Knightfalls Vale
Nerds and pop culture references galore. Three friends discuss whatever topic we or, hopefully at one point, the fans deem worthy of us 😆
Knightfalls Vale
Sonic adventure 2 🤣(with some deviation)
email us at knighfallsvale@gmail.com
What if video games and movies are more intertwined than we think? Join us on a hilarious journey through the realms of cinema and gaming as we unpack the nostalgia and excitement surrounding "Sonic 3" and "Mufasa." We revel in Jim Carrey's unforgettable turn as Eggman and laugh over the infamous initial design of Sonic the Hedgehog. Our discussion takes a mischievous turn with anecdotes from Christmas films featuring unexpected cameos, blending humor with heartfelt nostalgia. Through it all, we explore how beloved actors like Jim Carrey, Bill Murray, and The Rock have shaped our cinematic experiences.
Our wild ride through pop culture continues with a lighthearted exploration of CGI evolution, fueled by the audacious creativity of fan parodies and internet memes. We debate the chaotic and bizarre dynamics within the Sonic universe, comparing character powers and quirky personalities. Alongside, we fantasize about cinematic crossover potentials, like merging Fast and Furious with Transformers, while poking fun at Hollywood's portrayal of animal characters and the peculiar narrative choices in superhero flicks. Expect plenty of geeky humor and playful critiques that capture the essence of why these stories resonate with us.
Finally, we navigate the intriguing world of video game adaptations in film, pondering why some succeed while others falter. By reminiscing about classics like Mortal Kombat, Metal Gear Solid, and Resident Evil, we highlight the impact of character evolution and storytelling on player experiences. We engage in lively debates about the advent of game adaptations, the cultural phenomenon surrounding them, and the complex emotional journeys of iconic characters like Ellie from "The Last of Us." Join us as we celebrate the moments, stories, and characters that have left an indelible mark on our hearts and imaginations.
hello, all welcome to part two of the night falls veil podcast for the double feature. Double feature because and we also seen sonic 3. So, yes, very different movies, granted, but double feature time. Maybe we'll do more of these in the future, pending if we, if movies ever line up like this again, because that was funny, I heard that, totally funny, lying up. If movies ever line up like this again. Yeah, he heard lying though, lying up there. Okay, whatever, I didn't. We've just seen one Thunder, thunder, thunder.
Speaker 1:Really, really, you're going there versus where I was going, mufasa. I know I was going with the obvious one, that one, I'm sorry. So very fun, very fun. Apparently, I'm too old for my own good. Yeah, mr 1990s. Yeah, very fun. Sonic 3. Very fun, good movie. Very fun, fun, fun. Mufasa's, more the emotional type movie. This is the fun movie. Very fun. This one nostalgia baited everyone. Very fun. Anyone who has played Sonic Adventure 2 would thoroughly enjoy this movie.
Speaker 1:Maria, I'll be seeing this again, probably not this week, probably next week. What? Our third party member isn't available to see Tuesday movies, and this is one we all want to see, so we're probably going to see me. And member isn't available to see Tuesday movies, and this is one we all want to see. So we're probably going to Me and Ryan are probably going to see something else on Tuesday that we haven't seen. Oh, nick, he's not available for this. Well, because it's on Christmas Eve and he goes out of town for Christmas. Oh yeah, so we're going to see it. Does he go like far out of town or just state we're not going to see it this week? We're going to see it next week, when all three of us are available again? Oh, I see Fun movie. All the Sonic movies have been fun though. All of them. They've all been fun. They've kind of gotten better as they go, though, which is weird. Normally it's the opposite. You know, the only thing that screws with this franchise as far as being the best adaptation which sucks because he's also one of the parts of the movies is Jim Carrey Eggman.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm not being fat 100% of the time. Part of it. He wanted the fat suit, it's just they didn't give it to him in the first one, the second one I don't know what their deal was there. And then the third one, they didn't feel like, well, where are they going to make him fat Off, was there. And then the third one. It didn't feel like when are they going to make him fat Off of one going into two? He got trapped on the mushroom planet. Hold on, you didn't want your belly to make noise. That noise is okay, I was going for the belly drum. You couldn't make him fat from going from one into two because he stuck him on the mushroom planet. He wasn't going to get fat on mushrooms, he'd be just high on his ass if he ate some of them.
Speaker 1:Bitches, every movie. I'm done. I'm retiring my last movie. I need the money. He's still alive, he's not dead. There's no way you can't get rid of him Because of his mannerisms Are so legendary, which was advertised by him playing Both him and his grandpa In that dance.
Speaker 1:Yep, that was full on. Jim Carrey being Jim Carrey, yes, and we need more of that. Yep, yep. Well, come on. I could take another Jim Carrey Truman Show type movie, carey, yes, and we need more of that. I could take another Jim Carrey Truman Show type movie. Yeah, wouldn't that throw you for a loop for a second? There's certain I did go from one genre to another.
Speaker 1:There are certain actors that have just earned the right to just be themselves, jim Carrey being one of them. Bill Murray is one. He just is himself. The Rock has always been himself. So you know what I'm saying, bill Murray. You can't not let him be himself if he isn't himself. You're hiring Jim Carrey to be Jim Carrey. You're hiring Bill Murray to be Bill Murray. I think you're hiring the Rock to be the Rock Damn near Well they. You're hiring Bill Murray to be Bill Murray. I think you're hiring the rock to be the rock. Yeah, I'm near Well, they are now. Just like you're hiring Jack black to be Jack black. Yeah, oh God, yeah, no, it was actually an all right movie. You like that? Oh my God, I said it was all right. I watched my.
Speaker 1:My YouTuber guy just ranked Christmas movies and he watched it. He thought that movie was horrible. He hated that fucking movie. He hated that fucking movie. You know how Christmas movies are actually supposed to give you a message. Yeah, this one did that. Spell it correctly. Yeah, it's spelled Santa. Two messages Well, he said his movie's just Jack Black being Jack Black. They gave him nothing to work with. This movie's, just he hated the movie. That's the only reason I didn't even watch the movie. I just know it because it was on his tier list and he was talking about it.
Speaker 1:Well, I kind of like the Ben Stiller cameo. Oh God, ben Stiller was Satan. Oh Jesus. He fired Jack Black as a demon. Oh Jesus Christ. And then Jack Black turns into an angel. Won't that be some shit? The funny thing is, the little angel that he turns into on top of the Christmas tree kind of looks like his cartoon self from the Fuck Her Gently song.
Speaker 1:Okay, back to Sonic. Whenever Jay brings up a movie, that's like what the fuck? I gotta comment a little bit. But okay, characters are all lovable, but that's it. That's me being the Knuckles bro that I am. I love Knuckles.
Speaker 1:I like how we totally brush over Tails' genius. He made fully cloaking holograms. I did love the bit where Bonet Lord's pressing it and he just can't get a single fucking thing going. I just know you're right, though You're right, though Tails is genius is overshadowed. No, biplane, I'm not pissed at that. He got to fly a plane, he got to fly in a helicopter. Tails' genius is overshadowed by my teeth.
Speaker 1:Have muscles. You're going to look towards Knuckles, no matter what. Dude. Yeah, go ahead, raise him up. You know you want to Go ahead, raise them up. You know you want to. I want to get one. So Idris Elba can say it. I just know you, out of respect to hops, won't take them out of the box. No, I will not. You're that type. I'll never take them out of the box. Me, I'll take them out of the box once. No, no, no. Okay. Keanu Reeves actually finished Fucking casting, even though Revenge. Keanu Reeves actually finished, even though revenge. I'm like that's just John Wick.
Speaker 1:I made the joke to you during the movie. Hold on, does that mean it's to reverse? He was the dog and it killed his human. I made the joke. People need to stop killing Keanu. Keanu cares about. Yeah, he almost destroyed the entire Earth for it. They deserve to die Because they took the word my friend, my human. Yeah, it's kind of reversed.
Speaker 1:You loved the dog just because they said Well, oz, the fucking dog, you took my humans. I love how they give the dog subtitles. They didn't do that in the fucking dog. You took my humans. I love how they give the dogs subtitles. They didn't do that in the other ones. The only thing that made me pissed off about this movie the Guardian. It's like I should have fucking seen this coming a mile away after the Knuckles show.
Speaker 1:I still didn't like it. I got a kick out of the show. I knew he didn't like it because he gave the. I didn't like it. Yeah, because I knew I got a kick out of the show. I knew he didn't like it because he gave the. I don't like it, groan. Jay has the. I don't like it, groan, he does. Oh, that's the. I don't like it, groan. I gave it to the fiercest warrior. I know I gave it to the fiercest warrior. I know. Hey, sonic, that's the same groan I make every time you guys bring up the Hulk, isn't it? Uh-huh, yeah, except this is.
Speaker 1:It used to be Pete Davidson, but you've left him alone now because he did Barrage Goods. So you leave Pete Davidson alone now for a little bit. He's growing on me. I still can't watch an SNL skit with him, though I was like dude, are you tired or are you just on drugs? What else get with him? Though? I was like dude, are you tired or are you just on drugs? What's with the bags under your eyes? Are you tired? I did appreciate the.
Speaker 1:There was a joke going around. Pete Davidson looks like how you think Beetlejuice would look like if he was alive. So if they had done that in Beetlejuice 2 when they were showing him and the girl in the beginning, I would have found this appropriate. That whole Spanish scene in Beetlejuice threw me for a loop. It's like oh, his origin story is in Spain, what? Yeah, again another movie. We're in a CGI for this. It's pretty damn good. We bitched and complained enough that I fixed it there. I kind of set Matt up unintentionally Every close-up of the faces when they had the fur, for, well, their first Sonic design, that first Sonic design in that trailer, was like no Way to lead him into it. No, that's what he was trying to do. Yeah, so we're kind of there now.
Speaker 1:There was a rumor going around. It was like is there a possibility that Paramount released those images to get enough read to get them talking about the movie and not caring if people were bringing it up and never had the intention of doing it? Well, it really didn't take them that long to fix it. I know there's a theory. Yeah, yeah, think about how fucked up that would be. Fix it, I know. So like there's a theory. Yeah, yeah, think about how fucked up that would be, though, because imagine if someone really worked hard on that original design and they just used it to do that. They'd go hey, hey, you know Jim's shitty-ass, fucking Sonic design from Accounting? Give me that shit, put it out, jim. Hey, that's my Sonic design, do they like it? Oh, I think it's really bad the fact that you said Jim from accounting, no, because Jim Perry, somebody who would actually troll people that way. That was bad and, based on how comedic this entire franchise has been, that just feels like something they could have done. Put that shitty original rough draft design out there. See what they think. Okay, we're doing good, they're talking about the movie. There's no point in doing that. You have the 3D renderings of him being stuff. I'll get the good one out there. The funny thing is everything that they showed us for Sonic actually fucking happened. It was just a different render. The better render, the better render. Whatever Bender render, yeah, but we're not going to go there because then we're going to get Bender Rodriguez.
Speaker 1:Oh my god, I lost my train of thought now. What happened there? I don't know. I gotta run, I gotta go fast. What is that? What the fuck is that? That's a hedgehog.
Speaker 1:That's Sanic, that's Sanic, that's Sanic. You know that hand-drawn thing that they like to make fun of in memes. That's Sanic. You know that hand-drawn thing that they like to make fun of in memes? That's Sanic. You know what? Now that I see it, yeah, that's totally Sanic, drawn in 3D, if that's even a fucking name. Oh hell, no, all I did was open up Google. What the f? What, what, what? We could have gotten what's with Knuckles? I can't even. That's literally just a 3D render on top of an existing shot from of him close up, running from the first one, and they just made him red.
Speaker 1:I recognize this scene that tails. I love that tails. Holy shit. It's tails on crack. Holy shit. What did you do to yourself? Thank you, internet so much? No, we hate you and the internet, no. The internet wins when it makes parodies and memes, yes, then it wins.
Speaker 1:Okay, so the scene where the three jump out and land on the ground looking up at, yeah, sonic Heroes, where they throw each other? No, just the scene from the movie. It just has a picture of Shadow with a pencil. I once saw him kill three men in a bar with a pencil and he proceeds to kick everybody's. I once saw him kill three men in a bar with a pencil and he proceeds to kick everybody's. Thank you, internet so much.
Speaker 1:Okay, guys, let's go. There's no way he can take all of us on at once. Everybody goes down and says, okay, he can take all of us on, besides adding shadow. I mean you can take all of a sudden Besides adding shadow. I mean you can't really talk about the story much. Oh, the story is fine, it's just a run of the mill story. He has nothing griped with what they did with shadow. He does not have teleportation powers without a chaos Emerald. They made it a part of him though. Teleport, teleport they made him have chaos energy as a whole. Yeah, they made him have chaos energy as a whole.
Speaker 1:What are you doing with Rouge? Hey, read it aloud. No, I wouldn't Read it aloud. Oh my god, oh my, read it aloud. You can't do that. You have Rouge the Bat on there. You have to read it aloud because it's something sexy.
Speaker 1:Rouge is telling Shadow tell Amy, you like her, or I'll tell her. And Shadow responds tell her and I'll tell your stupid boyfriend that you spy on him while he bathes. Okay, rouge is definitely your side B. You like what you see? No, because he would be secretly putting on a show because he doesn't care. This dumbass would be stroking it off just for her just doing some of this shit. He'd be doing the Morbius dance in the shower.
Speaker 1:Morbius makes his way into every fucking episode. Man, you want Morbius, or do you want? Who's the other one that fucking did the dance? Fuck it. No, no, finn, finn the human. You do the Finn human Shake your ass in your underwear. Fringe, fringe, uh-huh. Do you not like where the conversation went? No, the sales of the Sonic games have skyrocketed. In 2024, apparently, the video game market currently has a Sonic boom. Oh no, I told you it was cringe. You know what they did for Shadow's character in Sonic boom. You wanna know why he's pissed and angsty? They broke his skateboard. That's why Shadow is who he is in that show.
Speaker 1:No, a random. I could not tell you what fucking game it is. I believe it was GameCube, but my fondest memory of a Sonic game was fucking. Jay could probably tell me the name of the game too. Man, the game basically starts when you're Sonic and you jump out of this like plane or something and you're surfing some fucking streets and it's playing that fucking jam and it's like man. That's my Sonic memory. Sonic's escaping from gun because he was mistaken for Shadow. You know exactly what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1:Sonic Adventure 2. You're surfing Sonic's escaping from Gunn because he was mistaken for Shadow. You know exactly what I'm talking about. Sonic Adventure 2. You're surfing through the city on a piece of the fucking thing. That is it, that song.
Speaker 1:I love the name of that song. It's one of the most iconic songs. We will escape from the city. Escape from the city, yep, yep. I remember it to this day. It's a fucking jam. It's a fucking jam right there.
Speaker 1:Oh my god, the intro just to the Sonic movies gets me every time where it's the rings instead of the stars for the Paramount Mountain. It gets me every time here, just for you. Oh copyrights, yes, but that's the song though. That's the song though. But uh, football memes have been killing me now too. Whenever fucking a lion Lions running back is running, they just put rings in front of him.
Speaker 1:You disappointed me. I did not need to know that. Ben Knuckles is out. Somebody should pay more attention to the fantasy football team. That's fine, I was losing. Oh shit, I got what one. Win, two, two, two. Yeah, you won. That's fine. I was losing. Oh shit. I got what? One win Two. Yeah, you won a second one. So I think you beat Nate, because Nate probably didn't even start a team Going. Nate Probably did what I did when he's tied with his brother for worst record in our history. Not hard to do. Oh my god God, it's hard to talk. Oh my god God, it's hard to talk about Sonic.
Speaker 1:The story is nothing like mind-blowing. This is the first movie that they actually attempted to dip into what is considered Sonic lore. I didn't make the Akira reference when he was on the motorcycle. So there was that too. Everybody knew about the Akira slide. Yeah, they've been doing that a lot lately. So there was that too. Well, everybody knew about that Akira slide. They've been doing that a lot lately. That's a thing. At least if you have a motorcycle in a movie, they're going to do the Akira slide. That's a worse one. The jumpsuit he was supposed to wear. Oh God, that's full-on furry. Oh God, that's full-on furry, oh God.
Speaker 1:You know what I still don't understand about the Sonic movies the rings being teleportation devices. Yeah, you need to collect enough of them to be able to teleport. No, you don't even fucking collect them. Where are they getting these rings from. He had a bag of them. He said the last one, so we'll see. They said that the last movie and the movie before. Where did Amy come from? By the way, that one's one I didn't know. Where did Amy come from? Yeah, as far as these movies go, we don't know. Well, I'm saying we're traditionally aware from the games Obvious. They kind of based it off of the comics, the Archie comics, which is an entirely different fucking beast. Like Archie, sonic is so overpowered they have him beating the Flash, oh my god. Not to mention we also have a version of Sonic that is so evil, it's retarded, almost literally.
Speaker 1:I'd fight the speeding ticket in court, but I don't think they got to accept. Gotta go fast as a medical condition. I've seen that one. Gotta go as a medical condition. Do you know how many times we've seen Maria dying this year? We have the Shadow Origins game. Well, sonic, shadow Origins, oh yeah. Then we have the movie and everybody reeling it in because of the old video games. We're in the warehouse business. That's kind of funny, you're too. It went right to the. It went right to the thing. Yeah, it went right to the video. I am now forklift, certified, forklift, certified, certified I have become Forklift certified. Forklift certified, I have become a warden of the Forklift. Hey, that's very Robotnik Shadow, bad guy at first, turns good guy at the end. That's part of it. Oh, there you go. That's a traditional story. That's a hero. I'm kind good guy now.
Speaker 1:I'm kind of hoping they actually do make this into one of those franchise movie series type things where each, like I've seen a meme that said we're going to get Sonic 4. We're going to get Shadow, the Hedgehog movie, we're going to get Chaotix, we're Chaotix. Where we get Vector, the Crocodile, esper and the bee. You know, you know a random thing, not kind of random, but watching the movie in my head, seeing Shadow and Knuckles and Tails and Sonic. I'm sitting there watching the movie. I'm like debating the whole time. Honest to God, truth, I'm debating the whole time. This one's just for Jack. Oh no, oh no, don't show that. To Dean her on the screen. Nope, are you this fast, too late. I had to gotta go fast. Him and Amy are a ship, gotta go, gotta go. That kind of transitions, that transitions right into what I was going to say, that whole movie. Out of the four hedgehogs, I am debating which one, which one's the most cute. And then the post-credits scene just blows me away for the cuteness. Hold on, hold, on, hold on. That's how I know you're not a full-on Sonic fan, because I was more blown away that they did an accurate Metal Sonic than getting Amy, because I knew I was getting Amy. I didn't know I was getting Metal Sonic.
Speaker 1:What did you fucking do now with the memes? How do you get a hold of Sonic the Hedgehog? You set out a chili dog. No, you give him a ring. Oh, wait, what do you mean? I'm trying.
Speaker 1:I'm a fan of Sonic. I'm sorry, amy, oh, don't Cute. Look at her. She's pink and she has a little hammer. She's cute. Oh, I was so happy for the hammer. I believe it's still one of the top Sonic's, one of the top things in Rule 34. Still, god don't, don't go there, amy. If she was a little bigger and Shut up, dean.
Speaker 1:There's so much fan art on the fucking internet of Sonic. What do you think half of the stuff I'm seeing is? It's the biggest. Why are you looking at it? It's on the geek website I use. Oh, no, rule 34.
Speaker 1:Sonic is just horrible, uh-huh. Luckily it's mostly PG, it's mostly fan art, but I understand where it's going. It's so bad. I'm mad Amy didn't talk, though. I was like talk, it'll probably give you some cute voice too. God damn it. Well, sonic 2 does. I think it's so bad. I'm mad Amy didn't talk. I was like talk, it'll probably give you some cute voice too. God damn it, it's gonna.
Speaker 1:No, I had an edgehog Fucking bastards. What would you do if you came over to my house one day and I had a cage? Mistake number one Going over to his house one day and I had like a cage and I was like Mistake number one. Going over to his house one day I made that mistake and I had a whole cage full of hedgehogs. What are their names? Dean, that one's, sonic, that one's. Hold on, do me a favor, go like this. What Does your mustache curl out? Are you calling me a robot or is it just handlebars? Why? Because I got a whole army of hedgehog pets. Well, as long as you're not going to TMNT them, I'm fine.
Speaker 1:Waterboarding in Guantanamo Bay Sounds great. If you don't know what either of those things are, don't talk about water when we're talking about Sonic. Oh my, because all I can hear is the fucking drowning song. It's like that, why, no, don't say that Bye. No, that's hurting her cuteness. It's making her oh, no, like I said, it's a step away from it, but it's there. No, no, I don't know.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to type in Thick Amy, no, no, you type in just Thick Amy. You're not going to get the Amy you want. Yeah, I'm getting my spot up there, god. You type in just Thick Amy. You're not going to get the Amy you want. Yeah, I'm getting my spot up there, god, I'm getting it back. Not at your current rate. No matter how many charities you donate to, you ain't getting up there.
Speaker 1:There aren't enough charities in the world. You couldn't even sodomize. I don't want to go back by my dad. You have to do more Make-A-Wish grants than John Cena. Good luck. Imagine being famous. How many Make-A-Wishes have we got? About ten today. Get the numbers up Any more. How many sick kids You're going to do the Wolf of Wall Street for your charities? Yeah, get them numbers up.
Speaker 1:I'm pretty sure if he ever said that when he's doing that, he chances on it, especially if he does the chess call Uh-huh, uh-huh, damn it, matthew McConaughey. I did a Wolf of Wall Street reference in a Sonic the Hedgehog Because he did it. Oh, mario Robb, he's going to have to get off of Wolf of Wall Street reference in a Sonic the Hedgehog Because he did it. Yeah, oh, mario Robbies, get off of Wolf of Wall Street, back on Sonic. No, it's because I was talking about we're on Route 34 with the fucking hedgehogs. Hey, how'd you like seeing Sun Sonic? Yeah, more than once. That was awesome and I love how I call him Sun Sonic.
Speaker 1:I know his one gripe of the movie how the hell were they able to breathe on the moon? They're aliens. I don't question that. That was the kid that kept talking in the movie. Yeah, he did. How did he breathe on the moon? I got a kick out of that. How did he breathe on the moon?
Speaker 1:There was a little kid in this movie that was a bigger critic than Matt. Oh yeah, the trilogies are over and all of a sudden it plays a commercial the worst trailer I've ever seen. What trailer was that? For what the fuck one was it? I think it was Lilo and Stitch. I think it was Lilo and Stitch. It's the worst trailer I've ever seen. Wow, the worst trailer I've ever seen. I've never hit a kid before. But the worst trailer I've ever seen. I've never hit a kid before, but A lot of kids this generation is.
Speaker 1:You know the what if he's? Yeah, you, jay, would you have looked at me if he said that was a horror? I want to see a Spider-Man trailer. You'd look like Dean. Stop making kids, would you?
Speaker 1:Oh no, now I found a sexy robotic. Are you donating your sperm to the bank or something? Now I found sexy robot Sonic. Oh boy, no, you didn't. No, metal Sonic sexy. Don't do it, it's already a robot. Don't do it. Don't do it.
Speaker 1:He's on the meme site. He's done it. Don't do it. He's on the meme site. He's done it to himself. I know he don't do it, he just don't do it.
Speaker 1:Anything you think could be hot is hot on the internet somewhere, for fuck's sakes. It's bringing me right to one of my favorite lines. The internet has made me want to destroy a deathclaw and a xenomorph in Bang Bang Fun Time, so I don't want to hear it. One you die of radiation. Another you die of acid. Oh my God, that would suck. Oh, that would suck, especially since you want them to blow you. Oh God, the Deathclaw's got the. Do you imagine that? No, didn't we ask him which one would do the blowing in the alien. Yeah, that's what I was about to say.
Speaker 1:Which one Is the one that blows you? The small one or the big one? I don't know. That little one's scary, it's got all them teeth on it, and then the other one's got they both have teeth. I know they do, but it's just the way it just. Oh boy, oh boy, it's getting worse. Man, I mean you could get bored by a snake, as in the bad guys too.
Speaker 1:Well, the fucking xenomorph, just it didn't pick any of that sound effect up. You were being very secretive with your. Well, the xenomorph, we're already there. The Xenomorph's tongue is literally made for just found in your butthole. I'm serious, that is not what I think of when I think of a Xenomorph, a butthole.
Speaker 1:Did I lose my seat up there again? God, that's implying you ever had one. You're the one that broke the fucking escalator. I'm the reason. No new souls.
Speaker 1:Am I going to Hasbin Hotel? Don't you say I'm already? You might be the fucking janitor at this point, don't you say I'm already there? We're already on the furry fucking department, so might as well go to Hasbin. He's down there too then. Yeah, he's your bartender. Fuck, he tells you're a loser baby. He calls me a power bottom. That rock bottom. Okay, no, hey, that is a show. That's your granddad's voice. Fuck, that is a show. That's your granddad's voice. What the fuck that is a show.
Speaker 1:I weirdly wonder if Matt would get any enjoyment out of. No, he just. Or Hell of a Boss. Hell of a Boss is worse. Here's poetic. Want to see me outperform a major comic movie? Guess when? Guess what movie it outperformed? For Sonic 1. Guess which comic book movie was out at the same time as Sonic 1. God, sonic's come out during two major movies, oh boy, and outperformed them both. Hmm, hmm, the Eternals. The Eternals, that's the one I was thinking. Batman, you're on the wrong track. Not Marvel, it was Birds of Prey. Oh, and Sonic 2 came out at the same time as Morbius. Well, I'm not surprised. We can't knock them for. And now this one came out at the same time as Kraven. Oh, aren't they turned down on purpose? Yes, it's like Archie's, the Archie comic-based video games and stuff.
Speaker 1:I think Grave would think the hedgehogs are a good hunt. Sounds to me all great. Sonic would be one of his best hunts. I'll hunt that thing. I'll hunt it. It's fast, but I will catch him. Sadly, though, he'd have to do the same thing he did to Spider-Man Wear him out, or just do what Shadow did and punch Donut Lord in the chest until he's knocked out forever. And then you see him at the end of the movie in a cast. Apparently he broke his arm. Yeah, like what the fuck? That's an injury.
Speaker 1:We didn't see coming. You didn't see that coming. You didn't see that. Damn it being mad at the same thought. You didn't see that coming. You didn't see that. Damn it being mad at the same bot. You didn't see that coming. I'm a fast guy. I'm a fast guy. I walked into that one. We ran, but Well, you didn't phase into it, not Barry, barry, that doesn't make me want a bowl of spaghetti.
Speaker 1:Why did you say reverse? You shouldn't have said flash. You're talking. You got memes in my head and I just thought of a meme I seen last night and me almost roll off the bed laughing. It's from the flashpoint when Barry's crying and reverse flash comes up to him.
Speaker 1:Barry, I got to tell you something. When you were about to get out With your first girlfriend, I jerked you off at super speed. So it was me. I'm like oh, my fucking god, that's a flashpoint. I jerked you off at super speed. Jerk, that is a flashpoint. Barry, you remember your first girlfriend? I jerked you off. Alright, that was pretty good. Thank you, marston. Right over there, sonic is where Gene and Gary killed me.
Speaker 1:Aw shit, I've seen that they did use the same lake. Uh-huh, you know, I still can't get over the donut lord, the fucking sweater. You should get that sweater, the donut lord. He was wearing a hat Immediately after that While eating donuts. Donut lord, or was it a muffin? I think it was a muffin. The life that those two live without them around is fucking hilarious. They got shit done. That shit done is one thing. Yeah, I feel so bad. I feel so bad for that dog. You took my humans. Oh, I love two.
Speaker 1:Come here Oz, warner Brothers nervous about Superman after private screening. It's kind of a mess. We can't have nice things, no, we can't. Hey, jay, if you want to see if Sonic 4 comes out, if you somehow see it before me or get some news and it's rumored that they kill Oz, would you tell me hey, don't go see it, don't go see it, don't do it. We can't even what they're like. No, d, don't. Don't they feel it though? Oh no dog would die off screen before they even try to kill the dog at all. It's like you know what they would do. The dog that plays dog died. So they're like, sorry, we can't have the dog in the next one. It just wouldn't be right. Oh, I'd be like where's Oz? Six? I don't even know if that's the same dog in all three movies. I wonder the way Hollywood is Where's Oz? Can't trust him with animals, for shit. Where's Oz? He lives inside of you now.
Speaker 1:Fuck man, we're past that reference. I know I had the opportunity again. Your father's gone. Hey, this movie brought a family and team almost as much as a Dominic Toretto movie.
Speaker 1:So Did you expect the fucking charger to pull up like let's do this. Getting to that point, let's do it, son. And somehow it's hard to not be a cool-ass scene to see the Oculus slide, but it's the fucking charger. And somehow the charger. Why would it not be a cool ass scene to see the Oculus slide? But it's the fucking charger. And somehow the charger says it can't do that, and somehow that charger is keeping us out. It's gone, though. It's gone. Somehow that charger is keeping up with Sonic and Sonic's like how'd you get your chargers fast? As me, I borrowed some of that fur and put it in my engine. Eggman still had one of your quills that just the word family is.
Speaker 1:So you know how many scenes I've seen of Optimus talking about brotherhood and family to the Autobots and then Bob's car charger pulls up. Bro, stop, stop having Bob pull up to everyone. You know what? What? Just for that. I hope that's the next collab transformer.
Speaker 1:Fast and Furious. I don't see. It's not out of the realm of possibilities. That's a sad shit. It's not Dom's Charger just being a, the next collab transformer where it's just Dom's Charger, you know, in vehicle mode and then it transforms and it's just Dom's head as the head mold. I used to live my life a quarter mile out of it. No, no, fucking Fast and Furious, not anymore. It hasn't been that way since Tokyo Drift. Tokyo Drift, why? Why?
Speaker 1:Fast and Furious is a fascinating franchise to me when you think about racing, racing, racing. Let's add some more guns, more guns. You know in Sonic 4? Let's make an action movie with Kane. That's something I actually love. Shadow got a gun, bam bam. He was shooting at Sonic too, bam bam.
Speaker 1:It didn't full on become an action movie until Dwayne got involved. True, even 4 wasn't bad in terms of racing it still had racing and plot but it wasn't like there was one big explosion in the movie. Michael Bay cried at that explosion because he was like, yeah, let me shoot more of those. But now you got Dom driving down the fucking dam and Jason Momoa being the most flamboyant I've ever seen him, even though Minecraft's gonna be the most flamboyant I've ever seen Jason Momoa. Guys cringe so bad as I said that to the little kid coming out the Sonic Theater when he has the freaking uh, I cringed so bad as I said that to the little kid coming out the Sonic theater when he has the freaking creeper hoodie on and he's just coming past us laughing while staring at us through his hood. I wasn't cringing. I wasn't cringing. I knew the reference Surprised.
Speaker 1:We didn't get that trailer in the movie. Did I what Minecraft? Yeah, didn't we? We didn't get that trailer in the movie. Did I what Minecraft? Yeah, didn't we. We didn't get the Minecraft one. We didn't get a Minecraft trailer, oh, no, they get in the Marcus little, yeah, but you didn't get the actual trailer. No, in either one of them. What the fuck.
Speaker 1:Hey, I wonder what's going to be better, minecraft or Borderlands? How much of Sonic Adventure 2 did you play A little bit? Did you get to the last boss at all? I might have. I think I did Remember the monster movie that Shadow and Maria are watching. I think so, that proto-four, that monster that's on there. That's the last boss. That Sonic and Shadow fight. That is the perfect life form that Gerald Robotnik makes based off of Shadow. Oh my god, oh man, I actually caught that and I was like, yes, I was kind of sad that's all we got of him, though, because it would have been cool to see them face him in space, where he literally becomes a part of the space station. Also, I don't know how hard it would have been for the space station.
Speaker 1:Do you know how they have the lights coming off? That shoot the laser In the game? That was a. That shoot the laser In the game. That was a part of the mustache, like it was like the solar panels. That was the bottom of the whole thing. I appreciate the solar panels mustache, that was better. The nose there was no reason for the nose, it was just a design, it was an antenna.
Speaker 1:I wonder what we're going to go with for, though. Now the bots, the bots okay, it was bots and Amy I just don't know what the plot's going to be. They're literally stealing from Sonic CD Sort of. They already did the Knuckles thing in 2. So now they're taking the other half of the story, metal Sonic being the villain. Metal Sonic, metal Sonic.
Speaker 1:The problem is, if I remember correctly, is Dr Robotnik made Metal Sonic and he very well could have designed one of these, the same way his grandfather designed the station, and they just mass produced it. Wow, that thought just came into my head and I can't complain about it at all, even though I'll be judged for it. I can't complain if Rouge was introduced in the fourth one and Scarlett Johansson voiced her. I'd be like backtracking through all the memes. Metal sonic is an evil robotic, robotic. I'd be like backtracking through all the memes. That's literally what it says for it. Metal Sonic is an evil, robotic duplicate of Sonic the Hedgehog and an enemy of Team Sonic.
Speaker 1:In the game, metal Sonic kidnaps Amy Rose, luring Sonic into danger. Sonic's goal is to stop Metal Sonic, stop Robotnik and rescue Amy. Wouldn't that be some shit if Sonic 4 starts just where the post-credits scene ended and they take Amy and run off Sonic. Damn, they just kidnapped her. Look at this fucking design. That was the movie. That's how happy I was. But again, if they go off that, I hope they do that plot so I can love the beginning of that movie. When Kristen Ritter got announced for the movie, they thought that she was facing Amy. I liked it.
Speaker 1:Dr Eggman created Metal Sonic. That's all I'm getting here. That opening of that movie would fucking kill me. Kidnapps, amy, sonic, damn, I didn't even get that bitch's name. Go save her. Let's go. Team Sonic. I'd love it, love it. I didn't even get her her name. If they called her, yeah, but then you'd get Knuckles saying who named this team? Who named this team? Your favorite thing is that entire movie, aside from Shadow, saying Every time you speak I just want to punch you. Team Sonic, team Knuckles.
Speaker 1:God damn cute hedgehogs. Do I have to bring her over here? Do I have to bring her over here? No, she is cute from a distance. I was like oh, she's so cute from a distance, can I go home? Now you are home, you can't go nowhere. I'm with Jax. Am I hearing her from a distance? He's going the distance. Oh, fuck Back to Disney. Well, matt was right. I mean, there's not much. It's weird.
Speaker 1:As much as we all really like the movie, we don't like going into heavy spoilers. We spoil tangents and tidbits, but as much all really like the movie there's. We don't like going into heavy spoilers, we spoil tangents and tidbits, but as much as we like the movie, there ain't that much to talk about. Most of our long discussions were going to be with our characters. I mean, was it really fun? I'll tell you what we did, a lot better than I thought we were going to do after doing the Mufasa. We've almost talked for 45 minutes straight of random bullshit and the movie mixed in. Yeah, you said you didn't even expect this much random bullshit. No, and there weren't the gist and it's all Matt's fault with the memes. I have many gripes. I didn't have that many gripes, gripes, I mean Shit. I thought it was a fun movie. I'm trying to think of anything that bothered me and nothing really bothered me. As far as the live-action adaptation of the storyline for Sonic Adventure 2, I liked it.
Speaker 1:Based off of video games that didn't originally have much of a story, it was just a racing puzzle game. Sonic Adventure and Sonic Adventure 2 were the first games to actually give Sonic a story and lore I'm saying the arcade, original ones. However, the most hilarious thing about that is Sonic Adventure 2 is the only one that actually comes off, because Sonic Adventure was the first technical 3D. And I say first technical because technically you already had 3D versions of Sonic games but nobody accepted them, like those bonus stages. Or I think it was Sonic Pinball 2 that we even had a 3D version of, where we got a successful 3D version of, where we got a successful 3D Sonic game, and the story of it was Chaos, this water looking thing that apparently drew power from the Chaos Emeralds, or was a what the hell is it called? Or was a? Uh, what the hell is it called? Elemental, no, ethereal, what's it called when you're basically some primal, primal Force? Well, we all like that. One thing that would be interesting to discuss it's Sonic is actually a video game franchise that is actually successful.
Speaker 1:Most video game properties turned into movies. Suck, you want to label them off. I literally pulled it up just for this. I'm like okay, first one, borderlands. So we're going in reverse order. Got it? Reverse order? Yeah, no, it's not. It's just Google is searching video game movies. I'm just named Borderlands. Yeah, assassin's Creed oh boy, I think they're still going in reverse order. It could have been so much better than that movie. How, how do you fuck up Assassin's Creed? And it's Michael Foxbender too. That's the sad thing. This one I didn't. Resident Evil Welcome to Raccoon City. I did not hate that one Because that one tried to do its best for the games, but it sandwiched Three of them into one.
Speaker 1:Why are you sandwiching all these games? I had to ask you about that. It was sandwiched one, two and three Into one movie and it turned Leon Into a bumbling idiot. You should probably clock in how many times I said hey, wait a minute, say him. I was like wait a minute. Did Matt see that one? Yes, I did. That was like one of our first pre-COVID movies after COVID movies. No, it was after they started opening shit up again. That's one of the movies that we started watching, where the podcast started to become a major idea. So we didn't record on that one. Well, we started in 2022. Yeah, we didn't record on that one, but I checked that out. We need an anniversary of.
Speaker 1:But again, I actually like that one, but even though I didn't like Jill in there either, because no one is girl player in Apocalypse. No one is that Jill. Ready Player One is listed. That was fun. Ready Player One was actually fun. It's not a video game. It's listed. It's listed here. The only reason it's listed as a video game is because of how many video game references they put in there Modern, yeah, tomb Raider. I didn't like it. That's because I am not even actually a Jolie.
Speaker 1:The real sad part about it is you actually really like the reboot games and they didn't use that's who they should have used and they didn't use her and it pissed me off and I just, oh god, there's so much bias there but I can't know. I don't know if I like the movie or not, but there's bias with Monster Hunter. I actually liked it. But how I like the movie or not, but there's bias with Monster Hunter. I actually liked it, but how they did it threw me off so much. I was like why did you make an Isekai movie? Because part of Monster Hunter is Isekai. I don't remember it being that way. The original games weren't, but they kind of delved into it when you got spin-offs with other characters.
Speaker 1:Never mind, we passed up our anniversary date November 16th, 2022. There's only a couple more notable ones. I mean, mila Jovovich was in it, so that's where my bias comes in. Now this one's divisive the Uncharted movie. Uncharted's divisive the Uncharted movie. Uncharted's divisive Gladiator would have been our anniversary. What do you think of Uncharted Jay? Uncharted was divisive Because some people did not like Tom Holland.
Speaker 1:I really liked the movie. You didn't like Sully. Mark Wahlberg is Sully. I didn't like Sully. Someone didn't like it. Mark Wahlberg as Sully. A lot of people didn't like Mark Wahlberg as Sully. I think that was a Matt thing. He doesn't look like Sully and he can't wear a mustache One of the chief features of Sully. With the mustache, yes, with the gray beard that goes with it. I mean the original, because Uncharted's gone back in time where it's called Younger Sully. Yeah, it's like that's not Mark Wahlberg, okay, no, I really liked the movie, but it did almost the same thing that Raccoon City did. Yeah, honestly, mark Wahlberg's a bigger douchebag than Sully is in the video. Yeah, did anyone help my bias?
Speaker 1:I gotta put my bias aside, but I didn't mind Tom Holland playing a younger Nathan Drake. I'd be fit. It's a young Nathan Drake. The difference is you wouldn't necessarily be able to age the same way that Nathan Drake did. The issue is that Tom Holland's just tiny. That's true. That's the biggest issue with it. Other, I can't give him shit for that. I've never seen this one. I can give him shit for being tiny. I give Jesse shit all the time. I've never seen this one. I've never watched it fully, but I enjoyed it for the most part. I heard it was pretty good. Actually it was Gran Turismo.
Speaker 1:Gran Turismo, I know what you're saying. It's not a video game. I know Gran Turismo is a video game, but the problem with this is it spawned from a biopic. It's not literally a video game movie. What the fuck did they do there? It's a biography. It's a biography about the guy who literally became Eraser from playing Gran Turismo. Yeah, it's based off the true story of what happened. It's not like it was based on the game itself. Well, it gets lumped in the video game movies. Yeah, same with Ready Player One. It has video games in it. That's the concept that it's going with.
Speaker 1:On Google, we can't knock it. It is a good movie, but it wasn't necessarily good. No, dane, not arguing with you, you're just saying the movies that come up. We're arguing with Google's concept of video game movies. Well, remember, I've seen Gran Turismo. My sometimes more basic logic Grant and Theresa is a video game. But what you're saying is I get it, the movie is not based off the video game. Oh, anything else, it's got some dragons here. I don't know what we like. That's like um, fuck you, google, it's not a board game, it's not a video game, it's actually not even a board game. Think about it. I can't even label it. Not a board game, it's actually not even a board game. Now that I think about it, I can't even label it.
Speaker 1:The Hitman movies were alright. They were nothing the right game about. That's better. They're alright. Warcraft, that wasn't bad. That movie was a lot better than I expected it to be. It wasn't.
Speaker 1:Oh, fuck you. They got Free Guy in here. Fuck you, that's straight up a video game. That's as video game movie as it gets. Uh-huh, detective Pikachu, sure, I guess you can get that. Do you know what that one actually counts? Because it was a video game. The problem is that that is not how the game works.
Speaker 1:No, super Mario Bros Really good. Great Might be the best. Super Mario, the best video game adaptation, out Even over Sonic and them? That's what I wonder. Eleven, I'm dead tired. Yeah, that's good, it's fine. I'm just laughing at the fact that you had to smack yourself in the face to keep going. I'm not going to ask him to do it. Oh Jesus, you're not going to ask Krampus to hit you in the face. No, I don't need sluggers much.
Speaker 1:Five Nights at Freddy's was fine. I can't wait for him to actually watch the movie, to see why we say that I'll get to it and I liked more. Sure, that's his famous last words. What I'll get to it, yep, I'll get to it. He only says that because of Vox Machina I'll get to it. Well, the problem is some random anime just pops in. It's my attention span. This is a movie. Maybe I'll get to it. I'm going to be in Christmas fever now, so Christmas movies are going to be on. The first movie I've got to watch is Santa Claus. It's only taken us three years to get through Critical Role. Oh, my Randomly put on the Christmas music. Oh, my Randomly put on the Christmas music from Critical Role. Let's see, if it happens, what's next. Just a couple, that's it. Five Nights at Freddy's was fine.
Speaker 1:Okay, yeah, that one was at least heavily tied in with the creator of the game. Funniest thing about that was when they're like we got a 69. Right now, right now, no, back in time, oh, great, five Nights at Freddy's. I don't remember that line. No, I don't remember that it was in there, it was from the movie. I believe Sometimes Jay's brain just takes. It was from the movie, I believe. That's funny, I don't know, sometimes Jay's brain just takes a vacation. I've seen the movie once and I don't even remember the line. I don't remember the line, whatever. Then there's Mortal Kombat. I like Mortal Kombat.
Speaker 1:That one is definitely not a good adaptation. I like the movie, though the original movies are a better adaptation of the video game. We've only got one to base off the movie, though the original movies are a better adaptation of the video game than You've only got one to base off the new franchise for, I'm sorry, I like that new one I. It's not that I don't like it, and the concept is fine because we know that the elder world is trying to cheat. That's all fair.
Speaker 1:And the second one is introducing Shao Kahn. No, I, that's not who we know you care about. In the movie there's a lot no. But Sindel, oh, sindel, mommy, sindel, oh God, but uh, shiva, jade, oh Jade, the pole, I'm done, I'm out, I'm done. Her weapon is on the floor. You didn't do that on purpose. That's not fair. That's not fair. That's completely fair. That's not fair. God damn it.
Speaker 1:Back on, we started talking about Jade, fuck man. No, at least it got you off of Amy. Holy, I don't need to look at you no more. I'm sorry, amy, you're still. It's so hard. You realize.
Speaker 1:She carries a giant hammer with her. She basically has the strength of Thor. Then she putsokes me. So I'm winning either way. It's not the power you like, and she ends up with shadow, not knuckles. It's fucking me, that is.
Speaker 1:Look at that parry, that's a two-pocket. That parry is not helping, honestly. No, it's not. It's the only way they were available. I have a comment and I'm gonna save it for after the fucking thing, but I do have a comment and I'm gonna save it.
Speaker 1:So you're saying Sonic stays as a bachelor for the rest of his life? No, he gets rude. I said Sonic not Knuckles. Well, amy's in the Black Dudes. I said it. That was my fault. It's right there, black Dudes with highlights. Ah, apparently, apparently Rodney, he was trying to gun Sonic Downer in the street. In an open street. He was doing drive-bys. Oh fuck, I know I knew it was going to go somewhere so I didn't want to do it. No, it's all about Black Eye, but you're the one who started the jokes. I just meant In a way, I don't know, I don't know who took that down that road. Well, jay kind of did with the jokes, but no, I used to debate with Our other buddies About Mortal Kombat.
Speaker 1:You know, jj is a Huge Mortal Kombat guy and his biggest gripe with the movie was he didn't like that. They made an original character as the main character. He hated that. That was his biggest gripe. You know what the saddest part about that is? He will never show up in the games.
Speaker 1:They created an original character that was tied to an origin character. Yeah, and there was still yeah and yeah, we'd still not see Barj's character. Right, right, came to hell to save his hand. Yeah, descendant. Yeah, I wanted to say ancestor and I was wrong.
Speaker 1:Most fun thing about that, that shit was they. Just the fact that they just killed. I mean, technically they do. Yeah, that's probably the biggest crime is killing Goro this early. What if he's throwing his tiger buddy Kintaro. Next, there he is.
Speaker 1:Kintaro Isn't even the reason for Jax losing his arms. Oh, this was, oh, okay, not changing that mythosis. One thing I didn't like, though, because he's one of my favorites in Epistemic Gabe no effort, and barely tried with Reptile. That bothered me. I'm like he didn't even lose his arms in the original movies. The fuck is that he had his. He still had both of his arms in the first movie, and in the second movie he was just going through tests and he did get them torn off, though by who? He wasn't Shiva, oh, I believe. I don't remember him being in the movie until they went to go get him. Who basically gave us Armageddon? Yeah, but I don't. I recall Raiden telling Sonia to go get him, but you never saw him lose his arms in the movie. I don't recall. Looks like I'm re-watching. I might have to too at some point, but they threw in a lot of. We'll do it with Matt, because he does his thing before each movie. Oh, definitely, hold on.
Speaker 1:Did you watch Sonic 1 and Sonic 2 before we did? I don't own Sonic 2. I couldn't find it. No, I don't own Sonic 2. I couldn't find it. No, I couldn't find it anywhere. To get it, amazon, I'd have to buy it, but by the time I was doing it I wasn't going to get it. Do you have a Paramount account? I bought the Knuckles DVD, so I didn't. You have the Knuckles DVD? The Knuckles DVD? I don't think he's watched it and it's his show. It's a violation of the second movie, right, mortal Kombat. And I don't believe so, carl Urban, as Johnny Cage is going to slap. He's going to slap 1897. You're making me feel old. Whatever 90s boy, 1997? I was like three years old. I was Whatever 90s boy, 97?, 1990. I was like three years old, I was a little toddler, I was seven.
Speaker 1:The Earthrealm Warriors retreat to seek allies. Sonya Blade enlists the help of her special forces partner, jax. All we got man. You know what? You can't hate them old classics, though, because whenever a motherfucker's gonna fight the narrator, I hear that shit like oh shit. That is one song that was created for the first movie that they just sold. If we were in a bar and, for some reason, a jukebox had that song and someone played it, you'd be like B? No, no, I'd be like why do I think you and JJ would start a fight? No, no, come on. Jj breaks a bottle and you're just over there, fiskey JJ, you're actually. You're just over there fiscally. Jj's actually killing people. It's a fatality that game's ruined so many generations, fatality.
Speaker 1:I'm actually excited for the second one. It's good you have high hopes. As long as we get into the actual tournament, it'll be fine. Yeah, goddammit, I didn't get off the track. Another funny-ass thing Kano wins.
Speaker 1:They used some character. I was like when I see Nitara fly in, I'm like y'all using Nitara Jesus, because you don't want to use the big names. If you're doing a two, you use the big names in the fight. At least you're not putting what the fuck his name is, the Aztec Khan or whatever the hell his name is. I like Koro Khan, even though it was kind of Timu Shao Khan. Koro Khan was great. I can't even remember the story for him. He was one of the descendants of Khan. The descendants, yeah, I can't remember if he got the title or whatever, but he was just the one that took over God. I can't remember the first one, like an alternate Earth or what, because I know they were doing a fucking. He became Khan.
Speaker 1:Was Baraka in there? I can't remember Baraka's, not in the first one. He's going to be in the next one. Okay, that's for Brock, who else I'm trying to remember? Are they going to bring in Noob in the second one, or Nook? It's a possibility. I believe you would right away. Okay, we lost Sub-Zero in the first one. I haven't heard anything if they're going to bring in good Sub-Zero. That's the thing I didn't know. What about mocap? I'm not going to fucking put mocap in here as a joke. It would be the Best motherfucking reference If they did, though, because they have Johnny, right? John R R Martin and Johnny have one of his fights In one of the movie studios, and you have a mocap guy just in the background Doing fighting poses.
Speaker 1:I haven't heard anything about the robots. I haven't heard anything about those guys. Yet I've just got these obscure Robot ninjas. I've got these obscure characters. You remember fucking Meech or what the fuck was his name? Dorian or Darian or something.
Speaker 1:That dude had the club on his hand. He had fucking flies around him Probably smelled like shit. What the fuck was his name? Dramon, what the fuck was his name? The weird part is that we're getting Quan Chi and Shang Tsung Holy shit, it's Quan Chi At the same time. That's always felt a little too much. Both of them are rulers of another world. Aren too much? Well, both of them are rulers of another world, aren't they? Quan Chi wasn't always Yep, yep, it was Dramon. I remember it was Dramon that motherfucker had flies flying around him and shit Because he was skinned alive.
Speaker 1:No, I shouldn't do this. No, it's an honor. It's an honor. He's not confirmed to be in it, but I hope they put Darius in that motherfucker so I can go to work. Whoa, you win Mortal Kombat 2. You did, I can't wait. That shit killed me. Whenever Darius wins Mortal Kombat 2 liked the game.
Speaker 1:Darius wins Striker, I don't know. I'll put Striker in there. Are you going to put the cop in there? I'll put Striker. I've seen too many memes of Striker beating on Jax and they say how accurate Mortal Kombat is. I'm done, man, I can't do memes. The internet kills everything. And the fatality where he steps on your neck, right, I can't Mortal Kombat. Alright, let's end this quick with our top. Are you going to break the glass? What an emergency. It's an emergency, top ten, emergency, top ten because, holy shit, even I'm running, even I'm getting a little tired, and that don't happen much. That's because I have lack of sleep For this one.
Speaker 1:We did top 10 video game characters in honor of Sonic the Hedgehog. No criteria, just video game characters, male, female, whatever. So let's go. Should be Jay or you. You want me to go first? Oh, jay's looks gonna be great. I have a lot of hope for this. He's like don't you too much hope, I'm gonna start 10 as a fucking joke anyway. Oh great, here it comes. It showed up in the movie.
Speaker 1:I put so much time and effort in Adventure 2 just because of these little bastards, the Chowls. You know how much time and effort I made put into trying to get a Shadow and a Sonic Chow. Oh good, them little bastards, hatch your own eggs. Oh my god, it sucked. You had to replay levels just to get certain shit Rescued the little animals and the little shards from the enemies. Chows. Rescued little animals and little shards from the enemies Chows, chow, chow. It kind of sucks that. That's literally how you say their name Chow Chow. My god, you can't.
Speaker 1:Not like Chows, I like Chows, Nothing wrong with Chows. There's a Sonic character called uh Green. Not like Chow's, I like Chow's. Nothing wrong with Chow's. Oh, there's a Sonic character called uh Cream. Yeah, cream and Cheese. Cheese is the Chow, oh my god. Oh shit, she's a little bunny. Her ears are in reverse. Oh yeah, yep, I think I remember, I do remember now. Oh boy, that'd be kind of hilarious if she shows up in the. Oh yeah, I think I remember, I do remember now, oh boy, that'd be kind of hilarious if she shows up in the next movie too. You got one female character. You might as well give us another. Aside from Rouge, yeah, give us the triple feature, triple feature. I've had enough of this double feature.
Speaker 1:Number 10, dean. Well, number 10 is where I always cop out, but uh, 10 is Melina from Mortal Kombat. Everyone's like Jesus Christ. Dean Always picks Melina because I love Melina. I don't know why, and I know she's got them teeth. I was going to say a big mouth, but sure, he's tired, but he's still got zingers. He's still got zinger energy. That's the most important. That's where you're going to get more zingers. His brain's quicker on it, but Melina's great. That's the scary part. I know that is, it's just lack of filter. Kay's going to be surprised for a second, but then he's like no, never mind, she's earned her spot. She might climb eventually.
Speaker 1:But I tied Malina at 10 with Eve from Stellar Blade. You're like, oh okay, dean had to get her. Eve's gonna climb. I just don't know what's climbing in his head. Oh, she's climbing a ladder Me.
Speaker 1:That game has photo mode now, so it's dangerous, them fuckers. You know she slaps you if you stare at her ass. I know she does. She's pushing the camera away. I'm like, there you go. It's great. It's just gotta be faster. Gotta go fast. That was the joke. I gotta go fast. As much as I love that game, that was gonna be one of the biggest climbers if we did top 10 games, because that would probably get to like top 6. No, no, no. If you're talking business climbers, you've got to go ice climbers. Oh Jesus, aha, I get a reference option. Oh yes, eve, also from Stealth or Blade, play that game if you haven't. Ignore all the sexual stuff. That's good, but the game's fun as hell.
Speaker 1:The story's. The story's biblical, kind of. I only know the story thanks to you, so I can't say shit. The main characters are Adam and Eve, so it's really on the nose. That's supposed to be interesting. Sure, sure, he just says sure.
Speaker 1:Number 10. The Dragonborn from Elder Scrolls, mainly 5. Number 10. The Dragonborn from Elder Scrolls, mainly 5. We can't argue with that.
Speaker 1:I'm surprised you didn't give a Fus-ra-da or something to introduce your character Me just vibing because he's such. No, no, no, you're a separate breed. You're a separate breed. You're a separate breed. You have your own name. No, come on, you know you want to say it. What? What is your character? It's not a regular dragonborn, it's a nigga-born.
Speaker 1:Yes, who started that? It was JJJ, it was, was it? Yeah, because your, your little character has dreads. Oh, yeah, and you're all black. Then you promptly Threw him into a mountain, legendary, get them down a hole. Yeah, alright, we got Jay's number nine.
Speaker 1:I always look forward to it. You never know what you're going to get. Jay is such a mixed bag with his list so you never know. Yeah, heck man. Oh, good Lord, I can't hate on it. Good Lord, waka, waka, waka, waka, waka waka. I hate that. There's a sound to that now. Never heard of that. It's Waka Waka. It's like fucking Fazbear. Now all I hear is Waka Waka whenever I play the game. So I hear Waka, waka Waka. God damn it. Stop eating the pills. Oh God, oh fuck. That's on the internet somewhere.
Speaker 1:Pac-man's a pill popper. Pac-man's a cannibal on secret level. Yeah, yeah, nah, I never seen that one coming. Uh-huh, I seen again why I need to stop. I reference Family Guy for so much shit. When he's like, oh, this is more. You're more depressed than when Ms Pac-Man left.
Speaker 1:Pac-man and Pac-Man's just sitting there in a chair with a cigarette, sad, and the ghosts are there. Hey, what's wrong Pac-Man? Hey, you wanna eat us. And they start doing their shit and they're like, come on, they're gonna eat us, come on, come on, he just sits there. I've seen Demented Cartoon with that one and he just sits there. He's such a classic character, though so classic, they created a fucking tune off of it. Then the fucking ghosts are pissed. Whatever, pac-man, fuck you.
Speaker 1:Hey, let's go over to Q-Berts. Hey, q-berts. Hey, he almost made the list. Let's go over to Q-Berts. He almost made the list and I know that would have threw you off Q-Berts. I said, q-berts, let's go over to Q-Berts.
Speaker 1:Alright, dean, it was the tie. My number nine is Ellie from List of Us. Now I get it. It's the only tie and me and Matt probably share the same reason.
Speaker 1:Ellie has one of the best stories in-game. It's a great story even though it's depressing as all hell and sad. It makes you sad and makes you question humans and just everything. If you play the first one and go right that's why zombie games do well is make you question humanity and go right into the second one, anything that deals with monsters should make you question humanity. I have never.
Speaker 1:You know, when you're playing a cut, one thing Last of Us does good man, have you ever been playing a cutscene like the cutscene is getting you so bad? You're pressing buttons like you're trying to do some shit when fucking stupid Abby is beating Joe with that club? You know how much I'm on my? Yeah, I know what the fuck am I doing. I was in a party with him. Come on, I have that scene memorized because of him. Fuck that gorilla bitch, let's go. I thought. When he said fuck that gorilla bitch, I thought he really wanted to fuck her. No, oh no, no, no, not Abby, oh no, not Abby.
Speaker 1:I haven't seen her full picture, but it looks like they cast a nice little small girl to play Abby in the series. I'm like we need an Amazon to play Abby. Shit, we couldn't get a real Amazon to play Wonder Woman. Yeah, but there's no happiness. There's no ounce of happiness, even after It'd be so easy to find a bodybuilding good-looking, to find a bodybuilding good-looking woman that does bodybuilding, that somehow has the skill to act. It just doesn't make sense for what the genre was supposed to be Abby didn't make sense for the genre it's supposed to be.
Speaker 1:To change your muscle mass that much in an apocalypse yeah, what? Because you see her before and post. Yeah, I suppose you're not eating as much protein. Yeah, pump it up, pump it up. Yeah, what'd you do? She built like a brick shithouse. She's basically been on steroids. I feel bad, steroids, I believe, because they were probably popping pills like crazy. And I feel bad Steroids, I believe, because they were probably popping pills like crazy. And I feel bad because it's so brutal too.
Speaker 1:Ellie's tiny. I think Ellie is hot, don't get me wrong, but Ellie's tiny. And there's a scene where fucking I had to throw. Sorry, the internet ruined that statement. Oh, I figured, yeah, I know, trust me, I know. Well, I figured, yeah, I know, trust me, I know, but ellie is tiny. And there's a c.
Speaker 1:There's a part in part two where you're okay, I'll come out and say it. Porn has ruined that for me. That's, it's true. It's true, but you're, you're in a boss fight with abby and you gotta sneak up behind her and get hits in. It is so bad because if she catches you, she basically just breaks your neck and just eats on him. Bro, okay, I lost, I lost, I get it. How many times did you witness that losing screen just to see a lesbian fantasy in your head? Not much. I didn't like seeing Ellie get just manhandled and get her neck fucking broke.
Speaker 1:To be fair, last of Us does have several cutscenes, because if a bulldozer catches you, it kills you. Technically. It does that, so it does. Batman Arkham yeah, yeah, you just get killed. You just get killed. It's just it's. But the human killing human kills are just so bad, like it's brutal. The only ones I didn't get mad at was when, uh, uh, joel's brother was out there baiting fools that what he did to Manny was just some of the greatest shit I've ever seen. And they try to make you feel bad for Manny. I'm like no, no, no, manny got his, he got no. Manny basically got no-scoped Down a tunnel.
Speaker 1:Yeah, describing it ain't doing it. If you ever had time to play two, you'd understand I haven't't doing it. If you ever had time to play two, you'd understand I haven't played the game. They're great games, but I don't know why I technically haven't finished. Two you just gotta not expect to be happy. You gotta be sad the whole fucking game, cause ain't shit happen. Maybe that's why I have.
Speaker 1:I need to have an Amy Rose pop next to me If I play last of us part, so I can just look over and be like, yeah, you need to have a little cutie next year. I thought that's what Anya was for. That is, that is Anya's behind me. I can't see her because she's behind me on the bed. No, I'm not going to say that what. I'm not putting that out on the internet. Yeah, don't. I can imagine. I almost said all you got to do is put her in your lap. Oh, that's just daddy-daughter time damn near Shit. Hanging out watching something. Lloyd's the dad. You haven't taken over as father yet, I guess I guess. Sure, whatever. Okay, moving on, it was started about. That was plenty of Ellie. That was the last of us talking. Well, that's right, it goes to me because, de facto, we're munching through this on plenty of good. So I'm trying to.
Speaker 1:It's kind of odd that I'm making this number Bowser. Hey, jace, it's not good for that. I should hate him. I really should hate him. He's a part of Jay's childhood trauma. I really should.
Speaker 1:Before I even knew who the character really was, he was associated with my last name, a Bowser. Because of how you pronounced my last name, bowser Just replaced the H with a B, bowser. But then I learned who he was. It's a fire fire breathing, fucking dragon tortoise. And the funny thing about Bowser he just claimed a victory on death battle. He beat Eggman in death battle, bowser, he's a fucking fire breathing, because Eggman had the tech but he could not put him down. He couldn't put Bowser down. No, send Metal Sonic after him. Then it's a different story. I give Eggman a lot of credit, but he gets down. No, send Metal Sonic after him. That's a different story. I give Eggman a lot of credit, but he gets beat by Tails. So much tech-wise, except for in Sonic Adventure 2, where they're kind of equal and they're basically mirrors of each other.
Speaker 1:That's the one thing that game did. It allowed you to play both sides of the stories. You got to play a shadow story. You got to play Ruge's story. You got to play on what the fuck is his name? Omega 13. Yeah, the robot that I hope to see at some point. We might even get it, I don't know, since we got metal Sonic coming, tails got his own story. Tails got his own story. Knuckles got his own story where he's hunting for the fucking Master Emerald. Since somebody decided to break it, as yourself was playing Duncan man at arms, but that is, that's kind of cool. That's as far as I'll go with that one.
Speaker 1:Allison Brie as Evil Wynn? I don't know, I don't have a picture for that in my brain Community. That was eight for me, so you're on seven. Eight, you're on seven already. I'm on eight. Wait, because I just said wait, oh okay, I'm on it. Wait, what am I? Yeah, eight, you're on your eight. Yeah, is it? Yeah, oh well, that's right I started.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it is scorpion from mortal combat. That's kind of the basic answer for mortal, but scorpion's my favorite. Scorpion is always just. I was debating who is my favorite as much as I love reptile. It's like favorite Scorpion is always just. I was debating who is my favorite as much as I love Reptile. It's Scorpion. Which version of Reptile, though? You want? Humanoid Reptile, the humanoid version where he can switch into being a Reptile. I like that Reptile. Okay, they should have did that in the movie instead of just making him a Reptile. I like the Reptile that's in one. Honestly, mortal Kombat 1, I like that reptile. You know when a game gets a lot of flack? No, but I like that reptile.
Speaker 1:Scorpion is actually Scorpion might be in a bunch of people's top 10. Scorpion's iconic to everyone. Then you debate, though, who's more iconic, scorpion or Sub-Zero, and it's pretty much equal. You got fans on each side, scorpion or fire, and I'm more fired and ice, so I always tend to lean Scorpion.
Speaker 1:He takes his head off. He's basically Ghost Rider. He's got a flaming skull for a head. Yeah, that would make him a favorite of yours. Oh god, no, why did I just put that on my head? You know how Marvel has a lot of crossovers like Marvel Capcom. Yeah, scorpion does not need to be a fucking. Has a lot of crossovers like Marvel Capcom. Yeah, scorpion does not need to be a fucking ghost writer. You know he technically already is a ghost of vengeance, vengeance, vengeance. I don't know if that's what they were going for when they made him or what. Like this moveset. Liked his character story. Yeah, scorpion, I like Scorpion. Everybody likes his story so much he got three different movies of it. Yep, in fact he got an animated movie along Mm-hmm. So Zidane Tribal, yeah.
Speaker 1:Final Fantasy 9, oh oh, I'm not as good with Final Fantasy, so that was, ah. Mr Monkey man yeah, the one who always throws me off. Everything about him is like completely human, except for the damn tail. So he's a Saiyan who doesn't go. Super Saiyan, oh my, did you say trance, trance? I heard it too. I was like what? I wouldn't put it past Final Fantasy, but I don't remember that. What? Oh boy, I thought I heard it for a second. He said Trance. I don't think Matt said Trance, I think. So that is not a Matt thing. No, oh God, it's basically Super Saiyan, it's a giant. Yeah, that was a thing. Okay.
Speaker 1:The sad thing is, when I think about it, having only dabbled and not played many of the games, the only characters that could have been in contention in Final Fantasy for me would have been Valentine from 7 and Lightning. What's Lightning 13? And I love Lightning too, other than that, oh, never mind Tifa, but that's just. That's a different fucking story. That's an entirely different podcast topic. Yeah, that's Tifa. Hey, how you doing that's fucking Tifa man.
Speaker 1:Ugh, he's a lovable rogue going after the princess the entire time and he's an alien and doesn't know that until halfway through the game. Funny thing though, I never played the full game. One positive I always give Final Fantasy 7 and people have told me if I played the remakes I might really love them if I played them. So they're on my list To maybe try. But everyone tells us Because I know him. But everyone's like Daniel just loves Sephiroth. He's just a badass, giga-chad bad guy that does what he wants.
Speaker 1:They fully developed his story this time around Seven, lucky number seven. I kind of feel odd putting him at this. But Link as a whole, hey, doesn't matter which one. Sure you don't mean Zelda. You beat me to it, you bastard. I was gonna say Zelda. My love of Robin Williams will not allow me to do so. That's me the obvious. Joe, I've seen a lot of fucking internet picks this month. If you wanted to see Zelda, I would have said Zelda. I've seen all of them Because she is in her own character. You want to know who's a sidestep from this one? The Twilight Princess herself. She's a favorite. Which one? I'm trying to think which.
Speaker 1:I played one. I played one Legend of Zelda game pretty much a lot. I played when I was a kid Majora's Mask. I played that one quite a bit. I played that one quite a bit. That one was pretty good. I believe we're on year 17. Midna there.
Speaker 1:If you want me to go into specific characters from that series, I like Link as a whole. Wolf Link, twilight Princess might have been my favorite. God. I don't remember my favorite On Max. I don't remember my favorite On Max. I don't remember my favorite. I can't find her. Jay would probably be able to help me. But there is one character. It actually reinvigorated my love for the games because it the only actual love I got out of the games was watching JJ play Majora's Mask in what was the one where he goes back in time Ocarina of Time.
Speaker 1:Ocarina of Time, ocarina of Time. I know how the fuck I say it. Well, I know a lot of random shit. I just had a mind blank. Oh, there it is, there it is. I was like who did I really just hear? Oh, from Legend of Zelda, what's up here here? Just cause, just cause, here, just cause, just cause.
Speaker 1:Jay's gonna be like, of course I have a thing for her, bro. So you're like, of course you do. It's the amazons. I mean like, yeah, you know what, though? You know what, though? I could totally see you doing exactly what you have to do as Link to get into Earth City. Oh, cross-dress, yep, you want what? I would give you away, though, my fucking bulge. No, your beard. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, beard, the other one. You gotta have you seen the fucking pants they wear. If your fucking bulge shows through those, it's like. It's like, bro, get help. You're. Either you either have a heart on and it's going straight up or you have something bigger than I never want to see. Oh, good lord. Oh, it's seven for me. You just did seven, right?
Speaker 1:Yes, king from Tekken. That is my main from Tekken. I always play King. Just a simple, heartwarming story. A luchador is trying to get money for his orphanage. Original King died. Actually, the King you play as now is one of the orphans. He took up the mantle, but I don't think Jay's surprised. King will be on there somewhere.
Speaker 1:Lucha libre, I'm kind of sad that you did that at 7, because my next one I want to say is going to be after him. King, I like Yoshimitsu, but he ruined by one short fucker. I can't let him get any of the fucking joke characters. Yoshimitsu always got cool designs and shit, but it's such a shame. I'm like bro, it's because Mitsu Yoshi is a different fucking Yoshi Yoshi.
Speaker 1:Not that Yoshi, oh, fuck yeah, not that Yoshi Dean, you already went to Mario you were thinking about, I was thinking about the end credits of Mario. You went for it. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. Still talking, good as that.
Speaker 1:Oh well, seven, I'm not going to stop your rants mid-chats. Well, half of our rants are senseless bullshit. Even Jay will. That was completely senseless bullshit between us. I was just making Yoshi sounds for no reason. I had ones at that. What am I eating? Oh no, your stomach hasn't spoken up yet. Oh, number seven, scarefox Did that game completely.
Speaker 1:All I'm seeing is a fox. All I'm seeing is a frog yelling at me. You're not shooting at the right target, star. No, I'm not at all wrong, fox, fox, we've got an emergency. I'm shooting. I don't want you to talk to me right now. You're distracting me like oh, you know the character from that game series that has ruined for me thanks to the internet.
Speaker 1:Crystal, oh boy, goddamn, rue 34. That's a lot of things. And uh, uh, what Zone From? Uh? Battlegrounds or not Battlegrounds? What the hell was that one site where you could play games? Newgrounds, newgrounds. Yep. Completely ruined Crystal for me, completely. Six, completely.
Speaker 1:Jin Kazama oh, I see what you meant there. Jin's up there. Jin's like two or three. I completely enjoyed his redemption arc in his last fucking game, double Jin's, like two or three. I completely enjoyed his redemption arc in his last fucking game, double Jin's my shit. I have a second in my honorable mentions. Him and his father duped it out to the end in this one and I enjoyed it. And then Hayachi was a fucking DLC character With DLC story. I enjoyed every bit of it because I actually had a.
Speaker 1:What the hell is it called when you have memory loss? Amnesia, amnesia, thank you. I don't know why I'm having a lapse. I have no dictionary up there, full thesaurus. I can't think of words, no words.
Speaker 1:Tekken the funny best thing about Tekken, especially the older games, when you're playing through the arcade and you get these random fights Kuma I fucking love Kuma. Bear, no, get the raptor or the kangaroo involved or the dude that's made of wood. There's a dude made of wood that's as bad as Mocap. What the fuck is this? He has a name, though. He has a fucking name. I'm gonna type in wood dude from Tekken and see what I get.
Speaker 1:It has something to do with Jin, because it was one of Jin's practice dummies that came to life Mokujin Mokujin, mokujinokujin, mokujin Mokujin. That motherfucker beat your ass. That motherfucker beat your ass too, bro. I got beat by a fucker made of wood Because he had every fucking style in the game. What the fuck is this now? A panda? Fuck. That game was so random. Aw, don't knock panda.
Speaker 1:Yoshi Mitsu is my honorable mention. Jj, fuck you. Yeah, that JJ would do that fucking sword stance where he just sits there and stops and hops on it until you would get closer to him and then he would do the fucking spin or the leg kick and then he'd air toss your ass. Don't get me started. I know how he plays.
Speaker 1:Pokemon Stadium Flew up in the sky Half a fucking bitch. I was kicking his ass. He put this stupid belt on the line. I was kicking his ass too. I'm a champ out there and I was one shot in all his shit. Then he called his Zubat out and kept flying up in the sky. Bro, you a bitch, bro, you are a bitch. I was getting legit pissed at him the whole time. He's like I don't care, you're winning cheap, bro, you care? Yeah, I don't care, I'm winning dude.
Speaker 1:At least it wasn't a new, at least it wasn't a new gen Snorlax that knew bounce. Bounce is like fly. I'd have quit. I'd probably threw his controller and left if I'd seen a Snorlax. I'm done. That's literally it In the new animations. It tops up on its feet and then it just bounces.
Speaker 1:The only counter, the only counter I could have, and it wasn't in the game yet, it's too new the only counter I could have had not really a counter, but the troll was, if I had a Miltank, roll out, roll out, roll out. You want to play bullshit? We're going to play bullshit, you fucker. Secondly, it'll take one to one too, because it's got a higher speed stat. Roll out, roll out, roll out. You could have used Dig to get out of it. Yeah, true, dig or Fly too, because it wasn't too. It depends on when Dig is used. Someone asked me if he has to have a higher speed stat to use Dig first. Someone asked me one time, technically it needs to go second.
Speaker 1:Yeah, actually, someone asked me one time random, fucking a random Pokemon question. I was like you know what? It actually was obvious. He asked hey, dean, if you know a Pokemon, I know a decent amount. He's like well, if Pokemon existed, what would be Wisconsin's Pokemon? I'm like Miltank.
Speaker 1:Miltank Because it's a cow, it's a cat or a fucking deer. Oh, good lord, that changes its skin with the seasons. Yeah, yeah, miltank, miltank or anything snow-related Snow-rent. No, no, no, no, no, it's Obama snow. Oh, my Vanilla. No, we do not get a fucking ice cream cone for a Pokemon. That shit had me like what the fuck is that? It's an ice cream cone and it just doubles up. It goes from a one scoop to a double scoop to a triple scoop. They give the Digimon evolution shit. Look at Vanilla. Believe it or not, that's still a straight evolution. That's not Digimon Extra scoop.
Speaker 1:Oh, we're going to put pants on this guy and then call him an ultimate Nothing beat. Remember Sock and Throw. They didn't even try anymore. Oh, we're going to put pants on this guy and then call him an ultimate Nothing beat. Remember sock and throw. They didn't even try anymore. They just made judo, guys, don't lie, you'd like that. They brought judo in.
Speaker 1:It was funny, but okay, well. Well, you just went on a five-minute tangent on Pokemon. It's not hard to do. Imagine if JJ was here, saw control. One, two, three, four, five, six. I can't really tell you guys to speed it up because he's next Me. You want me? Yeah, what six? Yes, oh, how do I have that? One, two, three, four, five. I have six left and we're on six. Yes, oh, how do I have that? One, two, three, four, five. I have six left and we're on six. Yeah, oh, I had one extra. Whoops, six.
Speaker 1:Jill Valentine, resident Evil. Well, everyone should know Jill would have been on mine somewhere. I love Jill, second favorite, probably favorite female character for Resident Evil, second favorite overall. So Jill, I, just I, jill.
Speaker 1:Jill's got good games and the obvious, jill's hot. Jill is hot. I can speed it up if I have to Shit. You're saying that like you're mad, I can't talk to shit. I'm not that mad. That's how I can speed fast. Gotta kind of speedrun, this shit, which is easily doable. Speedrun on the Sonic podcast. Oh God, gotta go fast. What do you want? Gotta go fast. Well, some of these are getting to my heavy hitter. Six Riku, Asters, six Riku, as in Kingdom Hearts, riku. I told you I was going with the other one. It just kind of makes me happy, it's not?
Speaker 1:I thought his story was better than Sora's. Ooh hot, take, good job, it covers the dark side Pretty quickly, willing to become a copy of Ansem to do what he needed to do All that shit. He said his. Now I'm putting mine. And it's a triple threat because it's basically the same fucking person.
Speaker 1:Oh god, roxas, sora and Ventus, they're all the same person technically. Series Kingdom Hearts. Oh, kingdom Hearts. It literally is the main character of Kingdom Hearts. Oh yeah, sora. Okay, I should have picked up on Sora. Roxas the nobody, sora the heartless. Sora is the normal, he is sort of normal. He ended up being the Heartless at some point, though because of Ventus. That's how you got the nobody. Ventus is technically the original body. That's how fucked up Kingdom Hearts storyline is, and the only reason we know who Ventus is is because of PSP game that not a lot of people, except for hardcore fans, played. That's the biggest issue with Kingdom Hearts. You have fucking Game Boy Advance games that are canon. The card game is canon story.
Speaker 1:One of the biggest things for Kingdom Hearts that I know because I watch Game Ranks, I do a lot of gaming top 10s and stuff. They had a Kingdom Hearts boss fight. Know, because I watch Game Ranks, I do a lot of gaming top tens and stuff. They had a game Kingdom Hearts boss fight was on top ten hardest boss fights.
Speaker 1:There was apparently a fight where you fight Sephiroth in one of those. It's bullshit, apparently. It's bullshit. You can't even win that bitch. Almost Max fucking level with max abilities. You still lose. Was he like one shot you? And shit, yeah, he has abilities where he one shot. It's like Souls, fucking timing. Oh, to dodge his shit. Yes, you're like no, that shit's hard. That's bullshit. Kingdom Hearts is one of those fucking RPGs that you would get into just because of the action, battling. It's not, and in the end you don't even kill him. Cloud comes in and kills him. It's like story wise it's still kind of fitting. No, see, no, I liked facing Sephiroth in the Coliseum more than I liked facing him off as a side quest, because a side quest, because a side quest battle, is when he fucking kills your ass Versus the Colosseum where you earn the trophy or a Hercules storyline in Kingdom Hearts 1.
Speaker 1:That was number six. No, technically you just did your five. That was my five. Yeah, your Sora was your five. Well, my five. I figured I'd put them next to each other.
Speaker 1:It's my favorite male from Resident Evil, leon Kennedy, who just was done so dirty. I date with the president's daughter. Thank you, disney. Thank you, disney, so dirty. I date with the president's daughter. Thank you, disney. You mentioned that last time. Thank you, thank you, disney.
Speaker 1:Baby Eagle, leon's cold man, ashley keeps trying to give him the hits that she's into him and he's just like yeah, that's her name, ashley Graham, shut up first off. He's such a piece of shit, so I could, maybe I could need straws for that one too. Oh, you bitch. Leon's so damn snarky. It's great She'll say some shit. Like Leon, I can see if my dad will put you on my Personal detail permanently. Not interested, sorry, that's cause he's Leon's too hung up on Ada Wong. That's why he's too Ada. I'd be hung up on Ada Wong. That's why he's too Ada. I'd be hung up on her too. Ada, ada, I love you, ada, but you don't want nothing to do with me or Leon. I hope he comes back in the next Resident Evil game, please.
Speaker 1:They're going to make him old. I hear too, it's like old, grizzled Leon, oh, boyled Leon going to his death. No, they can't kill Leon. You can't kill Leon. The fangirls are the next character. They're gonna kill him, not age him, but middle age him, because Leon's like how old is Leon in 6? Probably 30s max. Leon's not that old, so at most he's gonna be in his fucking 50s. Then if they age him, give him some gray, grizzle him up. Apparently it's going to be late 40s. He's going to look like Tommy. Which Tommy are we talking about here? Last of us? Last of us too, tommy, almost really.
Speaker 1:But back on the Ada. One thing about the Ada that's Ada's fault. Ada played him games. Ada ain't right for playing him games with them. She's always been fucking with them. Bye handsome, see you later, ada. Why you do that to Leon, bro? Why you do that to Leon? You just get him along and shit damn, it's the Asian Americans.
Speaker 1:As much as I love Ada, it's like as Ada was in my top anti-heroes list. I love Ada. It's like as Ada was in my top anti-heroes list. I love Ada, but it's like you gotta come on, man, leon does some ridiculous-ass shit too that no human should be doing. But nothing beats Resident Evil 5, and we got Chris punching that boulder Bro. Where the fuck'd that come from? My god, resident Evil's done some shit, man. Yeah, leon, boom, it's done some shit. Oh, stunt, some shit.
Speaker 1:We're at four for Matt, right Five. That's how much we're losing track. I'm not really. I forget who started. We always lose track of numbers when I start. I'm just saying that now that makes sense. Now, okay, I'll bring it up, because having me talk a bunch of shit and then you, you know, Can I chime in, so it's off tangent to off tangent to Matt. It does not help us. I'll bring her up because Dean Won't defunct. He brought her up. Yeah, he brought her up, but he won't put her on the list. Her final fantasy. She's there. She's probably in my honorable mentions if I look.
Speaker 1:The developers for Square Enix are under a little shit right now for Tifa in the last game. So we're, because their HR department said to reduce her bust. If I was, I would fight that to the end. No, we're going to fight. Compare Polygon Tifa to Reboot Tifa.
Speaker 1:There's something missing. I know it's like bro, how drastically Stellar Blade stood their ground. They wanted them to censor physics or jiggles and they didn't do it, stood their ground. Everyone appreciates jiggle physics, even Disney. Oh, I forgot, just looking to laugh out of Jay.
Speaker 1:They just released the Christmas update for and she gets a Santa hat. Santa and Santa, no Free. Oh Jesus, because'm like. Oh Jesus, because they got Christmas trees all over Zion. I'm like, oh, stella Blades, stop treating me so good. So that was your five, I'm on four.
Speaker 1:He just punches things. I have to figure this out here. Let's go with it. Let's pull my graph. Pull my graph. Ain't that infamous, infamous? Okay, good games I ain't played them in fucking eons, but good games. 1 and 2? Amazing. The technical reboot Second son, first son.
Speaker 1:I hate it. I do hate it, but it felt so fucking off not playing as Cole, and the fact that now more people can actually take in more abilities after the second game explains how he had to do it. He almost died from doing it. That's another series that just died. They did that one and it never touched again. You sad about that.
Speaker 1:That was the premier game for the PS4. Introducing the new controller mechanics and how nice the games looked and shit. Graphic-wise. It was a great game. It just died. That was supposed to have a sequel yeah, then it just stopped. They just stopped making them.
Speaker 1:Killzone was always a staple of PlayStation. We had a small, small DLC, lightzone or some shit for the game instead of being an actual game. That was always another one of them. Good, it's pretty solid series. I just randomly, we're not gonna make anymore. Awesome fucking main character, though, especially. Uh, have you ever played the DLC for 2 when it was technically it's own game, where it went to Louisiana and you had the vampires? Yeah, I believe. So good stuff. I know you would have loved it. I played them all. Those were good games. Okay, here we go. Good stuff, definitely. I know you would have loved it. I played them all. Those were good games. I played them all. Those were good games. Okay, here we go.
Speaker 1:My four, I believe my favorite British bombshell Lara Croft, polygon or non-polygon, both, even though my favorite design of Lara Croft is the newer games, the newest games. What would you call that trilogy? Because it is a trilogy. Now, yeah, tomb Raider, it's going to become a trilogy because they didn't release the third one. No, they did. It was Tomb Raider. It was like Shadow of the Tomb Raider, like Legend of the Tomb Raider and then Shadow of the Tomb Raider. They did three. Did I play that shit out? I don't think I think I did. Yeah, they did three of them. I think I did Shadow before I did the Legend one. Yeah, because Legend's the middle one. But yeah, they did those. I loved them. They were kind of uncharted knock-offs in a way, but they were still great. They were still great.
Speaker 1:It's the first fucking Lara Croft game where I had to craft my own ship. Lara Croft, she's snarky, she's fun. I've always gotta say she's hot. And the British accent just Did the first one feel more like a survival game than anything else to you. Kinda, kinda, kinda, kinda. And then, too, they added more puzzles. Yeah Well, they gotta have some puzzles. That's the one that took place in Amazon.
Speaker 1:And the cool thing is the Netflix show takes place after I'm chilly. The Netflix show is part of that timeline. So the Netflix show takes place after Shadow of the Tomb Raider. So that was cool. Watching that, I'm surprised I have not watched that. We'll get a season two Shadow of the Tomb Raider. So that was cool. Watching that, I'm surprised I have not watched that. We'll get a season two, so I'm happy.
Speaker 1:Atwell, hayley, atwell, I think those are voice. Those are voice Cool. Iggy Carter. Yes, laura, laura Croft, what's up? Matt, nathan Drake hey, that's kind of a good follow-up. That's a good follow up. That's a good follow up.
Speaker 1:I was going to say the original, but Lara Croft came first. They're so similar I forget. Lara Croft has been all around a lot longer than Drake has. Lara was in Playstation 1 and Drake didn't come out to Playstation 2. Yeah, I might have been 3.
Speaker 1:Drake's Fortune, I think, was 3. I don't remember if that was on 2, I think it was. I might have been three Because Drake's Fortune, I think, was three. I don't remember if that was on two. I think that was three. Well, drake's Drake's Fortune is the first game. Drake's Fortune Among Thieves, drake's Deception and then Thieves End, thieves End. I was going to say four. Drake's Fortune, I remember playing it on. I don't remember Deception being on 3. I sadly only played them after they got the remastered release, even though my pirate bias is strong. But 4 was my favorite.
Speaker 1:Thief's End. Isn't that why you had such a big issue with the movie? It was kind of pirates. Yeah, it was pirate treasure, and then they did the spino of Pirates it was Pirate Treasure and then they did the spinoff of Chloe. That was also great. Shorter game, but that was also great. I should do more of that series.
Speaker 1:Don't retire it, Naughty Dog, don't. What? Are we on to? Mine Three Since Dean decided to grab hold of Nathan Drake Spiral.
Speaker 1:Is there any one of us who did not like a Spiral game? Didn't like I, didn't play them all, I only played one and two. There's only one Spiral game I didn't like and that's when he became a fucking kids toy Skylanders. Hmm, I did not get behind that whole idea of needing to collect a toy for the game. Oh, even though I did like the uh cards for, like the Wii and stuff.
Speaker 1:Yeah, mhm, what that was number three, spyro the Dragon. It was a good classic choice. You can tell I'm a fucking Sony fan. It's a classic choice that you cannot knock. Are you surprised I didn't say Crash Bandicoot, that Naughty Dog would have came back full circle moment, naughty Dog. Well, we got my three now. Oh Christ, I like how you lose track of whose turn it is when it's literally just a circle. He just got done talking. We didn't go off tangent this time either. It's funny when you lose track of who speaks next Organization. Well, I don't even have to tie in when you got that. Number three is Chun-Li. I don't got to think about Chun-Li. You don't have to talk about Chun-Li, because you'd be getting into her legs and thighs. I don't need to elaborate, I don't need to.
Speaker 1:How did you like Street Fighter 6, chun-li, older, mature Chun-Li? No, you liked her in that milfy state, didn't you? I did? No, yep, I did, of course I did. It's his fault.
Speaker 1:Now what? I'm being good boy. You don't know what a good boy is. I don't get head pats. I was getting head pats in the car, yeah, and you yelled at me for doing it. Oh, what am I gonna say? I like Chin Lee, good character. Oh shit, amy Lee pops in front. Amy Rose pops in front of me. That's how I'm gone. I'm gone, man. No, chun-li's still on the brain. You switched with Amy. You switched with Chun-Li. I stopped myself.
Speaker 1:I almost said Chun-Li's on the head, but you didn't want me to say that because then it's over. You said it to yourself. I know I did, but my brain went. This is why you don't need a fluffer. No, why is that that doesn't need to come up every, especially when we're all pretty much running on empty and you gotta say and then fluffer comes up, good lord. They said we're running on MD, we are. I'm actually really not. I'm just trying to be like everybody else. My energy tank is ridiculous for no reason and we all know this. I'm sorry, matt, that's a dad joke that couldn't get by. Actually, I said Chun-Li, I'm not a vampire. Vincent Valentine, a vampire, but not a vampire. I still don't get that story.
Speaker 1:I think Matt's love for us is overflowing right now. No, it's not love. We're making his eyes redder than red right now. We're making him more. Whatever this is, it's not love.
Speaker 1:Oh God, never doing a double feature again. Does that do? What's that do for me? Look at her. One pull and you're cute. I tried. What's that do? Number two oh, fuck. Number two. Sonic and Tails. They have one without the other, literally, because the first fucking video game I remember playing as a kid is Sonic 2. Oh, good, good, good On the Sega.
Speaker 1:On the Sega, on the Sega alright Number. Oh, oh, on the Sega. On the Sega, on the Sega, all right Number. Oh, geez, here we come. This will probably never, ever change.
Speaker 1:Number two, sir Daniel Fortescue, from Medieval, you know, and props for that one. You'd still hate me playing that game. You didn't do it right. You're not doing it right. My dad could still do it, that's just.
Speaker 1:That's the lovable, gullible hero man. Sir Dan Matt, not even going to give us his number two. He's preparing, he's fantasizing about I'm done, I'm dead, I'm going to lay down. He's fantasizing about killing us, fantasizing we're going gonna get in trouble. I can kill you any time I want. We're gonna be in trouble next time. It's usually gonna be during D&D. He's gonna remember this. That's not cool because he already lays me flat most of the time. Hydro pump, that's how you beat a turtle On their back. Laying them flat, flat On their back, playing them flat, flat on their back. We're waiting on your number two. We're getting there.
Speaker 1:Oh, jokes, captain John Price, call of Duty, modern Warfare. Should I have said Dost? Dost is another one that's got fucking memes Doing whatever the fuck he wants to get to Makarov? This was one of the greatest Call of Duty storylines right there. Uh-huh, it's so good they're redoing it. Yeah, they couldn't top it, it's alright, let's tell it again.
Speaker 1:Uh, number one. There we go? Commander Shepard, I knew that was coming Appropriate. Is that one of your just ass pulls or is that legitimate, probably your favorite? Probably legitimate, okay, because, well, here's the thing when it comes to Dragon Age, there isn't just one character. Now, they tried doing this to me in Andromeda, but everybody fucking hated Andromeda. I liked Andromeda. Yeah, everybody hated it. Everyone hated it. God, this does not fit saying it to you. I liked the Riders, the Riders, that was their name. The Riders, riders, the Riders, that was their name. The Riders, riders, riders, oh God, yeah, okay, I get what you're like. What the fuck? Oh, okay, the Twins, I liked them.
Speaker 1:Now, the first three Mass Effects you either chose male or female. You got male ship or female ship. Of course, most of the time I went female Shep because I'm one of those people that would rather be staring at a woman's ass when I'm playing a game. Very true, very true. But as far as character goes, that's one of my favorite Female Shep at that. I should probably specify that. Want to specify? Yep, yeah, no, nah, yeah, I really like Male Shep. What? Why do you like Male Shep? Male Shep, fuck you, male Shep, female Shep, okay, this is my favorite store on the Citadel.
Speaker 1:Oh boy, well, okay, number one. Why am I even looking at my phone? Why do you think I closed my book? I know my one and two. It's a tie because it's pretty much the same person.
Speaker 1:It's Solid Snake and Big Boss. That is my favorite. Hold on, hold on Clone. The Solid Snake is a clone of Big Boss, so they're pretty much which Big Boss? Actual Big Boss, not Venom Snake. Venom Snake's the one in. I wasn't tossing him enough for a loot.
Speaker 1:Snake here. Big Boss Naked here. Big boss, naked snake. Big boss, that's the boss. The boss You're talking about. The boss. Okay, there is a distinction between the two.
Speaker 1:Huh, my favorite Metal Gear game always flops between three and four. It's also the most that get me in the oh, metal Gear is one of the you can fuck off with three and I know where you're going to go just to piss me off. Oh, the end. Yes, you know you can turn your console. Leave your console on and you'll die of old age. It doesn't fit to that. No, you can't even hide.
Speaker 1:That's the glitch I got. You've witnessed this. It's worse that one. Or Jason, jason, because that I still remember playing that. How annoyed would you be if you heard your name over and over and you couldn't do anything about it. That was. We played that in the kids room. Now I don't remember if I brang my console over or I brang the game over, just make sure it wasn't shitting you. I get this fucking glitch every time I play. I don't know what it is, I remember now. But Snake the story of Naked Snake and Solid Snake and Big Boss are my favorite character story in all of games. I will probably never be topped. I just wish they would do more with it.
Speaker 1:But that series is pretty much dead, even though Kojima himself said his next game after Death Stranding 2, he wants to get back into the stealth genre. I'm like what you mean? What you mean? Well, come on, how many people actually played Metal Gear Solid as stealth? I tried, I did, you tried the first time out and it pisses you off. And then you're like fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. I've played many playthroughs of each one. I'm the one of the few people that would love a sequel of Revengeance. I love playing as Ryan, just Sam, yeah, I just lowkey.
Speaker 1:Did the fucking episode 3 Lightsaber fight? Was it in the hallway? Oh god. But yes, again, I could do a whole podcast Just rambling for hours about Metal Gear. That's kind of sad. We both had a Star Wars reference. I could do a whole podcast just rambling for hours about Metal Gear. That's kind of sad. We both had a Star Wars reference.
Speaker 1:I asked about a hallway and Matt's so dead. He didn't say a damn word. He's planning his next move, like killing us. Well, he gets his number one now. So Number one, matt. You're taking this off, hello, hello, you're taking this off, hello, hello. Did he fall asleep in his chair while also playing on his phone? That'd be a blooper for the podcast. I saw something that might piss Dean off.
Speaker 1:Okay, no, we didn't lose Sonic. Nope, I'll leave that one alone. Oh no, I don't know if it's real, so I don't want to say anything yet about that one. We lost Sonic. How did we lose Sonic? We already lost Knuckles. He just thinks it's football, which it could be. I have Sonic and we're not losing him. They didn't play tonight. It's a Saturday. We can't lose a player. They could get hurt training or something. We lost Sonic, the entire Detroit Tigers team and Detroit Lions team in a plane crash. Oh god, today's travel day. Don't speak that into existence. Detroit Lions team McTown in a plane crash. Oh God, today's travel day. Don't speak that into existence, because then we get the sound of music. But it's the Detroit Lions, oh God. And then we'd have to figure out who the fuck cursed them again.
Speaker 1:No, this was leaked footage of Jurassic World Rebirth and I don't know how to feel about that. I don't know how they're working. That's what makes me mad. Uh-huh, oh boy. Oh, because who's in it? Scarlett Johansson. Yeah, did she get naked? Why would that make him mad? I had to ask Did she get naked? Yeah, why would that make me mad? Because we're still in here with you, oh boy.
Speaker 1:No, my number one is Orin from Final Fantasy X. Yes, yes, yes, yes, love his story. I've brought it up before 20-something episodes ago. He's stupid. We apologize if we already did a top 10 video game characters. We gotta keep better track of our top 10s than we've done. If I re-uploaded the other episodes, it would help us keep track, because it actually tells us when we do top 10s. Alright, everybody, that's our first double feature and probably our last, because it's been a long time. So because this was a long time. So have a good night, stay safe, considering our night started 12 hours ago. Yeah, so have a good night, stay safe and Merry Christmas if you celebrate, or Happy Holidays. How about Nosferatu? Nosferatu will be our next episode next week. Goodnight folks, goodnight.
