Goals, Grit, and Some Woo Woo Sh*t

When Strong Women Feel Dead Inside with Iona Holloway

Oonagh Duncan Episode 139

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Have you ever looked around at your life and thought, "Nothing is technically wrong... so why do I feel so disconnected from it?"

That is exactly what we're diving into this week with speaker, coach, and author Iona Holloway.

Iona's new book, Do the Brave Thing, starts with a question that hit me right between the eyes: What happens when you've done everything right, collected all the gold stars, built the life that looks impressive on paper... and still feel dead inside?

In this conversation, Iona shares the rock bottom moment that forced her to confront a life built on perfectionism, achievement, and invisible suffering. We talk about the pressure so many women carry to be strong, capable, and endlessly high-functioning, and why those qualities can sometimes become the very thing keeping us stuck.

One of my favorite parts of our conversation was Iona's distinction between being strong and being brave. Strength can look like gritting your teeth and carrying more than you should. Bravery asks something different. It asks you to listen to yourself, tell the truth about what you want, and tolerate the discomfort that comes with change.

We also explored how fear disguises itself as practicality, perfectionism, procrastination, and even the stories we tell ourselves about why we're the exception. The woman who can't. The one for whom it's harder. The one who should wait until she's ready.

Spoiler alert: ready is not coming.

Iona shared her powerful "5 and 95 Rule," the idea that a brave life is one that makes five-year-old you happy and ninety-five-year-old you proud. It is simple, memorable, and honestly one of those ideas that lingers long after the conversation ends.

If you've been quietly wondering whether there's more available to you than simply being impressive, this episode is your reminder that feeling alive matters too.

What’s Inside:

  • Why being impressive and feeling alive are not the same thing
  • The difference between being strong and being brave
  • How fear hides inside perfectionism, procrastination, and practicality
  • Iona's "5 and 95 Rule" for making braver decisions

The thing I keep coming back to from this conversation is that bravery rarely looks cool. Most of the time it looks awkward, uncertain, and wildly uncomfortable. What's one brave thing you've been avoiding lately?  DM me on Instagram…I'd genuinely love to hear your answer. 

Mentioned in This Episode:

Brave Thing
Do the Brave Thing Book
Iona Holloway on Instagram
Iona Holloway on LinkedIn
Get Healthy AF Book Free
Oonagh Duncan on Instagram
Fit Feels Good
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