The River Morning Show Weekly Podcast | EP 140 | SEP 27 2025

Josh, Hannah, and Producer Mike explore everyday dilemmas through lighthearted conversations about social awkwardness, bad habits, and the small things that make us human. 

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Transcript

Podcast Introduction and Toy Hall of Fame

SPEAKER_08 0:00

Here's what to expect on this week's episode of the River Morning Show Weekly Podcast.

Breaking Bad Habits

SPEAKER_04 0:04

Would you rather randomly yell or would you rather break out in a dance? I think I'm gonna choose yelling and I will ask God to be merciful that it's not during some solemn prayer that everyone's coming, they're bowing their heads, they're going to the Lord for something serious, and I'm like, Thanks for clicking play on this podcast. You can find more of them when you click on demand at riverradio.com. And there's a special guest here today. This is the River Morning Show Weekly Podcast. And here for you, producer of the morning show and the podcast, producer Mike. Hey. So thanks for downloading this. It's all his hard work. What's the hardest thing about putting this together, Mike? Probably finding that clip right at the beginning to say, like, oh, this is what's coming out of the podcast. The T's. Yeah, exactly. There's so many great options to choose from. That's the right answer, dude. Well, tis the season for the nominees for the National Toy Hall of Fame. You are a toy! So uh producer Mike is here with the list of this year's nominees. Let's go. I'm excited to see how you react to this. Okay. Because probably I'm old enough now that a lot of these I would have played with as a child. Gotta keep scrolling on that age range on all the websites now. Alright, we're starting off with Battleship. You sunk my battleship! I think that's a win. Absolutely. That's a classic. I like it. Uh next up we've got Katan or Katan or however you want to pronounce it. Yeah, that's fine. You learn how to barter with that game. Connect four? Yes, of course. Yes, that's it. Classic. Uh Cornhole. Yeah. Alright, so these I'm thinking four for four. All of those belong. Just wait until you hear this one. What? Furbies. Listen, you need to understand that those are from the pit of despair. Those things are so scary. There was one time, like, someone gave us one and it was talking by itself in the basement in the middle of the night. And I'm like, what why why have we let the devil himself into our house? And plus, those eyes are so big. Let me click on this what this link that you Yeah, see, I'm talking. No way. You need to bury that in a coffin six feet under. Move on. No, no Furbies. Next up we've got this one I'm surprised isn't in there already. A scooter? Just like a regular scooter? Just a scooter. Well, yeah. Of course, yeah. I don't know how that wasn't already there, but here we are. Uh next up we've got slime. I mean, I suppose, but most moms will not want slime to be in the National Toy Hall of Fame because it leaves grease stains on the ceiling. And you throw it around. My mom was not a big fan of that. Uh next up is snow. Snow? Snow. Like snow. Like winter. As in. Like snow? Like those little like stuffed snowballs. Okay. But I no. It's snow. What I remember this list from a couple of years ago. They tried to put a stick in the National Hall of Fame. It's a stick. It's a broken tree branch. That's not a toy for the National Toy Hall of Fame. Next thing you know, it's gonna be like water. Because we can play in water. Let's put a cup of water in the National Hall of Fame. No, get off my lawn. Get your snow off my lawn. No, I don't like that one. Next. This one I didn't know what it was coming in. So maybe you know because you know, child in a different time. Yeah, that's a nice way to say it. What? It's a spirograph. Is that one of those things it looks like a gear and you put a pen in a hole and then you like go around in a circle? Yeah. And then it makes like these patterns and stuff. Yeah, that's what it looks like. If you here's here's my thing for the National Toy Hall of Fame. These are the nominees for it. If you can't easily explain it or know what it is in one word or the name of it, no. I'm right there with you. Okay, so next. Star Wars lightsaber. Of course! Yes, absolutely. You could start and end right there. Yes. That absolutely has to go in. It's amazing. Yeah. I had a ton of these when I was a kid. Do it. Alright, next up we've got the tickle me Elmo. Okay. Alright, listen. It was bad enough when we had the Furbies. But now we've got They say it takes 21 days to start a new habit. But I want to know how you broke a bad one. I thought of this because I read a statistic. Smokers will have to try to quit 30 times before it sticks. I don't know how accurate that is, but it sounds very daunting, and I get it. There's a lot of addiction when it comes to that. And it can be a serious addiction thing, or it could just be a habit. What was it that you were able to quit? What was your key to quitting? Call or text the show. You can encourage somebody else to keep going. 800-609-1049. My habit, which was just gross, I used to bite my fingernails relentlessly. Oof. Like I was always going after it. Chomp, chomp. Yeah, the reason I stopped was uh I'm I'm a big Cleveland sports fan, and so I watched LeBron James when he was with the Cavs. And when he was younger, and I think he still does it, he'd be biting his fingers, his fingernails in the middle of the game. In the middle, like on the bench when he was out, and I was like, that looks disgusting as I'm chewing my own. I'm like, wait, ironic seconds. So I decided to stop then, and uh more recently I have and we talked about this uh here on the show. I have nail clippers with me at all times. In case I get a hangnail or whatever, something's bothering me on my nails, I don't bite it, I trim it off to keep my fingers out of my mouth. Wow. So that's how are you, Josh? That's how I was able to stop being nasty. What was your key to quitting? Call or text to share 800-609-1049. Producer Mike is here, and I saw this statistic, Mike, and I was really surprised. It said it's gonna take a smoker 30 attempts before they're able to quit. Yeah, that's crazy. That's a lot. And it got me to thinking, and not necessarily about that habit in particular, but habits in general. What was your key to quitting it? Whatever it is or was, I hope. 800-609-1049. You can call or text. Chelsea texted the morning show and said, I sucked my thumb until I was 10. And she said she quit by using a rubber band on that wrist. And anytime she went to put the thumb in her mouth, she'd snap the rubber band like a slap on the wrist.

SPEAKER_03 7:12

Oh, jeez.

SPEAKER_04 7:13

Chelsea. She said it helped me quite quickly. I believe it. Yeah. Oh my goodness. Mike, if you had one, because I I talked about biting my fingernails, and so that's done, thankfully. Uh, how about you? Uh, I would say that when I was younger, I had a bad problem of leaving lights on, especially in my house. That is every child ever. Yeah. So you fixed this. I want to hear how you fix this. I fixed this by moving out and having to pay for my own electric bill. Oh, and your parents are like, see? We told you. Yep. Bills are great motivators to stop bad habits. Incredible. What was your key to quitting Marilyn and what was it that you uh were able to get rid of?

SPEAKER_05 7:59

Um, I constantly had bronchitis or walking pneumonia, and then when I came down with pneumonia, the doctor said, Listen, I've treated you three times in the past three months, and you're just not gonna quit smoking, so I'm just not gonna give you anything else.

SPEAKER_04 8:15

Oh my goodness. So it was smoking for you.

SPEAKER_05 8:18

Yep, you're gonna choose the cigarettes over being healthy. So I walked out of his office crying, went straight to the emergency room as I'm on the way to the emergency room. I threw the cigarettes out the window and I'm smoked and wow.

SPEAKER_04 8:31

So did you get any other assistance with that, or did you just cold turkey, white, wash your hands of it, and you're like, whatever comes, I'm not going back.

SPEAKER_05 9:11

That's exactly. I threw him out the window. I went to the emergency room, they gave me um the breathing treatment and they gave me some medicine, and I never smoked after that. I was scared. I cried all the way, I couldn't breathe.

SPEAKER_07 9:23

Yeah.

Getting Lost in Stores

SPEAKER_05 9:23

I kept thinking, I'm gonna die before I get to the ER. I mean, it it people say it he shouldn't have done that, and it was really, you know, cold-hearted and heartless, but actually that's the cold-hearted and heartlessness is what made me quit.

SPEAKER_04 9:39

Yeah, it's a different version of tough love that sometimes you're not quite looking for, but it does the job.

SPEAKER_05 9:44

Absolutely. So, and that was in 2002.

SPEAKER_04 9:48

Wow, Marilyn, thank you for sharing. Congratulations on 23 years free from that. We appreciate you and we wish you many more. Right now, though, I want you to uh imagine imagine a world where you're at the store, you can't find anything you're looking for. What do you do? And we know if this happens at a Trader Joe's near you where producer Mike is wandering around, he's going to help you. Absolutely. That's what I'm there for. You did this the other day? I did, yeah. I helped a guy who looked like he was really struggling if he wanted to get a pack of the orange chicken that was there. Interesting. And I just encouraged him to. Congratulations, thank you for being nice. Uh, let's move on to this. Imagine that producer Mike is not at your Trader Joe's. Uh what do you do when you are completely befuddled? And if you're thinking, well, that answer is simple, then I want you to call or text and share 800-609-1049. Because I propose it is not nearly as simple as you think it is. It's not as simple as just asking somebody. Because there are people who work in these grocery stores in certain departments. They're not gonna know. Most of the employees that I see are people just stocking the shelves. They're not gonna know. They're just what's in this box? I'm putting what's in this box on that shelf, and that's all that they're going to be able to do. So, what I do is I keep looking. I'm looking for this to go up and down the aisles. I'm circling the section up and down again. Get your steps in over there. I do, and if that doesn't work, I look it up on Google. Where will I find this item in most typical stores? So, what section? And that has helped me a couple of times so that I can figure out it was I was in the wrong section, so I gotta go to the correct section. If that doesn't work, I call my wife because she's probably the one who sent me out there to the wolves to try to figure this out. And then if there are no other options, I will look for an employee who seems to not be busy because I don't want to bother anybody. And I will tell them it's like, I know I'm probably standing right next to it, but can you please tell me where fill in the blank is? And they're always very happy and helpful, but I'm always very terrified for the human interaction of me not knowing something and then having to ask for help. That becomes the last case scenario then. It's not it's not a pride thing. I don't mind asking for directions all day long, but it's an awkward thing. I know I'm weird and I don't want to put that on anybody else. What do you do if you can't find it in the store? Call or text 800-609-1049. If you are at the store and you can't find what you're looking for, what do you do? Last resort for me, talk to someone. I'm trying everything else before that. Social interaction can be frightening. Well, especially when I'm the vulnerable one going, hi, I'm a dummy, and I can't see this thing that probably is on sale and has its own display. I can't find it. What do you do? Call or text 800-609-1049. Bruce said, I send my wife to go find help while I continue to look for it. Little bit of divide and conquer over here. Send her for help. You weren't. That's that's funny. That's funny to me. It's not like you're in a car accident in the Alps or something. It's like, go go get help. Uh thank you for calling, Kelly. What do you do?

SPEAKER_06 13:10

Well, I normally shop at Kroger, and their app has an in-store mode where it will tell you which aisle and shelf the item is on.

SPEAKER_04 13:18

Kroger is the one I go to. It's like two minutes from my house. It's an in the app, it tells you, it gives you directions?

Would You Rather Yell or Dance?

SPEAKER_06 13:25

Yes. You have to switch it to in-store mode. But yeah, you just enter your item and it tells you where to go.

SPEAKER_04 13:32

I'm going, when I get home today, I'm going to ask my wife to send me to the store, and I am trying this. I'm going to say, give me the most random thing you think we'll need in the next month. I will go find it with in-store mode in the app. Thank you, Kelly. All right. You're welcome.

SPEAKER_06 13:48

Good luck.

SPEAKER_04 13:49

Thanks. Bye.

SPEAKER_06 13:50

Bye.

SPEAKER_04 13:52

Producer Mike is here, and he is a pot stirter. And I don't appreciate it, man. I love it. I know you do. It's so much fun. Smile on your face right now. So we're playing Would You Rather? Hannah's not here. So Brittany is on the phone to take Hannah's place, and we'll try to figure this thing out. Brittany, you ready to play Would You Rather? Yes. All right. So here's the question for today. Would you rather randomly yell once a day, like at the top of your lungs, or would you rather break out in a dance randomly once a day? Oh my word, Brittany. How are we going to choose?

SPEAKER_05 14:27

That's I think I would rather break out and dance.

SPEAKER_04 14:30

Really? Man, I don't know. Like, I I'd like being behind the scenes, and this puts me in front of every scene.

SPEAKER_06 14:39

What would I be yelling? Like, I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 14:42

I want to know. Like, so that's a good question. So Britney has asked what she would be yelling. I want to know how long I will be dancing. Like, these are the two important things we need to know, producer Mike. So when you yell, it wouldn't be any specific words. It really wouldn't be anything intelligible. Just a just a yell. Yeah, just a sound. Um, and then for the dance, it could really be anything, but it wouldn't be anything longer than 30 seconds. It could be it could be anywhere from two seconds to 30 seconds, and it's different every day.

SPEAKER_05 15:14

No. Yeah, I'd rather just bust the move.

Struggle Meals and Sleep Secrets

SPEAKER_04 15:19

If I knew the Forrest Frank dance, maybe I would choose. I I think I'm gonna choose yelling, and I will ask God to be merciful that it's not during some solemn prayer that everyone's coming, they're bowing their heads, they're going to the Lord for something serious, and I'm like, That'd be really fun to hear on the air. It would not. Well, you just did, actually. So there's that. And we all know this lunch is everybody's favorite subject in school. Absolutely. When you become an adult, though, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. Hashtag bills, y'all. For real. I've learned that the hard way the past couple years. And because of that, you described your lunch how the other day? A struggle meal. A struggle meal. Explain struggle meal because this is genius. So I pretty much had no food in my house. I have been putting off going to the grocery store for a long time. And so I just had to make do with what I had and what I was able to put together. I found some ramen that had been in my cabinet for about two months. Okay. I bought it at the beginning of August. Yep. Uh, my last string cheese. Uh, that was the last one in the bag in my fridge. This is it, and a tiny little pack of peanut MMs. Unbelievable. You are the hero we all need. Describing this as a struggle meal because we have all done this. We are sifting through the pantry going, what am I gonna make? Just last night, my wife called me with this exact problem. She's like, we have 15 minutes where everyone's gonna be home. What do we do for dinner? So we didn't we didn't cobble something together. We went to subway. But anyway, so that's not what we're talking about. Your struggle meal. What is it? Call or text 800-609-1049. I've done this, I'll share mine, want you to share yours too. 800-609-1049. Producer Mike has introduced a brand new concept that we all have done, and I love it. It's called the struggle meal. Explain yourself. Sometimes the struggle is real, and you've gotta find something. Like you don't have food, or you're just like, I don't feel like making food, and you just throw something together and it gets the job done. In our house, we've done this. We call it usually Fend for Yourself. Eat what you can find, that sort of thing. But the combinations are epic. Uh, folks are texting, you can text or call with yours 800-609-1049. Sonia texted in and said, ramen with tuna fish. Oh, gross. Oh, ugh. Oh, Sonia, no, no, don't do it. Okay, okay, move on next. We heard from Brandon in Lancaster who said a ketchup sandwich, just bread and ketchup. Yeah. I could see, like, I wouldn't want to do that, but I would. If I try it. Yeah, sure. Yeah. It's all I had. And then another friend said, Pinto beans and plain macaroni with yellow mustard. Who hurt you as a child? I don't like that. Say it again. Pinto beans and plain macaroni with yellow mustard. That is a struggle meal for real. I feel like it's just like a random wheel got spun and landed on things. It's the Wheel of Wonder Wonder Blunder lunch edition from earlier in the show. I have I have done this recently. I generally have a can of soup each day because it's portion control, it's calorie controlled. I like it. It's easy to heat up, whatever. But I don't want chicken noodle because my wife will make that a lot, so I'm not gonna get Campbell's chicken noodle. However, one day it's all we had. And I didn't have time to like go out for lunch on a given day, so I grabbed the can of chicken noodle soup and a cucumber. And that's like a whole cucumber. And it was big. It was as big as my forearm. It was huge. It looked like an eggplant. Like it was massive. And so I was at the end of that meal, I was very full and very disappointed. I was unsatisfied all at once.

SPEAKER_01 19:27

News that'll make you go.

SPEAKER_08 19:29

Wait, wait, wait. What? Josh, what in this wild, wacky world did you find today?

SPEAKER_04 19:33

I couldn't believe this. I don't know if you'll believe it either. I was I was shook. A new study says the average person falls asleep in seven minutes. No, fake news. Absolutely not means there are people falling asleep faster than that. Because it takes me a good 30 minutes every night.

SPEAKER_08 19:52

Oh yeah. I'm like, I can be 45 minutes to an hour.

SPEAKER_04 19:55

Yeah, yeah. I was that way as a kid. Sleepovers were terrifying. If I went to some some other person's house and like every one of my friends that I recalled, yeah, immediately they're like head hits the pillow.

SPEAKER_08 20:07

Well, that actually supports the average thought, then, and you're an outlier. I I just don't think the average human falls asleep in seven minutes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 20:17

All right, so both Hannah and I are calling shenanigans on that statistic. However, I do know people do fall asleep relatively quickly at times. If you're one of those people, how do you do this? What's your secret? I am missing out on like 30 minutes of sleep a night, and I need it. Hannah needs it. Let's go. All right, share your secret on getting to sleep quickly. Call or text 800-609-1049. And the uh the truth serum will be if you're talking to us and we fall asleep, we'll know you're telling the truth.

SPEAKER_01 20:52

News that'll make you go.

SPEAKER_07 20:53

Wait, wait, wait. What?

SPEAKER_04 20:55

Recent study says the average person falls asleep in seven minutes.

SPEAKER_07 20:59

Ah, that's which seems crazy.

SPEAKER_04 21:01

Sounds ridiculous. Hannah, you're a 45-minute person.

SPEAKER_08 21:04

Yeah, like it's just like this long, drawn-out process, for sure.

SPEAKER_04 21:07

I'm a 30-minute at least. When I was younger, it was like an hour. My wife was the same way. Our kids are the same way, so we struggle. Ben, how long does it take you to fall asleep? About like three to four minutes.

SPEAKER_03 21:20

How do you do that? What? So the secret, I don't drink coffee at all. Like ever?

SPEAKER_04 21:28

Well, this is a sacrifice I'm unwilling to make.

SPEAKER_00 21:32

That's fair.

unknown 21:33

That's fair.

SPEAKER_08 21:34

So you think that's what plays into it? Like you just have no caffeine going all day?

SPEAKER_00 21:39

Pretty much. Because I wake up. I don't usually need it. I'm usually up ready to go.

SPEAKER_08 21:43

Have you heard I think that this is a myth, but that a single apple has the same amount of caffeine or benefits of a cup of coffee? What?

SPEAKER_04 21:52

I've heard that. Another food item comes to mind when you say that, Hannah, bologna. No way.

SPEAKER_08 21:58

I don't know. I've heard that if you eat an apple, that it gives you just as much energy as a cup of coffee. I don't know if the math is mathing, though. I don't eat apples. Oh, okay. Well then that's helping you fall asleep too. Bingo!

Signs You're Getting Old

SPEAKER_04 22:13

I want to know what was not on your bingo card. Call or text 800-609-1049. For example, and producer Mike is here with me. I didn't have this on my bingo card, and you watched it happen in my office multiple times. I had to glue my plant to the wall. I have, I don't even know what kind of plant it is. I should download an app and look it up, whatever. It's got these long vines. It's really pretty, but it's huge. It's massive. It takes up like that entire corner of your office. So, a couple of days ago, I tamed this thing by getting some connectors that stick to the wall that will hold it up. It goes over the window and it goes around a picture and they intertwine with each other. It looks really, really nice. But it's so big, it started pulling those sticky tabs off the wall. But you and I are sitting there talking, and we just hear this rustling like there's a bear in the woods. And no, that's my plant falling off the wall. So I got more sticky and I got super glue. And I glued my plant to the wall. I did not have that on my bingo card. What wasn't on your bingo card this week? 800-609-1049.

SPEAKER_00 23:28

How old are you?

SPEAKER_04 23:30

I'm not telling. So, Mike, this is how I knew I was getting old. Uh oh. First, though, uh, if you have a story about when you knew you were getting old, please call and commiserate with us. 800-609-1049. You can also text that number and share your story. 800-609-1049. For me, I knew I was getting old when I got judgy. Oh? And I don't and I don't mean like judgy like an old person doesn't have a filter anymore. I still have tact. Here's what I mean. I knew I was getting old when I saw a picture of somebody who was a year behind me in high school. And I thought, wow, they look old. And then I remembered I'm older than they are. And I don't oh, I don't want to be here anymore. How did you know you were getting old? Call or text. 800-609-1049.

SPEAKER_00 24:27

How old are you?

SPEAKER_04 24:28

I'm not telling. How did you know you were getting old? You can call or text 800-609-1049. Ryan go. How'd you know you were getting old?

SPEAKER_02 24:38

I'm 31 years old, and when my neighbor does the grass, I gotta do the grass the next day. And then I also get mad when people walk on the grass after I get done cutting the grass.

SPEAKER_04 24:49

Well, are you very precise on your lines and patterns?

SPEAKER_02 24:53

Yes. One week I'll go uh north or south. Yeah, next week I'll go east and west.

Expiration Dates and Closing Thoughts

SPEAKER_04 24:58

Now I haven't mowed my lawn in years because I have teenage sons, but when I was mowing it, I would go in a rotation north-south, then diagonal, then east-west, then the other diagonal. So in a month, I did all of those like that.

SPEAKER_02 25:12

Yeah, that that's how I knew I was getting old, is when I didn't want people on my lawn and uh lawn pressure.

SPEAKER_04 25:20

Ryan, thanks. I don't think you're old, I just think you're precise, and that's just fine.

SPEAKER_02 25:25

Well, thank you, Josh.

SPEAKER_04 25:27

I can't believe what I just saw. Yeah, yeah. You, actually, yes. Hannah just ate with a smile on her face a bag of slimy old carrots. Ew! They were how far past due? Past two. Past date were they?

SPEAKER_08 25:46

Probably like a week. That's nasty. But they still have a lot of vitamin A. My eyesight is great.

SPEAKER_04 25:51

I don't know.

SPEAKER_08 25:52

Your eyesight is slimy now.

SPEAKER_04 25:54

I mean, I know that rabbits will eat old carrots, but rabbits are super destructible.

SPEAKER_08 25:57

It was a ranch, so you can't really tell that they're slimy.

SPEAKER_04 26:00

Yeah, see, you can't just cover that up. You can't the expiration date is there for a reason.

SPEAKER_08 26:05

It's a suggestion.

SPEAKER_04 26:06

It's not a rule. It's people like you that make other companies have to put the warnings on things.

SPEAKER_08 26:13

It's all made up.

SPEAKER_04 26:14

If these carrots become liquid, do not consume.

SPEAKER_08 26:18

They weren't liquid, they just had a little bit of slimy slime on the stuff.

SPEAKER_04 26:22

What else do you eat after the expiration?

SPEAKER_08 26:24

Well, you just always, it's not, it's just about the sniff test, you know? The the sniff test and the chunky test. Oh gosh.

SPEAKER_04 26:32

That's so bad. At the house at in my family, I am the sniff tester because since pregnancy, my wife and I have we have four kids. Her sniffer doesn't work. What? Like she she can smell, but it doesn't work well. Like, she'll literally open the milk jug and hand it to me. She'll be like, I can't tell. Like, well, first of all, honey, there's a film on top. Second of all, the expiration date was June. Third of all, ew. But she can't tell. Or I'll have to say no, it's fine. Go ahead and get the American cheese.

SPEAKER_08 27:00

Women carrying everything on their back. No, no, no. Hold on.

SPEAKER_04 27:03

Hold on one second right there.

SPEAKER_08 27:06

Things we make happen.

SPEAKER_04 27:08

Without me, my wife would consume accidental cottage cheese. Ew. Okay. Ew. See, even right there, you're not going past the expiration date.

SPEAKER_03 27:18

Hey, you're invited to listen to the recording of this podcast live. How? Where? It's simple. You can share every weekday morning with Josh and Hannah on 1049 The River in Columbus, Ohio, or online at riveradio.com.

SPEAKER_04 27:32

It was a journey, but we've made it together. Thanks for listening to this episode of the River Morning Show weekly podcast.

SPEAKER_08 27:39

And hey, since you made it this far, would you be willing to like and rate this podcast? There's a few stars you can click. Five stars would be wonderful. A few at least, five at most.

SPEAKER_04 27:49

We'd love the big one.

SPEAKER_08 27:50

And even more than that, if you want to subscribe to make sure you never miss an episode, please do. We love hanging out with you.