Busy Moms | Christmas Preparations & Rediscovering the True Meaning of Christmas with ANDREA LENDE

Are you a mom overwhelmed by the demands of the festive season? Wondering how to balance the hustle and bustle of Christmas while still preserving its sacred essence? Our guest, Andrea Lende, author of "It's a Wrap," sheds light on this very dilemma. We delve into the heart of Christmas, exploring ways to incorporate moments of faith and reverence amidst wrapping gifts and preparing Yuletide feasts. Andrea's insights, drawn from her book - a unique devotional designed for moms - offer guidance on creating memorable family moments during this special season. 

Beyond the general flurry of the holiday season, we reflect on the magic and wonder of Christmas, reminding ourselves to savor the small miracles that unfold. Revisiting Zechariah's encounter with the angel Gabriel, we're reminded of the divine origins of this holiday. I recollect a treasured Christmas memory, highlighting that sometimes less can be more. Furthermore, we explore the incredible gift of introducing our children to the Word of God, discussing various ways to do so. Join us in this enlightening conversation, and let's make this Christmas one that's infused with faith, reverence, and heartfelt moments.


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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

starts with Zechariah and the angel Gabriel coming to him in a space. We read about him going into the holy of holies and doing his job and do you know how many times he would have had to tend to the altars and the incense and all those things and it would have become very routine for him. This would have been something that he would do all the time and maybe he was tired, like moms are tired or we get up into our morning routine and fix the breakfast and the lunches and pack them and try and get everybody out the door and all those things. But on that one day he was involved in a miracle. It was a miracle day for him where the angel Gabriel came and said you are going to have a son and his name will be called John. Well, the goal to me even now is in the routine of the day. How can we experience that miracle morning? You know, every morning.

Speaker 2: 1:10

Hi, I'm Ruth Hubsap Kim. Welcome to the Out of the Darkness podcast, where we help you navigate life's trials based on faith and biblical truths. Today, my guest is Andrea Lendi, and we are talking about Christmas and preparing for it. How does a mom who is overwhelmed with wrapping gifts and buying gifts and preparing all the food take time for herself to slow down and remember what the real reason is for the season? We are talking about all that and more. Hello, andrea, I'm so glad that you are here and you've joined me on Out of the Darkness. Welcome.

Speaker 1: 1:54

Thank you, Ruth. Thank you so much for having me on today.

Speaker 2: 1:58

For the first time you are in my backyard and we're playing together. Usually I am on your Facebook Lives or your street, can't even speak. That's stream yard recordings.

Speaker 1: 2:15

This is not going.

Speaker 2: 2:18

Anyway, you are in my backyard and we are going to be talking about Christmas and how it's just around the corner and how we prepare for Christmas and what Christmas really means to us as moms, what it is that we have to remember during the Christmas holidays and the month of December, because I think sometimes we drive ourselves nuts.

Speaker 1: 2:48

For sure. There are so many things to do.

Speaker 2: 2:51

I know, but I want to introduce your book right out of the gate. People know that we're referring to your. You have this amazing book. It's called it's a Wrap and it's a devotional for moms. I think it's great, I love. I have to be honest and say I like the title very much. It's a wrap because I think most parents and most mothers by the end of Christmas or the holiday season, it's wrap, it's done, we're done, we're toast. I know you have a large family. I think that it takes a lot more energy. I only had three, but it was sometimes it was a lot.

Speaker 1: 3:42

That's what I have. I have three boys.

Speaker 2: 3:46

It takes a lot of energy. I think to I don't know to prepare for the holidays. What got you or what made you think that you needed to write something to put out there for mothers?

Speaker 1: 4:03

Part of it is because I needed something, I think. Well, I don't think. I know that over the busy season, the hustle and bustle, all the things we have to do on top of all the things we already do, can leave me like the Grinch totally. I don't want to be that way. I want it to be this reverent holy season and time for my children. I have wanted that since they were little. We do that. The ambiance with just having all the lights off and the Christmas tree lights on and above the mantle and those lights twinkling and everywhere we can possibly put lights, we put lights. We try and make it just a really special season.

Speaker 1: 4:52

But as a mom, we can be, like you were saying, absolutely exhausted from day to day with the celebrations and the school programs and the buying and the wrapping. I'm not the person who buys all year long. I know that there are a lot of people who are and my hat is off to you, but I think even if you have pre-purchased everything, it's still a lot. I wanted something to take, particularly as a mom of young children.

Speaker 1: 5:27

I often didn't take the time to read the Christmas story and didn't hear it until Christmas Eve at church, thoroughly exhausted and could hardly even enjoy it. So the theme really in this book is telling just the Christmas story a wee bit in Luke 1 and the rest of Luke 2, to help people, help women, remember that story, that Christmas story, and why we celebrate Christ's birth, why this whole busy season even happens. And did that inside of the book along with some of my stories of past Christmases to give perspective. Today may not be the perfect day to do all the extra things, but how can we go into today, every day throughout December with that reverent attitude and the celebration of Christ's birth? What about just one fleeting moment on Christmas morning?

Speaker 2: 6:28

Not imagine you as the Grinch. That's not an image that comes to mind when I think of you. Andrea, you know I think you touched on a couple of points that are really important and I want to start off with. You know how we as mothers because you know the dads in the home every family is different, obviously, and everybody's roles in the family are a little bit different, you know. So you know, let's take the average home where mom does the cooking, mom may do all the shopping, all the gift wrapping and trying to keep keep certain traditions going. I think that there is this expectations when we are young.

Speaker 2: 7:16

I know that I did things a lot differently 30 plus years ago when my first daughter was born that I do today. I think my priorities got shifted. Initially, my priorities were to prove that everything could be done by a mom and as a single mom. Maybe that was a little bit more of in my mind than anything else, but I decked out the house. I tried to get, you know, swags of you know, like a garland across every door and every room had some type of decoration. I mean, it's an 1100 square foot home, so it's not a huge place, but you know it's enough when you have three kids running around and to me that was it. You know, making the handmade crafts with the kids stringing popcorn in Cranberry because in my mind I had this perfect television home perspective of what my home should look like at Christmas. And I did it. And when the kids were little it was fun. But as they got older and I started to work, it got really difficult and I felt myself sort of resenting the fact that I was doing everything and I wasn't able to enjoy everything.

Speaker 2: 8:50

And I think I've come to a place where I've kind of met that happy medium. First of all, I think I'm in so much of a better place spiritually. So for me I've come to understand what the true meaning of Christmas is, and that has changed my perspective of Christmas. I still look forward to it because it is the beginning of this awesome gift that was given to us, you know, through Christ's birth. And then it's a time for my children to come home. I know that this year has been an amazing year for you, with your boys heading out in all directions. So that feeling of coming home when my children are all together and they digress and become like toddlers, yes, I love it, I love it. I love the chaos. Adult chaos, right Like children, but I think that this is what it took time for me to understand that we don't need everything we don't. You know, simpler sometimes is better. So how do you see yourself this Christmas with your boys? I hope they're all coming home, are they?

Speaker 1: 10:11

I hope so. Yeah, I hope to get to see all of them and, as you said, they become toddlers again and that's my hope that they walk in and it's like a it is. I do like to decorate, but I've done it more. I guess you learn over the years to do it a little more simply and still, you know, have that feeling of that you get when you're doing all the things right. So I like them to come home.

Speaker 1: 10:42

I think our house is sort of sort of spread, designed that way, in that that we have a mantle that has the TV on the inside and then there's lights behind that, and so it's really simple to put up some pretty decorations and make it feel like a little winter wonderland, right. But I was, like you know, every area had to be a certain way. I mean we had three or four trees every Christmas, you know, one in the front room, one outside, one in the living room and sometimes in other places. I mean we did all. So now it's we limit, right. But I still want them to come in and feel that the beauty and warmth that Christmas should be about and conjure up all those really warm feels. But yeah, this Christmas I'm hoping that all the boys will be home and to see that glimmer in their eyes again, you know, as if they were the toddlers and the expectancy of Christmas, christmas morning, and what that means to them in the physical realm, but also in the spiritual realm as well. So yeah, I hope I answered your question.

Speaker 2: 11:56

And you know what?

Speaker 2: 11:57

I think you just touched on something and it just brought something to my mind that, as mothers, I think that if we prepare ourselves for what Christmas is really about, I think that filters down to the rest of the family, it seeps into them.

Speaker 2: 12:17

They may not even realize it and you know, there's nothing intentional about it, what we're doing, but if we are in the right frame of mind, if we are ready to welcome everyone and not begrudge them that because we're exhausted and tired, and I know, like families who, you know, go way over budget because they just feel that they need to or do last minute things, and I think that we just need to keep in the forefront of our minds what it is that Christmas really is about. We really only have, you know, during the year, maybe two holidays, that, or you know, two seasons where we celebrate our faith and what we believe in, and Christmas is one of those, and I think that this is important, you know and yeah, I don't know, it's just it speaks to me, you know I want. It saddens me to see people so tired and exhausted or flustered, you know, trying to get ready for that one day.

Speaker 1: 13:33

Yeah, yeah, well, and I like to think I'd like to really focus on the little miracles that happen every single day up until that day, and if we're, if we have the blinders on because we're so busy, we miss those, and that's one of the things that I wanted to bring out with the book. It starts with Zechariah and the angel Gabriel coming to him and in a space we read about him going into the holy of holies and doing his job, and do you know how many times he would have had to tend to the altars and the incense and all those things, and it would have become very routine for him. You know he would have been. This would have been something that he would do all the time, and maybe he was tired, like moms are tired or we get up into our morning routine and fix the breakfast and the lunches and pack them and try and get everybody out the door and all those things and so but on that one day he was involved in a miracle. You know it was a miracle day for him, where the angel Gabriel came and said you are going to have a son and his name will be called John.

Speaker 1: 14:45

Well, the goal to me even now is in the routine of the day. How can we experience that miracle morning? You know, every morning, what during the day can God direct our eyes to so that we can see? Oh, that's, you know, he's with me, he's holding me. And what moment of Christ's birth can I think about today? And, you know, meditate on today, mary, you know.

Speaker 1: 15:19

It says let me see if I can find it really quickly but the Bible says that, mary. I mean Luke, chapter 2, verse 19,. It says but Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. And so what? Every day can we treasure a moment that God has given us, and for me it could be something as simple as running into the grocery store because I need that one or two ingredient to make that thing that I was supposed to make, and I'm already behind. But on my way in there's a whiff of the cinnamon pine cones and it just says oh, I get all the feels, even if it's just for a second, I get all the feels. It takes me back to Christmas's past and makes me know that this is what we're doing now, is we're creating another memory for our families around Christmas and what it really means.

Speaker 2: 16:15

I had a conversation with my kids sort of around this whole thing a while ago and I asked them what they remembered and what Christmases were like in the past. Because we had Christmases where, financially, we weren't very doing well and I had to come up with creative ways. And I've told the story of how one Christmas, right after my divorce, I really didn't have the finances for gifts and the kids wanted to buy each. I mean, they were really young, but even back then they liked to buy gifts for each other and I would give them a few dollars and they would do that. Well, I couldn't even afford that year the few dollars, but I had this roll of print paper that someone had given us and I said to them this year we're gonna do this and sort of hyped them up, got them going and that is one of our memories that has stayed with us and a bittersweet Christmas. It was because we didn't have a tree. So the kids Alexis, my oldest, drew out the tree and the two younger ones, they, either between the three of them cut out ornaments and colored in the tree and it was so sweet. We put it up. And then, for gifts, what are we gonna do? And I said oh, you guys are so creative, you guys are gonna make gifts for each other with paper. And my son made a gift for one of the girls which was sort of a beauty and makeup case. It had a blush and it all paper.

Speaker 2: 18:07

I tell you, I think those are our memories as a family of our best times together and I'm gonna ask you so think about it. Well, I tell you what, my, what a little tradition I had with the kids when they were young. So I'm gonna ask you after I tell you mine, and that is, there came a point in time where we lived in a small space. The kids all shared a room, so if they were going to get gifts, which they were from friends and family, they had to go into their toys and pick one thing, or multiple things, just depending, to give away.

Speaker 2: 18:52

But it had to be a gift that they would like to receive and not be old and ratty and dirty. It had to be in good condition, and I remember doing that the first year and it was a little bit difficult, because we're all built the same way. We don't wanna give the best of what we have. But as other Christmases would come, the date would get closer. The kids actually enjoyed it and said I'm gonna put this aside because I wanna give this one away. And that became a tradition we did for a while while the kids were little and had toys and things and they could give away, and I think it instills in our children that it's not always about the gifts and receiving. We have to think of others and how we can help someone who has less, and there's always someone who has less than us, so that became a little tradition. What were some of the things that you did with your kids to help them during this holiday season?

Speaker 1: 20:00

Well, so I'm not sure this helped them, but we have two pretty solid traditions that we have developed, one that we've just carried on from my mom and the other one that we've developed and that is we all decorate the tree, everybody helps decorate, and we put on the movie while you were sleeping. That is our all time, and by the time Christmas has happened, I've probably watched it four times. I just love that show with the chaos and it's all around Christmas and the family is so adorable. So anyway, that would be one. If you ask my kids what's our family tradition, that would be watching while you were sleeping, while we all decorate the tree. The other one is my mother's Christmas coffee cake. She's made a coffee cake for every Christmas morning since before I was born, likely because I don't ever remember a Christmas not having her Christmas coffee cake, and so now I make several Christmas coffee cakes just for our family alone, but I make a lot of others for other people, and my kids have taken that on, and one of my sons, one year in high school I think he must have made eight cakes in one day to give away to friends and people that he cared about. So those are the two real traditions that we have as far as Christmas goes, that no Christmas would be complete without either of those.

Speaker 1: 21:30

But when you talked about tough times financially, we have certainly had plenty of those, and particularly when the kids were little, we went through what I call a really a financial famine that lasted four years, and so one year I couldn't afford to buy the ingredients to do the Christmas coffee cake and share that with our neighbors. We had enough to buy one for ourselves or to make one for ourselves, but I thought, what do I have? And God was so faithful Always he was faithful during those times and I thought what do I have? And I had a lot of wreaths Christmas wreaths that I basically disassembled and used the wreath itself. And the other thing that I had was we're an airline family, so anytime anyone would go away they'd bring back all the little samples of soaps and shampoos and all those kinds of things that you find, and so I had a big bag of that. And what I did is then is I made my neighbors, I made them Christmas wreaths, christmas bathroom wreaths, wreaths they could put in their bathroom. I still have mine and I still put it up, because what do you put up in a bathroom to make it look Christmasy? I love it, yeah.

Speaker 1: 23:00

So again, there were just many, many Christmases. We were very, very tight and I write a lot of those in it's A Wrap to help, because I think a lot of times, well, a lot of families experience those financial struggles and they think it's only me, I'm the only one that can't do this for my kids this year. I can't get them that phone, I can't get them, whatever it is that's the hottest item or whatever, and we tend to feel sorry for ourselves. So a lot of the scripture that I took and used in the book then met with a lot of our family, things that happened and how we made Christmas beautiful and how God comes to us.

Speaker 1: 23:42

And I think you know I'm not for sure, for sure, but I feel like God is so close to us when we do go through difficulties and struggles and trials that maybe even more so than when things are going just swimmingly and we tend not to reach out to God because we don't need him as much or we think we don't as the times when we are desperate for him. So I think Christmas is an especially wonderful time to draw closer to the Lord, and particularly if we're having difficulties during that time, and he will meet us where we are and show us his beauty and magnificence just inside of that Christmas season and the birth of his son.

Speaker 2: 24:24

I think it's so important. You know there's there's almost like a stigma about being financially, you know, in a difficult place and people don't tend to to share. I mean, I never did. I was very ashamed of those days because, again, you know, I was a single mom that felt that you know people looking at me maybe and as and I'm sure nobody was it was just, I think we have certain Hangups in our own lives and I wasn't in the best place, you know, spiritually, and I never shared with anyone the struggles that I was going through. But not but yet, because, even though I was not in a good place, the Lord was taking care of us.

Speaker 2: 25:12

Because someone, during those very, very lean years, came up to me About 10 days before Christmas not even handed me a check church and said to me this is to give a Christmas to your children. Now, the person did not know that I was struggling financially and he said I want you to buy something to make Christmas special for your children this year. And I knew what the person meant by that. In another words, don't pay bills, don't put necessities, but make it fun for the children.

Speaker 2: 25:56

I have told my children from day one about this blessing that we receive so that they, in turn, understand what to have empathy for other people and to reach out to other people. Those linears did one thing for me, and that it was a blessing. I look at those linears as blessings for me because it made me sensitive to other people's needs around holidays, around special times of the year, at any time, being aware of how people may be lacking and needing something. I think that if we step outside of our own suffering as we think about it and it really shouldn't be when we're celebrating such a joyous occasion of the birth of Christ if we step outside of that and look if we can help others, I think it is a blessing to them and to us.

Speaker 1: 27:10

Yes, absolutely. We were the recipients too of someone at church and we received a nice check I think it was $300 to spend on our children and that Christmas wouldn't have happened, in terms of any gifts of some of any sort, without that. When we experience the mercy of someone else and through God, the Lord obviously put it on that person's heart to give, we are much more likely then to be able to do that for someone else. So encourage anyone who's listening. If you are in a space where you can bless someone, pray about that and see who might be in your circle that you can bless.

Speaker 2: 27:57

I agree with you. It is important, and I think we forget what the true reason is for this season. It is celebrating the birth of Christ, celebrating all that came with that. He was born for one reason and that was to die on the cross for our sins and to forgive us. To me, that is such awesomeness that I want to celebrate that.

Speaker 2: 28:37

I've been guilty, I have to say, and I wish I knew better at the time, but can't go back. I wish I had brought in and really driven home the importance of my children, not just then, but throughout the year, reading scripture with my children. That's something I did when they were very, very young, but didn't continue because I wasn't in a good place at the time. So how could I have done it for my children? I pray that parents take on that and I challenge them to the parents listening Start that tradition with your children, start it at Christmas time. It's a very natural way of doing it Read the birth of Christ, read the story, the nativity story, and then keep going, keep going throughout the year, carve out time every day, and I know of a family that every day at supper, the dad would read a portion of scripture at dinner Nothing long, obviously. You know they were eating. You know the longer ones came during the day and whatever.

Speaker 2: 29:59

But I always thought about that and said I wish I had done something similar with my children. The only thing that I gave to my kids in that way is they say grace before eating. And it's interesting because when friends would come, my kids would pray. And you know, now I have bonus children, I have beautiful bonus children and you know, some come from faith-based homes. They're Christians, you know, and they serve the Lord and others don't. And yet everyone knows we pray and we say grace. It's not enough, it's start. But my challenge really is, you know as you said from, your challenge was you know, look outside and bless others with what you can and I challenge them to start to read the word of God. That'll be an awesome, awesome gift for your children, right?

Speaker 1: 31:03

Yes.

Speaker 2: 31:03

For many, for many years to come.

Speaker 1: 31:06

Yes, it is. The word really is a roadmap, the roadmap for our lives, and so the earlier we can get them, our children, involved in the word and continue that the roadmap for their lives becomes more clear. And instead of some other time down, you know, down along the way, I wish we started reading the Bible together and at some point we stopped. And I too I feel like I wish we wouldn't have. I wish you know my one of my passions is to get the word into the high schoolers before they're done, by the time they're 18, to at least have read it once, to know what's there and know that they can return to that certainly.

Speaker 2: 31:53

But, yeah, I think that is. You know, as we were talking, I was thinking about that that what a gift that, as parents, we can give to our children. I think that's the ultimate gift, the alt, that's what I should have named my book, the ultimate gift oh, there's another book there, andrea, oh goodness, yeah, it's. I think that is an ultimate gift that we can give our children is drawing them closer to God, to the Lord and to the word of God and prayer. That is the gift that, as parents, we should strive to give our children, not the latest, what you know, fad gifts clothing that will they will outgrow, toys that they will. I think that, wow, you know, I'm speaking to myself, I, you know, like, if I have, I have grandchildren, one day I will. This is going to be, I think, my next endeavor that yeah yeah, my endeavor.

Speaker 2: 32:57

You know I think about that. You know, as a parent, I raise my children. They're all adults. They're out of the home. What can I do to serve the Lord for the next generation?

Speaker 1: 33:09

And.

Speaker 2: 33:09

I think about if God blesses me with grandchildren one day. It's a second chance for me and it brings tears to my eyes to say it, but it is a second chance for me to to reach out to the younger generation and show and give them this ultimate gift of of love and grace.

Speaker 1: 33:34

Yeah, yeah, oh, I love that. Yeah, one of my goals too, you know, as, as you know, I've written the how to read the Bible in a year and for adults. But I want to go back and redo that for children and then for high schoolers as well have a curriculum that they could follow. It's it's a passion of mine. I want to. How can we get the word into the children and into the teenagers?

Speaker 2: 33:57

Yeah, yeah, I, I, yeah, I think this is going to be 2024 is going to be a good one for us. Andrea, the Lord, the Lord has has really tasked us with some responsibility and I think that we need to follow up with it and, you know, as parents, I think this is what the Lord has tasked us with not just putting a roof over their heads and and feeding their body, but feeding their souls, and I think that I think this Christmas, we should remember that and endeavor to give our children this full and complete and perfect gift. Andrea, before we wrap up, would you like to share a little bit about your book and how people can receive or buy or not receive sorry, buy your book, and where they can find your book?

Speaker 1: 34:52

Sure, Well, it can be found on Amazon Again. It's called it's a Wrap and subtitle A Christmas Devotional for Moms. What's in it is daily there's and I went from December 1st through January 1st a short devotional. The Bible verses in Luke one and Luke two. That's it.

Speaker 1: 35:15

It's a short Bible verse every day with a short story of of how we can reframe our busy days during Christmas and remember the Christmas story every single day and have experiences that could we could have been really not consciously aware of that bring joy to our heart. But allowing and and asking God, hey, don't let me miss you, lord, show me those special moments every day that you provide for me that can take, take me back into Christmas's past and really give give us some more energy, some spiritual energy, physical energy, to make another beautiful Christmas this year. I can get tiring, like I said I I am the Grinch if I don't get things done somewhat early in the in the year. I'm known for putting up Christmas, sometimes by Halloween, so that I am not the Grinch. I know that if I wait too long, I am. So anyway, it's just it's like that.

Speaker 1: 36:24

The, the book, is full of stories of our Christmas's past, along with the Blessed Christmas story and it's not the whole book of Luke, it's just parts of Luke one and really all of Luke two. To help us read the Christmas story with that reverence and rediscover the holiness of this season as we go through the hustle and bustle of it all I want to thank you so much for coming on out of the darkness and talking about Christmas's past and what we've been through, and about your book it's a wrap.

Speaker 2: 37:00

And, to my friends who are listening, please check out Andrea Lendi online. I'll have everything in the show notes and you can find her book it's a wrap, and all the other books that she has written on Amazon, and I suggest you get it quickly and have it in time for December 1st, andrea, it has been a pleasure. Thank you so much for having me, andrea.

Speaker 1: 37:24

It's so much fun to talk about Christmas, our favorites. Well, my favorite season I agree.

Speaker 2: 37:33

Have a blessed holiday and a Merry Christmas Me too. Thank you for joining me to stay connected with the Christmas story. If you like this podcast, can you help me find new listeners by leaving a rating and review? This small step takes only a moment, but really helps grow the listening audience. So let me thank you in advance. I hope you have a wonderful day and until next time let's continue on our journey as followers of Jesus Christ. I am Ruth Huffseppian.