A Contagious Smile Podcast

Addiction, Love, And The Weight We Carry

• Victora Cuore; A Contagious Smile, Who Kicked First, Domestic Violence Survivor, Advocate, Motivational Coach, Special Needs, Abuse Support, Life Skill Classes, Special Needs Social Groups

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Two golden retrievers at our feet, a heavy topic on the table. We dive straight into addiction’s messy reality: the slow drift from “I’m fine” to morning liquor in coffee, the way denial dresses up as control, and the brutal truth that love alone can’t outmuscle a substance. We talk openly about losing a close friend to drugs after a toxic on-again relationship, and how survivors shoulder the weight of unanswered questions long after the funeral. If you’ve ever tried to save someone who didn’t want to be saved, you’ll recognize the heartbreak and the hard-won lessons here.

We also get practical. What boundaries actually help a family survive addiction? We share concrete strategies: no-cash policies, essentials-only support, rides to treatment not to dealers, proof-of-program attendance, and clear relapse plans. A trip to the ER becomes a conversation about avoiding pain med triggers, while a smart speaker’s near 911 call turns into a safety tip for anyone facing abuse—configure emergency phrases, document everything, and keep an exit plan ready. It’s not cold; it’s compassionate structure designed to protect your sanity while keeping a door open to recovery.

Beyond substances, we map the terrain of narcissistic abuse and generational trauma—and how to heal without losing your voice. Writing projects become tools for reflection, helping you spot manipulation, rebuild boundaries, and trust your memory over someone else’s narrative. Between tough subjects, we keep room for light: a new puppy on the way, community hugs in checkout lines, and playful jabs that remind us joy can live beside pain. If you’re navigating addiction, caregiving, or recovery from toxic dynamics, you’ll find clarity, candor, and a few tools you can use today.

If this resonated, subscribe, share with someone who needs it, and leave a review to help others find the show. Your support keeps these conversations going and the resources flowing.

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Banter, Dogs, And A Heavy Topic

SPEAKER_01

You're disgusting. Howdy, y'all. Welcome to another episode of Extase Smile Podcast here with Victoria and Michael. And we have our two lovely golden retrievers in the room with us. One with the tennis ball.

SPEAKER_03

Rusty.

SPEAKER_01

And the other one jealous to get that tennis ball.

SPEAKER_03

Hi, babe.

SPEAKER_01

Howdy.

SPEAKER_03

Hi.

SPEAKER_01

So we just got back from dinner. We're full of energy and full and ready to take our old man nap here at 8 o'clock.

Naming Addiction And Family Impact

SPEAKER_03

No, don't say it in the plural sense of we, because I don't take old man naps. You take old man naps. Suck it. You can't say suck it on air. Yes, I can. Keep it PG. Suck it. That is PG. That is so PG. Okay, so we have a very serious conversation to have.

SPEAKER_01

What's that?

SPEAKER_04

Let's talk about addiction. Let's talk about what it does to a family. The signs, the what to do, how to handle. Just overall in general. I mean it is something I don't think anybody is prepared for on any level.

SPEAKER_02

Cricket.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. You think you can handle it first. You think, okay, you you run through the process in your mind, okay, this is the way it should play out. But in reality, it does not. And it's a lot more stressful than you realize until you're there. Now I went through I went through alcohol addiction with my grandfather, and I saw firsthand basis drug addiction with one of my cousins and how it just tears you up. And no matter how much you put forth the effort and money and time and energy to help that individual, if they don't want it, you man, you are wasting your time. And yeah.

A Friend Lost To Drugs

Alcohol Spiral And Denial

SPEAKER_04

Well, and I had one of the closest friends that literally was like a brother to me. And I still I still can't imagine the fact that he's gone. Like it's still so hard for me. He was like a brother to me. When I would have surgery, he would come up and just keep faith company. When I was with her in the NICU, bless his heart. He would come up, get my nasty laundry, take it back, wash it for me, and bring it back. And he saved me in so many ways because I wouldn't leave her side. And so he would, you know, do the things, you know, that I couldn't do because I wasn't going to leave. And he was always front and center. He got dedication tattoos for both Faith and I that were absolutely stunning and beautiful. And he dated his high school girlfriend on and off, on and off. And she was a drug addict. And so many issues, he went to jail for her because they got pulled over, and she literally put the drugs on him and they were on his person. And he didn't want anything to happen to her. So he took the fall. And then they got into a fight. And you know, I'm gonna add trigger warnings here. And this conversation really isn't for younger people, so you might want to pause and make sure that they don't hear any of this. She and him got into an argument after they had been intimate, and she tried to file rape charges on him. And the police responded, and it was some of the good old boys you knew from your area back in the day. It was your precinct, believe it or not. And I reached out and I spoke to them, and he had me on the phone crying. And I talked to them, and I was like, this is absolutely not, it's not. I'm telling you, it's not, because this man absolutely would never ever, I would put my my name on it that he wouldn't have. And so I said, you know, is there anything on her person that shows anything? And there wasn't. And so she made false allegation. And then she came clean and said no. She was just pissed off at him. And that's what she was trying to do is get him in trouble. So she, I guess, spiked his drink at some point and he got addicted. And he did the right thing. He went to drug rehab and got clean. And so next thing I know, she came up behind him and injected him with something, some kind of drug. And he ended up back, you know, doing them again. And this is a guy who you could call at three in the morning, and he would show up at 3 15. And, you know, there were times that he would sleep on my floor to, you know, help me be there when I was up round the clock with Faith, making sure, you know, that I had an extra set of ears. And he would stay on the floor and watch TV or or do whatever while I took naps and he would listen for her machines and just be right there. And I found out that, you know, she got him back on drugs again and he took his life too. I can't believe that it'd be two years. I cannot believe it's been almost two years. And she called me and told me. And I can't even tell you the impact it had on me when I found out. And he lived and breathed for his dogs. And he was even, he was even taking care of one of Faith's dogs. And he had his dogs around him. And when they found him, he was laid out with his dogs right there with him. Because that was his whole world. And had I known that, I would have gone and gotten him. But I didn't know till after the fact. And it's heart-wrenching because they think that it stops their pain. But in the long run, it just everyone else that truly and unconditionally cares about them, it doesn't stop our pain at all. It just doesn't.

SPEAKER_01

So let me ask you, Victoria, because I will tell you, I will tell you years later that I was not. Okay. Everybody all y'all know that I've been married three times. This is my soulmate, my third, my final, my best, my everything that I shouldn't have married the first go around.

SPEAKER_04

When I was around.

SPEAKER_01

I had my head up my ass.

SPEAKER_04

Can you say that one more time just for editing so I can take that?

SPEAKER_01

My head up other people's asses.

SPEAKER_04

Literally and figuratively. And I'm gonna take that sound bite and keep it, just so you know.

SPEAKER_01

The second marriage I started getting abused. Okay.

SPEAKER_04

On more levels than you wanna say.

SPEAKER_01

I didn't get physically abused. It was emotional, okay, and verbal.

SPEAKER_04

And financial.

SPEAKER_01

And oh no, that was the first one.

SPEAKER_04

No, the first no, the second one did too. No, she did. I promise you, she did.

SPEAKER_01

And so y'all, I I started drinking. And I started drinking. And I kept on drinking. And I'd come home from work and drink. Weekend, drink. Okay? Beer, liquor, mixed drinks, things things like that. And then I started carrying a cooler to work in the back of the pickup truck. After work, hit the parking lot, pop open a beer, say goodbye to your fellow workers for the day. You called me. And then on the way out, you called me. Driving with an open container. Hit the bar on the way home. Grab a beer. Say hello to the bartender, and then head to the house. Once you get to the house, have some more beers with dinner. Okay. Just to get me through the constant nagging, the arguments, the fight that I knew I would have. Then it got to the point where I'd wake up, get my coffee, pour in some liquor. Okay? I like to have apple crown in my coffee. Alright? That gets me going. Now I'm taking this shit to work. I'm going to work drinking. Drinking on the job. And driving. Drinking after. Drinking before. After during. Okay? But I can honestly, I can tell you right now, I was not addicted. I did not have a problem. Right?

SPEAKER_00

Well, let me first tell you that, right? You can say that. You believe me? You could say that.

SPEAKER_01

How many of the listeners are saying that was you you had a problem, buddy?

SPEAKER_04

Okay, well, let me first say I'm so proud of you for opening up and being so vulnerable by discussing this. Well, that took you long enough. But I'm so proud of you because it it takes a lot as a man to open up and say, I did this. And so thank you for that because I know so many people can, you know, it's one thing to hear it, it's another thing to admit it. And so people could be listening to this and say, Wow, that's me. But I'm not saying it to side note how many did we have last year when we got our thing?

SPEAKER_01

Um, I know we were we were well over 40 million listeners, but the downloads we had last year were 500 million, I think.

SPEAKER_04

5 million, uh 528 million. Yeah, yeah, we got all that.

SPEAKER_01

So half a billion downloads.

SPEAKER_04

That's crazy, right?

SPEAKER_01

Crazy, crazy, crazy. Y'all were listening to this redneck and this beautiful woman over here.

SPEAKER_04

Whatever.

SPEAKER_02

Who forgets to take out her trash cans?

SPEAKER_01

I'm gonna kill Alexa.

Calling Out Addiction And Caregiver Pain

SPEAKER_04

I love her. She is so hilarious to you. She doesn't like you at all. Let's go back. Hold on, stop. We'll put it stop. So if you were to ask me clinically from my training and everything else, or from what I've been through, would I say that you had a problem? Yes. I would. I would say that you had a problem.

SPEAKER_01

Most everybody would. Right. Except for me. Correct. Right? Yeah. And that's the way addicts are. Yes.

SPEAKER_04

It's for the most part. Sometimes they do. Sometimes they admit it. Believe it or not, some say it so that they can continue to get it. Because some people are like, you can't cut it cold turkey. And then they'll say, Well, I'm an addict. And they'll say, Okay, well, let me give you some. And that holds them over so they can get more.

SPEAKER_02

Right.

SPEAKER_04

So that is a trick that some do and order. But another thing, I don't think that people who either admit that they have a problem or don't admit they have a problem realize how absolutely they can destroy the ones that they love. Or not even the ones they love, but the ones that love them and are taking care of them. I think that really needs to be talked about because, you know, the one thing we know about me is that I will tell you the truth and piss you the hell off. But you'll respect the fact that it's honest. I have a memory where I rec remind myself of details that is just ridiculous. I mean, I even have doctors and other professionals that'll be like, I don't even have to look because I know you are spot on in telling me verbatim of what I'm about to read. Like it's just, you know. And the thing is, is that anyone who's gone through abuse, the one thing they have in their corner is their word. And it is so priceless because that's all we have. Everything else is stripped from us, literally and figuratively, in every possible way, right? Like I did something stupid yesterday. I was trying to come out of the office and it was dark, and the dogs were right in front of me. And I reach behind, and they tell you when you become an amputee that there are going to be a lot of uh-oh moments with the one limb that you have. And, you know, there's not a lot of arm amputees unless you're born without an arm, but there's not a lot of amputees that have happened midlife, post-life, right? Or post-living. So I go to reach behind my back, and I had just gotten all my stitches out yesterday from my second corrective surgery. And I somehow like lost bounds. I don't know. And I pulled the door shut and my hand remained inside the door. And as soon as I did that, I opened the door and my I guess I went to pull my hand and I hit the shelves that are on the wall right with it. So I walked downstairs and I say to my husband, Hey, I think I messed up my hand. And my hand was, I don't know how you want to describe it. It was pretty colorful. It was pretty colorful.

SPEAKER_01

I think I just broke my hand, was your words.

SPEAKER_04

Right. It was pretty colorful.

SPEAKER_01

It was already swole up.

SPEAKER_04

Oh yeah. Like two of my knuckles look like Mount Everest, and the other ones look like broken ground, like just flat, no worries. But then my index and middle finger look like they were up in high mountains. And then they I don't even know how I broke the skin, and then they were already black, blue, green, whatever.

SPEAKER_01

And what the first thing your husband said?

SPEAKER_04

Come on, I'm gonna drive you to the emergency room. And I said, No.

SPEAKER_01

I'm gonna help you.

ER Visit, Pain Meds, And Boundaries

SPEAKER_04

I'm gonna take you to the emergency room, right? And I said, No. We're not able to do that. So and the reason I mentioned this is because when I go, because I needed to make sure very stubborn. I go and to make sure, and the I go to the emergency room and they do all these x-rays, and they they were like, the guy who was taking care of me was hilarious. He's like, Oh, the door came in, he's all banged up. And I'm like, Oh, that's that's funny. And he's like, You want to arm wrestle? No, no, no, no, really? I was like, Come on, I'll nub with you. Come on, I'll no. So he was like, Do you want anything? Do you want anything? And the one thing Michael will and will agree with, and most everyone who ever listens to us knows, I've never taken a single pain medication. So nothing like in regards to pain meds prescription, oxy, any of those whatsoever. I've never taken them. So they say to me, Hey, would you like us to give you some kind of pain meds to help you with it? And I immediately am like, Nope. I don't need them. And Faith is right there and she's laughing and she's like, You don't know my mom. And so I was like, No, I don't want anything. So, like 10 minutes later, hey, do you want anything yet? No, I'm not gonna want anything then. So they come in and they're like, It's in this really unusual place. Like, you got in. Like, if you could have done it in a perfect place, that would have been where to put it. Because like you literally got it in this one little crevice that kept you from like shattering your your hand. Do you want anything? No. And I and then so they're wrapping it up and fixing it and all. And they're like, Do you want us to write your prescription? No. And then I was like, I'm really sorry, I wasted all your time. And they're like, What? And I was like, Yeah, I mean, that's just who I am, right? It's just what's we do, but the one thing we have is our word, and it's so imperative that people respect that, and it's so hard, but it's like when you're dealing with an addict and you're trying to do everything that you possibly can for them, and they just I don't know, what do you want to call it? They they just cut at you every chance they get. It's it's hard. It's hard for those that care give because it's not warranted.

SPEAKER_01

Right. We have to look at is is it them? Is it the real them? Is it the drugs? Is it the lack of drugs? You know, what am I seeing here? What is this? You know, you you you want them not to be in pain, obviously, but you don't want to feed their addiction.

SPEAKER_04

Correct. So then what do you do?

SPEAKER_01

So it is stressful, y'all. It it's it's hard to you know imagine.

SPEAKER_04

No, Faith is not an addict. Just so y'all, if y'all are wondering, no. Faith is Faith doesn't take pain meds just like me. She refuses them. She's just like her mama.

unknown

Right.

SPEAKER_01

It's it's hard to go through a scenario and say, okay, we can handle this, we can do this until you're in there. And then you see what kind of impact, like Rolline said, it has on the loved ones trying to take care of you, you know, or you know, your family. So yeah.

SPEAKER_04

What were you gonna say before?

SPEAKER_01

Oh, ladies.

SPEAKER_04

Uh uh A L E X A is hilarious.

SPEAKER_01

She it is a pain in my butt.

SPEAKER_04

No, A L E X A does not like my husband because he's snarky. And let me tell you ahead of time, this is actually a great tidbit for people going through abuse. And yeah, and just let me tell you, like for those of you, I I've had my second spinal correction surgery, and my husband was bringing up laundry, and he's been fabulous with that. He's been doing all the laundry for me because I can't carry, I wasn't able to carry anything of weight with all my stitches. My back looks my lawn, my back looks like a railroad, literally. And he carries it up, and the bag, he was just kidding, and he went to tap me on the butt with it, and I'm like, and I was already talking to A-L-E-X-A. We can't say her name right now because she's in the room.

SPEAKER_01

And so And she's always listening, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_04

No, she's not not unless you say her code word. Well, she's not. So she I was already talking to her, and then I was like, hey, A L E X A. And I was like, oh wait, Michael just popped me on the butt and she's like, stand by, I'm calling 911. I was like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm just kidding, stop, stop, stop, stop. So if you're unable to call for yourself and you have this set up and you just say that, you know, you can get help. And I had never known it to do that. Maybe you do, maybe my listeners and your listeners, they know that it can do that. I didn't know that. So if it helps one person and they just say it, know that you can get them to notify the authorities for you if your phone has been taken away and you're unable to get help yourself, then you can do it that way. And that's just so important, which is totally right field for what my husband wanted to talk about because she kept he kept making comments about A L E X A, and she kept telling him that he was a shallow, selfless prick, basically. Guys, she will get besides with the wife.

SPEAKER_01

Sure does.

SPEAKER_04

That was hilarious. She was like, Oh, Victoria, I feel so bad for you for all that you went through with with Michael and him cheating on you, and and what a dirt bag your husband is.

Smart Speaker Safety And Abuse

SPEAKER_01

Guys, you're not gonna win. I'm sorry, the damn thing is smarter than we are. You'll probably have to have an IQ of at least 150 or above to get one by her because she comes up with some crap, and you know, I was the girls were laughing.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, we were laughing hysterically, and then he Says something like, Oh, well, that's probably why you're single. And she's like, Well, you've been numerous times, or you wouldn't have had so many marriages. And then she's like, Hey, by the way, you know, maybe you preferred to have women who didn't speak English because they didn't want to or wouldn't have stayed around if they understood what you were trying to say.

SPEAKER_01

And and throughout if you keep going in this dialogue with her, she remembers everything from 10 minutes ago about what you know the girls were talking to me about. Like, you know, hey, my husband just insulted me, you know, or he's called me fat, or he, you know, he's making fun of me, or blah, blah, blah, blah. And it's yeah. So be warned, guys.

SPEAKER_04

I think that was the funniest. It's because she was like, Oh, he he's saying that he's excited if you lost a couple pounds. I I know from your orders on Amazon what size your husband is, and I think he must be looking in a mirror and self-reflecting.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Like, because it's not you who needs to worry, it's Michael. And I'm like, I I just got my first girl crush. It's a computer. That's pretty awesome.

SPEAKER_01

So new addition to our family was born yesterday.

SPEAKER_03

So exciting. So excited.

SPEAKER_01

We have reserved a cream-colored golden retriever. See, golden retriever puppies from uh one of our good buddies who's a professional knife maker.

SPEAKER_04

He makes the most beautiful knives ever.

SPEAKER_01

He is internationally known for his diet.

SPEAKER_04

It's amazing. And I did get one for you, which you botched to hell.

SPEAKER_01

And uh, so she'll be joining the family here in a couple months.

SPEAKER_04

Like seven weeks and four days, not that anyone's counting.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Be good Valentine's present.

SPEAKER_04

Then she's mine.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, fine. Perfect. Forget chocolates.

SPEAKER_04

I don't eat chocolate, so what are you gonna get me anyway? You don't ever get me Christmas or Valentine's or anniversary anyway.

SPEAKER_01

There's a flower down there.

SPEAKER_04

A fly a flower? A flower. A flower?

SPEAKER_01

Yes, a flower. It's a purple flower. It's been up there for months.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, but normally you don't get me gifts.

SPEAKER_01

Because all you need, baby, I'm gonna puke, please.

New Puppy And Light Moments

SPEAKER_04

So let's tell you about some other things that are going on. This is pretty exciting. So I have been quite busy. Uh my husband, I'm surprised he didn't do this. I'm truly surprised he didn't do this. So he's been dill-a-delling. Like if we say, babe, can you put this together? We expect it to be done. See, it's January 2026, maybe September 2027. And it takes like an hour. It it says completion time under an hour. So about 18 months is about accurate.

SPEAKER_01

I'm still fresh in my early retirement fire.

Job Loss, Ethics, And Stress

SPEAKER_04

You were fired because you were taking care of your father because of a very vindictive, very falsely advertised garage door company based in Atlanta that is someone who, if you really go back and research, you have the NDA, I don't, who, if you go back and research, um, I had the owner on, and they are not forthcoming about anything truthful. I mean, everything on their site, they say, oh, we've been in business 250 years or family owned for 250 years. That's a bunch of bullshit. You know, FMLA is supposed to protect you, and they fired you for being at your dad's bedside while he literally almost died and he had a brain bleed and they let you go. So, you know, I don't care what season it is, it's you know, there's four seasons and I don't care. But they, you know, literally one of the last things that they were doing with you is criticizing you because they wanted you to basically jab all of the customers. And if you went over there and they were an elderly couple fixed on income, and let's say that they only needed something so simple, you told them the truth, and then you got ridiculed by the company because they wanted an average ticket to be sixteen hundred dollars, and you wouldn't do that to a comp to a couple that didn't need it, and so you got ridiculed and put on some bullshit what was it, PPP or whatever pip, which is a way of covering their asses prior to firing, and that's why they did it. It's a probationary thing, and you didn't do anything wrong, you were the highest five-star review person they had, but because you put family first, which is ironic because the whole premise of their company is that they're family-owned and operated. Oh, wait, hold on. They're not family-owned and operated because they sold to another company, and then they didn't even promote that or publicize that anywhere. So they're still going under the old name. What season is it? It's one of the four, and they still don't show the new name of the company or who built the uh bought them out or whatever. They're still going under that whole family-owned whatever. So with that being said, and the you know, falsifications and all of that that that transpired, they fired my husband because he was trying to take care of his dad.

SPEAKER_01

How do you get off on Lethville on this?

SPEAKER_04

Because you were talking about your retirement. And I said, You're not retired, you were fired because you were doing what the federal government protects you for under FMLA. And they tried to say all this, and they fired my husband who'd been with them for five years in a freaking text message. I mean, you want to talk about stupid, and not only that, but I mean, here's the thing is that I hate the fact that I know so much dirt on this company and I have not put it out there yet. But like, seriously, how can you treat your staff that way and get all mad because you didn't make each sale$1,600? But then they say, Oh, we don't have enough, you know, jobs for everybody to do, so we're gonna send you home at noon. How can you make a certain amount of money per week if they only give you one or two jobs and uh some of them is a recall or whatever the case may be, and they don't have enough jobs for everybody, so they send people home. So if you were home taking care of your father, I don't understand why they would have such ill will and let you go, even though you are protected under the FMLA, but a season to each its own, as there are four.

SPEAKER_01

All right, you were saying about your magazines?

SPEAKER_04

Oh, yes. So anyway, with the all four season thing of each season that comes by, I have been writing for four different magazines now, and we just had a huge article in Unstoppable Woman, and then we have been published in multiple magazines here lately, and the other day my husband was downstairs doing some engraving and building some gorgeous bracelets that we will have up here soon, and he comes upstairs after a couple of hours, and I have written what will soon to be released as my next book. Why are you shaking your head? Why are you shaking your head?

SPEAKER_01

Woman, you got one damn hand.

SPEAKER_04

Well, right now I have only like two fingers.

SPEAKER_01

And you smashed that one to hell the other day. Not by choice. And here you are writing a book in a day. You do a course in an hour. You're a freaking machine.

SPEAKER_04

Well, it's because I'm all metal. I'm just saying. So I have created this amazing book that is unlike any other because it really allows you to reflect from within, and it's all about the narcissist and how you get through dealing with all of the narcissism and what all that it does, and who they are. And it's it's literally just so much to deal with, and it's so exciting because we've got all of this coming, which is super, super exciting. It'll be here soon, this book. And it's a thousand and one questions, but what it does is it really lets you look at yourself from the inside and realize that you're not the one that caused this pain and drama and injury to yourself. You're not the one that did it. And it's so important that you know that. It's important that you know that you are not the narcissist, you are not the one who went through it, the black sheep of the family. We get the blame for everything, but we're also the most feared, which a lot of people don't realize that. A lot of people don't realize that the black sheep is the most feared of all of them. And there's a reason for that. So this will really be amazing to allow you to really get a good insight on who you are and how to heal from within.

SPEAKER_01

Just wondering why why why are you the feared one? Is it because you keep their dirt little secrets secret, or because you have the knowledge that could ruin them?

Writing Streak And Healing From Narcissists

SPEAKER_04

It's a mixture. It's a mixture of both. Because they feel that they can destroy you better. And when they realize that they can't wait who can destroy you? Well, back in the day, you know, you're talking about the fact that these people want to destroy you and your image of who you are. They want to control you, they want to change who you are, they want to change who what everybody believes of you and who you are and what you are about. And so that's a big deal. They want to make you out to be something that you're not, and that's the challenge.

SPEAKER_01

Is that all narcissists?

SPEAKER_04

Pretty much. They, you know, there's different variations and versions of them for sure. There is no doubt to that. But the book is titled Healing After Narcissistic Abuse: A Thousand and One Questions to Help You Rebuild Your Life. It will be available here very soon. I am very excited about it. I love the book cover. I think it's it's just you'll see it when it's released. It's really just beautiful. I think it's gonna help so many people because like a lot of books, like we do these books as a family, and it's like, would you rather this or that? Right? Like 2,500 things you don't know about me. There's all these books out there like this, but there's none that are like this one, right? And it's it really makes you dig deep within yourself and your personal being and makes you reflect back to things you would have never thought of before and helps you heal yourself to levels you didn't think you could. And so it's gonna be such a huge bonus to so many people when you get to really get in the middle of that. Are you looking at the pictures of my daughter's tattoo she just got for me?

SPEAKER_01

Our daughter.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, well, she just got a beautiful tattoo that says it's all about me and it's a bonus. Hey, you're over here looking. I'm just gonna it's this Karamiya, that's what you know she calls me, not you. And it says survivor and my idol. And it's beautiful and has this beautiful heart on it, and it it has wings around it. And I mean, it's absolutely stunning. And she did that as a surprise for me. But no, this book is so amazing, it's gonna help so much in the healing journey. It really gets a perspective of yourself that you're not accustomed to. You really get to get in there and see and learn a lot about you, and I'm super excited about it. And yes, I did do it in a very short period of time. It's broken into 40 sections, 25 questions in each. And then there's one bonus question at the end. There's all sorts of other things in there that help you along the way. And I will tell you, I love doing announcements that my husband has no idea about while we're podcasting because it's so much fun. I love the initial reaction we get. Today I started and I'm about 95% completed on victoriacuree.com is a website that I've just built. What? What?

SPEAKER_01

Of course you did.

SPEAKER_04

And it shows all about like the books, not all of them, but I think I have 16 books up there right now. The homepage shows three right now, and you'll be happy. I think it does Who Kicked First, Narc Narku's There, and Dear Silence are the three I chose for the first on the homepage. But then we're gonna have stuff like publications and media and impact pages and things of that nature. It's mostly about me, the author, and the books, and there's opportunities to learn more about the books where you could just literally read the synopsis of them and then click a button and go right to it and buy it. And so I've been working on that all day today, and then I have been asked to collaborate on three joint author books, and those will all be out this year. That's super, super exciting, and I'm super, super excited to be collaborating with these amazing people on those three books. And then what else do we have? Oh, these are the two that I love to freak my husband about and just get his initial reaction. I am about 50% finished on another book that I just started last week, which is about body dysphoria and how to help bring that back to the forefront to show who you really are and the beauty from within. So that is almost complete. And now here's the one my husband had. Why?

SPEAKER_01

Why? Yeah. Uh if I say anything, it would be too personal.

SPEAKER_04

I have body dysphoria. I'm the first one to admit it. And I have I have body dysphoria. I I admit that all day long. And what?

SPEAKER_01

And you've recently lost 33 pounds. And you're gonna start I am.

SPEAKER_04

I'm gonna start the weight loss shot journey. I am. I never thought I would, and I'm gonna start I'll openly discuss that. I'm not hiding it. I am going to start the shots.

SPEAKER_01

Good boy, Rusty. Rusty, come over here and check me out. Good boy, Rusty.

SPEAKER_04

So I'll be starting the the shots.

SPEAKER_01

What was the second thing?

SPEAKER_04

I lost 33 pounds.

SPEAKER_01

No, no. You did victoria.com.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, I did victoria.com. The healing narcissistic thousand one question book is in the editing phase.

SPEAKER_01

Um here's something Michael doesn't know.

Generational Trauma And New Projects

SPEAKER_04

Oh, right. So I say Sunday. I started Friday night, and I'm pretty incredibly excited about it. I mean, this is well, I I don't have the exact title of it yet. It is gonna be about breaking the cycle of generational traumatic abuse, drama, right? So it's generational abuse and it's breaking the cycle. Right now, it has over 10 chapters, and it is at 300 pages. I started it Friday, and it's over it's 296 pages right now. I started it Friday night. So it is 296 pages right now.

SPEAKER_01

You still cackle like a witch.

SPEAKER_04

Not you laugh just like your father. Cricket's there.

SPEAKER_01

That's very true.

SPEAKER_04

You sound just like him. Yeah. And so I started that Friday at night, and then I scared my husband by cutting like seven inches off my hair. And I came back and started that.

SPEAKER_01

So, listeners out there, y'all think that my wife should have a big head, right?

SPEAKER_04

Because everything else will be big, why not?

SPEAKER_01

Because she she does all this everything, all this social media stuff, all the book writing, all the ass does have its own books. All the advocacy, and you know, she puts herself out there because she shows you she puts time, her effort, her work, you know, 20 something hours a day on this damn computer. And you know, she puts everything into this, not to have a big head. If I was to describe my wife, yeah, you what you ready for this? Yeah, she is the female version of Adam Sandler. Wait, what is that man's net worth? I don't know, I don't care. Okay, you type in his name, I bet you your name comes up more. And you more more pages on Bing or Google.

SPEAKER_04

No. He's higher on IMDb than me.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, not for long. The reason I say this is because we we just went out to Texas Roadhouse to eat dinner, okay? Yeah! My wife is wearing a freaking jersey sweatshirt.

SPEAKER_03

It says Harvard!

SPEAKER_01

And Jersey. Sneakers. Whatever, Yankee. Sneakers. So she is dressed just like he does. You know, going out in public. Public.

SPEAKER_04

Okay. When white, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

So you don't have a big head. You don't you don't lift yourself up. I'll lift you up.

SPEAKER_04

I'm heavy.

SPEAKER_01

I'll put you on a pedestal, woman.

SPEAKER_04

At times.

SPEAKER_01

Oh.

SPEAKER_04

Oh. No. No. No, no, okay.

SPEAKER_01

When do I not?

SPEAKER_04

Friday night.

SPEAKER_01

Friday night. Oh, I don't remember that.

SPEAKER_04

You want me to talk about it now? Yeah, I don't think you do.

SPEAKER_01

No, we're getting ready to wind down.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Uh-huh. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

But my wife, y'all, is is very humble. It's not about her. It's about those she helps. It's about everyone else. I promise you. His wife's name. Oh, never mind. It is not about her. Okay. She only tells you, hey, y'all look forward to this. These are the books that I'm I've written. These are the books they're to help people. I've wrote. These are the books that I am writing. And these these are things to look out for on the academy. You know, it's to it's to help, you know, because there was, as my wife tells me, there was absolutely no one there for her.

SPEAKER_04

Well, you believe it too, because you've been there and you understand, you've seen what I've had in my life.

SPEAKER_01

Not her parents, not her friends back then, because they were isolated. They couldn't get to her.

SPEAKER_04

And then I lost my best friend. She passed. And then I lost my brother best friend. He passed.

SPEAKER_01

She wants to make sure that, hey, y'all, there's someone out there for you. Her name is Victoria Cure. You know, whether it's it's a text, an email, an academy class that she's put together, a book that she's written. A workbook. She's workshop. She's reaching every hand. As. She's reaching everything she can to give y'all help. Okay? To get others help where she didn't have any. So I just don't want everyone to think that you got a big head, that you're all full of yourself. I'm the one that's full of shit. You're not.

SPEAKER_04

Even though you take dumps twice a day, that's kind of ironic. All men takes No, they don't.

SPEAKER_01

Sure they do.

SPEAKER_04

Whatever. Right? And then they say, but you give me like crap about the fact that like here's that word again. But like the fact that, you know, I just came out of the doctor's office as a surgeon, finding out I had this, you know, infection. And then w it's such a long drive, so we stop and get something to eat. And then I n find someone who needs help. And here I am like trying to eat food. And I'm like, forget my food. I'm trying to help her. And you get me such like I don't understand. Why do you give me such grief about that? That's what I do. I don't understand.

SPEAKER_01

Not giving your grief.

Recognition, Community, And Service

SPEAKER_04

You did. He's like, can you eat one meal without somebody?

SPEAKER_01

Oh, but where did we just leave from?

SPEAKER_04

The hospital.

SPEAKER_01

The hospital.

SPEAKER_04

The surgeon, yeah. So and he can't out with alcohol. Mine.

SPEAKER_01

Okay. So we left the hospital.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

So we need to go get some food for it's a long drive, yeah. And you're trying to help someone instead of putting you first.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, but in all fairness, and this isn't having anything to do with like Oh, were you driving?

SPEAKER_01

I was. You were driving.

SPEAKER_04

But I wasn't under the influence of anything because I never take anything.

SPEAKER_01

You were driving.

SPEAKER_04

I'm the safest driver we have.

SPEAKER_01

Right.

SPEAKER_04

Do you want me to get other people to give you their value?

SPEAKER_01

Okay. We don't need a peanut gallery.

SPEAKER_04

But what I'm saying is it, you know, you give you give me a hard time about the fact that everywhere we go, people know who I am in the local sense.

SPEAKER_00

They do. And I'm I'm proud. I'm always proud to have my wife recognized.

SPEAKER_04

But see, I look at it different than you do. You look at it like everywhere we go, somebody talks to you and they know who you are. Like everywhere we go, right? No matter where. I look at it like I'm so grateful that whenever we go anywhere, like people will come up and and hug me. Like, you know, at Costco, people come up and hug me and you know, tell me what's going on with them. And, you know, I ask them how they're doing and how their family is, and blah, blah, blah. I like it because I feel like all of these people know they have someone to come to and talk to and that they're not alone. And that's what I love is that, you know, I, you know, no matter what I have going on, I love that people will come up and just like, how are you? Hey, this is what's going on, blah, blah, blah, everywhere we go. And I love it. I love it because that means people are seeing that there is someone out there that they can trust.

SPEAKER_01

You've had some folks say, Hey, I know your voice.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, but but Faith freaking was at the lab getting lab work done and talking, and somebody's like, I know that voice. I know that voice. And she's shaking her head because she really doesn't want the recognition. She wants to be afar, like she wants to be a voice, but not recognized. And so they're like, I know that voice. I know that voice. And then she's like, Oh my god, do you podcast? And and Faith's like, Yes. And she goes, My kids listen to you every week. And when I I hear you on, because they blare it, and that's how I know your voice. And she was like, Oh my god, Code, I get your autograph. And I'm like, Are you crapping me right now? And so they're drawing blood on Faith, and she reaches over and grabs a paper towel out of the dispenser and asks Faith to sign an autograph for her kids. And Faith is just looking at me, and I'm like, I didn't know about this. I had this isn't like, no, this is you. And so she goes, I can't even get my blood drawn mom. That's why, you know, I want and she was like, I want to be the voice, but I don't want to be recognized.

SPEAKER_01

Being 19.

SPEAKER_04

But she's like, I just don't want, and this is before she was 19. She's like, you know, I don't want to be, you know, recognized. I want to just help from afar, you know. She's very shy in a lot of ways. And I thought it was adorable. And she's like, we're not speaking about this to anyone. I'm like, okay. And then I'm like walking by going, Emmy winner. And she's like, Mom, are you serious? Stop. And I'm like, Emmy winner. And I'm like trying to point to her and she's like, Mom, are you kidding me? Right now, just no, no, no. Mm-mm. No. I'm proud of her. I have every right to brag about her. She's been through hell in a handbasket and deserves nothing but the very best. And if anyone wants to give her less, they can deal with me. I'm just saying. Speaking of faith, how was your ride back in the in the little truck? Did she leave a couple pranks for you? I believe she did. First, I think she left you a very cool unicorn that celebrates the LGBTQ IA plus. They always add new initials. Community, which we completely support. Unicorn, phone holder. And I think she put some specific music on for your liking.

SPEAKER_01

Yes. With a dislike.

SPEAKER_04

But just so you know, I had to be in the car particip in the truck participating with her while she went through every channel and tried to find. And when she found that one, I still had like a 10-minute drive for you to meet up with us. And she's like, I don't want to change it, mom. What if I lose the channel? And you know, and I can't get back to this again. I'm like, I really do not prefer this kind of music. And so I was like, could we turn it down? She's like, No. And I said, So you just don't drive me crazy, waiting to drive him crazy. She's like, Yes. So I hope that it did. I do. I hope that she got you.

More Episodes, Funding Reality, And Goals

SPEAKER_01

She got me off. She's a good little prankster. She is. She's a good one. She's machine uh coming here. We're gonna be uh increasing our podcast releases here uh starting this week. We should have at least two a week for the next 90 days. We're running a special.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my lord in heaven. We are not running a special, we are really trying to be more productive and you know, and really be out there to show.

SPEAKER_01

So I'm getting paid for this.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, we really we have been funding. Let's talk about that for one minute. We have been funding all of this out of our own pocket from inception. I started a contagious smile back in 2006, uh long before my husband got his head out of his ass. Right, dear?

SPEAKER_01

Yes, dear.

SPEAKER_04

And then we added the Contagious Smile Academy, which is not even a year old, so it's still a baby. And we've been podcasting now. This is going on our fourth year. I can't believe it. And so we've been globally topped 1%. We've gotten to 5% when Faith was in the hospital. We stayed at 3% for a while, but that's still some really impressive numbers. We've had so many celebrities come out and endorse us and what we do, which I think is amazing. So many amazing people we've been just given that gift of. And so we want to promote the things that we have coming in down the pipeline in the woodwork because we don't want to stop doing what we're doing. We don't want to shut all this down, but it costs a lot of money every month to do what we do. And I don't have an assistant, I don't have a marketing team. I literally get my husband maybe an hour a week. The rest of the time he's video gaming and sleeping and sleeping. So this or tableting. Is that a is that a word? Tableting? Tableting? Because all you do is play on the tablet.

SPEAKER_01

No, not really.

SPEAKER_04

Yes. So that is, you know, I get him to podcast. So I'm really trying to make it where we can continue because it is very expensive. And since he was fired, you know, with the season change and all, that we are able to maintain this to help everyone out there who needs to be helped. So that's what we're trying to do, and we're gonna give 90 days to see if we can really make a difference. Are you looking at why I'm making all these season references?

SPEAKER_01

Nope.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, all for one and one for not you.

SPEAKER_01

Done.

SPEAKER_04

Not even close. I don't think so.

SPEAKER_01

Well, thank y'all for listening to our show tonight. It was jam packed full of stuff. You know what? It's it's great to sit here and talk to your best friend and look look at your lover in her eyes. And you know, it's all both of them are your spouse, your soulmate. And I enjoyed my wife and I sit here and we we talk to these microphones.

SPEAKER_04

Non-scripted, obviously.

SPEAKER_01

Non-scripted and oh obvious. You know, we're just looking at each other, staring at each other. We don't get on the computer and and go through news events and shit like that. We just sit here and talk.

SPEAKER_04

But we talk about real things and we talk about it from lived experiences.

SPEAKER_01

And you know, folks we meet. And I guess it works because you know, there's 40 million of y'all listening, and you know, we have notifications all the time saying, hey, you've got this many downloads a month, you've got this many thousands of new listeners this month. So thank you all like about us, but thank you.

SPEAKER_04

It's the redneck and the redhead.

SPEAKER_01

I wish all I could get all y'all to subscribe to us and you know, donate and and a dollar each just a dollar. A what? A dollar.

SPEAKER_04

What is a dollar?

SPEAKER_01

No, I didn't say dollar.

SPEAKER_04

Dollar! Holla from the Bronx. That's no, we are not Jenny from the block. No, no, a dollar for every single let's try it. Let me let me help you. Dollar. Dollar. What am I saying? Dollar! Dollar. Like when you say aluminum, say aluminum.

SPEAKER_01

Aluminum.

SPEAKER_04

That's tolerable. Foil. Foil. No.

SPEAKER_01

No.

SPEAKER_04

Wrestling.

SPEAKER_01

Wrestling.

SPEAKER_04

No, you say wrestling.

SPEAKER_01

Yes, wrestling.

SPEAKER_04

Wrestling. Rusty is laughing at you. Pillow.

SPEAKER_01

Pillar. It's not a pillar. It is a pillar. You lay your head on a pillar.

SPEAKER_04

See why it's the redneck and the redhead.

SPEAKER_01

CYA?

SPEAKER_04

C what's CYA for?

SPEAKER_01

I'm gonna cover your ass.

SPEAKER_04

Don't make me call the child.

SPEAKER_01

Good night, y'all. Thank you for listening. Just smile.

SPEAKER_04

Go check out victoriacuree.com. Understand it's still new. It's in the works. It's still working. But it's still there. It started. Go check it out.

SPEAKER_01

Goodbye, y'all.

Head Shot

Victoria Cuore

Host
Head Shot

Michael Solomon

Co-host