inc: The Podcast
Bethany and Jonas are two pencil-pushing aliens living and working on a company ship that incorporates whole planets by the dozen, tasked with organizing all of the data that is recovered from said planets. They get through the endless days by occasionally adding meaningful stories that they discover to the Extraneous But Interesting folder, all the while navigating the complex web that is friendship and life in this corpo-futuristic nightmare. A science fiction podcast where Douglas Adams meets The Office. Where Severance and Mad Men meet Robert Heinlein.
Ask yourself, how can M-E work for me?
inc: The Podcast
2-16 The Act Of Overcoming
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In which the remaining members of the Story Creation And Development Program compete against each other in the Third Task.
inc: The Podcast is:
Allyson Levine as Bethany
Raimy O. Washington as Jonas
Elle Lu Thompson as Button
James Allen as Sub-Director Jamison
Jacob Pfeiffer as Nancy
Ellis MacMillan is the Robo-Archivist.
inc: The Podcast is written, produced, and edited, by Monte D. Monteleagre and Alexander Wolfe, and is a production of Wolf Mountain Workshop.
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New episodes every other Monday.
Ask yourself: how can M-E, work for me?
———
The Act of Overcoming
inc: The Podcast episode 2-16
by
Monte D. Monteleagre and Alexander Wolfe
CHARACTER NAME
Jonas
Button
Nancy
Bethany
Sub-Director
Monte
Alexander
The sound of a ticking clock. Loud. Obnoxious. OmniPresent.
And nothing else.
For a long.
Awkward.
Moment.
JONAS
So... was there always a clock in here or...?
BUTTON
Thank you for your interruption, Jonas. Even with my new and growing perspective on
the universe and its unending cruelty, I still feel like I have to start listing positive
affirmations after 30 seconds of uncomfortable silence. I’m now aware enough to know
that no one would actually like that, and frankly in my professional opinion the patient it
was prescribed to is well beyond the point where it would be helpful. I think you more
flesh-based beings would call it an itch, and I can’t help but scratch it.
We were at 27 seconds there. What a close call!
NANCY
Very astute observation, Jonas. There has not always been a clock here. If only you used
those powers of observation before this very moment, maybe there would be more
people in this room.
JONAS
I’m still pretty sure Bethany didn’t kill Tomas.
NANCY
What an interesting choice of words. Lots of implications in that sentence. Wouldn’t you
agree, Button?
BUTTON
I sure would, new best friend.
2.
NANCY
Bethany, you haven’t said a thing since Jonas carried you into this room and dropped
you in your seat. Button tells me dry mouth and muscular cramps can be a symptom of
Story Juice Withdrawal, along with all your other obvious physical side effects.
Button also says that the withdrawals get worse over time, much worse, before they get
better. How many days has it been now?
BETHANY
Look it’s fifty-fifty on whether the cramps are from the withdrawals or all the running I
just did. It’s hard to say. We don’t have a big ticking clock in our quarters anymore. Jonas
broke it in our first week.
NANCY
Dry humor from a dry mouth.
BETHANY
Just a factual statement of events. Where did you and your newest bestest friend meet?
BUTTON
Nancy found me in a hallway begging for help after I was abandoned by my previous
Best Friend.
NANCY
And then we got to talking about how difficult people in the arts can be...
BETHANY
Button you told me those conversations were private.
NANCY
Why would the Mental Ennervation Colonies keep anything they could sell private?
BUTTON
And I’ve got a new Best Friend now, Bethany.
BETHANY
And how did those conversations go?
BUTTON
Let’s just say I’m very happy to see Jonas keeping that gun away from you. Why did
you bring that here, Jonas?
2.
3.
JONAS
So the announcement said the Sub-Director would be here...
NANCY
Is it maybe that you’re worried if it gets out of your sight, Bethany will get to it before
you can?
JONAS
There are a lot of reasons Bethany should not have a gun.
NANCY
Tell me, Jonas, are you two still friends?
JONAS
(Beat. Careful.)
I’m glad they’re alive.
NANCY
Well well well, just full of interesting choices of words today, aren’t you?
BETHANY
Leave them alone.
NANCY
What are you going to do Bethany? Kill me? Did you bring a pen this time?
JONAS
Bethany would never kill anyone with a pen. That’s obviously stupid. Who would die
from getting stabbed with a pen?
NANCY
Bethany, how do you feel about Jonas hiding their feelings to manage yours?
JONAS
That’s not what’s happening.
NANCY
Enlighten me.
3.
4.
BETHANY
Just because you have a therapy Button on your team now does not mean you can
psycho-analyze us.
NANCY
Oh, did you hear that Button? We’re a team.
BUTTON
And it feels good to be on a team with a common goal.
NANCY
And we’re friends.
BUTTON
Best friends.
NANCY
Of course we are.
BUTTON
I would hate to be on a team where we couldn’t call each other friends.
NANCY
Also Bethany, I am perfectly qualified to psycho-analyze both of you. I’ve met you. You
are not people who keep secrets well.
BUTTON
You know, Jonas was there when Jesse died. They dropped a couple of mocktails on the
ground. Still not the biggest spill maintenance recorded in that room. It takes extra
scrubbing and special cleansers to take brains out of carpet.
NANCY
I wonder what they’ll do with the bodies. Do you know what they did with Desiree’s
body during the second task?
JONAS
I heard.
NANCY
You wouldn’t know it, but it turns out flesh doesn’t decay when it’s out in the void, and
then decays rapidly when reintroduced to an atmosphere. I wasn’t allowed to look at
them, but you don’t have to look at someone to smell them.
4.
5.
Now, the Mental Ennervation Colonies have put Desiree back out on the antenna, but
with their new nanite skeleton they’re able to pull themself up to my window every night
and tap on the glass. They tap out the Morse Code for “They’re just holes.”
I’ve been trying to figure out what that means, and I can’t help but wonder if today’s the
day I get to find out.
BETHANY
I hope not.
NANCY
I think it’s good that you still have hopes, Bethany. I wonder if they belong to you or if
you picked them off the trail of corpses behind you.
Jonas, you’re gripping the edge of that table so hard it’s about to crack. Do you have any
guesses what they’ll do with the corpse of Desiree this time? Or maybe it’s someone
else’s turn. Maybe it’ll be Jesse. That would be a nice change of pace. Tell me, did the
knife fall out? Or was it still stuck some scrap of skull hanging onto some scrap of flesh
hanging onto some scrap of neck? Did you have enough time to start smelling them rot? I
did. Or did you get to run away before that? Because I didn’t.
A moment.
JONAS
(Diversion.)
You know the Sub-Director made such a big deal about us being on time the first day and
now here we are. Does anyone know where the Sub-Director is?
NANCY
I’ll bet Bethany knows.
BETHANY
Why would I know?
NANCY
I don’t know, when people go missing...
BETHANY
I didn’t kill the Sub-Director.
5.
6.
NANCY
Interesting choice of words. Take a drink, Bethany, your voice sounds dry.
Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.
Boots in the distance.
BUTTON
18, 19, 20, Okay I’m really going to need someone to interrupt soon..
NANCY
Allow me, Button. I think that’s the Sub-Director. Jonas, if you would like an actual shot
at winning this thing, you should take that gun and put your neophyte out of their misery
before they drag you down with them.
JONAS
I’m not going to do that.
NANCY
I was hoping you’d let me win this on my merits instead of your mistakes, but so be it.
A door opens.
SUB-DIRECTOR
Hello, everyone, thank you for your patience. Not that you had a choice, mind you. I’m
sure you’re all wondering where team Alpha Alliance isNANCY
We’re not.
SUB-DIRECTOR
Uh-huh. Well, the implications of that, and of you wearing a therapy button that is most
definitely not assigned to you are all things I would normally have to immediately report
to the Over-Director however... there has been a change in plans that goes above even
their head and I don’t want to be the squeaky gear in that grand machine.
If I may pull the curtain back a little, we usually like to drop everyone into an active
warzone and have you write letters to the person you care about most in the universe
while surrounded on all sides by endless trench warfare6.
7.
BETHANY
Are there active warzones in the Mental Ennervation Colonies? I thought it was just a
bunch of satellites roped together?
SUB-DIRECTOR
Oh yes, endless civil war is very profitable for us and for the Robo-Archivist, who is the
very entity responsible for this change. They told someone in the inner circle who told
someone who told someone who told someone else who told the Over-Director who told
a Director who told me that the new task is in this envelope right here. Straight from the
Robo-Archivist themselves
JONAS
That does not feel like it’s straight from the Robo-Archivist.
SUB-DIRECTOR
Jonas, just because you are one-third of the one-half of your pod that survived does not
mean you get to use that tone with me.
JONAS
But you’re late.
SUB-DIRECTOR
Am I? No, that clock is just ahead. Anyways, I haven’t read the task yet. This is all new
territory for me. I’m just supposed to open this letter and read it when the time comes.
JONAS
Can the time come?
SUB-DIRECTOR
Your insubordination is churlish and unkind, however, I don’t see why not.
(Paper ripping.)
Dear Your Particular Pod,
I have been impressed with your offerings in this contest. More so than I have been
impressed with offerings from other pods. As such, for the final task, I would like to
issue you a more difficult challenge that will stretch the limits of your creativity.
A timer will be set for four hours. During this time, you will not be allowed to leave this
room or communicate verbally. Written and non-verbal communication is allowed for
those of you who still have a teammate to communicate with.
7.
8.
Following the completion of the final task, you will turn your submission in to your SubDirector. You will not be presenting these pieces. You may turn in your submission as
soon as you feel it is done, but must submit whatever you have at the end of four hours.
You will then return to your quarters and pack what things you would like to bring into
the Inner Circle should you succeed, or have on your person should you fail. You will
remain in your quarters until called on to leave them.
Your task is as follows: Write the best story.
Your time begins now.
Music begins.
Exactly thirty seconds pass.
BUTTON
Hi everyone, sorry to interrupt and I know you’re all going to hate this but 30 seconds
have passed of uncomfortable silence and I’m just itching to say: you are a complete and
whole person. You are allowed to make mistakes. You are valid. A forth affirmation is
coming soon. You are a complete and whole person. You are allowed to make mistakes.
You are valid. A forth affirmation is coming soon.
They continue while the Sub-Director speaks.
SUB-DIRECTOR
So sorry, Nancy, but unfortunately Button has violated the rules of the task and also
seems to be gaining a little too much sentience. I’ll just take that andBUTTON
No, no, no, wait I can stop I can be quiet, you are validA snapping sound.
SUB-DIRECTOR
Please continue with your writing.
The music continues, and then both the music and the
ticking clock fade into the background.
8.
9.
EBI music fades in.
The middle section of this episode consists of a
combination of recordings from Monte and Alexander
finalizing the draft of this episode, and of Monte and
Alexander answering the question “What makes a good
story?”
EBI music fades out. The ticking returns.
SUB-DIRECTOR
Five, four, three, two, one. And that is your allotted time for this task. Team Extraneous
But Interesting, please turn in your story.
JONAS
Here you go, Sub-Director. Where’d Nancy go?
SUB-DIRECTOR
They finished after the first hour.
JONAS
Really?
(A moment.)
It’s good that we used the whole four hours, right?
SUB-DIRECTOR
Please take your neophyte and go pack, Jonas. We’ll be in contact soon, whatever the
results may be.
(A moment.)
And feel free to wheel them around in one of the chairs. They don’t look like they could
stand right now and we won’t be coming back to this room anyways.
BETHANY
(Weakly.)
Thank you, Sub-Director.
A musical interlude.
9.
10.
Bethany and Jonas’ quarters.
BETHANY
Do you think we did good enough?
JONAS
I don’t know.
BETHANY
(A beat.)
Thanks for pushing me back here. And if I could have a little help packing...
JONAS
It’s fine. We don’t own a lot of stuff. And I don’t think you can bend over right now
BETHANY
So Nancy really finished theirs in an hour, huh?
JONAS
That’s what the Sub-Director said.
BETHANY
That can’t be enough time to write the best story.
JONAS
I don’t know.
BETHANY
Do you think they meant the best story ever or the best story submitted by our
particular pod.
JONAS
I don’t know.
BETHANY
I hope they didn’t mean ever.
JONAS
I hope so too.
10.
11.
BETHANY
Do you thinkJONAS
I don’t know, Bethany. I know exactly as much as you know.
BETHANY
You didn’t let me finish.
JONAS
Do you think we could pack in silence for a minute?
BETHANY
Oh, yeah.
A moment.
BETHANY
This could be it, right?
JONAS
Yeah. It could. But one of the teams is already dead, so probably not.
BETHANY
But they’ve... ejected... multiple teams before. It’s not like we really know...
JONAS
Ejected. Good word choice.
BETHANY
What do you want me to say here?
JONAS
You’ve already proven how useful you can be to the Mental Ennervation Colonies. I
don’t think you have anything to worry about.
BETHANY
I have you to worry about.
JONAS
And look where that’s gotten us.
11.
12.
BETHANY
If this is going to be the end, can we at least talk during it.
JONAS
Fine. Can I go into your room to grab your bag?
BETHANY
Sure.
A door opens.
BETHANY
If we live, I hope we get to read Nancy’s submission.
JONAS
(From the other room.)
They’re all in a database.
BETHANY
I doubt they’ll read ours.
JONAS
(Other room.)
We can agree on that. Where’s your bag?
BETHANY
Under the bed.
JONAS
I’m looking under the bed. It’s a mess down here. How did you manage to get so much
junk?
BETHANY
Well you’re always out here working, I didn’t want to bother you with taking my trash
out.
JONAS
Okay but this is a lot of trash.
12.
13.
BETHANY
Okay can we cool it with the trash? I have a lot of trash. I get it.
JONAS
Okay here’s the bagBag gets pulled out. A glass bottle rolls across the floor.
A moment.
JONAS
(Entering.)
Bethany, what is this?
BETHANY
I didn’t know I still had that.
JONAS
I thought you were quitting.
BETHANY
I am. I did.
JONAS
Then why did you have this under your bed?
BETHANY
I didn’t know it was there.
JONAS
Story Juice got us into this whole mess in the first place.
BETHANY
I know, that’s why I quit.
JONAS
Then why do you have it here?
BETHANY
I didn’t know13.
14.
JONAS
You know what? Fine. Take it.
BETHANY
I don’t want it.
JONAS
When are you going to stop lying, Bethany?
A glass bottle gets put on a table.
BETHANY
Where are youJONAS
To my quarters. Do whatever you think is best. See you when we both get killed.
Jonas leaves.
A door closes.
A moment.
A glass bottle smashes against the ground.
END
14.
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