Black Boomer Besties from Brooklyn
This is what the world needs now: two free-thinking “seasoned” Black women speaking their truth and inspiring others to do the same. Shaped by 45 years of friendship that began at the prestigious Brooklyn Technical High School through the Ivy League, medical school, marriages, divorces, triumphs, parenting queer children, life-threatening illness and many many amazing adventures. Each week, besties Leslie Osei-Tutu and Angella Fraser will push against boundaries in love, culture, careers, faith, politics and out-dated assumptions about women of a certain age. Remember, you’re never too old to change your mind…or your hair! (but more on that later :-)All views are our own and do not reflect the views of our institution/company. Information provided is not intended to serve as medical advice.
Black Boomer Besties from Brooklyn
Extraordinary Female Friendships with Kim Coles
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Did you know that the Besties have another Bestie? It’s actor, comedian, author and coach Kim Coles. As the dear friend she is, she came onto Black Boomer Besties from Brooklyn podcast when we were wee podcasters. So in celebration of her new podcast with her Living Single costar Erika Alexander, we thought we would replay our conversation with her when she closed out our first season.
Then enjoy Kim's new podacst:
Judging by the Pilot | S1 E1 | ReLiving Single Podcasthttps://youtu.be/QLJYkF3b7QY?si=S4utV8iYcmkvN9rc
Visit Black Boomer Besties from Brooklyn website for behind-the-scenes extras.
Mother's Day Reflections
Speaker 1Hey Ange , hey Les , How's , it ?
Speaker 2going .
Speaker 1Happy Mother's Day .
Speaker 2Thank you . Thank you , Happy Mother's Day to you .
Speaker 1Happy .
Speaker 2Mother's Day to you , yeah .
Speaker 1Let me tell you what's funny about Mother's Day . I was talking to either my aunt or my grandmother today , right , and they were asking you know , what are you doing ? What did you do today ? And I'm like you know , when you're young , you want to make every party . You want to really be in there and whatever , and I'm like I am having a glorious day doing nothing .
Speaker 3I mean it's like what a privilege so good To have my feet up .
Speaker 1I even watch TV and you know I'm not a TV watcher , I know , but I was watching like a couple of Great day .
Speaker 2So good , kai calls me this morning . Mom , are you out and about like gallivanting out there today ? I'm like hell , no Hell no , yes .
Speaker 1What do you want for Mother's Day ? Peace .
Speaker 2I said listen to what I'm doing . I'm eating my rum , raisin and grape nut ice cream that I got yesterday and just savoring every moment of it .
Speaker 1It's just simple things . I had chocolate chip today . It's just simple things . And eight leftovers . It was glorious , I got to tell you , I gotta tell you , I gotta tell you . So , welcome to another episode of Black Boomer . Besties from Brooklyn .
Speaker 2I'm Angela and that's Leslie , my best friend of almost 50 years . We are two free-thinking 60-something-year-old Black women who have decided to be more bold and joyful about life , and we invite you to come along with us . Today we're going to be talking about extraordinary female friendships . And outside of this friend couple here , we have other really close friends , one of which is the amazing comedian , Kim Coles , and we wanted to talk about Kim and Erica Alexander's new podcast today and introduce you to that and also to share with you an episode that we did with Kim many seasons ago .
Speaker 2So you get to see how we interact . What an extraordinary female friendship looks like . This new podcast .
Speaker 1I listen to it . It's called Reliving Single . Reliving Single because , as you , know Living Single because as you know , Erica Alexander and Kim Coles were two of the leads on the show from the 90s Living Single .
Speaker 2Living Single .
Speaker 1I tell you , one of the things that was just so wonderful listening to the podcast is that we were clearly like she was part of our lives then , on screen and personally . So just hearing the backstory about what she was going through and then we have our own history of her at the time , it just brings back such great memories . And I can't believe the show aired almost 30 years ago .
Speaker 2It was actually 32 years ago , because on their 30th anniversary , the strike was going on .
Speaker 1So they really couldn't talk about anything having to do with the show .
Speaker 2So it's been 32 years and what this podcast is about is they're ? Actually talking about the backstory , but they are going through every episode and talking about the backstory . It's like you'll never watch it the same again . Yes , so the first episode was um . The first podcast episode was on march I'm sorry , may 7th , so it's still um pretty new . We encourage you guys to watch it .
Speaker 1Enjoy it's mesmerizing even though we know kim .
Speaker 2We've known her forever . It is mesmerizing like , like what , what that was going on ? What , who ?
Speaker 1did what ? Yes ?
Speaker 2Really , it's one of those .
Speaker 1Now here's some of the things that I was thinking , because , again , we've known Kim almost 50 years , like we've known each other . You know , we all went to Brooklyn Tech together and that's when we met in 1977 . We met in 1977 . So I'm thinking , like the Kim that I know for all these years , and she's talking and she's like a badass . She's going up to Les Moonves , you know , the head of the . It wasn't .
Speaker 2Miramax , but the head of the network .
Speaker 1Whatever the company was , yes , and negotiating with him .
Speaker 2and asking for what he wants , and I'm like what Kim was , a boss Back like that .
Speaker 1You know it's like .
Speaker 2Back like that , back like that , wow . And let me make a slight correction , because I spoke to Kim today actually , and so I met Kim in 1976 . That's when we started high school , before I met leslie , and actually kim was my first high school best friend . But guess what happened ?
Speaker 1what I know . After the first year I sidled up and said wait a minute because I moved into , into .
Speaker 2I moved really close to where Kim lives .
Speaker 1And so we would yeah .
Speaker 2So my mom would drive us to school or we'd take a bus together , whatever . But , kim , you were cheating on me . I was cheating , but it was . Is it cheating if it's before we met ? I don't think it's cheating .
Speaker 1Theoretically .
Speaker 2Yes , I don't think it's . I don't think it's cheating Theoretically yes ,
Introducing Kim Coles' New Podcast
Speaker 2I don't think it's cheating . But Kim went into politics , she became the class president like all four years , all four years .
Speaker 1So she went into that .
Speaker 2She became like a twirler , so she was hanging out with the football team I was being a geek . Leslie was a geek . So , sophomore year we just got . I mean , we never stopped being friends , of course , but Leslie and I just had more things in common . And guess what ? She knew how to sew and I could sew .
Speaker 1Exactly , she could sew , so I knuckled in .
Speaker 2So anyway , yeah , so we really want you to watch and also listen to our episode . It was when we were wee young podcasters , we were I don't know . I listened to it . I'm like , oh my gosh , I can't believe we kept going .
Speaker 1It's so funny because when I listened back to our season one and season two , it was like we were so green ? First of all , why would we even ask Kim Coles to be in our podcast ? We didn't know what the heck we were doing back then she was so gracious and we were happy , obviously , to have her . We did our best . But remember how many times we would have to do a take and like all right , let's start all over again . We've improved . We've improved .
Speaker 2Yeah , we've gotten a little better .
Speaker 1And the other thing that I'd like to say . In fact I left a message on Kim's answer machine yesterday , but I meant to say to her we did this podcast thing first .
Speaker 2Yes , we sure did . We went there first . We sure did . Now , you know how competitive I am ? Yes , she's a biter . You know how competitive I am ?
Speaker 1Yes , she's a biter . So I'm like Kim . You may have hundreds of thousands of listeners already in a week , but we did it first .
Speaker 2We did it first and , for those of you who are interested , if you go to where is it ? I wrote it down somewhere because I'm really petty , because I'm really petty , because I'm really petty , because I'm really petty , she actually mentions our high school , brooklyn Technical High School , on the first episode of the podcast .
Speaker 1Yes , Of her podcast , season one , episode one , and it was kind of maybe at 11 , 1130 .
Speaker 2That's where she mentions it .
Speaker 1I thought she was going to mention me .
Speaker 2Oh I , where she mentions it . I thought she was going to mention me . She actually said , when she talks about her , her friendships , her extraordinary friendships , we're . We're in the mix , so we're in there . We're in there , we're in . And she promised to be back on our podcast to support us , because that's just , that's just who she is . It's always been this way , and yeah , so listen and let us know what you think .
Speaker 1Yeah . So I just want to make a couple more comments about some of the thoughts that I had while I was listening to the podcast , because she speaks about the episodes as they were being taped and the mindset and what was going on on the set and with the actors and all and me . I was on the periphery . You know I would visit Kim in LA while she was still shooting .
Speaker 2And .
Speaker 1I remember she gave me a hat and I still have the jacket and I used to drive around in her convertible Mercedes and I used to drive around in her convertible .
Speaker 2Mercedes .
Speaker 1Now in 93 , I didn't have two nickels to put together whatever . No , omari was five years old at the time . I was struggling financially and this and that , and I would go to LA and live like I'm a celebrity around in Beverly Hills with in a convertible Mercedes and it was like I just , I just remember , you know , being part of her life like that , and I'm thinking and being just so proud of her yeah , always . You know this person that I had known at this point what 20 years at that point , you know almost .
Speaker 1And it was just yeah .
Speaker 2That's how you live abundantly , whether there is money involved or not . That's what that is . Yeah , well , yeah , through your friendships and all that's it .
Speaker 1That's what met TC obviously .
Speaker 2I've met Erica Alexander , yeah , so I've , you know , known some of these folks .
Speaker 1So I see them on TV and in reruns and all of that , and I'm like wow .
Speaker 2This is really cool . It's really cool , all right . So , guys , what you're going to be hearing next is our episode with our another bestie , kim Coles
Brooklyn Tech Memories
Speaker 2. Hey , les .
Speaker 1Hey Ange , how are you ? Oh , I'm pretty good , but all right . My energy sounds a little lower than it actually is because I'm really trying to contain myself . I am so excited why are you so excited ?
Speaker 2I'm not going to let you suffer , not a moment longer . So let's both introduce hey .
Speaker 3Kim introduce hey cam , hey , hey , I am delighted and honored and overjoyed to be here . I am so proud of the two of you . It is a delight to have your voices in my head , other than the other voices in my head , on a regular basis , and you all are delicious together and I know that people are loving it . I know the numbers are growing and I'm just so excited for what you created . It's really delicious and beautiful and a beautiful testament and testimony to your friendship and love .
Speaker 2Thank you so much . I have two quick things to say . One of them is when Leslie and I have talked about our high school , brooklyn Technical High School , right , and I think we mentioned Brooklyn . Oh , we didn't even introduce . Hey guys , welcome to the final episode of our first season of Black .
Speaker 1Boomer Besties from Brooklyn . That's because we're so excited . That's why .
Speaker 2We're so excited Because we have our first guest . Here's the thing that I want to say about the high school that we went to . To this day , our inner circle of friends are friends from Brooklyn Tech period . So the fact that we've got multiple besties is just a part of being from the tech , in particular , that the class of 1980 . Right , because it , just because it just is , because it just is . So that's one thing I wanted to say . The other thing I want to say is that Kim Coles has been entertaining us since we were 14 years old without fail since 1976 , without fail .
Speaker 2If she had not given us hush money , we would be able to tell you so many things , so many juicy bits that you know we've been paid handsomely not to tell . So we're not going to take it any further , but you know , if you pay more , we may , we may talk .
Speaker 1We may talk . Actually , I'm going to renege on that . So send your money to Leslie Ose Tutu at DM me .
Speaker 3I say DM me , keep the hush money you received and go ahead and tell the stories . I want to remember what you did and didn't do . Good times , oh my gosh . Good times Always .
Speaker 2Always good times and you might not know , but Kim , for all four years that we were there .
Speaker 3right , kim was student body president , I was class president , class president , yeah , you know , as I always say , it wasn't because I had any policies or programs or politics . I was just like , hey , vote for me and I'll make you laugh . And because everyone there was so smart , and so you know , like you know , some had pocket , like like this is the pocket protecting bunch . Yeah , super , super smart and super super . You know , so many were , you know , serious and intense , and you know , and so I . It was easy , all I had to do was like I'm just gonna make you laugh . They're like okay , and then we vote , and uh , so I didn't do anything other than make people laugh .
Speaker 2Well , that's a whole lot . That's a whole lot right , because that's like the light and laughter that you continue to bring to the world . It's been beautiful to watch you and we still get choked up when we see you perform . It's still like , you know , like they do . Oh my gosh , that's our girl right there and you know I'm like , oh , oh , she makes it look so easy .
Speaker 1We need you more now than ever you know , we really do , we need laughter .
Speaker 3We need your energy , we need your love and I just I've I felt it for more than 45 years , so you know thank you for and and I want to say to everyone who's listening , I'm , I'm a stand and I'm I'm an evangelist for joy and for tapping into joy , finding joy , finding the joy in every situation that you can , finding the lightness and finding the God of your understanding is always there and that's where the joy and the bliss and the love is . And again , like you said , we need it now more than ever . There's so much that's going on out there . It's our job , our responsibility , to handle keeping as much joy as possible available in our world and in the worlds that we impact . Yeah , absolutely .
Speaker 2Absolutely true . So there is a special reason we were going to have Kim on anyway . Because you know why not ? I mean , she's one of our besties but also because , as we bring our season one to a close , this is the last episode of our season one . I think Leslie and I said it last episode that we really intentionally made season one be about getting to know who Leslie and I are right . So we got pretty personal about who we are and you've heard us talk a lot about the right brain , left brain thing and you know , just kind of poking fun at each other . And we wanted to bring Kim on as the last episode of the season because she's got this fascinating , good choice of word , huh . She's got this fascinating program that evaluates one's . I don't know if is it a personality , what is it that is evaluated ?
Speaker 3Well , I became what we call a fascination certified advisor . I'm certified in the system of fascination . It was discovered by a woman named Sally Hogshead and it's actually based on science , and so it's the first personality tests that tests how the world sees you rather than how the world , and the whole premise behind it is that when you discover how you communicate at your best , you can then go ahead and be the most authentic version of you , and for those of us who are in business or work with teams , it's really about celebrating your uniqueness and celebrating that different is better than better , and wait , excuse me , pause on that .
Speaker 2Please say that again . Say that again .
Speaker 3So we live in a world that's that's commodity , what's the commodity ? Commoditization is too many , too many syllables . But in a world that's competitive and we're all trying to be seen and heard and stand out in the way that we want to stand out , that different is better than better . So isn't that great ? So , rather than trying to be better than someone , because who decides what better is ?
Speaker 3But different , being your unique , you know , I like to say perfectly imperfect self , is all that is needed for such a time . And so what if we're taught now , what if we are empowered now , I should say , to dial up
Flashback: Kim Coles Episode Begins
Speaker 3what makes us us ? Then you , you remove the necessary , you know , permission to . I'm not saying you can't still improve and work on things and and and strive for something more , but to just be more of yourself . It could be said that just being more of yourself might be just enough , might be all you need to do in order to stand out , to make a difference , to show your value and to celebrate your mission and message for the world . That's , that's the fascination .
Speaker 1Yeah , I'll tell you why that's so deep . Because what's coming up for me is in my years and years of conversations with Ange and her work with diversity and inclusion and the beauty and value of having non-homogeneous groupings of people in workplaces and in settings and things like that , les , do you actually ?
Speaker 1listening . I actually listen once in a while , baby . Once in a while it comes through . But so listen how you've told me that diversity of thought , of character , and everybody brings their it to the table and it's just incredible that more people in the C-suites and managers don't really get that , yeah , yeah , that's so true , that's so true .
Speaker 3This system was created by Sally Hogshead , as I mentioned , and it's also about personal branding as well and the work was created so that people and teams could work together best and teams could work together best . So imagine you have a huge , you know company or huge team of people working and you know . Now , with this fascination work , you get a chance to find out how each one of these people uniquely fascinates others , how they uniquely communicate , and then you can empower them to do their best work . So if you've got somebody in accounting and they are a comedian or they're passionate and they're the life of the party and they have great ideas , but yet you're relegating them to be with their abacus , counting the numbers and they're good at it , yes , but also empower them and also unlock their greatness in other ways so that you can work better as a team . So , you know , part of this work is how do you already fascinate the world , how are you already you know , how is your personality already adding distinct value ?
Speaker 2and then celebrating that and calling that to the table , going great where we can be even better together , kind of delve into is how Leslie and I's reports what they look like and how much of it is consistent or inconsistent with the way that we've been presenting ourselves as left brain , right brain , and so I am so excited to jump in , jump in .
Speaker 1Who wants to go first ? I'm a little afraid . As usual , you're so skittish . Self-discovery is a little hard for me , but okay well .
Speaker 3Well , here's the good news about this work is that every last one of the archetypes there's 49 archetypes and they are all yummy and they're all you know when I first found this work years ago and I was so committed to becoming a coach're all you know when I first found this work years ago and I was so committed to becoming a coach in , in and , and you know , becoming certified in this . This is in addition to Hollywood and all that other stuff . That's great . This I love because people have an opportunity to be seen and heard and you're going to , you're going to hear things . You go , wait a minute . That is how I do what I do and it's it's me . It felt life-affirming . So I don't have to pretend to be anything else . I show up as me and it's like the , the .
Speaker 3You know the road will rise up to meet me and , yeah , yeah yeah , so I'm going to start with you , leslie , since you seem to be
The Fascination Assessment Revealed
Speaker 3a little reticent . Well , so wait till you hear your name . I'm going to tell you your new name . Your advantage is your , I'm sorry , your archetype is you are the change agent .
Speaker 2Don't that sound good ? Go Leslie .
Speaker 3Go , go , go Leslie , go , go , go , Leslie . Your advantages are power and innovation . I'm going to give you just you know I wasn't going to add this to the mix , but let me just give you this . I'm going to tell you two things that I that I love , love , love about this . Number one you have a twin , so I can call you either the change agent or I can call you You're going to love this the maverick leader . Oh , not the maverick leader .
Speaker 1Yeah , yeah , yeah , I want the maverick leader . Okay . Ml for short , ML for short , the maverick . Doesn't that sound good ? No , and I'll allow you to call me maverick , okay .
Speaker 3No , no , and I'll allow you to call me maverick . Okay , no longer leslie . There's no love . The maverick leader . Now here's what's really cool about this ?
Speaker 1is that my excuse me ? Excuse me , okay , dr maverick leader maverick leader .
Speaker 3Here's what's hysterical about that . I have another doctor maverick leader in my life and it's my boyfriend . Oh , my ej is the boss and we call him the boyfriend of sweetness is also the maverick leader . So when I pulled your report , I was like , oh , your sister-in-law is . Let's just talk about how you communicate already , leslie . So the power advantage means that if you all hear some pages flipping in the background , that's because I'm um , it's the most effective way of of communication . You are inventive , untraditional and self-propelled . Um , right , you are those things independent , witty , sharp . You have a strong drive to come up with a different approach and you can let me know if this resonates with you . Or you can look in your life where this , um , this pops up . I'm going to share a story with you in just a moment . I'm like oh , my goodness , I get it . This is where it shows up . You bring alternative opinions to dull meetings and fresh ideas to stale companies . Is that you ?
Speaker 2it is I want to talk about that a little bit later on , when you finish .
Speaker 3You're not afraid to be different . When you get on a roll , you can bring people in with a flurry of untraditional approaches . Your energy and direction gives you the power to inspire other people to be innovative as well . So the term power , you know it has a connotation of of you know . You know , you know clicking down the hallway with her high heel shoes , which you may do , you know ruling . But the truth is that true power , when it's when it's wielded in a particular way , is to create space for others to shine and do well . Let me just go through a few other things . I want to get to your um , um , your resourceful and artistic um . You're unafraid to go against the grain . You have creativity , ideas flowing . You , uh , your communication style is bold . I've always been so impressed with you . You succinctly , have always enunciate your words . You always have and you're just . I can hear you clearly in my head anytime . I even think about you . Clever , charming , good humor . I have a hundred more adjectives .
Speaker 1Okay , but I get it , I get it .
Speaker 2Can I remind you of something , les ? Remember this is identifying how people see you , and I know that what your Judge , judy , is saying to you now maybe that those things that you are not those , the ways that we see ourselves , we are our harshest critic and I really want you to do your best to let the stuff go down to your toes , because I know that you may be having . I know that you may be having because we talked about , like you know , I don't like my voice or you know , and I'm the same way . I'm not saying that you know you're the only one who's like this , but Kim is talking about how people see you .
Speaker 3Yeah Well , let's ask her how this ?
Speaker 1how is this landing with you ? Do you see that , you ? How is this landing with you ? It's well , one thing I find it pretty interesting because , Kim , you've known me all my life and some of these things are exactly the way that you've described me years and years ago . I don't know how much you , you know , have remembered or thought about that yet , but , oh my gosh , it's really something else .
Speaker 3But not trying . You know , we all know people , and women in particular , who are trying to be a boss chick , that's , you know .
Speaker 1But no , you've never told me that you've never uh said that you had that impression .
Speaker 3It was actually some of the other adjectives that you said from like high school you know , felt very much in command of your , of your femininity , your command of your self . You , you , yeah , yeah , and even though listen , all of us have our unshakable moments on the inside , but you , you were confident and you were attractive , not only because you're so beautiful , but you were attractive because there was an energy of , of , of confidence and and oldness , but also allowing others to be who , who they are . You know , you seemed very allowing , even though you didn't like my glitter nail polish . She will never forgive you for that .
Speaker 2Then I saw you with glitter nail polish .
Speaker 3I was like oh , I love that , I love that , I love that I love that . But you know .
Speaker 1One thing that I find so wonderful about this fascination assessment is that here I am perceived have gone for all these years .
Speaker 3You know they've been consistent . Yeah , wow , say this , you know , when I was reminded while listening to and Andrew , we're going to get to you and then I'm going to double back . So again , you are power and innovation . Innovation is right . Innovation is right . I do ideas . Power is , you know , power is the language of leading with command , but not demand command , which is very different .
Speaker 3And the story of you deciding I'm going to med school at 36 and you know , it's done more and more and more as the years have gone by . But you were like you said , I was the oldest person in my class and I , but I was determined to do it , and and and you did it . And then I heard on the episode I forgot about the award that you won just by showing up and being the , the best , not competitive , but being compassionate . Yeah , I'm just . I know that your patients are better for having you in their lives because , um , because you're in their life and um . Volumes about you and and the way you crafted a way for you to be able to do it and an opportunity for your son and his father to spend time together , while you know all this was all happening . That took great innovation . There are many who would have said I can't do this . And you , you , you did the ultimate for everyone's life involved , and that's thank you , love .
Speaker 3Thank you all right , let's hear about ang okay , I'm to double back to the tertiary in a minute , because you're going to love this . So , ange , angela is the catalyst . Catalyst , I'm going to tell you your twin . Okay , your twin is the rock star . Wait a minute now . So , my dear , you are um .
Speaker 3You lead with passion and innovation . Passion and innovation . So that means that both of you have innovation in common . So , of course , a podcast is perfect , of course , showing others how a decades long friendship can thrive and grow and change and grow again . That's innovative . You know , when we hear stories of women not getting along , I don't have any women like that in my life . Yeah , ditto , like what do you mean ? Women aren't getting along , what do you mean ? Only women who support each other , but that's another story . So , of course , the innovation is working .
Speaker 3So you are out of the box , social and energizing , and , as the rock star , you are bold , artistic and unorthodox , and so notice how there's , there's that cross . You know that you all have together . Passion is the language of relationships . No , I'm sorry , passion is the language of emotion . Passion is the language of relationships . No , I'm sorry , passion is the language of emotion . And you absolutely do lead with your whole throbbing heart all the time you always have and you always have , and so the world sees you . This is how the world sees you . Okay , you make a vibrant first impression . Oh , my goodness .
Speaker 3Yes , you are valued for your enthusiastic approach and ability ability to generate ideas . I'm certain that when you were in your corporate corporate world , when you walked in the boardroom , they're like , okay , now we can get started , here we go . Now we can get started , here we go . I'm certain . And social . You embrace
Celebrating Uniqueness and Grace
Speaker 3new situations and relationships with zeal . I've watched you do that for as long as I've known you as well . You have you know . I've watched your curiosity as people from different walks of life or different cultures would come in and you'd be willing to learn about them and incorporate . You know how do you , how do you talk and it just really important . You speak with flair and you use expressive gestures . You know how to captivate an audience . You're named the catalyst because you add value by starting action . Wow .
Speaker 2Whoa . As in this podcast , as in this , podcast .
Speaker 1As in this podcast , our producer .
Speaker 3You know you often your creative spirit . You often dislike repetitive , linear tasks . However , you know you won't talk about this right brain , left brain thing . You know , angie , I've absolutely seen you in your . You know you won't talk about this right brain , left brain thing . You know , angie , I've absolutely seen you in your . You know this . What is the thing that you create and you put it on the wall ? You engineer things . You're an engineer , left brain for sure , creative Absolutely .
Speaker 3And Les , I've watched you over the years express your creative way of you know there's a way that you can look at something and find the humor in it that you know we may not even like . You know , like we have this thing that we do where we laugh at something and then it goes deeper and then a whole other thing happens and like you're able to track this thing and then it's almost like you create a movie with , with the way that you're able to track this one about cheese , and we get to laugh deeper and deeper and deeper , and I watch you do that and that's very right brain , and so I watch you all . Use both and all of your big , beautiful brains to impress and to impact . Um , again , angela , for you . You should be free for work that demands untraditional thinking . So , or out of the box , social , energizing , enthusiastic and creative , um , and you feel passionately about things . One of my favorite things about you is how you . Or out of the box , social , energizing , enthusiastic and creative , and you feel passionately about things .
Speaker 1One of my favorite things about you is how you will close your eyes to find the words you want to say .
Speaker 3She does that I do , I do , I do , and you better wait because it's coming .
Speaker 1And she'll . She'll hold your arm down and it's like wait , like don't say anything , don't say .
Speaker 3Oh my , the holding down . And we've learned to go Wait , wait , wait , because something's coming to the well to dig it up . And there it comes , oh my . And she has even said on the podcast .
Speaker 1She said on the podcast like all right , I know I'm going on a tangent , but wait , wait , wait for me , I'm coming back , I'm coming back .
Speaker 3But do you see how , if we know this about each other , how we can support each other ? So for someone you know who doesn't understand that about you , angela , they may go . Ok , hurry up , lady , I don't have time , come on , come on , come on . They need to know , you know you need to wait for it because she's going to the well and she's going to pull up some gold . And for you , les , you know we , you know we , we know that you're a doctor and we know that you're a scientist and we know that you , you know you've got this whole left brain thing going . But if you give her just a little bit of space , it's going to be with compassion and joy . And you have . You occur to me as someone who has a constant state of positive expectancy , because we've all been through a lot . We've all been through a lot and you have space for all of us in the ways that you do .
Speaker 2You have space for all of us in the ways that you do . Kim . Let me tell you something funny that comes up . So Leslie and I have talked about in the podcast our Bible study that we would have Saturday mornings early Saturday mornings , right .
Speaker 1It became this constant thing that .
Speaker 2Leslie was always the one wide awake , bright eyed and bushy . 7 am already took the dog for a walk , had her third cup of coffee and we'd be just getting up . Could you turn down the sunshine ? Enough with the sunshine already , it's too much . It's too much , it's blinding . Turn it down , Leslie .
Speaker 1So yes , I'm like didn't we know that it was Bible study ? We've been doing this for 10 years . Why are you still under the covers ?
Speaker 3I just listened to that episode and you know , if it takes 12 years to get through the Bible , there's no rush . There's no rush , it's going to be there . It's going to be there . I love it .
Speaker 1I love it . Your father , reverend Dr Coles , would appreciate that . Oh , absolutely , absolutely .
Speaker 2So , kim , one of the things that I really what struck me about the description and the we tend to want to put people in boxes , and here goes my out of the box thinking it's just the way I'm wired . You just , you have proof of that now . Ok , kim , just told y'all is that you cannot be so rigid about people . They're only this way , or they're only that way , or this is the way they're going to react because they're that way and they're not this way . And having these really rigid , there are always intersections , there are always times that people are going to act differently . And you know , just , the idea of knowing those things that you know kind of come . You know is a consistent way that you operate . It doesn't , you know , is a consistent way that you operate . It doesn't mean that that's the only way that you operate . So can you talk to us about that a little bit ?
Speaker 3You know , as you were talking , what was coming up for me was the more of us that are willing to see each of us , as you know , multilayered and complex and to grant people grace .
Speaker 1I was just thinking grace the whole time you guys were talking , grace .
Speaker 3Grace , and because on top of this is culture and religion and background , and you know stories of things that have happened or haven't have happened , and we bring all of ourselves and , and this , I just feel that this work , um , allows me to go . Okay . So I am , by the way , I'm also a catalyst , oh , yeah and uh , you know that that you get to be willing to love all parts of yourself and be open to loving others , or at least be nonjudgmental of others , right , right .
Speaker 3To accept them and allow them to be as they are and to , in whatever ways that we can , create worlds where they can see that there's a . You know the , the , the sort of the flowering of themselves is a very good idea . You know this podcast they're going to be . You know other besties who listen to this and go we're just like that . Oh , we should . You know what we wanted to read the Bible . Let's do that together . You know they're going to be people . Um , exercising , like you all did , I dropped out of your exercise .
Speaker 2Yeah , kind of early on Kim got us into a group exercise on the catalyst .
Speaker 3I recommended , I highly recommended him , and then I had to go . We stuck with it for two years , kim , I'm so proud of you all , but you granted me grace and you let me go , and so I think it's just being willing to accept people as just as we want to be accepted as well , or just to be acknowledged , to be acknowledged Right accepted as well , or just to be acknowledged .
Speaker 1To be acknowledged .
