When The Likes Fade, The Truth Stays

A seven-hour surgery is one thing. The days after can be the real test, especially when your body reacts, your pain is off the charts, and you’re trying to get medical people to listen while you’re still healing. We share what spinal surgery recovery looks like in our house, why Victoria refused to use a pain pump, and how a “simple” allergy oversight can turn into swelling, skin reactions, and a scary infection concern that sends you looking for a second set of eyes.

Then we get into the part nobody likes to admit: support is easy when it’s public. We read a line that stops us cold, “A woman dies, and 300 people react… The funeral is attended by twelve,” and we talk about what it exposed for us during recovery. We unpack the difference between friends who check in because they care and people who only show up when they want something, plus how to set boundaries without letting cold people change who you are.

The conversation also turns serious as we discuss cyberbullying, teen suicide, and a mother who speaks out and gets sued, raising hard questions about accountability, parenting, and what justice should look like when online cruelty has real-world consequences. We also share a personal win around body dysphoria, scars, and learning to feel safe being seen again, and why we’ll choose peace, love, and laughter over money and appearances every time.

If this hit home, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more people can find the show. What part of the conversation do you want us to go deeper on next?

Transcript

Welcome Back And Website Update

SPEAKER_03 0:02

Howdy y'all. Welcome back to another episode Unstoppable with my wife, my sexy ass wife, Victoria Cure. Author, mother, loving wife, wife. I got the wife part, trust me.

SPEAKER_01 0:16

I want mother and wife to come before author.

SPEAKER_03 0:19

Well, I just Anyway, this is Unstoppable, so you never know what comes across our mouth. Our waves, yes. This is our show, and we just tell it like it is and how we've lived it, and we want y'all to laugh, learn from us, learn with us, grow with us. See, we're just ordinary folk. Well we're we try to be very humble about this. My wife is getting kind of popular out there. If you type in Victoria Cure on Google or Beans, she dominates like the first 24 pages.

SPEAKER_01 0:55

Is it really?

SPEAKER_03 0:56

Yeah. Well, hell, you got 70-something books out there.

SPEAKER_01 0:59

Whatever.

SPEAKER_03 1:00

Anyway. Yeah, so welcome back. Thank you for continuing listening to a contagious smile. And oh, I think I think our you've taken down our website.

SPEAKER_01 1:11

No, I've rebuilt it.

SPEAKER_03 1:13

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:14

And so far, if you still go to contagious smile.com, you'll see it's transitioned. We are doing a whole bunch of really cool new stuff in the next phase of what we do. So it's all new and we're going to be offering a lot of really cool things. And it's kind of like it'll be in like one big house for everything we do in one. So some of it's up there right now and stuff is getting added constantly. Don't look at that part. So I'm working on that.

The Worst Surgery Of My Life

SPEAKER_01 1:48

I do want to apologize to everyone because I am 11 days post-op from spinal surgery. And you know, I think I can say, as an expert, after having over 130, whatever surgeries now, including an amputation, including a removal of an eardrum in its entirety, including like implanted devices, tens units, you name it. Did I mention the amputation? Including all of those, and I don't mean to be funny when I say this. Hands down, this was the worst surgery I've ever been through in my life. Period. Statement, exclamation, drop mic. Like, no shit. Worst flipping surgery ever. I would go through another amputation tenfold over before going through this again.

SPEAKER_03 2:45

And for a certain someone who's probably still following us, I want him to know that my wife was not alone during this surgery. She had her loving husband and her beautiful daughter.

SPEAKER_01 3:01

Y'all are with me at every surgery. Right. But y'all are with me at every surgery. But, and my husband, you know, can confirm or deny, when I was amputated, or I forgot, when I had 26 pieces of metal put in my face, I went home after both surgeries. And now, when I had both my jaws replaced in my face, I went home the same day and I got shingles. I had to deal with all that at the same time, right? This, hands down, 100 times worse. This was the only surgery I've ever been hospitalized for in 20 years. I mean, I was admitted because, and they even gave me a pain pump and said, here. And my husband laughed because it was like the ongoing joke with the whole staff. I was on the surgical floor and I never pushed the button once. No matter how much I wanted to, I refuse because I just I just won't take pain medication. And so they didn't turn me, they didn't move me. It took an hour to swing my legs over the bed. My head, that I love that little boy from Jerry Maguire. The human head weighs eight pounds. Bullshit. The human head weighed 200. And this, I mean, seriously, this has been the worst experience. The surgery was awful. They it was seven hours or something like that, right? And then when I get back to recovery, my blood pressure tanked to 55 over 30. And then they end up giving me dextrose five. And then they're like, You're the doctor said something to my husband and daughter and I about becoming a quadriplegric if I didn't get admitted. And so, of course, I'm like, okay, I'm staying. And then I was on oxygen cannula for 24 hours or whatever it was on a high flow. And nobody ever came in to move me or turn me or sit me up or adjust me in any way. And then they kept coming in and taking my vitals, and they were like, and they were taking labs like around the clock, and they're, oh my god, your glucose is so high. And I and I'm telling them, hello, you just get me dextrose five. Like you just pushed it. Of course, my glucose is gonna be high. And I know we said this on the last podcast, so I won't really go through it all over again, but I don't do versette because I want to be completely coherent in the OR for the timeout. And I went in for the timeout, and I want to make sure that they know of my allergies. And I heard them state my allergies, I reconfirmed my allergies, and damned if they didn't put several of my allergies all over my back. And my husband, I'm fine with it, trying to explain. I look like railroad tracks, like choo-choo tracks, because they started at the nape of my neck, and you can feel this huge bulge. Keep it clean, Michael.

SPEAKER_03 5:52

Keeping it clean. I'm thinking about the caboose right now.

SPEAKER_01 5:55

You are not right. Um, there's a huge, there's a bunch of swelling, and then this like what do you call it? Like, there's a huge swelling on both sides of my neck, and then this like pocket, if you will, and you can feel the hardware in there, and then there's a long scar, and then like a V-shaped scar after that, and then the hole, and then on the right above my right hip, they went over there and put the device in, which is protruding underneath the skin, and you can see that too. And they put all the stuff I'm allergic to on it, like they cleansed the field, as they called it, with the wipes that I'm allergic to. Then they put the stuff on it I'm allergic to, and then they bandaged me up with what I'm allergic to. And so my husband, and I thank you again, and daughter, who have been just amazing, has had to like help me with this. I've called the surgeon's office and they're like, Oh, send us pictures. I already did, and they're like, Oh, he won't see you until you're post up. And that's three weeks later, which is insane. And I ended up going to the ER just to have another set of eyes on it. And the ER doctor's like, Holy crap, this is a really bad infection from them dressing you after surgery. I mean, my back felt like what do you want to call it? Like a like alligator, because it was all like what do you call it? Bumps and say something. Like, it was gross. It was gross.

SPEAKER_03 7:24

You you're my wife, you're not gross.

SPEAKER_01 7:26

Okay, but it was gross. Like all the heat rash and and flame stuff. Anyway, so yeah, this has been the worst.

SPEAKER_03 7:36

I'm a little distracted over y'all because I'm reading the article, and I would like to read just a snippet if I may.

SPEAKER_01 7:42

Sure, that's surprising.

SPEAKER_03 7:44

This article is written by Victoria Cure.

SPEAKER_01 7:46

Can't you just say my wife?

SPEAKER_03 7:48

My wife. Just my wife? Just my wife. Is that what you want to say? My wife. This was written just by my wife. Okay.

unknown 7:57

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 7:58

Is that better? Sure. Okay. Thank you. It was distributed out in a magazine called what now? What was the magazine?

SPEAKER_01 8:05

I write for like four magazines. So I don't think it's a good one. All those at the top? No, I write for like four different magazines, so I don't know which one this is.

SPEAKER_03 8:12

Anyway, I just want to read a small part

Online Sympathy Versus Real Care

SPEAKER_03 8:14

here. And this this is the part I want to read. A woman dies, and 300 people react to the post. 27 people leave comments, hundreds more share prayers, hearts, and broken heart emojis. The funeral is attended by twelve. Let that sink in. Now my wife wrote this before we went into the surgery, before she had this surgery. And during the surgery and even days after, I don't I don't do social. I I I only care about my wife. I I will attend my wife, I will take care of her. I I can give two flipping fingers about any social crap. Okay? So if if y'all are out there wondering what the heck is going on, thank you for caring. It's my fault I didn't post, but that's the way I I my wife comes first, okay? Not social media. But there were very, very few, and I'm talking probably a handful and and a finger or two left over, that actually called my wife, checked up on her every day, or hell, even once a week. Well, it's only been 11 days, so but and to think that we have 40 plus million followers out there, and how many so-called friends? Those of y'all who who actually reached out to me or my wife or to both of us, or even faith.

SPEAKER_01 9:48

Some reached out to faith.

SPEAKER_03 9:50

I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Thank you. It shows you're genuine, it shows you can you you really care. Okay? And you didn't ask for anything in return. Because my wife gives her heart. She gives everything for this this company, this cause, what she believes in. She will help others, she will go above and beyond to help you out. And those of y'all who ask about her and not what you can get from her, again, thank you.

SPEAKER_01 10:18

Because we were getting messages like, you know, hey, I know you just had spinal surgery, can you do this? Hey, I know you just had surgery, can you do this? You know, and and it I understand how people do that. Because some people are just so it's all about them, like, you know, what can you do for me? And if you can't to help with you. I mean, seriously, like, oh, are you out of surgery yet? I really need your help. Can you do this? Like, you know, and it is part of it my fault because I come home and work after surgery. Is part of it well, and that's just the thing, is it's like, you know, how hard is it to send a simple message that says, hey, I was thinking about you, you know, how did everything go? You know, even if they did something like that, even if somebody said, Hey, I was just thinking about you, how did everything go? And then leave it blank for even 60 seconds. By the way, can you do this? No, it was all and none of it was how are you, how did surgery go? It was all, hey, I know you just had surgery. I need you to help me with this. I need you to help me do this. You know, that's what it was. And I probably got 30 of those. And it really devastated me because, you know, I've made myself available and gone and helped people, and you know, where I've been, you know, on scene where there's domestics and stuff at midnight. I've been at hospitals with kids helping them at 11 o'clock at night, you know, and all sorts of other things, going to court and testifying and being a witness and yada yada. And and I've I thought I was still friends with all these people, and not a single solitary word, you know, and it's just dumbfounding. And then, like out of nowhere, the audacity, we get a little notification that we get in the mail with audacity asking for something that just dumbfounded the both of us, and it's like that's a lot of freaking nerve. I mean, really and truly, it's a lot of nerve. And I always tell Faith, and I'm so serious about this, because she's had people do it to her. And the thing is, is I tell people all the time, here's the here's the catch. If you change people, if you change yourself, because people are cold, heartless, and just rude as hell, and you change because of them, the real small quality group of friends and family that you do have, you get the revised version that's not really you. They get the version that somebody else made you turn into because of how nasty they are. Misery loves company. So are you gonna let them win yet again? Or are you just gonna say to hell with them? Because you know, it's like with a narcissist, and you're the black sheep, for instance. Like my bio family, they didn't get mad at me because I wouldn't lie about them. They got mad at me because I told the truth about them. There's a big damn difference. I mean, big damn difference. You can't dispute evidence, you can't dispute a photograph, you can't dispute a text message, you can't dispute an email. But because the truth is told and it projects them in another light, they get furious with you, they take it out on you because you brought their you brought the truth to light and in turn made them look again horrible when they're supposed to be this like you know grand poobah of of righteousness, which they're not. So I want to talk just for a second about a couple of things.

Bullying, Suicide, And A Gag Order

SPEAKER_01 13:58

I found a post about a gorgeous girl. I mean, babe, this this girl, she was 13 years old, middle school, just absolutely stunning young lady. 13 years old, and she was bullied every single day by a group of girls. Okay. And this beautiful girl who was bullied every single day, she's 13, committed suicide. She killed herself. Absolutely gorgeous girl. So much going for her. But what she also didn't understand is that these girls that were bullying her, they were jealous. They were bullying her because they were jealous. So the mom takes it to social media because she was being bullied. Her daughter was being bullied on social media. Her mom takes it to social media and says, My daughter has taken her life due to all of these posts that were written about my daughter. Here they are, right? These girls made my daughter take her own life. I think the mom has an absolute valid point and a case. Why couldn't she go after them? You know, for criminal charges. They made her take her life, you know. I mean, she would never have done that and she would have been here today had she not been bullied by these four girls. So the mom of the little girl, the mom of the young lady who took her life, puts it out on social media, right? And then one of the dads of the girls that was bullying sues the mom of the girl who committed suicide for defamation of character on posts that were created by the child who inflicted this on the girl and took her to court about how they should this woman should not be able to put on social media these things about his children, even though it's what made her daughter lose her life.

SPEAKER_03 15:59

Right.

SPEAKER_01 16:01

And so she's not allowed to talk about her side of the story, even though this girl lost her life in September of 2023 because of it. And I absolutely do not think that is fair. She was told by the court that all her platforms had to be taken down. All her platforms had to come down. But where was the justice for the daughter? Yep.

SPEAKER_03 16:25

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 16:26

Where was the justice for the daughter when all of this was going on? She was told she could not speak about her daughter's passing through social media. That's her right there on the picture.

SPEAKER_03 16:37

So she saw she it's like an NDA.

SPEAKER_01 16:40

Right.

SPEAKER_03 16:41

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 16:42

She can't do anything about it. She was 13, she had her whole life ahead of her, and it was cut short because of bullying. And that's not fair. Now the mom can't do anything to help prevent this anywhere else. I believe that the four girls should have been brought up on charges.

SPEAKER_03 17:03

I think she should go to Congress and get a law passed about this.

SPEAKER_01 17:06

And have it in her daughter's name, absolutely. But I mean, don't you think that the four girls should have been criminally charged?

SPEAKER_03 17:18

She looks about what, 16? Okay.

SPEAKER_01 17:21

But I mean, think about it.

SPEAKER_03 17:23

If you so then that would also go back to the parents, right, monitoring the kid's social media.

SPEAKER_01 17:29

Right. If you go and commit a crime, they basically killed her and made her go and take her own life. She was fine until she started getting bullied. They basically put the way she committed suicide in her hand. And I think they should be charged. As adults, too. Because you want to, you know, I mean, it's not okay. And I think our laws are very unfair. And I think this is

Launching Somebody Has To Say It

SPEAKER_01 17:56

very unfair. And, you know, I'm really looking forward to because I think, and be very careful, my dear sweet husband, love of my life, because tomorrow, well, this is going to be launched today. So you guys will hear this today, and you will see that as of tomorrow, we have a brand new show coming on. And this is gonna be so much fun because when I tell you about this, you're literally going to be like, wait, what? So, as all of you know, and you all know about my partnership with Mike Magniak. And we do this is what it takes, and he has holding it together. We are doing a new podcast, Mike and I are starting tomorrow or today, because this will be released. Babe, it's called Somebody Has to Say It. And Mike and I are going to be debating topics of things that annoy him. Listen to my sweet puppy. So we are gonna be talking about all sorts of different discussions, and we are going to be debating. And I've even told Mike that I captain the debate team and I'm very good at debating, and he's like, Well, I'm a lawyer, and yada yada yada. And I even said we need to have an understanding that at the end of the day we're still friends because babe, I don't know what or how you want to say it, but you know it's gonna get it's gonna get intense. Him and I debating on any and all topics, it's gonna get intense.

SPEAKER_03 19:44

So it's gonna be great to listen to. What I love about you is I won't back down. You won't scream and yell. No, he will, he'll get hot and heated. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:55

Oh, he's gonna get so hot and heated.

SPEAKER_03 19:56

And that's what I that's what's gonna be so joke funny.

SPEAKER_01 19:59

And it's on video, it will be video, but see, I don't raise my voice, I don't scream, and he gets he he's gonna get heated, and he he swears up and down, babe, he can take me in a debate. Okay, have at it, Hoss. He swears up and down he can take me in a debate. He he says he can lawyer me all day long, and I said, Okay, that's great.

SPEAKER_03 20:25

Wait, didn't you take classes from Chris Voss?

SPEAKER_01 20:28

I did, and I also have my parents. Chris Moss is the number one FBI negotiator anywhere, and that's not just it. I've always been great at debating and negotiating, but that's just not it. I mean, like, you know, he makes comments and he's gonna try to get under my skin, and I already know that, and you know, it's it we have a great playful banter between us, but he truly believes that we are gonna talk about topics that are gonna get under my skin or his skin, and we're gonna debate it, and it's gonna be great for listeners. I mean, seriously, the listeners are gonna have such a great time listening to this because it's gonna be gloves off. No kidding.

SPEAKER_03 21:14

Can't wait.

SPEAKER_01 21:15

It's gonna be fun because I mean, you're not a betting man, but I mean, I think you would bet on your wife.

SPEAKER_03 21:22

And and when is this taking place?

SPEAKER_01 21:23

We start recording the new podcast tomorrow. It's called Somebody Has to Say It.

SPEAKER_03 21:28

Unfortunately, I have a tool sale to get ready for.

SPEAKER_01 21:33

No, this is gonna be him and I, you know, about things that people do that annoy him or topics I bring up that we need to discuss that he thinks needs a healthy debate. And so, like tomorrow, I'm just gonna let him pick the topic and we'll just go. He has all this time to prepare. So I hope he is. I will have no idea what the topic is until we discuss it. And then we also, because this will go out tomorrow on Thursday. We have a huge announcement and we're going to be live for a QA on Facebook at 5 30 p.m. Eastern Standard Time as well. So we have a big announcement for that. But I'm pretty excited. I love debating. I love negotiating. I am like, let's go. And he's like, oh, take it easy since you're recovering. Yeah, yeah, yeah, blah, blah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Nope. Nope. Let's go. So it's going to be a fun one. Yeah. Okay. My husband debated whether or not he was going to mention anything. And I think we can discuss, as you all know, this is a big deal.

Living With Body Dysphoria

SPEAKER_01 22:39

Yes. And she says the same thing. River and Amber are actively having conversations. As you all know, they're putting their two cents in here. As you all know, I have had and do have extreme body dysphoria. And I've had body dysphoria now for 20 years. And I openly admit to having it. And when I say I have it, I I mean like I don't have it. I always hide myself behind clothes that are too big, like way too big. I have always covered all my scars, even though I know there are signs of being a warrior. I don't show my body because of my body dysphoria. And my husband's like, I want to make such a big deal about this for you because it's so important and so big. So I'm going to shut up and let you say what I've done for the first time in 20 years.

SPEAKER_03 23:41

Well, well, that's an open door.

SPEAKER_01 23:43

Be very careful because you sleep next to me at night, love of my life. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 23:49

So body this for you. It's something I only understand from my point of view. Okay. I I don't understand.

SPEAKER_01 23:56

It's like the shallow hell complex.

SPEAKER_03 23:57

Okay. I will I will come out the house naked. I don't care.

SPEAKER_01 24:01

No, you're not coming out of my house naked.

SPEAKER_03 24:03

Oh, it's your house?

SPEAKER_01 24:04

It is when you talk dumb.

SPEAKER_03 24:06

It's our home.

SPEAKER_01 24:06

Okay, continue. Carry on.

SPEAKER_03 24:09

Not that I don't have things to be ashamed of. Um it's because I don't I really don't care what other people think of me.

SPEAKER_01 24:18

Come on, Fogo, stay.

SPEAKER_03 24:20

Shut up. Only my wife. Right? My wife's opinion matters. So when I tell my wife she is absolutely gorgeous, beautiful, sexy, and I love who she is, how she is, her body just the way she is. Not 30 pounds ago.

SPEAKER_01 24:44

50.

SPEAKER_03 24:45

50. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 24:46

55.

SPEAKER_03 24:48

Right? I lost 50. I loved her just as much when I was plump and juicy. Not a fat joke. Plump and juicy. Than I do now. Okay. She had scars then, she has more scars now. Okay. When I knew her, she had a left arm. She doesn't anymore.

SPEAKER_01 25:05

Had a right eardrum.

SPEAKER_03 25:07

You did.

SPEAKER_01 25:09

That was metal freeze.

SPEAKER_03 25:11

I love her even more. So for her to shuck off these shuck off. Uh huh. That's a hillbilly term. A hillbilly term. Like the shucking corn.

SPEAKER_01 25:23

Okay, pogo, go ahead.

SPEAKER_03 25:25

To shuck off these large, extra large, triple large, five times XL large.

SPEAKER_01 25:31

Five times XL.

SPEAKER_03 25:33

Baggy ass clothes. And to start sporting a tank top. Which I didn't even own. Is is no fat, no fat joke intended, is huge.

SPEAKER_01 25:43

We didn't, I didn't even own. That's a huge bitch. Shut up. I didn't even own a tank top. Like I was like, I'm gonna go get them, I'm gonna try.

SPEAKER_03 25:51

So we we we delved in on a little bit of on this on our last podcast, I think. Or maybe the one before. Guys, if you have a female, if you have a partner, guys or girls, or whatever, however, you identify yourself, if that significant other has body dysphoria, give them their time. Okay? I tried to push my wife. I tried my redneck ways to say everything I could understand and to get her out of those clothes. Of course, I was trying to get in her breeches, but more I was trying to get her out of the clothes.

SPEAKER_01 26:28

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 26:29

So that she would feel better, so that she would release this baggage, this weight that she'd been carrying around. Right? Because that that individual that well, it wasn't just one.

SPEAKER_01 26:43

No, I had my screen donor that would have been like, here's a sharpie marker. Why don't you go connect all your scars? It'll take you all night. Here, that'll give you something to do. Like, it wouldn't matter. I told my husband this, it wouldn't matter if I had like the best rocking hard body, defined arms, like chiseled perfection everywhere. Like, first of all, no one has that. But if I did, which I did not, I would still get the oh wow, look at that scar. Oh wow, look at that one. Wow, there's another, there's another. I mean, I got I got told you look like Freddie Kruger and the elephant man had a baby. I got told, wow, before that, you used to turn heads. Now you turn stomachs. These were comments that I was told by my sperm donor and egg donor. These are comments made to me.

SPEAKER_03 27:31

And I and and I know you and your memory. Those were verbatim. Yes. Yes? Yes. Okay, folks, y'all heard right then. That's confirmation that words go on a lot longer than the scars.

SPEAKER_01 27:46

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_03 27:47

Right? She's she has the scars, but she remembered verbatim, those herful words.

SPEAKER_01 27:55

I remember being told at nine years old that my egg donor was she had miscarried me. I mean, these are words that stay with you forever. And that's why I'm so cautious when I say anything. I think before I speak, because like Faith has said, Mom, you've never said anything that I go back and think and think, wow, that was hurtful. Like if she did something wrong, I'd be like, I love you. I'm always so proud of you. I don't like the choice you just made. Let's talk about it. And so she knew that I still loved her. I wasn't critiquing or criticizing her. I was telling her the choice that she made was not the right one. And let's sit down and talk about it. Because I, again, like I always say, I don't want faith or anyone having to spend their adulthood recovering from their childhood. I don't think it should have to be done. And it sucks, and it's not a prison that you want anyone to be in.

SPEAKER_03 28:46

So the fact that she's still wearing a tank top right now is is absolutely wonderful. Y'all, I love it. She she broke out of that shell, and I hope she never falls back into it. Never, ever.

SPEAKER_01 29:00

And I actually slept in uh wearing a tank top, which I've not done in I well, I haven't even owned a tank top in 20 years.

SPEAKER_03 29:09

So this woman has lived through and a handbasket. Hey, it it may take her a little bit longer than most, but guys, girls, give them their time. Okay, have patience with them. It will it will it will pay off. I absolutely love it.

SPEAKER_01 29:31

What do you love about it?

SPEAKER_03 29:32

I've got to see more of my wife than I have in years. I don't love it.

SPEAKER_01 29:38

Your dog's taking a crap on the floor.

SPEAKER_03 29:40

I've asked my daughter several times.

SPEAKER_01 29:42

She's busy doing something.

SPEAKER_03 29:44

I don't know what.

SPEAKER_01 29:45

I do, but I can't tell you. And it's a puppy that's taking a crap on the floor.

SPEAKER_03 29:50

I asked her to let the dogs out.

SPEAKER_01 29:52

Who let that dog out? Oh, that's a toy. These good dogs. Dogs are so great. I love our babies. Boys, I mean with four watchdogs. That's crazy crazy.

SPEAKER_00 30:06

Crazy. So crickets.

Family Fallout And Legal Stress

SPEAKER_00 30:14

So you're having a tool sale?

SPEAKER_03 30:16

What it what do you Yeah, I I've got a lot of tools to sell. I know most guys will not sell their tools, but I have I have a plethora of tools that were not mine. That were left even with an abandoned property. And I feel like getting rid of them because I don't want them. I don't want the negative energy. I I just I just don't want them.

SPEAKER_01 30:38

Is that hard for you?

SPEAKER_03 30:40

Ha ha ha ha. What? Oh, that's not a sexual joke?

SPEAKER_01 30:46

No.

SPEAKER_03 30:46

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 30:46

Pogo stick, it's not. Shut up. It's not.

SPEAKER_03 30:51

I'm being our listeners don't, they're not gonna want to think. Yes, they do.

SPEAKER_01 30:56

I'm being serious. Like, is it hard for you?

SPEAKER_03 30:58

Will you stop saying that?

SPEAKER_01 31:00

I'm asking you a question. Is it difficult for you to see things that no, it's not.

SPEAKER_03 31:09

And once we get into that legal issue, we'll we'll put it on air too, just like we did last time.

SPEAKER_01 31:18

Well, we received a letter, we already got that, asking for documentation that we don't have. And it's like we've heard nothing from your sperm donor for seven months, and like we're not doing defamation of character. The last thing we knew, he was what do you want to call it?

SPEAKER_03 31:44

Like, he was the last word I got, he was being transported, or he was gonna be transported.

SPEAKER_01 31:49

He was residential in a mental institution.

SPEAKER_03 31:51

That's all I know.

SPEAKER_01 31:52

He was he was going to be transferred, and then he said that we were all dead to him.

SPEAKER_03 31:58

No, and how how how do how does a father say that to their child? Okay, I I can understand if let's say let's say one of our ch children, okay, was so strung out on dope and and all the help, and God knows we would help them to the ends of the earth. Right. Yeah, we we would we would go to meetings, we would pay whatever whatever facility, yeah. We we walk them to school, we walk them to the job, whatever. They'd be in our house, 24 hour care, whatever. Right. And and the little SOB still would go out there and do drugs, not wanting to help themselves. That I can understand. Hey, I've tried to help you, boy or girl. I'm washing my hands of you.

unknown 32:52

Right?

SPEAKER_03 32:52

So many people are saying, I can understand that, but to but to say, hey son, I know you you you and your wife tried to help me. I know you sent me to all these doctors, you've got all this care for me. I know you've rearranged your life. You you lost your job for me. You you've you rearranged your home, you did all this construction work to make accommodations for me.

SPEAKER_00 33:13

Get rid of my car because you couldn't get in it and get a new car.

SPEAKER_03 33:16

All this, and I'm not saying thank you because you're dead to me. Right. You took away my medication, you took away my dope. Understand you took away my my opioids.

SPEAKER_01 33:27

Under doctor's orders.

SPEAKER_03 33:28

How does a uh a father say that to their child? You were dead to me.

SPEAKER_01 33:33

Not just that, but then you're not honest about like you know, the fact you're a felon or the fact that you were asked if you had firearms, and then you kept a loaded firearm in the chair where you were sitting, knowing of our daughter, you know, knowing of our dogs, and you'd already overdosed before that, and it's all documented in records. I mean, you like if you go to if you call a doctor right now, they'll say, Oh, the first available appointment we have for you is whenever. Like, for instance, he wanted pain management, and we called pain management as a new employee, a new patient. They said, Oh, we can get you in in like eight months. I mean, seriously, eight months, and you're having pain, and you're supposed to wait eight months. I called because this is what I do and I advocate, and I got him in within a couple of weeks, and we had doctors, remember, that said we couldn't even call doctor the doctor and get in that fast. That is what one of the doctors told him, and he had everything checked from head to literally podiatry, everything, and in between, and everything was done. I mean, like we had three ER visits in the first week, and I we were tending to him left, right, and center. Yeah, and then he turns around. I mean, he had everything he wanted, and then some we had contractors already come out and work on our home because we were having to rebuild everything for him. We had to like literally turn everything around to accommodate his needs, and we didn't even say a word. My husband lost his job because of the fact that he was at his bedside sitting in one of the worst seat little chair things for days with his dad after what seemed to be like the eighth or ninth hospital ER trip in a matter of a few weeks, and he lost his job. Not to mention that you know, I couldn't lift him into a vehicle by myself. He's 330, 340 pounds, and I have one arm. I couldn't lift him up by myself and get him in the seat, and then his wheelchair is motorized, and that was over 170 pounds, and I couldn't lift up my myself with one arm, you know, and so yes, I needed my husband to help me, but my husband lost his job because of him trying to take care of you know his sperm donor. And then we got blamed for him being put into a facility when it was the law enforcement officer who put on record in the medical report, we as law enforcement officers made the decision to 1013. And then on top of it, at the hospital, the hospital, after doing an evaluation, chose to impatient him. We didn't, and and I don't understand that. You know, people go back and go, Oh my god, how could you do that to your parent? But how about going to the parent and say, How the hell can you do that to your kid?

SPEAKER_03 36:41

Now, this parent was on multiple opioids, even some that were not his. He was taking medication that didn't belong to him, and he was talking about suicide, knowing he had three firearms within his control that we didn't know about so that were loaded. You uh you you you blame me for calling the paramedics down one out there to my home? No, that's what any loving family member should do for a loved one, okay, at the time.

SPEAKER_01 37:15

You were the one to call the police. He blame he thought I did. He got mad at me, and that that call I you made.

SPEAKER_03 37:23

I mean he kept because we genuinely wanted him to receive help.

SPEAKER_01 37:26

Yeah, and he kept all of his medicine in locked boxes, and it was and that's just the thing, is the medicine in the locked boxes were because they were in they were other people's prescriptions. He was taking his deceased, let's make sure we do this correctly, ex-wife's medication, even though we later found out that he was claiming they were still married.

TV Tangents And Bond Debates

SPEAKER_01 37:50

I mean, you talk about a Jerry Springer Roundup.

SPEAKER_03 37:54

Does he still do shows?

SPEAKER_01 37:55

Jerry Springer died. Oh well shit. I didn't I guess he's not doing them anymore at all.

SPEAKER_03 38:01

Y'all don't tell her I don't watch TV.

SPEAKER_01 38:03

You do too watch TV. You just watch some nasty crap.

SPEAKER_03 38:06

No, yeah. I was done there watching Avatar.

SPEAKER_00 38:10

You just watched Poltergeist with Faith and she loved it. I can't believe it. 1985? Half the people from that movie died after it was made.

SPEAKER_03 38:18

Ethan uh, what's her name? Heather O'Rourke, is it? I don't know. Carolyn?

SPEAKER_01 38:24

I I never saw it.

SPEAKER_03 38:26

Oh, we gotta go watch it. No, thank you. Oh, yes.

SPEAKER_01 38:28

I don't have time to watch that.

SPEAKER_03 38:30

You have time. We're stuck. Okay, thank you for listening.

SPEAKER_01 38:32

I'm not watching it because I can't get that time back in my life. I don't enjoy this type of movie. Family time. Okay, then let's watch a family movie. And that is not that's a great show. And they listen to our show, they support our show. Hi Abigail. Yeah, she's awesome. She's coming back on.

SPEAKER_03 38:50

You know Tom on here.

SPEAKER_01 38:52

Tom is like 81 now.

SPEAKER_03 38:54

I don't care. He's got a very distinct voice. Everybody would know him.

SPEAKER_01 38:57

I ran into him at Perimeter Mall in Atlanta, Georgia. No, he actually ran into me coming out of Macy's.

SPEAKER_03 39:04

He's a big guy.

SPEAKER_01 39:05

He's a big guy. I was little, I was a teen. I I just remember the mustache, and he always used to raise his eyebrows on Magna PI.

SPEAKER_03 39:12

You were a teen. Oh, yeah. I was gonna say Magma PI back then, if you were a teen.

SPEAKER_01 39:16

And he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt, which I think that's the reason why I hated him with Hawaiian shirts for so long. He was hairy. Holy shit. He was cool looking back then. I never thought he was. I think he's more distinguished now than he was back then. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 39:28

Shaking not stood.

SPEAKER_01 39:29

I was just gonna say, we're always on the same page. Sean Connery was a delicious dessert before he passed. Were you my wife? Yes, but like in the movies, like that he played with Catherine Zeta Jones and all in Trapman or whatever. That man was so much better looking than when he was James Bond. He aged so well, like a fine wine. That was a very distinguished-looking gentleman for his time when he was older. Tom Selleck looks to me looks better now than he did when he was Magnum P.I. back in the day. All right, let's see. Who's the best? Who do you think was the best 007? You better be very careful. I will fight this to the tooth and nail.

SPEAKER_03 40:11

Really?

SPEAKER_01 40:11

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 40:11

Now see, my first 007 was Roger Moore.

SPEAKER_01 40:14

Well, I knew you were gonna say Roger Moore. I knew it. But who do you think was the best?

SPEAKER_03 40:18

Oh the best?

SPEAKER_01 40:21

I have not seen any of the 007s since what's that guy's name? He's married to Rachel Weiss. Like the I can't think of his name.

SPEAKER_03 40:31

I have no clue.

SPEAKER_01 40:32

I haven't seen any since oh my gosh. What is that guy's name? Okay, who do you think was the best 007? I'm gonna look it up because I can't think of who that guy is.

SPEAKER_03 40:46

I I I'm sorry, I don't know celebrity names like you do. I'm I'm gonna just stick with Roger Moore. Why would you pick him? Just because that's what I grew up with. He only did like a couple. No.

SPEAKER_01 40:59

Yes, he did. Alexa, how many people played 007, James Bond?

SPEAKER_02 41:12

Seven actors have played James Bond in the official film series.

SPEAKER_01 41:16

Okay. Alexa, how many 007 movies did Roger Moore play?

SPEAKER_02 41:24

Roger Moore played James Bond in seven movies.

SPEAKER_01 41:27

Yeah, okay, so he did seven. I haven't seen any. Okay, I haven't seen any of them.

SPEAKER_03 41:33

You're gonna say Sean Connery.

SPEAKER_01 41:35

I never watched any of Daniel Craig's. Daniel Craig was good. I haven't watched any of those. I haven't seen like a bunch of them. No, hands down, no question. Shaking stud all day long. It's Mr. Sean Connery. Timothy Dalton, Roger Moore, any of those other who has they were warm in the seat for Mr. Connery to come take the rein. Sorry. Nobody else can do 007 like Sean Connery.

SPEAKER_03 42:02

How did we get on this subject? Oh, because I meant you made the blue bloods.

SPEAKER_01 42:08

But I'm just saying, like nobody, nobody could do we were so distinguished. Some people look better older than they do when they were younger.

SPEAKER_03 42:19

This guy ain't one of them.

SPEAKER_01 42:20

Yes, you do. You're hot, my little pogo stick.

SPEAKER_03 42:23

Okay there.

SPEAKER_01 42:25

You are. You're smoking.

SPEAKER_03 42:27

Paris.

SPEAKER_01 42:28

She's disgusting.

SPEAKER_03 42:31

You said you're hot.

SPEAKER_01 42:33

You're a good-looking individual.

SPEAKER_03 42:35

I just wrote on the back of my head with this pen.

SPEAKER_01 42:37

Well, that doesn't make you the sharpest carrot in the container.

SPEAKER_03 42:42

Anyway. So once again, thank you for caring. Karen get it. Karen about my wife and her health and asking how she was is. We appreciate all you all y'all folks.

SPEAKER_01 42:57

Yeah, I've even been without makeup for the first time in like 20 years. You don't need it. Yes, I do. Don't say, why are you wearing that whale flat?

SPEAKER_03 43:06

Flat?

SPEAKER_00 43:07

Fat.

SPEAKER_03 43:08

I don't know if makeup's still made out of whale blubber. It used to be.

SPEAKER_01 43:11

Did not. Alexa, did makeup used to get made by whale blubber? No.

SPEAKER_02 43:19

Actually, whale blubber isn't used in modern makeup. Historically, a wax called spermaceti from sperm whales was used in cosmetics, but it's been replaced by plant-based and synthetic alternatives for decades.

SPEAKER_03 43:32

Okay, it just said it's been modern makeup. It just said it's been replaced for decades.

SPEAKER_01 43:38

For decades. I've only been wearing makeup for decades. So I didn't wear any of it. And I only use plant based stuff.

SPEAKER_03 43:45

You didn't wear makeup back in your teens?

SPEAKER_01 43:47

No.

SPEAKER_03 43:48

Really?

SPEAKER_01 43:48

No, because my grandmother never wore makeup. She just wore like powder.

SPEAKER_03 43:51

Your grandma was pretty.

SPEAKER_01 43:53

My grandmother was gorgeous. I mean, like 80 something years old, she wasn't. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 44:00

Because I think we're being haunted.

SPEAKER_01 44:02

That's not haunting that they're watching over us. And no, she was flawless. Like even in her 80s, she was so put together and so classy and just put together. And my grandfather was like Sean Connery. He was so distinguished and so handsome. He looked like Sean Connery.

The Grandfather Who Modeled Love

SPEAKER_01 44:19

He really did. He looked like he did, yeah. He did. He looked like Sean Connery, you know. But I think my grandfather was better looking. Just saying. But he he was very distinguished. My grandfather was my first little crush, you know, because he he was such a gentleman to me and always made me feel safe and loved and and you know, like just protected and like safe. I mean, I know I just said that, but he really made me feel safe and loved unconditionally. And that's something a dad is supposed to show. You know, your daughter, a daughter is supposed to have her dad as just their first true love, right? And they're supposed to learn from the dad how to be treated by a man, how a man is supposed to interact with a woman, what is and is not okay, opening the doors, like every door he opened, every chair he pulled out. He always ordered for her. You know, look at my beautiful bride. I have never, ever, ever heard them fight, never heard them fight. And, you know, it was always holding hands and so sweet and loving. And if they fought, it was behind closed doors and I didn't know of it ever. And it was just, you know, like he had to have heart surgery. And I remember the doctor, you know, saying you need to have heart surgery on Tuesday or whatever it was. And he was like, Well, obviously, I don't need to do it this weekend because you're not admitting me, so it's not urgent. And he was like, I have a 5:30 or 6:30 tea off time with my grandbaby, so we can do it Wednesday. And that's what he told him. He said, if it's not, you know, imperative that I'm in the hospital right now, because you're not admitting me right now, and you're saying I can wait till Tuesday, I can wait till Wednesday, I have a golf tea time with my daughter, my grandbaby. And we went and did golf. I mean, and that's how he was. And like I remember eight years old, he coded, and I see the doctor come flying down the hall. And they'd already put me in the hall sitting at the door, and he comes up to me and taps me on the head and says, He's just taking a nap. And he runs in there and he's doing everything he's doing. And I'm as calm as can be. My grandmother is not, I am. I get back in there after what seems like forever, and he apologized for taking a nap. And he was just like, you know, he winked at me, and I had no idea back then what that was. I didn't know what coding meant. I just saw everybody running in with equipment and code blue, and I had no idea what it was.

SPEAKER_03 46:41

Oh, it was different back then.

SPEAKER_01 46:42

Yeah, it was so different. You had a crash cart, you had everything, right? And like everything stopped, and everybody runs, and you know, and and you're you're they have a cell phone on their hand. That's not a block, it looked like a block, right? But I kept looking in the door and I'm like watching everybody on top of him. And he was a big, husky guy, like not fat at all. He was in shape. And I'm just looking at him like, what are y'all doing to my grandfather? You know, and he would tell everybody, because he was in the ICU after heart surgery or whatever, you have to be 12 to be on the floor. And he would say, Oh, her biological mom's a midget. She's very conscious about her height, don't say anything. And he would tell people this, and he would just wink at me. And I would think, Oh, yeah, I'm 12. And he would say, She gets very shy about it and starts laughing because I couldn't lie. So somebody said, How old are you? And I'd say 12, but I'd say, huh? And he's like, She's very uncomfortable. Don't ask her her her age. Her mother's a midget, right? And that's how I stayed on the floor. And I stayed up there with him. And then I would stay with him up there during the day and then go home with my grandmother to her house at night and start it all over again the next day. And that's where I got who I am with Faith, right? Except they wouldn't let my grandmother then stay overnight. And so I went home with her. But whenever Faith was in the hospital, I never went home. I stayed with her because that's how it should be. You know, and there were times where Faith asked in the very small window where her biological grandparents were in the picture, you know, to come stay and see her or spend the night. No, I'm not giving up my bed. Nut chair's too hard, it hurts my back, or you know, I'm contorted in a flipping hospital bed or even in the hospital big crib to be in there with her. You don't hear me complaining my back hurts. That's my daughter. That's your freaking biological granddaughter. You know, people are so selfish, self-centered, self-righteous.

Choosing Peace Over Inheritance

SPEAKER_01 48:34

You know, people asked, and I and I have not prepared this part of the we don't prepare any of our podcasts actually, but is it or is it not true? We walked away from millions of dollars on my side of the family.

SPEAKER_03 48:47

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 48:48

And you know what? I've had people who know my biological say, why would you have done that after everything they did to you? Because that money will never fix the mental anguish that would continue to haunt me to this day, would destroy my my our daughter's self-worth. You know, my husband couldn't bear them as well. I mean, here you go. My my family knew that my husband was my soulmate. I've said it for 20 something years, and everybody knew, but they would talk about me so badly to my husband. And he did say to them, the only thing I want are those two girls. And they live in a mansion, they have a 10,000 square foot house. You know, they wouldn't, I mean, we went years without seeing them. The first time we see them, they're like, come look at our new Mercedes. You know, this is what it costs. It's not what it costs because that's what it costs brand new is zero miles on it, you know, or let me go show you my $300,000 Ralph Lorraine RV. Why can't, you know, why? See, that's where people are so about materialistic. They want to impress you with what they have. But you know what they don't have? They don't have the laughter that we have every single night as a family. We crack up laughing every single night as a family. I mean, every night. They don't have us snuggling up together. I mean, you talk about Antarctica in that room. They one's on one side of the bed, one's on the other, they don't touch each other. Think about it. You've never seen them hold hands, kiss, nothing. I can tell you, I have never seen them affectionate to each other. I can tell you that he's only told her once that he loved her, and he even rolled his eyes when he said it. She was in the emergency room. I took her and he was out with another woman. And he said, just tell her I love her. And it was, you know, on the iPhone. And it was, you know, really, you're with another woman. And I mean, it it it you couldn't pay for enough therapy for me. And you know, I believe that we do so much to help so many people, and it pays forward, and uh, you know, as long as we have a roof over our head and clothes and food and reliable transportation, then we are richer than they are.

SPEAKER_03 51:18

No pun intended there.

SPEAKER_01 51:19

Yeah, so now you can take us out.

SPEAKER_03 51:22

All right.

Recovery Wins And Signing Off

SPEAKER_03 51:24

Well, my wife pooped after all that. Y'all, she she likes to say she's what, just over a week post surgery?

SPEAKER_00 51:33

And today was my first I've been in here.

SPEAKER_03 51:36

And she has really pushed herself today.

SPEAKER_01 51:38

I've been in here 10 hours today.

SPEAKER_03 51:41

Y'all hear that? Sitting in this damn chair for well, no got her up to eat lunch.

SPEAKER_01 51:45

But I didn't even finish my sandwich.

SPEAKER_03 51:47

Brought her lunch.

SPEAKER_01 51:48

Yeah, and I didn't finish my sandwich.

SPEAKER_03 51:49

But other than that, I've been brought the puppies for a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 51:52

In here. I only come down, I try to get up every couple of hours at least to walk so I don't get clots. But I come downstairs three times to get tea. And other than that, I haven't been out of the chair. I even had working dinner. You brought me dinner in the office and I worked through dinner.

SPEAKER_03 52:08

So I did 10 hours. I'm a good house bitch.

SPEAKER_01 52:11

Pogo stick.

SPEAKER_03 52:13

I've done laundry. Post it?

SPEAKER_01 52:15

I said pogo stick.

SPEAKER_03 52:17

Oh shut. Oh my god, woman. Good night, y'all, from a cadet smile unstopped. Till next time.