Empowered by Hope
You want the best possible quality of life for your child regardless of diagnosis or prognosis. Raising a child with medical complexities is often lonely, scary and overwhelming. Join two parents of amazing children with rare medical complexities, Emily K. Whiting and Ashlyn Thompson, to get help and grow with them into empowered advocates for our kids. Here you’ll find a community of support, encouragement, education and resources, equipping you to navigate your child’s medical complexities with hope. To get more personal support, connect with us directly at www.ParentEmpowermentNetwork.org.
Empowered by Hope
Transforming Fear into Courage: Empowering Children Through Medical Procedures
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Finding it hard to imagine your child transforming their fear of medical appointments into proud moments of bravery? This episode of Empowered by Hope illuminates that journey through the inspiring story of Charlotte, Emily’s daughter, who recently earned a bravery award for her courage.
Navigating the complexities of medical procedures with your child is never easy, but preparation and self-care can make a world of difference. Ashlyn opens up about her own experiences with Emery, sharing pivotal moments that taught her the importance of being a calming presence. From the significance of clear communication with healthcare providers to the simple yet profound act of staying in the room during traumatic procedures, discover strategies that can help alleviate both your child's and your own anxiety during these challenging times.
Empowering children in medical settings is crucial, and proactive steps such as creating a "poke plan" can turn anxiety into confidence. Learn how involving child life specialists and practicing at home can transform a child’s experience, as illustrated by Ashlyn who made ultrasounds enjoyable for Emery, by incorporating her love for animals and superheroes. Celebrate the small victories and the strength that comes from supportive connections, and remember, you are not alone on this journey. Subscribe for more insights and share your own stories to help sustain this empowering community.
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Get your copy of She is Charlotte: A Mother’s Physical, Emotional, and Spiritual Journey with Her Child with Medical Complexities by Emily K Whiting on Amazon
Whether you've just been blindsided by your child's diagnosis or you've been in the trenches of their complex medical needs for a while, Empowered by Hope, is here for you, Though we wish you didn't know this heartache. We're so glad you found us so together we can walk this journey in hope.
Speaker 1:Hello everyone, welcome to the Empowered by Hope podcast. It's your co-hosts, ashlyn and Emily podcast. It's your co-hosts, ashlyn and Emily, and we're excited to be back with you today. And today's topic is one that came up very recently. We shared on our social.
Speaker 1:So Emily actually created this really great post because she had been going through a bunch of appointments with Charlotte, and the only reason I just paused because you're always going through a bunch of appointments with Charlotte, and the only reason I just paused because you're always going through a bunch of appointments but this was even more than normal. So so, yes, you guys were doing a marathon of appointments and, anyway, what you did was you shared this post that said to the parent whose child starts crying as soon as you pull into the children's hospital parking garage, screams, kicks and yells for blood draws, is afraid of an ultrasound, cries when asked to open their mouth, et cetera, et cetera. We're here to encourage you that it can and it does get better. And then you went on to share some really great tips and this and really cute and super awesome update that Charlotte received her bravery award for handling her tests like a dang pro, and we are so proud of Charlotte and so proud of you, emily, for helping her get there, but it was a heck of a road to get to that point and we had so many comments on this and a lot of interaction, a lot of people saying, oh my gosh, I dream of that day.
Speaker 1:So we thought you know what this is something we should talk about. We should really dive into this a little bit more and help everybody believe it really can and does get better. So before we do that, though, emily and I just need to take a quick minute. We're going to ask you to join us for a bit of a short mission moment celebration. Hopefully, by now you have had the chance to listen to two of our latest podcasts the one about bringing the Kelly procedure stateside to the US for the bladder extra fee community, and then the other podcast, which was about the incredible development with creating an actual focus population study, population for Hardikar syndrome and a new research paper that's extremely helpful for those children, those families being able to come from that because of hashtag heart, a car.
Speaker 2:You would have thought Right.
Speaker 1:Every time I'm thinking back to all the times I rolled my eyes at people saying hashtag this or hashtag that, and now I'm like hashtag heart, a car, baby Hashtag. There is power in the hashtag, exactly. I have new respect. But we just want to take a quick minute to say thank you to everybody who is sending in so much encouragement, so much support, all the love, and everybody who has prayed for Emily and I, our families, our daughters, this organization. I want you to realize that you helped make these things happen as well.
Speaker 1:Yes, emily and I have been the ones that have been the voice for these movements and we've done it together and we're thrilled and honored and feel so grateful to be following our God-given purposes or fulfilling those. But all of your prayers, all of your support literally are what helped us get there. We did not get to this point alone, and we have been talking to families the last two weeks from literally around the world who have been touched by this, and I already know a minimum of five families that have appointments scheduled to see if the Kelly procedure is the right move for their child. I heard from a mom two days ago telling me that the webinar that we hosted had her just crying tears of joy because she said I have been praying and praying to hear of something else that could help my son. And when I listened to your webinar, I realized my prayer was being answered.
Speaker 3:Oh my gosh, I have chills head to toe.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I do too, and I remember being that mom with Emery. That's exactly where I was two years ago, and to know that we are a part of just giving these families the support that they do need, that they deserve and helping their children their whole family, is really what it's all about is just beautiful. It is an honor and, emily, if you have anything else you want to add, I'm taking over the mission moment.
Speaker 3:I love it. I'm grinning ear to ear and nodding my head vehemently you can't see it but no, it's been an incredible journey. It's been three years in the making, or more, really, but just one of those where you know, just so grateful to all of you who have been a part of it. And I am convinced this is only the beginning of the massive impact that is Charlotte's Hope Foundation. And so you know, just buckle up, we're going on a ride, let's go.
Speaker 1:Right, exactly, and I'm going to be really bold here, and Emily and I might listen back to this and decide to cut this out of the podcast.
Speaker 3:So you shall see. I don't even know what you're going to say, but probably not.
Speaker 1:But I'm going to be bold. So, emily and I, this podcast is 100% for people who are navigating this journey. It is our number one goal and true focus is to support the families, the caregivers, the advocates and then their friends and surrounding support system. But in order to do this, emily and I are two moms who we have dedicated ourselves to doing this. We don't get paid for doing Charlotte's Hope Foundation, but our families we put a ton into this let's Hope Foundation. But our families we put a ton into this and it is overwhelming what we've been able to accomplish.
Speaker 1:And, like I said, we didn't do this alone. But in order to keep doing this, we do need the support. So if you know of any, whether it's an organization or a business or business owner or just somebody who you think would be really passionate about, you know, getting behind what we're doing here, because we're just getting started then please feel free to share our information with them. If they want to reach out. We could use the support you know financially uh, there's other ways that people can help, but we just we want to keep going. We don't want to go anywhere, but it's a lot to do for two moms doing it.
Speaker 1:We're doing our best and God just keeps showing up for us, but I'm going to be bold and ask for help. So if you know of anybody who you think would like to even $5 instead of a coffee, you'd be amazed. Every dollar helps. Coffee, you'd be amazed. Every dollar helps. And we want to pave the way for as many families as God will allow us to.
Speaker 3:So thank you so much for your help. I'm going to piggyback on that really quick, because we just launched a peer-to-peer campaign where those of you who are listening and it's such a perfect program for our audience because you have your own family network, support system, friends, and so this peer-to-peer campaign makes it so easy for you to be able to make your own fundraising for Charlotte's Hope Foundation. It doesn't cost you a penny, but you can create your own little campaign and we've like set up a page where you literally just click a few buttons, fill in some info, launch it, promote it to your people, and so we'll put that in our show notes and make sure that you have access to that. I think it's on our website, right, if you go to.
Speaker 1:Yes, if you go to donate, then it will take you to our Donately page and then it will show you that there is an option to create your own fundraiser.
Speaker 1:And and then it will show you that there is an option to create your own fundraiser, and it's really cool. Thank you for bringing that up, Emily, Because you know, if you are a family who has a child with medical needs, you can literally just share your story and talk about. You know why having this type of support matters and is important and why people need access to you, know to what Charlotte's Hope Foundation is providing and it's really easy and it's a cool way to let people know what's going on with your life and provide an update and also, hopefully, just let more families know that we're out there.
Speaker 3:You know what too? I think what got me really excited about this idea when we got it rolling is how many parents do we hear say I just want to help other parents who are going through similar things? And that's what started this whole thing. Was you and I wanting to help other parents? And so this is a way you know, not everybody's going to go out and start a nonprofit but if you want to be able to support what we're doing and be a part of it, this is a great way to be able to do it and it not be a huge time, consuming project or undertaking or volunteer work. It's just literally filling out some information about your story and then sharing it with your network, so I hope you'll take advantage of that. It's really exciting and, man, we're only just beginning. I can't wait to see what happens in the next three years and the next after that.
Speaker 1:I know, right, exactly. I'm excited about the next three months. I know, yeah, all right.
Speaker 3:So what do you say? Should we be?
Speaker 1:ready to jump into the trauma of testing. Well, that's exciting.
Speaker 3:Yes.
Speaker 1:Yes, it's a big jump.
Speaker 3:You can relate so well too, because I know Emery has had her own journey with ultrasounds, blood draws, you name it, all the things and some of the. Here's the thing. You know it's really challenging with our little children and probably our older children too. I don't know, I'm not there yet. So those of you with older children, you weigh in please. These are scary tests, scary invasive surgeries. Even just checkups can be scary. So going through the actual medical challenges for your child is one thing, but then it's all the mental and emotional turmoil of not only your own anxiety for them but your child's too, and they feed off each other right. And so I literally remember when Charlotte was a few months old, every time I'd pull into the parking lot for our or the parking garage for our children's hospital, she would just start sobbing. And I remember telling people I think she knows we're at the hospital, she knows, and like we'd get into the elevator and she'd scream bloody murder and my heart would just shatter Cause I'm like we haven't even done anything yet and she's already freaking out. And people. You know some people would be like, oh, she's too young, you know, she's probably just upset about something, and others would be like. It might be right, I don't know. I was definitely right. I say that with all humility and also no humility at all. Yeah, so anyway, and, like you know, I just remember our hearing tests were so traumatic and I mean, you know the vision tests and there's just so many things that are invasive and not typical for little little kids or any kids at all. And so we're here to tell you it does get better and there's a few tips and tricks to help you get there, but also that it's not an overnight thing. It's learning together how to navigate all these things, how to channel the anxiety because it's going to be there what to do with it for both you and your child, and who to go to for help.
Speaker 3:Charlotte is six, and what spurred this post that ended up getting so much traction last week was we had three days of appointments and tests and I don't even know how many appointments and tests there were. It was from sunup to sundown, intense, and in the middle of it we're trying to do school and daily medical treatment and all the things. But she ended up doing a CT scan without anesthesia and many adults can't do that. But we were all really eager for her to be able to do a test without anesthesia, because you all know, at this point I don't know she's probably had 30 or 40 rounds and she's six years old. So you know, if we can limit it, let's do it. And she earned a bravery certificate from child life and by golly she has had that certificate in her book bag, she has taken it to her class, she has presented it and gotten collapse and she is just so darn proud of it.
Speaker 3:We said we were going to frame it, so I got to find a frame. So our point is we're going to talk about three things. One is to just keep showing up for your kid, and we'll talk about what that actually means. But half the battle or more is to just keep showing up with your kid and for your kid. And then the second point is that child life. We're going to talk a little bit about that and we'll reference back to some previous episodes that we have that are phenomenal about child life. And then our third point is that it does get better. Hold on, mom and dad, hang on, it will get better. It might take a while, but it will get better. So should we dive into point number one Keep showing up.
Speaker 1:I definitely think we should. So Emily and I were talking about this yesterday and we've had a lot of conversations about how, while the testing is so hard for our children, while the testing is so hard for our children I think the part that's hardest for us is our anxiety can really take over during those moments. Then you feel out of control, you feel helpless. I know at times I felt downright mean. I feel like I'm being a bad parent forcing my child to go through this, but knowing she needed it. And what's funny is Emery had an ultrasound recently and we were talking about the results with our pediatrician a couple of days later and she said it's just incredible how far you all have come. She said think about the version of yourself you were the first time Emory ever had an ultrasound and think about where you are now, how you handle it.
Speaker 1:And I actually spent some time thinking about that and I was like you're right.
Speaker 1:I felt really prepared and calm and I felt like I had my toolkit for if Emory started to get anxious and you know, it has gotten easier and therefore I have been able to help it get easier for Emory, even when it's so hard and uncomfortable. I realized, wow, my reactions to the hard and scary things are actually getting better, and for a while they were not like that. I would you know. Everything kind of felt like a trigger, like, oh my gosh, we're back to things being really bad, really scary, really hard and deep breathing is a really good exercise for many reasons, and probably the biggest thing that I have learned on the journey is that the best thing I could do to help Emory is to make sure I'm taking care of myself in these appointments, that I've got a hold on what I need to feel strong, to feel as calm as I can and then she feeds off of that from me and I can be the support system that I want for her, and then it's just a better experience for both of us.
Speaker 3:And I think a common denominator of what both the child needs and the parent is to know what to expect. And so you know what I've come to learn many times providers, let's say they're a phlebotomist, right, and they're in the lab and they do the blood draws. This is what they do every day, all day. So they might just put the tourniquet on, use the alcohol and start going at it. And I have learned to press the pause button and like in this example, and say, hey, will you walk us through every step of what you're going to do before you do it here? Here's Charlotte's doll. Will you do it on the doll? Show her, can you do it on me? Pretend, obviously, preferably, right, yeah, preferably. And then, okay, once you know what to expect and this is why we say and we'll get to point number three, but we're probably going to say it a million times in the process it does get better because you learn what to expect. The more you do it right and the more you know what to expect, the more you can prepare and the more you can figure out where are areas that you can impact your child's sense of control or or whatever. And so, keeping in mind that both for you and for your child, it's very helpful to know what to expect as best as you can. I have found that sometimes learning what to expect it's really hard to get answers, like trying to figure out what to expect post-op Well, sometimes that's impossible to really figure out because a lot of times the providers might not really know. We have a whole nother episode on that and, like we already actually recorded it, I don't remember what number it was, but I was very fiery during it. Anyway, you know I'm losing my train of thought, but the point is, if you can try to figure out what to expect, that helps a lot with the feeling of anxiety and the worry. The other thing, and one example that just came to mind as we started to talk about this showing up for our kids thing. It's literally an example of showing up for our kids.
Speaker 3:I remember when we were in the NICU and Charlotte was getting blood draws daily and she would scream bloody murder and it broke my heart and I couldn't take it. I felt like she would stare into my soul and beg me why are you letting this happen? That's what it felt like she was doing in this tiny little five pound body Right, and so I decided to make sure that she didn't equate me with pain, that I was going to leave the room every time something traumatic happened. So I started doing that.
Speaker 3:I did it for like three months and then when we were outpatient, I was talking to an occupational therapist about this, because I was talking about how hard blood draws are and now it's getting really hard being outpatient. I can't leave the room so much. And she was like okay, emily, you have two options. You can either leave the room in the hopes that she doesn't associate your hands with pain, but also knowing she's probably associating that with feeling abandoned in her hardest times, or you can stay right beside her and she's most likely not going to associate your hands with pain, but she's going to associate you as safety, like you are here for her in the midst of the hard and it's kind of laughable now because I am her safety blanket to the max. My husband always laughs.
Speaker 3:Oh my gosh, he's like the umbilical cord never got cut. And it is so true, because after I had that talk with the OT, it was such a like mind altering shift in my brain of like, oh, I don't, I have to show up for my daughter, I have to be there in the hard, I have to show up for my daughter, I have to be there in the hard. And half of that battle is literally just staying in the room when things are hard, just stay and then learning. What is it that you can do to be that safety net, even in the midst of the hard? Right, there's a lot of like safety holds you can do where you can say, okay, I'm going to hold you firm and tight with love, right, there's a lot of like safety holds you can do where you can say, okay, I'm going to hold you firm and tight with love, right, versus having, like, the nurse come in and pin them down, right, I think we call those when we had our child life specialist on Kim Flood from Bridge to Bravery.
Speaker 1:I think those are called comfort holds and you can research those. There's all kinds of videos that show what those look like, you know. I know a common one that we do now is chest to chest, so where Emery sits on my lap and her stomach is to my stomach. Her legs are wrapped around me and you know she can bury her head if she wants to or somebody can hold a phone for her, but she tends to like that position a lot better for like her kidney ultrasounds, a lot better than she does laying down.
Speaker 3:Yes, charlotte, same for IV, or, yeah, ivs and for blood draws. She wants to face me, which usually phlebotomists do not like because it's harder to prick, but I'm like, if you want her to hold, still, this is how it's going to have to be. So we get in some really weird positions, but it works. The other thing that I learned early on if you feel that you really won't be able to keep your anxiety at bay about your child's reaction or anxiety, sometimes having someone you know and trust and your child knows and trust go with them and for you to stay back is the right choice. And I know that counteracts what I just said of keep showing up. But you know like there's been a couple examples.
Speaker 3:So sleep studies oh my gosh, sleep studies We've had like four, and they are horrible. Horrible with little kids. We've had like four, and they are horrible, horrible with little kids. And she, like part of it, is I am the security blanket, so sometimes her reaction is bigger when I'm there and so for things like that we learned by study for dad's going, mom's not going, and it's not because I don't want to be there for her, it's because my presence makes it worse, and so you know, in some cases it's, you know, not not all, but in some cases it makes a lot of sense to send dad, grandma, you know, a trusted friend, whomever that is going to be able to be a little more calm in the situation until you feel that you can also be calm in this situation.
Speaker 1:That's a really good point and I think let's segue into if you are another thing to do, if you are really struggling with staying in the room and let's say you don't have another family member or a friend who can join you, or even if you do, please, please, please, look into child life specialists within your network, because they are the heroes of pediatric today, in my opinion.
Speaker 3:They're amazing.
Speaker 1:I don't know how we survived without them in the past.
Speaker 3:No, no they're so amazing. So child life if anybody doesn't know who they are, what they do, and sorry, this is not going to be a technical definition, but bottom line is they help the family and the child to, through play, navigate what can be really challenging and traumatic medical intervention and help normalize it. And they're really good at thinking about things from the perspective of the child and the family to help them have. For instance, we built with Bridge to Bravery, which is Kim Flood's business. She's a child life specialist.
Speaker 3:We created a poke plan that's what I call it anyway. It's for when we get IVs and we get blood draws. What's the plan? And it's brilliant because it breaks down for each step. What is it that Charlotte wants to do? How does she want to be held? Does she want to count down from three, two, one and then have the doctor say poke, or does she just want it to happen when she's not looking? Does she want a show or does she not? Does she want to blow a pinwheel or not? Does she want the frozen spray, All those things? And so it gives so much control to the child in a situation that really feels out of control, and it also gives a lot of control to the parent because it's like, okay, now I know the plan, I don't have to just wrestle my kid and hold him down and hope for the best.
Speaker 3:Now, granted, that's for an older child, but child life specialists are relevant for any and all ages because they're going to think about things from the child's perspective and the parents. For instance, this is in my book. She is Charlotte a really bad example of just a traumatic test. I bet if a child life specialist was involved when we were in the NICU, they would have advised me not to go to one of the tests that we did. I went to and ended up literally having to hold Charlotte down for an hour. It was the worst thing ever and I bet if child life had been involved that whole thing would have gone way different. They are phenomenal. Anytime you don't get offered child life, I encourage you to ask.
Speaker 1:And if you have a child, let's say that you're listening to this and you're one of the people who's in that position of your child is freaking out before appointments, when you're driving, when they hear the word doctor. Highly recommend reaching out to child life specialists ahead of your appointment as well, because that's been one of the biggest wins that we've had with Emory is, by working with Kim ahead of any appointments, we've been able to do play practice at home. We even went so far as to I was able to because of my husband's job connections I was able to borrow a ultrasound probe, one that wasn't being used, and bring it home. And we practice doing ultrasounds on dolls, on stuffed animals, and then then we started doing them on her brother, on me, and then eventually then she would let us do them on her. So then she became so much more comfortable with it, and so when we had that next ultrasound she was great with the probe. But then I realized the step I had missed was the jelly. So she was like I do not like the jelly. So that was our only freak out point.
Speaker 1:So then when we had our latest ultrasound, that all came about because we had been watching the secrets behind the zoo on the Disney platform and so many of the episodes show vets performing ultrasounds on animals who are pregnant. And Emery is a typical little girl who is baby obsessed and she loved those. And she actually said, mom, can I get an ultrasound? I want to look for baby animals in my tummy. And I said you know what? We sure can, because I had been putting off her ultrasound, she hadn't had one within the six month timeframe that she was. We'll just say it was suggested that she was. We'll just say it was suggested. It wasn't like critical, but it was something we needed to get done. And so when we went to the appointment, I told the technician, I said so we are here today to look for baby animals inside of Emery's tummy. So when you're scanning, if you could please point out to us the baby animals you are seeing that would be fantastic and thankfully I could tell.
Speaker 1:For a second. The technician was like did I look at her paperwork, right? Like what are we looking for? And then she's like you know what? You got it? Yes, absolutely. So we found you know three or four different animals and we were really good.
Speaker 1:And then, when we got to her kidneys, emory started to get kind of anxious, because she always I don't know why she gets more nervous. I think because they're behind her. She can't see easily. So they start doing her back and the gal, the technician, turned on the colors to be able to see Flo, and they were red and blue. And all of a sudden Emery goes from being like I don't want this, I don't want this too.
Speaker 1:Look, mommy, spidey's in my tummy. I've got Spidey in there, the red and blue. And I was like, oh my gosh, you're right, I had no idea Spidey could get in there. Do you think there's other superheroes? And our technician was was just amazing. And she turned on a different colorway and it was green and purple. And so then she was excited because her brother was like it's the Hulk. The Hulk is inside your tummy. Oh my gosh, it was just you know. So I just share this story one because now, if you're having an ultrasound, you have a kid who's nervous, I recommend looking for you know things that are not actually in there, just making a game of it. Or if you have a kid who really likes animals, watch some ultrasounds, watch some tests being done on animals, and let them get excited about that.
Speaker 3:I love that and I think that's such a good story. It's amazing because I remember you telling me how hard ultrasounds were and then to see how fun it became. And what's really cool is following your child's lead of what interests them, Because some kids might freak out if you tell them there's a baby giraffe in their belly. They might like be literal about it, right, and some kids are going to think it's the most fun adventure ever. So you know, I think the biggest thing is tuning into what gets your kid excited. Like for Charlotte. She wants to be a mom. So bad I mean shocker, that's all she's seen is me being pregnant. So every time we get her an ultrasound we're looking for her baby like literal, true human baby. But some kids that would freak out, Right. So, yeah, I think the biggest thing and I've learned this the hard way where I've tried to get something to work for Charlotte and it just totally freaks her out, Like one time we were trying to get used to I don't even remember why, cause she has hearing loss, and we were trying to get used to headphones for some reason and we put them on her.
Speaker 3:Oh, I think because, um, because we were trying to prep her for audiology testing, because they put headphones on and speak to her through the headphones, and so we were trying to prepare her for that and she was really scared of the headphones. So so, as you guys can see, it's not always invasive things that are the hardest right, it's not always the blood draws and the surgery, Sometimes it's the headphones, it's the jelly, whatever. So I remember we put those headphones on her at home and we were practicing and I would go silent but move my mouth as if I was talking, just like goofing around, like you know, you can't hear me now. And she lost it and I couldn't figure out why. I was like what? I don't understand, why these headphones are, you know, like are freaking her out.
Speaker 3:And our OT, the same one that was so wise, that told me like you're, you're kind of teaching her, you abandon her. She said it very lovingly, though. Anyway, she was like Emily, you're teaching her that when she has headphones on, she can't hear anything and that's freaking her out because she already has hearing loss. And I was like, oh right, Okay. So then we started putting headphones on and talking really loud. But here's the other kicker to take away from this If this is freaking you out of, like I'm going to do something wrong and make my kids scared. The beautiful thing about kids they forgive fast and they relearn when you reroute really quick. So if you try one thing and it's total epic fail, that's fine, because now you've learned that doesn't work. Try something else.
Speaker 1:Exactly, it is constant learning for you and your child. So, once again, one of our favorite words grace.
Speaker 1:Not only are you giving your child grace, but remember to be giving yourself grace and also to be okay, sometimes just throwing logic out the window, because your kid is going to react to things and you are going to say this makes absolutely no sense why my child is freaking out about somebody moving the pulse ox tape, but yet she was fine when they were cleaning her incision. This doesn't make any sense, but it doesn't have to. It bothered her, it upset her, and so that's what she needed help with. Yeah, so true, and that's okay. So yeah, so don't let logic bog you down. That can be kind of challenging, but I think we've probably covered a few good pointers for how to handle these Plenty.
Speaker 2:We should just I don't know, emily.
Speaker 1:I think we should probably covered a few good pointers for how to handle these, and I think we should. Just I don't know, emily. I think we should probably just round this out with. The only thing that you really have to do above all else is just be there for your child. Take it one test, one step, one doctor's appointment at a time and if you need help, it's okay, ask for help. You're doing it for your child.
Speaker 1:There are people who literally have full-time careers in this because the need is that great and it's understood that it is a huge part of this journey. So I cannot recommend enough researching child life specialists. I mean, there's a bunch of them that have great videos, reels that they make, tiktoks that they make just showing really excellent tips and tricks and, depending on your child's age, you can follow what works for your kid where you are right now. But there is help out there and we know it is so hard. It is so, so hard seeing your child hurt or be scared or both at the same time. But you're not doing it alone, you don't have to and you're doing a much better job than you probably think you are you probably think you are.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and I think I'm going to close this episode with a final point that we didn't say in our outline and that's okay. It is to celebrate the wins, even if they are small. Celebrate them big time. And, like an example, we got the bravery certificate for the CT scan. Well, that was a huge win, that was massive. But if you get much smaller, you, that was massive. But if you get like, but much smaller, you know, you, my brave child, let the phlebotomist spray you with the frozen spray, even if she threw a fit and, like, punched you when they tried to actually stick the needle. But you can be like, you were so brave that you let them put that frozen spray on. You know, to celebrate each little win is massive and to help them remember you are brave and you are capable and I'm here with you. Me and Charlotte say that all the time you are brave, you are capable and I'm right, here with you. And then my husband's like, and the umbilical cord is getting stronger.
Speaker 3:But anyway, celebrate those wins, people, and just keep on keeping on, it does get better. We're here with you.
Speaker 2:You are capable, you are equipped and you are not alone. Together, we can do hard things for our children. If this episode connected with you and you want to hear more, be sure to hit the subscribe button. We would also love to learn about your personal journey and how we can support you. Reach out to us at contact at charlotteshopefoundationorg. And, last but not least, if you know of someone who could benefit from this podcast, please share when hope is buried.
