it is it something like uh like you do a lot of things to keep yourself busy.

SPEAKER_01 34:27

Is do you do things to help your mental?

SPEAKER_03 34:33

Like, so you're not focused on going through these changes. Um, some people uh say, you know, I may run, I may exercise, you know, or a certain hobbies.

SPEAKER_02 34:47

I don't think I do those hobbies to take my mind off of it. I think it's just I just do those hobbies because I like to. Like sometimes if I come home and I want to work on my puzzle, that's just something that I want to do. It's not even just to get my mind off of it, but it does interrupt my my time with my hobby because I'll get a hot flash out of nowhere. And now I'm discouraged because I can't finish my puzzle. I'm I'm fanning, or I just gotta sit down. Because sometimes, like if I'm standing up, or I just gotta get out of the chair that I'm in, because I don't, it's not like a comfy chair that I'm sitting in when I'm puzzling.

SPEAKER_00 35:31

Right.

SPEAKER_02 35:32

So I gotta get comfortable and and you know, get myself together. So it's like it actually interrupts my hobby. Like, you know, I've been doing my my ties and for the past week or so I haven't been doing anything. I I haven't even been working on my puzzle because of this anxiety. So it interrupts my life.

SPEAKER_01 35:58

It um interrupts like the things that I enjoy. So it's not me have doing something to keep my mind off of it. It's I'm just trying to do life and it just interrupts it. Right. What else? So what's next on the uh we're going through the minute pause journal. Okay. Well, we're just gonna just we can just go through so cool. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 36:32

I see it next. I see the next this is this is this is next, and this is something.

SPEAKER_03 36:39

Uh I mean you don't we don't have to talk about that.

SPEAKER_02 36:42

No, no, you don't want to talk about that. As a married couple, that's on the and as married couples, like I think that men are need to understand this.

SPEAKER_03 36:50

You ain't waste no time putting that in the books.

SPEAKER_02 36:52

That's like the third sex or not.

SPEAKER_03 36:54

That's like the third uh yeah. You we're straight to it. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 37:01

So um what what sex or not?

SPEAKER_01 37:04

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 37:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 37:05

So what does that mean? I mean, we know uh either sex or not, but what does that really mean?

SPEAKER_02 37:14

Basically, um I'm not gonna speak for every woman, but for me, um, the drive wasn't there.

SPEAKER_01 37:24

And um, I think that that was kind of hard for you to understand. No. Yeah. No. No. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 37:36

Um, so basically, that's that's just the bottom line of that.

SPEAKER_03 37:42

Like, like, just like I said. Dang, you like, you didn't understand. Uh, well, so we could move forward.

SPEAKER_02 37:49

Jeez. I mean, I didn't like, I I gave like a little couple sentences.

SPEAKER_03 37:54

I thought we were gonna get deep. She like, because you didn't understand.

SPEAKER_02 37:58

No, I'm not saying, I know, no, no, I'm not saying it.

SPEAKER_01 38:01

I'm saying it's like what's the what's the question?

SPEAKER_03 38:08

What's the oh he says?

SPEAKER_02 38:10

I said I always say after I write my little sentence or whatever, I say your turn. Any problems in this area for you. So whoever, you know, purchases this book, it's like your turn. Are you having problems in this area? So I guess, you know, just journal about what your what your um experiences were for this topic. And and the reason why I said um, because speaking with other women, like this can put a strain on your relationship. And it just adds to the other symptoms. It it um because it is it's frustrating. It's you you get irritable because you know, you you can't do what you used to do, or you don't, and then you don't feel how you used to feel. So um, yeah, I think I think this is a big topic for um married women.

SPEAKER_03 39:10

Well, it's a big topic for anybody that's in a relationship. No, I'm just saying anybody in a relationship, it's a big topic because is it's more of a big topic if you're not an if you're not married, because you're more reluctant to have a conversation with someone you're just dating for like a year or two.

SPEAKER_02 39:28

Okay, but when you're dating someone, you don't have an obligation to to do anything. But if you're not an obligation if you're married, that's a that's an obligation to your relationship.

SPEAKER_01 39:41

Yeah, yeah, but it's I think it's easier to handle. What? If you're not married this part portion the sex. Um that's a whole nother topic. Well, I think it's easier to handle I don't want to talk about it.

SPEAKER_03 40:08

Because I can't speak on being single and dating somebody that's I don't I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 40:13

So I can't I'm I'm just I can't speak on it.

SPEAKER_03 40:16

So if anybody out here that's been in a relationship with somebody and you're not married, right? And you're not living in the same and you're not let's just say you're not living in the same house. Because that that that's the difference. And if you if you're in relationship with someone, you live in the same house, you're pretty much doing married things with each other, sleeping together, you know what I'm saying, sharing the same space. So you kind of see the day-to-day, you know what I'm saying? You see the day-to-day changes, you see the day-to-day same uh um responses, you know. I mean, you're around it, but if you're not living with that person, then you you don't know. So when it's like, how do you explain that when you when you're dating? And are like, well, am I obligated to say something? I'm like, because it is a medical, something medical that you're going through, but I'm like, well, yeah, I mean, especially if a man he doesn't know, he haven't experienced anything like that.

SPEAKER_01 41:15

If if you are in your 40s or 50s and and you have never experienced living with a woman, um yeah, go ahead.

SPEAKER_02 41:27

I'm I'm sorry. Um one of the things that um I mentioned. Oh, okay. One of the things that I mentioned earlier, one was um the going to the bathroom every 30 minutes. Remember I mentioned that?

SPEAKER_03 41:42

That's something I missed though.

SPEAKER_02 41:44

No, that was in the beginning.

SPEAKER_03 41:45

No, I'm saying I missed that living with you.

unknown 41:48

What?

SPEAKER_02 41:48

I didn't, I'm saying I just wait, I got something to say. Okay. Remember that 30 minutes I gotta go to the bathroom every 30 minutes?

SPEAKER_03 41:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 41:55

I gotta go.

SPEAKER_03 42:02

Okay, um, so this this is this uh concludes another episode.

SPEAKER_02 42:09

Can we take a break?

SPEAKER_03 42:12

We're gonna cut this dub story short. We're gonna take a break on the understanding.

SPEAKER_02 42:17

We got some more stuff to go through.

SPEAKER_03 42:19

Right.

SPEAKER_02 42:19

So can we take a break and back?

SPEAKER_03 42:21

It can happen in yeah, it can happen in the middle of a podcast.

SPEAKER_02 42:25

In the middle of a podcast, and understand it. I appreciate it.

SPEAKER_03 42:30

So we're gonna be back with part part two. Um be back. What's what's this call? My menopause journey. No, what's this first episode called?

SPEAKER_02 42:44

Um podcaster.

SPEAKER_03 42:47

Let's call it the Perry Episode. No, okay.

SPEAKER_02 42:55

No, we'll we'll think of something.

SPEAKER_03 42:56

We'll think of something, but ladies, I'm with y'all. Fellas, I'm with y'all on this. Um, we have to talk about it.

SPEAKER_02 43:02

Ladies, we we we go through.

SPEAKER_03 43:05

I'm with y'all. Oh, you gotta go here. Uh, thank y'all um for joining this episode.

SPEAKER_02 43:13

Um, we'll be back.

SPEAKER_03 43:15

It's your story, and it's your story to tell. Devstory.