Knightfalls Vale

He-Man Vs The Box Office

Dreadnaut, Torin, Vallion Season 3 Episode 8

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email us at knighfallsvale@gmail.com

A movie can be genuinely fun, packed with craft, and still get labeled a flop. We start with Masters of the Universe and why the new live action He-Man actually worked for us: the tone stays colorful, the action hits, and it feels like a team that understands the cartoon made real choices instead of winking at the source. Then we slam into the part nobody wants to talk about, the budget and box office reality that can erase sequel plans overnight. 

From there, we stack Masters of the Universe against Scary Movie 6 and talk why spoof comedies keep finding a way to win with audiences even when critics roll their eyes. We break down the “double the budget” rule, how marketing changes the math, and why streaming success sometimes becomes the only lifeline. And yes, we go down the rabbit hole of what comes next when studios chase IP: Mattel’s movie slate gets weird fast, with everything from Hot Wheels and Barney to Bob the Builder and even Uno. 

We close by unloading a smorgasbord of video game news and fandom talk: God of War choices, hype and skepticism around big announcements, Resident Evil remake rumors, and a long Vox Machina and Critical Role detour that turns into pure character and lore debate. If you care about He-Man, box office drama, gaming headlines, and the state of modern fandom, you’ll feel right at home. Subscribe, share the show with a friend, and leave a review, then tell us what you think: should fans “vote with wallets” more often, or is the market already decided?

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SPEAKER_06

Hello, all. Welcome to the Night Fallsville podcast.

SPEAKER_03

Masters of the Universe edition.

SPEAKER_01

And scary movie. I was gonna say, why do you open it up like you're the fucking creeper from

Creepy Intro And He-Man Hype

SPEAKER_01

the crypt?

SPEAKER_04

They have the power. Yeah, there are two ways you could go. But not no, you gotta use that voice and then say it as what's your favorite scary movie. What's your favorite scary movie? No, you wait, you change the tone. You commit it.

SPEAKER_03

I have the power.

SPEAKER_04

Oh. You say it in that voice and then sound like. Okay, okay. Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_03

God, saying okay, fuck. Wow. Fucked him up on the intro. I know. He fucked me up, but he fucked himself, technically. That's easy to do, but doesn't have the power.

SPEAKER_04

Hey, I didn't pull I didn't pull the sword out of Tarok. Oh god. That's an actual comic, by the way. I know. Oh my god. I hate a few of them. I hate HR. More than I already did.

SPEAKER_05

That was a little too surreal.

SPEAKER_06

That's what I literally told that's literally what I told my mom.

SPEAKER_04

It's like that felt a little too real. That was a whole company based on HR. Like what the fuck?

SPEAKER_05

That entire room, that thing that he was in, he was in HR.

SPEAKER_04

Human but HR of what?

SPEAKER_05

That's the problem. It was just HR.

SPEAKER_04

That's a scary universe.

SPEAKER_05

HR of America. Well, in Oklahoma.

SPEAKER_06

To put it simply, E-Man was a very good, fun movie that we'll probably never get nothing of because it's just not doing money good money-wise. Which is sad. That's disheartening.

SPEAKER_04

Let's see what

Why Masters Of The Universe Works

SPEAKER_04

the official number is.

SPEAKER_05

Like I said on our Facebook for both scary movie and this one, just go see it.

SPEAKER_02

I recommend it.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, both something. Both I'd recommend it. If I think it was shit, I'd tell you not to go see it. But I recommend it.

SPEAKER_05

That needs to be done. Is you need to go see good movies. You need you need to actually fund them so we get more good stuff from people who actually love what they're doing.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, wait, He-Man didn't get released internationally?

unknown

No.

SPEAKER_04

It should have. I mean, international. I got I got a grand total of zero. International takes a bit to rent time to register. I know that. I don't think it got fucking. I mean, let's I'll see if Scary Movie 6 has anything for it. Probably not. The Wayne's brothers? Yeah. Surprised me. There's more in there than you think all the time. I didn't pay for the Skittles, so it always tastes good.

SPEAKER_02

Came with the popcorn bucket.

SPEAKER_04

Well, these are also my favorite. I don't like the bread Skittles are mad, but I don't compare to my Saui Skittles. Sour skills are best. My tongue's already like, bro, again.

SPEAKER_03

You know, why the fuck are you looking at them things again?

SPEAKER_02

Context. Yeah, yeah, nothing for since we supposedly went and seen the gayest movie.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. I mean, for God's sake, Skelipour was all chiseled. It's too and talking about people's thighs. Yep, yep, yep. About long.

SPEAKER_05

You have a long sword between your thighs.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa.

SPEAKER_05

Dean felt called out there.

SPEAKER_06

Hey, hey. Oh, you know what? One of my favorite. You know what I like though? He may not have had the exact that exact, like, over-obnoxious voice, but he was still silly.

SPEAKER_04

That was the important thing. He was still delivered. I would have appreciated a little bit more Zany. A little bit more. He might get it when he comes back. That dream sequence, though, him in the gym and in his suit was all that one. I'm like, that was good. How good stuff.

SPEAKER_05

Dude, even skeletor question, what is this?

SPEAKER_04

What is this?

SPEAKER_05

What is this?

SPEAKER_04

And while looking the most Jared Leto in person, he's actually he's looked the entire time.

SPEAKER_06

People were wondering, though, some people I had were commenting, why is Leto not even really on the press tour? And then people were like, if you don't look at the credits, you won't even know that's him. Because if you you don't see him, you don't know that's Leto. I didn't know you don't see him, you don't really hear him either.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I didn't know the robot was Christian Wick until the end. Yeah, I looked at all instantly.

SPEAKER_02

I like the craft. Craft was they switched it up on me for that one. But then again, they kind of had to change some of them because every fucking character was a guy. Tila was like the only female on the team aside from the sorceress.

SPEAKER_04

Well, they had to have Tila.

SPEAKER_02

That was kind of Yeah, the love interest throughout the entire series.

SPEAKER_04

I got friend zoned. He did. Quite literally.

SPEAKER_02

What the fuck, man? He never actually ends up with her. It's sad. No matter what series it is.

SPEAKER_07

Is that how you would grab that?

SPEAKER_04

I'm holding a sword. There's gonna be there's gonna be any windows. I really feel that love and patience devotion went into this movie. Like people who watched the cartoon made the movie. I mean, it was who directed it, Travis Knight. He's also also known for Bumblebee. He also did Bumblebee.

SPEAKER_05

Which works.

SPEAKER_04

Oh god.

SPEAKER_01

I almost thought he was gonna be

Travis Knight And Craft Choices

SPEAKER_01

driving a fucking uh Volkswagen Beetle.

SPEAKER_04

So is he just tied to Mattel then?

unknown

I don't know.

SPEAKER_04

If he did Bumblebee, he did this.

SPEAKER_05

It'd be fucking hilarious if he even directed uh Barbie.

SPEAKER_04

No, that was not Barbie. No, no. Wasn't that Greta? Yep.

SPEAKER_07

That was Greta. Let me see here.

SPEAKER_04

You got what he's directed?

SPEAKER_07

Oh, I mean I can go.

SPEAKER_06

Kubo and the two strings. That's animated. Bumblebee, and that's it. He is also directing that. Remember that movie we the animated movie we wanted to do? Wildwood? Travis Knight's doing that. That's Travis Knight's. We like his movies.

SPEAKER_02

I don't think there's one he's done that I haven't.

SPEAKER_04

Kubo and the Two Strings was whatever, but I love Bumblebee. I love He-Man.

SPEAKER_02

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04

I think I will like Wildwood. You think? I put it in the calendar. It's even interesting.

SPEAKER_06

You can I will go see animated movies. They just have to be interesting and not like I'm not gonna go see minions. I'm sorry. That shit's stupid. I'm not no, I'm not. Sorry.

SPEAKER_01

That's like the fourth one.

SPEAKER_06

You get what I'm saying, though? I don't you you like to go see it. It's the kids, I get it.

SPEAKER_01

But I'm not gonna get watch those ones in theater.

SPEAKER_06

I'm not gonna get much interest out of that. I'm gonna be napping or on my phone. He was elite animator on Coraline, so he's kind of in the animation studio realm.

SPEAKER_04

It just looks wildwood. That concept and that story looks cool to me. I'm like, I want him to be hands-on in the next Transformers. What's going on with I Joe? What's going on? We're trying to- Oh, yeah, it should be a crossover. Oh. What happened? I was looking to see what he's got upcoming. Man. Six billion dollar man. This man born in the 80s, you can't do it. Wait, just wait, just wait. I don't know what no, that one was a 70s. Well, I don't know what parinencia is. P-I-R-P-I-R-A-N-E-S-I. He's also in post-production on Wildwood. That's what we just yeah. Yeah. One we just said. That's that one sounds familiar. Well, Wildwood?

SPEAKER_07

No, Parenencia.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, it's starring Mark Wahlberg's $6 million man. That's right.

SPEAKER_06

In an infinite house filled with statues and title waters, a man named Parenthia maps endless corridors while meeting with mysterious visitors. Wait, what's it called? Wait, what's it? P-I-R-A-N-E-S-R. Paranase.

SPEAKER_04

That's a book. I know because I want I'm on Booktube a lot. That's a book. That's a recent book. It's about a house that has a lot of mystical creatures and mystical shit in it. That's all I know because I walk- I listened to a guy reviewed a book. That's a book. Paranasi. I have like, wait, I know, I know what it is. It's a book. So we got that. Paranasi? Paranasi. Paranasi. It's very close to piranha, so I didn't really know where to. Yep. So that's a that's a book. I've been on, I watch a guy who reads books every every month, and he does his top books in a month, and it was on there, so that's where I'm like, where did I hear that from? Book talk, booktubes, it's called. Looking at his oh, looking at some of his photos, and there's some very there are some photos of him that were that his hair just looks absolutely fake.

SPEAKER_07

His hair looks fake in that photo. No. No. That's very good action scenes in He-Man, too.

SPEAKER_04

Review said most of the modes, all of them non-stop action. It was kind of weird for me. Oh, fight scenes were good. Well, they need some action. I might start going. I knew you were standing up a little bit in your seat when it came to the singular He-Man fight in the skull or Snake Mountain. Oh. I'm like, yeah. That's Barbarian Reed. That's Barbarian Reed.

SPEAKER_02

They fucking dog filed him and he did the thing.

SPEAKER_04

Skeletor was the dirtiest shit ever. Oh, you're grieving your dead dad. Yeah. I win. He's dirty ass.

SPEAKER_00

Oh god.

SPEAKER_04

Very 80s. It was very colorful.

SPEAKER_06

I was like, you need some 80s, yeah. When we just we're going back in time now. I had the 90s in backrooms. Now we got the 80s.

SPEAKER_04

Now we need the what's your 70s movie this year? Don't fucking know. You're gonna get Boogie Down? Boogie Nights? Yeah, Boogie Nights. Oh no, I don't know. Boogie. Mark gonna come back. That's a classic right there. What was that for? I don't know what Matt seemed. I was looking at the budgets for both the two movies. He-Man's got a hefty budget. So he-Man's got is 170 to 2 million 200 million dollar budget.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, it's another Transformers

Budgets Box Office And Flop Math

SPEAKER_05

type thing.

SPEAKER_04

Well, Transformer Bumblebee cost 105. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Most of that movie was shot.

SPEAKER_04

In 2016 money. So and guess how much scary movie made or cost? 30. And it's probably gonna do the complete opposite success, right? Yeah. Jesus Christ. It's sad.

SPEAKER_06

Last I heard Scary Movie was again, just projection, you don't know for sure, but I think they had it at like 60 some like no 60 million plus opening weekend. Just domestic, though. That's not even worldwide. That bitch could open to close to 100 million worldwide. And that's already, we're good.

SPEAKER_04

And meanwhile, He-Man could make about 30. Yeah, He Man needs like oh God.

SPEAKER_05

Nobody, it's it's not gonna make its money back.

SPEAKER_04

No. It's uh it's already listed on Wikipedia as one of the biggest flops of the year.

SPEAKER_03

And I'm like, it's so much more punch now now that I think about that. That's a little tour.

SPEAKER_06

Wikipedia's there, man. Wikipedia's there. And I love the movie. I really enjoyed it. Let me go to I want to see if it's maybe I read it wrong, but I swear to God it said it.

SPEAKER_02

I want to see She-Ra as the villain. Absurd. Sorry, I might have spoiled what they were gonna go into there.

unknown

No.

SPEAKER_02

That's technically the next storyline. She's brainwashed by her villain.

SPEAKER_07

They were gonna go into that in the next uh cartoon.

SPEAKER_04

I think don't think they did in the three. Oh no, Wikipedia didn't say it yet, but if you search it, it's already websites calling it one of the biggest flops of the year.

SPEAKER_06

I mean, didn't they kill He-Man off in like the first episode of the most recent adaptation? Yes.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I'm sure that's a step one disrespect.

SPEAKER_05

Yep. They wanted to do Savage He-Man correctly, which I almost thought they were gonna do in the movie, but they didn't.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, we'll make it different. Sometimes different's fucking stupid. People don't you know who headed that project that decided to be different, right?

SPEAKER_06

One of Kevin Smith. Yeah. He ain't perfect. I've seen some of his dumbass shit. He ain't perfect.

SPEAKER_05

I mean, we're dealing with the same thing. When I first watched it, I thought it was woke as fuck. It's like, what's with all these female lead characters? We're C-Man.

SPEAKER_06

I'm a fucking directed tusk. I'm a fucking directed tusk. That's always weird shit.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, we were literally talking about this today with the new God of War. That'll have woke.

SPEAKER_06

That'll have its own section. I'm not different problems, but it's like your audience is a group of people that want to play as Kratos.

SPEAKER_04

And your next main character is a character we have very minimal screen time of. No matter how important she is. Again, I can understand you are handicapped for your potential success. There's one thing I do like they're doing.

SPEAKER_02

And it's that they're giving us the realm of dead gods, where gods go when they die.

SPEAKER_05

The problem is the meme of the game. Because they're centralizing it around Faye, it's called God of War Fei.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

They could have called it something else, with the same premise that they're doing.

SPEAKER_05

But then again, from what I've seen of the game, the entire story has to do with her life and his, how they met everything, and her trying to get back to him.

SPEAKER_04

And being the afterlife of the gods, they missed the golden opportunity. Golden opportunity missed. Because you know who in that motherfucker.

SPEAKER_06

Oh god, Kratos needed to be there, Zeus. Oh, you motherfucker. You mother. Real beef real beef on site. Motherfucker. Hey, he's down here. Get him.

SPEAKER_05

Jump him. I would have thought you had more issues with how uh jump him.

SPEAKER_04

That's that.

unknown

What?

SPEAKER_04

I'm not saying her name right. Sekmet. Sekmet. She's fine. She's a green. And she's not have done have the head of a lion, but whatever. I'll deal with it. They nailed the fucking Mongolian god, though. I can deal with it. Okay, back to He-Man. That video games will have its own thing. There just was a there just was a smorgasbord of fucking video game news. Yeah, yeah, man. And all of us are video game players, so it's not gonna get touched on a lot.

SPEAKER_00

He-Man!

SPEAKER_02

That's having a lot of fun with the uh sword of power. I can hold it like a keyblade.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, but you can't swing it around by the same tactical anyway. And the funny thing is, He-Man's actually got decent fucking reviews, too. Decent. Not what's the kill it with the tomato meter and all that?

SPEAKER_05

Tomato meter.

SPEAKER_04

Well, the tomato meter broke a scary movie. I won't I didn't see what it was for.

SPEAKER_06

67% and 87. That's very good. That's very good. What the fuck? That's very good, but it flopped.

SPEAKER_04

It's it hasn't flopped yet. It's going to. I mean, shit. Let me see here. It's gonna be another Transformers 1.

SPEAKER_07

Well, Transformers 1 did alright.

SPEAKER_04

It didn't get good reviews, but I thought it did alright box office wise. Don't think so.

SPEAKER_06

Box Office Mojo, huh? Oh, they just fucking scary movie ain't even there, so that's wrong. It's a 27,000 the last time I updated it for Scary Movies, so. Scary something's wrong. Scary movies bugged out, so it's not enough. He-Man apparently did 11.7 million on Friday. Scary movie did like 20 something, 24. So he scary movies number one. Backrooms, another 8 million. Obsession, 7 God Obsession. Holy fuck, go away. This will not go away. 709.

SPEAKER_03

Did it?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. It will not go away. Oh, 4.3. You go away, amazing digital circus. You go away. What the hell are you doing? You go away.

SPEAKER_04

And cost roughly the same amount of money that he manned. That's gonna matchbox the movie? Oh, okay. Never mind. Apple Studios. The Michael movie is just doing what we thought it would. It just hey, eat the eat the out. You mean the Germain movie? Mattel is Got him. I got him. Jermaine. Fuck off, Gary movie.

SPEAKER_05

Germaine. Mattel's planning on making a Thomas and Friends live action movie.

SPEAKER_00

What?

SPEAKER_05

A Barney. Oh god. American Girl. I'm not sure what the fuck that one's about. What the fuck? Here's the character.

Mattel Movie Universe Gets Wild

SPEAKER_05

Bob the Builder.

SPEAKER_04

Oh no. Oh no. Live action Bob the Builder?

SPEAKER_07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Oh no. I thought Bob the Builder wasn't Mattel. They must have acquired the rights. Can we fix it? Yes. Oh God, why is that? That's gonna go just as well as Harold and the purple brand.

SPEAKER_05

Now this one's probably gonna be a horror movie. I can easily see it. Magic A-ball.

unknown

Oh, great.

SPEAKER_05

I had actually heard about that one.

SPEAKER_04

Did we send each other that Barney horror movie? Oh no.

SPEAKER_01

Is that what that was gonna be?

SPEAKER_04

That would have worked, but that's not what they're doing. I couldn't find anything for the horror movie other than that AI generated movie.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, that's a horror movie. A24 producing it.

SPEAKER_04

Uh-oh. Uh-oh. No, but I heard it wasn't horror. I heard it wasn't horror. The early synopsis said there wasn't going to be. It was gonna be more adult themed, but it wasn't gonna be horror. How the fuck you make Barney adult themed? By helping adults like Sonic. Okay.

SPEAKER_07

I'm interested in the Hot Wheels movie.

SPEAKER_02

Sure. Shall you make a fucking Oh my I don't know, they made a TV show about it once.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, and it wasn't that bad.

SPEAKER_04

No, it wasn't.

SPEAKER_05

Monster High, Dean.

SPEAKER_04

Great.

SPEAKER_05

Those fucking dolls.

SPEAKER_04

Great. Fucking great. That's what Dean needs in a live action.

SPEAKER_05

Exactly. You're gonna go see that. I know you are.

SPEAKER_04

They cast Cindy Sweeney in it.

SPEAKER_05

It's like, hey, I'm gonna go see it.

SPEAKER_04

That's Frankenstein. Go be a good stepdad. Molly Pocket. Oh, for what? How about this? Rock'em sock'em robots. I thought they did that already. I thought that was real steel. Yeah. Uno.

SPEAKER_05

What the fuck? How are you doing these movies? I don't know. I don't know. That one doesn't that's not attached to anyone, but it has to be.

SPEAKER_04

Uno would be an excellent horror movie. Yes! Uno. They're a horror movie. Imagine a tattooed man.

SPEAKER_01

What is that?

SPEAKER_04

I almost thought you were gonna say Tony the Tiger in the movie. What the fuck? No, he's just he's just a hell no. View Master.

SPEAKER_05

I don't know what that is. It's that fucking red toy where you have the dial up top. Oh, click here and you'll see scenes.

SPEAKER_04

Horror movie. There's a horror movie. Oh, where's the light break movie?

SPEAKER_01

No. We get Wishbone? What? Oh we're getting a wishbone? What the fuck are you doing? We already have those.

SPEAKER_04

Mattel Plan movies. We already have Wishbone movies. They're old as fuck. This is by Universal Pictures. So who knows? I'm still being taken out by Bob by Bob the Builder to movie. Rock'em sock'em robots.

SPEAKER_01

Uh-huh. One race films, Universal Pictures. Set the star Vin Diesel. Oh my.

SPEAKER_04

No, he should be in the Hot Wheels movie.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, he's good. Oh God. Bob.

SPEAKER_04

I'm still God, Bob, get out of my head. Please. Bob the Builder is being done with the Ramels. What the

SPEAKER_00

No, Bob.

SPEAKER_04

We can't fix team.

SPEAKER_06

No, you can't, because I'm destroyed because of all the inappropriate fucking jokes I've seen adult fucking TV shows do for Bob the Builder. No, no.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, fuck you, family guy. You need to stop. Oh, hell no.

SPEAKER_05

You know the guy that was in Transformers? Yeah, that guy. I don't know. He's directing it. The one that teamed up with uh Mirage. Anthony Ramos?

SPEAKER_04

Anthony Ramos.

SPEAKER_05

Ramos?

SPEAKER_04

Mirage, voice by voice by your favorite, Pete Davidson. Now he's going to now he's gonna teach you how to rob a bank. I'm actually interested in this. I want to see that one.

SPEAKER_07

He's doing Bob the Builder.

SPEAKER_06

Can we fix it? Yes, we can. Oh god, they're gonna fucking voice act all the fucking all his stuff. Oh god, his fucking hammer and his fuck. Oh no. I want to see it.

SPEAKER_04

These are gonna do so well because Dora did so well.

SPEAKER_05

I don't even want to know how Thomas and Friends is gonna be because Dean's just gonna be there. Diesel, Diesel, Diesel.

SPEAKER_01

No, Dee's in a jet plane. Oh no, we're taking it anyway. No, he'd fucking hate us. He wouldn't even go. He'd have to drag his ass to it and tape his eyes open.

SPEAKER_04

His wife shut his eyes.

SPEAKER_01

Yes.

SPEAKER_00

Yes. Oh no, it came back to my head, the song. Ah, damn it. Yeah, there's something like that. So much in love with the sky. Son of a bad. No. Did you sing in love with the sky like this?

SPEAKER_05

That's the song.

SPEAKER_04

That's the fucking song I remember. I should sing it to J. JJ. Like, don't you sing that to me.

SPEAKER_07

I should. Well, Mattel ain't gonna be making many movies if their shit keeps flapping.

SPEAKER_00

It's like, my god.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, Amazon produced this one, hence why they were okay running somebody over with an Amazon truck. Bezos, use the truck. Alright, good marketing. It's the only thing in the movie that delivered. Bang! Oh, that was low. Because I know you kind of you enjoyed the movie too. That was low. I was okay with it. I didn't enjoy it as much as you did.

SPEAKER_07

Oh, God.

SPEAKER_04

I don't know how I feel about Adam being chief HR. That's where I'm kind of drawing a line and having it hard to cross.

SPEAKER_05

Alright, alright. I'm gonna label some 80s cartoons. Let's see how you feel about it turning into live action. Nope. Now this one is teasing Dean right away. Thundercats. No.

SPEAKER_04

No, we can't do a live-action

Which Cartoons Should Stay Animated

SPEAKER_04

Thundercats. Why not? Because Cats the movie, fuck that. He's got a point. Because that shit was creepy. That shit was weird. You can do a CGI movie. Sure. And even that might look weird.

SPEAKER_05

So you're talking Miraza to Teenage Wing Ninja Turtles.

SPEAKER_03

Yes, you can do the claymation 38D animation kind of stuff. Sure. Alright. Oh, that this one's hilarious because of what we just watched.

SPEAKER_02

Thundar, the Barbarian. Do you know that one need?

SPEAKER_07

Oh, I I have the just exactly.

SPEAKER_04

No. Why? Why are you looking it up? Because I want to get it. You don't even have the most famous picture up.

SPEAKER_06

No.

SPEAKER_04

The butthole.

SPEAKER_06

Absolutely not.

SPEAKER_04

Who the fuck made oh god.

SPEAKER_03

I don't think you're gonna be happy with that answer.

SPEAKER_05

We're already getting this one. Voltron.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, with Henry Cabell.

SPEAKER_05

Ah yeah.

SPEAKER_04

It's not that's got Henry Cabell. He's gonna be biased as hell.

SPEAKER_01

Yep. Technically, we already got this one. Dungeons and Dragons.

SPEAKER_04

A good one. We're waiting on the sequel.

SPEAKER_00

That well, is it did they ever confirm one? No. It didn't make us money. It didn't make enough money.

SPEAKER_04

Well, that's because they released it during COVID.

SPEAKER_00

Let's release it now.

SPEAKER_02

That that it's uh and I guess they are working on this one. Mask. Ever heard of that one? Not Jim Carrey. No, no, no, not that mask.

SPEAKER_05

Literally, M dot A dot A dot oh A twice.

SPEAKER_02

Spell out mask, but with dots in between because it's fucking makes sense.

SPEAKER_04

M dot A dot.

SPEAKER_02

Why everything gotta have multiple movies on Mattel will be like we're gonna make a universe that it's technically in the same universe as GI Joe and Transformers.

SPEAKER_04

I mean was the most transform recent Transformers movie one, the animated one?

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

That's the most recent one, right? Yes. Oh yeah, and that kind of flopped too. Yep.

SPEAKER_02

Hey, this one's kind of funny. We got a Garfield movie. What about Heathcliff?

SPEAKER_04

You can stop. Yeah, you're still off the trail. We're starting to get into weird shit.

SPEAKER_05

Fine. How about toys? How would you turn a toy into a movie? We have that Toy Story.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

No, no, no, not that one.

SPEAKER_06

You don't need any other movie about toys.

SPEAKER_05

No, because then you just go look in mom's toy drawer and you find something else.

SPEAKER_04

No, no, that's okay. I can't even laugh at that no more because it's so overplayed by the internet. I can't even laugh at that no more.

SPEAKER_06

Well no, we're getting Toy Story 5, the fucking series that should have probably ended two movies ago, but keep that going.

SPEAKER_04

Keep it going. And they're still good each time.

SPEAKER_05

It's stupid. David bringing back shit from Toy Story 2. Bringing back all the buzzes. People bitch.

SPEAKER_04

Like, no, Toy Story 3 was the perfect ending. Stop it. No, we're gonna make two more. It makes money. They're gonna get another one out. It's like, what the f now technology is the enemy. Toy Story 6 should be like AI or something. Oh god. Unfortunately, the only way these movies are probably gonna end is if Hanks and Alan just eventually say no.

SPEAKER_01

Not one of them are gonna say no.

SPEAKER_06

That's not fine that one of them's gonna have to die. And I'm not even saying it as a negative. I'm just saying. That's very dark. I know. She's gonna keep going with Toy Story. Jesus. I mean, this looks like kind of a Jesse movie. I mean, that's like different. I mean, Jesse seems to be forefront in the movie. Shit.

SPEAKER_04

Whatever. That's her kid. Yeah. Like, geez. The boy toys are secondary. Yo, where my motherfucker said Sid back. That I'll be in there. Hey, there's Sid. He did come back. He was a garbage man. He was a garbage man. Three or four. Three. Four. Garbage. Oh, yeah. It was a cameo. It wasn't like a big fucking thing. You got you blinking your missile. That was funny. That was funny. Oh man. Oi, oi, oi.

SPEAKER_06

But again, another movies that are just drowning in the box office that will never get nothing. They laid three post-credit scenes for more. Like, I said, like, my god, they blow in their wad. Like, look at all this shit. Look at all this shit that's coming. Look what we can give you. We didn't make no money. Fuck. Why'd we do it? Look what we can give you.

SPEAKER_04

Why do we do all them post-credit scenes?

SPEAKER_05

There is so much lore to this universe. Give us the money.

SPEAKER_03

So the so if this movie doesn't make any money in the box office, the only thing that's going to save it is if it gets any kind of streaming success. It's the only thing that's going to save it.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, because just because it's going to Amazon.

SPEAKER_06

Just because it don't make money doesn't necessarily mean it's a killer for a sequel, but it did you making money almost guarantees that shit.

SPEAKER_04

They're probably. You mean like white chicks too? Oh, that's going to happen, though.

SPEAKER_06

That's going to happen. I guarantee it. They interviewed Marlon Williams. They he literally said, Hey, if Scare Movie 6 is a success, not I will give you white chicks too, and don't be a medicine sauce such a while drinking your juice in the hood, too. I'm like, come on.

SPEAKER_04

That's coming now. He

Scary Movie 6 Highlights And Misses

SPEAKER_04

seriously said don't be a menace. Yes, yes. You know that movie? Yes. Good man. That's one of my favorites. I mean, deal fucking crack up because I was quoting the movie. You get a point.

SPEAKER_05

You get points. He didn't fucking believe me.

SPEAKER_04

You started with zero.

SPEAKER_05

I'm white. They're already going to start me below zero.

SPEAKER_01

He's a great artist. Funny as hell. But yes, continue. I'm from Wisconsin too, so that's like, oh yeah, you negative 20, bro.

SPEAKER_04

No, I love that movie. I just don't put a denoun. JJ still does that. Oddest movies, then. Bunny flip-flop.

SPEAKER_00

I couldn't believe I seen fucking white chicks in Scary Movie.

SPEAKER_05

I don't think I could pick a favorite scene out of that movie.

SPEAKER_02

Hold my poodle. Hold my poodle.

SPEAKER_04

You're just gonna keep quoting that one instead of scary movie, or what are you flip-flopping? Half the quote from Scary Movie, you can't say. What? Oh god. You have to scene files unredacted?

SPEAKER_06

Oh no. One of my favorites was still uh the spin-off of not not of Get Out. Not just the K-pop demon hunters, which was funny as fuck.

SPEAKER_03

I showed that to my mom and dad and they actually laughed.

SPEAKER_06

The dude in his underwear running.

SPEAKER_04

Then later, I'm Uncle Ray gonna get you. Uncle Ray gonna get you. You know what I couldn't tell? Was that his nephew or a different dude? It was a different dude. It wasn't his nephew.

SPEAKER_05

Okay. That'd have been a whole different fucking joke. Wait, but that was a nephew. That was his son.

SPEAKER_03

His son.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. It wasn't a nephew. Right. You know the late the the literally her character was Nurse Ratchet, the nurse? That was a Wayans. There's a lot now. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, the chief detective that said they got the wrong guy, that's that's Wayne's.

SPEAKER_04

Yep. That that's a clan. That's a clan. They cut a lot.

SPEAKER_03

Watch how you say that, bro. That's a clan.

SPEAKER_04

I saw I saw a couple of things that they cut. That they had to cut. They cut up they had additional scenes with little hand. But they cut most of that. They had a completely different ending. The ending they did was fine. Well, I wonder what the other ending was. I'm not mad at the ending they gave us. No.

SPEAKER_02

That was totally geared at us. As much as he doesn't want to be a part of it. What? The ending of that movie.

SPEAKER_04

Oh.

SPEAKER_02

Because you're 70, you know?

SPEAKER_04

Well, I don't know what you're talking about. No. No. No. No. That was another funny movie that was. That one's very negative from critics, but that's normal. You expect that one to be.

SPEAKER_01

There's no plot.

SPEAKER_04

It has the highest. Well, there ain't no plot to that. It's literally a bunch of S and L skits kind of strung together the best they can. That's what Scary Movie is, but that's why I like it. It has a high audience score. It's not like 70% for audience score. All the other ones are like 50. Except for five. Scary Movie 5 needs to go away. I can't remember that one for sure. No, that one's terrible. That was not. I don't think I ever saw five. That's the only one that is objectively terrible. One, classic, two, classic. Three, actually, very good. Four has Matt's favorite scene. Very good. This is Detroit after the attack.

SPEAKER_03

I only make the joke because of you.

SPEAKER_04

As the Lions fan.

SPEAKER_00

Oh God.

SPEAKER_04

I know Chicago Bears are going to Indiana. That shit is still funny as a bitch.

SPEAKER_00

Like.

SPEAKER_04

How are they? The Bears! The Chicago Bears. The Indiana Bears. Hammond Bears.

SPEAKER_07

My god.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my god. Yeah, I don't remember that one at all. That didn't even make me laugh. Not once. I'm just like, this is kind of stupid. I don't think I saw it. It was so stupid.

SPEAKER_02

Did it have any of the original characters in it?

SPEAKER_04

Charlie Sheen was in there. But he wasn't in there. He wasn't original. He was from Charlie Sheen was in three, but that's the only one that's kind of and the and his and his and George was in there too. Simon Rex. Other than that, no. I'm surprised he didn't show up.

SPEAKER_05

No, they made the dad to her two Cindy's two kids.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

What the hell was his name?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

The first one. Bobby? Bobby.

SPEAKER_04

I wish I would have he would have been in there more.

SPEAKER_06

He had like one cameo. This is your imagination. John Abrams. I mean, to be fair, that the her kid has changed sex now, technically, because he was a boy in three and four.

SPEAKER_03

Wrong one. Oh. That was little dick, baby dick.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, they recalled that. We still know. What?

SPEAKER_01

I just love how he passes out after the fact, too.

SPEAKER_04

Then he he has his baby dick in his hand. Magnifying. Oh, hold on, hold on. I gotta show you.

SPEAKER_07

Oh god.

SPEAKER_04

Who else wasn't in there? I mean, God. They did not bring um what's her name? Sharon Elizabeth. They did not bring Buffy back. Buffy Gilmore from the first one. They didn't bring Buffy back. No, no, they didn't. The redhead. They didn't bring her back. She also played Justice in Jay and Silent Pop Shik's fan. But to Jay, she was boom boom kitty fucker. Charlie Sheen got mentioned, but wasn't in the movie. The Wayans were mainly bringing back mostly their characters. Yeah, from one and two. Yeah. Except for Shaq. Yeah, but he was only in one scene in the other. You were only in one scene. He could have brought back Dr. Phil, too. That would have been funny as hell. That would have been funny. It was Dr.

SPEAKER_00

Phil and Shaq as the killers.

SPEAKER_04

No, we're killing. Oh no, the president. Yeah. Mr. President. He would have came back. This role would have been more fun. No, no, so that's no, then what you did was is bring in Liam Neeson.

SPEAKER_03

That was the obvious joke.

SPEAKER_04

That was the obvious that was right there.

SPEAKER_05

The next one.

SPEAKER_04

It was there. Well, they'll do another one, another scary movie, of course, but. Top movies on their list of spoof next is backrooms and obsession. And they already did it in one in the trailer. They already did backrooms in the trailer. Oh, yeah. One of the trailers. They teased it open like they do with backroom shots on the coup.

SPEAKER_07

He's into back again.

SPEAKER_04

Got a success story for the weekend box office, a scary movie, and possible flop from Masters of the Universe.

SPEAKER_05

Well, no, I'm sad about that. I really am, especially after seeing it.

What Saves A Sequel After Theaters

SPEAKER_06

It was on the list. I seen it on the list so far. This came up once before. Nope, just me and Matt talking, not on the podcast, but I brought up to him list of mov a pop people I listened to did uh movie percentage chances of flopping.

SPEAKER_04

And a lot of movies came out. Masters of the Universe was pretty high. They were like, this is flop written all over it. No matter if it's good or not. They all voted Mandalorian and Girl Glu a flop, which I don't know if that's a flop, but it's under it's underperforming. It's not gonna look at Flocked Office on that one. What? Box office on that one. It's not doing pathetic, but it's not what Disney wants. It's third material. Is it gonna drop all the way to like six or seven this week now? Because of behind the big four? Yeah, yeah. Session is one of the big ones. Oh god, good times. Sitting at 258 million. What was its budget? 165. 165. So it needed to make 330.

SPEAKER_06

You gotta at least double your budget first. That's like step one.

SPEAKER_04

That's no advertising whatsoever. It still had advertising budget, but it's gotta make 330.

SPEAKER_06

That's kind of my goal. That's kind of my benchmark, everyone says.

SPEAKER_04

You gotta at least double your budget. Then you're then we'll see what happens. Doubling your budget is gets you the movie making. It's the advertisements.

SPEAKER_03

And with I mean, I I just realized, Dean. But we've seen two movies with He-Man in it.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, I like that actor. I love I love him. I follow him on Instagram.

SPEAKER_07

He was in Cheap Detective. Yeah, I know that.

SPEAKER_04

Now he's being talked into Star Wind Marvel.

SPEAKER_06

I seen him on the I seen an interview with him on one at the premiere of He-Man. They were interviewing him and they're asking him, like, what are some roles you you'd like to take on? You've done He-Man. He said, Well, he's English, so he has that strong accent. He's like, and I almost and I seen it now. I'm like, yes, you need to give me this now. But he said, uh, I'm a huge Resident Evil fan, and I would love to play Leon Kennedy. And I'm like, come on, right now, right now, right now, Craig, I don't care. Post credit. Come on, now, now. That is cut that blonde hair. That is fucked. He's already got that. But also to be Leon, you gotta be able to hit them cheap ass one-liners that are as stupid as a bitch, and I think he can do it.

SPEAKER_04

And he also is a big Elden Ring fan. Also, Elden Ring. I put way too much time into that, into that game. Yeah. By A24. A24 is doing Elden Ring. Oh no. You gotta be a little happy about it. Oh boy.

SPEAKER_05

So he's got he's got that like dishwater blonde hair, so as long as he doesn't lighten it like he did for this one.

SPEAKER_04

He's he's Resident Evil 4 Leon, like very closely. Oh god.

SPEAKER_03

You have a buddy that would tell you Rock!

SPEAKER_04

Give me opinion! He's probably too busy creaming in his pants for a Veronica movie, which I love fucking game. Oh, you said movie. I was like, I thought it was just a game. Oh. We're getting a resume of a movie, but it's gonna make everyone divided.

SPEAKER_00

Oh shit.

SPEAKER_04

You're still happy about the dishwasher scene. The dishwasher scene. Oh, wrong movie. Oh, it's Evil Dead. You're talking about Evil Dead.

SPEAKER_06

I'm like dishwasher scene. Oh yeah, the dishwasher scene. That Matt says I should be institutionalized because I said, you know what? Kind of made me horny that scene, Matt institutionalized him right now.

SPEAKER_05

It's just a woman on top of him. That's all that.

SPEAKER_04

She's bouncing! Well is he the knives go in deeper and shit. Oh god, I do need help. Oh shit. He likes being caused pain. So he is a pain. That's true. To certain people.

SPEAKER_07

Oh I am. I am.

unknown

Oh god.

SPEAKER_04

Let's see. Anything. Oh wait. Next and He-Man just gonna keep fading because more movies are coming out to hurt it. It's sad. Yeah. I want it to do well. It

Release Calendar Anxiety And Big Competition

SPEAKER_04

ain't. I mean, I don't know. I don't think disclosure day is gonna hurt it much, but then when Toy Story comes out, it's a toy story's gonna hurt. It's as good as dead. Because all the kiddies, all the kids. Well, they they they Yeah, you've got three of them that want to go.

SPEAKER_06

Nope. They failed at one thing because I read something that He-Man was they wanted to they didn't get out as many as their fans of the 80s cartoons and shit. They completely failed to get them out because nobody cared. They were that's a big target of this movie, was that Gen X, I think it was. I think that's Gen X. Yep. And they didn't come out and drove like they thought they would.

SPEAKER_04

Should I have asked my dad to go there?

SPEAKER_07

Oh god.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, pretty as early as I can buy them.

SPEAKER_06

Movies flop and and fail, because let's see, Toy Story's coming out and then Supergirls on the horizon, which still also has bust potential. It sadly does. The reviews have been pretty good though, from early people watching it. They've said it's very good, but that would agree.

SPEAKER_05

Too many scenes are releasing online.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, Supergirl has has fly has has flop potential. It is a cop. No, it's just the shop portion is what you're opening up. But I but that's also the only place where you can get the liquid in. No. No, it's not. There's plenty of places to get the liquid in.

SPEAKER_07

Dude.

SPEAKER_04

What are you doing, bro? I did it again, did I? Oh I did it again. You did it on purpose. I did. I did it. Come on Brittany. Also gotta mention this guy. No, that Brittany Spears shit.

SPEAKER_06

I don't give a fuck. Still still took me out. I was looking out the window and there's an ice raid going on. That shit took me out.

SPEAKER_00

I'm like No, I'm losing all my workers.

SPEAKER_06

I mean sorry I'm too white and lazy that and uh grabbing some little hand from the bus depot there's our suspect get him he's a little on the white side no he's black I know what he's resisting oh god I think I can't I can't say too much about super girl I don't know yet even though the whole plot is revolving around saving crypto again I like the casts in there I think supergirls casted good the Lobo mean the two people that you care about yeah Lobo's come on Mamola's that's that's a great Lobo I don't know anybody else in that movie you barely even know who Supergirl is supergirl I don't think he cares he should a little bit he got one he cares about what Lobo yup Lobo my boy that's the main man who knows how much is actually in the movie oh god me why was Lobo only in it five minutes you were worried you're gonna fall in love with that battle cat was gonna be your favorite character and then he was I just said that the whole movie's going on we see him as a as a cub and then like where the fuck is Battlecat is he even in this movie in prison yeah in prison he's been caged like what the fuck oh god where's cringe he's cringing in a corner somewhere now odyssey is the weird one because that motherfucker is expensive as fuck and I have no doubt it'll make money but my god Nolan you know how much money you gotta make for that bitch yeah how long do we have to do that one again almost four hours number three hours we're gonna trick through that one P Brick I mean no no nothing no nothing will ever beat Dortwinder fucking bullshit that one was it over yet we literally thought we had set through this whole movie we thought it ended four times intermission two hours fifty two minutes budget 250 million gave us a intermission card it's gotta make 500 million even be in the conversation oh my what the Odyssey's gotta make 500 million to break even to start yeah you gotta double your budget normally ain't no way it's making a fucking billion it it could it's not impossible I'll be the definitive answer on that yeah so it's gonna make 500 million two weeks before Superman or Spider-Man I was gonna say two weeks later then here comes the big Cahun and a kill every movie known the map I said no way it has a week and where it's getting where you get Voter City and evil dead burn it's not stealing anything from those hey then you get Spider-Man Spider-Man's data I don't think it matters I money the sad part is we always talk about this yet we're the motherfuckers who always just go here's our money and then you're fine but then Spider-Man's just chilling all summer just da da da da da da da and nobody wanted to release near it so down and there clear out supertroopers three we just saw you just you just saw the trailer for Mutiny Jason Satham how to rob a bank coyote vs acme playface resident evil forgotten island street fighter is coming in there in that's October I know but as I'm said it's coming you're getting closer to it no they that then December a couple more big codes that ain't changing their dates that's gonna be fun hold that's gonna be fun see Toy Story 5 Supergirl Independence Day Independence Day Independence Day that's just what's labeled in the Saturdays hey Independence Day better be making another one of those oh god Will Smith is gonna show up and no he's dead he died in between two and one I was like Independence Day what the fuck now you've got his son oh god Kitsune Khan he like fucking blink tells me saying that Odyssey there's a week in between that I keep forgetting to tell fucking Ryan about that I really do even though he won't care for what I gotta I have to I have to meet I gotta go up there for a day at least to Kitsune because Michelle Ruff's gonna be here that's the American voice of Yoko and I don't know when I'm gonna get a chance to see her again so there I go ice cream man Ryan bring your flag ice cream man oh yeah you want to know what's gonna kill Spider-Man that Spider-Man brand new day oh and then at the very end of the month I still have idiots that's the WMI movie otherwise August don't you say shit September how to rub a bank playface that's looking good from what from their trailer that's looking interesting horror movie October Verity Oh Dakota Johnson Ann Hathaway in a sexy charged movie like hey Street Fighter hey Wildwood hey hey god they keep on coming November twin cities con okay that's all we have for November so far November chilling I mean I can tell you we'll start out in November uh December Avengers Doomsday and Dune and my guilty pleasure movie Violent Night yeah still waiting on the trailer for that one oh you know where's Onslaught you didn't say Onslaught oh you don't have Hunger Games on there for November what I wouldn't what Hunger Games for November when so it'd be whatever the Saturday is before the 24th or the Friday before the 24th there's a risk twin cities what which one which one I have to wait that's fine. I want to see it but that's fine the problem with Hunger Games though is how dedicated he is to that joke is he might go in there to sleep on purpose.

He-Man Quotes Sword Bits And Innuendo

SPEAKER_04

I fucked with him the last trailer the whole trailer he said sleeping I leaned over I purposely did this went over look at him the music started playing up it's just so funny because they're not boring there's a lot of good action in there they're not even boring and it's fun it's just funny that joke will never die no because do you just have an uh uh round against skeletor or something missing half your sword are you gonna fill it with water see if it works what I told you the only place I know who's that fucking thing no no yes I want the power he man well now I gotta hit you with it no wait what did he say in the movie oh balls talking on my thighs he literally said once he-man powered up again oh balls yes may be my favorite line in the entire movie balls balls oh my god but no unless this opens up here and I can't make it pretty fucking sure I tried spinning it it won't come off oh there we go it's not a very big con we're doing is talking about a sword we're getting so many innuendos it's based in the old nerf god it's the same wrap and bass what wrap the bass why can you talk about a weapon and get nothing but innuendos well it's with a sword it's not hard really with a sword it's not hard you have to have a hard sword you go into battle with a floppy sword nothing good's gonna come of that nothing good's gonna come of that oh my gosh so no we're not both getting hit don't no I see that vase how many questions are you gonna get swagger on like that's the actual cup I know that's why it has a handle what do you have why do you have a vase it does look like a vase oh September 4th is Onslaught okay because that's that's shooting up my list of anticipated i i that looks so fun you mean Wonder Woman what she still remembered to be playing Wonder Woman oh okay okay I was like oh the main in Os in Onslaught that's Jason Mamola's girlfriend yeah okay I don't know how I feel about Lobo dating Wonder Woman but uh probably wasn't a first that one may have been oh boy that's probably not something that's been done done yet dun done yeah I called that one I remember now yeah I called that one out as totally a U movie Onslaught? Yeah oh yeah it's it's looks like an action movie it's like a horror action the other thing is it hits a trigger as soon as we see that A24 roll across the screen it's yep alright it's and A24 gave me back room so it did redeem itself so I'm back on the train. Just because your rom com fuck that movie fuck that I'm just gonna bring it up right now Nolan is due for a bust jump saying you're talking about Odyssey uh I'm just gonna put that in the air he did remember he did make tenant I had no issue with that I did I had no issue with that it was still a confusing as fuck movie oh it was Pattinson didn't know when he died in the movie because it was filmed in fucking exactly only he knew how the fuck it was gonna end.

SPEAKER_06

I seen that no I seen that shit with Levi in theaters me and him were like he wanted to go see it and he dragged me along I probably was willing to go but we was that I don't fucking know the fuck that was same shit with Lighthouse.

SPEAKER_04

I still don't know what that was neither one of us could fucking explain that one.

SPEAKER_06

I don't know what that movie and there ain't no way we're gonna even try all I remember from that movie is but here's the thing some motherfucker would literally say oh but the the drama was a great movie you liked lighthouse I didn't say I like lighthouse at least it gave me some wild shit I seen Willem the foe fuck a squid this is a very weird straw at least it gave me some shit drama gave me nothing it's a very thick straw and I think it's trendy here for some like listen I'm gonna beat that A24 because what nice nice I was gonna say I'm gonna beat that joke A24 got it I'm gonna beat that joke until it and for probably the rest of the year with the D okay Michael fuck it's Germain now fuck that fuck that now goddammit I didn't expect that Germaine what you do know that we would totally go to oh yeah Germain if they made the entire movie welcome to Goodburger welcome to Goodburger home of the Goodburger may I take your order oh god would you like Ed special sauce with that? No he had Dave's special talk instead of that oh yeah classic fisting things no oh Dave's hot chicken again just

Game News Overload And Studio Trust

SPEAKER_06

now we were on movies no probably real ugly head again we did have a lot of game news and I know Matt was pretty excited about Travis Willingham I I sent him that and he seen it way before I even well I saw the announcement but I didn't have an audio clip until you said it to me really I I like it and I have to tune in now especially to I I already made the joke it's like oh great so Matt was on stage to announce the game when it was making his things and but his favorite character is Sephiroth and one of his best friends gets Sephiroth.

SPEAKER_05

Matt's gonna be like how he feels about that like internally feels about that.

SPEAKER_04

He's probably happy to be in the studio with him but not the game he's Vincent so it's not that but he got that without being Sephiroth and you know he would have cat wanted Sephiroth over all of it there's no doubt he could have done it. Mercer's right I'm just more confused at why Heckland didn't come back.

SPEAKER_01

All it said was scheduling issues. So they couldn't schedule around it? I d I don't know. It confused the shit out of me when I looked it up he's doing Superman anymore.

SPEAKER_04

Very true very true talked about God of war what else do you want to talk about? Maybe he's doing something we don't know about hasn't been announced yet. Well got God of War I still laugh at because I another the controversy we want to play as Kratos what? Actually I and Matt under Matt Matt under I want to play as Loki. No but you're Petreus you're kind of different for that you're in the minority on that one a lot of people don't know because here's the Petraeus is so hated.

SPEAKER_02

He is a legacy character so what is the best thing to do after killing off your main character create a game based off the legacy character and Loki has a shit ton of mythology to follow they covered but if you're gonna do a God of War game in the underworld and Kratos is dead well we totally have God of war games with Kratos where he's dead like we're seeing right now which you're probably posturing because they let led up in the story saying he was going to die.

SPEAKER_04

Like that was their big thing at the end of the first game and he's never dead fuckers ain't bad dude dude well they're make they were making too much fucking money off of him being the main character so and it's just the This is why they're experimenting with Faye.

SPEAKER_05

Well they they're sitting there like there I also seen a theory that they're using her as a template for the remake of the original trilogy because you see how she can jump around and swing the fucking shit around like he does with his chains.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah she got that she she got that goddamn Stellarblade combat you're gonna love that when and my Stellar Blade 2 did get confirmed by the way I got my first trailer.

SPEAKER_04

Speaking of confirmation the trash the last Ronin oh yeah I didn't even expect him to see the trailer movie got canceled I didn't even see the trailer you didn't even really get any gameplay you just got a Stuart costume Wolverine looks fun as hell the only thing I'm not liking about that game is the facial features fun as hell fucker heals he goes as long as you are fighting and angry you can heal I like the trailer to show some saber tooth I was like oh make a red oh this game won't crack it's insomniac it's the fucking Spider-Man team well it's in the same universe as your Spider-Man don't give me that gabby man it's older the X-Men don't exist where weren't we also supposed to get like what what was that old Captain America game that was that got pushed to 2027. Yeah that got pushed I believe for Captain America Black Panther movie game that got pushed I actually became more interested in that story I think it was in I think it looked interesting what else was announced you you actually watched it they showed more stuff for the for Tomb Raider the new Tomb Raider I didn't see stuff for Tomb Raider which looks really fun and really good a little disappointed they changed the actress but she still looks fine so not a big deal about Grand Theft Auto that is sacrilege the world cares about Grand Theft Auto we've been waiting for it for fucking how many fucking years I I don't care anymore they've killed five so fucking much I don't care anymore. I'm sorry we all know what I am the minority I know my points go to I don't care either I didn't play but I didn't try to care I'm not I'm just saying I haven't cared since San Andreas I respect aura and when no

Resident Evil Remakes And Xbox Complaints

SPEAKER_04

fucking game wants to release anywhere fucking near you you are like the Spider-Man of video I don't understand this one Star Wars Zero Company a new XCOM style turn based strategy game oh this one I thought this was gonna be an Assassin's Creed Witch game 1666 Amsterdam what the fuck what what the fuck is that Mexican ninja thank god that's what it says Mexican ninja roguelike beat'em up game fighting back against Narcozas narcotics and yakuza slammed together narcusa anything but the narcusa game fest what it was see if we got anything here well yeah I knew about Revelation been waiting on that more DLC for Street Fighter Tifa Tifa I'm excited about that cellar blade blood raid yes I watched it oh my fucking god yes it's not a fucking sword anymore she's got a gauntlet she's punching shit oh my god oh no that's my baby that game's my baby oh I love the original I'm interested in this one the Wolf Among Us 2 I don't think Dean's a real fan of the Telltale games no I'm I know I'm uh I will be back playing those because they announced until dawn too that's them turn based style adventure choose your path game or you choose shit I love until I loved until dawn and I they finally announced until dawn too DLC DLC Among Us story on Darn I don't think any one of us has played Among Us at all we just know the jokes and memes There's more for Monster Hunter Wilds. I think it was like an expansion. The Blood of Dawnlocker. The vampire game. Yep, I've seen stuff for that. From the people who made The Witcher. I'm still waiting for more news on Siri's Witcher game, but I think that's a ways off yet. A little bit. That I'm actually excited for, but yeah. There's gonna be a Saw game. Saw Genesis. A new mafia game. Fucking expansion. RuneScape Dragon Wild Expansion. What the fuck? Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

That game hasn't died. They brought it back.

SPEAKER_04

That shit's still fucking a new virtual fighter game. Gundam Rogue Orbit. New gun a Gundam game.

SPEAKER_07

Killboars.

SPEAKER_04

I wonder what they're gonna raid teenage TMNT the last Ronin. I'm like, is that an M or is that a teen game? I don't know. It's gotta be M. If they don't do M, it's it's not what it needs to be. Daily Isolation 2. Cuphead's getting a sequel. Fuck them games. Fuck them, boy. I can't do shit. Nope. And you want to know how you bat how if you can suck if you suck at games or not, play Cuphead.

SPEAKER_06

Holy fuck. God, it makes you suck. Oh, fuck Cuphead.

SPEAKER_05

There's the one Dean's excited for. Resident Evil Veronica.

SPEAKER_06

Oh fuck. Yes, I creamed a little bit. I did. They dropped the code. Now everyone's gonna be confused. Who are we playing as this new bitch? Veronica?

SPEAKER_04

No. They dropped oh god. God, Capcom, you gotta stop letting your shit leak, man.

SPEAKER_06

It was leaked that. Oh, Cold Veronica's the next remake, and it won't by God, their shit leaks like crazy. So the Resident Evil 1 remake is gonna happen, apparently. Because Cap everyone has Capcom's fucking number for leaking their shit.

SPEAKER_04

You ever played a Yakuza game? Here and there. They're funny.

SPEAKER_05

This new one, Stranger Than Heaven, has the weirdest fucking cast.

SPEAKER_04

But it actually makes me want to play it.

SPEAKER_07

It has Tupac in it. Open one. Tupac and Snoop Dogg at that. Snoop Dogg. Nick was excited about that. Yeah, we got there is a lot of there's a lot of video game stuff.

SPEAKER_06

I just like how Xbox is barely a presence at half of these fucking things because they because they're done.

SPEAKER_04

They bought Bethesda and have done nothing with it since.

SPEAKER_06

Oh yeah, never. All the PlayStation nuts were worried about. Oh, we ain't gonna get to play Fallout and shit anymore. It's gonna be Xbox exclusive. And ain't we ain't had to worry about shit because ain't nothing happened anyway. And if they did make anything, they'd make it on PlayStation now because Xbox is pretty much computer, so now you don't even need it anyway.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Fuck off.

SPEAKER_03

You're never releasing that game.

SPEAKER_04

What? Kingdom Hearts 4. Probably not. Color Zero 6. Oh, that came up at Dave's! When you're eating, Wonder Eaton. Yeah, like yeah, like that's where is that? That's been in production. How many years? Untitled Iron Man game.

SPEAKER_06

Every hero's gonna get a fucking game now. Yeah, they can. You know what? They can't ever since that. Fucking f who made that failed ass Avengers game? Who made that failed motherfucker? Yay. Yay? Yes. That failed fucking game.

SPEAKER_04

That I that you can find on sale for like five bucks. That bitch is probably in the PlayStation Plus library for free. No, that's how bad it is. It's not even in there. God, what a disappointing game.

SPEAKER_02

It was delisted from digital stores in 2023.

SPEAKER_01

The Avengers game?

SPEAKER_07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

That's how bad that shit. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

So unless you owned it beforehand, you can't even really have it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

They're selling that bitch on Amazon? That bitch is so bad they're gonna be collector's items.

SPEAKER_04

I'm dead ass. And the other problem is when it came out. It came out in 2020. That is offensive that they're still trying to get 30 bucks for it. That's offensive.

SPEAKER_06

Does it come with all the DLC? I don't know. Probably not.

SPEAKER_00

Up Greek it up to free digital on PS5, but you said it don't exist anymore.

SPEAKER_04

So hold on, I'm curious. I'm gonna go to PlayStation Store now. Here we go. God, they've been some real stinker ass fucking games, man. Holy fuck.

SPEAKER_05

You know what the sad part about it is? Well, it came from one of my favorite studios.

SPEAKER_04

What? Square Onix. They're hit or miss. They can make some garbage. They can make some poop. Yeah. They can make poop.

SPEAKER_07

Oh, bulkka. So could doofy. Oh fuck. Smear my finger.

SPEAKER_04

The fucking Lego Avengers move games are better than fucking the Avengers game. Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03

It ain't there.

SPEAKER_04

It ain't on the PlayStation. I type in Avengers, I get Lego. All he gets Lego. It ain't there.

SPEAKER_03

You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_02

I have those games. I don't have all the DLC.

SPEAKER_04

It came up in the car.

SPEAKER_06

I think it was Nick that said, or Ryan. Those games are just underrated, but he don't like the control.

SPEAKER_04

That was Nick said that. It was a fucking beat-em-up game. People love the Lego games. Actually, no.

SPEAKER_02

One of my favorite beat-em-up Marvel games is heavily fucking criticized.

SPEAKER_07

And that's uh what? Oh, what the hell? It had to do with a fucking virus.

SPEAKER_04

Nemesis, Rise of the Imperfect? Yes. Yeah, that was weird. That game was weird.

SPEAKER_06

People didn't like it because they are like they were like making fucking original characters, putting in the Marvel universe in there and shit. People that made people rise. No, no, these are a Marvel character. We don't fucking want him.

SPEAKER_04

The weird shit people get pissed about. No, we don't want him. This guy's not or mad about that. That's how old I am. That was a PlayStation 2 fucking game. And it leaked that fucking um. What the fuck? Hold on. It's another thing.

SPEAKER_05

And if we can retain information and just spit it out when we want to recall it.

SPEAKER_04

No, is I can't. I play it in this game, so I can't help you. Oh my god. When did you become a gamer? I didn't. Sad. Godzilla, destroy all monsters melee remake leaked for Nintendo Switch 2. Yeah, that's that leak that they're remaking remastering that for Switch 2. Just Switch 2? Huh? For Nintendo Switch 2. Fuckers! Oh that one hurt my brain. I have it for GameCube. I probably still do somewhere. This may be the mo the oldest joke. Oh god.

SPEAKER_02

Oldest joke in history? Yes. Family guy is the one who has that. What? I can't recall stuff like that.

SPEAKER_04

So this is a Star Trek meme. Next generation.

SPEAKER_07

Captain.

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Wharf to Captain Bricard. Captain, we've been attacked by a bouncer from the planet Omega 3. Thankfully, the damage is only superficial.

SPEAKER_07

Omega 3s!

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Superficial? Superficial?

SPEAKER_07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

That one hurt. That one hurt to read.

SPEAKER_05

How many people that know that uh Omega 3s are fish oils?

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They do now!

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At least the ones who listen to us and have to take the vitamins. How old are our listeners?

SPEAKER_04

Sorry, Indonesia.

SPEAKER_06

Star Trek has a Magic the Gathering set coming out this year. That surprisingly Jay didn't have much interest in. I don't know what the fuck they were gonna do with it.

Cards Money And Nerd Debt Accounting

SPEAKER_06

I'd want the ships.

SPEAKER_03

No ships look internally archives.

SPEAKER_04

I mean they have artifacts now, so it's not gonna be that bad. I'm more confused at the Hobbit. I don't know how they're gonna have so many characters. I don't know how they're gonna have enough characters in the Hobbit to justify a set. I want smog. That's it. Hooray, you get the seven, you get all the dwarves and Bilbo. Jane's just gonna buy JJ.

SPEAKER_07

Oh god.

SPEAKER_04

He's not gonna be able to get smog. It's gonna be the rarest card in the set. I'll order that bitch. TCG! No, you won't. You won't even buy ours. Bam!

SPEAKER_06

That's like $150 worth of cards. I can't just do that.

SPEAKER_04

Which you had the money for. I will on Friday. Completely. I'm gonna have to go see Disclosure. I'm gonna have to go see Disclosure Day. Then I buy cards. It's the trade. I owe him money, so he just wants cards. And Ryan. You owe him money? Yeah. He doesn't pay me back for the draft.

unknown

Nope.

SPEAKER_02

For what, four years?

SPEAKER_06

So I'm just gonna buy him his cards. Same thing with Ryan. Ryan gave me a bunch of cards, so I have to get him his cards. So here you go, done. It ain't that hard. I don't have an accountant.

SPEAKER_04

Technically, he only owes he only he's only paying $50 more than what he had a month ago. That's the confusing part, by the way. That's the part I'm having biggest confusing by. You're only paying $50 more than he had were going to pay us a month ago.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Ryan's got the expensive cards that are a couple of like 40 bangers. Matt's aren't that bad. And I think Ryan's only more expensive because he wants the full art cards.

SPEAKER_04

Well, but the two that he wants, the two expensive ones are only available in full art.

SPEAKER_05

It's not always just because he wants to complete the set, right?

SPEAKER_04

No, apparently Matt said he does not. He just wants certain cards. He's just buying the Final Fantasy IX part of the set.

SPEAKER_05

Oh. Yeah, I nine? I completely failed. Nine? Okay, that's I completely failed.

SPEAKER_04

Okay. I'm just used to everyone loving seven, so whenever I hear a different one, I'm like, oh, nine? I don't have twelve. I've played twelve.

SPEAKER_02

It pissed me off. It hurt my shit.

SPEAKER_04

Huh?

SPEAKER_02

I got shit for characters when it came to 12 when I was collecting them.

SPEAKER_04

Oh. Ryan hurt my solo Final Fantasy because I told him, you know, I really love Final Fantasy. I love Lightning, Ryan. Oh, I hate Lightning. Oh. He's a big critic. I hate Lightning. Because I actually do like those games. I hate Lightning. Ryan's like, I hate Lightning.

SPEAKER_02

Unlike 10, 10-2, and what the fuck did they call three?

SPEAKER_03

They didn't even call it 10-3. They called it something else. They didn't make it 10-3. Did they? They didn't. It's X2X. It's 10 and 10 2.

SPEAKER_05

No, Lightning's the only one that got three games.

SPEAKER_02

But it was still a progressive story.

SPEAKER_06

Who was it when we were in the was it in the car? I think I might actually be. No, it was when we went the fucking free comic book day. I think Ryan, Ryan said though, I'd like, I see, I don't know.

SPEAKER_04

15 is the one with the car, right? Yes. You said I'd like that one. He's like, like that one. You like Noctus.

SPEAKER_06

You'd like that one. Ryan said that. Mr.

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Bros and has one of my favorite fucking songs.

SPEAKER_06

Jay's probably offended.

SPEAKER_00

He's like, oh, Dean, you can ask me about Final Fantasy.

SPEAKER_04

Damn it.

SPEAKER_06

Plakoon? I said Plocoon. Jay'd be like, Dean, you can ask me about Final Fantasy, Jay.

SPEAKER_00

At least how he's gonna go to fucking Ryan about God damn you.

SPEAKER_04

He's never gonna go to me for things.

SPEAKER_00

At least I know I can't say that on a podcast, damn it. At least what? At least I went to he who he who shall not be named about Final Fantasy.

SPEAKER_04

He's aware of the podcast. I'm just saying, that would have, that would have that would have just we've actually been talking.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, Levi Legend. Levi legend, there you go. But no, I remember back, I remember that would be like, because I remember you'd be like, Dean, talk to me about Final Fantasy. What'd you say? The new sci-fi of our universe.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my we do not speak in.

SPEAKER_01

I'm trying not to lead us back to hey, we're gonna do a Hogwarts episode.

SPEAKER_06

What the fuck? Be named. Matt said it died, and I don't think it's dead. I think it's just on life support over there. So that's season three. We've been promising that since fucking episode one. You know it would fucking die if every listener commented. Yeah, the only way it's gonna happen is if any of us actually cares to watch the HTO show.

SPEAKER_04

And to surprise no one, I'm not interested.

SPEAKER_06

So and to surprise no one, I'm not interested.

SPEAKER_04

I'll watch it. I'd say fall on the sword, but it's currently in pieces. I don't have HBO either. So sorry. I'm like king the HBO joke. King of the streamers. I do have way too many. I gotta rephrase that. You're king of the streaming services. It's the streaming services. He spends all of his time on Twitch. By definition. He's gonna die like Kaisina.

SPEAKER_06

I'm trying to I'm trying to remember what I'm trying to remember what me and Matt did for Last of Us season. Didn't I come over and watch it here and log in? Or no? I swear we watched it. Yes.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, we also have a missing episode.

SPEAKER_04

Speaking of which jump up you named. That was the Shazam episode, I believe. Shazam Greek dot or favorite dot the top 10 and last.

SPEAKER_05

We can redo that anytime.

SPEAKER_04

I'd rather redo our game show episode. No.

SPEAKER_06

No, no. I will not because my That was not our fucking fault.

SPEAKER_04

It was somebody's fault.

SPEAKER_06

I'm playing JJ. I can't, because my victory was set in stone.

SPEAKER_04

My dominant victory was set in stone. We gotta figure out. No, I have a way to do it. You do. We just haven't talked about doing it. I don't want to. I won't do it. My victory is already cheap. I will watch one.

SPEAKER_01

I'll see you come in second place. We haven't we haven't had the button pressed in a long ass time.

SPEAKER_04

They're probably batteries are blizzard, lizard, lizard, blizzard, blizzard No! Dominant victory is ruined because you didn't get your anime.

SPEAKER_06

You tried to cheat and you I did not cheat! Yes, you did! Just because I boarded out Gur and Logan just not cheat.

SPEAKER_00

I didn't get the point, did I?

SPEAKER_02

Hey Skeletor. When it comes to anime, you're Skeletor.

SPEAKER_04

I want them all? I want all the power? Yes. Okay. You will cheat to do it too. I have a way where we can do it again. I can't limit it as much as I as we did the last time.

SPEAKER_03

We definitely need to limit it.

SPEAKER_04

No, no, no, we can limit it in terms of quantity, but I can't limit it to the franchise like I did. Okay. I can we can limit the qu we can cut off at quantity at any point. How many did we try? I mean we had over a hundred. You're gonna make me open Spotify, it's still on there. No, you don't need to. I still have it. It wasn't so do I. It was like 99 or something. It was pretty a lot.

SPEAKER_06

Matt had a Matt took some issue with it though at the at a certain point because I did really start running away with it.

SPEAKER_04

And Matt's like, oh Jesus, he's really starting to just run away. Game troll. That's what I called it.

SPEAKER_05

Well, you know it's fucking massive when it's over four hours long. It's almost five hours of music.

SPEAKER_04

You know, it's yeah, it's massive. I was trying to get it, that's what he said in everything.

SPEAKER_05

No, you missed the opportunity because I already said music everything else.

SPEAKER_04

I have a way where we could do it if we really wanted to. And if we're gonna do it that way, I could play. I wanna and maybe ruin Dean.

SPEAKER_07

What the fuck? No.

SPEAKER_00

No.

SPEAKER_04

My music bringing may not be good, but I can but I can study and beat his ass. Yeah, just to take just to fuck with my like one of my crowning achievements. Just just so you know, Dean. What he could probably hit a button faster than you. What? I think he presses your buttons every time he talks to you. Oh, I took down a completely different way. Pressing buttons. Oh boy.

SPEAKER_02

Nipples don't count, Dean. Oh.

SPEAKER_04

I get under her skin right before the episode.

SPEAKER_06

JJ got broke. He got broke at some point. He broke on Kono Suba. It's like I'm done.

SPEAKER_04

Shady just stopped. He just completely stopped. He couldn't. You know, no, wait a minute. Nope. Nope. He's nope, wait a minute. He's gotta be available. Oh fuck. Damn it. That didn't no. What did we do last time? Damn it. What? Supergirl is a DC movie. I don't care. Ryan Guess. I don't care. I don't care. What? After today? I don't care. What do you mean don't care? Ask me in two weeks. Oh, okay. Okay. I he's the okay game. Okay. It took me a second to be like, huh?

SPEAKER_03

I'm confused. I don't care. He doesn't care about DC. No, he doesn't.

SPEAKER_04

He don't care. I mean, I don't. Oh, copyright! Copyright strike. Why it can't pick it up anyway. Oh god, it can't. Look. Yeah, it's that's picking up me. I don't understand that. It's ambient leaf.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah, that make that make sense.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, that's no It's just picking up me randomly talking. That is something. I just don't What the fuck are you doing? Stop it! Playing some of the songs. I know it's all girls, so it's messing with it. Like, what the fuck? Ryan fucking was like, what the fuck? I sense something. I sense a disturbance in the force.

SPEAKER_00

What are you no? I'm not doing this shit.

SPEAKER_02

My god. It's kind of weird actually. It didn't give me the full playlist, but it labeled how much was in it. I don't know if that's because you have to be logged in or what.

SPEAKER_07

No. Well, we won't need Spotify for the next edition, so. I worked. Oh I was What the fuck? I didn't.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, that looked like some trans video with video. Did you know I was from Atlanta?

SPEAKER_04

What the fuck? Oh no. So Ryan. Oh Dean, do we go off on our tangent now?

SPEAKER_06

Oh, the first four episodes of the Legend of Box Machina?

SPEAKER_04

Sure. Four. That's what happened. I didn't watch yet. I know you didn't.

Vox Machina Lore And Big Theories

SPEAKER_04

I liked it. That was all four. I don't know. Dean apparently got a bonus episode that I didn't see. Three.

SPEAKER_05

You allow the internet for that bonus episode. Maybe I have Mercer on speed dial.

SPEAKER_04

He gave me the hookup.

SPEAKER_06

You fucking wish. Let me get one of them fucking lines and just yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Let me tell him about Ballyon, man. Let me tell him.

SPEAKER_04

And I get invited to be a guest one. Ah, yeah. Oh fuck yeah. Matt wouldn't even watch the episode. I'll fuck yeah. I'll fuck yeah, alright. He wouldn't even watch the episode. No. My family on death. Definitely not. He wouldn't even watch it.

SPEAKER_05

We have another dragonborn on our episode. We don't have one right now.

SPEAKER_06

They ain't had one since the guy who got kicked. Yeah, nobody's played Dragonborn.

SPEAKER_04

Not since.

SPEAKER_06

Really? There was a guy that was cringy. I watched a story on it a few months ago. I forgot his name, but he played apparently. He was cheating and he was making all sorts of cringe comments to Laura and shit. Oh fuck.

SPEAKER_04

Oh fuck. He was a barbar uh dragonborn. Nobody said a dragonborn sense. Yep. What was his fucking name? Orion. O'Ryan? O'Rion Okaba was the person's name. Oh, do you want it the did you want the character's name?

SPEAKER_00

I uh Tiberius Storm.

SPEAKER_04

Tiberius, yeah. I knew it was something with a T. They actually gave him like an episode send-off or something because they kicked him off. Not really. They're like, get out of here. We're kicking you off. So Dean, do you have any immediate questions in regards to the get into the anime? Not really. I'm happy that Terrian Darrington is there. Mr. Wayne Ray.

SPEAKER_00

Yep.

SPEAKER_04

Still no word on who Andy Circus is playing. Nope. The running joke and running theory is probably Vecna or the whisper. That is, that is the that is the heavy rumor. I'm assuming that all of this cult is his cult, right? Yes. Okay. I put too to look at it. It's gotta be his cult. Do you know who the Necroninja is? Necroninja. Necroninja. I'm trying to the person that what that injured everybody in the final episode. Going full mountain on their ass.

SPEAKER_06

Going full mountain on their oh the the the bandaged up eye person?

SPEAKER_03

Yep.

SPEAKER_06

The kind the prop probably a chat.

SPEAKER_04

Let's go. Necroninjo. Any guess on who that is? No. Okay.

SPEAKER_07

So that's a that's important. Yeah. Okay. Very important.

SPEAKER_04

I know they came and fucked up Keeless whole fucking ceremony. Which is not canon. I can tell you out of everything shot 90% of it isn't canon. Oh boy. So they did not fuck up heeless. Oh they they retcon things into other things into what they needed. Oh god. To fit their scheme. To fit their scheme. I wonder about I wonder. Yeah, I thought she might be important because I was like, what the fuck? Son of a bitch.

SPEAKER_00

What the fuck? Hey there. Did y'all be singing a song? I know.

unknown

Hey there, Delilah.

SPEAKER_04

Delilah.

SPEAKER_06

I'm getting fucked up here. I'm trying to dig deep into my critical role stuff.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, you don't need to d dig deep in your critical role stuff, you need to dig deep in your legend of Oxmachina bag.

SPEAKER_07

Oh, you're gonna be so mad.

SPEAKER_04

Lila. Wait. Going back through the seasons here. Older season? Yes. Is that the album? You watched all of them. Briarwood? There you go. That okay, okay. Briar, yep, yep. She's still fucking No, she's dead. Oh.

unknown

Okay.

SPEAKER_04

But then she lived. But then she lived.

SPEAKER_03

Hey, that movie got announced too. I can make that joke.

SPEAKER_04

Somehow he's live. So guess who Big Beefy boy is that was fighting Grog? I was wondering who he was. He was kind of cool. The reality set in after he said it. So who is there?

SPEAKER_07

He was kind of cool. Oh fuck. It's not that hard. Not yet.

SPEAKER_04

You don't need a fluffer. He is playing with the pussycat. Oh shit. It was very cringy.

SPEAKER_03

It was. Come on, Dean. You can do it.

SPEAKER_04

Use 10% of your brain power.

SPEAKER_05

That's his whole brain.

SPEAKER_04

I was gonna say it. That's insulting. We know you don't think with your brain. That's true.

SPEAKER_01

Scientifically, we only use that much.

SPEAKER_05

The rest of it, it's all a lock.

SPEAKER_04

It's a lock because it's behind an EA paywall. I don't think it's that much of an insult to you because we know you don't think with it.

SPEAKER_05

Wrong brain, Dean.

SPEAKER_04

No, yours is an OnlyFans paywall. Oh god. You gotta pay as you go, bro. Come on, you can do it. I'm trying to think of important characters that have been fucking offed or something that have that they've had fights with. You have any idea how much this is breaking me? It's breaking him more.

SPEAKER_02

I'm telling you, it's breaking him more.

SPEAKER_04

It's hurting my soul. What's left of it? You got the soul. I've seen that guy before. Yes.

SPEAKER_03

Oh shit.

SPEAKER_04

Not in that form, but yes. Not in that form. Then what's gee? It's almost if if I said Delilah exists, who else gets to exist?

SPEAKER_07

The other Brian? Uh-huh. That's fing. Wow. Her husband? That's silence.

SPEAKER_04

Okay.

SPEAKER_02

It definitely wasn't a dragon reborn.

SPEAKER_06

No, well, you're I'm like, have I seen it? It wasn't, yeah, it wasn't that hard. Guess what? I was telling you it wasn't. You were trying to think too much. I put 'em. Yeah, because I put 'em, I put two. Oh, it's it. They'd look nothing like that's what I'm like, the Briarwoods? What the fuck? Did they actually come back in campaign?

SPEAKER_04

Yes! Oh my. Except this actually has magic that exists to the point of Well, the Star Wars, we can't really dictate what it is. Delilah can make simulacrums and clones.

SPEAKER_06

I don't know if that's what they're gonna use to justify her exist continued existence, but you know, I pre- I always think that they just they got fucking two, not at the same time, but they got two fucking critical role shows going. Mighty nine might drop before the end of the year. Last I heard it might.

SPEAKER_04

You get the cra You get the Kraken in episode two, right? That was episode two?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Jay, you get to look forward to that. I was like, eh, a kraken. Well, no, I'm trying to get my brain away from saying the joke, I'm a kraken you. Oh my god. I thought you're I mean, I'd make the obvious hentai joke, but no, we already made that earlier with the lighthouse. Oh god. How many more seasons does Vox have for their what? One more. After this one, currently they're almost done. Season four is gonna end on a losing note for them, and then they win to season five. Vecna's the final villain. Yes. Okay. The wisp.

SPEAKER_03

Well, I discussed that with you because of the titles.

SPEAKER_04

Yep. Okay. Well, it doesn't help that since I know the campaign, I get to notice all the foreshadowing that's happened in the episodes.

SPEAKER_01

It's like I don't know how I put shit together just from the titles, though.

SPEAKER_04

Oh no, Keila just said something that she shouldn't have said. Those are famous last words. Yeah, they're all gonna lose. They're ending on a losing note for season this season. Fect is gonna come in, kill what kill one or two of them, and this is how it's gonna go. Judging by the one title?

SPEAKER_02

The Bard's Lament.

SPEAKER_04

Bard's Lament is in the next three. That's my boy. See, it's gonna be very odd. He's gonna do the lamenting process and then maybe come back immediately. It's not gonna it's not gonna land the same as it did in the campaign.

SPEAKER_02

I think they're only doing it because we all wanted it.

SPEAKER_07

I know.

SPEAKER_04

It's much more impactful when it does it before the year off. And then and then does it come back?

SPEAKER_05

Well, I was I think very technically just not a part of the group right now, isn't he?

SPEAKER_04

No. He isn't in any of the three episodes.

SPEAKER_06

No, because I was surprised, but I had the loss. Oh, that's Wayne Brady. That's uh that's Scanlon's character, but Scanlon did not voice Terrian Darrington.

SPEAKER_04

That's fucking Sam's character. Yeah, that's wow. Weird. I was surprised. Normally they don't do that. But they're like, have Wayne Brady voice him. Everybody was really confused, uh, was really concerned and creeped out that Pike made out with Mr. Mercer. What? Gotta watch to find out, Jake. The best thing about named Mr. Mercer. Lord Mercer.

SPEAKER_02

Is it voiced by Mercer?

SPEAKER_04

Yes. Looks like Matt too. Pike made out with him. Yep. Drunk Pike make up makes out with him. Oh, drunk Pike. Yeah, for once Grog wasn't the one that was drunk. Oh. No, I just like how, well, no, Grog and Pike are the fucking buddies. But you didn't call them by their names. Oh, they're right. That's not their name. It's Spike and Greg. That's their names.

SPEAKER_06

Terry and Derek didn't call no one their names.

SPEAKER_04

The only person's name he bothers to remember is Priscilla von Wieselkopf. Yes.

SPEAKER_06

I'm like, you rem- I said that out loud in my room. You remember his name?

SPEAKER_04

Because he respects it. Everybody else is nicknamed. Little Elf Girl. Respect person. Little Elf Girl. Spike and Greg. Antlers. What do you call Hex? I can't remember what he called Hex. I don't remember. It was funny, though. Wings? Wings. It might have been wings. Might have been wings.

SPEAKER_06

You know, out of the whole, out of that cast, though, Matt kind of spoiled this for me because apparently he said it is sad and kind of tragic, but Vax has one of my most interesting. I'm in very interested in his story. Because he's got the crow, maiden, crow, raven crow, maiden, or whatever, fuck.

SPEAKER_04

Raven Queen.

SPEAKER_06

Raven Queen. Dang.

SPEAKER_03

Goddess you feel you could fuck.

SPEAKER_06

Well, I I got she don't want me as the fucking as her fucking thing. I mean, yeah. You're fucking good. You big as fuck, but I figure it out.

SPEAKER_04

You already tried to fuck my goddess. Yeah, the chair. Oh, he didn't fuck. That could mean you just see Valiant humping a chair in your fucking vision. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, he's probably humping your real life. What's the difference? Yeah. He heard everything. Legendary. Legendary moment. Heard. Didn't see. I didn't lose.

SPEAKER_06

That's one of Matt's most clutch moments. Is a DM right there.

SPEAKER_04

Alright. Who's in the room next to Dean?

SPEAKER_00

Jay.

SPEAKER_04

Me? Roll a see what roll uh see what you hear. One. You hear everything. I'm just glad you didn't play it out. One. I don't have a soundboard. No, I'm talking about him. Oh, no. He would have acted it out.

SPEAKER_06

Mom was upstairs, and I just didn't want. Oh god. She'd have probably she heard of me thinking she wouldn't have even been surprised. Because it's me. No. It's me.

SPEAKER_04

She's got you pegged in a square hole.

SPEAKER_01

Let's not talk about Ging getting pegged.

SPEAKER_04

No, no. None of that, no. That's gonna make me think of fucking this badge.

SPEAKER_05

I'm surprised it wouldn't be this one scene from scary movie.

SPEAKER_04

I thought it would have been that's where I thought it would have been.

SPEAKER_06

You gonna let me peg you? What? That was a good line. That was a good line. God, I'm so excited to have Vox Machina back. I remember what took me forever to watch that shit. And now I'm watching that shit before work.

unknown

Matt.

SPEAKER_04

Let me ask you a question. Every time you watch Vox Machina, do you hear a fire alarm go off? No. He should. See, no, I wouldn't make the joke too, is do his ears ring every time he watches. What is that? The funniest shit.

SPEAKER_00

Oh gosh. Oh god.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, what the fuck flavor was that? Sour. So I would. I just I don't know. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_06

It's gonna always it's always gonna be there. I I watched Reacher in like a weekend, all of that shit. Something else on Amazon you could fucking watch, but you know, fuck that, right?

SPEAKER_04

And you wouldn't live it down.

SPEAKER_06

You can't make the joke no more. I caught up. I caught up and at me.

SPEAKER_04

And I watch, well, I'm I'm almost a critter, literally. Oh, he's behind on that too. Damn it! You set it up. You walked right into it. I'm a couple of full behind. I get caught up. That'd be my tomorrow. That'd be my when I get home thing. Rob, we had another legendary moment, which I didn't tell you, which I didn't tell you what it actually was. No.

SPEAKER_06

You know what watching them watching them play critical role fucking does? I open my drawer and look at my dice like, yeah, that's he did the most Cadigan v Cadigan thing I've probably ever seen him try to do. All of them are at the all of them are all the people are at the table. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Which is an achievement in itself.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

All eleven of them. It's all the characters. Yeah, they're all back together. They're in the group they're in the regrouping phase of their of their arc before the next arc begins.

SPEAKER_02

No one died?

SPEAKER_04

Not yet. Well, technically somebody is dead. But they're undead.

SPEAKER_02

Or they did that.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, they're they're doing the Holo One thing.

SPEAKER_03

So the entire situation uh so Alex Octus is talking to Matt Julian, and the situation's getting tense, and Robbie just says, boy, things are getting tense, and he just cracks a beer.

SPEAKER_04

Everybody's like I love that guy. He is great. Let's in my top, he might be number one, but he's in my top two or three of favorite people I've went and met. He's up there. I've met him three times. He's up in my phone.

unknown

Huh?

SPEAKER_04

Oh, yeah, we're all together. What the fuck? I don't count the other ones. I never we never I never talked to us. He talked to us. Yeah. I got some science.

SPEAKER_01

That's the only problem. I don't think I have anything dedicated to him yet.

SPEAKER_04

It's okay, then you're gonna have to get have all next month to catch up anyway. Hmm? They're not on next month. Oh, they're on break again? Okay. They're doing going back to uh Daggerheart stuff.

SPEAKER_07

Okay.

SPEAKER_04

So Critical Rule will be on break for a month. Probably. Damn. Okay. I can't confirm that they haven't released the schedule for it yet, but they're scheduled to be doing the Dagger thing next month, so they're gonna be taking time off at some point. Like playing Daggerheart stuff, or just it's a continuation of a one-shot that they already did. Okay. With different characters. So it's not really a one-shot.

SPEAKER_07

It's just set in the same goal. Okay. Check the sequel.

SPEAKER_04

I'm still waiting.

SPEAKER_06

That might that could be. That might be a not 2026. That might be a 2027 adventure for me. It might. What? The next con that they're all at. That might be. I might. Chicago. It might be. They go to Chicago. I'd have to threat have to go. I highly doubt they'd come to Amkey. They when they were less big, they were here once.

SPEAKER_04

A bunch of them. No, most of them barely leave West Coast. Yeah. Robbie goes all over. Robbie's still doing Robbie still does a million cons. I don't know what the fuck's the difference with Robbie. He's just doing everything still. He has fun doing it, maybe. I don't know.

SPEAKER_06

Well, I don't doubt that they all have fun, though, but the problem is they their lines are like instantly capped at these cons, so it's a pain in the ass.

SPEAKER_02

I don't know if that means something.

SPEAKER_04

Well, yeah, we can't cap him.

SPEAKER_06

Oh god. That's on my list. I still I still did a cap no still talking to us. Pow. And I still debate who I'd have the best conversation with out of the critical role cast, excluding Robbie. Robbie's we'll talk to everybody. Robbie's just Robbie.

SPEAKER_04

Excluding Robbie. I can talk to Robbie forever. Hmm. You would probably have the most fun talking to Travis. Probably. Yeah, we have an issue with that one though. But you don't like Wisconsin, bro. I came from Wisconsin, bro, to see you, bro. You don't like the Packers?

SPEAKER_00

You don't like the Packers?

SPEAKER_04

I mean, he's a Cowers fan. Why would he? Laura, I can just talk about how much I love Jester, but she's probably used to that because everyone loves Jester. That's literally been said in the show. Just don't bring her a cupcake. Do. Or he prefers donuts. I know.

SPEAKER_05

Dean bringing a donut would be an issue.

SPEAKER_04

Dean bringing anyone.

SPEAKER_05

Why is this frosted, Dean? It wasn't before we got here.

SPEAKER_04

Not the joke I would have made, but sure. They all they all they all seem. They're all cool in their own way. Like, I've said I could probably go talk to Talison for an hour. Like, yeah. Matt has even said, yeah, probably. Talison's been through shit. That's why he's got a podcast with Ashley. Weird Kids. Ain't it called Weird Kids? I'd love to go see Ashley, but the only problem is that her natural speaking voice is Ellie. It's about Ellie. Ellie. I mean, most of them don't throw their voices for other things.

SPEAKER_02

We can go walk up there acting like a clicker.

SPEAKER_04

No. Oh god, I don't want to start chattering. Oh god. That'd be that'd be Liam signs probably a lot of Gara shit. I like asking who their most popular character is. That's one of my favorite things to do now. That's one of my favorite things. I don't know, because Liam also has Doctor Strange stuff. Yeah. Well, if you're anime, it's you're probably going in for Gara. Most likely. I mean, at this point they're all doing anime. At this point, anime is Mercer's a lot.

SPEAKER_06

Nah, Mercer get nah, Mercer get two. I'd go to Mercer for two. I'd go to Mercer for Yothero, my favorite Jojo in Jojo, and Law from One Piece.

SPEAKER_04

I forget he's Law in One Piece. Laura would be Jester, of course. And Chun Lee. That's a Chun Lee. She did Chunli for a long time. Surprised Blood Rain isn't on that list. Oh yes.

SPEAKER_07

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Oh yes. Oh god. Oh fuck. Travis. That's Ace for first and foremost. I'm probably Mustang, but Ace would be slightly above because I'm a one-piece guy. You could also get him to sign a Thor mini. This is true. This is This is true. This is true. And now everyone's gonna go for Sephiroth.

SPEAKER_06

Yep. We'll see. And he'll be his table will be next to Matt's. Matt, I'm signing Sephiroth stuff. I'm signed. Well, true they have the same setup.

SPEAKER_04

He's Matt's usually next to Laura, which is like I said though, the bullshit.

SPEAKER_06

You gotta buy VIP because I was talking to someone at last year at Amkey about that, and they're like, oh, why was that a con at one of the galaxy cons where they had Laura and a couple of critical role casts? You have to be right there, you gotta run to that line because. They cap it within like two minutes because everyone's out the fucking thing in their line. So you gotta be there. You gotta it's like a battle royal to get in that line.

SPEAKER_04

And I'm I'm game for that. I'm there. So we're getting there to the D four.

SPEAKER_05

Well, he could technically do that. I can't do that till next year.

SPEAKER_04

That's why I said next year, because Jay's tapped on vacation. Because of pneumonia. Tapped, yep, tapped me

Cons VIP Lines And Who To Meet

SPEAKER_04

a fucking week out of work. Use up all your vacation time. Ah, yeah. Just don't pay me. Fuck. He had one he had one day left. What the fuck happened to that one? Oh, no. Car. It started spurting oil. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Large puddle under the car. What the fuck is wrong with you? If if actually with the Burewick. If they're in Chicago. If they're in Chicago. Oh shit, he'd probably see it coming, though.

SPEAKER_06

That's the fucked up thing. If critical rolls in Chicago, we gotta drug him.

SPEAKER_04

We're gonna drug him. What?

SPEAKER_06

And take him.

SPEAKER_04

You lost me. I don't know if he'd go. So we have to force him to go. Why would I choose to go to Chicago? To see Matt Mercer, the legend. And get him to sign your picture. Yeah, that's never gonna happen. That is so not true. It's called a VIP ticket.

SPEAKER_03

So we're just gonna end up having to fill it out of his room. Get it signed.

SPEAKER_04

No, that's not the same. I would never do that to nobody. If you don't get you don't meet the person, it's not the same. That's not the same. You don't witness them sign it, it's not the same. So there's two people we have to kidnap to do shit. Well of course we gotta kidnap JJ. He don't do nothing. He lives, he's a hermit. He does nothing except go drink. Love him to death, but he's gotta. It's like and now he lives alone again. So he's not what he's doing right now. I'll guarantee you that's what he's probably fucking doing. What's his what's rounding thirds night for him running karaoke? Friday or Saturday night? Friday night.

SPEAKER_03

I wouldn't know the time ago that he's not there.

SPEAKER_04

Yesterday and today. Walk in there. Where the fuck is he? Gone. Or not there. Fucking shit. Oh my god. Where is so where would Mighty Nine be going in its second season? I I don't know where it'll end. Okay. They've ch they changed so much of it. Will I get my pirates yet? Or not yet. I damn. You shouldn't. Okay, you're like, but he can never. Will I get my pirates? They'd be on the seven C's. Like I said, I don't know what all they're doing because Molly has to die. Molly dies before you get to pirates.

SPEAKER_06

I know. He didn't die yet.

SPEAKER_04

I know.

SPEAKER_03

I probably threw you off a bit, didn't I?

SPEAKER_04

Well, he does, he wouldn't have died yet in the story.

SPEAKER_01

Oh.

SPEAKER_04

Still one of the most fucked up. He dies on a mission before the gentleman. They haven't really teamed up with the gentleman more than once yet.

SPEAKER_06

Still a fucked up thing, Matt told him. It's like, I'm like, man, Molly's one of my favorite characters in 99. He's gonna have to die. In anime, yes. You probably wouldn't you wouldn't like Molly as much in campaign.

SPEAKER_04

Your trend is happening. You're starting to like characters and they have to die.

SPEAKER_06

Oh you're the same thing noticed, huh? Uh-huh. Created the rule. I related to Molly. He's the he's the showman. He's pretty and he's Pikachu. What is the rule? Whoever relate to dies?

SPEAKER_04

Grog is chilling. He shouldn't relate to Vex. He's just starting to like him. What the? I love his story.

SPEAKER_06

He's got one, he's got one of the more compelling stories of fucking of the whole crew to me.

SPEAKER_04

Uh-huh. When I really think about it, I mean, Vex and Percy be chillin', they be doing a thing. And yo, Vex. Quite literally.

SPEAKER_06

No, no. Vex, she did it. She did Percy a little dirty. She went off the hunt instead of doing the bang boom.

SPEAKER_04

She had to. It's a little dirty there. Percy was like, oh. Instead of going to do the bang boom. You got to investigate his hole. Oh fucking shit. And he did.

SPEAKER_06

He's not wrong. He worded that perfectly. He's not wrong.

SPEAKER_04

Black hole underneath white stone.

SPEAKER_06

Okay.

SPEAKER_04

He gets to run tests on it.

SPEAKER_03

That's what he did. I'm not lying to you.

SPEAKER_05

That's how you phrased it that I have to do. Of course. I didn't watch the episode. Of course.

SPEAKER_01

God. Gets to investigate his hole. This guy gets super happy about how you phrased it. I'm going to automatically assume, okay, he didn't have sex, so now he's investigating his hole. Oh, he did that too.

SPEAKER_04

I've never. Oh god. He experienced the hole, then went to go investigate the hole. He got vagged. He does vax. Yeah, so it makes more sense.

SPEAKER_03

Somehow I yeah, I don't want to accept it either.

SPEAKER_04

The only one really not important is Grog. Except he's in for the raw stuff, but he's not in for the second. Except I just remember mine. That's a little bridge.

SPEAKER_00

My wife punches me during sex. My wife punches me during sex. But I didn't like it.

SPEAKER_04

Alright.

SPEAKER_00

Alright then.

SPEAKER_04

How do you want to sign us off? We're getting really long in the tooth. Long in the tooth? I don't even think we've been listening. Yeah, I don't even know if we've been yapping that long.

Final Jokes And Next Movie Plans

SPEAKER_04

We're hitting two hours.

SPEAKER_05

Well, remember, I could go over the entire lore, but it it's pointless if I don't have rhetoric.

SPEAKER_07

Battlecat. Well, I mean, I can talk to the battle cat. Battlecat.

SPEAKER_04

Okay. How is Battle Cat Battle Cat?

SPEAKER_07

I don't fucking know.

SPEAKER_04

He has the power. Yeah. Because he's probably connected to He-Man. Probably. Probably.

SPEAKER_02

I don't like that my brain just did that.

SPEAKER_04

He's connected to He-Man?

SPEAKER_02

He's connected to He-Man. What does He-Man do? He rides the cat.

SPEAKER_04

Yes, so there you go.

SPEAKER_02

He rides the pussy.

SPEAKER_04

He's holding a sword.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. We're done. Yeah, we are gone.

SPEAKER_06

All right, everyone.

SPEAKER_04

Have a good, safe night. The next time you'll hear from us is probably Supergirl. It's been poked before. What would the next one be? Supergirl? Yeah. Unless we did something for Toy Story, which I doubt. No. We may talk about it if we've all seen it, but other than that, yeah.

SPEAKER_06

It will be Supergirl.

SPEAKER_04

All right. Signing off.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Supergirl.

SPEAKER_03

Signing off, everyone.