Beyond Religion: Finding Freedom in Faith with Desiree Taylor

Desiree Taylor shares her powerful journey from progressive hearing loss to ministry leader, demonstrating how our perceived limitations can become our greatest strengths when we move beyond religion to relationship with God.

• Desiree experienced progressive hearing loss starting around age 3-4, receiving her first hearing aid at age 9
• Growing up with hearing loss led to feelings of isolation, insecurity, depression and anger
• After walking away from faith as a teenager, Desiree had a transformative personal encounter with God during her pregnancy
• When digital hearing aids stopped working in her late 20s, Desiree made the decision to receive bilateral cochlear implants
• Religion focuses on behavior and perfectionism, while relationship with God offers freedom and embracing our weaknesses
• Having consistent mentors and community is crucial for spiritual growth
• Desiree now serves as a writer, speaker, and mentor to women, particularly young adults
• Her book "Created to Relate: Living Beyond Religion" explores moving from religious obligation to authentic relationship
• Sometimes our greatest challenges become our unique strengths—"Sometimes my best writing is when my ears are off"

Visit Desiree's website at www.arenewedcreation.com to connect, read her blog, and learn more about her ministry.

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Chapters

• 0:50 Welcome to Is Your Way In Your Way
• 3:18 Introducing Desiree Taylor's Story
• 5:30 Desiree's Backstory and Hearing Loss
• 10:01 From Hearing Aids to Cochlear Implants
• 14:59 Living Beyond Religion
• 18:37 The Importance of Mentorship
• 25:26 Finding Your Calling and Next Steps
• 32:00 Closing Prayer and Final Thoughts

Transcript

Cassandra: 0:25

Good day out there to all of my listeners and I'd like to welcome you to Is your Way In your Way podcast, and my name is Cassandra. I'm your host, cassandra Crawley-Mayo, and those are for those new listeners out there that, where this is the first time you're hearing this podcast, I actually want to share with you what this podcast is all about and also the name of my book is titled Is your Way In your Way. And for many of us I think, maybe all of us we are the biggest barrier to our own breakthrough, and that's what Is your Way In your Way has come about. So what I'm requesting to my listeners it's time for us to stop playing small. Let's get clear. Let's rise boldly into your calling, both personally and professionally. That, to me, is very important because there's so many things that we are to do, must do not doing frustrated because we figure that you know I'm stuck and I want to do this and I want to do that, but yet you just can't seem to get through there, and that's why I said we are the biggest barriers to our own breakthroughs.

Cassandra: 1:44

So think about this have you ever thought that the thing that was supposed to hold you back was actually, what catapulted you forward? What if losing something like your hearing or your sight, or your leg or a loved one led you to gain more clarity, strength and an unshakable faith? So today's guest, desiree Taylor. She is a walking example of what happens when you stop trying to control everything and start trusting God with everything. That sounds like me. From her journey as a bilateral cochlear implant recipient to her passion for mentorship, ministry and walking with women through every season, desiree's story will move you. It's going to inspire you and challenge you to ask is your way in your way? So stay with us, because this conversation is something you will not want to miss, and let me introduce you to Desiree Taylor. Hi, desiree, how are you?

Desiree: 3:01

Hi, good morning. Thank you for having me. I'm so good this morning. I'm excited to be here.

Cassandra: 3:07

Oh, my goodness, I'm so excited for you to be here because I can't wait to my listeners hear your story, because I know it's going to be so inspiring. But before we get started, let me read your bio so they will all have a point of reference of why you do what you do, why you have just stepped boldly into your calling. Now Desiree Taylor. She's a writer, a speaker and mentor whose life is a powerful testament to grace, resilience and unwavering faith. 27 years mother and bilateral cochlear implant recipient, desiree shares her personal journey of navigating life's challenges, from a hearing loss to ministry leadership.

Cassandra: 3:58

With a deep love for connecting women to Jesus, she's passionate about mentorship, discipleship and lifting up those, and leadership and transition discipleship and lifting up those in leadership and transition. She offers heartfelt encouragement for women in every season to walk confidently in God's plan for their lives. She even wrote a book created to relate living beyond religion. Now, the type of the title for this particular podcast is learning to live beyond religion. So there's a ray I'd like for you to share with our listeners about your backstory. Um, and and as you were growing, you dealt with a lot of insecurity, severe low self-esteem, depression, anxiety and anger, until you hit rock bottom, so share with them what was going on in your backstory, what happened.

Desiree: 5:05

Well, I grew up in a home. My mom stayed home with us and I had my sister and I had a stepsister too, and so we were a blended family, so to speak. My mom had brought my older sister into the marriage when she married my dad, so there was 13 years difference between her and her, and so my mom was also deaf, so she had the same hearing loss and deafness that I do. So there was a lot of different things going on there. Communication wasn't always great, lots of misunderstandings, you know, and I got my first hearing aid when I was nine years old. So I was very young and having a hearing loss like that, and especially at that young age, kids are already like not nice in some ways. You know so many things that set you apart as it is, and that was just something else that made me different and I was made fun of a lot and I was very much.

Desiree: 6:17

I had a lot of voices telling me who I was and at the same time, my mom had brought us to church and I was learning about Jesus and we went to a Baptist church and I had a lot of friends at school that went to the Catholic church and I was hearing different things about who God was and I was really wanting to understand who God was. Nothing seemed to line up and I was like asking God, who are you to line up? And I was like asking God, who are you? So I'm? There was a lot of things going on in my little brain, in my little world, um, at a very young age, and I had these voices telling me one thing. And then I'm hearing about this Jesus who says something else. So, um, it was good and bad, you know, and I did accept Christ at nine or 10. I was baptized at 10. And but I don't think I ever really understood that God really wanted a relationship with me.

Desiree: 7:24

And if I understood it, I didn't know how that happened you know yes yes, so I had some foundation there, but I felt kind of like the black sheep in my family to a degree, you know. And then I was different at school and and church was the same thing. You know, people don't really know how to deal with you when you have a hearing loss, you know. I think that people have a hard time in general if they don't understand what the disability is and what people need, that they tend to stay away from them. So you feel very isolated.

Desiree: 8:02

And I came to a place where I was. I was just so lonely and so depressed and I just really wasn't believing that God was with me. I wasn't seeing things line up because I didn't feel like he was there. I didn't feel like he was. Anything was better. You know you can hear these calls to the altar. You know you receive Jesus and life is just grand and I wasn't seeing a whole lot of yes, I understand, yes, yeah so I saw a lot of it just looked like it was greener.

Desiree: 8:39

On the other side, I saw other people flourishing house and they weren't Christians, you know. So I'm like I'm done with this for now. And yeah, that's when I was around 17 when I walked away from the Lord for a time. It didn't last very long. I fell very hard very quickly and ended up pregnant with my older son, and it was in that time that God really brought me back to him in a real and a personal way to him in a real and a personal way.

Cassandra: 9:10

Now, desiree, let me, and I want to. This is just so fascinating. Technology is something. So my listeners, just so you'll know.

Desiree: 9:33

Desiree was born deaf. Okay, is that correct? No, I was around three or four when they found my hearing starting to drop a little bit. It was a progressive deafness, okay, but I was very young when it started and I don't really remember my hearing ever being completely normal.

Cassandra: 9:45

Okay, okay.

Desiree: 9:56

So tell the listeners if you were progressively going deaf, how in the world are you hearing now? Well, I had hearing aids all the way through my since nine, and in my 20s they came out with digital hearing aids for the first time, yes, and so I got my first set of digital hearing aids in my late 20s, but they only lasted six months, and then I was told that I had a decision to make, that the hearing aids weren't working for me any longer, and then I could either just decide not to wear anything or I could choose to go down the path of getting cochlear implants. And after much prayer and sweat and decision, I decided to go with the cochlear implants, but it's been the best decision for me.

Cassandra: 10:47

And that's why, in the beginning of our podcast, we talked about how we would think that what's supposed to hold you back was actually catapulted you to move forward. And by doing that, you know and, like I said, a lot of my listeners there's certain things they want to do, but they just can't seem to get there. They are stuck, they, you know, and I was like you in many instances in regards to God. You can't possibly love me, you can't be the God that everybody's talking about. Because I'm sad, I don't understand why all these things are happening to me, and I had an opportunity to be what I would call bitter or better, and that's kind of when I decided and it was through trials and tribulations where I became better I stopped being bitter and so and for you, you were like, okay, you walked away from God, but God didn't walk away from you, but then you came back, and then you came back. Then is it the relationship that you had with God that supported you and help you get that surgery?

Desiree: 12:08

get that surgery. You think, yeah, I mean, and I came back probably 12 years before I got the surgery, even, okay, it was his personal, it was his personal reason out to me. Okay, one night, while I was pregnant, while I was pregnant, I had been praying and I was just crying and I was just sitting before him. I was just, I didn't know what to do. I was desperate, I was, I was rock bottom, like you said. Okay, I heard him speak to me for the first time. Just, I think that he did it that way in that moment, because that's what I needed. He doesn't speak that way, but in this moment he did. And he told me that he would be my husband and he would be my child's father and that he would be with me.

Desiree: 13:08

And that was the one thing I had the hardest time believing was that he was with me. It was fascinating. But he met me so personally that I couldn't even deny that he was there and that he was with me and where I needed to go, and I was stuck in a lot of ways and I've been stuck along the way in a lot of ways um, he's always been there to pull me out. And as I heard him, I saw this vision of him reaching his hand down to me and he told me to take it and if I would, if I willingly took his hand, that he would walk with me and we would get through this. And I think that really showed me how much he wanted a relationship with me, how personal he really is, and and I never looked back. I mean, I've had trouble along the way but I've never looked back because I remember those moments. Yeah, looking at me personally, you know.

Cassandra: 14:13

Uh-huh, uh-huh. Well, tell us what is the difference between? Well, no, I'm not going to say what's the difference. What is the advantage of learning to live beyond a religion?

Desiree: 14:34

Well, religion keeps us stuck. I think it goes along with what you're saying. Religion is so based on behavior, it's based on what we do, and it just keeps us stuck. There's the reality is we. Perfection is a a farce, I know. As women, we want to be perfect and we want to live up to this perfection.

Desiree: 15:04

But that's why we need Jesus because we can't be perfect. And learning to live in a relationship with Jesus and coming out of living in that legalistic place, in that religious place, it's just, it's freedom, because I don't have to rely on myself, I don't rely on my own strength, I rely on him and his. It's not. I don't have to worry about how to do the things he's calling me to, because he's doing it. And when I know that I'm loved, when I live out of a place of confidence in who God is and his love for me, confidence in who God is and his love for me.

Desiree: 15:55

You know I had been going through that scripture about how perfect love cast out all fear and his perfect love. When I live in that love, that place of knowing how much he loves me, it takes away the fear, it takes away the places that I get stuck so easy, because I don't have to worry and have that anxiety anymore, because he takes it from me and it's just I. I go back to that scripture too about how he's my strength, my weakness, like he's really taught me that I don't have to be ashamed of my weaknesses, I don't have to be ashamed of my limitations, because he's my strength and that's what shows people that he is who he is and he uses it for such good and that really helps me to just to live in freedom.

Cassandra: 16:46

Yeah, yeah. So how can, how can you get a relationship? How does, how do you do that?

Desiree: 16:54

Well, I mean we and I know it sounds so simple. I mean, the beginning is, you know, the beginning is really to acknowledge that we are sinners and that we need a savior and that there is one savior and his name is jesus christ. And and it was just, you know, it was a simple it's a simplistic action of just asking the questions, when I asked him to show me who he is, he shows me like when I am in his word and, um, I ask him to help me understand what he's saying to me. You know, having a good church community, I feel like it's very important to have the right people in your life.

Desiree: 17:42

When I was younger, a lot of the voices and the people around me weren't necessarily the best voices for me when I was pregnant. Everyone left, no one stayed around. You want friends who are walking with the Lord, who love like him, because Jesus stays and your sisters in Christ stay through the good, through the bad. And I think having mentors is important. I always have someone who's older than me in my life. Somehow. I have my peers that I'm walking with and I have my young girls that I can pour into. I think those things are important to keep that relationship with the Lord growing and thriving, and so I think those are simple ways, you know, just when we don't know what to do, we just ask him he's so faithful to meet us, you know.

Cassandra: 18:43

Right, so let's talk about what you were called to do. What are you? What's your calling?

Desiree: 18:54

well, I feel like it's multi-purposed right now, um, you know, and I find myself questioning it in some moments, like if I'm really doing what I should be doing. But, um, but, in my church community I'm very involved. My husband's an elder there and I lead women's small groups, so I'm always connected with women in the body and I do a lot of mentoring with the young adults and and I am a writer, I love writing. Writing has been such a beautiful gift from the Lord because it's a place where, even if I'm having a hard hearing day, I can write. And sometimes my best writing is when my ears are off. That's what I tell people.

Cassandra: 19:43

Your ears are off. Yeah, I love that. I love that. I think I'm going to start using that. I love that. I think I'm going to start using that.

Cassandra: 19:51

I'm writing more. Oh, you are Okay, All right, Because you've already written your book, created to relate living beyond religion, and that's what this podcast topic is all about. This podcast topic is all about you know, as, where you are now and where you were, you know you talked about. You know the anxiety, the anger, and then you know, then it took you to hit rock bottom, and it usually does take people to hit rock bottom. You know for them to say you know what it has to be more to life than this.

Cassandra: 20:34

And I used to always ask myself the question you know, like you indicate, it's not about religion, it's about relationships and I used to always ask the question how can I have a relationship with you, Lord? And he said, well, how do you have a relationship with your best friend? I'm like, oh, you spend time with them. I'm like, oh, okay, so I must have to read the word, as you indicated be around individuals like-minded that have that relationship, have a mentor, and I know you had one, as when you were young, you had an older person that mentored you. You had indicated who has passed away now, but she spoke in your life and it sounds like she made a major, major impact on your life.

Desiree: 21:22

Yeah, she prayed for me. I think that's the thing that really left the impression for me. She always prayed for me and she was always there in every season, even when I wasn't going to church, even when I wasn't doing what I was supposed to be doing, even after I had my baby. She just was consistent, yeah, very inspirational into how I want to love other people.

Cassandra: 21:52

Right. So that's why you talk about why mentorship is so great, because of what she had done for you. So, in other words, you're just paying it forward. So right now in your life, if you look back at your late 20s, what would you tell yourself today?

Desiree: 22:14

Wow, I would tell myself a lot of things, but I think I would really help myself. I would tell myself that God is telling the truth, that I am who he says I am and that, even though it didn't look like there was a good plan for my life, that he had great plans for my life. So I think the most important thing is just to because really everything comes out of being known that we're loved by him and knowing that he really has our best in mind, because I really never believed that.

Cassandra: 22:59

Yes, yeah, yeah, and especially, uh, based on the disability that you and I'm not saying you have it now, it's just that you had and, like I said, I'm like God how can you do this to me? You know if you love me, but what you've done was you acquired a relationship and knowing that it's all in his plan, Like he knows you're in before you're beginning, in his plan, like he knows your end before your beginning. And you have a scripture that I really like 2 Corinthians 4.16. You said therefore, he said therefore, we do not lose heart, though we are cast wasting away, yet inwardly, we are being renewed day by day. And why is it that particular scripture you really that spoke to?

Desiree: 23:54

you. You know, it's kind of interesting because the older I get, you know, our bodies start getting worn out and we, you know they start decaying and but yet my spirit is renewed. I feel so alive and young inside and it just presents such a picture. It presents that picture of what God, what a relationship with him, does for us.

Cassandra: 24:47

That's, that's good, that's good. Hmm, that's that's good, that's good.

Desiree: 25:01

Uh, your, your, um, your mom. Did your mom ever think about getting the implants? Or they weren't around then. They weren't, really weren't around for her. And by the time they were she was old enough where I don't think it felt possible for her. You know, yeah, because it's a lot and it's not a perfect fix. There's a lot of work that goes along with it and even now I it's not a perfect fix for me. I get very tired. Listening is a lot of work for me because it's not a natural thing.

Cassandra: 25:25

And.

Desiree: 25:26

I still don't understand the way a hearing person would, so there are a lot of things that come with it as well. So, and it's not a quick fix, so I don't think she felt it was something for her.

Cassandra: 25:41

Okay.

Desiree: 25:42

All righty.

Cassandra: 25:44

So you have just been very resilient in the face of adversity, and I think resilience is key because I don't know anyone that's not had adversity. We all go through trials and tribulations and even your relationship building, and you broke free from those self-imposed limits through your faith that you had limits, through your faith that you had and anything. I love the fact and I am a believer I have a relationship with God. But you talked about fear and many times, excuse me, I still fear and I'm like a good example is the book that I wrote Is your Way, in your Way, and it took me so long to write that book because of fear. I didn't know what to say, I didn't know what people would think I'm more concerned about what they would think and if it were not for the grace of God and the relationship that I've had with God, the book would not have been written, because I felt in my heart of hearts that he would not leave me alone. He kept gnawing on me. I couldn't get it out of my spirit, year after year after year after year, and then, when COVID came, I'm like okay, all right, you spoke to me, I'm going to do it.

Cassandra: 27:13

So it's, and plus the dreams that we have. I think many of them come from God. You know he wouldn't give it to us if he didn't Excuse me, hmm. So I just want to thank you for your vulnerability. I want to thank you for the gifts that God has given you, how you're using it for his glory, and I know you will continue to be a blessing to many. So, as life moves on, you have anything like like, if I say Desiree, what's next for you? What's next for you in your life?

Desiree: 27:55

You're thinking Well, I am. I am working on the study guide and I am working on another book, but I really want to get into the speaking aspect of things because I think it's a gift that I can speak the way I do and, yes, for several reasons, you know, between the hearing loss and and just even the fears that it's not, it's out of my comfort zone completely, but so I really would love to do more speaking. I'm really enjoying the podcast guesting and and being on the different podcast and just expanding that territory and I I'm trying to take time to dream but also let the Holy Spirit lead one step at a time and to have that balance. So I know that he has more. So I'm taking one step at a time. I have my website and I blog and I do book reviews and all those kinds of things. So I have my hands in a lot of different places and just seeing where God takes it.

Cassandra: 29:03

Okay, okay. So how can my listeners get in touch with you so?

Desiree: 29:08

how can my listeners get in touch with you? The best way is through my website, which is wwwarenewedcreationcom. You can sign up for the blog post and the newsletters and keeps you up to date on everything going on.

Cassandra: 29:23

Okay, now do you do your own blog, do other people do blogs and you post them on your website, or you just do them all yourself.

Desiree: 29:33

I mainly do them all myself, but when I have other writers that are coming into their own, I have guest bloggers on there sometimes to help encourage them in their gifting too. Yeah, that's good, that's good.

Cassandra: 29:43

You're giving back, that's good. That's good, that's good. You're giving back, that's good. Well, any last parting words that you would like to share with my listeners, those who are stuck for, those who are in their way, and you know, and my mission is to empower a generation of women, to mitigate those barriers that's preventing them from living their best life. You know, I always say, when it's time for me to go, I want God to say well done, my good and faithful servant, and I don't want my cup half empty.

Desiree: 30:36

I want it full and overflowing that.

Desiree: 30:37

I have done all that I was ordained to do, because that's when I realized I'm more at peace in this crazy world. Amen, I agree with that completely and that's my heart desire too. I think the biggest thing is, I would say, if you're stuck, don't be ashamed to acknowledge that, to be able to acknowledge that, to bring it to God and to ask him what's keeping you stuck and to allow him to show you that and to bring along other people. You know, reach out to people. I'm happy to talk to people too If they want to reach out. I love getting the personal messages and things and talking through anything that people need to talk through. Or, you know, pray with people and don't give up. That's my biggest motto is never give up. You know, pushing through, keep working through it and don't let the enemy have his way.

Cassandra: 31:29

Keep working through it and don't let the enemy have his way. Okay, I love that. One more thing that just dropped in my spirit. Would you mind saying a prayer for my listeners as you, because you know what they're going through and why they've tuned into this, this podcast, today?

Desiree: 31:46

Sure, I would love that. Yeah, father, thank you so much for today. Thank you for each and every listener that's listening here. Lord, I pray over their minds and their hearts. That you would renew their minds, that you would transform their hearts, father, that you would open their eyes to whatever is keeping them stuck right now and hindering them from doing all that you've called them to do. Lord, I pray that you would free them today, in the name of Jesus. Lord, bring freedom, bring the right people around them to walk with them, to encourage them, to spur them on towards you, lord, and that you would give them that spirit of perseverance, father, that you would give them the strength to never give up and to keep walking with you in all that you've called them to do. In Jesus name, amen.

Cassandra: 32:34

Amen. What a great note to end this podcast today. Again, desiree, thank you. My listeners, that prayer and what you've heard today, I know that you are going to start transitioning to what it is that you were called to do. If you're open to it I always say that if you're open to it, what do you have to lose? So, with that said, please share this podcast. And if you've liked this podcast, I ask that you subscribe, hit, like and share it with your friends and family, and also just know that this podcast is on every podcast platform. Again, desiree, thank you. God bless and listeners, bye for now. Thanks, desiree.