How to Get Through the Holidays When Facing Pet Loss

Why do the holidays feel so much heavier when you’ve lost a pet, or when you know a goodbye is coming soon?
If you’re finding yourself dreading traditions, avoiding gatherings, or feeling pressure to “hold it together,” this episode is for you.

Holiday pet grief can show up in unexpected ways, especially during a first holiday without your pet or when you’re living in that anticipatory space of knowing time with your pet is limited. In this conversation, licensed clinical social worker and author Nancy Gordon helps make sense of why this season hurts more and how to move through it with compassion instead of pressure.

BY THE TIME YOU FINISH LISTENING, YOU’LL DISCOVER:

If you’re grieving a pet you’ve already lost:
• Why holidays intensify pet grief, even when you think you’re coping just fine
• How to prepare emotionally for gatherings so you’re not blindsided by questions or comments
• Ways to honor your pet without forcing traditions or “last moments” to be perfect

If you’re anticipating the loss of a pet:
• What anticipatory grief looks like and why it can quietly take over the season
• How to stay present with your pet and yourself without burning out emotionally

This episode is dedicated to Rosy, Debbie’s beloved dog, and to every pet parent navigating the holidays with a missing piece of their heart.

CONNECT WITH NANCY GORDON
Email: nancygordon7practices@gmail.com

Phone: (858) 952-0936

Petworks.com to schedule a session with Nancy: Discounted first session.

Website: growbeyondgrief.com

Instagram devoted to pet loss and grief: @nancy.gordon.global 

OTHER LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Listen to Nancy's first appearance on the show in 2023: "The Grief Before Goodbye: Preparing For Your Pet's Final Days"

Join us in The Pet Parent Hotline Insiders

Chapters

• 0:00 When the Holidays Feel Heavier Than Everyone Else Realizes
• 4:20 Why the First Holiday Hits So Hard
• 10:45 Preparing for Gatherings, Questions, and Comments
• 17:30 Handling “It’s Just a Dog” and Other Painful Comments
• 24:30 Anticipatory Grief and the Pressure to Make It Perfect
• 30:15 Staying Present With Your Pet Without Burning Out
• 35:45 Support, Resources, and a Gentle Closing

Transcript

Holiday Pet Grief: The First Holiday or the Last One

HOST

Amy Castro

GUEST

Nancy Gordon, LCSW
 Licensed Clinical Social Worker
 Author, I Miss You Already: Preparing for the Unbearable Loss of Your Pet

SUMMARY

The holidays can feel especially heavy when you’ve lost a pet or when you’re caring for a pet you know you may lose soon. In this episode, Amy Castro is joined by licensed clinical social worker Nancy Gordon for an honest, compassionate conversation about navigating holiday traditions, family gatherings, and emotional landmines during pet loss and anticipatory grief. Together, they explore how to prepare for difficult moments, set boundaries, manage unhelpful comments, and stay present with your pet and yourself during the season.

LINKS IN SHOW NOTES!

TRANSCRIPT NOTE

This transcript has been lightly edited for clarity and readability while preserving the original conversation and intent.

CHAPTERS

00:00 Holidays After Pet Loss or When Goodbye Is Coming
 00:24 Show Intro
 01:10 Dedication to Rosy and listeners
 01:35 Meet Nancy Gordon, LCSW
 02:02 First holiday without a pet
 03:59 Preparing for gatherings and questions
 06:33 Finding balance between participating and opting out
 09:21 Honesty and why pretending backfires
 12:06 Preparing responses to difficult questions
 15:39 Handling “it’s just a dog” comments
 19:17 Asking for support and setting boundaries
 23:43 Anticipatory grief and the pressure to make it perfect
 27:53 When worry takes over the holiday season
 28:21 Staying present with your pet
 31:28 Support systems and professional help
 32:00 Nancy’s book and resources
 34:34 Understanding grief and responding to it
 36:26 Closing thoughts and Insiders invitation

TRANSCRIPT

Amy Castro (00:00)
If you're heading into the holidays after losing a pet, or you're caring for a pet that you know you may lose soon, this season can feel heavier than anyone around you might realize. Today we're going to talk about how to move through the holidays with grief and make the season gentler on your heart. So stay tuned.

You’ve reached The Pet Parent Hotline, your lifeline to practical solutions for your toughest pet parenting challenges. I’m your host, Amy Castro, and I’m here to help you cut through the noise and turn expert advice into step-by-step strategies so you can stop chasing your tail and start enjoying life with pets again.

Hey there, I’m Amy Castro, and this is The Pet Parent Hotline. The holidays can bring up a lot of emotions, especially when you’re missing a pet who has been part of your traditions for many years, or you’re in that space knowing that a goodbye is coming soon. It can feel like the whole world is celebrating and you’re just trying to hold it together.

Before we begin, I want to dedicate this episode to Rosy, our listener Debbie’s sweet girl who recently crossed the rainbow bridge, and to everyone listening who is moving through this season with a little more tenderness in your heart. Please know that you’re not alone.

Today, to help us navigate this season, I’m joined by Nancy Gordon. Nancy is a licensed clinical social worker who has spent decades helping people navigate grief, trauma, and major life transitions. After experiencing several major losses of her own, she shifted a significant part of her work toward supporting pet parents through the kind of heartbreak that most people underestimate. Nancy, welcome back to the show.

Nancy Gordon (01:55)
Thank you so much. It’s an honor to be here. I really love this podcast. It’s a great service.

Amy Castro (02:02)
Thank you. You were actually my very first guest when I launched the show, and we talked about grief broadly. Today we’re focusing on grief during the holidays. I’m really glad you’re back.

If this is someone’s first holiday after losing a pet, what do you think helps people get through this season?

Nancy Gordon (02:43)
That’s a big question because there are so many variables. Was the loss sudden? Was it anticipated? How long was the pet part of the family? Was it the only pet? All of those factors shape how grief shows up, especially during the holidays.

Holidays are hard even without loss. With pet loss, they can feel overwhelming. One of the most helpful things people can do is prepare. Preparing doesn’t mean forcing feelings. It means thinking ahead about what might be difficult and how you want to respond.

[Transcript continues exactly as spoken through closing, unchanged in content, names only, timestamps preserved.]

Amy Castro (36:26)
Nancy, thank you so much for being here and for helping us navigate such a difficult but important topic. And to everyone listening, if this season feels heavier than ones in the past, please know we’re thinking of you. Nancy’s contact information will be in the show notes, and you’re always welcome in the Pet Parent Hotline Insiders Group to share and connect with others who understand. We’ll see you next week.