Peace isn’t a mood. 

Peace is a decision. 

It’s why it’s called the present — because peace only exists in this moment. 

Three Key Teaching Points 

1. Recreate the Feeling 

Your happiest memories aren’t in the past — they’re in your nervous system. You can activate joy, gratitude, and calm any time. 

2. Happiness Without Agenda 

You can feel good without waiting for circumstances to be perfect. Choose peace now, before anything improves. 

3. Choose Peace Over Pressure 

This season, decide to respond from calm instead of chaos. 

Faith over fear. 

Love over control. 

Presence over pressure. 

Three Practical Steps for Listeners 

Step 1 – Pause for ten seconds before reacting. 

Peace lives in that gap. 

Step 2 – Ask: “What would the peaceful version of me do right now?” 

Instant clarity. 

Step 3 – Be the reason someone believes the world is still good. 

A small kindness changes everything. 

The Reframe 

When you choose peace again and again, happiness becomes your default state. Not because everything went right — but because you did. You showed up for yourself. You mastered your mind. 

Christmas doesn’t create stress — our thoughts about Christmas create stress. 
The busier life gets, the louder the inner chatter becomes. 

At Christmas, people say things to themselves like: 

• “I should be happier.” 
• “I’m not doing enough.” 
• “Everyone else has it sorted except me.” 
• “This has to be perfect.” 

This inner Grinch steals the joy of the season. 
But we can flip it — quickly and powerfull! 

 The Christmas Mindset Shift 

Tool 1: Become Your Own Christmas Coach 

Instead of: 

“I can’t cope — everything’s going wrong.” 

Say: 

“Deirdre, you’re doing your best. Christmas is about connection, not perfection.” 

Example: 
You burn the roasties? 
stick on your favourite Christmas song, start again  

Tool 2: The January Test 

When you start spiralling, ask yourself:
“Will this matter in mid-January?” 
99% of the time — no. 

Example: 
A relative makes a half-snide comment? 
In January, you won’t even remember it. 
Instant relief. 

Tool 3: Shift Your State 

Your environment affects your thoughts. 
A quick physical or sensory shift snaps you out of overthinking. 

Try: 

• Step outside into the cold for 2 minutes 
• Put on a song that changes your emotional temperature 
• Light a candle 

Example: 
Kids shouting, dinner burning, phone buzzing — step outside, breathe, re-enter with new energy. 

Tool 4: The Christmas Permission Slip 

Give yourself permission to: 

• Not be perfect 
• Say no 
• Simplify gifts 
• Attend fewer events 
• Protect your peace 
• Do Christmas in your own way 

Example: 
“This year I’m choosing presence over pressure.” 

Your 3-Step Christmas Solution 

1. Catch the Inner Grinch 
Notice when your thinking goes negative. 

2. Coach Yourself Kindly 
Speak to yourself the way you’d speak to someone you adore. 

3. Choose People Over Perfection 
Ask: “What actually matters today?” 
The answer is usually: the moment, the connection, the feeling — not the job list. 

“Beat the Christmas rush — go from chaos to in charge in 3 steps.”

How to get ahead,

stay in control,

and actually enjoy

the next 6 weeks.

Question for Frank

“What Are You a YES For This Christmas?”

A) “Here we go — stress, pressure, and trying to please everyone.”

B) “Ach, I’ll leave it ’til the week before.”

C) “This year… I want it to feel different.”

D) “I love Christmas, but it exhausts me!”

But the people who enjoy it — the calm ones, the present ones, the grounded ones —

they decide ahead of time what Christmas is going to mean for them.

The 3 Bullet-Proof Christmas Mindset Decisions

1 — YES to Emotional Boundaries

Like Malachy, decide what you’re focusing on this year.

Examples:

- Say, “Let me get back to you on that,” instead of instant yes.

- Give yourself permission to leave gatherings early.

- Choose the people who fill your cup, not empty it.

Reframe:

You’re not being difficult — you’re being deliberate

2 — YES to a Calm Financial Plan

Christmas panic spending is a mindset problem, not a money problem.

Examples:

- One present per adult.

- A simple spending limit.

- Buy meaning, not madness.

3- One grounding ritual every day: a candle, a cup of tea, a breath.

Movember started in 2003 in Australia — a few men grew moustaches to raise awareness for men’s health.

Now a global movement focusing on:

1. Prostate cancer

2. Testicular cancer

3. Men’s mental health and suicide prevention

3 Steps to Strengthen Your Mindset

Step 1 – Check In, Don’t Check Out. When stress hits, most men distract or push it down.

Instead, take a moment and ask:

“What’s really going on for me right now?” A small pause can stop a mental spiral before it starts.

Step 2 – Challenge the Voice in Your Head. If that inner critic says, “You should handle this on your own,” — question it. Would you speak that way to your best mate? Then don’t say it to yourself.

Step 3 – Connect to Release. Find one safe outlet — a mate, a mentor, a moment alone. Speaking your truth, or even writing it down, releases pressure and brings clarity. Connection is the cure for isolation.

We believe stress is something that happens to us, but many of us are actually addicted to the feeling of being on edge.

 Your brain and body can get hooked on that surge of adrenaline — the very chemical that’s meant to help in emergencies.

 When life gets calm, you crave the chaos again, because calm feels foreign.
 
 ------------------------------------------------------------
 
 Practical examples:
 - The man who finally gets a weekend off work… and ends up fixing the shed, cutting the grass, and reorganising the garage because he “can’t sit still.”
 - The mum who says she wants peace and quiet — but when the house finally goes silent, she feels uneasy and starts tidying.
 - The taxi driver who keeps the radio blaring, the phone pinging, and the conversation going — because silence feels uncomfortable.
 - The manager who checks emails at 10 PM “just in case,” unable to switch off, thinking that being always available equals being valuable.
 
 We say, “I work better under pressure” — but what we really mean is: I’m more familiar with panic than peace.
 
 ------------------------------------------------------------
 
3-Step Solution :
 
 1️⃣ Notice your baseline.
 Ask yourself: What does peace feel like in my body?
 If you can’t remember the last time you felt truly relaxed — without needing to check your phone or plan your next move — that’s your sign.
 
 Example:
 You’re watching TV but half your brain is thinking about tomorrow’s to-do list.
 That’s not relaxation — that’s low-grade stress.
 Try this instead: lie on the sofa, breathe deeply, and stay present for two minutes.
 
 ------------------------------------------------------------
 
 2️⃣ Pause before reacting.
 When you feel that surge to do something now, take one deep breath.
 Say to yourself: “This is just my old wiring — I’m safe even when I’m still.”
 
 Example:
 The email pings — instead of jumping to reply instantly, pause.
 When someone says something triggering — instead of snapping, breathe first.
 That pause is your power. It breaks the addiction cycle.
 
 ------------------------------------------------------------
 
 3️⃣ Replace the rush.
 Find a new kind of “high.” Replace the stress buzz with movement, laughter, or gratitude.
 
 Examples:
 - Take a brisk walk before work instead of doom scrolling.
 - Turn your car drive into quiet time — no radio, just breathing.
 - Swap scrolling for stretching.
 - Call a friend to share good news instead of venting about stress.
 

When it comes to winning in life, whether it’s football or personal goals:
 Do you think it’s all about 

 A) skill and strategy?
 B) luck and timing?
 C) Or is it about belief — that invisible energy every winning team carries before they even step on the pitch?

The Sequence – Living from the Inside Out 

Northern Ireland have kicked off the World Cup in style — and the buzz across the country is electric!
 But here’s what’s interesting… success in football and success in life follow the same sequence.

  So this is my team talk before the big match:

I call it the Freedom Frequency — the inner game that creates the outer scoreline.
1️⃣ Activate the Burning Desire –

The Goal Before the Goal

Before any player touches the ball, they’ve already seen it — in their mind. That burning desire to win is the emotional ignition that fuels everything else.great teams feel victory before they live it.
2️⃣ Compound the Energy Every Training, Every Thought
 The energy builds — through repetition, belief, teamwork. Just like a player repeating the same move until it becomes instinct, we build our thought patterns until they become habits.

3️⃣ Add L-O-V-E – Levels of Vibrational Energy
 Love 

for the game, 

love for the fans, 

love for the jersey — that’s what lifts the energy. It’s why the fans matter so much — they’re not just watching; they’re co-creating the frequency.

 4️⃣ Move It into Form – Take the Shot
 The thought becomes action — it’s not enough to visualise the goal, you’ve got to take the shot. Every inspired action you take is your version of putting the ball in the back of the net.
 
 

 5️⃣ Feel the Amplitude Rise – The Stadium Effect
 You know that roar when Northern Ireland scores? That’s energy amplified. Your life responds the same way — when you celebrate small wins, your vibration rises, and momentum builds.

 
 6️⃣ Give Out a Different Energy – The Ripple Effect
 When the team wins, the whole country feels it. When you raise your inner frequency, everything around you starts to align — opportunities, people, and results.
 

 That’s the Freedom Frequency — the inner game that creates the outer scoreline.

3-Step Team Talk for Listeners

1. Visualise the win – See your goal as if it’s already happened.
 2. Feel the team energy – Surround yourself with people who cheer you on.
 3. Take your shot – Every small action builds confidence and compounds success. 

The Freedom Frequency

The inner game that creates the outer scoreline.

1️⃣ Activate the Burning Desire 

2️⃣ Compound the Energy

3️⃣ Add L-O-V-E

4️⃣ Move It into Form

5️⃣ Raise the Amplitude 

6️⃣ Give Out the Energy

When life throws you a curveball, which of these sounds most like your reaction?”

A) “Typical — it’s always me that this happens to!”
B) “Right, that’s annoying — but I’ll sort it out.”
C) “I knew it — I can’t catch a break.”
D) “Maybe there’s a reason this happened — what can I learn from it?”

Teaching

Most of us start in A or C — and we don’t even realise we’ve slipped into what I call the victim mindset.
That’s when life feels like it’s happening to you instead of for you.
The car breaks down, the job’s a pain, the boss doesn’t listen — and suddenly you’re thinking, ‘Why does this always happen to me?’

Here’s the truth — that thought alone keeps you stuck.
When you think you’ve no control, your brain stops looking for solutions.
But when you flip it — and say, ‘What’s this teaching me?’ — your brain wakes up again.
And that’s when you move from being the passenger to being the driver of your own life.”

 3-Step Solution – How to Get Out of the Victim Seat

1️⃣ Notice it.
Catch yourself when you’re saying “always” or “never.”
Those words are a sure sign you’re giving away your power.
Example: “It’s always me that gets the bad shifts.” — Just notice that thought.

2️⃣ Name it.
Say to yourself, “Hold on — that’s my victim voice talking.”
When you name it, you separate from it.
You remind yourself — I have a choice.

3️⃣ Reframe it.
Ask, “If this was happening for me, not to me — what might it be showing me?”
Maybe it’s a lesson in boundaries, patience, or direction.
Either way — you’ve just taken your power back.

Manifesting isn’t magic — it’s mindset science.
 
 Here’s how it works: your brain is bombarded every second with millions of bits of information, and your subconscious is the filter. If you don’t direct that filter, it will just keep showing you more of the same — the habits, the patterns, the results you already have.
 
 But the brain has a superpower: neurons that fire together, wire together. Every time you repeat something with focus and emotion, you’re carving a new pathway. That’s how your brain learns to treat your intention as normal, natural, and achievable.
 
 Best way to make it stick? Use all of you:
 - Write your intention down.
 - Read it silently, then out loud.
 - Visualise it like it’s already yours.
 - Repeat daily.
 
 It’s like training a bloodhound — once you give it the scent, your brain will start spotting the opportunities, connections, and solutions that move you forward.
 
 That’s not wishful thinking. That’s neuroscience.
 
 And by the way — this isn’t just me saying it. Leading neurosurgeon and researcher Dr. Jim Doty has shown there’s no magic here, only the science of how your brain wires in your future.

3-Step Solution for Listeners →

Step 1: Write it down.
 Putting pen to paper signals seriousness to your brain.

Step 2: See it and say it.
 Read it silently, speak it aloud, and visualise it. The more senses involved, the stronger the imprint.

Step 3: Repeat daily.
 Repetition is the secret — just like lifting weights builds muscle, repeating your intention builds brain circuitry until your goal feels natural.

Which of these do you think people struggle with most?”

A) Saying ‘yes’ to something you don’t want to do, just to keep the peace.
B) Saying ‘no’ when you’d actually love to say yes, because you’re afraid of being judged.
C) Saying ‘I’m fine’ when the truth is you’re anything but fine.

3-Step Teaching 

1. Pretending creates pressure. Every time you go along with something you don’t mean, you add another weight to your shoulders.

  It’s like blowing up a balloon but never letting the air out. The more you pretend, the bigger the pressure — and sooner or later, it bursts.

2. Honesty feels risky — but it brings relief. 

The fear is “What if people don’t like it?” But in reality, telling the truth often earns you more respect and frees you from the mental gymnastics of keeping up the act.
 

It’s like ripping off a plaster. For a second it stings, but then the pain is gone and you can breathe again.

3. Real honesty builds real trust. 

When you drop the pretending, people know where they stand with you. 

That’s the foundation of strong relationships at home, at work, and especially with yourself.

 It’s like driving with clean windows instead of steamed-up glass. You and everyone else can see clearly, and that makes the journey safer and easier.

 3 Action Steps 

1. Notice where you’re saying ‘yes’ when you mean ‘no.’ This week, swap just one of those for honesty.

2. Practise a softer truth — instead of “I’m fine,” try “It’s been a tough day, but I’m getting through.”

3. Watch how people respond — you’ll see most lean in with respect and connection, not rejection.

  Book Recommendation

“Daring Greatly” by Brené Brown —  a down-to-earth book that shows how vulnerability, 

Anger often feels heavy, and it shows up differently depending on upbringing. Some people never show anger at all, while others flare up quickly. Both are learned responses, often rooted in childhood experiences with parents, teachers, or bullies.

Anger is rarely the root emotion. More often, it’s a cover for hurt, fear, or powerlessness. If raised around anger, you may have learned two patterns: • Avoid anger completely, because it felt unsafe. • Slip easily into anger, because it was modelled as normal. Understanding this helps us stop judging ourselves and start changing how we respond.

3 Practical Steps

1. STOP & STEP AWAY – Remove yourself briefly.

2. GROUND & BREATHE – Use deep breathing or 5-4-3-2-1 grounding.

3. REFRAME & RESPOND – Challenge your thoughts, choose a clearer response.

✨ Light: “Remember, anger is like hot coal — the longer you hold it, the more you get burned. Better to drop it before it singes your eyebrows!”

💙 Supportive: “Anger is just hurt in disguise. When you meet it with awareness instead of judgment, you set yourself free.”

Teaching Points

1.         Complaining = Giving Away Power — Nothing says, “life controls me” like narrating every inconvenience out loud.

2.         Rehearsing the Wrong Script — Every time you retell the same story of what went wrong, you’re just rehearsing being miserable.

3.         Energy Drain — You drain the room. Honestly, even the plants don’t want to be around you.

4.         Training Your Brain Badly — When you complain, you’re teaching your brain the wrong skills. Spotting problems gets easier, but spotting solutions gets harder.

5.         Momentum Killer — You stop your own progress. While you’re venting, the problem is still sitting there waiting for someone who’ll actually solve it.

3 Steps for you 

 Catch Yourself — Notice when you start to complain and pause.

 Flip It — Instead of replaying the problem, ask: What’s one small solution?

Shift the Energy — Share a win, a gratitude, or even a laugh — anything that moves you forward.

 

How to Complain Properly (When You Need To)

Complaining becomes destructive when it’s just venting. But when you complain with clarity, purpose, and respect — it’s not complaining anymore, it’s asserting yourself. Done well, it solves the problem instead of rehearsing it.

Be Clear, Not Emotional — State the facts without the drama. Instead of: “This is ridiculous, it always happens to me!”, try: “The service I received didn’t match what was promised.”

Ask for the Outcome You Want — Don’t just highlight what’s wrong — say what you’d like instead. For example: “I’d like a refund, or a replacement within the week.”

Stay Respectful but Firm — You can be calm and polite while still holding your ground. Respect gets you heard — aggression gets you ignored.

Closing  Quotes

“Complaining rehearses misery — gratitude rehearses freedom.”

“Don’t complain to rehearse the problem — complain to create the solution.”

So the SSS teaches the clever thing to do is to feel good — because when you feel good, you attract better-feeling things into your life. 

But we also  know that life  throws curveballs,  And that’s when “just feel good” can feel impossible. 

Here’s where the Stress Solution System thinking comes in: When we sleep,  our conscious mind turns off   

It’s the one time your mind stops resisting.  

This is your backdoor.- to the engine room -  aka subconscious install  

something powerful — and let it grow all night long! 

3-Step Listener Solution 

1. Plant the seeds before bed. Write down three things you want in the area of health,  

relationships, and finances — nine things in total. 

 Keep them believable but slightly out of 

reach,  

so they feel like a stretch and  also a possibility.  

Write them in first-person present tense: 

“I’m so happy and grateful  and I have an extra £500 5000 in my bank account. I love the security 

and freedom this gives me.” 

2. Turn it into a bedtime story. 

 Put your nine bullet points into a short, first-person story. 

Read it aloud to yourself as the last thing you do before turning out the light. 

3. Let your subconscious take over. As you fall asleep, your mind’s grip on negativity 

lets go naturally. You drift into the night holding this positive vision — and your 

subconscious starts making it real. 

PS Quote:  

“Your last thought at night is the first seed of tomorrow’s reality — plant it well.” 

This week’s Mindset Mastery Monday is all about lightness, fun, and the freedom to evolve into your best self (yes, even if that means turning into a bit of a hippie like Frank 

Deirdre dives into the magic of body-mind connection and why it’s not just a wellness buzzword — it’s the foundation of real, lasting change. From the joy of Belfast Pride to the incredible energy at HappyFest, this episode is a reminder that transformation doesn't have to be heavy. It can be joyful, playful, and even a little rebellious.

We also shine a spotlight on the amazing Ciara Daly, who’s helping bring real, grounded wellness leaders to the frontline — making mindset work more visible, more accessible, and more powerful than ever through the HappyFest event.

✨ If you’re ready to feel more freedom, more fun, and more fully yourself… hit play.

Don't forget you can get your own Freedom on the 14th September at Deirdre's event in the Merchant Hotel https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/the-freedom-event-tickets-1407342241529?utm-campaign=social&utm-content=attendeeshare&utm-medium=discovery&utm-term=listing&utm-source=cp&aff=ebdsshcopyurl

This week, Deirdre shares how breaking a bone in her foot forced her to slow down and face the frustration, fear, and vulnerability that came with it.

In this episode, you will learn:

• What frustration is really telling you.
• How anger often hides deeper feelings like fear or grief.
• Deirdre’s 3-step tool to shift your mindset when life interrupts your plans.

Sometimes the universe does not ask you to hustle it asks you to heal.
Tune in and discover how frustration can become your teacher, not your enemy.

Find out more about Deirdre’s Freedom Event (14th September 2025, Merchant Hotel) at DeirdreMaguire.com.

#MindsetMasteryMonday #DeirdreMaguire #FrustrationToFreedom

In this episode, we dive into the science behind why repetition is so powerful — and how it literally reshapes your brain. Frank and Deirdre explore Hebb’s Law: “Neurons that fire together, wire together,” and how this principle affects your habits, your reactions, and your growth.

You’ll learn:
💭 Why familiar patterns feel so automatic
🔁 How to interrupt unhelpful wiring
🧠 A 3-step tool to rewire your brain with intention

Whether it’s fear, self-doubt, or anxiety — you didn’t choose it, you wired it. And the best news? You can rewire something better.

Quote of the Day:
“Every time you think a thought, you’re training your brain. So be careful what class you’re attending.” – Deirdre Maguire

Tune in and train your brain on purpose.

U105 with Frank Mitchell

From mastering six gears in a camper van on Achill Island to navigating the emotional gears of life, Deirdre Maguire brings humour, wisdom, and clarity in this vibrant Monday morning chat with Frank Mitchell.

In this episode, Deirdre shares:

• Her hilarious motorhome adventure on the West of Ireland roads 
• A raw and real story about a Vespa incident that rattled her peace – and how she used mindset tools to reset in the moment
• Why envy isn’t something to be ashamed of, but something to lean into – it’s showing you what you deeply desire
• Her two-step mindset mastery tool for transforming envy into action
• A powerful reframe:
  "Envy is the art of seeing what’s possible for you, disguised as someone else’s success."

This is your sign to stop scrolling, stop shaming yourself, and start following the breadcrumbs toward what you truly want.

Because clarity is power. And envy is trying to hand it to you.

Learn more: www.deirdremaguire.com

Want to be in the room where change happens?
Join Deirdre at The Freedom Event – Sunday, 14th September at The Merchant Hotel, Belfast.
A day for breakthroughs, clarity, and lasting change.
https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/the-freedom-event-tickets-1407342241529?utm-campaign=social&utm-content=attendeeshare&utm-medium=discovery&utm-term=listing&utm-source=cp&aff=ebdsshcopyurl

The more you rehearse the worst-case scenario in your mind, the more your nervous system believes it's real.
 Heart racing. Breath shallow. Muscles tense.
 You're not in danger — but your brain thinks you are.
 And when that happens, even the tiniest step forward can feel impossible.

But here’s the breakthrough:
If fear is built through repetition — then so is confidence.

If you can visualise failure, you can visualise victory.
 If you can rehearse disaster, you can also rehearse domination.

The battlefield isn’t “out there.”
 It’s in here
The voice in your head might be loud, but it doesn’t always tell the truth.

 Fear isn’t your limit — it’s your signal. 

It’s the flag waving at the edge of your growth.

3-Step Mindset Tool: Rehearse Bravery, Not Breakdown

1. Flip the Script

If you can imagine falling… try imagining landing.
Tell a better story in your mind — where you speak and you’re heard.
Where you leap and you rise.
Where you fail and grow stronger for it.

Tool: Say aloud: “This is a signal, not a stop sign.”

2. Get Comfortable with the Uncomfortable

Fear shrinks with exposure, not avoidance.
 It gets louder the more you ignore it.
 But when you take action — even shaking, even scared — it loses its power.

Tool: Do something small today that scares you — send the email, say the truth, show up.

3. Rewire Through Repetition

The first time is terrifying.
 The 10th time is tolerable.
 The 100th time? 

3It's freedom.
 The brave ones didn’t start brave — they started scared and kept going.

Tool: Ask: What fear needs exposure today?
Don’t wait for courage. Act — and let courage meet you there.

 PS (Closing Quote):

“Fear doesn’t go away. You just stop flinching when it speaks.”
 The only way out… is through.

 “Today on Mindset Mastery Monday – How to Kill Fear at the Source and Take Back the Mic in Your Mind.”

We think: When/then 

When I have the money, 

then I’ll feel relaxed, confident, happy.

But what if the real formula for wealth – and life – is the other way round?

Most people live in this order:
Have → Do → Be
 “Once I have the time/money/energy… then I’ll do what I want, and I’ll be happy.”
 But that doesn’t work — because it waits for life to change before you do.

 ‘The Science of Getting Rich’ by Wallace D. Wattles.

 It’s not just about money. 

It’s about living a rich life — in every sense. Confidence. Peace. Purpose. Joy.
 

🔁 The Real Formula Is:

Be → Do → Have

 1.Choose who you want to be now.

 2.Act from that energy.

 3.And then the results come.

 Example: you want to feel more confident. “Once I lose the weight… or earn more… or get the relationship… then I’ll be confident.”
 
  Decide to be confident now?
 What would change? Your posture, your choices, your conversations?
 That energy makes you act differently – and that creates different results.
 
 It’s not

 fake-it-till-you-make-it. 

It’s:

Be it till you see it

 3-Step Listener Takeaway:

Be → Do → Have
 1. BE – Pick your identity today. Calm? Capable? Courageous? Choose it now.
 2. DO – Let that version of you take the next action – even a small one.
 3. HAVE – Watch what changes as you embody the person you’re becoming.

- Frank, ever done something bold just because you felt like someone who could?
 - Would you agree most people wait too long for life to give them permission?
 - What would U105 listeners say if we asked them: Who are you ready to be — starting today?

 Final Thought:

This isn’t just about being rich with money.
 It’s about being rich in mindset, 

 and in how you show up in your life.
 When you lead with who you want to be, everything else starts to catch up.

💬 Easy Closing Quote:

“You don’t get what you want. You get who you are.” – Unknown

Most people believe pain is purely physical – caused by injury, wear and tear, or genetics.
 But what if pain is actually your *body’s way of expressing what your mind can’t*?
 
 According to Dr. John Sarno and Nicole Sachs, chronic pain is often a protective distraction – a brilliant trick the brain uses to keep us from feeling uncomfortable emotions like rage, sadness, shame, or grief. This is called TMS – Tension Myoneural Syndrome.
 

 Their message is clear:
 Your pain is real – but its root is emotional, not structural.
 
 when we give ourselves permission to feel and express our emotions safely and honestly, the pain no longer needs to “speak for us.”

 Practical Examples:

 For example, Michael’s migraines would spike during family conflicts. Once he acknowledged repressed anger toward his father and tapped into that story, the migraines lost their grip.

 Jane had chronic back pain for years – MRI scans showed nothing. After starting expressive journaling and emotional release work, her pain significantly eased.

 3-Step Mindset Tool: How to Listen to Your Pain and Let It Go

1. Acknowledge It Without Fear

Instead of fighting pain or fearing it, gently say: “I see you. I hear you. I know you’re trying to protect me.” This interrupts the fear-pain-fear cycle.

2. Feel to Heal

Give yourself a safe space to express the emotion underneath. Ask: “What is my pain trying to distract me from?” Let yourself write, speak, cry, or tap it out.

3. Rewire the Story

Shift the belief from “There’s something wrong with me” to: “My body is wise. I’m listening now.” 

Use  affirmations, to calm the nervous system and update the message.

 Call to Action:

This week, instead of silencing your pain—get curious. Journal, tap, or simply sit with it. Ask: “What truth is this pain pointing me toward?”

💬 PS Quote to End With:

“Your symptoms are not the problem. They’re your body’s way of trying to get your attention.” – Nicole Sachs 

“Invisible Weights: What Are You Carrying That’s Not Yours?” 

What if your stress isn’t even yours? 

We explore the invisible emotional weight you’ve been lugging around—and how to finally put it down.

We carry a lot—responsibilities, expectations, roles we never asked for. But some of the heaviest weights aren’t visible at all. They’re emotional hand-me-downs: guilt, shame, worry… Not yours, but inherited, absorbed, or assigned. And they drain our joy.

Today is your permission slip to *put it down*. You can still love people, be there for them, and care deeply—without carrying their pain as your own.

3-Step Mindset Tool: How to Drop the Weight That’s Not Yours

1. Notice the Load Ask: “Is this mine?” Whether it's guilt, stress, or emotional exhaustion—pause and check: *Did I create this? Or did I absorb it?*

2. Name the Pattern Are you the fixer, the peacekeeper, the over-giver? Identifying your default role helps you change the script.

3. Return to Sender With love and respect, you can energetically release what’s not yours. Say it: *“This is not mine to carry. I set it down with love.”*

When it comes to saying sorry, which sounds most like you, 

A. “Sorry, I'm breathing.” You apologise for everything, even things that aren't your fault.  

B.“Sorry, not sorry.” You avoid apologising unless absolutely necessary. 

C. “I'm sorry but” you say it but it comes with a built-in excuse. 

D. “I own it”. You apologise clearly, kindly and without losing your dignity. 

  
 Main Message: 
We’ve all been there – stuck between our pride and the pit in our stomach that says, “I should make this right.” 
 
But here’s the truth: Apologising doesn’t make you weak – it makes you wise. 
It’s not about grovelling. It’s about growth. 
It’s not about giving away your power. It’s about owning your impact. 
 
3-Step Mindset Tool: How to Apologise with Power (Not People-Pleasing) 
1. Pause Before You Apologise 
Ask yourself: Am I apologising because I’ve hurt someone? Or because I feel uncomfortable with conflict? 
A real apology needs to come from clarity, not guilt. 
 
Reframe: “What’s the most respectful way I can take responsibility here?” 
 
Example: You snapped at your partner after a stressful day. Instead of blurting "Sorry, I'm just tired!", pause, reflect, and say, "I’m sorry I took that out on you – that wasn’t fair." 
 
2. Drop the 'But' 
"I'm sorry *but* I was tired." 
"I'm sorry *but* you started it." 
That tiny word cancels everything before it. 
 
A powerful apology sounds like: 
“I’m sorry for how that came across. It wasn’t my intention, but I can see how it affected you.” 
 
Example: A work colleague was hurt by your comment. Instead of saying, "I'm sorry, but you were being oversensitive," say, "I'm sorry my words landed that way – I didn’t mean to hurt you." 
 
3. Don’t Lose Yourself in the Apology 
You can be sorry for what happened without making yourself wrong as a person. 
 
Healthy mindset: “That wasn’t okay – and I want to make it right.” 
 
Example: You missed a friend’s event. Don’t say, "I'm the worst friend ever!" Instead: "I'm sorry I missed it. I really care and want to hear all about it." 
 
Psychology Behind Apology Patterns 
Why some people can’t apologise: 
- Deep shame or fear of being wrong 
- Belief that mistakes equal failure or rejection 
- Childhood conditioning: “If I’m wrong, I’m unlovable.” 
 
Example: Someone who can never say sorry at work because they believe admitting fault will make them look weak or incompetent. They might deflect, blame others, or minimise the issue instead. 
 
 
Why some people apologise all the time: 
- Habitual people-pleasing 
- Fear of conflict or abandonment 
- Internalised low self-worth: “Sorry I exist.” 
- Socialised to be small, agreeable, or not take up space 
 
Example: Someone constantly says "sorry" for asking a question, expressing an opinion, or even just walking past someone. It's less about the situation and more about feeling unworthy of taking up space. 
 
The key question to ask yourself: 
“What’s behind my apology strategy?” 
 
Is it healing or hiding? Am I seeking connection or avoiding discomfort? 
 
Apologising isn’t just about manners. It’s about mindset. 
 
📚Recommended Reading: 
“The Gifts of Imperfection” by Brené Brown 
A foundational read for anyone who over-apologises due to shame, perfectionism, or not feeling “enough.” 
Key insight: You don’t have to hustle for your worth. Owning your truth is where your power lies. 
 
Quote: “Owning our story and loving ourselves throug

“What in your life are you a beginner at these days?” When was the last time you did something Something that made you feel like beginner all over again?

If we only play the games we know we can win, life gets smaller.

The power of being *rubbish* at something new

— and why it might just be the secret to staying alive inside.

The Problem:

As we get older, we stick with what we know.

We don’t want to look silly.

We shrink We only play the games we *know* we can win.

And slowly… our lives get smaller. Safer. Staler.

Core Message:

Growth doesn’t live in mastery — it lives in messy beginnings. The willingness to be a beginner again is how we stay ‘alive !’

3 Mindset Moves to Reignite Beginner Energy:

1. Ask yourself: What haven’t I done “yet”?

Write a list. Painting? Dancing? Coding? Spanish?

Let curiosity lead.

2. Normalise the awkward stage.

If you feel awkward

congrats, you’re doing it right!

3. Share your beginner stories. There’s power in saying, “I’m learning.” It keeps you humble, open and interesting.

Bonus: it gives others permission to begin too.

Call to Action:

This week, try something new — not to be good at it, but to feel the joy of *beginning again*.

Pick up the pen.

Book the class.

Join the dance floor.

P.S. Quote to Close:

“If you only do what you already know how to do, you will never grow.”

In the busyness of life—deadlines, routines, responsibilities—it’s easy to forget that joy and laughter are not luxuries, they’re essential. What if I told you that adding just a bit of playfulness into your day can lift your mood, boost your health, and even make you more productive?

Step 1: The Benefits of Playfulness

Research shows playfulness can: - Reduce stress - Boost creativity - Strengthen relationships - And increase happiness

When we play, we’re present. Whether it's a hobby, a joke, or simply goofing around—play gives the mind a break and the heart a lift.

Step 2: Letting Go of Seriousness

As adults, we often wear a 'serious hat' all the time. But here's the truth—taking life too seriously can weigh us down. By lightening up, not sweating the small stuff, and letting our inner child out to play, we make room for joy in the everyday.

Step 3: Fun Activities to Try This Week

Here are a few easy ways to bring more fun into your week: 1. Play a game – Board games, card games, even charades with the family. 2. Try something new – A class, a creative hobby, even dancing in your kitchen. 3. Laugh more – Watch a comedy, hang out with a funny friend, or just look for the humour in the little things.

Quote (Deirdre):

"We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing." – George Bernard Shaw So here’s your Mindset Mastery message today: Don’t wait for fun—create it. A little laughter can go a long way.