How A Couple Protects Joy From Outside Drama

People love our chemistry and our laughter, but we don’t pretend life is perfect. We keep our home “drama trauma-free” by choice, even when outsiders try to pull us into mess, guilt, or old family patterns. That simple rule sparks a bigger conversation about what it really takes to protect a marriage, rebuild trust, and keep joy from being negotiable. 

We go deep on relationship healing and hard honesty. Michael owns his past infidelity and talks about what finally changed when he stopped chasing ego and started choosing character. Victoria breaks down narcissistic abuse in plain language, including the way charm can turn into control, and why boundaries sometimes mean walking away from people you never expected to lose. If you’ve been through betrayal, manipulation, or an abusive relationship, you’ll hear validation plus practical mindset shifts. 

We also talk family advocacy, especially the loneliness many special needs parents face when “friends” disappear. From court and restraining orders to safety planning at home, we share why we take protection seriously without letting fear run our lives. And because this is us, you’ll also get the real-life chaos: service dogs, brand-new puppies, and the kind of humor that helps you breathe again. 

If you want more support, we mention our online academy with accessible courses and scholarships, plus Victoria’s books on narcissism and recovery. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs a push toward peace, and leave a review with your biggest takeaway.

Transcript

Banter And Why People Listen

SPEAKER_06 0:01

Howdy, y'all. Welcome to another episode of a Catasia Smile Unstoppable with your host. What's your name again?

SPEAKER_02 0:09

I don't know.

SPEAKER_06 0:10

That's my lovely bride and soulmate, Victoria Cure, author and award-winning wife and mother.

SPEAKER_02 0:20

Oh, Lord have mercy.

SPEAKER_06 0:21

Freaking awesome, y'all.

SPEAKER_02 0:22

Whatever.

SPEAKER_06 0:23

But she has she has published many books. Y'all can hear two. VictoriaCurie.com.

SPEAKER_02 0:28

You talk about that on every episode, my box. Oh, Lord have mercy.

SPEAKER_06 0:33

So she is currently 18,000 pans on the fryer right now, doing 18,001 different things.

SPEAKER_02 0:43

That's an understatement. Good night.

SPEAKER_06 0:46

And she is she's still going. Look, her leg is just she looks like she's getting ready for a race. Ready to go. Ready to go on at the bit.

SPEAKER_02 0:58

So, babe, what do you want to talk about tonight?

SPEAKER_06 1:01

Absolutely anything.

SPEAKER_02 1:02

That's not true.

SPEAKER_06 1:05

Other than that one subject we just discussed.

SPEAKER_01 1:07

But that needs to come to fruition.

SPEAKER_06 1:09

Any has anyone written you lately?

SPEAKER_02 1:12

Yeah, I get stuff all the time.

SPEAKER_06 1:14

Anybody stand out?

SPEAKER_02 1:16

People talk about how they love our camaraderie, they love our connection, our chemistry, our laughter. We make people laugh. Not everybody has the marriage we do. That we make people laugh, you give that we give people hope. But you know what? We do have daily drama. Well, I don't know if I'd say daily, but I mean people bring us drama. We have this philosophy that we're drama trauma-free, but we can't say that completely because there are people who bring it to us. But we, as our home, we are drama trauma-free. We don't bring drama and trauma to one another, it's just brought to us.

SPEAKER_06 2:00

Now I will bug the shit out of our daughter's faith.

SPEAKER_02 2:04

Yeah, you do. You love to push her buttons.

SPEAKER_06 2:08

I have this innate ability to find anyone's button and push it.

SPEAKER_02 2:11

Not anyone's.

SPEAKER_06 2:13

Not anyone's?

SPEAKER_02 2:14

Nope. Open the door. Let me in. Watch how this goes. I can yeah.

SPEAKER_06 2:21

You say not don't push it?

SPEAKER_02 2:23

No, you push hers all day long. I'm just saying, I know you don't push everyone's buttons.

SPEAKER_06 2:28

Whose don't I push?

SPEAKER_02 2:30

Your father's.

SPEAKER_06 2:32

He's not with us right now.

SPEAKER_02 2:37

So but even when he was, you didn't push his buttons.

SPEAKER_06 2:40

Yeah. He wasn't here long. Anyway.

SPEAKER_02 2:43

See, now you gotta explain that because you can't just do that. We have very loyal, loving followers and listeners. He's been saying that for a while now. I say hogwash.

SPEAKER_06 2:57

Let me tell y'all something.

Drama Trauma-Free As A Rule

SPEAKER_02 2:59

My wife made a comment just now that people bring us drama and drama. They're not envious, they're not jealous, but they're they look to they love the pomarery, they love the the connection.

SPEAKER_06 3:17

Okay. I made a million gazillion mistakes in my past. Okay. I was I was not faithful to my to any wife that I had. And I've had three.

SPEAKER_02 3:32

Wait a minute, you've been faithful to me.

SPEAKER_06 3:34

Yes. But you just said to any let me let me clarify any my any wife prior to you. Okay. Okay? And you are my third. So and final. I had I didn't have to find the wrong people in my life in order to get the right one. But it it did teach me what I took for granted. Okay? Right here in front of me. This woman, even though I bring her breakfast in bed, a waffle from Ego.

SPEAKER_02 4:08

It's an Ego waffle.

SPEAKER_06 4:10

I love her dearly. And she would literally give me the shirt off her back.

SPEAKER_02 4:17

I'd give you my left hand.

SPEAKER_06 4:18

She'd give you folks.

SPEAKER_02 4:25

We didn't get to this place overnight. And we didn't get to this place easy. We had, we have had, and still kind of do, many people try to come in between us.

SPEAKER_06 4:37

Oh my god, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:39

And you'd be shocked as to who they have been.

SPEAKER_06 4:43

We have we we have watched our so-called friends stab us in the back, turn their back on.

SPEAKER_02 4:50

Now, let me just add something to that before you go on. And and I I can say this without a doubt, and I know all of our special needs mamas and daddies know this to be true. That when you are given the gift of a beautiful child that has some type of special needs, you lose a lot of your friends. I lost so many people in my life, and you know what? I told Faith from the jump, I didn't lose nobody. There's the door, don't let it hit you with a good Lord split you because that could be you one day, you know. I never thought four years ago that I would be a hand-free device, like literally, because I'm mostly metal, I'm mostly titanium. So I'm kind of a hand-free device, like a Bluetooth in a way. And I, you know, kind of do have Bluetooth. But it's you you think, oh my God, these people are leaving my life. I'm losing all these people. No, you're not, you're gaining the truth. You're realizing that they only wanted what was best for them. And then when you couldn't provide that anymore, they said to hell with you. And that is just showing your true colors. And for that, I say thank you. But when your own family try to, because of the envy and jealousy, and you know, we have shown both sides of the track, if you will, that we don't care about mansions and millions and just we don't care about the greed and the envy. We care about the unconditional love and respect and friendship that he and I have for one another. And that's what we care about. And in today's world, that's really hard to find.

SPEAKER_06 6:38

You're so right, Victoria.

SPEAKER_02 6:39

I'm saving that tidbit right there. What did you say again? I'm deaf. Did you say I was right?

SPEAKER_04 6:43

You want to write this down?

SPEAKER_02 6:44

I might need to.

SPEAKER_04 6:46

But you say it all the time. You are right. You say that all the time. And yet I'm sort of the boss. Bitch, please. We all know better than that.

SPEAKER_06 6:54

Anyway, now that she's off in her fantasy world.

Infidelity Regret And Finding A Soulmate

SPEAKER_03 6:58

Um too many crickets.

SPEAKER_06 7:04

To clarify, I went down a uh a hard road that I chose with a bunch of lies and messing up friendships and you know, other people's relationships because of, you know, lust and and just being a guy that was unfaithful to his wife. And you know, I ended up in an abusive relationship on my second marriage and you know, really didn't realize it until I met my current wife.

SPEAKER_01 7:43

Well, that's not true because we met that you didn't realize it till you met your current wife because we met before 25 years ago.

SPEAKER_06 7:52

Until we started talking again. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 7:55

Okay. So we're a factually based organization, and I just want to make sure that we stay on that route.

SPEAKER_06 8:02

So what I'm getting is, y'all, if if you're in a relationship that you ought not be in.

SPEAKER_02 8:09

You ought not.

SPEAKER_06 8:10

That's right.

SPEAKER_02 8:10

Stop thinking with the wrong head.

SPEAKER_06 8:13

True. You have probably I can't say this because I'm not, you know, uh clairvoyant. You probably have a soulmate out there. You just don't know it yet.

SPEAKER_02 8:29

I knew the moment I saw you 25 years ago.

SPEAKER_06 8:33

I I should have known, but I had my head up my ass and other people's asses, and like I should have known. Sorry.

SPEAKER_02 8:40

But I literally, you know, and and I know I've said this before, but I kept wanting the love that my grandparents had, and I was like, and they're like, we don't care how many mistakes you make, how many whatever, you keep going to you find that one. And when you find that one, you're gonna know. And I was like, what? No way, like, how is that possible? And I saw how he pulled the chair out for her and look at my beautiful bride, and she kept every greeting card he ever made her or wrote her, or you know, and they were together over 50 years, and it was a beautiful marriage. And I heard from my biological sperm and egg donor, supposedly, that they fought, but I've never ever remember them fighting ever. They kept it away that I never saw. And the love and understanding they had for each other. I mean, like, I've never left faceide when she's been in the hospital or any day for that matter. And that's exactly how they were. And so when I I was asked to, what do you want to call it? I just lost the word to you. I was asked to haze you, if you will, when you got done, you know, you were an FTO training when you were still wet behind the ears. And I was at the academy numerous days a week. I was in a uniform myself, and I knew like the uniform doesn't do anything for me. Like it just seems to be that's the kind of person that I can have a conversation with because to me, when I was in corporate world, I didn't get along personally on a professional, like a personal relationship because I didn't have that much in common with them. They didn't mean they were bad people, it was just not my thing to date. And out he walks, and I thought, I get it. Like I remember I never saw past his face. And he's a tall drink of water on a hot summer day, and he walks up to me at night in a parking lot, and all I saw was his face. I didn't see anything else. I saw he was tall, he was hot, and he had some smoking eyes. And that's all I saw. And I remember looking up going, I got it. I now understand, understand what you were talking about all these years, and I knew right then. And I called my best friend who has now passed away, and I was like, I'm in big trouble. And I think she peed on herself, she was laughing so hard because they used to like her theme song for me was another one bites the dust, because I could just walk away in the middle of a date and not care. And you know, and I I was like the prude, you don't drink, you don't smoke, what do you do? You know, goody two shoes. Because I was boring when it came to that stuff, but when I saw you, I just knew.

SPEAKER_06 11:24

So y'all hear this wonderful woman over here who has been awarded multiple awards, and she is she has put together a phenomenal academy.

SPEAKER_01 11:39

The academy.

SPEAKER_02 11:40

You're starting to sound like a Yankee. I love it.

SPEAKER_06 11:43

For those of y'all who have not been over to our website, get on our website, the contagious smile.com, and also hop on over to a cottage smile.mn as in mikenancy.co. And that's our academy. You can sign up for free, and there are a lot of free courses in there.

SPEAKER_02 12:03

And there's something for everybody in all the different collect collections. It's not just and then we have stucco squad in there for the kiddos, and stucco squad books are coming out slowly, but we have four live and three in the turnpipe of about to come out live, and then there's three more waiting, and I'm working on the other series now.

Narcissism Lessons And Cutting Ties

SPEAKER_06 12:22

So Stucco Squad series is very dear to her heart. My baby. Because her service dog is named Stucco, and he is a golden, a red golden retriever, and that boy is so jealous when I touch my wife and I try to hug or kiss her.

SPEAKER_02 12:40

Ooh, he comes running.

SPEAKER_06 12:42

Come in between us in a heartbeat and push me away.

SPEAKER_02 12:45

Yeah, he does. That's my mama. That's my mama. But like you were saying, you know, it's at the end of the day, a narcissist will promise you a dream and deliver you a nightmare. It is such the simplest way to explain it. And both sides of our families are just swimming in narcissism in the narcissistic pool. We we have on both sides, and they'll promise you what they think you want to hear and deliver the complete opposite. And it was just, I mean, we have been through it, but we just refuse to allow anyone to provide us anything but happiness. If you're not gonna provide happiness that we're gonna provide to you, then we have, you know.

SPEAKER_06 13:37

Yeah, we want to cut ties and just walk away.

SPEAKER_02 13:39

I mean, we will get a phone call, and this has happened numerous times, we'll get a phone call at you know, 10 o'clock, 11 o'clock at night from somebody that says, Hey, we don't have air conditioning, and we'll drive six hours down to go get somebody. And that's what we've always been like. But then when we ask even the tiniest thing in return, it's all to hell with you. I mean, that's simply so safe to say.

SPEAKER_06 14:06

My wife's first book, Who Kicked First, mentions a little bit about narcissism. Her second book is the prequel to the to that first book. The prequel, it's called Narc Narc Who's There, really goes into detail and it's it's evidence-based. See what a narcissistic I won't even say father, but person can be like so pick that up, y'all.

Safety Mindset From Court To Home

SPEAKER_02 14:37

And even when you think the calm of the storm is done and you think the passing of it is gone, you find out things that are kind of shocking. I actually have learned that, and we know who provided my he's not a person. I call him idiot. Provided idiot my I don't want to call him my the ex that was abusive, our address. And to even go a step further, uh male has come to us with that name. And it it's just I mean, I don't even know how how you would you say to that, like you know, it how dumb is someone to like you know you're gonna get it, you're gonna see it, right? And it's like, okay, you know, and I've had so many people say, Are you worried about him coming back around? No, I'm not. You know, he said in court, he's petrified of me because of my background. Well, and I've stated in an open court on record that I never hit him first, I'll never hit him first, ever. But he would walk right up next to me if we were in a restaurant or wherever we would be, he would he wouldn't care that Michael was sitting right there. He would walk right up next to the two of us and punch me square in the face. He's done it, he would do it again. And I stated in court, I never hit him first, but I have the right to stop the threat. I have the right to protect myself and I have the right to protect my child. And I will never ever lay hands on him first. I've never gone to his place of residency, I've never gone after where he works. You know, we have our home is like Fort Knox. It's so much like a Pentagon in its own right because we have 20 cameras or whatever the number is. We have motion sensors and cameras and all of it's recorded, and we have alarms, and we have four dogs, and you know, and everybody here is a gun-carrying person and a very good shot. And the thing is, is you know, we're not seeking anything, but we've had, I can't even tell you how many people have come here that have been abused, that come to us for many different reasons. We've had lots of survivors of abuse, we've had special needs kiddos come over here, we've had, you know, all different, you know, events where we've had other people come around. And so for that reason, we make sure that we have a safe home and a safe environment for not just us, but for everybody. And that's you know, all I have to say about that. And anybody who knows me knows that I'm a very safe person. My husband and I carry everywhere that we go, and that's you know what I gotta say about it.

SPEAKER_06 17:27

I'm glad you brought that up, Victoria. Okay speaking of our family being a great shot, our daughter and I were at the gun range.

SPEAKER_02 17:37

You've already told everybody about your little one millimeter bruise. What?

SPEAKER_06 17:41

It's still there.

SPEAKER_02 17:42

No, it's not, and I even told them about what happened at the hospital. Look at that scar. Where?

SPEAKER_06 17:47

That is a good shot scar.

SPEAKER_02 17:49

Are you kidding? Everybody, let's go back and think of lethal weapon where Renee Russo and Mel Gibson decide to start comparing scars. Are you serious? You want to compare scars to me? What the hell is that? That is smaller than a pencil eraser.

SPEAKER_06 18:05

It's still a good shot wound.

SPEAKER_02 18:06

Do you want to look at stabs stabbing wounds? Because I have over 12 of them. Okay. So that wasn't a good shot if it grazed you. Who was to be stabbed? Nobody raises their hand and says, Okay, I have nothing to do today, stab me. Nobody says that.

SPEAKER_06 18:23

Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 18:24

Okay, and I've been stabbed well over a dozen times. So, and we're not talking about just let's put in the knife and turn and twist. We're talking about let's carve Victoria like a freaking Thanksgiving turkey.

SPEAKER_06 18:35

You're not a trophy, you're a trophy. Wait a minute, what? What I mean, you it's not a trophy to have scars like that.

SPEAKER_02 18:43

But you know what? They're reminders that I'm a warrior and that I survived.

SPEAKER_06 18:46

They sure are. Yes, you did. Yes, and I survived this gunshot wound.

SPEAKER_02 18:52

There is no comparison to your what is it from the minions the when Vector's like, it's an itty bitty little toilet. That's about it's an itty bitty little crazy moon. That's about what that is. I mean, seriously, get a pencil, take the little lead, go on a piece of paper, and that's about a millionth time larger than this little boo-hoo thing. Even the doctors, including chiropractors, all said they couldn't see it. So, men and their doggone sizes.

SPEAKER_06 19:24

We do not exaggerate.

SPEAKER_02 19:26

Okay, right. Uh-huh. Right.

SPEAKER_06 19:31

Well, our daughter Faith is becoming a damn good shot.

SPEAKER_02 19:34

He is hysterical. Uh, you tell her to do a headshot, and she does the one between a man's legs, and she's like, I just yeah, I have to get certain silhouettes that they're fun silhouettes. So we get all different ones, and she just, you know, I love the fact that she she's just no doubt she gets it from her mother.

SPEAKER_06 19:53

Excuse me? What I'm the one out there coaching her.

SPEAKER_02 19:57

Uh and you get yourself grazed.

SPEAKER_06 20:01

Okay, you got a point.

SPEAKER_02 20:02

And she is a very good shot. She is she gets it for me.

SPEAKER_06 20:07

Anywho's.

SPEAKER_02 20:08

Yeah, uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06 20:10

So our two new family members are doing absolutely wonderful in our home. River and Amber, River Rose and Amber Blaze. Yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:22

I'm looking at them on the camera, and there's the river right now, just up and about. Oh, she's just the cute. They are so stinking cute. And they are white golden retrievers. So we have candy cane dogs.

SPEAKER_06 20:37

Like literally. They're between what 11 and 14 pounds now, somewhere in that mark. Yes. They they are they are fun, they're nine weeks. They're curious. They're they're learning the pea pads inside when it's raining.

SPEAKER_02 20:51

Even though your dog took a big dump right in front of you the other day, that was hilarious.

SPEAKER_06 20:54

They're just they're well-mannered dogs.

SPEAKER_02 20:58

And we have candy cane dogs because stucco and rusty are are rare, they're rare red, and then the other rare breed color for a golden retriever is white. And so we have two white and two red. Hence the candy cane. They're so cute.

SPEAKER_06 21:14

They are.

SPEAKER_02 21:15

They are sending out a thank you to Will and Mindy once again for and I may have gotten them little loves, and so they carry them around in their mouth and love on them, and they're just so cute. You can't help it. It's uh they're they're so cute. And I mean, when they're asleep, I'm like, why are they in their sleep? Why? Why? I try to have them in here with me while I'm working one at a time in my lap, but you can't because you can't work, they just want to love all over you and give you kisses and you know, and it's like I can't, I can't work, you know. I have to hold her with one hand and I have her in my lap, and then they just want to be all lovey dovey and you and you can't focus on what you're trying to do. Because they're just so stinking cute. I mean, they really are. They're so much fun.

SPEAKER_06 22:08

So we're gonna be putting out some of our merchandise here recently that I've been making down in our shop.

SPEAKER_02 22:16

And we're gonna put it up on my website, Victoria Carey.

SPEAKER_06 22:22

So we'll we'll have a link up in case y'all want something from a Catages Smile. Handmade. These are handmade.

SPEAKER_02 22:28

Why is it gotta be hand?

SPEAKER_06 22:30

Ha ha. It it's uh Nubane.

SPEAKER_02 22:36

You didn't even mention what's coming out in less than a week, article-wise.

SPEAKER_06 22:41

Do for didn't forget. CEO times?

SPEAKER_02 22:46

No. Let's start with it has three letters.

SPEAKER_06 22:49

CEO.

SPEAKER_02 22:50

No. Has a vowel, a consonant, and a vowel.

SPEAKER_06 22:56

Give up.

SPEAKER_02 22:56

USA.

SPEAKER_06 22:57

USA Today. Yes. Another featured on USA Today. Yes. You go through so many. Thank you.

SPEAKER_02 23:10

I'm trying to cap up uh catch up to how many women you used to have.

SPEAKER_06 23:13

Oh, you won't. Yeah, yeah. Forget it.

SPEAKER_02 23:15

Yeah, I'm still having a hard time with the whole five to eight at a time.

SPEAKER_06 23:19

Uh let's not go there again.

SPEAKER_02 23:21

Slut.

SPEAKER_06 23:22

Thanks a lot. I was such a prudent. Former slut. I was such a prudent.

SPEAKER_02 23:33

Not always.

SPEAKER_06 23:34

I was on the job and then I was on the job. Stop talking.

SPEAKER_02 23:41

Because that is disgusting. That makes me want to internally exfoliate myself to know that here I am thinking you were my boyfriend and you had no one else but me. And I mean I would haul butt from the airport to come see you on the red eye. And little did I know that you were flying up somebody else's skirt while I was landing, you know, to come up and see you. I had no idea.

SPEAKER_06 24:08

Well, let me ask you, did that make me a form of narcissist?

SPEAKER_02 24:12

Narcissist? Yeah. In your own way. But I mean, I don't that because I control the situation. You're you have changed so much since I told you bold face lies to your face again. And I had no idea. I had such blinders on because I absolutely could not imagine you doing the first doggone thing wrong. I just couldn't.

SPEAKER_06 24:38

I I hid everything pretty well.

SPEAKER_02 24:40

No, you had it exceptionally well. I had no clue about any of this stuff you were doing.

SPEAKER_06 24:50

So not only to you, but to the other females involved. And there are many of them.

SPEAKER_04 24:55

Well, that was pretty easy because you didn't first wife.

SPEAKER_02 25:00

Yeah, let me tell you how much fun that was the first time I physically met her again 20 years later.

SPEAKER_06 25:06

I'm not saying this is a badge of honor for me. I'm just saying I'm asking you.

SPEAKER_02 25:12

You changed dramatically. Like it's very rare that a narcissist could change. I don't think, I don't know. That's a tough question because would I call you a narcissist? That's a borderline question because I didn't do the bad stuff to you, you know. No, and that's why I'm borderline because you made me feel like I was the only one in your life. Right. Yes, but the reason I would say maybe it's because you were like a habitual liar, but I had no idea. I mean, you were that good.

SPEAKER_00 25:43

Okay, but look.

SPEAKER_02 25:44

But we spent nights together, weekends together. Yeah. I mean, you would come over to my apartment, you left you made sure to leave stuff at my apartment so nobody would ever come over there thinking I wasn't taken. And I even stayed at your place for numerous days, but you you know, there was nothing female there.

SPEAKER_06 26:02

I don't I don't mean to compare, but is there any similarity in how the idiot approached you in the beginning of the relationship to what I did? Let's say the the charismatic whining and dining. No.

SPEAKER_02 26:24

Okay, it was different, yeah, he has done he has done the exact same and taken to the exact same places with every person he's ever been with. Like the same restaurants, everything.

SPEAKER_06 26:40

I mean, I mean, from you know, if I if I'm cheating on my wife, I'm never gonna take my my side piece, my J2, my girlfriend to the same restaurants.

SPEAKER_01 26:50

I think why you took us all to the same movie theater.

SPEAKER_06 26:54

That was different. Why I knew where all y'all were.

SPEAKER_02 26:59

I would be waiting for you, and little did I know. Oh my god, I just feel nauseous. I was such a prude, and I I mean, I couldn't think you did anything wrong ever.

SPEAKER_06 27:11

And and folks, I've paid dearly for this, trust me. I've I've lived with regret for many years. And thank God I did not contract an STD or any type of veneral disease, you know, for being unfaithful. And and I do not condone being unfaithful to your partner, to your significant other, to your spouse. I don't condone it. If you're in a bad relationship, my wife is available. You'll find out how to get out of it. I'm available. Find out how to get out of it from her. She has a course in the academy.

SPEAKER_02 27:44

She's there's many, many courses.

SPEAKER_06 27:47

Um you can email her. She's she does Zoom uh conference meetings. Cheers. One-on-one therapy. Oh, there's our puppies. There's one of them. They need some therapy, some love therapy.

SPEAKER_04 28:00

They need love.

SPEAKER_06 28:02

But yeah, I don't condone it, and I I do say that you do you might have a soulmate out there somewhere. I I don't know. You know, I I'm just I'm optimistic. I have mine, and I'm never letting her go. And if she passes before I do, I will never get remarried. Our kid wouldn't let you. That's true too. She she carries a pair of scissors around in her satchel. Satchel.

Adoption Love And Survivor Language

SPEAKER_02 28:29

And says she'll cut your balls off if you ever cheat on me. Right? I mean Well, you know, one of the sweetest things that that child has ever said, and there is a lot to compete on about it, is she she stated that she do you remember when she said this to you? She actually told you that she wanted you to love me as much as I have loved her because I deserve that much unconditional love. Yeah. And to have a child say that is just the sweetest thing ever. And I mean, that kid has the biggest heart you've ever met, and she's just as sweet as can be. And what did you do? You see, it's just she has the biggest heart and the sweetest heart ever. And I mean, even before you got back in the picture, I had always told her the only person that ever let be a dad is you. So I played mom and dad for a very long time.

SPEAKER_06 29:38

So yes, that's true. So after four years of marriage, three and a half, four years of marriage to my wife Victoria, I was given the honor and privilege of adopting our daughter Faith. And she is mine, it is legal, it is on her birth certificate. I am the father.

SPEAKER_02 29:59

Oh, you're really ralling up somebody.

SPEAKER_06 30:01

Oh. And um, yeah, she's she's our heart.

SPEAKER_02 30:08

But you know, what it is is I had told her from day one, the only person I would ever let be her dad is you. That's what I had always told her. Then he's watching the puppies, he ain't listening to me. Then he asked her permission to marry me, and then he asked my permission to adopt her, and we had to wait because many people know that a couple of years ago we almost lost faith, and that was horrific. And so we waited for her to get better and feel better, but from day one, they've considered each other like biologically one another's, and it's super, super sweet.

SPEAKER_06 30:53

She's a pain in my butt at times, but I love her dearly, and I'm sure I'm a pain in her butt too. Uh-huh. Yeah. She's down there playing with the puppets right now, y'all. It's so cute. She's playing with her dog Amber. She named her Amber Blaze. It's really cute.

SPEAKER_02 31:14

But you've never thought of her even as an adopted child. You've always thought of her as yours. I mean, you freaking tell her that she's your leftover squiggly.

SPEAKER_06 31:24

Did you uh okay? You went there.

SPEAKER_02 31:26

I did go there.

SPEAKER_06 31:27

And all y'all know what a squiggly is. Sperm.

SPEAKER_01 31:33

Like that had to be some hidden stuff for a minute.

SPEAKER_06 31:38

Y'all new to the show. We are unfiltered, unscripted. We just say whatever comes to mind. We do care. We my wife does advocate. And you know, we're all about special needs families, but also about laughter because that's so important.

SPEAKER_02 31:53

You have to laugh.

SPEAKER_06 31:55

And if you're a current survivor, you're no longer a victim.

SPEAKER_02 31:59

You're they're never a victim. Nobody's ever a victim. I hate that word.

SPEAKER_06 32:04

Excuse me. You can't get out.

SPEAKER_02 32:06

I hate that word.

SPEAKER_06 32:07

You're not stuck where you are.

SPEAKER_02 32:09

I have a question for you. If you found out, I've been asked this before. I have been asked this before, and I've never brought it up on a show. If you found out that idiot was listening, what would you say to him?

SPEAKER_06 32:25

My address is No. No.

SPEAKER_02 32:31

Seriously, I have been asked this before. If Michael knew that idiot was listening, what would you say to him?

SPEAKER_06 32:39

Here's my phone number, let's meet up.

SPEAKER_02 32:41

No, no, absolutely not.

SPEAKER_06 32:43

No.

SPEAKER_02 32:44

No. Seriously.

SPEAKER_06 32:46

Seriously. Oh, I don't want to ask him. Do you remember what I told you in that bathroom? You're an asshole.

SPEAKER_02 32:57

This is one of my eighth wonder world wonders because I don't know what happened. I don't have a clue what happened in that bathroom in court. He hated you with nuclear capability. And I have no idea. And when you walked back in and sat down beside me, I said, What happened? And you said, There's some things you just don't need to know. And I was just because I wanted to know. And I just still don't know. And that's not okay. Like, I need to know.

SPEAKER_06 33:27

So as a police officer, I I was in uniform and I went to court with Victoria. More than once. During her trial to divorce and to get no, this was TPO.

SPEAKER_02 33:41

You went to TPO and the bindover. No, you didn't go to bind over. You went to TPO and then you went to the permanent restraining order.

unknown 33:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 33:49

And then I even told you he was coming in before nobody saw him yet. So I was like, he's here.

SPEAKER_06 33:53

They're in court. And he got up to go to the restroom. Well, I just kindly followed after him.

SPEAKER_02 34:00

And that was I had never wanted a penis more in my life. I wanted to go in that bathroom. Because then I could go into the men's room.

SPEAKER_06 34:08

You want a penis now?

SPEAKER_02 34:09

Stop it. I wanted to go into the men's room and see exactly what was happening. And I couldn't, so I had to sit there and wonder and wait. So now, folks, this has been 20 plus years. Well, more than that, right?

SPEAKER_06 34:22

No.

SPEAKER_02 34:23

No, it hasn't even been 20. It's close enough.

SPEAKER_06 34:26

It's been a lot of years. Yes. And I don't remember what a said to that piece of shit in the bathroom. Okay. I I was in uniform. I probably said something stupid and intimidating. I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 34:40

Well, you told him the first time you met him that if he ever hurt me, you'd kill him. Like that's you did say that.

SPEAKER_06 34:45

I don't remember. And my wife thinks I blocked this out.

SPEAKER_02 34:48

My wife thinks I so do a lot of psychiatrists, psychologists, and other people that I talk with professionally. They all think you did.

SPEAKER_06 34:54

So I am I am all for getting hypnotized. I'm all for it. Let's go.

SPEAKER_02 35:02

Okay, but you are going so left field. If you found out, and this has been requested by our listeners, if you found out that he was listening, what would you say to him about me or faith or whatever? It is a valid. I bet you I've gotten it four or five times.

SPEAKER_06 35:25

It it doesn't matter what I would say.

SPEAKER_02 35:31

Okay, how about this?

SPEAKER_06 35:33

I won their mine.

SPEAKER_02 35:36

That's incredibly powerful.

SPEAKER_06 35:41

Are you making fun of me?

SPEAKER_02 35:42

No, I'm being truthful. That is an incredibly powerful statement.

Body Changes Marriage Jokes And Confidence

SPEAKER_06 35:46

They are mine. That means he has no control over you. He has no rights to her.

SPEAKER_02 35:53

No, his rights are terminated.

SPEAKER_06 35:56

You have my last name, she has my last name. So people are gonna assume that anyway.

SPEAKER_02 36:11

Yes, so that's what you about Mickey Mouse, Stevie. If you even don't, I mean it, don't talk about my Mickey Mouse.

SPEAKER_06 36:19

I'm so proud of my wife Victoria here, y'all. She has lost so much weight that I probably just have on a big fat mouth and said something stupid. But uh, she has lost weight that she didn't have to begin with.

SPEAKER_02 36:35

I'm so proud of her. My ass had its own zip code and now it's lost a digit.

SPEAKER_06 36:40

But my wife's getting sexier. The only thing I do disagree with is that she's loosen her boobs.

SPEAKER_02 36:47

I knew you were gonna say that. I knew verbatim you were gonna say that.

unknown 36:50

Verbatim.

SPEAKER_02 36:50

Verbatim. Like, and I'm ecstatic that they're gonna continue to go and get smaller. Yes. Absolutely. Anyway, yeah, shrink those bitches up. No, they've already been lifted because I had to have a breast reduction. Not by choice, but there's always a silver lining to even the darkest cloud. Because when the doctor said your new shoulder can't hold those kazangas because they were big, then we have to do a reduction. And I was like, sweet. So when I lay down, it doesn't go flap flop anymore. And then they say we lift you. So then you don't even have to wear a bra, which all women know is a godsend because you don't have to wear the boulder holder, right? You can just boulder holder, yes, those things are like horrible bras, yes, they dig into your shoulders and hurt your back, and so you know you don't have to deal with the boulder holder anymore, and they're lifted, so you I never have to worry about furniture disease.

SPEAKER_06 37:49

Okay, I think people's got a good visual of you right now.

SPEAKER_02 37:52

So furniture disease is when your chest goes into your drawers, yes, right? So women who don't keep themselves up and you know taken care of, their boobs start sagging, and when you get older and older and older, they like go into your pants. And some people think you have three belly buttons or whatever, but when you've been lifted, that doesn't happen. So no furniture disease here.

SPEAKER_06 38:16

Okay, now we're we're left-filled T L I think a lot of women are laughing.

SPEAKER_02 38:22

They're laughing because they know it's right. Like, seriously, you come home and you want to just take the bra off and not worry about it anymore and let the girls go. And it's like y'all freeballing, like you know, like you're like, oh, I don't have to wear the tidy whitey holder boulder thing, you know. What are you looking at me like?

SPEAKER_04 38:40

Holder boulder men don't say holder boulder. Oh lord have mercy.

SPEAKER_02 38:49

I mean, you just don't you don't have to worry about them anymore. Oh we need to take some video and post them because they're so stingy. Is learning to climb the cage, the little pen, the play she's in a play pen right now, and it's full of lovbies and toys, and and she is just like she wants love, she wants to be held and snuggled up with and cuddled with, and oh they're just so cute. See, she agrees, yes, and that tail just a mile a minute, a mile a minute. So, Victoria, what do you have about Michael? We don't have to talk about my books all the time. We've got Amir coming on. I swear to you, I was about to say that we're always on the same page. See Jinx, you're right. Like every time we're always on the same this happens every day. People don't believe that it does, doesn't it? Every day, and it does. We always finish each other's sentences right now.

SPEAKER_06 39:56

You're thinking stop the podcast, let's go to the bedroom.

SPEAKER_02 40:01

No, I was thinking about Amir coming on the show.

SPEAKER_06 40:05

Amir, at least one of them coming.

SPEAKER_02 40:08

Wow.

SPEAKER_06 40:09

I hope Amir didn't hear that.

SPEAKER_02 40:11

Holy Snakes! Are you kidding me right now?

SPEAKER_06 40:16

I don't kid you.

SPEAKER_02 40:18

Oh my heaven. I can't believe you said that.

SPEAKER_06 40:21

This is a PG 1314.

SPEAKER_02 40:23

Well, it on Disney, it's like dreadpool or Deadpool or what I can't believe they had Deadpool on and now they supposedly amber back. They they now have like Deadpool Resurrected or something. Did you see that?

SPEAKER_06 40:39

Uh no.

Fame Culture Rants And Respect

SPEAKER_02 40:40

Yeah, they have a Deadpool resurrected. And you know, Deadpool is funny, but I can't believe it's on Disney. Like, seriously, that's on Disney. That's pretty shocking. And I just want to say, I have never, ever, ever, and my husband can agree to this, I have never been someone to watch those awards, like the Oscars and the Emmys. You know, I've never, ever, ever been someone who watched those shows. But I found out that they did not put Eric Dane on the list in the beginning where they talk about the actors who's passed away, you know, they didn't put him on there. And I think that's wrong because he had ALS and he was such a voice, and he was just an amazing human being. And they they snubbed him out of it. And I think that's wrong. I think that's completely unfair, you know. They and then they put these other people and like it's all over. I have never been or will I ever be a Kardashian person. I think that it's if I don't know how they're on TV, and I don't know how that they've continued to be on TV. And every time you turn around, they have kids. Who the hell watches their kids? Because they're always, oh, they're on vacation here, they're on vacation there. I mean, you know, they're always somewhere, they're always on vacation somewhere. I would never dress like they would, even if I, you know, whatever, to each their own. That's why there's chocolate and vanilla and mint chocolate chip. But right now, it's like constantly out there on the internet how Kim Kardashian took a spill in the bushes, leaving the Oscars, right? Okay, some people might think that's funny. But who cares? And at the end of the day, they can't put Eric up on there for, you know, a celebrity that's passed away, but we can hear all about how she, you know, lost her balance in a bush, or her kids have like piercings and spikes and stuff in their nails, and you know, whatever. I mean, it it makes no sense. This generation has gone to hell in a handbasket. It really has. And it and it just whatever. You know, I go out and I literally I used to wear a suit every day, and I was not in my comfort zone unless I was wearing a suit. That's where I was comfortable. Now I will go out in a pullover hoodie and workout pants or jogging pants and sneakers and whatever, and I'm comfortable, which is so weird, but I am, and people will recognize me and come up to me and say, I know who you are. And I'm like, hey, how are you? How can I help you? What can I do? What you know? I don't go up there and be like, you know, you need to be whatever because like that doesn't even make sense.

SPEAKER_06 43:24

Right, like um Adam Sandler's daughter, right? Not dressing a certain way to buy a bird thousand percent kudos to him.

SPEAKER_02 43:34

Yes, because he went in there, he she went in to buy a purse that was like ridiculous 30 grand or something like that. Just first of all, I can't even fathom spending 30 grand on a purse. But if you have the means to do it, more power to you. And to do that, and he went in there and bought everyone they had to prove a point.

SPEAKER_06 43:55

You know, I mean not right, not that he has money.

SPEAKER_02 44:00

he does have money. Right. But he did it to to prove a point that just because someone dressed that way doesn't mean right. Just because someone's dressed that way doesn't mean you have the right to to treat them a certain way. That's not how the things are supposed to be.

unknown 44:15

No.

SPEAKER_02 44:17

Some people make my head hurt. A lot of people make my head hurt.

SPEAKER_06 44:21

You're right. I don't know how to follow up with that.

SPEAKER_02 44:27

That's shocking. You always have something to say.

SPEAKER_06 44:32

I'm wearing one of our shirts. You wear one of our shirts daily eventually I'm going to get a shirt press and a hat press and we're going to make our all merchandise here.

Scholarships Community Support And Wrap-Up

SPEAKER_02 44:43

Uh-huh. Because I see some of the pictures why are you pointing my boobs? Here you are again on bop about my boobs. Again what what is your finger on right now in my on the picture? Okay it's on your boobs. In the picture not in real life like he's has his finger that just happened to be a spot that's I bet off uh I wonder why woman what easy greasy not an episode goes by you don't say easy greasy it just doesn't happen.

SPEAKER_06 45:16

Oh so thank y'all for those that have bought a cup of coffee.

SPEAKER_01 45:23

It's not a cup of coffee it's called buy me a coffee because that's the site.

SPEAKER_02 45:28

But it's a scholarship it's right because over 510 you don't pay attention you know you need to come to a meeting with me whatever it's like 525 right now.

SPEAKER_06 45:39

Okay 520 I said over 510.

SPEAKER_02 45:41

Okay. Okay that's that's like a man with their numbers again I mean seriously I love you.

SPEAKER_06 45:55

You should anyway coffee buying clicks clicks have awarded over five hundred and twenty five scholarships to individuals. So they what is she barking at?

SPEAKER_05 46:18

In the Academy and those classes y'all I mean they're they're they're pennies on the dollar.

SPEAKER_02 46:28

I mean they're they're we don't$4.95 but I've had them evaluated and they not one of them had been valued at under$100. None. And it's because I don't believe that a person's financial status should warrant whether or not that they get the help that they need. Right? There is in every single person's life there has come a time and a moment where you need help. And this is when that happens for these people and we're going to make sure you get the help you need and your bank statement shouldn't decide that for you. It shouldn't decide I just realized that one of them is in the crate because I saw the two bowls on top and they're shaking. So she's like let me we let because we have four two of them are outside right now using the bathroom our our two service dogs and the puppies we because we're up here doing the podcast Faith is letting one out at a time and she's letting her run around and play and and you know get her water and stuff like that. And then the other one will go back in the playpin here she goes running we'll go get back in the playpin. And then they let them out together so that they can get you know they're little and they have little bowls and we're watching our daughter you know go back and forth back and forth back and forth. So we do this individual time especially because they're so little and they're so fast. And we want to make sure because both of them like to hide under furniture. And so we want to make sure that you know that they stay safe and there's only one faith down there and we're up here right now so there's only one faith. There's only one faith no matter what anyway good good Tron Simmons. Right. And the people who had the opportunity to have her in their life and y'all screwed up y'all are stupid.

SPEAKER_06 48:23

Y'all I could almost say the F word y'all F up.

SPEAKER_02 48:27

Like I would I don't mean stupid is in mentally whatever I'm saying y'all are just idiots because that kid will do anything in the world for you and like she'll only want you to be her grandmother her grandfather you know whatever the case may be that's all she wants but y'all have to need a proctologist and have your heads in your asses that's all I'm gonna say and we know y'all listen oh we know you listen envy's a bitch that's all I got there Victoria okay can I have some puppy time yes can I have one of the puppies she's like oh my god is on camera spinning around in a circle trying to keep her eye on uh River oh oh look and there's such a difference when you pick one of them up versus the other because River is like four pounds lighter than Amber. Tell her to bring her up here that she's like four pounds lighter did you tell her to bring her up she's like four pounds lighter than Amber and so because of that there's such a difference when you hold them and oh we're gonna stay on for a minute because she's gonna bring her up and then you guys can hear her oh make sure you guys can hear one day here soon. We'll make sure to have him on here soon enough thanks for listening everybody all stay safe that's