Ep170 How Everyday Judgment Steals Your Joy

In this episode, the Besties dig into the role judgement plays in impacting one’s joy. In typical fashion, they come to this inquiry by unpacking everyday events that they have differing views about. 

Do we make assumptions and judge others too quickly and harshly? If those we judge can’t hear what we say behind their backs, does it mean that our comments are harmless?

Angella and Leslie consider that the impact of this seemingly outward commentary may actually say something more.  That it may provide a window to their own inner psyche and  may stem from insecurity and self doubt.

If any of this content hits home, subscribe, share with a friend who enjoys looking at things sideways, and leave us a review with the one judgment you’re ready to drop.

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Transcript

Brooklyn Tech Memory And Banter

SPEAKER_00 0:02

Hey Ash. Hey Les. How's it going?

SPEAKER_01 0:05

You're silly as hell. I know I am.

SPEAKER_00 0:08

I have something to show you, but let's get started. Stop. Remember, okay, I can't help it. Remember, there was a time in high school. Somebody's gonna remember this. Listen, we went to the amazing Brooklyn Technical High School, right? BTHS Brooklyn Tech. Tech.

SPEAKER_01 0:26

All the way.

SPEAKER_00 0:27

We're all tech nights, right? And there was a period of time when it was it was mostly boys, but maybe some girls did it too. You'd be in a conversation with someone, and then they would just hold up a sign that said, no. Do you remember that? It was the worst.

SPEAKER_01 0:46

Because you were always with the cool kids. I never did this, never. And listen, Ange, I'm telling you, I'll tell you right now. No. If there's anybody listening to us that honestly remembers this, this lady is getting$100.

SPEAKER_00 1:03

$100, okay? All right. I want to do a shout out to our friend Linda. But you know about it. Our friend Mike. And listen, he would just hold it up and then it would just shut people down. You know, they're like telling, they're like telling their stories or whatever. And you know, man, wasn't that funny? That's pretty funny. That's pretty funny. It was awful. Anyway, that's what I want to say to you, Leslie.

Why Small J Judgment Matters

SPEAKER_01 1:31

Okay, stop. All right, go. Welcome to another episode of Black Boomer Besties from Brooklyn.

SPEAKER_00 1:38

Hey, folks, I'm Angela, and that's Leslie, my best friend of almost 50 years. We are two free-thinking, you best believe it, 60-something-year-old black women, and we are being really intentional of allowing joy to manifest and just do flip-flops and backstrokes in our lives. And we hope that you are on your journey too, or we hope that we inspire you, inspire you to start that journey. Um, we have conversations that um challenge um some old thinking, old assumptions about people our age or people approaching our age. We um we have conversations about joy and how we achieve those those things. And this one today is kind of both because we're gonna talk about judgment with the small J, right? Uh remember in Bible study we had a big J and a little J. So J little J judgment, the judgment that we have um around others and kind of our internal judge and how that can really destroy your joy. And I started talking to Leslie about this, and as soon as I got to a point where we were disagreeing on our approach to this, I was like, okay, let's stop. I don't know what you think. I don't know what whack way you're thinking about it.

SPEAKER_01 3:07

Sounds a little judgy.

SPEAKER_00 3:08

Whatever. So we're gonna get into it live and direct. We're gonna get into it. And um, so do you want to start with what what kind of got us to thinking about this?

SPEAKER_01 3:21

Yeah, I I'll start. So a few episodes ago, I mentioned that I was in a space in a hospital where I overheard a nurse doing an intake interview with a patient, and it was a mental health admission, I suppose. The nurse was typing responses into a computer, never looked at the patient, and it seemed so distant and impassionate and unempathetic that it was notable to me. So I was sitting some distance away, but I was able to hear the interaction, and I'm like, man, I can't that that maybe she doesn't need to be in this position, you know, speaking about the nurse, you know, why I I I I guess I'd admit that I was a little judgmental about that part, you know. Yeah, but um, and then Anch Miss Contrarian or Miss Well have you considered sorry, sorry, not sorry. We really got into this conversation. So, what did you say about that?

SPEAKER_00 4:35

What I said is you're just seeing one part, probably 10 minutes of that much of this person's life. You don't know what happened five minutes before she had this this conversation with the uh with the intake process, you don't know what she's going through, you don't know any of those things. You just saw this one slice, and it doesn't it doesn't mean that so what it doesn't mean she should not have gotten herself together and all of those things. I'm just saying if we could have some empathy for her, um because people are going through shit. They we all are, and we have different ways of coping or not coping with that, and so basically it was like you're just seeing this this slice in um this little piece of someone's life, and you don't know what happened kind of before this happened, and so that kind of turned into this bigger conversation around how we judge our you know ourselves and how we judge other people. And one point that I made that Leslie um she was like, I don't know about that. My point is that this type of judgment that we do, and let's kind of take it out of that particular thing that happened, but let's say if before we leave that uh that particular thing that happened, okay.

SPEAKER_01 6:06

Let's we both agree that that interaction could have been better for the patient. Of course, absolutely could have yielded a better experience for the patient. We do agree that we do what we are debating at this point is what could what the reasons behind the nurse's behavior.

SPEAKER_00 6:29

And I would even go a little deeper.

SPEAKER_01 6:31

I said, like, oh, maybe she shouldn't be in the position that she's a part. That part is where we might diverge.

SPEAKER_00 6:38

And also we got a few comments about the episode, and people were also kind of saying that's unfortunate, and you know, this profession is changing, and we used to be this, and now we're this, and that type of thing. And um, listen, the word that we use in Jamaica for this is cantankerous. Some people might say I'm cantankerous because I just evaluate things more deeply. And I wasn't always this way. I there were there are definitely um self-awareness and introspection that I've been doing over the last few decades that have brought me to being like this.

SPEAKER_01 7:21

And I'm gonna decades. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:24

I'm just saying, I'm just saying, you know, there was there was this one thing that I heard that never left me. I mean, it really had a profound impact on how I approached this type of thing, right? And it was um, this was pre-Franklin Covey. If you guys may know the um Stephen Covey, Dr. Stephen Covey, who did the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Well, before he merged with Franklin, which was a kind of um a daily planner type company to become Franklin Covey. I followed his work way before that. And there was a situation that he described that made me really give pause to the way that I immediately respond to something that I see.

SPEAKER_01 8:18

And the situation that is about a situation.

SPEAKER_00 8:21

Absolutely. It never leaves, it never left me. It it really never left me. Um, and he described this um people on a train, and this um group of uh kids came on and their father, and the kids were really just acting the fool. They were jumping up and down and and talking really loudly and just just really acting the fool. And the father was really complacent, he didn't say anything to them, he didn't correct them, and people on the train were getting really angry.

SPEAKER_01 8:55

Like, what in the world? What are you doing? Control your kids be a parent, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:00

Control your kids, yeah. Like, really get it, get it together, like really getting angry. And one person walked over to the father and said, Listen, you need to get these kids in order. They're being really disruptive. We're here trying to get to work, blah, blah, blah. And the father said, You know, um, you're right, and I'm really sorry, but we just came from the hospital and their mother just died. And I really am just not going to um, I I'm not, I don't know how to handle it. They don't know how to handle it, and they're just acting out. And I just, this is not the time where I'm gonna tell them that they need to sit down and with their hands in their lap and and and be good kids because their their world just got disrupted, right? And so that's the story. We know that that's the story. And so, you know, at any point, someone could have gotten on the train and observed this and had that response.

SPEAKER_01 10:00

And said in the world, yeah.

The Train Story That Reframes Empathy

SPEAKER_00 10:03

What in the world, right? Yeah, um, and that was one of the things that always kind of stayed with me and really started to shift the way that I kind of make initial judgments. It's one of the core things, honestly, that made me kind of um, and some people may say, well, that doesn't matter, they should behave anyway, sure. Um I'm not one I'm not one of those, I'm not one of those people. So for me, it's like, oh my God, I would actually feel bad if I had tried to tighten them up. Admonish them. Right, not knowing that this is what happened. And so that comes to mind here because it's like you you don't know what people are going through and whether they should have some reserve, some way of checking themselves and all of that for for your for you just to make you feel better? Like, how do like really? I mean, is that why? Is it who is it for? I I don't know how how do you how is this hitting you?

SPEAKER_01 11:10

It's hitting me a little differently because I keep thinking about the incident that incited this conversation. So I'm still putting it in the realm of a nurse. I'm a physician, you know? And we all know because I've been talking about it for months, that my home life is very, very hectic and difficult and emotional and all of this stuff with um my son's illness. I don't go to work acting inappropriately or unemotionally, perhaps with my with my patients or unempathetically. You know what I mean? So one thing about being a good medical provider or clinician is that we have we've been trained over the years and decades to separate our personal lives and our personal feelings from you know a lot of our patient care. And obviously there's some mixing. But what I was noting about that particular incident is that she, in my opinion, whatever it is that happened before an hour prior or a day prior or whenever, she was unable to shake that loose in order to be a good provider for her patient. Which is and yes, and you know, so in my world, it's almost like what preceded that it's not that important. And I guess what you're saying then is whatever preceded whatever may have preceded that your judgment of her is inappropriate. Is that what you're saying?

SPEAKER_00 12:57

Um, yeah, I think that's that's what I'm saying, and I think another thing that I'm saying is that this way that you say that you are trained as a doctor, and doctors are trained this way, and we're told to it shows up in patient care too, because y'all are some really um mean MF sometimes.

SPEAKER_01 13:18

No, I agree. I'm I'm not saying that she's that fell down on the job.

SPEAKER_00 13:24

No, I'm saying that training about being separate and checking your emotions and so on also shows up in how um it doesn't just show up in well, you didn't have control, and so you brought your feelings into the situation as the nurse did. It also shows up as you are in control, but you're too much in control. Do you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 13:54

Wait a minute now. Hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold on, hold up, wait, wait. First of all, there's no such thing as being too much in control. But I I kind of understand. Say more, say more about that.

SPEAKER_00 14:13

Well, I'm just saying that um the the first thing is uh the the patient um needs a certain optimally the per the patient gets a certain level of care. Um the nurse is a person too. And your response to, well, we're trained to, as medical professionals, behave in a certain way and kind of check our lives at the door and not bring it in. I get that. I'm saying that even that training can result in there being a um uh a breach in kind of the humanness, the humanistic interaction. It's an overcorrection, yes, that's a great way to say it. It it often looks like that, and then it's like, but but then you have an excuse.

When Professional Distance Turns Cold

SPEAKER_01 15:05

Well, this is how we're trained, but no, no, you're you're right, I can see that. So let's bring it back to judgment, though. Okay, yeah. So I kind of think that I I would say to you and others. I feel like I should have a I'm not a judgmental person. I'm not a judgment. I let people be people and stuff, and you know what? Okay, guys, close your eyes. The lightning, the lightning is about to strike the lightning is about to strike. I'm very judgmental, and and but I'm I'm judgmental in inconsequential ways. They don't really matter. Oh my god, I can't believe I'm admitting this. I'm judgmental in ways like why is she wearing? Like, okay, I'm so glad you brought that up. I'm like, how I feel about leggings. I didn't want ambulance. I'm still on that. And Crocs. So I'm gonna write a book called Leggings, Bonnets, and Crocs. What the what? It's like it just yeah, is it judgmental to say that it looks like you just don't give a shit? And as a result, I mean, and you know, you might you might say maybe you just waited. And why do they need to give a shit?

SPEAKER_00 16:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 16:41

But well, where else am I judgmental? I mean, and that's harmless judgmental. I don't go there and rip the bonnet off the head, you know. Like, sis, come on, please. Don't do me like that.

SPEAKER_00 16:53

You just you just talk about it on your podcast. You don't go in. No, but but seriously, here here it here is one.

SPEAKER_01 17:01

See, I could be having a bonnet on. I have a nice little cashmere beanie on right now. I'm not wearing a bonnet, a sleep bonnet in public. And that's your choice. But I wouldn't blame you if you judge me if I In fact, let me go get my bonnet. Let's see what you say. You're gonna cut the tape. You you guys are gonna see some heavy editing.

SPEAKER_00 17:23

No, go ahead. Here is where I think that, you know, we're making fun here, but here is where I think these types of little or big kind of judgment-y things that we do and that we get used to, how I have seen it um sap your joy, right? Because oftentimes when you see something and you make a statement, oh, she's too big to wear that, or um, I would never let, I would never let my kid behave that way, or um, you know, oh, that lipstick, she's she's too dark or too light or too whatever for that lipstick, right? She's too old, too young. All of those things, right? They're actually an indictment of yourself. Because then when you want to wear that lipstick, it's like, yeah, but I know how I respond to people who would make that choice. I don't want to do that because I don't want people to think that of me. And those kind of compounded, it really becomes things that become barriers for you.

SPEAKER_01 18:37

In other words, it restricts you from being your authentic self.

SPEAKER_00 18:43

Yeah, or whatever. Let's not even use where the word authentic at this point, because let's say you're just trying to figure yourself out, right?

SPEAKER_01 18:50

Okay.

Leggings Bonnets Crocs And Quiet Judgment

SPEAKER_00 18:50

I'm saying that the cumulative effect of you having these ideas and kind of fermenting these ideas and being wrong and strong about having these ideas about how you see other people, they actually point back at you and become the thing that makes you think twice about trying something. I don't want to make that mistake because I don't want people to talk about me. I'm not saying you actually think that. I'm saying that that is actually something that's happening that you're not even aware of. And it just kind of closes you in, right? Because you're you're the things that you might want to try, eh, I don't want to try that because I I don't know how to do it 100%, and I don't want to make a mess and I'll be embarrassed. What why would you be embarrassed? Because someone else doing that, that might be the way that you respond to them, and you don't want to be the the the object of ridicule. But in a life where you're trying to pursue joy and abundance and newness and expanding your your the boundaries of your comfort, you you have to do that. So these ways of being, these these, you know what I mean, they really get in your way without you even noticing it. That's that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01 20:09

Um partially understanding you, it's almost like right here. It's like it's almost over my head, but it's it's right here. It's at the eyeglass level, right?

SPEAKER_00 20:19

Well, let's say, let's say something like um uh my when I used to have my wig line and I would have um women, beautiful women, come into my studio and they would try on a wig that you could just see when they put it on, they just lit up, right? You could just see it's like, ooh, you know, they start to maybe it was a a color that's a little different than because I didn't have like red and purple and those colors, you know, just a color that really brightened them up and so on. And I would see people like go from that to, yeah, but I couldn't wear that to work, or yeah, but my husband or a spouse wouldn't really like that, or I can't allow myself to feel this way all the time.

SPEAKER_01 21:04

This good all the time.

SPEAKER_00 21:05

This good all the time. And I think it's because it's like if they saw someone show up at work with the hair that may have been a different color, I don't want people to think, you know, to wonder if that's my hair. So it starts to limit you in expressing these things or inviting more joy and satisfaction and fulfillment into your life because you don't you don't want to be the person who is then looked on and know that people are saying these things about you.

SPEAKER_01 21:39

No, I can see that. But but I think even more than that, for me, I try and I really do, I try not to be so judgmental. Because the older I get, what I realize is that people should be free to be who they are and do and wear what they Want to and what makes them feel beautiful. And what very often it's like it's not my taste, it's not something that I would wear, but I'm growing into appreciating that people allow themselves that freedom. I know a couple that I'm thinking of right now, elderly women who still say, Oh, people will what they would think I'm crazy, or they would think that I would do this, or they would think, or they would say, What would they say? You know? Um and in that instance, it's easy for me to say, why do you care what other people think? You know, at what age will you stop caring and allow yourself the freedom to express yourself any way you want to?

SPEAKER_00 22:54

Right.

SPEAKER_01 22:55

Right. You know, and that's something I would love for myself. I'm not that too con I'm not too concerned about things that people say about me and things like that. I'm pretty over that. But um there's still room for more freedom. I mean you know, kind of just shedding all of that. So I I understand what you're saying.

SPEAKER_00 23:17

Yeah. And that's kind of you you you brought it together nicely because what I'm what I'm saying is it's not just don't don't judge other people. Right? That's one part. I'm saying that your choosing to do that over and over again is limiting you. It's having an effect on you. It's not just don't treat other people this way, because some people might say, oh, but they didn't hear me say that. So it doesn't matter because I didn't say it out loud or they didn't see me staring or whatever. But what I'm saying is those thoughts you need to check because they are impacting you. When you put on that nice skirt and you know you look good, and you know your legs look good, even though they're bigger than you may want them to be, and you know you look good, you're not gonna wear it because you just you've been talking about somebody else who made that choice. And so you won't do it. Because talking about a skirt is a thing. It's a thing, it's a thing, it's a thing. You do it on the regular. I'm saying that it it does impact you from you. It does, it does, um, it does impact you, is is what I'm saying. And it interferes in this journey of joy that we're always talking about here. I think that it does interfere with with that, right? I I I I can't I can't do that because um, you know, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:55

So can you summarize what's the lesson in this?

SPEAKER_00 25:00

Stop talking about no, no, the lesson the lesson is.

The Five Whys And Root Causes

SPEAKER_01 25:04

No, and the reason I ask it in that way, Ange, is that as I'm getting older and and I really am becoming more and more introspective. I mean, that's something that I want, I'm trying hard to do. So, how is it that I can look at this and and consider this for myself in terms of being judgmental and the way that I think? Because even if I don't verbalize these things, obviously there are thoughts in my mind.

SPEAKER_00 25:33

Okay, so the first thing that came to mind is um a couple weeks ago, we talked about an episode um um on YouTube that Stephanie Perry um from Exodus Summit did, where um just a small few minutes, she mentioned her response to Reverend Al Sharpton when she saw him um sitting in a beauty salon getting his hair curled. And at the time she had her hair permed, now she's natural, and she had a visceral reaction, negative reaction to seeing him doing this. Why would he judgment? Why, how dare he? It was very like angry at what she saw him doing. But instead of kind of staying there, what she did is she said, Why do I feel this way? Why am I having this? So the answer is you go inward. Why am I feeling this way? That why do I think this about that person? What is going on inside of me that makes me even give it a second thought? I ain't got I don't have my own stuff. Why am I even putting any attention to this? And I'm not saying that to to kind of drape yourself up at, you know, like stop doing. It's to be inquisitive about why you're thinking what you're thinking. The why isn't just to stop there. The why is to get an answer and then say, oh, you know, maybe, maybe this isn't something, or maybe like she did, what she realized is she was resentful about the fact that she had been at that time going every six weeks and getting her, you know, creamy crack and getting her hair permed. And she she, you know, and she was she was um she realized that she was through with that. And she started to kind of evaluate, and maybe I'm adding to some of this because I'm in the hair space and I can imagine um that she decided, no, I don't want to keep doing this. And well, that's what she said, yeah. Yeah, right. And since then, she's she loves her natural hair, but it did it came from her not kind of sitting in, yeah, that's just wondering why she was reacting in that way.

SPEAKER_01 27:59

She looks like someone else in what they were doing.

SPEAKER_00 28:02

Yeah, exactly. Why am I allowed to be like?

SPEAKER_01 28:04

I guess my question is what is it about me? Okay. What that I feel when these folks are wearing these crocs and head bonnets or leggings or right, and you don't have to make it this grand um thesis, Les.

SPEAKER_00 28:21

Tomorrow, because it will happen. Tomorrow.

SPEAKER_01 28:30

Oh my goodness, you're putting me out there like that. When you have one of these thoughts, and you ain't gonna believe what I saw. You wouldn't believe what she was wearing. Let me just tell you. I snapped a picture of it. Let me show you. No, I've never done that.

SPEAKER_00 28:49

But no, but you you you might just in that moment, just in that moment, you might say, Why does but why does that really bother me though?

SPEAKER_01 29:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:01

And and get an answer. Don't again, don't just ask yourself a question without getting an answer.

SPEAKER_01 29:05

It really does bother me. It really does bother me.

SPEAKER_00 29:09

It does. And and again, inquiry is me a lot. It doesn't bother you. No. It it used to bother me. Not at all. It doesn't bother me. It doesn't bother me. It's not my choice. I I wouldn't choose that for myself. And that's maybe another part of this. It's like if you don't want to do that, if you don't like how that looks, then don't do it. But you don't have to spend all your time.

SPEAKER_01 29:35

And I still don't like the way it looks. It it's it's an affront to my eyes. Okay. Well, you know what, Leslie?

unknown 29:45

Look.

SPEAKER_00 29:48

I can't help you.

SPEAKER_01 29:50

All right. I can't help you. We couldn't think more about this judgmentalness.

Respectability Politics And Self Freedom

SPEAKER_00 29:56

So, Les, remember when we talked about this? This was like probably in our second or third season when we talked about the the bonnet thing. Remember when I I put you through the five whys? You started to understand. It's like um it's like Oh, that was good. Yeah, the five Ys. Reminder or the listeners about the five Ys. We'll we'll put our link to it. Well, it basically it's it's um it comes out of um this manufacturing, I think, Japanese manufacturing process. I don't know if you guys know Six Sig Six Sigma or kind of how do you get better, better and better and better. So one of the tools that are used for that is is called the five whys. And the theory is that when you answer each question with a why, um, and then you apply a why to the answer before it. I'll give you an example in a moment. When you get to the fifth level, that's that's usually the root cause of the thing, right? So um why why don't I like brown? Well, I don't like brown because blah, blah, blah. Well, why do you I don't like brown because it's just so dull? Well, why do you think brown is dull? Or what do you not like about why do you think brown is dull? And then, well, I think brown is dull because it looks like dirt. Well, why do you think dirt is bad? So, so not a great example, but you get the idea. Every answer to the first um to the question before you turn it back on itself and you ask the why about that level. And so the idea is that when you um pass through the fifth one, that's usually at the crux of the matter. And and so and so that was the crux. I took so I took Leslie through that process around why she feels this way about people with bonnets. And it was really fascinating, right? Because she had some um ideas around, well, it's because they don't care, and I want people to care about themselves. Well, why do you why do you why is it so important to you to care about well, because it's it's it's a methodology. So I I remember it because I, you know, I use it all the time. But anyway, um that's uh a a tool.

SPEAKER_01 32:21

Um you just brought up a good point, and I'm not gonna um we're not gonna go too much further into this, but okay, if my dislike, if my judgment, I'll use that word, of people wearing bonnets turns out to be because I would want them to care more about themselves. Yeah, that's laudable.

SPEAKER_00 32:46

Okay, if you stop there, I want because that's where I want to stop.

SPEAKER_01 32:52

Because that's where I choose to stop. No, no, no, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_00 32:56

I'm being altruistic and bracing my fellow people. I want everyone to love thy stuff. Not on my watch. Now, that sounds really like rec respectability politics to me. Really, really, really. And I know that that's not not something that you dig. Why do we associate these things to lazy or to not caring about what they look like or not wanting to be seen as in a positive light versus a negative light? I think there's some connection there that you're making that if you don't look or dress, or if you make these choices, then that means that you are not interested in elevating yourself. And it could just be because they like the freaking bonnet.

SPEAKER_01 33:48

Or it could be that they have their hair in rollers and they're preparing to go out. We could go on and on. It could be that that uh bonnets at home. I beg you, please. I beg you. I beg you, please. Put some pants on. Take the pipes off in public.

SPEAKER_00 34:11

Take the yoga pants off.

SPEAKER_01 34:13

Yeah, I don't like to see those things under your arm. Please leave those pants at home. I know they're comfortable.

Letting In More Joy And Closing

SPEAKER_00 34:21

And listen, guys, this isn't about doing these things in in any level of perfection, right? We're not we're not trying to get to that state where you never feel judgy or you never, never, never. It's not this. Just get a little better at it because really it's like this inverse, inverse um correlation, right? The the more you get better at it, the more you let joy in. Because the more you are better at not um judging others in this way, the less you judge yourself in that way. And so it's kind of this, right? And so you there there's there's some benefit that you get from it, just getting better, not trying to be a hundred percent um in in this thing. It's just kind of check in. And then, you know, last thing I'll say the more that you are curious about why you do things, why you respond to things, why do things bother you in this way, the more that you learn yourself. And you might say, I don't like this part of I don't like that I'm like this. That's this is how my this is how my mother was, this is how my grandmother was, this is how my uncle was. I don't want to be like that.

SPEAKER_01 35:35

Ding ding ding. That is is yeah. Yeah, that resonates with me a lot.

SPEAKER_00 35:44

Okay, okay, there you go. All right, you're welcome.

SPEAKER_01 35:50

All right, no hundred dollars for you though.

SPEAKER_00 35:55

You don't know, you don't know. We'll we're gonna give it how long we're gonna give it a a month and see if anyone says something.

SPEAKER_01 36:03

I don't mind. We can give it a year. Ain't nobody coming up with that.

SPEAKER_00 36:07

I'm just saying. I'm gonna say, wait, I'm gonna send someone to say, remember. Yeah, we're gonna be able to do that. I'll don't remember you remember. Wait, I'll give you$50 if you say exactly$50 for you,$50 for me.

SPEAKER_01 36:21

You wouldn't do me like that, though. I would not, I would not, no, I wouldn't anyway. Anyway, you see, this is how we are. Thank you for listening, folks. This has been another episode of Black Boomer Besties from Brooklyn.

SPEAKER_00 36:36

Brooklyn