Ep149 She said yes at 63: A second proposal 40 yrs later

A FaceTime that wouldn’t connect, a birthday ice cream run, and a red box hidden under a saucer—then four words that change everything: will you marry me? We’re celebrating a surprise engagement that’s decades in the making and unpacking what it means to choose love, with clarity, later in life.

We retrace the moment—how he kept a three-month secret, returned the first ring, and enlisted his sister to find the one that felt right. From there, we go deeper: how our definition of love has shifted from a word to a practice, how small gestures keep closeness alive, and why time, at 63, sharpens decisions. We talk openly about the past marriage, the therapy that helps us own our part, and the language tweaks that prevent a casual “I don’t care” from stepping on someone else’s joy. The wedding conversation gets real: he wants one, she could elope, and we’re designing a plan that respects both preferences without defaulting to old scripts about gender or tradition.

Please follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review. Tell us: what tradition would you keep—or toss—for your next chapter?

Chapter Markers

• 0:00
  Welcome & Big News Tease
• 0:30
  The Proposal Reveal
• 4:30
  How He Planned the Ring
• 8:30
  Love Revisited After 40 Years
• 12:30
  Choosing Love as a Verb
• 17:30
  On Aging, Time, and Clarity
• 21:00
  Healing From Past Marriage
• 25:00
  Long Engagement, Logistics, Home Reno
• 29:00
  Gender Roles, Weddings, and Language
• 35:30
  Owning Feelings Without Dimming Joy

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Transcript

Welcome & Big News Tease

SPEAKER_01 0:02

Hey and hey Les.

SPEAKER_02 0:04

How's it going?

unknown 0:06

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 0:07

It's going really good.

SPEAKER_02 0:09

I'm happy for you. We have some big news. I have news. Yeah. I'd like to say we could listen. We. Yes, we two. We all in this together. We have some big news. All right, tell them where we are so we can have good news.

The Proposal Reveal

SPEAKER_01 0:29

Good news. So welcome to another episode of Black Boomer Besties from Brooklyn.

SPEAKER_02 0:36

I'm Angela, and that's Leslie, my best friend of almost 50 years. We are two free thinking 60-something-year-old black women who have decided to live with more joy and more boldness in our lives. And we invite you to join us on our journey, but even more importantly, to hop on or speed up, accelerate your journey as well. Yes. Today we're going to share some big news and we're going to talk about the feelings. All the feelings around the news.

SPEAKER_01 1:08

So we've been talking about a little bit about this.

SPEAKER_02 1:12

Can I tell them how I found out? Okay. So yesterday was my birthday. I turned 63 because Leslie is much older than me. She's we want to say happy birthday to you. And um my sister and my niece were visiting. Um and we decided to get ice cream after our dinner. This was on Sunday. So we're riding, I get a call from Les. I know she's in Florida, but we've already checked in. I know she's good. We got there okay. She's hanging out with the family. And she called a few times, and I thought she was butt calling me because every time I hung I answered, I would hear nothing. I didn't even notice that it was a FaceTime call. I just, okay. It's a butt time. Anyway, third time, I I answered something. I gotta tell you something. You gotta get on FaceTime. I said, I'm driving, I can't. Who else is in the car? My sister, my niece are in the car.

SPEAKER_01 2:27

No, you said, I'll I'll I'll FaceTime you when I get to the ice cream. When are you gonna have that ice cream? 10 minutes. We don't have 10 minutes. I said, who else is in the car?

SPEAKER_02 2:40

So um my sister's phone was dead. My niece, of course, she has Auntie Leslie's number. Um, and did she call you or did you call her? I forget.

SPEAKER_01 2:51

I called her, I think.

SPEAKER_02 2:53

Okay, okay. And then handed, like put the phone in front. My sister is holding the phone. We're we're three of us in the car now, and Leslie announces.

SPEAKER_01 3:04

I'm like, and he got on one knee, asked me to marry him, and I said yes.

SPEAKER_02 3:18

Can you make the make the fireworks go? It was it was make the fireworks go. Make it I should have pulled over. Because I got an immediate, like, you know, when you get a rush of excitement and the head, I gotta so, I gotta so, I gotta so.

SPEAKER_01 3:35

It's a little big, I gotta get it sized. Isn't she pretty?

SPEAKER_02 3:40

She is beautiful and what gorgeous hands.

How He Planned the Ring

SPEAKER_01 3:44

Wow. I had to put my move my aura ring. Oh, you weirdo. So and I had to get my nails done too. But I'm just so happy. I can't listen, I was so surprised. I thought you I thought he was I thought he was joking. Like, you know, because he used the opportunity to go down with me to my house in Florida. I went because my uncle and my cousins were gonna visit my mom. So it was gonna be like a a mini family reunion. And I said to Rick, I said, you know, I hope you're able to come. It was iffy because we're getting the house renovated and they're contractors and electricians and plumber and stuff every day. So it's been a little hard for him to get away. So when he was able to get away, I was like, oh, this is great. He'll get to meet my uncle and meet the rest of my cousins who he hasn't met yet, and all of that. Um I found out later that I found out so many things later.

SPEAKER_02 4:57

You know I didn't know, right? Because I I would have kept a secret, but I had no idea. I'm a little surprised he didn't tell you. I had no, I'm not surprised, to be honest, because people don't know.

SPEAKER_01 5:08

They don't know that they knew the secret yet.

SPEAKER_02 5:10

And maybe he didn't want me to have the pressure of it. You know, I'm gonna give him a lot of grace, but I did not know. So I did not know.

SPEAKER_01 5:19

Apparently, this man bought this ring three months ago.

SPEAKER_02 5:24

I love it.

SPEAKER_01 5:25

He's been sitting on this all this time. I could never hold the secret that long. I would just be hinting and like, there might be a box in your future. Maybe.

SPEAKER_02 5:38

Or instead, he was saying it may be a year or two years.

SPEAKER_01 5:42

Why don't you do your nails? You might, you might need to have your nails done. I would have done there's no way for three months. So he asked his sister to come with him while he went ring shopping. Wow. And she they went. Right. He actually picked out a ring, sat on it, held it for three weeks about. Right. And before the end of the return period, he's like, nah, I don't like it. And and returned it. And his sister said, nah, I didn't like that either. So they they picked this one out. Oh, it's beautiful. It looks so beautiful. It's a little big, it's loose, I gotta get it sized. But I love it. It's gorgeous. But moreover, I love a couple of things. I love the fact that he knew this was something that was important to me. I told him several months ago that I wanted him to marry me. I wanted to marry him. I wanted us to get married. But um the other thing, I don't know if I've mentioned it, I probably have not, not on the podcast, but he has reminded me frequently that he asked me to marry him 40 years ago. And I said no.

unknown 7:04

Oh wow.

SPEAKER_01 7:06

That's right. You know, but the thing, I'll tell you. Wow.

SPEAKER_02 7:10

Can we just sit on that a little bit? That is such a story. I can't wait to read your memoir.

Love Revisited After 40 Years

SPEAKER_01 7:19

And and and he has never married. Um yeah, I would not say he was waiting for me. I think what we both decided that when we were both available for each other, let's not let this get away. We really respected the love and the bond that we've had for this time. Now, I say this in a way that I hope people understand because I was married for um a number of years to someone else, and there was never any infidelity or any canoodling with Ricardo or anything. I respected him as Omari's dad, but we always um cared for each other, you know. I've always known he's cared for me. And I am the type of person that I can certainly care for someone in the proper place, and I don't have to be with everyone that I care for, of course. That's right. That's right. So we've enjoyed a good relationship these 45 years that we've known each other. And um, when my divorce was final, um, we spent more time together and realized that, you know, we let each other get away years ago. We're not making that mistake again.

SPEAKER_02 8:44

You let him get away.

SPEAKER_01 8:46

That's how that went down. Yeah, that's how I let her get away. But I recognize that it wouldn't have worked back then. Right. I wouldn't have been saying she was a different person. Exactly. And the people that we are right now, we're um we're it's just lovely. It's just so comfortable, and he's so caring and attentive, and I'm not I can go on and on, but I won't.

SPEAKER_02 9:16

And you're letting him. That's what I noticed, that you are letting him. And that's new for me. I we've talked about it here.

SPEAKER_01 9:24

That's new for me. We've talked about it, yes. I would have just as well, you know, planned or not had an engagement or not had a ring or no wedding or this or that, you know. I'm like, uh I'm not that fancy for the ritual of it all. Right, right. But um he once, when we discussed it, he said, you know, let I've never been married before. Let me do things my way. And let me be the man in this. And I said, Oh, oh, you know, I couldn't argue with that.

unknown 10:02

You know.

SPEAKER_01 10:03

Well, you could, but you chose not to.

SPEAKER_02 10:05

You controlled your natural instinct.

SPEAKER_01 10:10

You know, because he said, You've experienced this before. I haven't. So I want to do things the way that I dream it to be.

SPEAKER_00 10:17

Right, right.

SPEAKER_01 10:18

And um there was some ruse my mother pulled up about uh, hey, everybody, come here, sit close to the table. I need to tell you something. And I admit, I rolled my eyes, I'm like, oh, here we go. I didn't know here we go. She was about to give it away. She has no because she does not know how to do it, but you guys know that. Listen, the man was talking, and she started to say, like in the middle of talking, like, oh, wait till you see it. Wait till you see it. And my cousin had to say to him, Could you let him finish? Oh no. That's my mom.

unknown 10:57

Wow.

Choosing Love as a Verb

SPEAKER_01 10:59

I should have let him know. If ever you were to ask for my hand and propos, and she's there, don't tell her early. So anyway. Yeah. So he he, you know, she started talking and then he talking. Thank you for coming. I'm glad to meet everybody and all of this, he says. And um, and then he started telling about how long he's loved me, and we're glad that he's glad that we're together and this. And then, you know, he's tall and I'm sitting, and he says, you know, I'm a little tall. Let me get down here to your height. And then he says, wait, which knee should I get on? And he got on his right knee. He said, Wait, which knee? And he got on his right knee. And then he took, he had a uh right next to him, a saucer turned upside down over the red box. And I almost moved the saucer, you know, when I came to the table, because I'm like, why is this over here? We we're not eating anymore. Who would turn this upside down? He probably would have hit my hand. But anyway. So, um so and then he says, so I realized, and I gotta see the video because I was just stunned. I couldn't believe it. My I had my face covered. I was like, what? And and then he says, you know, will you marry me? And then you know me, I always wear a thousand rings. I had to take off all the rings from my finger, and he's like, put the ring on. I like, I gotta take these off first. And I said, Yes. Oh my goodness. And then the smith I'm still in shock. I can't get over it. Oh my goodness. Because he kind of said something like, Well, maybe next year, you know. And I was being patient, and I was like, okay, you know, next year when the house is finished and he's ready, and this, and I ca at first I thought he was a little afraid, yeah, you know, a little tentative, like, and then you know, you often wonder, is it me? You know, does he not want to marry me?

SPEAKER_00 13:23

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:24

Or you know what I mean? You start your head starts thinking of so many things. I knew I knew into our first year, I think, of being together, that um I did not want to let him get away again.

SPEAKER_02 13:41

You know, well, you survived Costa Rica.

SPEAKER_01 13:45

Oh my god, and Tortuguer.

SPEAKER_02 13:48

He got you through that, yeah. Well, that's beautiful, Les. I'm telling you, I I I woke up the next day feeling the excitement like in my body, even though I wasn't I'm like, something has shifted in the world.

SPEAKER_01 14:01

What is it? Yeah, I just for the first two days I just kept shaking my head. I can't believe it. And then even that night he said, as I was telling my fiance, I'm like, what? He's been practicing.

unknown 14:18

What?

SPEAKER_02 14:19

He said that. Oh my gosh. Have you said it yet?

SPEAKER_01 14:23

No. No. I s I think I've referred to him one more time as my partner. Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_02 14:29

You can sell both words. It's so much more than specific. It I know, I know. It's the yeah, it's it's it's like pregnant with anticipation when you say it like that. It's like because something's coming.

SPEAKER_01 14:44

Oh man. So I'm amazing. So so obviously now that it's getting more real, I have some thoughts and some musings. Okay. So great word. This will be my second marriage. And I was wondering like what or how my mindset has changed between the time that I'm preparing for uh life with this man versus I'm trying to think back of some of the thoughts that I had twenty plus years ago when I first married um my prior spouse. You know, and I wasn't young at the time, but I do notice a difference. One of the things is that my definition of love has changed a little bit. You know, it's almost I don't want it to sound um weird or anything, but I uh recognize now that love is more the verb than the noun adjective. Or, you know, it's is it nowny or verb? It's more it's m way more of a verb. Um because obviously what is the adjective?

SPEAKER_02 16:13

Tell me what is that well like Loving something about someone or versus loving them kind of thing?

SPEAKER_01 16:22

Um I don't know, you know, that that's a good question. I'll I'll get back to that. But what I mean is I'm using it as an adjective as a descriptor of feelings. Okay. So I'm used to hearing, oh I love you. Oh I love you, I love you. And it becomes almost rote, almost um compulsory before you leave the house, love you, you know. You know, and in the absence of the behaviors that are the l in the absence of loving behaviors, it really starts to ring hollow.

SPEAKER_02 17:12

Yes.

On Aging, Time, and Clarity

SPEAKER_01 17:13

Um likewise the peck on the cheek and the love you, okay, you know. Um I say I love you now and when I give even the peck on the cheek, it's different. It's different. Um one of the things, one of the ways in which I show my love in in addition to saying it, is I really try to show him how much I appreciate him and our being together. I feel lucky being with him. You know, I feel fortunate. And when we're together because we still live separately in uh different places um when we're together, I really make a um I make an effort to m um to show him that he's special to me. You know. Yeah. And and one of the things that I recognize is that, you know, in longer term relationships, sometimes you lose that, like where you'll sit next to each other and put your hand on, you know, not in a sexual way, but put your hand on the thigh or the leg or just touch your shoulder or y something like that. I um I want to keep that going as long as possible.

SPEAKER_00 18:51

Sure.

SPEAKER_01 18:52

You know. Sure, yeah. And and I think one of the things that's different about getting married again at my middle age at 63, and certainly for the second time, it's a recognition of the um of how short, relatively short a time compressed our time left is. So you we really want to it's almost like not wasted.

SPEAKER_00 19:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:26

Because some folks say, um, I've noticed this about your relationship as well, you know, it's like you feel almost like we probably would have taken it slower 15 years ago. Yeah.

unknown 19:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:42

But when you get to be our age and in our stage, when you know, you know. I agree. You know, you don't have to question yourself as often as you used to when you were young. Is it real? Is he real? You you're able to detect authenticity a little bit better and not get confused about lust versus the deep-seated love and a joy-filled relationship. And what's wonderful about it, and I feel blessed and lucky, is that I feel that. And I have someone who reciprocates those feelings. You know, I've I've mentioned before my prior spouse, he didn't like me. You know, which is is is sad for not just for me, but for for him too. He was in a marriage where with someone he didn't like, and I know he wished he did. He, you know, he didn't want to be with partnered with someone he disliked, but uh, you know, that's that's not we hope we hope not. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:50

We have a lot of questions about that.

Healing From Past Marriage

SPEAKER_01 20:52

Yeah, yeah, but you know, I've m thankfully I've moved on and been delivered from that. Yeah. But um Yeah, it's it's it's really something. So for him to have pulled off this three-month caper. The level of deceit with me, you know, needling him and all, and he didn't say a word. Meanwhile, if I had looked probably, it would have been somewhere I could have, you know, gone snooping. Thank God you didn't. No, yeah. Um, but that's not who I am, you know. To snoop, I don't do that. No. No. No.

SPEAKER_00 21:38

Okay.

unknown 21:39

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 21:40

I may I want to know stuff, I'll ask. You do want to know. But he wore his, he played his cards close to his vest. He didn't even, not even a hint. I'm like, what? I never could have pulled it. I never. I you know me. I am like Oh my gosh. I can't wait to get it. I could have held it for a few days.

SPEAKER_02 22:08

Don't tell me until a week, a week before the event. That's it. Yeah. Not anything before.

SPEAKER_01 22:14

And I said, you know, why if if if you were waiting, why did you buy it so early? Right. You know, and he said, well, he he bought it, but he had to get it sized.

SPEAKER_00 22:26

Right, right.

SPEAKER_01 22:26

But he also said that, you know, with this house rental, I was running out of money. He said he had to get it while he had the money for it. That's good. Good, that's good. That's good. Good choice. Good choice. Booyah.

SPEAKER_00 22:42

Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_01 22:44

So um Yeah, but you know, I'm a little nervous just about the prospect of remarrying. You know, I wanna I wanna do it right this time. What does that mean? You know, I I've spent some time thinking about my role in the um demise of my first marriage. I'll I'll use it like that. And I don't I gotta say just f just from what I know, yeah it all it's always about two people. Sure. So I can't completely blame the other person. So I'm really trying to accept my responsibility in it. And then I don't want to repeat mistakes of the past, which is why I'm um seeking therapy and trying to gain more insight about different behaviors and things like that, or what could have gone wrong, or other ways perhaps that we could have been more productive in handling our differences and things like that. I really want to go and stay in this relationship more open to um improvements and change and things like that, because I admit before, you know, there was so much dysfunction. It was so obviously my partner's issues and problems that he had. He had may w may way more problems with me than I had with him initially. You know, I just never thought that he was satisfied, you know.

SPEAKER_02 24:24

Right, right. Right. Wow. Oh my goodness. So do you is it gonna be a long engagement, you think?

SPEAKER_01 24:36

I do.

SPEAKER_02 24:37

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 24:38

Because Well Well, one, like right now our lives are really upside down with the renovation. You know, it's it's it's been disruptive to the household.

SPEAKER_00 24:50

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 24:51

Um so we want things to settle down.

SPEAKER_00 24:54

Okay.

Long Engagement, Logistics, Home Reno

SPEAKER_01 24:55

In that regard. And then um I wanna move in and get comfortable and all. So I really don't want to be here in this state and him in another state as a m while we're married, you know. So the other thing is that um I was telling him how many people were asking, so when are you gonna get married? When is the wedding? When is it? And he's like, I just got engaged.

SPEAKER_02 25:26

Like five minutes ago.

SPEAKER_01 25:28

Relax. So, you know, I don't think that there's a rush necessarily to um I think next year. Right. But I'm gonna sit back and allow him to be the man in this, you know, allow him to take the lead because he has more ideas and desires and what he would want than I do. Right. You know, when he said he wants a wedding and whatever, I'm like, uh, do I have to come? You know?

SPEAKER_02 25:54

So you know, I have to kind of so a few times you said the man and be the man and so on. Like, how do these um gender roles why what what when you say I him to be the man, like what what is what is what is that yeah, you know, versus the person who hasn't gotten married before, for example, right?

SPEAKER_01 26:20

And so certain things that he might be because one, we live culturally in a society of patriarchy. That's one thing.

SPEAKER_00 26:29

Right.

SPEAKER_01 26:30

And especially around marriages, engagements, and something, um, very often we split our behaviors into gender roles. Yeah. The man, man asks a woman to marry him, not the other way around. Right. You know, he got on the knee, I didn't, you know, I accept it. So what I've heard from him are more traditional tones and words about how he would want this to look, what what he would want this to look like. As for me, you know, I'm not um I don't even need a wedding, you know. It's it doesn't matter to me. I would be um more willing to go along with what he desires rather than my desire. So when he says, Let me plan this my way, I'm like good. And I look at that more as a male idea, you know, or a male role. I guess women are into wedding planning, but because he wants a wedding and I think he has a vision of what he might want it to be, I'm gonna let him do that because I don't actually.

SPEAKER_02 27:44

So that to me sounds like it's not a man thing, it's a individual thing. It's uh it's well, it's someone who wants to plan the wedding. And you don't think it conforms to traditional Well, just in this case, men you men um I would say um traditionally men have proposed, but it's non-traditional for a man to plan the wedding. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 28:12

So Unless the fiance does not want a wedding at all.

SPEAKER_02 28:21

Or could do without. Could do without. You're you shouldn't have too many toys. You really shouldn't have too many toys. Well, like, yeah, it's not that you don't you you you you're okay with him planning it. I am like it when you say you don't care or doesn't matter to me. Why not? Because it diminishes it to me. It's exciting. So you can say he really wants that and I'm all for it. You know, he can have what he what he likes, but to say I don't care, that's kind of well, I'll tell you I don't like it.

Gender Roles, Weddings, and Language

SPEAKER_01 28:58

If if I were to characterize it, it's more negative than positive. I I get that. It's more scary to me, it's more bothersome, intrusive, it's more work.

SPEAKER_02 29:11

Right. You know So imagine if somebody was saying that about something you were really excited about.

SPEAKER_01 29:16

Well, I don't say it to him, and he's not listening. He's not listening to this episode, are you, honey?

SPEAKER_02 29:24

Sorry. I didn't mean it, I just did it.

SPEAKER_01 29:29

I mean, I'm not trying to weigh in on his enthusiasm.

SPEAKER_02 29:34

I just want to step out the way because I used to get so mad at my kids when they would say things like that. Like, I don't care, or I'm bored, or those types of things.

SPEAKER_01 29:48

Well, how do you express it's not disdain. How would how is there a more effective way to express? What I what you think I'm feeling?

SPEAKER_02 30:02

Well, one thing, you're you're in therapy, so there may be some exploration about why this thing that this thing that you're doing that is a big deal and it's a big change for you, why you have all this negativity around it. That's one thing. And the other thing is for the other person, I know if I was excited about something and the other person was not, I I might feel some kind of way, right? And and even if you don't and so the the the the the the work to me is, you know, why am I doing something that I really don't care about? And that may become, well, it's not that I don't care about it, I would just rather not be the one to plan it. And so you might change the your language and the way that you feel about it, because it it you know what I mean? So it's it's just a place to explore versus this is what it is, and it's gonna stay this way. It's a it's a place to explore because it's a big deal. No, no, no.

SPEAKER_01 31:10

And you're saying I understand. I um I don't mind being a bystander in it. Okay, yeah. You know that's that's better. Just in five minutes.

SPEAKER_02 31:20

That's better. Because you were like, I don't care. I don't know. I'm I'm scared and yeah, you know. I mean, I'm not I'm saying these feelings are real.

SPEAKER_01 31:33

Um and I mean, you don't think that I should express them because they may not I'll say it a little differently.

SPEAKER_02 31:40

Yeah, say it a little bit differently. I'm saying that if you feel this way, you need to explore why you feel this way. Not that you need to be fake. I mean, why is it even worth exploring?

SPEAKER_01 31:50

I mean, there's something you first of all, yeah, you know that and I think I've told this to my therapist a long time ago, it's the same I wouldn't want a a large wedding for the same reason that I wouldn't want a large birthday party or any birthday party really or celebration. I don't like being the center of attention in that way. You know, so I I that I already know. Um You know, obviously because I love him, I'm willing to go along with it. I'm not gonna be miserable. I know I'll have a good time and all. I know that. I'm the life of a party. But um but you know, my first wedding, there were four of us at the wedding, and two of the people were me and my spouse. And it was it was an elopement. It was yeah. Yeah. So so yeah, it's just was I was never that young lady that said, oh, my wedding is gonna be this and it's gonna be dancing and people and this and that, you know, it was not your shtick. That's not my shtick. I'll I'll I'll host the hell out of a party for somebody else though.

SPEAKER_02 33:16

Yeah, put some of that, those sprinkles on it. Like, I'm gonna pretend it's his party and I'm gonna host the hell out of it. Yes. Anyway, I'm so excited for you. It's gonna be a lot of fun. Um, and I am uh it's it's your energy is came through the phone, it's coming through the screen. Um you deserve it.

SPEAKER_01 33:47

He is done. He really is. You just wait. I said to him like completely endorsed, you know, because I really haven't mentioned his name. I don't post any pictures of us or whatever. I said, you know, I'm gonna go public with this and I'm gonna start calling you out. He says, Okay. I'm like, okay, really? Because he's so private. That's why I thought he was kidding when he was in front of everybody and like, let me get down on one knee. I can't believe it the more I think about it. I gotta see the video. It's like, did this really happen? I'm like, what?

SPEAKER_02 34:21

That's so amazing. We were walking through the airport.

SPEAKER_01 34:25

He really was. We were walking through the airport. He's dapping and slapping and told us after, like, you know, the f we're hugging, and everybody's like, oh, I'm so happy for you. You should see. I'm just getting such a response and like, oh folks. My um, my um one of my close coworkers, she's like, I'm inviting myself to the wedding. Just tell me when. Cheryl said, um, I said, I said yes. She said, we said yes.

SPEAKER_02 35:04

That part. We had a different conversation the last time. We won't go into it now. You did ask us, and we did tell you.

Owning Feelings Without Dimming Joy

SPEAKER_01 35:14

Oh, yeah. What do you think? Well, you know, when you ask somebody a question, well, what do you think about and they they say they do the how should I say this? That's never a good start. They gotta figure out how they're gonna say.

SPEAKER_02 35:36

So anyway. Oh my goodness. Isn't that great? Isn't that great news?

SPEAKER_01 35:40

Yeah, I'm really happy. It's one of the so now it's like we gotta put that aside and finish this house. It's been, we didn't realize we have been dealing with this for a year. That's when we found the architect, October of last year.

SPEAKER_02 35:55

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 35:56

So we have to do that. They put the drywall up.

SPEAKER_02 36:02

Yeah, wow.

SPEAKER_01 36:03

But there's only drywall, you know. Right, right. And they still have uh upstairs to do and all of that. So my fiance thinks that it's gonna finish next week or the end of next week. My financer. My finance. Oh, that's so that's so cool. He's all his friends have seen the ring. Wow. I'm like, this man has been doing the tour. It's beautiful, leaving me out. Let him let him do his thing. Exactly. Let him do his thing. But this is such a great time. Thank you, Lord. Thank you, Lord. This is a wonderful time. It's a blessing.

SPEAKER_02 36:46

It really is. It really is. Anyway. All right.

SPEAKER_01 36:51

I'm good.

SPEAKER_02 36:52

I'm gonna be cheesing the whole rest of the night.

SPEAKER_01 36:55

I'm good. I'm exhausted. It's like with the travel, back to work, this and that. But it's a good exhausted.

SPEAKER_00 37:02

Good.

SPEAKER_01 37:02

And uh I talked to wait, I just gotta tell you, I talked to Mari this evening. And he said that uh he I've been telling my coworkers about it, and uh they said, congratulations. And he says that um it's funny because he's he said over the years he's never thought or pined like, oh, I wish my parents were married, or oh, I wish my parents were together, or this. He says he never wished for that. He always just wanted them to be happy. So he said that he he likes the fact that we're getting married, but that's not the big part. The biggest part of it is that each of us are happy and we hang out and do things together, and we're you know, we're sharing our lives together again, and he's not seen us together really like that um for many, many years.

SPEAKER_02 37:56

So right, right, right. That's awesome, isn't it? I love it. I love it.

SPEAKER_01 38:01

Full circle. I love it. All right, thank you for indulging me. I just had to gush. I had to gush. Gush away you deserve a full on gush. So this has been another episode of Black Boomer Besties from Brooklyn.

SPEAKER_00 38:23

Brooklyn