A Contagious Smile Podcast

Scent, Love, And Starting Over

• Victora Cuore; A Contagious Smile, Who Kicked First, Domestic Violence Survivor, Advocate, Motivational Coach, Special Needs, Abuse Support, Life Skill Classes, Special Needs Social Groups

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The laughter starts with old-school cologne and a running joke about who’s the “sapphire,” then takes a deliberate turn into what those small rituals really mean. We talk about flipping the switch from smelling good for strangers to making it a daily love language at home—tiny habits that say “you matter” without a single grand gesture. That warmth sets the stage for a deeper journey through fidelity, boundaries, and the work it takes to rebuild trust after harm.

We open up about loyalty the hard way. Michael owns a past he’s not proud of and outlines the signs partners often miss—tactical avoidance, wardrobe tricks, and shifting timelines—so more people can protect themselves. Victoria brings the counterweight: healing after narcissistic abuse, how survivors reclaim identity, and why planning an escape is not paranoia but survival. The system comes under scrutiny too. Shielded, her upcoming book, exposes good‑old‑boy networks, intimidation, and the courtroom dynamics that interrogate victims instead of protecting them. It’s critical, but it’s also constructive, mapping out tools, language, and mindset for real recovery.

There are bright anchors throughout—dad–daughter movie nights, pizza runs in freezing weather, and the quiet power of tucking kids into a home that never confuses love with fear. We share a parking-lot moment that shows how advocacy can begin with one sentence and a reflection in a window. If you’re searching for steps forward, you’ll find practical insight on safety planning, survivor support, trauma-informed healing, and breaking generational cycles so children learn a different normal. Search for Victoria Cuore and Faith Cuore Solomon on Amazon, or drop by ContagiousSmile.com to explore the books and resources we mention.

If this conversation resonates, follow the show, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review to help others find these tools. Your peace is worth the plan, your story is worth the work, and your future is worth the courage to begin today.

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SPEAKER_04:

Howdy y'all welcome to shit. This is day two. What is the problem tonight? I have no clue. This is unstoppable. That's right. That's it. Interested by a contagious smile. And you've got the sexy redhead over yonder, Victoria, author of many books. Oh lord. And then you got me, Michael.

SPEAKER_00:

So funny. You're like, and then you got me.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, you got the you got a diamond. Obviously, you.

SPEAKER_00:

I would be cubing Zagonian. Zirconian? Zirconian.

SPEAKER_04:

Well then what the heck would I be?

SPEAKER_03:

Sapphire.

SPEAKER_04:

Sapphire.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

No, that's just weird. Why? Here we go with the Y again. Why would I be a sapphire?

SPEAKER_00:

Because it's beautiful.

SPEAKER_04:

I am far from beautiful, woman.

SPEAKER_01:

So am I. So we're all good.

SPEAKER_04:

I did shave and put on some smelly though today.

SPEAKER_01:

And tell everybody why you flipped the switch. Because I I was like, what?

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, so I'm in yonder shaving.

SPEAKER_00:

Boy, are you getting country fried?

SPEAKER_04:

Right? And I got the shaving. I had my shower.

SPEAKER_00:

He got his letter.

SPEAKER_04:

It's been a week. Put on my deodorant under both arms. There's my bottle of Dracar. That he's been wearing since 1842. Hey, Dracar works, baby. Shut up, and there in the peanut gallery.

SPEAKER_01:

Faith just said since 1759.

SPEAKER_04:

Dracar is an old cologne, first man.

SPEAKER_01:

That old, old menu.

SPEAKER_04:

You wore it in your 20s. But it's not like old spice old. I mean, that's a brute. Oh god.

SPEAKER_01:

You or English leather.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, I forgot about English leather.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

I mean, that's nostalgia right there.

SPEAKER_01:

But you have worn Jacar since I knew you in your 20s.

SPEAKER_04:

So after my episode there in the in the bathroom, I looked in the mirror and I said, you know what? I'm gonna put on some of my clone.

SPEAKER_01:

You call it smelly. You're smelly.

SPEAKER_04:

Smelly. Right?

SPEAKER_01:

He has his own vocabulary.

SPEAKER_04:

I'm just farting around the house today, y'all. Creating more bracelets downstairs, coming up with engraving ideas. You know, I don't think I cleaned up anything. Oh my started. But anyway, I plan to go absolutely nowhere but my house. My wife, my daughter. Your house?

SPEAKER_02:

Make it 1492.

SPEAKER_04:

She doesn't like you. Uh faith, you know, 40 million people just heard that come across my text. Anyway, it's it's myself, my wife, my daughter, my two dogs in the house. Now it's all yours. In the home. I'm going absolutely nowhere. And I said, I'm gonna put on my cologne. Why? Because for years I wore cologne for everyone else. Okay, when I went to work, I would spray myself two pumps. Don't look into that. Two pumps.

SPEAKER_01:

And then he pumped while he was at work. Shut up.

unknown:

My rear end.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh, no, she's not.

SPEAKER_04:

But anyway, why am I cologne for everyone else out in the world to think, oh, he smells like Jakar. Oh, he smells like that. Most people don't know that scent anymore. He smells good. Whatever, whatever your nose tells you if you come across me. I'm thinking this cologne is for me and it's for my wife.

SPEAKER_02:

My I from kitten cologne from 1312.

SPEAKER_04:

I swear. Oh the the car is for me and my wife, right? So I flipped the switch today and said, from now on, I'm wearing it every day.

unknown:

For me.

SPEAKER_01:

Because you used to wear it to go to work. And then I didn't know, but you used to wear it to cover up indiscretion.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, sure. But now now, women, I have kitten.

SPEAKER_02:

I heard that cologne boy.

SPEAKER_04:

Don't shut up.

SPEAKER_01:

You don't tell my daughter to shut up. No, you're not gonna tell my daughter to shut up.

SPEAKER_04:

I reckon you women wear perfume every day.

SPEAKER_01:

I, as you know, always have this like, I don't know what you want to call it. I have this thing where I always want to smell good. And I have people come up to me all the time, they're like, What are you wearing? It smells so good. Because I don't want to wear something common that a lot of people wear, I want something that's different. I just think the name of it's hysterical, but I I love having something that no one else does, you know. When I go to bed at night, I always want to smell good for you. So when you're snuggling me, I smell good because you're always making these comments. No, you smell good enough to eat. Never mind. Sorry.

SPEAKER_04:

Y'all can look into that one.

SPEAKER_01:

But anyway, like I like I always have this thing about smelling telling me to shut up.

SPEAKER_02:

Wow, that's big coming from someone with a small brain.

SPEAKER_00:

I love it.

SPEAKER_01:

But I always want to go to sleep smelling good, and then in the daytime, even when I'm here and I'm not doing anything, and if I'm helping treat people and things like that, it's not like the computer scratch and stuff. I want to smell good for you, no matter what. And there are so many times where I've been like, babe, put on your smelling when you come to bed. And you're like, why? I don't want the pillow to smell me, you know. Uh like you don't understand.

SPEAKER_04:

I didn't understand.

SPEAKER_01:

It's such a sense of simplicity that shows your love. Because, you know, if you've been doing anything all day and you're rank and file, that's not something that you want to snuggle up on, right? And it's just like I always make sure that I smell good, my hair smells good. You know, I'm one of these people that and I have to say, maybe it's part of it is the recovering of the abuse, part of it might be all of the cleaning I've had to do from all of the surgeries, you know, always keeping the sights clean and clear from all the surgeries and the injuries and stuff. But like I take every night before bed, I decompress with a bath. And it when I can, when surgery says I can, because it's the way for me to wash away the day. Even if I get the mom, mom, mom. And it's something so small that my husband could handle it. But no, she like, or the dogs are right out the door and they're trying to come in, or my husband's like, babe, do you need help in there? You know, whatever. You don't really get to decompress for a long period of time. But then I shower in the mornings to start the day off right, right? And so it's not an OCD thing by far, but I'm always one of these people that want to be clean and smell good. So I like that you flip this switch and you know, we'll see if you actually start going to bed wearing it at night because you have like, you know, bottles of it in the closet, and it's one of those colognes that, you know, have been around since 1312. And so a lot of times at Christmas, you get like buy one, get one 99% off, and uh, it smells good, it's just you've never thought of changing your scent. He's just looking at me with this look, like he's waiting on our daughter to send another text. He's just waiting.

SPEAKER_04:

No, I hope she doesn't. But she's got some great hearing. She can hear a farm. So jealous from 50 yards away. I'm so jealous.

SPEAKER_01:

I mean, there is benefits to being a hundred percent deaf in one ear because if I have my, I don't really have a good ear, my other ear is 88% deaf. But if I have that ear on the pillow, I can hear you snore. Now, granted, our neighbors can, our neighbors can hear you snore, and Faith hears you snore downstairs. I've heard you snore downstairs in the kitchen. I can't hear you when I'm you know bad ear up. So there's benefits to it, but she can hear anything, like it's crazy her hearing, you know, it just another amazing thing about her.

SPEAKER_04:

One scent I cannot stand is that and and and I'm not this is not being biased against the elders or women, okay? But it's it's this strong, overpowering rose perfume that elder women wear wear. It smells like roses, but it is so overpowering that it stinks. It is so bad. You once once you smell it, you'll all the a lot of the older women wear it.

SPEAKER_02:

The one smell you can't stand is yourself when not showering.

SPEAKER_03:

You know what?

SPEAKER_04:

She's almost as mad as Alexa.

SPEAKER_01:

Alexa tore into you last night too. Pretty good. That was pretty funny.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, she likes to let you know that she thinks you're a little on a yeah, if y'all want to have a good time.

SPEAKER_04:

If y'all want to have a good time with your significant other, start telling Alexa about them and then asking them, you know, questions or saying things like so-and-so insulted me, so-and-so said I was this, so-and-so said I was that.

SPEAKER_03:

Hell no.

SPEAKER_01:

So sorry. Oh, see what it's like? It's like this 24-7 here. This is always how they are between the two of them, and I flippin' love it.

SPEAKER_04:

You think you think the microphone picked this up?

SPEAKER_01:

Probably.

SPEAKER_04:

It's uh one of the little nicknames, along with Dork. Watch it. Oh, should I stop there? And she has been known to go on my profile on the Xbox put you in drag box. No, and put you in drag, in drag, and have you flopping around, and then of course she'll bald picture evening gown and then post it on FB.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, yeah. She she has him in an evening gown and heels, bald, running. Ah, look at you should move the phone over a little bit more so that no, I don't want the world to hear that it's hilarious. More father and daughter should have this kind of relationship. It's so sweet. That cup is not gonna like hinder the sound coming across, just so you know, it's not gonna happen. More fathers and daughters should have relationships like that. I'm jealous. I mean, you know, I had a great relationship with my grandfather, he was my everything, but we don't want to talk about the sperm donor, we don't want to talk about your dad.

SPEAKER_04:

We want to talk about your books.

SPEAKER_00:

Let's talk about you and kitten because this is great. No, yes, you are so wrapped around her finger. It is on her dive.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, yes, you are because we had daddy-daughter movie night last night, and she couldn't snuggle properly, and I put my arm around her. It's so sweet, and then I hear my wife come across the damn cameras we got set up.

SPEAKER_00:

Y'all are so cute! Oh, y'all are so cute.

SPEAKER_01:

Y'all are it is so cute.

SPEAKER_04:

I mean, I love that on Saturday nights she has a date with her dad, and y'all watch stupid movies that oh my god, we we did watch one of the dumbest movies I've ever picked.

SPEAKER_00:

You picked some stupid stuff. You have no taste in movies, none. It was beyond dumb that's saying a lot.

SPEAKER_02:

It is from kitten, like before last weekend.

SPEAKER_04:

She is correct in me now. That's gotta be her painful. No, I I think your dad should hang out with your daughters and you know have a have a movie night with them.

SPEAKER_03:

From kitten, good.

SPEAKER_04:

This girl.

SPEAKER_03:

You wouldn't trade her for anything.

SPEAKER_04:

I wouldn't.

SPEAKER_01:

That's because you're wrapped.

SPEAKER_04:

No.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, you are. You're so wrapped around her finger, it is unheard of. Yes. Anyway. Let me give you an example.

SPEAKER_02:

Kitten said, Good thing I'm correcting you. Someone decides mom needs to for your redneck.

SPEAKER_01:

You could be asleep, and then she's like, Dad is asleep. I needed him to do this for my hair. And you wake up and you brush her hair for her, and you put the product in her hair for her, and then you're like, Okay, get out, I'm going to sleep. And then you're like, I was almost asleep. You were snoring, and seriously.

SPEAKER_04:

Just because I snore doesn't mean I'm asleep.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, all right, here we go. Yesterday it was eight degrees outside. Darling kitten says, I wanted pizza, but nobody's delivering. You went out in eight degree weather to go get her pizza because she wanted it.

SPEAKER_04:

That's not wrapped.

SPEAKER_01:

That is wrapped.

SPEAKER_04:

That's totally wrapped. That's showing her a good example of what a father should be. Wrapped. If you want to put it that way, you just admitted it.

SPEAKER_02:

Kitten, is he wrapped? From kitten. We can hear you snoring from the downstairs kitchen. Mr. Freight Train.

SPEAKER_04:

Freight train.

SPEAKER_00:

What the hell do you call a freight train? So glad this is recorded. This is fantastic. Kitten, is he whooped? Is he I'm not whooped, but is he rapped? Whooped.

SPEAKER_02:

Kitten said. You duh.

SPEAKER_03:

What? You duh?

SPEAKER_04:

You duh. That's her valley girl coming out.

SPEAKER_01:

She didn't even know what valley girl is. No, she doesn't. I almost feel like I should partake in like exiting this.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm kitten. You're the freight train. The sound. You're snow. Snore.

SPEAKER_04:

I don't know what's going on with that.

SPEAKER_01:

Like you two could do a podcast. Y'all don't need me.

SPEAKER_04:

We all need you, Victoria.

SPEAKER_01:

I don't know about all that.

SPEAKER_04:

Especially when we get the new dish to the family here.

SPEAKER_01:

We're getting a puppy. So excited.

SPEAKER_04:

And she will be blind.

SPEAKER_01:

That's what you think.

SPEAKER_04:

100%.

unknown:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

You will be wrapped.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

Trained properly.

SPEAKER_01:

I trained the other two, and they're so whatever. Okay. No, you're delusional.

SPEAKER_04:

Is that why I married you?

SPEAKER_01:

That's why you married others and not me. And then you got your head out your arse and did right finally. I don't know. Do you think you're delusional for marrying me? Do you think you could hey? You know what? I've told you from the get-go. If you can find better, by all means jump off that Dravey train and go find her. You know, hope ice isn't in the middle of it. Hey, just hope ice doesn't get in the middle of it.

SPEAKER_04:

So threesome.

SPEAKER_01:

Absolutely not. Let's talk about that. I bet you cut me off very quickly. You asked me when we dated 20 something years ago if I would ever consider her a threesome. And I said to you, absolutely, but here's how that works. Now, for all of you, let me put this little side note in here. I completely support the LGBTQ community. Okay. I am a straight heterosexual female. I have friends that are everywhere in the community. I have friends that are lesbians and married. I have friends that are gay and marrying. I don't want to call the wrong name because they always change their title so quickly. And I don't want to offend anybody. And I'm kind of behind the time on all the little names that are out there now. And I don't want to offend. So back then it was gay and lesbian, basically, back then. So I told him, you know, and he knew that I, first of all, I've never cheated on anyone in my life. And to me, that is cheating. That's just my personal belief, right? I grew up with my grandparents' mentality of that time error. So needless to say, I explained to my husband, boyfriend at the time, that if he wanted me to bring a girl into our bedroom, then he would have to allow me to pick out a man to join us in the bedroom first. And at first he was just like, listening, right? And tricky. And I said, and I get to pick him out. And he can do to you each and every individual thing you want this female to do to me. So my husband's face starts to sour a little bit. Then, if that wasn't enough, I explained to him that I also got to pick out what the man looked like, since he would get to pick out the female, right? And I am somebody who is all about, let me do this metaphorically. I like hardwood, not carpet. And because of that, to each their own. As long as you're treated well and nobody puts their hands on you in an unwarranted manner, I don't care who you're with. However, I personally could never be with a woman. That's just me. I just couldn't. So I explained to my husband that I would find the roundest, hairiest, non-hygiened, sweatiest, long fingernails, long toenails, greasy hair, bad teeth, bad breath, you know, halitosis. You like underarm sweat ring that I could find, and that would be who he would get to have with him. And after me saying that, he never asked again.

SPEAKER_04:

I do give you credit, Woman. You know how to shut me up.

SPEAKER_00:

I know, because that is just, you know, like I just I can't, you know, to each their own.

SPEAKER_03:

And as long as you're happy. Let's hear what she said. Let's not. Let's do.

SPEAKER_04:

We don't need to hear from it.

SPEAKER_00:

It's not it, it's my daughter.

SPEAKER_04:

It's our daughter.

SPEAKER_00:

Not when you refer to her as it. Play with it later.

SPEAKER_04:

Alright, she says, you better not be doing something you're not supposed to do without her permission. Keeping it coded for the podcast and keeping it in check and in line. Well, not much hope for that one.

SPEAKER_00:

I love her. I love her. Love her. That's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_01:

I mean, don't you and let's take out the fact, aren't we? No pun intended, right? Let's take out the fact that you are a reformed slut whore.

unknown:

Okay?

SPEAKER_04:

I prefer the term gigolo. No. I got paid. By the county.

SPEAKER_01:

However, let's take that out of the equation. Do you believe bringing in a third person is cheating on your marriage?

SPEAKER_04:

Yes.

SPEAKER_01:

Do you really do?

SPEAKER_04:

Yes. Since when? Since when? Since I married you, woman, and grew ethics and grew ethics. All that shit. So you grew ethics. Yeah, I grew it. Because I didn't have any before. Because you're right. I I would just I sold my seeds everywhere. Probably 64 to 68 countries.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm gonna vomit my mouth now.

SPEAKER_04:

Some have.

SPEAKER_01:

Wow. Something in their mouth, right? Good God.

SPEAKER_04:

So yes, I have been reformed. They say when you put on the uniform, it's thrown at you.

SPEAKER_01:

That's not always true.

SPEAKER_04:

It's not always true, but in my case, uh I I had no lack thereof.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, you said something to me in the vehicle the other day that literally just stopped me, and I thought I knew everything.

SPEAKER_04:

And like So I don't I don't encourage uh I don't encourage folks to become cops.

SPEAKER_01:

But not just that, I mean, but infidelity goes to in all occupations. I mean it does, you know.

SPEAKER_04:

Like my best friend was very prevalent in law enforcement.

SPEAKER_01:

My best friend Kim, who passed away, used to say firemen have longer hoses and they come when it's hot and they leave it when it's wet. That would be her little thing. She used to go to the fire station if she thought there'd be a hot fireman there and say she needed her blood pressure check just so she could have it. She did. Well, you know Kim, that's just how she would be. But then if she got in there and there was some unattractive fireman, she's like, Oh, can you tell me how to get to She's like, you know, thank you. But I mean, seriously, you you think about it, but then it's so ironic because when I kid around with you and I say, Oh, imagine another man touching my face. You should see my husband's face when I say something like that. Imagine another man holding my face with his hands.

SPEAKER_03:

Crickets. Why are you making that face?

SPEAKER_00:

What about another man kissing my forehead?

SPEAKER_04:

No. Why? Again with a why.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

That's my head. That's MySpace. Y'all remember that shit? MySpace.

SPEAKER_00:

None.

SPEAKER_04:

None?

SPEAKER_01:

Did you ever let somebody out of a ticket and turn for sexual favors?

SPEAKER_04:

No. Really? Really? Really. I never I knew not to follow that trail.

SPEAKER_03:

Then how did you meet all the never mind?

SPEAKER_01:

Never mind. I just don't know how you pull it off. As a person who did it, like seriously, we need to tell people the warning signs so that the spouses know what to look for. Because I you used to call me up, depending, you know, when I would land from where I commuted back and forth across country for work and I'd get back on the red iron. And if I was in town that week or in town for a few days of that week, he'd be like, Come up and see me. And I'm like, Don't you gonna get tired of me? No, no, no, baby, come up here. And it was every single solitary night. And then when you worked extra jobs, you always wanted me to come sit with you on your extra jobs. And I'm like, You're gonna get tired of me. And you were the one always saying, No, no, no, baby, come up, come up, come up. And I did, but how could you jiggle more than me when I was with you all the time? Like, tell women how they can see the signs because their husbands, if they're cheating, sure aren't gonna help them see it.

SPEAKER_04:

Uh let's see. So, what my y'all, what my wife is basically referring to, I had a lot of side pieces. But not ponds, bags or chess pieces in law enforcement, and I was married.

SPEAKER_01:

Which I didn't know about.

SPEAKER_04:

I had a lot of like I said, side pieces, okay? Girlfriends, whatever you'll call them.

SPEAKER_01:

Girlfriends are more than a day.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, I told you some of them I kept around for years. My wife's staring at me. But you were one of them. I kept around for years.

SPEAKER_03:

How many were there while you were with me? I don't remember.

SPEAKER_04:

Don't really remember. But you know, some of the things that that I did is along the ta lines of logistics and tactics, you pick your battlefield. You tell them, okay, and and ladies, I'm not like this anymore, so you know, you can judge me for back then, but not now. Okay, I'm married to a a very straight wife, and I'm very faithful to her.

SPEAKER_01:

What do you mean a straight wife? I was straight back then.

SPEAKER_04:

Yes. You you everyone knows now that you're straight.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, but why did you use the word straight?

SPEAKER_04:

Because we just talked about a threesome. No, you requested it. Bring that up again.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay. So how did you juggle them when you wanted me with you every night? Like I don't understand that.

SPEAKER_04:

You pick the battlefield, you pick the location that you want one to come to that the others have no idea of.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, but you saw me every single night, and everybody who you worked with on extra jobs or the department all knew me.

SPEAKER_04:

They thought you were my wife.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, I guess. I don't know. But like, you know, your team, everybody knew only me. And when they found out we broke up because there were other women, nobody knew. Nobody had a clue. How do you do that when I was with you? Like everywhere.

SPEAKER_04:

So, you know, extra change of clothes in a gym bag. Hey, I'm going to the gym, but there's an extra change of clothes in the vehicle at all times.

SPEAKER_00:

You know that an extra uniform?

SPEAKER_04:

No. I think I had an extra shirt somewhere. My truck. I did carry my cologne around with me. A lot of women like to wear makeup and that shit gets on your face once you're sucking face with them.

SPEAKER_00:

I don't feel bad anymore.

SPEAKER_04:

So a lot of men will go wash their face.

SPEAKER_01:

But what are signs that a husband is cheating for the women out there that are wondering?

SPEAKER_04:

Definitely, you know, you know, I I don't know now, but back then, you know, won't answer a phone immediately, obviously.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, but if you're a cop, you can't always answer the phone immediately. So that's kind of an understood thing. It takes a special person to be married to a cop because you have to know, you know.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, that you know, there there are some good cops out there that are absolutely. And more power to them. I know it's it's a rough job. Uh it's very stressful. For the spouse as well. Yep. Because you don't never know. Because I think um tonight my wife said a couple officers died in the local area. Or at least one.

SPEAKER_01:

One died, and one is in critical condition. And we send our sincere condolences to that family and strongest wishes for the one in critical condition right now.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, and don't don't get us wrong, you know, we're all for law enforcement, military, but we're just not for the cheating aspect.

SPEAKER_01:

Or the beating.

SPEAKER_04:

Definitely the beatings, the abuse.

SPEAKER_01:

And they're higher in law enforcement and military families.

SPEAKER_04:

Which, you know, should be putting a book somewhere.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, okay. Smarty pants. Just go ahead and let that one out.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, everyone knows you write books like nothing. I was, I think I was downstairs. I don't even know what the hell I was doing. Yes, I was downstairs working on a billet, on a bracelet. And my wife comes up and says, Hey, I just wrote a book in an hour and a half. You did what?

SPEAKER_00:

Don't surprise you anymore.

SPEAKER_04:

Are you serious? Yeah. You're gonna sit over yonder five feet away from me. There we go with that measurement length again, and tell me to not get surprised if you write a book in an hour and a half.

SPEAKER_00:

Do you really want to do this?

SPEAKER_04:

Because if you get another damn doctorate, come to Frost later.

SPEAKER_01:

Because you don't even get surprised. Like you, when I get any kind of certification or degree or anything, and I show it to you, you're like, what do you want me to do? Because I expect this of you now. So I don't understand why you would hold this to be so different. Now, after 40 something books, you're not you're still surprised that I could do one that quickly.

SPEAKER_00:

Woman. Eating crow. How's that fun?

SPEAKER_04:

You don't even know how many certificates you have.

SPEAKER_01:

Over 300.

SPEAKER_04:

Over 300 effing freaking chitin certificates in what?

SPEAKER_01:

Everything from psychology, psychiatry. I don't have I'm not a psychiatrist. I didn't go that route. But like criminal psychology, psychiatry, psychology. I've done trauma first aid. I've done the whole spectrum of like special needs when it comes to everything from autism to I'm certified in tracheostomy, certified in gastroenterology, tube care.

SPEAKER_04:

Anything doing with children.

SPEAKER_01:

Anything to do with children, trauma, counseling.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay. That's certifications. Yeah. You've got three doctorates.

SPEAKER_01:

Honorably as well.

SPEAKER_04:

I have zero.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

You've written 46 books.

SPEAKER_01:

I don't even count. I don't even know. Well, no, some are workbooks and some are journals.

SPEAKER_04:

So here I haven't written any.

SPEAKER_01:

I've offered a joint write with you.

SPEAKER_04:

Pendro. So you asked me why I don't get excited? And now you're telling me to get excited?

SPEAKER_01:

Because you're you no, no, that's not what we said. You said, you know, I can't believe my wife came down there and said I wrote a book in an hour and a half. Like, I can't believe that she did this. But yet, whenever I come down, I'm like, look what I got, and I finished the course or whatever. And you're like, I expect that of you. It's kind of contradicting your previous statement of surprising that I could do something in an hour and a half period of time.

SPEAKER_04:

What do you want from me, woman? Do you want me to jump on down and myself?

SPEAKER_01:

You've done that before in Chick-fil-A.

SPEAKER_04:

I have. I'm over 50, y'all. I have shit myself in Chick-fil-A. And the backsplash on the wall. All over the toilet. That was left field.

SPEAKER_01:

That was way too much information. I bet it was. Thank God I wasn't there for that. What'd you do with your underwear?

SPEAKER_04:

I threw them bitches away.

SPEAKER_01:

At Chick-fil-A.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh yeah. Like Oh yeah. Once you shit your underwear, you you gotta throw them away.

SPEAKER_01:

Not everybody. You never know if you find them underneath a bed.

SPEAKER_04:

No, that was my. Oh. Huh? Nothing. What? So yes, y'all. My wife is currently work working on another book.

SPEAKER_00:

Why don't you talk about it?

SPEAKER_04:

I don't want to talk about it.

SPEAKER_00:

You're the one who brought it up.

SPEAKER_04:

You should be bringing it up.

SPEAKER_01:

What is it called?

SPEAKER_04:

It's called something, something, something, something.

SPEAKER_01:

No, it's a one-word title. You can talk about it. It'll be out hopefully here soon.

SPEAKER_04:

Are you serious? Yeah. The title of it is Shielded.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay. And the prerequisite behind it is Unquestionable.

SPEAKER_04:

Unquestioned authority. Someone hiding behind the badge, someone in a position to where they think they're untouchable.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes and no. That is definitely in there. It's really about it is also about a person that feels they're untouchable and hid behind power and money. But it's mainly about a system that is broken and does not help those of us that have gone through abuse, that have left us abandoned, and the system that has abused us as well by not doing what it's supposed to do, by turning the other way, by having the good old boy system. And I want to, you know, really preface that, you know, my husband is former law enforcement and military. And I thank the men and women of service all the time. When, you know, whenever we see officers, we thank them for what they do and still do. Like we very much advocate for law enforcement military, but in every orchid, there is bad apples, right? And that's what this is reflecting on. It's the boys that protect their own when they are abusing their spouse and children. And it's more about the spouses and how the rhetoric of interrogation and intimidation come into play. And that is why it makes it so hard for us as people going through abuse to come forward and try to get the protection that we are rightfully deserving of. And it really goes in and discusses that in great lengths. And it is very scary. It's chilling. It's it's it's got some twists to it, that's for sure.

SPEAKER_04:

So be on the lookout for that. Y'all go on Amazon and type in Victoria Cure. Her last name is spelled C-U-O-R-E. Victoria Cure, and look at the plethora of books that she has.

SPEAKER_01:

I just released one three days ago.

SPEAKER_04:

Don't forget about our little kitten. She has several books. Faith Cure Solomon.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes. I and yeah, we had one just released three days ago. And it is healing after narcissistic abuse. And it really digs deep into the healing pattern, how to heal after going through abuse, when you lose yourself and who you are, how to bring yourself back stronger than ever. And it's it's a really great book that makes you really sit and think about things that you would never ever think about if that wasn't there in front of you.

SPEAKER_04:

So y'all listen, listen to what I'm about to say. This is a woman who spent almost she spent all the her pregnancy at the hands of an abuser. She lived this. She knows what the hell she's talking about. Okay. Then years later, she's still suffering some of those effects. She's written books about this. She's written her memoir. Pretty cool. She knows what the hell she's talking about. Alright, let's go further. I just explained, and she just confessed, that she has over 300 certificates and degrees concerning the field of abuse. Everything she mentioned. Okay. She has the knowledge there, y'all.

SPEAKER_01:

And we were recognized. We got six international awards.

SPEAKER_04:

She knows what she's talking about. Go grab one of these books and pick it up. Okay. Is it self-help? Absolutely. Is it healing? Absolutely. You know, will it save somebody's life? It already has.

SPEAKER_01:

And now you know why I fell in love with him.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh. So please. For y'all's sake.

SPEAKER_01:

Because you're worth it. You're absolutely worth it. Like, you know, my husband gave me this look when I came home from the grocery store the other day. And I went to a grocery store that I wasn't planning on going to. And I'm coming out of the grocery store, and this beautiful young lady is there. I'm gonna ask if she can help me to my vehicle and put the groceries in. And I can see she's in distress. And she asked me very quietly if she if I would tell her what happened to my arm. And I said, absolutely, but can you tell me if you're okay? And I could tell in her face and her disposition that she wasn't. And after seeing that and reading her body language, I basically told her that I survived domestic violence and that there was all these other things going on. And she opened up and told me her story. And I told her, I said, I want you to come look at the reflection of yourself in the window. And I said, You see this beautiful woman right here, you're beautiful, and you should say this to yourself five times a day. And I said, The only reason anybody should ever put their hand up near you is if they're coming around to hug you with your permission, or they're high-fiving you with your consent, or they're to telling you, or they're telling you with each finger, you are beautiful. You are beautiful, you are beautiful, you're beautiful. Guess what? You're beautiful. Other than that, a hand should not be raised to you. And when I told her that she started crying, and the groceries didn't matter, nothing mattered. It was her and I in a big open parking lot talking about the fact that she survived this horrific experience which caused brain trauma and damage. And she's absolutely just a stunning human being. And when you have those moments, you realize that this is a calling. This is absolutely a calling. And you know, I didn't have somebody to talk to when I went through this. I went through this alone. And I went through this as a single mom with my beautiful daughter. And between the two of us, we are well over. What do we want to say now? Well over 175 surgeries to say is easy.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, yeah. If she's at 50, she's at 54. You're you're well at 150 yourself.

SPEAKER_01:

So this is talked about from experience. And I wish I had someone back then. And what I had was myself sitting with dislocations and broke and this and that and bruises and you know everything you can imagine. And I'm sitting in a wheelchair at my daughter's bedside in the NICU. Well, she's in a medically induced coma, and all I can do is write because I am being interrogated every time I turn around by somebody. Why did you make him mad? What did you do? Why couldn't you just done what he asked for? And and it was what? And then it was, well, when he broke your nose, who was around? What time of day was it? What was the weather? What were you wearing?

SPEAKER_04:

So you were being interrogated.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, I was interrogated left, right, and center. Absolutely. And you are reassaulted all over again. And it's literally why. Not, you know, we're here to protect you, we're gonna keep you safe. It's why did you make him mad? Why didn't you just do what he wanted? You know, are you sure you didn't ask for this? Are you sure you didn't bring this on yourself? And it was, well, who was there when he broke your nose? Who saw it? What were they wearing? Where were they standing? I'm gonna tell you flat out. One of the times that he cracked my nose was in a military installation, and his commander was on the other side of him. And his commander didn't do a damn thing. I was sitting inside my vehicle. He broke my nose, slammed it down into the steering wheel. And I did not care what time of day it was. I didn't care what the freaking weather was. I didn't care what position on the clock his commander was standing at. I cared that I was carrying my daughter. I cared that I was so dizzy I couldn't see in front of me. I cared that the nose that I had before wouldn't be again, and it was gushing blood down my mouth and my chin into my shirt and all over me. The the fact that I was so lightheaded and dizzy, I thought I'm gonna faint again in front of him, and then he's gonna do whatever he wants to me, as he has before. When I'm interrogated of just this one event itself, it was well, where was the commander? What was he wearing? What did he say? You don't know, and quite frankly, you don't freaking care because you don't. What you care about is survival, nothing else matters. You know, what led up to that situation? What was the conversation you had before? Why does it matter? Like it's not relevant. The relevancy is that I'm injured and y'all don't give a shit. That's what matters. And this happened. I mean, when we went to court and it was on the civil section of it, not the criminal, he testified in court that if he hit me once, he hit me 200 times. That was his testimony. And because it was not under criminal proceedings, there was nothing that the judge could do at that point. And the judge told him, You trained her. Like if you're an alcoholic and you want to get drunk, you gotta drink more than your normal drink. If you're a fighter in a ring, you train, you have trained her to tolerate your fist. And this is true, and it was just so overwhelming because you, as the person who goes through it, is literally, you know, being accosted just because why? Why, why? You know, he had a hard day at work or whatever the reason is. It doesn't matter what the reason is, it doesn't matter. You know what? That doesn't make you a man. Raising your hand to anyone, women, children, animals, whatever, doesn't make you a man. And I'm specifically talking about this. I do know that men are abused. I'm not singling out that for a millisecond because I know it happens, and no one deserves to be abused. I'm saying in my situation, I am a woman, I am pregnant, and there is no justification, and you cannot call yourself a man and raise your hand and make contact with my person at any point in time, and then continue to call yourself a man because you're not. If you're gonna hurt a woman, a child, a pet, he killed my dog, my six month old puppy, to show me what he would do to me if I would leave. That doesn't make you a man. It makes you a coward. Makes you a Powered. And I know it's so hard for so many people who are currently in the situation to see that, but you will. You will see it. Because if you stay with me, work with me, let me help you, you will see it because it is the truth. It is the absolute truth. Because a real man walks away from whatever the situation is. He doesn't go and put his hands on you in an unwarranted manner. It just is not acceptable. My husband and I both have been through abusive relationships and family life. And we both made the very strong decision to break the cycle. And we could bring our daughter in here right now and she will tell you that she's never had a hand raised to her. She's never been yelled at. She's never been, nothing has ever been said to her that, you know, we regret saying, you know, for instance, if she did something wrong instead of saying, I hate that you just did this, or anything that would really hurt her, we're very cognitively aware of what we state to her. So if she did something wrong, I would say, you know, I love you, but I don't agree with the choice you just made. And that's what life is about, and that's why there's a pencil eraser, because that's how you learn. It's by mistake. We never talk down to her, we talk to her, and we broke the generational cycle. And it's not easy. It's not easy, you know. But who wants to end up like these monsters? And if you are in a situation right now and you have children, and it is the husband or boyfriend, stepfather, whatever the case may be, that is beating you, the woman, the children know more than you lead on to. They know it, they hear it, they see it, they feel it, they will sense it. Are you gonna allow your son to see that that behavior is acceptable for him to do to his partner, his girlfriend, his significant other? Are you gonna allow your daughter to learn and say that is acceptable behavior to accept from your partner? Because that's what they're seeing. They're seeing the pattern of behavior from the quote unquote parents of what is and is not acceptable and what their sense of normalcy is defined as. And I guarantee, when they get older and they get into that situation, if you get that phone call, it will rip your heart into shreds. You don't want to see your kids go through that. Good parents don't. I mean, some parents will take them on vacation, but literally, you don't want to imagine that. And so you are worth it. And even if right now you don't feel that you are worth it, look in the eyes of your children, look in the eyes of your sweet children that you carried and brought life to. And then ask yourself, are they worth it? Because they are, and they need to know that they don't deserve this, they don't deserve to be in a house, it's not a home, that is filled with uncomfortability and violence, abuse at whatever level it may be, it's still abuse, and that they have one shot at childhood, and they should not spend their adulthood recovering from their childhood. Because my husband and I still are, we always will be, and that's not something we ever want for our kids. I'm off my high horse now, you can talk.

SPEAKER_04:

You're doing great. Now, y'all see why I I encourage you to hop on over to contagious smile.com, and I think there's a tab on top that says books. Is that correct?

SPEAKER_01:

Well, you can no Victoria Cure. Yeah, Victoria.

SPEAKER_04:

Uh so look at VictoriaCure.com. Victoria Spelt Common. Cure A is C-U-O-R-E.

SPEAKER_01:

You can go to contagious smile.com, and in the far right corner up top under the menu, it does tell you how to get to our academy.

SPEAKER_04:

So y'all y'all pick up some of those books, okay? Some of them are just really a couple books written by my daughter about me.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh God. They're all blank inside.

SPEAKER_04:

No, that was what's her face's accomplishments.

SPEAKER_01:

Which what's her face?

SPEAKER_04:

The one that tried to run for president.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, her. We might have some listeners that support her.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, I don't. Anyway.

SPEAKER_01:

Lord.

SPEAKER_04:

But y'all uh y'all pick up some of those books. They're they're a great help.

SPEAKER_01:

And you can always reach out to us, and when you come to us, it's confidential. And it's nice to know you have someone to talk to that you have someone to listen to. And you know, you can always put your ear pods in, and I know he's gonna say, Well, what about your hearing aid? And you can listen to these four tidbits of knowledge to help you. You know, I really do need to do a podcast where I go through how I escaped because it was unlike anything I've heard of. When I talk to survivors and I hear how they planned their escape, you have to have a plan. If not, you'll end up going back. And the average person goes back seven times. And why did you laugh?

SPEAKER_04:

How many times did I go back?

SPEAKER_01:

You went across country looking.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. And the it was it was close to get close to seven.

SPEAKER_01:

And I really think we need to do an episode where I talk about how I did escape because it I was constantly degraded, and then I got to the point where people were like, why do you have so much evidence? Because A, no one believes me, and I am the evidence queen, number one. And then number two, because I wanted enough proof that if he killed me, he could never get my daughter. That was so important to me. And so I kept gathering, gathering evidence, and it didn't matter what I presented, because they were still protecting him. And that's kind of another basis for the book coming out Shield, Shielded, but it's literally the fact that you can get out, you can escape, you can get protection, you can, you know, make yourself safe, and you can have a great life. I'll tell you what, it's hard for me to go back and think, you know, 20 years ago, I was told I had a 2% chance of survival, right? I wouldn't make it through the night. And I didn't even look human. I was totally disfigured and and broken everything everywhere. And I was in the ICU and I couldn't even get out of bed. And I thought, oh my God, I'm never gonna be happy. And during the whole course of it, I thought of Michael like daily, you know, he he does this thing where he touches my face. And I tried to do that so many times that I couldn't get that feeling that you did when you would touch my face. And I kept thinking, if he wins, I'll never see him again. That's what I kept telling myself every day. I'll never see him again. And I couldn't do that, and she deserves better than that. So literally, you know, when you lay there, and then every time somebody would walk by, I was in the ICU labor and delivery. Like the next room to me was a surgical OR for labor and delivery. And they would tell me I'll have her out in two minutes. And everybody walked by. I just kept thinking, even though I knew it wouldn't be, I just kept hoping it would be Michael, just walking by for no reason. He would never have been out way where way, way, way where I was. But it was me giving myself false hope at that point. And then you feel like, is this gonna be my life? Is this gonna be my forever? And then you realize that you do deserve better, you can achieve better. And you just have to know how to get there. And I did it by myself, and that's why we do what we do now to help others get there. And now I have this unconditional loving husband who, yes, he's a redneck, and I overlook some of that, but I couldn't imagine my life without him. And thank God for hair dye, because even though I am a natural redhead, he does almost give me gray hair once in a while, and I have to keep it red so that that doesn't happen. So just saying, now I give one of my dirty little secrets away. And now I'm old, so I love it when you talk dirty to me. Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

So y'all be looking for uh her new upcoming book here. We'll let you know when it's gonna be released.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm so excited. How many of them are you gonna read?

SPEAKER_04:

What?

SPEAKER_01:

Huh?

SPEAKER_04:

I gotta I gotta see a man about a horse.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, uh-huh. I bet what color is a horse?

SPEAKER_04:

Brown?

SPEAKER_01:

I bet. I could have bet that one. I sure could bet that one. Why do I gotta be a dork?

SPEAKER_04:

No reason.

SPEAKER_01:

So, how about you help me clean a room when we get off of this here in a room?

SPEAKER_04:

How about that? I've got loads of bracelets to uh start working on.

SPEAKER_01:

You're gonna go down there and go to sleep.

SPEAKER_04:

No, I've got bracelets to make.

SPEAKER_01:

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_04:

So we'll be able to uh put that on uh a website linked.

SPEAKER_01:

I have to build another website. Haven't I already built like five, six, eight?

SPEAKER_04:

We wanna come up with some good logos, a good stamp for our bracelets, our engravings. So y'all look out for that. Would you like to take us out? No, I'll let you darling. I love you. Good night, y'all, from a contagious smile.

Head Shot

Victoria Cuore

Host
Head Shot

Michael Solomon

Co-host