199. Middle-Class Mentality & Breaking Free w/ Guest: Shane Perry

This episode highlights the importance of breaking free from your comfort zone to achieve personal goals. Shane Perry shares insights on the psychology behind goal setting, the impact of a middle-class mentality, and the value of embracing the disruption factor for personal growth.

• Discussion on the mindset cafe's mission 
• Shane Perry's journey and experience in personal development 
• Explanation of the comfort zone and its limitations 
• The disruption factor and its role in achieving goals 
• The significance of writing down specific goals 
• Strategies for cultivating a new, empowering comfort zone 
• Legacy message: Don't settle for mediocrity

https://www.disruption-factor.com/

Chapters

• 0:00 Unlocking High Performance Mindset
• 5:08 Breaking Out of Comfort Zone Mindset
• 14:56 Navigating Social Expectations and Comfort Zones
• 19:13 Embracing Entrepreneurial Mindset and Setting Goals
• 27:58 Building New Comfort and Goal Setting
• 35:38 Avoiding Settling and Embracing Adventure
• 40:39 Sharing Motivation and Gratitude

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Yeah, it's mindset cafe. We all about that mindset. Gotta stay focused. Now go settle for the last. It's all in your head how you think you manifest. So get ready to rise, cause we bout to be the best. Gotta switch it up. Gotta break the old habits. Get your mind right. Turn your dreams into habits. No negative vibes, only positive thoughts, thoughts. What is up, guys? Welcome to another episode of the mindset cafe podcast. It's your boy, Devin, and today we are honored to have a special guest. He's a speaker, he's an author and he's, honestly, he's an expert in really helping people achieve their goals. And you already know, with the Mindset Cafe we are all about achieving our goals and bettering ourselves. You know at least 1% every single day. So I'm honored to welcome Shane Perry to the show. He spent the last 35 years really studying the human behavior and what holds people back from really achieving their goals. So, without further ado, Shane, thank you so much for coming on.

Speaker 2: 1:12

All right, thanks, devin, happy to be here.

Speaker 1: 1:14

So let's dive in. I mean, how did you get into the space of personal development? How did you like? What was your story leading up to essentially coaching?

Speaker 2: 1:29

Well, I'm going to make. This could be a long story. I'm not going to do that to you. I'm going to be real quick.

Speaker 2: 1:31

For the last 36 years, I have a business that's really revolved around really motivating team building, helping people. It was a business that was 1099 contractors and my job was really to get out there and find people and introduce them to the opportunity that I represented and represented and train them and help them and build them. And very early on I just couldn't understand why so many people would want to change an area of their life. In this area it was business and financial and when presented with an opportunity, even excited about it, they won't get out of their own way and do what's necessary. And I would just sit there and think to myself like I don't understand. You don't like your life, you're not happy, you've got a chance to do something about it. What are you waiting for? So what I did about gosh about 25 years ago is I did a real deep dive into the, just trying to understand the psychology of people. I you know college psychology textbooks to everything. I can get my hands on every book and I have, and I had, a knack for people anyways, for understanding it and I really kind of figured some things out and I started changing the dynamics of all of my one-on-ones and my big training meetings and everything I did with my business to, instead of just product or sales or team building or training. Probably half of all of it was really trying to get in their heads and get them to change the way that they think and get out of their own way. And I succeeded. I didn't realize back then, but I put together a real system and I built an incredible business and seven figures. I've been kind of semi-retired from that for 12 years. It kind of runs itself. So I've been enjoying life.

Speaker 2: 2:59

And about 10 years ago I kind of looked back at all the stuff that I did as far as mindset and mentoring people and I kind of packaged it a little bit and I started branching out because I had some friends that were in real estate and other sales businesses and wanted me to help their people. And a lot of it went into fitness too, and I'll talk about that later. And then three years ago I lost my 19-year-old daughter. She passed away when that happened. Obviously that's a defining moment. It was a real paradigm shift for me. One of the things I realized is how much I do love helping people, how much I love working with people and how much I like being a part of helping people grow.

Speaker 2: 3:40

I decided to take this and turn it into a business and create a disruption factor. You know I've got my online course out there. I do seminars, a lot of speaking engagements, just starting some one-on-ones with people, but it's really focused on helping people become high-performance individuals, which, in my terms, what I represent means that you have the ability to set a goal and do what's necessary to achieve that goal right. 92% of people who set goals in the world don't achieve them.

Speaker 2: 4:09

Number one goal is typically fitness, weight loss and just really focusing on helping people achieve their goals, with a real intense focus on the dis. On the comfort zone that's really my specialty and you know when you everyone's heard of the comfort zone. You can go online. You can see all the circles and all the memes and everything and all the sayings, but it's rare that you find anyone that can actually teach on. How was your comfort zone built in the first place? Why is it that when you try to escape it and try to achieve a goal in an area of your life that you give up and come back to your comfort zone.

Speaker 1: 4:41

So that's really how we got here well, first I want to say I'm so sorry for your loss thank you, I appreciate it you know I can't, I can't even imagine, um, but you know I want.

Speaker 1: 4:54

You mentioned the comfort zone and and it's. I was smiling because you know there is so many memes and you know quotes and motivational sayings and inspirational sayings and whatever. But you know, can you explain like what the comfort zone is a little bit in? You know? You mentioned like how people get there. You know what's like the common reason people get stuck in that comfort zone.

Speaker 2: 5:13

Really, it comes down to three things really. One is what I what I called over the years, I call the middle class mentality, or the mediocre mentality, and this is the mentality that about 95% of the population, most of us, were raised on. And this is the mentality that about 95% of the population, most of us, were raised on. And the middle-class mentality teaches us certain things. When it comes to your money, for example, keep it in a bank where it's safe. When it comes to what we do for a living, work, income, we're taught go to school, get a job, go to school, get a job. Go to school, get a job. Nevermind the fact that when you walk around and see everyone with the greatest lifestyles and the most freedom, they're almost all self-employed, business owners, entrepreneurs right, we're taught. If it doesn't, you know, if it doesn't fit in the paradigm or the parameter, rather, of hourly wage or a salary with benefits, then it, then it can't be real kind of a thing. When it comes to generalities in life, we're taught to settle. We're taught to be like everybody else. We're taught to not strive. Also, we bring in.

Speaker 2: 6:12

Our comfort zone is also built up with our paradigms and, in its simplest form, a paradigm is just our worldview on something. So let's say you're somebody who you want to lose weight and you've tried losing weight before. Let's say you've always been heavy. Let's just say, well, your paradigm might be I'm heavy, I've always been heavy. I've tried diets before. They didn't work, but I'll give this a shot. What are the odds of making that work? That creates the comfort zone. And then, of course, the lastly is really our habits and our routines and our lifestyle. We just build a comfort zone over time that's mainly comprised of our beliefs, our paradigm and the habits and routines that we've created over time.

Speaker 2: 6:53

And it is the enemy of our success, absolutely.

Speaker 1: 6:56

No, it makes 100% sense and it is true when I talk to people as well. It's just because it didn't work one time doesn't mean it's not meant for you. I like to tell people as well, it's, you know, just because you haven't it didn't work one time doesn't mean it's not meant for you, you know. I like to tell, I like to tell people I say it in a way that it sounds shocking and almost rude until I explain it. Right, I'm like you're not special. And they're like what? And I'm like, yeah, you're not special, you're not special enough for this not to work only for you Out of all the people in the world, it could work for them, but yet it can't work for you.

Speaker 1: 7:25

Like, you know, you're not special, that's special. For that to happen, you know, you have to be willing to, to take the steps and to do it, even if it's, you know, on, you know, not fun and it's unpretty and all this, like, you got to go through the mud sometimes. So, um, when you mentioned you know, I believe you said 92% of people, you know, don't achieve their goals. Why do you think that is? I mean, is it because the comfort zone? Is there an underlying factor externally, internally?

Speaker 2: 7:55

Well, there's actually a lot of things, um, a lot of being able to succeed is just becoming aware of a lot of things that that people like you and I talk about. Like what you said with the special, that's really good. I'm going to use that actually, if it's okay. That makes a lot of sense, right, but a lot of it. I think the biggest things is like, let's say, the most common goal that is set in the world is something fitness related weight loss. As I'm sure you're aware of I know you're a fitness guy Weight loss is the number one goal set in the world. And here we are. We're recording this in January.

Speaker 2: 8:29

This is new year's resolution time, right, everyone's setting their resolutions and all that stuff. So the biggest thing is that I named my company after. It's what I call the disruption factor. It's the biggest thing that sends people back to their comfort zone, and what it is is, let's say, we take that person who wants to lose weight. They get excited about it. They, you know, they clean out their pantry. They resolve I'm not going to drink soda, I'm going to drink more water, I'm going to not snack late at night, I'm going to lay off the sweets, I'm going to eat healthier and I'm going to adopt some form of an exercise routine, right? They all the time they get excited and they embark on this.

Speaker 2: 9:03

Well, there's a couple of things that every goal has in common. Number one is when you embark on that goal, you're going to leave your comfort zone, and when you do that, you're going to face a ton of disruption disruption in your lifestyle, disruption in your routine. If you're that person trying to lose weight, you're going to start going to bed hungry. That sucks. You might get headaches from not having caffeine all day. Right, you do embark on an exercise routine and after a couple days you're so sore you can't even brush your teeth. You know it's all discomfort and you have cravings and it stinks.

Speaker 2: 9:40

And the second thing that goals have in common is not only are you going to encounter a ton of disruption in your life before you see an ounce of success, but the one thing almost every goal has in common is we're never where we thought we'd be, when we thought we'd be there. Like, I was expecting to lose 10 pounds my first month and I didn't. I lost one, I lost two. And so those two things mainly the comfort zone, I mean, I'm sorry, mainly the disruption factor. The disruption that occurs, being able to embrace it, look forward to it, your mentality, how you look at it which I teach a lot of and then, of course, not being where you want to be when you thought you'd be there. Those are the main two things that send people back to their comfort zone.

Speaker 1: 10:28

That, that one phrase, you know not being where you wanted to be when you thought you would be there. That, as simple as that sounds, that is such a powerful realization. Because, like that, I mean I was thinking of all these external things and internal things in life. Sometimes it is that right, you know, because I mean I've felt that before with you know, launching the business, launching the franchise and doing these things, I mean it took me 13 months to close my first franchise deal, right, and it was like through that whole time I was.

Speaker 1: 10:59

That one statement was a testament to pretty much every day past, like the third month, you know, and it was like getting so hard, like did I? Am I doing the right thing? Did I choose the right career? Did you know all these things? If you, if you would, you know, because some things can be, you know, influenced by external, you know motives or by, you know external factors, like friends, family, because, let's say, let's say, the goal isn't you know whether it's not just fitness, but maybe it is starting a podcast, maybe it is, you know, starting to post more about your fitness on social media. We tend to let people's, or we tend to let the perceived thought of people and their thoughts have effect or influence on our motive, if that makes sense 100%.

Speaker 2: 11:50

You define me 100%. I struggled in my business the first couple of years because of that. One of the things I teach people is trying I run people through an exercise of let's determine your character traits that keep you in your comfort zone, okay. So for me personally, I have four. Number one is I have an intense fear of rejection. I mean, it's bad, it's really an intense fear and it had paralyzed me early on in my business because I was so afraid to prospect and talk to people because if they said no, I'd want to like drive my car into a tree or something, right? My second character trait is I care way too much about what other people might think or say that was a real big one, right? My third one is I'm easily distracted. I've got a little ADD going on, right, I'll get, I'll, I'll intend to do something. The next thing you know I'm in right field doing something else and forgot what I was going to do, right? And the fourth thing is I'm a natural procrastinator. I'm not lazy, but I will tend to put things off. And I identified those four things, so we kind of put people through this.

Speaker 2: 12:57

But to the point that you're talking about, that is part of the middle class mentality that we've been entrained to think growing up is we put too much value and too much concern on what other people might think and what other people might say. And first of all, let's be honest. We all care about what people think. The people that beat their chest and say I don't care what anybody thinks of me Well, they actually care the most, they're just being insecure. We all care. Well, they actually care the most, they're just being insecure. We all care, but we can't care so much that it holds us back from pursuing an area of our life. There's five areas of our life. There's spiritual, relational, recreational, financial and physical fitness, diet Any of those areas that you're trying to take to a new level set a goal you're going to go, you got to get, you're going to go, you've got to get out of your comfort zone and you really I'm not going to be so bold as to say you just can't care about what people think because you're going to, but you can't care so much that it keeps you from pursuing an area of your life that you want to thrive and you want to achieve and you want to take to a new level.

Speaker 2: 14:06

So it's definitely something. You just there's not really an exercise for that, it's just you got to be cognizant of it and and I will say this because, how you said, you know you're not special well, I'll say this nobody cares about you, and I don't mean that. Meanly, I don't mean that bad, but people are so self-absorbed and we all have our own problems, we all have our own issues. We're all battling our own battles on a day-to-day basis. No one's paying that much attention to you that they're going to pick on you that much. They might say hey, you know, devin, what the hell is he doing? That's kind of weird. And then that's it. They're going to move on. They're not going to put your name on a poster, they're not going to blacklist you or anything like that. So we built this up in our heads Like the whole world's going to stop in their tracks, look at us and create a big conversation and keep talking about it. They're not.

Speaker 1: 14:55

No, definitely. Then I like the comparison like with that exact thing or idea is I try to give people because sometimes coming, sometimes come to the gym you know, my main business is a gym and most people they get nervous to walk in the gym, right, they already have that anxiety that they think everyone's watching them, right, and the way I like to explain it is like you think there's a spotlight or like a stage light on you, right, and that everyone else is doesn't have that stage light. In reality, how reality works is everyone has that same stage light and everyone is thinking how you're thinking right now. Right, they're not worried about you because they're thinking about everyone else looking at them. Yeah, right. And so when you start to realize that it lets you let down, you know your your worry a little bit, but, like you said, sometimes you just got to start doing and it's through repetition. There's nothing you can do to get those butterflies out, to get that nervous or anxious feeling out. You just have to start doing it.

Speaker 1: 15:53

I could tell you, you know firsthand when I started doing. You know, you know social media content and having to record myself talking. I'm not going to lie. Probably I recorded the same thing 30 times, you know, and it was like you know what are? What do people think about this one? And I thought the same thing.

Speaker 1: 16:07

But then you start doing it long enough and then that just becomes a part of who you are in the eyes of other people, right. And then it's like what you are worried about, it becomes the norm, right, it's like that that's what? Oh yeah, they're there, that's, you know, they're the Instagram person or they're the. You know they're the instagram person or they're the, you know, gym person. You know, but before you have this, like you know, self-identity, not issue, but you know, almost imposter syndrome, right, where it's like you go to the gym every day but you wouldn't call yourself a fitness enthusiast. What is a fitness enthusiast? Some of that goes the gym every day. Sometimes you are the title, but you don't want to give yourself the title just because you don't.

Speaker 2: 16:44

You're not where, yeah, and you know not only that, but there's another aspect, there's another side of you mentioning caring what people think or what people might say. A big part of the middle class mentality is when you do. You know, we all hang around people that are just like us, right in the same houses. They have the same jobs, they have the same kids, they have the same spouses. I mean, we typically hang around people that are just like us and that's another extension of your comfort zone, because we're all comfortable, because we're all similar.

Speaker 2: 17:24

And one day you wake up and you're excited about something. It might be. I'm committed to losing my weight and getting fit, or I'm going to stop complaining about my job and I found an opportunity, an entrepreneurial journey, whatever it might be, and I'm going to pursue it. To the people that you hang around with. You just became a threat to, and it's on a subconscious level. When you mentioned that you're going to embark on something to improve an area of your life and you mentioned that to the people that you're always with coworkers, friends, family they love you. But on a subconscious level, in a flicker of an instant, they had a thought that went something like this Well, if Devin does that and he succeeds, how am I going to feel about myself? Because I'm not willing to do that. I don't want to feel bad about myself, so I need to talk Devin out of doing that.

Speaker 2: 18:18

So these are the people that'll be like I don't know man, you tried those things before. I don't know man, that seems kind of risky. I don't know. I heard about that or that seems like it might be this way. They're not the ones they're going to be like oh well, you know you can do it. You tried that before. I mean it. Just you're not going to get this warm, encouraging reception from people around you. And that is part of the whole caring about what other people think, because that's a tough, that's a tough journey because you you, when you realize that people are almost trying to talk you out of it, they're almost trying to put you down for doing it. It's tough because these are the people that you care about and you want encouragement from them. So that's something to think about. A lot of it is just being aware of these things and preparing yourself for it and embracing it Like I'm going to start this, I'm going to do this. So I'm prepared for this, I'm prepared for the disruption. I'm prepared for all of this stuff.

Speaker 1: 19:13

No, it just reminded me of a post I made on my story the other day. It was, you know, a poll and it was people that want to see you win will help you win, right, and it was like do you agree now? Then someone messaged me off the poll of one of my good friends and another business owner. He, he agreed with it and then he was like the crazy flip side of that is that some people will help you that want to see you win, but just not as much as them exactly god.

Speaker 2: 19:44

That's so true, yeah, right, and I was like.

Speaker 1: 19:47

I was like, I was like, boom, I was like that, I was like man, you went so much more in deep thought than I did. You know, that was like, like that was on point. So the whole point I'm saying for that is like you have to know why you're doing it right. You have to know why you want to do it, why you want to achieve it, and then if other people are trying to help, awesome, but if other people are trying to talk you out of it and it's still a goal of yours, it's your goal. It's not their goal, it's your vision. It was put into your brain for a reason, right, not theirs. So you know. I do want to rewind for a second and just cause I mean, we talked about the middle-class family, middle-class mindset and and everything what, what did your parents do growing up?

Speaker 2: 20:29

If you don't mind me asking, yeah, my parents, my mom worked at a bank. My dad worked for Caltrans. You know ski yeah, my parents, my mom worked at a bank. My dad worked for Caltrans. You know Department of Transportation, working on roads. When I was about a freshman in high school, my dad started a business where it was a parking lot and road striping business. So he became an entrepreneur and actually was really successful. My mom left her job and they sold that business about 20 years ago. They did really well, so it was surprising to me that they didn't. You know, I delivered beer for a living. I didn't go to college. I'm from a small farming town up here. I delivered beer for a living and I found this opportunity to get these professional licenses and build a business and that's. I was pretty shocked. My parents were not supportive at all of that. They are now, you know, but but, but yeah, so that that's. I was very, very middle class, lower middle class, growing up.

Speaker 1: 21:19

What and what age were you when your, when your dad, you know, opened the business?

Speaker 2: 21:24

I was a. I think it was a freshman in high school, so I was yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1: 21:29

Okay. So so the the reason I say that is like it's cool because you got to see that transition right, because not a lot of people do get at least that insight, regardless of the you know the influence that your parents had verbally to you and trying to sway you out of it I mean that could have been out of love, you know, and them knowing how hard it was to get it up and running and know all the obstacles that you didn't really see, that were behind the scenes and I'm not wanting you to have to go through that level of discomfort. But you being able to see, you know, your dad have a career in transition later in life and be successful right like that, that's such a, that's such an amazing, you know moment in life that not a lot of people get and I I wonder if that inspired you and gave you that drive, you know, to realize that there is endless possibilities.

Speaker 2: 22:20

It did help. I've always been entrepreneurial, looking back from the time I was a kid, with getting getting jobs when I was 13 years old and you know starting little things that I would do and you know going back to that. You know when, when you're, when you embark on something and your coworkers and your friends maybe give you a hard time, try to discourage you. If your parents do, that comes from, like you said, that comes from they love you, don't want to see you get hurt.

Speaker 1: 22:46

Right.

Speaker 2: 22:47

Your friends and coworkers. They that sounds mean, but they don't want to see you succeed because they don't want to feel bad about themselves when they see you thrive and when they're not willing to do the things that you're willing to do For you. Going back and talking about embarking on this stuff. To rewind again, as you say, this is another reason you need to be surrounded by people that are like-minded by you, because when you do embark on that goal, you leave the comfort zone behind.

Speaker 2: 23:16

It is a lonely road. You are going against the grain because you're doing things most people won't do, and so it's important to be surrounded by people like that. So, if you are on a fitness plan, for example, yeah, you should walk, but it is important that it wouldn't be a bad idea to join a gym, because you will be surrounded by people that have the same goals as you, and it's also why it's very, very important that people learn how to properly set goals, which is a huge thing. Most people set a goal. They don't write it down. It's a whole process that I walk people through on the goal setting process to get ready for this.

Speaker 1: 23:48

No, it is so true and like the, the reason it brought up your, your parents and stuff like that, because you mentioned them, not, you know, giving you the support, Like when our parents didn't give me the support either. I wasn't lucky enough to have the, the, you know, that eyeopening moment of someone transitioning like that. You know, I did a little later in life with my aunt, but I didn't know she was. I didn't know until I was already an entrepreneur that she was actually an entrepreneur and so the my dad was a police officer, my mom was a pharmacy technician and stuff, and you know it was. It was one of those things where I was. I went the personal training route and my dad was like you need to get a career and those things. And I knew it was out of love and I started following that path and I was like, what am I doing? I was like I can't. I, I want to do this other thing. I know I can make it work, Went that route and now he's all on board. But, circling back to how you said with your friends and stuff, I was, I did go to college, you know, and got a degree and everything like that. Do I use that degree now, Maybe a little bit, but you know it's, it's not, it was more just to you know, condense the time of not knowing what I'm doing.

Speaker 1: 24:55

Sure, but what I will say is that, like you learn who your real friends are when you are on that, that goal, Like I was a part of a fraternity I had, you know, a dozen. You know so many friends. You know that would you'd call friends at the time. But when you're going through the mud, you learn who your real friends are that were are willing just to come help. You know like. Know, like you know, when you're opening a business, like, hey, do you need anything? Like do you want me to come out there and sell memberships with you? Like you don't pay me. Like I'll just come. Like we'll hang out. You know, yeah. Like you learn, you learn who your friends are when you go through things like that, or when you're in your own head of, like weight loss, I, I can't do this and they're like what do you mean? Get your lazy ass up, let's's go. We're going to go up and work out right now. You know, like those kind of people, that you start to learn that as you go but realize whether you have that person or you don't have that person or you don't know who that person is. You can always surround yourself with like-minded people, whether it's a networking group for entrepreneurs, whether it is finding a gym for fitness. Fitness and to you know something else is like.

Speaker 1: 25:57

You know someone like yourself, or a personal trainer or a coach. I mean, I'm a huge advocate for coaches because, not just because I was a personal trainer, but like even now, when we launched a franchise, I hired a franchise coach. Right, and not a coach, not a coach that you know. Just read a textbook and that was it, Someone that my my franchise coach. He launched his own franchise. He built it to 400 locations. Like someone else has walked the walk. When you're someone, someone like yourself, that has been through those things and can speak from experience, it's like you. If you don't hire someone like that or bring someone on your team like that, like your timeline is just that much longer, that person has already walked the walk. They are willing to, Absolutely.

Speaker 2: 26:38

Absolutely so much of it Devin, honestly, is you know, mindset is truly everything. Mindset is everything. And our species, as humans, we're a tangible species, right? If someone says, here, here's a, here's a planner, go through these exercises, they'll do it. Go through these exercises, they'll do it.

Speaker 2: 27:00

But if you're talking about mindset stuff and it's all mindset, because most people that set a goal and wanted they don't even set a goal they don't realize that they're setting goals. As I mentioned, we're in resolution season right now. Resolutions are goals, right, but people don't know how to set goals. They don't know. But if people just had the mentality and knew, knew, this is what I'm going to do and this is what I can expect, if they knew what they could expect, like what they're going to go through, what they're going to encounter, you know, going against their, their predisposed mentality, what their comfort zone means, what it's going to feel like leaving it, the disruption they're going to face, and if they just knew what to expect, it'd be a lot.

Speaker 2: 27:45

You wouldn't have 8% of people achieving goals. It's just that people don't know, cause how could you know until you know? And they just go out there and do it, and when they get hit with this stuff. It just, it just knocks them down and sends them back, and they always go. You could always tell when someone's about to give up on their goal because they enter the justification phase, right? Well, it's not like you know, it's not like I'm fat, it's not like I'm in that bad of shape, you know, or it's you know I was trying to business, right? Well, it's not like I. My job's awful, I mean, at least I have a roof over my head. Right, when they start justifying, that's the signal that they're about to let go and run back to their comfort zone.

Speaker 1: 28:20

Yes, yes, and I'm sure you see it in fitness.

Speaker 2: 28:23

I'm sure you see it all the time.

Speaker 1: 28:25

A hundred percent. All this I mean that's that's a daily you know, and that's that's the thing I love about it is getting to change the perception of someone about to abandon their goal or go the other way or justify why they're, you know, okay with where they're at, and getting them to see it from a new lens and all of a sudden them light up like a christmas tree when they hit that goal right. Um, what do you think are? Are maybe some of the big like miscontraceptions of goal setting? Or yeah, let's just, I mean with just goal setting in general.

Speaker 2: 29:03

Like what are some of the misperceptions in goal setting?

Speaker 1: 29:06

Yeah, like maybe the miscontraceptions or like the. You know people are setting goals but not doing it the right way. Sure, Absolutely.

Speaker 2: 29:23

The first thing you have to do is you have to set your goal and you need to make it as precise as possible. I want to lose weight. That's not enough of a goal, like how much weight do you lose, do you want to lose and when would you like to lose it? You got to be specific. You have to write it down, devin. You have to. Nobody does. And again, dude, this is that middle-class mentality. We don't want to write it down because we feel like it's kind of corny, right. Yet what would successful people tell you to do? They would tell you not only write it down, you need to be specific. You need to write it down and you need to put it somewhere where you see it all the time, like on your bathroom mirror, in your purse, on the dashboard of your car. And then you need to set 90-day, six-month and 12-month goals. You need to build your life in 90-day cycles, not weeks at a time, not a month at a time. 90-day cycles because everybody can get it up and go kill it for 90 days and it takes about 90 days to really create habits and start to see some iota of success with what you're trying to do. So you need to set a 90 day goal, a six month goal, a 12 month goal. So you've written down your goals. Then you need to cultivate your goals and what that means and again, people don't like to do this because they feel it's corny and if your friends see it they're going to tease you, they're going dude. What's that right? In other words, like, let's say, you want to, like you became an entrepreneur, right? So when you became an entrepreneur, you obviously set some financial goals, some income goals, right? This is what I'd like to do. Well, when you're there and when you're making that kind of money, what's your lifestyle going to be like? Are you going to buy a better house? Are you going to drive a better car? Are you going to take vacations that involve getting on an airplane? You know, whatever those things may be, you need to print them out, pictures of them, you need to surround yourself with them, whether it be a vision board or a goal board or just. I always just put pictures on a PowerPoint slide, print it out, laminate it and, like, stick it on my bathroom mirror, kind of a thing. Right, this stuff, again, if you're part of the 95% of the people that were raised with this middle-class, mediocre mentality, like most of us, doing this stuff is when most people put their pencil down and go. Put their pen down and go, ah, because they think it's corny. Yet these are the same people that are living a life of quiet desperation and they're living that definition of insanity. They're doing the same things over and over again but miraculously, they're expecting different results. It's these kinds of things, excuse me, that you have to do to set these goals. Then, of course, you create the action plan, and one thing that I would put on there because we're talking about the comfort zone a lot is there is an ultimate goal here. The goal is not just to leave your comfort zone, but to build a new one, and this is something people need to think about.

Speaker 2: 32:13

You know, a lot of this business disruption factor really got moving. Yes, a big part of it was when my daughter passed away, but that was right about the same time, about a little over three years ago, that I began my fitness journey, cause I've always been an athlete, I've always been in shape, and you know, I'm 57 years old, right, and I my entire decade of my forties I didn't go to the gym, I just did like the keto Atkins diet thing. I would gain weight. I would do the protein deal I drop it. Gain weight, drop it. I did that for 10 years and it was so bad for your body that by the end, like I did not only burn fat man, but I had like no muscle tone left. I looked almost gone. It was awful how bad I looked. So I stopped doing that.

Speaker 2: 32:56

But when I turned 50, I still didn't get in the gym. And it wasn't until about three and a half years ago that I woke up one day and I said okay enough, this is, I know what I need to do. And I did. I went to the gym, I joined the gym and the interesting thing is all the stuff, all of these concepts and exercises that I've been teaching people for 30 years. I had to now practice myself because I was going through it All the comfort, the disruption, leaving my comfort zone, those days going. Well, you know, it's not like I'm that bad, out of shape. Well, no, you can't do that. And I would push myself and push myself. You know, fast forward to today, I'm in the best shape of my life, other than maybe when I was 25, right, but the point is is about a year and a half ago.

Speaker 2: 33:44

So about a year and a half, two years into it I was traveling and a few days into my trip I was kind of grumpy.

Speaker 2: 33:47

I was kind of like man, why am I not in a great mood? And I realized it's because where I was traveling there, I was going to go like a week and a half without being in the gym. And I got excited because at that moment I knew that I had won, I knew it was over, because I had built a new comfort zone where I was only comfortable if I was doing the things needed to achieve and maintain my goals. And I was traveling and I wasn't in a position where I can go to a gym and I was uncomfortable. And that is the ultimate goal. And again, this is something people need to know. Yes, you need to leave your comfort zone behind, you need to embrace the disruption, but the goal here is to build a new comfort zone where now you almost feel like a fish out of water if days go by not doing what you need to do, and I'm sure you feel the same way about your fitness routine Devin right. So very important.

Speaker 1: 34:39

No, that is so important. And, guys, you just heard him say something that I said you know, in terms of setting goals, you need to write it down, that's. I didn't tell him to say that, so obviously there's something to it. So, if you miss that, write that down. You know you, you have to set tangible goals, or I mean they're going to be tangible. You know I want them to be scary, but then you need to break them down into quarters, into six months and so forth that we've talked about and set a specific number.

Speaker 1: 35:08

Not I want to lose weight, I don't want, it's not. I want to lose 10 or 20 pounds. Is it 10 or is it 20? Right, set numbers, set. You know specific goals on that. So I do want to say that's, that's awesome, and then everything else as well. Like, I can't, there's nothing I can even add on that. That's right, that was awesome, you know? Um, but as we start to wrap up, I like to ask one question, and before I asked this one question, I thought I just remembered I wanted to ask you something else. So actually I'm gonna put that question on pause. Real quick, based off everything you just said, I want to get your take on this. So you said you're in your comfort zone and you're trying to create a new comfort zone. Right, which I agree. But now what happens when you get to that new comfort zone?

Speaker 2: 35:56

Well, the good news is you're not going back to your old comfort zone. You won't let that happen. That's the great news. At that point, you're a high achiever. Your confidence has changed. That same person you were talking to that you said, hey, you're not special, because they didn't believe it could happen for them. They don't feel that way anymore. They've seen results. They're on their game. You kind of couldn't stop them if you tried, because they built a new comfort zone. And we know how it is. When you start to see those first results, those little bits of success, everything changes. All of a sudden you're like, oh my gosh, what used to be like drudgery and having to go do it Now you can't wait to go do it.

Speaker 2: 36:34

But at that point, when you build that new comfort zone, most people because they've become high achievers they're not gonna stop. They'll continue to set goals, they'll continue to push. You know. You know they lost weight. You know now they're gonna transition from just losing weight to now let's build some lean muscle, let's build some tone, or they might go from I lost weight to I think I might want to run my first you know short marathon, right, there's. That's typically what will happen. Some people can just stay there and maintain it, and a lot of people do that. But you'll decide. But the one thing we know almost guaranteed is, unless something absolutely, typically, medically, tragically happens to you, you're not going to go back to your old comfort zone, and that is the whole goal. And of course it's all the mindset stuff that's required to get there, which I teach a lot.

Speaker 1: 37:21

Whole goal, and of course it's all the mindset stuff that that's required to get there, which I teach a lot Exactly, that's after you're going to go with it. That's why I just wanted to give the listeners that you know what happens when you get there. It's not. It doesn't necessarily mean that that has to be the end destination, right, there's. There's other comfort zones. Above that. There's other, you know, things that you can achieve above that. It's just now. You've set a new baseline, a new homeostasis for who you are and where you're at. So the question I want to ask is and I will say this is not a tombstone, right? This is the legacy wall, right, and so on, shane Perry's legacy wall. What is the one lasting message that you would leave for the up and coming generations that you've learned along your journey in your life?

Speaker 2: 38:02

I 100% don't settle. Don't settle Because, devin, we're taught to settle man, and it's awful. And let me tell you something about the human species. We are not built and bred to settle and just be complacent. We are built for adventure. We are built for risk. And when I say risk, I don't mean go play Frogger on the freeway I'm not stupid stuff, right I mean we are built for adventure. We are built for risk.

Speaker 2: 38:31

You know, prince, the late great Prince, had a great quote that I've loved forever. He said life is death without adventure. And pushing yourself to not settle, pushing yourself to. You know you've got those five areas of life. Try to get better in every area, try to improve, be an example, do that. And the adventure of doing that and the risk of getting out there like you took that risk of entrepreneurship, devin, and you know what. You might've failed, but even if you failed, you'd have been exactly where you were in the first place, right? But when you were in the midst of that, still today, come on, it's adventurous. You took that risk and that risk makes your heart sore. It's good for your soul, right?

Speaker 2: 39:10

My message to people is don't settle. And it sounds kind of negative, I don't mean this, but just don't be like everybody else. If you want to succeed in any area of your life and you're wondering what to do, pick that area. Look at everybody else, what they do, do the opposite and you're going to win. And I don't mean that as a put down. It's just that our society is a society of people. We settle, we're happy being like everybody else. We don't push ourselves to any limits to achieve goals or thrive in an area, and that's not good for us. It's not good for us because, again, we are built for adventure and risk.

Speaker 1: 39:50

No, that is so true. I love that. Where can people connect with you at?

Speaker 2: 39:53

Yeah, my website primarily, which is disruption-factorcom information about myself. You can reach out, contact me. I do run that. I've got a team of people, but I insist on being on the front end, so anything you send, I'm going to be the one that gets it. I don't have it go through a person. I don't like that. My online course is on there. My online course is called From Disruption From Comfort Zone to Success, and it's had a lot of success. I've got a lot of personal trainers around the country that have become affiliates with that. They use it for their clients and that's on there. And then, of course, my social media on Instagram. It's real Shane Perry or disruption factor on Instagram and I'd love to hear from people and I just love helping people.

Speaker 1: 40:39

Awesome, guys, that all that will be in the show notes. If you're watching on YouTube, it'll be in the description. Guys, make sure you guys share this episode with a friend. You know we are still in the beginning of the year and you know, just because you may have fell off of what you originally started for your new year's resolution doesn't mean that the year is lost, right? So if you know someone else that's going through it in in trying to push themselves to be better, Make sure you guys send this episode to them. But, Shane, I just want to take a second to say thank you so much again for taking the time out of your day to hop on the Mindset Cafe, Absolutely.

Speaker 2: 41:09

You know I'm a big fan of your show. I've been listening to it and I follow it.

Speaker 1: 41:13

I appreciate it so.

Speaker 2: 41:14

I'm honored to be here. You do great work and I hope your following continues to grow because you deliver a lot of great information, so thanks for having me.

Speaker 1: 41:22

Thank you so much. We'll talk soon.