The Goal vs. The Journey

New Year,  New You? While setting goal crushing resolutions is one way to kick off the new year, join Marsharelle for a quick chat on the importance of the journey on your way to the "big prize". There is a lot of life to live between now and achieving all of those giant goals you may have pasted on your vision board. How are you living it? Let's discuss!

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Transcript

Hey Everyone! Happy New Year! I hope that your transition into 2023 was smooth, that you are feeling refreshed and ready to Own Your Power, or simply continue doing so if you are already crushing it in this area. As I mentioned last week, I found myself a little off balance in this area, but I am back up and ready to get after it because I have the power to adapt. Yes, I am using my affirmations! Have you been using yours? I’d love to hear about the impact that affirmations or anything else in your power toolkit  have had in your life, so please join us on IG @definingyourlife to share your thoughts with our growing village.

Now, I know that it’s the beginning of the year and it's customary to talk about resolutions and goals and all that, so I guess I’m kinda following suit in some way. But since I’m not a true New Years resolution girl, I want to chat about The Goal vs The Journey. 

Now, I love vision boards, but for me, I normally make the board and neglect to find it a permanent, practical home. Like I may  find it a wall space, but normally it’s a wall that’s not visible to me daily. Or if I place it somewhere accessible, it’s normally tucked behind a desk or a chair and I have to pull it out every time I want  to review it. This board displacement was not giving me a positive, seamless vision board experience throughout the year and made creating the vision board a less appealing activity for me. However, not too long ago I heard someone talking about a vision book and I thought that was a stellar idea- a portable vision board that I can carry with me, easily access and expand on throughout the year- brilliant!! So, I sat down with a few friends and went about the business of crafting my vision journal over my break.

What I love most about this idea is not just the portability, but that it fills in the gaps of what I personally need from a vision board. And that is the opportunity to break down into bite size pieces what it takes to achieve the visions on my board, map out the journey, and capture that process all in one place. Because achieving the end goal is great. But having gone through the journey and captured it to reflect on later is what makes it even better. 

I want to start off by asking you this- Do you value the journey? The journey is where life is actively happening. We often get so set on getting to that end goal that we underestimate what it took to get there and just how much we gained in the process. How we were shaped and molded just so that we can fit into that well dreamed picture we’ve created of our future selves. Or, how we were led down a different path. 

There are some things that we can be so sure are for us, that we will do anything to pursue and accomplish them only to find that it just isn’t what we thought once we get there. And there are other things, opportunities that come our way that we quickly dismiss because they aren’t aligned with the vision we’ve created for our lives. But some of those things keep coming back up until we finally rediscover it as if it were the first time and find that was the path we should have been taking all along. 

How can we aid ourselves in sorting out which paths are viable for us? If I had to guess I would say it’s living not only for the goal, but for the journey as well. Don’t discount any of your experiences! The totality of your experiences all add up to create a full, rich life. No one likes a one note meal. And I can say the same about life. Live in the layers!

I once listened to a guest speaker my sr year in college who answered the question, what is the best advice you would give to those who are graduating and starting on their way?'' His response was to not shut anything down because you never know where an opportunity might lead you. Sometimes a certain opportunity may appear to have no connection at all to your ultimate goal. But what you don’t know at the time is, what may look like a terrible detour along the way could very well be the thing that connects you to your desired goal in the end. And it may look the way you pictured it all along, but it may look new. And I have learned that even if it doesn’t look the way I thought it should look, oftentimes it’s still just as exciting and desirable once I make it to that finish line. But we won’t find out if we don’t count the journey as well as its detours as an important part of reaching our end goals. 

The journey is a place of discovery. What our likes and dislikes are. What truly serves us. Who our fellow journeyers are. What matters most to us. The journey is a place to put down goals and pick up new ones as we continue to craft and refine our lives in each season. 

And something else to consider is that our journey like so many other things isn’t just for ourselves. For our personal gain. Whether you identify as a mentor or a mentee, an auntie, parent, whatever- there is someone out there watching directly or indirectly. And folks get wrapped up in your experience of the end goal. It’s important that we inspire others not only with what we’ve achieved, but how we achieved it. How we navigate through the process. And all of those jewels come from the journey. We can help those seeking guidance from us to map the journey and maybe we can help to make their journey a little easier. 

If you feel like, you know what Marsh, all this is great, but I just need tangible items that I can check off of my list so that I feel like I’m accomplishing something and not just floating through each day on this journey in 2023. Fine,  ok, I’ll get off my soapbox. But let me encourage you to consider micro goals. 

While we were creating our vision journals, a friend of mine came across an article that focused on micro goals. And y’all know how I feel about the power of words and shifting language. So, I have decided to transfer some of the things that I have on my normal to-do list to a list of micro goals. Sidenote- See what I mean about the vision journal? - where else could I capture all of these sub categories in one place? The vision journal will allow me to house it all together- my to-do lists, micro and ultimate goals and capture my thoughts during the process. This goal focused journaling definitely resonates with me!

Anyway, I tend to create lists that can go on and on and that becomes very tedious and can oftentimes feel unachievable. But everything doesn’t belong on the same list! Sure you have your to do list for day to day stuff, but your micro goals fall in between those to do’s and your vision. And they are very satisfying to check off the list. As someone who is more of a dreamy thinker rather than methodical, this is helpful for me because it reminds me of what it takes to get to the end goal and I feel a sense of accomplishment along the way as I hit those micro goals. I have been working this way for a while now, but I like how micro goals sound, so that’s what I’ll be calling them from now on. You all know- It’s whatever it takes to stay motivated.  

So - what are some key micro goals that you can focus on while on the journey to your major goals this year? Have you given thought to what the journey to accomplishing those goals looks like? We tend to focus on all the effort and grind that it will take to get to that finish line, but can we please focus on some positives, some rewards that we’ll be graced with along the way?

We have to make sure that we are balancing hustle and grind with contentment and happiness so that we don’t miss the special celebratory moments along the way and we don’t miss the pivots we should take if they pop up. 

I’m going to leave you with another gem from Auntie Oprah today: “The key to realizing a dream is to focus not on success but significance, and then even the small steps and little victories along your path will take on greater meaning.”

Your journey is so important. You are the journey. So celebrate along the way. And then celebrate the goal crushing once you get there. Remember, every moment matters. I have been celebrating my podcasting journey and a) my ability to be consistent b) the growth that the podcast has been seeing even in small increments. If you wanna celebrate along with me and help me to meet my goal of growing this podcast even more, please subscribe, review and share with a friend. And I’d love to hear what goals you may have. Send me a note, DM, or comment on IG to keep the conversation going. I’m more than happy to be an accountability partner if needed as well. Thank you so much for listening. I can’t wait to chat again next week. Take care until then…