.png)
The Vision Quest Podcast
A podcast about life, sports, and life in sports! Enjoy!
The Vision Quest Podcast
#108 The Olympic Dreams of Sarah Hildebrandt
Sarah Hildebrandt shares her remarkable journey from a dancer in Indiana to an Olympic gold medalist, discussing the emotional and mental challenges of wrestling. She emphasizes the importance of a supportive environment and intrinsic motivation, explaining how her experiences shaped her resilience and growth as an athlete.
• Transition from dance to wrestling
• Importance of family and community support
• Emotional challenges faced in competition
• Achieving success at national and international levels
• Coping with pressure and fear during the Olympics
• Reflecting on the complex emotions of winning medals
Appleton Tattoo Links
https://www.facebook.com/appletontattoo
https://www.instagram.com/mark_appletontattoo/
920 Hat Co. Links
https://920hatco.com/
https://www.instagram.com/920hatco/
https://www.facebook.com/920HatCo
and we're live. Like I told you, there's like 30 seconds. So this is very exciting and we had an actually pretty exciting time before we even jumped down. Here we are joined with the great, great sarah hildebrand.
Speaker 3:Thank you very much for joining us thank you for having me, despite my almost technical difficulties, uh, leading in my multiple difficulties, not just technical, that was awesome.
Speaker 2:That was awesome. I I had, I had fun just going through that. So this is episode like number 108 or something like that and. But we've been away for a little bit. I've been doing so. I, if you can't tell, I got virginia cavalier stuff on, so I've been doing a little cavalier coverage of of things and and uh duels and everything. But I've been waiting to to get someone, uh, as a guest on. We've had some time in between here, but we finally were able to get in touch with you and get you on. So thank you, sarah, very much for taking the time out to do this. Greatly appreciate it.
Speaker 3:Oh, of course, thanks for having me.
Speaker 2:I'm pumped you bet, so a lot of people listen. This is the premise of the show is all about you. It's not about I throw a little in about you know, maybe something I went through that can relate, kind of thing. But we're talking about you, from the remembering of sports to to now, to you running around for chargers, to now this old woman, oh man you call, you're calling you're, you're calling yourself an old woman and I'm older. I know that. So I'm like an ancient. I'm an ancient man then. So, so, okay, so let's, let's start out from the beginning here. So is it? Is it Granger, indiana, that you're from?
Speaker 3:Granger, Indiana, but I was actually born in Memphis, Tennessee.
Speaker 2:Oh, okay, okay so. So birth records brought you, brought you to Tennessee, but then you guys wound up over in Indiana. Was that before you remember anything? You guys wound up in Indiana, wound up over in indiana. Was that before you remember anything? You guys wound up in indiana? Or did you grow up in tennessee for a?
Speaker 3:little bit. Yeah, no, I was in memphis for a little bit, I can remember that. And then we moved to rono virginia when I was in maybe like first and second grade. Oh okay, yeah, so I can remember, but I was not playing sports at this. Well, I was a dancer.
Speaker 2:Okay, yeah, that's a good start. So dance, was that competitive dance or was it just? You know, we wanted to get our daughter in something and have her do something, kind of thing.
Speaker 3:It started as that and then it was getting competitive and I loved it. I danced for a long time, actually, once we moved to Indiana, even I was dancing, still danced for a long time. Actually, once we moved to indiana, even I was dancing still so um I would say I danced for maybe about 10 years. Okay, yeah, oh, my god, it was the best ballet, tap, jazz, the whole thing was that okay?
Speaker 2:so we started out in dance and did you wind up? Like you know how some kids are, we'll say, like a boy is like football, soccer, baseball, that kind of thing. Were you doing dance? Were you doing volleyball? Were you other other sports included with that in that time frame?
Speaker 3:yeah, so pre-indiana time, I suppose, yeah, yeah, mostly danced and then I tried playing soccer. But get this, okay, I was so afraid my the coach had to hold my hand and run up and down the field holding my hand. My parents would pay me if I just touched the ball because I would like run away from the ball. So I would get five dollars for, like, literally just touch it. Like most kids got five dollars for scoring.
Speaker 3:No, I got five dollars for touching the ball wow and I don't think I made any money, so so I enjoy.
Speaker 2:I enjoy kids, like you. So I I did have a kid, but when I first started coaching, deathly afraid of the ball, just deathly afraid of it, right, and no no one. I don't know what happened to him before he ever got to soccer. So I don't know if, like his friends, threw the ball at him or something, yeah, right. But he got to the point and this is where coach, where I really started to think I really enjoy coaching. But I mean by the end of the season I had it to where a ball would go up in the air and he would go for it, right. So you're, you're like my guy, you're that, you're my kid, that I would run after. You're the girl. I'd be like, hey, come here, I'm gonna show you something. This sport's awesome. Yeah, yes, so that's awesome. Yeah, yes, so that's awesome. So soccer was a part of it. I love that. What part of dance? Do you think that helped you a lot as far as some of the stuff that you learned as a young girl growing up from dance taking into wrestling?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean there's a lot of discipline required in ballet dance in general. There's a lot of discipline required in ballet dance in general. And so from a very young age, I was used to a training dynamic that was very serious and very disciplined. And I'm not saying that's necessarily a good thing, Sure, but I had exposure to it that I think, helped me later on down the line.
Speaker 3:I never had a problem being serious and disciplined. I needed to learn the playful side of sport, and so maybe that is from my ballerina roots, which is a very strict and serious dynamic.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yes, it is, yeah. So you got you. You were immersed I guess immersed is the is the word into structure, structure of sports, with the structure then and and obviously you're kind of dabbling in other little, you know your parents putting you in other sports. When did wrestling come into the picture? Is that pre-indiana still?
Speaker 3:no, yeah, wrestling didn't come in until I was in seventh grade. So in indiana, and at that I was just getting done with dancing, um, I was playing soccer and I was actually not afraid of the ball anymore. So I did all through high school like soccer stuck with me, um. So I was playing soccer, I was playing tennis, I was swimming which horrible swimmer, I was the worst swimmer.
Speaker 3:Oh my god I was qualified every, every single meet and it was so funny because it was like they like announce it on like the lane, so I would be like swimming and I'd get so tired that I'd start doggy paddling and I just feel like disqualification, lane four, and I'm like humiliating it's humiliating, but I was like is it really lost if I'm like I'm not drowning?
Speaker 2:so yeah, winner here, yeah what are you guys really pointing out? That I'm surviving?
Speaker 3:I'm still floating, so I'm doing something, right, that's awesome, that's awesome.
Speaker 2:So, so with with the entrance of wrestling, I guess the the next question I, before we get into it too much, is being that you're already in like I like we said structured sports things like that how were, how were your parents already like? I always ask everybody like, what was your support system like? What was, how were your parents like? Because, like with christina and I I'm the sports guy, christina's the educator side, right, she handles the schooling, I handle the sports side.
Speaker 2:I kind of drove li Liam a little bit not I wouldn't say too hard, when he was little. We got I almost got to that point, right, but but I was the, I was the driving force behind discipline and doing this. So you got to do it, you got to make sure you're doing this right. But I also came from a side of I played, you know, semi-pro sports and it was. It wasn't easy right away. So I understood that there's certain things you have to go through while still slipping up as a parent, right, how was that for you? And what was that dynamic like for you with with mom and dad and things like that?
Speaker 3:Yeah, so, um, my dad was a really talented athlete growing up himself, so he also had experience through that. Um, and then on top of that, that, my brothers were already involved in wrestling. So there were, they were familiar with wrestling and just being a parent in the wrestling world already yeah familiar with being a parent to a girl wrestler on an all boys team.
Speaker 3:That was probably something new. But they were so, um, you know, they, they never pushed me into anything. I had to ask them to go to practice every practice, like they weren't like it's time to go to practice. It's like every day. I'd be like well, you tried me to practice, and so it always had to come from me. And then I did a lot of extra training so I would wake up early in the morning. I had to be the one to go downstairs. I had to wake my parents up If I wanted to go wrestle on the weekends at weekend tournaments. They're like you need to ask us to go there. So it was never them forcing anything, okay, something like I would be like no, I'm not wrestling this weekend, it's my choice. And they would be like I'm not mad, but I'm disappointed and I'm like, oh fine, I'll wrestle this weekend. So there was a little bit of that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah and so and that's kind of the and I guess I never really pointed it out too much before, but I'm really starting to take note and seeing that kids that had high level athletic parents, right, like it was part of their parents life already and maybe their parents went through the harshness of a parent being like you have to do this and why didn't you win by this much, and stuff like that, where parents and again, I slipped up a little bit as a parent, no matter what, but I'm noticing that all these you included all the athletes that have high level athlete parents, have a different perspective and were brought up a little differently through the sport, right, because of that struggle, because of some of that structure, that maybe some kids aren't shown properly, right, you know, like the parent that is telling, telling. So I, I'm always intrigued by that, especially with the support system, because sometimes there's one that does something and sometimes there's one that's the opposite, right, they were always on the same page with that.
Speaker 2:And that's. That's awesome and obviously so I. I I almost want to expound on that because it gives that kid, that athlete, a level of a whole different perspective of just competing in general right and things in discipline and how, how well you're practicing and are you paying attention? It's those things Whereas a parent that is nowadays that is as new to sports, like maybe their kid is finally in sports, where they're the ones that are like why aren't you? You know you only, you're only doing this much, you only won like this and I. It's just very interesting, especially now with the way that sports are with kids, you know.
Speaker 3:And then they start younger and younger and they become single sport athletes sooner. And I've been like. I feel like and this was absolutely the case with my parents was always, you know, it had to come from me and effort was the biggest thing. I never, ever felt pushed to win or succeed because of them, it was always an intrinsic thing and the effort was what they cared most about and I promise you that stayed consistent my whole career. So that was just like oh, they're kids, it's winning's not important, like wrestling for an Olympic title, and it was like oh, you know, it's not about winning. And that's why I was capable to do something of that magnitude, because of the freedom that this isn't about winning.
Speaker 2:Yep, Yep. So that even spells out even more going into wrestling then. So when you started wrestling you mentioned you were on an all boys team, things like that. But when you started in middle school, what was your first impression when you started wrestling?
Speaker 3:You know, I had no idea what to expect. It was just something that looked fun and I was like I want to try that. I think I um by no fault of anyone's. No one just expected me to be good.
Speaker 3:It was like you're a girl, you know you're not don't get pinned, and so the expectation was so low I could just kind of have fun. Um, you know you're not, don't get pinned, and so the expectation was so low, I could just kind of have fun. You know, there was a little bit of like I don't know how people are going to react to this, or you know, I was kind of like prepped, like you know people might be mean to you and kind of like getting ready for something like that. But I think mostly, basically, what had happened how I joined the team was they didn't have someone small enough to fill the 65 pound weight class for 70, and I was like 65 pounds. So I was like bro, I'll just you know they were like, as long as we don't have to give up forfeit, aka just don't get pinned, yeah, oh, I can do that, like I can do that. So of course I ended up winning my first match. Actually my first day of practice, I knocked a kid's tooth out.
Speaker 2:I'm like I love this that's awesome, that's great, that's great. So, with, with the, with, I guess, the competing starting in middle school, things like that, and obviously now we know the dynamic with mom and dad. What were, what were some of the? Once you started, you liked it were. You kind of getting some friends are like, oh, you should try this tournament, you should do this. How can we're going to this one this weekend and you tell your parents, oh, can I go to that? When did you really start kind of, I guess, spreading your wings a little bit when it came to wrestling?
Speaker 3:yeah, you know I was lucky enough like, uh, my school program, it was just natural to go through that. And then we had a club program attached to it, so everything was kind of calendared out, you know. You could just kind of pick and choose. And then I got to be in high. School is when I started being like, oh I want to go here, and I had my group of friends, so it's like, you know, all the one of the years like we're going to Portage next weekend, so we would do things like that. That was when I kind of got more autonomy from that.
Speaker 3:And I was such a multi-sport athlete all the way through high school, even Like I was not a single sport athlete until my senior year that a lot of times it was like I just had another season, so like wrestling season had an end, actually end actually, and I would go then or track or whatever. So that kind of came from having to pick a lot of things Always. I just it was busy.
Speaker 2:Sure, sure. So with with that, with the middle school, you know, middle school wrestling is is what it is, Right, but Indiana is not a slouch when it comes to wrestling. So it's not to say that every single town is a Perry, right. It's kind of like Wisconsin, where you guys have like maybe three or four schools that are really good. Then we have three or four schools that are really good, but none of us are nationally ranked right. It's one of those things where we still had good competition, it was a good level of wrestling, but then once you went outside and did national stuff, you're like holy crap, there's a whole different level, right?
Speaker 2:yeah, so we we took liam on his first national tournament when he was like nine. When was your first like big tournament?
Speaker 3:oh, I would say, well, I didn't even start wrestling until I was 10 and then maybe 13 or okay. So, um, that was like my first big nationals. Yeah, probably about 13 years old.
Speaker 2:Where was that?
Speaker 3:Banked man. It took me a while to do well at a national tournament.
Speaker 2:That's all right.
Speaker 3:I remember I did Iowa nationals I don't know what they're called now. We just were in Iowa, it was. I think it's called now. We just were in Iowa, it was.
Speaker 2:I think it's Folk Style Nationals or something like that.
Speaker 3:It was rough. Oh my God, that was versus boys. I lost very badly. My first girls national tournament was USGWA. It was actually. Michigan. It was in Michiganigan, you said yeah, okay, livonia, michigan, I believe, and I also lost very badly, yeah it doesn't really matter, because you're holding an olympic gold medal now, so that loss I can't complain right, right, um.
Speaker 2:So when you guys because you mentioned too about you know all boys and you know some people will be harsh, things like that were. Were you ever at tournaments where your parents saw people acting just completely insane towards their boy, having to wrestle a girl, and they're like nope, we're out?
Speaker 3:you know, it was like a lot of like boys would just like forfeit, like refuse to wrestle me, so that would happen.
Speaker 3:A bunch of shit yeah, it's like okay, well, nothing like yeah, it was yeah, so that would happen. I don't think ever anything. I mean that's probably a really great question. I've never asked them that they experienced, maybe in the stands or anything, say things to me, but I think they were far enough away that they didn't see or hear it and I wasn't going to go tell them. You know, maybe guys were mean to me on the mat or a little rougher, you know what I mean Like, but they were never. You know they're like she's were never. You know they're like she's tough. We're good.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we're good, we're good, all right so, uh, it says here, as far as the information that I have, the town you're granger, indiana. But what high school did you go to?
Speaker 3:Penn High School.
Speaker 2:Penn, that's right, penn. Okay. So what was what was that like? What was that like growing up? How was that high school environment for you?
Speaker 3:Oh, it was fantastic. I mean, they're so supportive. You know so many girls and women that I talked to and had their experience in high school was very brutal, like I feel, even silly, even, you know, having something to say in that department, because for the most part, everyone was so supportive and, like those boys on my team that I wrestled with are still, to this day, my best friend. In fact, my drill partner from seventh grade, all the way through high school, came to Paris this last summer to watch and cheer me on, like that's how close we still are so you know, and it was like that really across the board.
Speaker 3:Um, now there were moments there were people who were absolutely jerks to me at that time, for sure, but few and far between, and so that was just super cool and the whole, the whole administration supported it. You know, it wasn't just the wrestling team, it was the school superintendent, like the whole community came behind with a few bad seeds in there that were easy to manage because overwhelmingly supported right that and that's awesome, so that's.
Speaker 2:I guess that's never something we really touched on before. As far as with the, any athlete is just having that. Not only do you have your parents support, but having school support all the way through and coaches and partners and things like that, Because I mean you had you had made a post too, because I know your brother is a Drew.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so he's been. He's been around with you for a little while too as far as practicing, helping, so you had a really good nucleus around you as far as the the you know, parents and and friends and all that. So that's to me that also speaks volumes when it comes to a high level athlete, right, you, you know your ups and downs. Everybody wins, everybody loses, but it's always because I think, we forget about how hard the mental and such as physically, but how hard the mental side of the sport is Right, and especially when you guys are starting to blaze a path, you know, for other girls coming up and doing the things that you guys are doing at the time that you didn't know you were doing. You're just trying to wrestle, right. You're just trying to beat it Right, right, you guys are doing your thing, but your thing was exponentially larger than what it really was.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's so true, knowing that obviously you're coming up and going through high school wrestling and things like that. Did you ever have a moment where you're like I don't know if I want to do this anymore? I'm good on wrestling.
Speaker 3:My whole career every other week was probably like what am I doing? If you're going to bake a cake or something, for sure, I mean, wrestling is so hard, it is so hard and there's so many elements to it and it's. It takes a lot of courage and I never identified as somebody who is courageous. I never identified as somebody who was resilient or tough to this day. Even I'm like I feel very frail. I'm a very emotional. I never identified as somebody who was resilient or tough to this day. Even I'm like I feel very frail. I'm a very emotional.
Speaker 3:I cry very easily and it's always been the case. And so when you put that next to a picture of what you think an Olympic gold medalist is, it's it's not me, like I. I'm afraid of everything and I'm always crying and I'm sleepy a lot. I'm afraid of everything and I'm always crying and I'm sleepy a lot. Don't feel tough ever. And so there's, of course, a lot of moments where you doubt that and so to that point of just like having this group of people around you who support you and hold your hand through that and just kind of just boost you up in a way and remind you like what you're trying to do has nothing to do with winning, it's just growing as a person, um, and I realized that when I was in high school.
Speaker 2:Of course, I didn't have that amount of wisdom yet, but it was still between that, you know, and, and that was helpful yeah, so going through pen, and because this has always been different for every athlete, but it's always especially different for the girls, right? What was you're going through high school wrestling, and obviously there's challenges, but you were doing other. What other sports were? Was it soccer in high school? What else? What other sports were you doing?
Speaker 3:Soccer in high school. Yeah, I think it was just wrestling and soccer by high school. Maybe a little tennis here and there. I was hanging on that.
Speaker 2:You're, yeah you're. You're already one of my favorites for just hanging on to soccer, that's fantastic soccer was.
Speaker 3:I still have dreams about playing soccer man, I tell you what.
Speaker 2:I didn't get to go. My brother was sent over to europe to play soccer for, um, uh, usa soccer, whatever it was at the time. But my parents spent all the money on him, right, like I didn't get to go, because I guarantee you, if I, yeah, if I went over, I wasn't coming back.
Speaker 3:There's no way that's why they didn't have any money. They're like we're not letting him go I would not be coming back.
Speaker 2:So so that process that you wound up going through, then you know wrestling doing and then you said you kind of wound up doing, uh, wrestling only your senior year what was? Were you getting calls from colleges, things like that? I mean what? What was that process like for you?
Speaker 3:yeah, you know, there were so few schools at that time which is just crazy to think how we're at now. But I was getting contacted by um a few coaches. Funnily, the program I wanted to go to wasn't giving me a ton of attention. But I was like hell-bent, I'm like we're going here. But once I got there and I realized they weren't like super interested, I was like okay, maybe it is time to give it, but which?
Speaker 3:you know it all worked out in the end and yeah, it was a lot of that. My parents were very um, you need to take care of this type of deal and it was. I hated it, like even to the point when, like time to tell the schools I wasn't gonna go there. I'm like they just like they'll find out. They're like you will call them and you'll thank them, you'll tell them you're not going. I'm like, oh my God, the confrontation.
Speaker 2:It's difficult, right? I mean, you guys are so young. Yeah, you guys are young. You haven't had to even call a boss and be like I can't make it into work or anything, right?
Speaker 2:No, Papa and mama, He'll be we're like so when you made that, when you made the first. So there are a couple stories that we've heard where guys are like, hey, I'm not going to go here, kind of thing, and coach is like fine, you know. It's why you know, all of a sudden, I think, did you have coaches that were upset with you when you called them to tell them no?
Speaker 3:no, everybody. I mean. You know they give you the hard, like you know, a little bit of a hard time, but nothing, not everyone was always so kind, and even my career, I feel like I just had really great relationships with all the coaches that I had spoken with and it was always good vibes in that. In that regard, nice, nice.
Speaker 2:So you wound up at king. So what? Let's say whoop, whoop. Let's talk about that for a minute. What, what? Obviously they were one of the ones that contacted you, right?
Speaker 3:Yes.
Speaker 2:What was the draw?
Speaker 3:Like why I ended up going there.
Speaker 2:What drew you to them?
Speaker 3:Yeah, it's funny because, well, I didn't want to go there. It was like last. And so once I realized that first program I wanted to go to didn't want me, I went down to oklahoma city, which they were the number one women's wrestling program at the time, and I'm like, all right, boom, this is where I'm going, like I'm going here, they're the best, I'm the best, we're gonna be the best together yay, yeah yeah, close the storybook.
Speaker 3:Um, my parents were like I think you should go on this visit and I was like bro, no, like you know, I'm a senior in high school, I just want to hang out. So we end up going. I think my mom actually, kind of low-key, bribed me by being like, oh, because we drove from Indiana to Tennessee, she's like we'll just stop at all the outlet malls on the way. I'm like I'm in.
Speaker 2:So she's a shopper, everybody she's a shopper.
Speaker 3:So we did a lot of shopping and, you know, did the whole thing.
Speaker 3:And then I went to King for my visit and it wasn't even necessarily the wrestling, although that was great, and Jason Mormon, the coach at the time, he was fantastic as well, really cool, really steady, really. It was the girls and they just took me and we went to like intramurals there was an intramural basketball game or something whatever. They were a part of an intramural team and I just watched and cheered with the girls and like hung out. We went to Sonic afterwards and got food and I was like I could see myself doing, like it was the outside of wrestling life and I was like I could see myself being a person here and like making friends here, whereas like every other program I went to, I was like you're going to wrestle and we have this weight room and we're going to work out all the time and I'm like whoa, I'm more than that yeah, right, well, that was the, that was the big thing that that we looked at too, as far as and just knowing and having the, the people around us that we know.
Speaker 2:There are a lot of things they told us like you know basically exactly what you said. You, you have to be comfortable with your environment. You have to be comfortable when you're not wrestling, when you're not in the wrestling room. You have to like the stuff around you people, environment. So it totally makes sense and it's kind of funny how you probably stumbled upon that yourself, right? I mean, a lot of people don't realize that they're on the track of. You know, like I want to go to Iowa or I'm going to go. I'm going to go to iowa or I'm gonna go, I'm number one, I'm gonna go here. You know that kind of thing. So, and it's all right, there's nothing wrong with that. But in the grand scheme of things, how comfortable are you there, you know, are you only comfortable in the wrestling room? And then when you go to walk down to jimmy john's, you're like I don't want to be here, you know that kind of thing.
Speaker 3:It's funny. I wrote out a spreadsheet of and prioritizing like what was most important to me, but it was all to do with wrestling. So I was like training partners, this, like all of these, and you're right, I wasn't even aware of it until I stepped in and experienced it and I was like, wow, that was so much fun and they also have good training partners and a good coach and we, you know. And then that made other things more doable too, like okay, do we have the best wrestling room? I don't know, but I don't care, because these things are so much better and I realize they're more important to me yep, I think it's.
Speaker 2:It's really big, especially for kids now, that if you're listening to this like it's all encompassing, like you have to, you have to be able to live life. Imagine you got thrown out of school and you can't go home and you're stuck in that town. Would you stay there?
Speaker 2:exactly you know, and that's kind of the way we painted it out to Liam and you know, the the same thing with him, like he loved. Every visit, you know, I was like, oh, this is so cool, it's so cool. But it was the one that was like this feels different, this feels better. You know, like you're there it's totally Correct.
Speaker 3:So what year did you graduate in high school? 2011.
Speaker 2:Yes, 11. So let's jump to 2013. You were you. You represented the United States. You were in Kazan, Russia.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and, yeah, you wound up winning a medal, right? No, so yeah, what's that? I did not win a medal at that.
Speaker 2:That was a university worlds game yes summer universe, iod or something.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yes, basically what you 23s are today, but I am a nice seasoned wrestler. So back in the day, way back in my time, they did not have U23 worlds, they had university worlds.
Speaker 2:So that's what it was called. Okay, so, with that being said, when was your first overseas experience?
Speaker 3:Was that it no, oh my gosh, I was fooled. I I actually my first overseas trip. So I actually had gone to a Pan Am a junior Pan Ams, which was in Nicaragua, but obviously not overseas. And then my first overseas trip was to Pattaya, Thailand, for junior worlds in 2011. So this stage for my international trips. I'm like Thailand. What an experience. We're on the beach, we're riding elephants, we're like eating the best fruit known to man. It was great. Color me surprised when my butt ends up in Krasnoyarsk, russia, three years later negative 40 degrees. I'm like like wait, these are trips.
Speaker 2:I thought we were going to thailand yeah, right, so that must have been the uregan you went to then, huh yeah, yeah, which is amazing.
Speaker 3:Oh no, I actually on that.
Speaker 2:I love that tournament, love that yeah, well, you've killed it every time you've been there, I'm pretty sure. So, yeah, gold and silver.
Speaker 3:Gold and silver.
Speaker 2:So that's the other thing. So a lot of I mean we can talk about college and things like that and things are just so weird. I think in your guys's time in college right, it wasn't, it was emerging Things are coming up but you guys didn't have the exposure Right. So that's where. So that's where that's where a lot. And obviously you guys still wrestle freestyle in college and you know most high schools do. We don't hear wia doesn't have freestyle because wouldn't have the referees to do it, things like that. I still feel like it's a bummer for the girls.
Speaker 2:But either way it's a step up, we'll take it we'll take it and yeah, right, exactly. So your meteoric rise essentially comes after college here. So are you yourself putting yourself into different training uh schedules and things like that? Once you got through college, you kind of experienced that I guess, higher level type thing where you now understanding that there is a, a training regimen that needs to go on cycles. You know they call it um. Were you, if were you, figuring that out once you got overseas, or were you figuring that out in college already?
Speaker 3:no, college was a mess. Uh, I uh honestly even like, so I was done with school in 2015. I went home, thought I could train at home in indiana. That wasn't gonna work, um, so that's when I moved out to the olympic training center summer of 2015. Wow, uh, you know, it's still just kind of a lost puppy. Like wrestling wasn't like mine, yet like I was doing it because I was decent at it and you know, I was traveling the world and that was it. Like it was fun, but there was nothing but like like my drive of like I want to win an olympic gold medal. It was just I was kind of there like sure, uh, it happened until 2017, when I had dislocated my and so I had already made by this.
Speaker 3:Yes, yes so it just really after I dislocated my elbow. That was when I kind of really started understanding and buying into all of this and just focusing on that well, yeah, because you can tell, because 2017 was a silver.
Speaker 2:Then after that, it's gold, gold, gold, gold, gold, gold, gold. And then there's the. You got 20, was that Pan Am Games 2019? Gold. You had a couple of bronze in Belgrade, but it just seemed like you were just like. You just said you were starting to put things together right. Were you already being coached by terry? Was he in the program by then?
Speaker 3:yeah, yeah, terry was my coach. Yeah, starting in 2015 terry steiner.
Speaker 2:for the people that are new to this, um, I had his brother on a couple times. Yeah, I know, I know they're. They're both awesome, don't you know? Those are those guys I idolized when watching them in college. That was my era. So, knowing that he was in charge of the girls program, I was like this is going to get good and it's only gotten better. Right, it's only gotten better. So, with your A big thing that we talk about here, because we've had a shoot from Vision Quest, frank Jasper yeah, we've had him on a couple of times. He's got a master's in Chinese nutrition, right. So we really started to dial Liam in a little bit more at nutrition. Man, did I notice a difference in him? Right? Were there little things like that that you're starting to put together that you really I mean, obviously you didn't really pay attention to much, but you kind of knew it was there Were those the little things you were starting to kind of change and you noticed a?
Speaker 3:progression. You're good, you're good. I got 50%. We're good, you're good. Thanks, brandon. I'm sharing a chart Sorry, everyone watching. I'm sharing a charger with my strength and conditioning coach who is doing a remote strength and conditioning program. He's at two percent, so we're good. I have one percent, so now we're rocking and rolling we're good.
Speaker 2:We're good. So was that? Were you starting to find little pieces that you weren't able to, you didn't really pay attention to before, that you noticed were starting to give you a little more success or feeling a little bit better about yourself as far as competition and and training? Where did you notice those changes starting to come in? Was that once you got out the Olympic Training Center, or was that you went somewhere else?
Speaker 3:Nope, I moved to the training center in 2015. I've been here ever since.
Speaker 2:Man, you are a resident.
Speaker 3:I was a resident, lived here on complex for four years in the dorms and, in 2018, house just three miles away. So this is home, yeah. But even when I first moved out here, it took some time, like I said, so probably around 2017, I had made the decision. You know, nutrition was a big thing for me, so I used to wrestle 55 kilos and then I just kept coming down so 55, 53 and then 50 eventually, and so, yeah, I had to buy into nutrition a lot.
Speaker 3:I had to study that and I, you know, I remember having this thought of like okay, I see the people around me, I see my own experience. Nobody is cutting weight really that well. Like this is so dumb. Like I learned from them, I'm doing this. We. Nobody is cutting weight really that well Like we're. This is so dumb. Like I learned from them, I'm doing this. We're all cutting weight dumb. When I had enough like awareness to like realize that I was like whoa, that's something I can exploit. Like, if I get good at this, 90% of my opponents are not good at this Like that's an advantage and it's a big one because it kind of is this uh, foundation for the rest of those things you know my technique, my strength, all of that so recovery?
Speaker 3:Yep, totally. So I'm like, wow, what a big hole, what a big blind spot and really wrestling that really, really take advantage of. Um, and that was kind of what initiated that, and, again, great people around me and I just started learning, studying, relying on and getting help by people and slowly taking the time to understand nutrition and bringing my weight down, and that's what I did.
Speaker 2:So that's a big spot for me Before you got, because we obviously we all know that's a big spot for me. Before you got, because we obviously we all know that the olympics is is huge. But before you got to the olympics, right, what was to to that? Between 2017, 2024, before the olympics, what was your most um, I would say memorable and meant the most to you up until the olympics? What win and what? What I guess tournament meant the most to you that you want to walk away with? I don't care if it's a bronze medal, because I mean, third, you still gotta come back right.
Speaker 3:So that's, that's a big deal still yes, I would say like the 2021 olympics bronze medal would be probably the most like ridiculous win because I had lost so heartbreakingly in the Olympic semifinals. Coming back for that one but there's so many in that period. You know, 2018, making that world team was really big for me. I had made a world team in 2016, but I don't know why it just felt like I still not bought into wrestling in the way that I started to buy in in 2018.
Speaker 3:So 2018 felt like that start, Like I had injured my elbow in 2017 and I was kind of just like second on the ladder, you know good, but nobody was really like expecting anything from me. And by the middle of 2018, I was ranked number one in the world, so there was like such that seven month span Like it was so insane, it was meteoric.
Speaker 3:It felt like in my, my mind and brain and somewhere I never thought I was ever gonna be, and so I think that 2018 world team win was like oh my god, we're doing it, like this is actually I want this and I'm actually doing it in a way that I'm proud of, and it kind of really just set the stage for you know all the way through 24.
Speaker 2:Well, that's, that's. The thing is like I mean, even even when you're talking about injury and, like you said, you weren't, you didn't, the sport wasn't yours, it wasn't your thing quite yet, but even at that statement, like looking at what you did and and just so, the mind boggles when you hear someone number one who wins the olympics, right, and then they tell you that you just still hadn't bought in yet to to what that, this, what the sport meant to you, and you're just got done saying you're number one in the world. So it's kind of crazy, it's a level, there's levels to this stuff. And that's the other thing that people don't kind of you know, they don't understand, right like you guys. You guys put it in the parents of kids that are like 10, 12 years old. You don't even know what the half yet. And you don't wanna, right, you don't need to. You let them have fun, exactly.
Speaker 2:But just, but just, knowing that you came from, I'm just gonna try this out and this, you know that and the other thing. And I'm just, I really like this college, I'm gonna try this out and see what happens. You still haven't bought into it. Then you sit there, like I said, I'm sitting here looking at your metal count and it's like holy shit, like you hadn't bought in yet and this is what you were still doing. Like that's crazy. So how, how is it like for? Like you get nervous before all matches, is it? Is it something like that for you, or is it? You had this kind of thing now where you it's all kind of, I guess, part of it, right, you don't feel like it's nervousness, it's just part of it.
Speaker 3:Um, kind of in a way, but I, yeah, like I said, I'm a really fragile person, so I'm, uh, absolutely nervous. It was more about not judging myself for being nervous and like allowing those uncomfortable emotions to be present because you're doing something that's nerve-wracking, it is stressful, you know, and, instead of spending so much energy pretending it doesn't exist or trying not to feel them, being open to feeling whatever the heck decides to come up and still being able to take effective actions in the presence of those emotions and that was what 2018 through 2024 was a lesson of and I failed, you know, so many times. Um so, but yes, I am before every single one of my matches before 2024 olympics. The day before, I sat on the floor of my hotel room and wept, I mean cried like one of those, like, like one of those guys. Oh man, turned to my boyfriend and I'm like, I'm scared. I'm so scared. Sure.
Speaker 3:Sure, and he was just there. You know there's nothing to say, but I just say the picture of like I again, I think people think of elite athletes, Olympic athletes, as these confident, I feel no bad emotion kind of person and not true. Like everyone is so nervous, Like you can't even move Sometimes you're so nervous and it's really about dealing in being with those emotions versus like pushing them away.
Speaker 2:Did you have to go and talk Like do you ever sports psychologist? Have you ever had to use that dive into that world?
Speaker 3:Yeah, three sports psychologists. Like I said, very fragile.
Speaker 2:But that's and that's fine, though, because I think recognizing that there's a barrier and then knocking the barrier down is part of the process, right? I mean that's especially when it comes to a confidence level, because, again, this game is very mental, not just physical. It's very mental, like you said, every and because everybody's made differently up here exactly, and everybody can handle pressure the same. So, with that being said, the the psychology side of it, where what was that? Was there ever a point because I asked you this when you're younger, even in this, right now, when you got 2017, 2018 through 2024 was there a point where you're like I'm, I gotta stop, I'm done, this is too much yes, oh my gosh, I uh.
Speaker 3:So actually, 2022 was a really horrible year for me and I was after 2022. Um then, I had walked away with a bronze medal, I uh at worlds, but yes, yes, I mean, there are moments. Seriously, I had already made the Olympic team in 2024. I'm a big writer. I journal every single day of my life.
Speaker 2:And oh, nice Okay.
Speaker 3:Of writing. So you know, it's fun to look back on my experience leading in, but I had already made the Olympic team and I was writing about like Sarah, you don't even have to go to the Olympics if you don't want to Like. There's still those thoughts of like if you don't want to do this, if you really don't want to do this, you don't have to. Because I was writing that because there was thoughts in my head being like don't do it, don't go, it's too scary, it's too much or it's. You know, I don't want to go through this.
Speaker 3:I don't want to wake up, I don't want to bear my heart and soul on that mat one more time and get my heart broken again, like they're all the way. You know we're talking two months out from the Olympics, so that's a constant thing, um, and you know, again relying on people close to me and also just realizing that your mind offers up a ton of crazy emotions and thoughts. It's seeking for certainty. I wasn't going to have certainty until the Olympics, so you know who knew what my brain was going to throw at me in those months leading up, years leading up? Um, you know, thoughts are just thoughts. They're not. It doesn't mean anything, it's not concrete, it's not prophecy fulfilling, it's just a thought. And if I could let it pass on by and still do what I knew was important to me, yeah, okay.
Speaker 2:I think athletes get the it's the, the phrase you just brought up the prophecy fulfilling. I think athletes live that a little too much, right. Like I think I thought, and it's fine if it works. But I think we live it a little too much. When it comes down to the point of, like, where am I supposed to go with this? Like there's when you ask yourself a question of how much longer can I do it. It's not even so much a prophecy thing, it's just it's almost like a self-reliance, Like I'm relying on myself to be able to get myself through this with myself, right. Like it's just kind of a crazy circle And're going to jump on the 2024 Olympics here quick. When you're training again, you had good coaches, good support system, things like that. When you got down to brass tacks and you get into the gym, wherever you're competing at at the competition, is there a switch for you? Is there a switch that does turn off at some point, where it's like the, the sound is not there.
Speaker 3:All you see is the person in front of you and it's like kind of goes by, because liam just told me the other day like he doesn't remember most of his matches when he wrestles I remember my matches, but there's definitely I'm a much better uh competitor than I like I compete better than I train, in my opinion, and so really for me and my support staff, coaching staff everyone knew this about me Like we just got to get her to the competition and we'll be okay, and so a lot of it. As soon as I got on that plane to leave for a competition, it was like like a weight had fallen off me. I was light, I was happy, I was excited. Everyone was like Whoa, this girl is weeping on the floor Now with that said. Like I said, I cried the day before the Olympics those waves, but for the most part I feel exponentially better Like the week of a competition versus like a month out from a competition. I am miserable and sufferable. I I want to quit.
Speaker 2:I want to. I want to reach out to you a month before you compete again. I won't respond. Let's see where you're at and be like hey, just checking in, we want to go through this with don't you don't want to talk to me?
Speaker 2:we got, um, we get to a point now where we're at the olympics, the 2024 olympics what just getting there right, right, that that's a big deal, you know. But you've been in, you made an olympic team before. All things like that with the olympics and and the weight and just the dreams that a kid has, right, just to just thinking of it as a kid, like I'm gonna go to the olympics one day and I'm gonna you see all the podium pictures and things like that. But you wind up there, right, and you, like you said, you're, you're losing your mind, kind of thing it. But once, once you're there and you're inside and you're smelling the whatever it is that they had over there in Paris. I don't know, who knows what they're cooking. What was that life like, living in that? Because you're already nervous right Now. You're kind of. You still have competitors that are USA competitors. It's not like you're alone or anything like that, but you're kind of alone, right. I mean, you're sitting there in bed on those cardboard ass beds that they had for you guys.
Speaker 3:No, so exactly they were cardboard beds, which they were hard. You know it was a crazy, so we're lucky. So we were actually in the village for about maybe like four days when we first got there and that's with everybody, all the sports, all the teams.
Speaker 3:It's very chaotic, but I was really kind of letting myself experience it. I didn't get to experience it at Tokyo because of COVID. We were at the end of the Olympics, so we still had a lot of time. So I was just like, can you be present with this day and just enjoy it? And you know it was hard. I remember we were all at practice. It was us and men's freestyle team and everyone's just messing around like having a good time, and I was not having it. Like I just start crying, I'm like we need to train.
Speaker 3:And actually Kyle Dake, I like crying to him. He's like a good friend of mine and he's like we need to train. And actually Kyle Dake, I like crying to him. He's like a good friend of mine and he's like okay, fine, We'll put you through this like stance and motion workout. This poor man is like trying to put me through something serious. He's, of course, cool as a cucumber, Everyone's cool as a cucumber. I'm crying, so I will not forget that moment of just like talk about good team, Like people around me.
Speaker 3:They're like okay, well, you know he helps me those stuff like that, leaning on people like that, and then, um, we left for normandy after the first four days. So, oh, that's right, and that was amazing, it was so great right off the beach, it was absolutely, and that's where we were training, where it was just the wrestling usa wrestling team and so, and then we came back and I competed about three days after we got back to paris and at that point we did not stay at the village, we stayed in a hotel, um, so again, I was not around my competitor much, but yeah.
Speaker 2:So when you, when you talk about like the, the living because again, I'm just thinking about you right as the, as the mental side of it, and you're already kind of, you're breaking down a little bit, and things like that I'd be nervous too, like I was. I was nervous when I made my first olympic development team at like 13. I thought I was gonna crap my pants like because I don't, I'm not that good guys like I. I don't understand why I'm here, you know. So, yeah, I know, right, they're going to see me for who I am. This is terrible People are going to laugh at me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I thought I was going to fail. But you're in this foreign land, right You're? You're surrounded by probably the best thing, that areas probably mcdonald's, because god knows what they bring in that that olympic, uh, that olympic center. But with the, you know, you got the guys that were kind of helping you out, you got a little bit of a workout. You go into the first match. How did you feel after the first match? Did you feel after the first match like the weight was gone, kind of lifted from you a little bit?
Speaker 3:I was free as a bird it was really it was amazing feeling. I was it. I you know, especially because the first match, the first round of my weight class was huge. So, like the Japanese woman, yui Sasaki goes down in the first round, she's never lost an international match ever.
Speaker 3:And you know, won the Olympics, won all the world championships in between, um the heavy favorite, and so that happened in the first round, yep. So I had to maintain a sense of composure while everything around me was kind of like it turned up the intensity in the tournament. Some it was like, oh my god, now you really can't mess up. You really can't mess up because now there's, you know, look, this field has opened up in a way. No one in your way, yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3:And so there was a quote now, but I was in such a it's almost dreamlike looking back. I I was very present, I was very open to just enjoying the experience. I I remember not being able to feel like sometimes you go into a competition you're like, oh, I feel like I'm gonna win. Or sometimes you're like I'm nervous I might lose, or it doesn't dictate the outcome usually, but like you have an inkling of what you feel. Like I could not see the end of any of my wrestling matches like I could just see myself wrestling and that. And it was like I had no feeling, I had no desire of winning, I had no scared like afraidness of losing. Like it was so much just present moment wrestling, that like winning and losing felt like such a faraway concept even in the midst of all of that which, looking back on it even now, I'm like, how yeah.
Speaker 2:So it's funny that you mentioned that, because I was actually just going to ask you like, when you're middle of these matches, are you? Do you freak out in the middle of the match, like in your head? Obviously you're not looking over your coach like what are we gonna do, but like in your head, where I do, did you have moments? But it sounds like you didn't. It sounds like after that first match things kind of went away a little bit and you're a little more comfortable in your skin. I mean, you'd already done so much, right, like, but it was the pinnacle. It's the pinnacle. It's this is what you guys have been striving to do forever, since tiny kids, since whatever you know. So just kind of knowing and hearing you say that you know I, after I got it, you know, into that match, knew that after the, the outcome, I just had to compose myself and you seem like you held together.
Speaker 2:Now, when you won dude the, the expressions on your face, like watching you celebrate at the end, was classic. It was awesome. You're living in, like you just said, you're living in the moment, right, you're doing what you wanted to do and you're doing and you're happy doing it. So when you got. Tell me about the last, I don't know last few seconds or last like 10 seconds of a match. What were you starting to think already? Once you're looking at the clock, you're like I got this. Like this is mine, like I got this you can't even touch me now, right, like how, how did you, how did that roll out for you in that last match?
Speaker 3:you know, it's really, it was really strange. It was, uh, I could have sat in that five set. I remember I looked at the clock. There was six seconds left and I was like, oh my god, I won, like I just won the Olympics, and there was so much elation and joy. But there was like a weird melancholy to it that it was like done and I was like no, no, don't be over. Like this is so fun. This is such an amazing adventure, this is such a just insane experience in its ticking down like six, I'm like stop, stop. Like, and I, I couldn't get out there and that's seconds forever and like you know, you know, thankfully it actually did feel like it kicked very slowly by, but I it was such a strange mixture of emotion because it was pure I've reached this goal that I've had most of my life and then there was also this well, that means it's it's done and like it's such a weird thing about that other side.
Speaker 3:So you know, of course, the buzzer sounds, the sadness is gone, you're like, yeah, but I remember feeling that like weird melancholy with it of like, oh, my god, I just don't anticipate feeling any negative emotions, right, something like that. But sure enough, of course, emotions will emotion.
Speaker 2:Yeah yeah, right, exactly, start running around looking for like an exhibition match. Hey, anybody else want to wrestle quick? Yeah, I don't want this to be done yet the hour-long match, please.
Speaker 3:I'll live here forever that's so cool.
Speaker 2:So and like I said, it was really fun being able to watch you at that. And don't get me wrong, like everybody has, you know everybody's excited at the end, but like watching you, it just felt like it was like I fucking finally did it. This is it.
Speaker 2:I love it you know, like just the look on your face. You're even the picture that you sent me. I mean, everybody behind you is just excited. They're as excited as you were and that all those feelings came out and you get you. You get, like, certain guys that get interviews. They get a little. Maybe they get a little sappy at the end when they're interviewed, kind of thing. But like it was just kind of fun being able to watch you celebrate, because it felt like we could feel that celebration as well. So that was awesome thanks, yeah, that no.
Speaker 3:It was truly one of the moments. You're just like I. I don't know how anybody composes themselves up there I I've had so many people tell me they're like oh, it's so nice to see you, like just completely expressing yourself.
Speaker 2:I'm like how someone composes themselves I have a picture of me because I tried wrestling when I was like 32, again 33, in an outside tournament, and I think I still got a medal, even though I shouldn't have, because it was a it was like a local, like youth kind of tournament thing and they just let old guys sign up for it, and I remember, sitting on the I don't think I'd ever gotten a medal as a youth right, I sucked, I was terrible. And then, yeah, right, right, I got up on the podium for for this old guys tournament kind of thing. I'm like I think I was excited about that. I was like I got a fucking medal. This is so cool.
Speaker 3:I love that. You should be excited about that. Like just those things man like celebrate, whatever it is. Oh gosh, I'm such a fan of over-celebrating.
Speaker 2:Right, right, right, exactly. So I mean that was the best thing, like I said, of watching everything about. I mean, obviously it was fun watching you win, but, like, at the end it was just like she is living in the moment, entirely right there. So cool, so cool. So we've been going for about an hour. A lot of times we go for all kinds of crazy amounts of times we we rattled through, but we also know that you're dealing with a charger issue.
Speaker 2:That's true so so we don't want to. We don't want anything dying Cause I tell you this much, I had Sri on on a couple of times. I actually had my computer unplugged for one of them and just lost the whole episode and start over, yeah, and had to start over, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it was crazy, but he understood, he was fine. He's going to come back, but it was a little different. We don't want to have any dying, but I appreciate you taking the time out and sitting and talking with us, sarah, it's been awesome. Yeah, any time, actually, before we even leave. Do you have any shout outs?
Speaker 3:Oh my God. Well then we'll be on for an hour, but oh my gosh, shout out Seriously, just to anybody who's supported and just cheered me on along the way. Seriously, I am so grateful for just all the relationships I've built in this sport, and that includes people that I haven't even met, who have just like I just feel the love and it's a cool thing and I'm just grateful for it all and it's a cool thing and I'm just grateful for it all, so thanks for listening to me Blab.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and you gained my wife. She said I think she's my favorite guest. Oh, yay, thank you, my wife has chimed in and giving you the approval. So that's even better. Yeah, so what do you have coming up next? Anything coming up. Are you training for anything? What are you doing?
Speaker 3:I'm not training right now, really, I mean you know I said that as I also just came to this interview after practice, but uh, it doesn't feel like training yeah, it's fine I'm lying, it's fun yeah I have to convince myself.
Speaker 2:No yeah, because you didn't leave your shoes in the middle, or nothing. So what do you? Do you have plans of competing?
Speaker 3:next, I don't know. I'm going to just kind of keep I am hungry, for I can't make the decision to retire without having had some other perspective. So I want to kind of I'm hungry for some perspective here, and I don't know if I'm going to get that by continuously competing. With that said, I don't, I might come back to being I don't know, but I do know I need some perspective and I need some life lessons in a different Avenue, and so I'm going to pump the brakes on competing just for a little bit, get some clarity and go from there.
Speaker 2:A little clarity, okay. Well, I'm going to talk to you for just a second once we're done here, but we're going to let the folks go. I appreciate everybody tuning in. It's been Sarah Hildebrandt, man, olympic gold medalist. This has been a great conversation. Thank you very much. So anybody, if you haven't, go check her out on Instagram. I believe you're on some other socials too, but go check her out, man. I mean, she's got some pretty decent perspective when it comes to just girls wrestling and athletics in general. So check her out, sarah. It's been awesome. We are going to tell the folks that. We're going to tell the folks goodbye, so peace.
Speaker 3:Bye, thank you everyone.
Speaker 2:And it.
