Episode 416: Monday Mindset: Life Is Too Short for the Wrong Circle

🎙️ In today's Monday Mindset episode...

Who you spend time with matters more than you think. In this episode, I shared a powerful reminder that our mindset, confidence, and outlook are often shaped by the people around us—both inside and outside of school.

You'll learn how to protect your energy, set healthy boundaries, and avoid letting other people's negativity or limiting beliefs influence your own goals and growth. Plus, I shared a simple mindset shift that can help you navigate challenging conversations and school cultures without losing sight of what's possible.

If you're ready for a mindset reset and want to be more intentional about the voices influencing your life, this episode is for you. 💛

✨ Don't forget! Our FREE Summer Workshop starts next week.
Register here: www.ebteacher.com/workshop

Transcript

Welcome And The Circle Idea

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Well, hello, teachers, and welcome back to another Monday mindset. I'm really glad that you are here for this one because I want to share something with you that actually came up in a conversation with one of my girlfriends today. We were talking on Boxer, just about friendships and, you know, certain circumstances and things that come up in our lives with friends or with spouses or with partners or in dating, whatever it might be. And it made me really think about, you know, who we let into our lives and about the circles that we build around ourselves. And there's, you know, a saying that says, like, you're uh, you you become like the five people you spend your the most time with. And I think that that's really an interesting concept because if you think about who really is helping you grow and become a better person, are those the five people that you spend the most time with right now? Or do you have somebody in your life that is an energy vampire that's really like sucking the life out of your experience of your energy, of the things that you've got going on in your own life too? And I just think it's really important to consider that and to really spend time intentionally thinking about, you know, not ruthlessly cutting people out, but really looking at who is helping serve us in becoming the best versions of ourselves. And are we too doing that for our friends as well and for the people in our lives as well?

Energy Vampires And Intentional Choices

SPEAKER_00 1:37

I wanted to share a quote on Instagram that I saw recently, and it said, if they can't help you grow, let them go. And like my first instinct was like, nah, like, can that be true all the time? Like, that's pretty ruthless. Like, I'm I'm not really like that. Can it really be that simple? But the more I thought about it and the more I sat with it, I don't think it's necessarily like cutting people off. I just think it's about getting really intentional about the energy that you surround yourself with every single day. Because here's what I know to be true, and what I found in my own life, and I'm sure that if you reflect, you see this as well, is that the people around you either lift you up or they quietly show you your limitations or very loudly show you your limitations. Right? There are certain things in my life that I won't share with certain people because I don't want their opinion of it, because I know that they're gonna try to take the wind out of my sails. And I have to be super protective of my energy. And so I just think about, you know, who you are spending the most time with. Are you intentional about that?

How School Culture Shapes You

SPEAKER_00 2:43

And I think about this so much in the context of teaching, because teaching can be such an isolating profession, right? You're in your own room, you're doing your own thing, and the culture of the building that you're in has an enormous impact on how you feel about what you're doing, right? If you are surrounded by colleagues who are burnt out and bitter and convinced that nothing is gonna get better, that energy seeps into your life. It just does. Like, even if you're not consciously aware of it, especially if you're not consciously aware of it.

A Script For Negative Talk

SPEAKER_00 3:15

One of the things that I talked to, like a mindset coach about recently was, well, you know, someone in my life is constantly saying X, Y, and Z. And I said, How do I separate myself from that? Because I I keep hearing it from them and they're in my family. There's nothing I can do about it. And they said their suggestion, which I thought was really interesting, and I started practicing, was when they say X, Y, and Z, that I say to myself, huh, that's a really interesting thought that they're having. So that I'm like separating my experience from it so that I don't start to adopt those beliefs or those habits or those ways of viewing the world because I don't want to. I want to view it my way through all the work that I've done, right? And not as a victim. And I just think that as a teacher, it's extremely important to just be aware of your circle, not necessarily like judge anyone in it. Like you're not trying to set yourself on a pedestal and be like better than anybody else, but just to get honest with yourself and be like, you know what? I don't really want that in my life anymore. Like who in your life makes you feel more like the teacher you want to be, the person you want to be? Like who leaves you feeling energized and excited and full of possibility? And who, if you're being really honest, kind of drains that out of you, right? Are we surrounding ourselves with energy givers or energy takers? And quite frankly, are you an energy giver or are you an energy taker? So just something to think about, something to consider, choosing your circle wisely.

Building A Small Trusted Circle

SPEAKER_00 4:51

When I look at my circle, I don't have a ton of friends, but I have like five really solid female friendships. And it's not the type of female friendship that hat like we have to talk every single day. But it's like someone who I, people, women who I deeply trust and whose opinion I value, who have big visions for their lives just like I do, who are gonna cheer me on, who are gonna get excited for me, who are gonna pump me up, and who I get to do the same thing for. And I just think like I'd rather have that super small circle of really intentionally chosen women in my life than a bunch of superficial relationships with people or relationships with people who suck the joy out of life because like we're only here once and these moments are fleeting and life goes by fast. So just something to consider, something to be aware of.

Boundaries With Colleagues That Drain

SPEAKER_00 5:49

And, you know, you can't do a whole heck of a lot with the colleagues that are in your building per se. But you can start to separate yourself from them as much as possible and creating your own boundaries and also having an internal dialogue with yourself of when they say something that does not serve the type of teacher that you want to be, to say something to the effect of, huh, that's an interesting thought that they're having. Because that thought belongs to them and doesn't have to impact or rain on your parade or the life that you're trying to build for yourself.

Weekly Wrap And Workshop Invite

SPEAKER_00 6:24

All right, you guys. Here's to another week of Living Intentionally. I will see you tomorrow on the podcast. We are talking all about the real reason that your students aren't retaining what you teach. And then I'll be back again on Thursday. That one's gonna get really good too. So make sure that you listen to both episodes this week and also sign up for our summer workshop series. We're talking all about how to engage your students and get them mastering the standards. Go to ebeteacher.com forward slash workshop to save your free seat, giving away a MacBook error, two Hue Document Cameras. It's gonna be a ton of fun, and I cannot wait to see you there. All right, you guys, I will see you tomorrow on the podcast. Bye, everyone.