Ready to Burn it All Down? That is What Mentorship is for. [243]

Ready to Burn it All Down? That is What Mentorship is for.

• The importance of mentorship in your business.  
• The moment when you know you really want this.
• It was my mindset that put me in the situation.
• What does a good mentor say to you?
• The importance of having a mentor.
• Why are we not growing more in a mentorship-led way?
• Don’t do this alone. Have a mentor.

Lifting you up, supporting you through the good and bad, helping you navigate difficult situations and so much more.

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Transcript

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I really wanted to do this episode by the ocean. So I'm really hoping that I can edit this myth that the ocean sound is an annoying, throw off the birds in the background and people walking around. So we're gonna see how this goes. So I wanted to talk about mentorship today and the navigation. And the things that I went through in my business since 2016. And the things that I would not have made it through without that mentor without that guidance without that leadership of someone who had been through this before, before me, and was able to help me navigate through that. And many of you have heard the day I almost quit my business. And I think we get to go back further than that, because there's been multiple times that I was gonna quit my business. And I think any good business owner, any good entrepreneur or CEO, that has huge dreams and goals, is always going to want more, right, you're always going to want more, you're always going to want the next level, you're always going to want the next day. And so there is this caring in this. This caring and love for not only your business, but how you serve and support people, and therefore you are going to be disappointed sometimes. It's just the way it is right, you are going to be disappointment pointed, I think the thing is, is that I can honestly say that the growth and the amount of disappointment, I wouldn't say that it's less, but I think that I can navigate to the disappointments now like when the disappointments happen, where I don't reach a goal, or I don't get as many people as I want in a program or whatever it ends up looking like, I can navigate that so much better now, because I don't make it mean, the things that I used to make it mean, the things that I used to make it mean, were all about me, and how bad I sucked, and how bad I didn't do my job and how bad I would say you know all these things myself, because we beat ourselves up, we do not give ourselves grace. And so that would be the number one thing that I have learned that I make things mean something and they don't always mean what I try to make them mean, plain and simple. And so when I look back, and I think about the first time this happened to me, I'll be honest, I think it was one of those. I don't know if want to call it testing moments. I don't know if I necessarily believe in that. But definitely a moment to say How about do you really want this chick? Like really, let's be honest. And that was after it took me six months to sign up from her first mastermind. And so it took me six months I made had made my highest month ever. And I was like okay, yes, I'm in. Right. Funny thing. Yes, I met after the highest month ever. And that would have been in March, signed up and started in the beginning of April. And then by the end of May, I was scrambling, not necessarily financially, yes, again, I wasn't where I wanted to be, and my revenue went down. But what I will say is that there were a lot of external factors. There were a lot of things going on at home. My kid had just flunked out of college. And as a mom, you just feel like a failure rate. And so I had all these things I was navigating, that was really, really hard for me. And it's one of the most amazing things. And if you've worked with me, and I've recommended this book to you before, but I was in really a low low, like a low, low. And again, that's not even talk about the financial thing, right, let's talk about my mind, myself was in the low low. And the thing that I couldn't get as I couldn't get out of it, I couldn't get out of it. And maybe it was a slight depression. I don't know. But I struggled the whole month of May was really bad. And so I listened to the audiobook. The decision by Kevin Hart, if you haven't listened to it, I highly recommend it. But it is what I needed at the time because I couldn't smile I didn't want to laugh. I was very again not giving myself grace. Thank god I've done work since then. But blaming and taking the blame and taking the weight of everything that he you know, him not finishing, I want to say fell but that's not true. A him not finishing what he said he was going to do. But here's the thing. It was my mindset that put me in the situation that I was in it was my mind. And so when I sort of listen to this book by Kevin Hart, number one, Kevin Hart is hilarious. Number two, you can't not laugh. Okay? When Kevin Hart says was that my stomach or did I fart? Like in the middle of an audiobook? I'm sorry, friends. You're gonna freakin laugh. laugh your head off. Like it's so funny. And then Kevin Hart is also giving me personal development and advice. Also funny, but also okay, I'm listening Great, you got me to open up, you cracked my shell, that was really hardened because of a bad month in my mindset, and you got me to open up. And here's the funny thing. Looking back I thought June was like a most amazing month. And financially revenue wise it was the same as May. It was just it was different. It was it was different. And that's one thing that mentorship helped me do helped me be able to figure out shit on my own. And matter of fact, one of my mentors just posted this today. She said, a good mentor helps you trust them, a better mentor helps you trust yourself. And that is honest truth. I was given the tools to help myself to start trusting myself. Then we fast forward to the time, Elon Musk quit my business that I talked about mostly, and again, started the beginning of the month looking like I was the enemy. And this is the thing, this is the thing. This is a downward spiral that Crissy Conner has put herself in. Occasionally, I will look and see what's coming in for the month right? Before the month even gets here. And I have I would already back then I would already admit defeat in the month honeymoon started. And so that's pretty much what I did in September, which I did reach out to my mentor, I think it was the fourth or fifth of September, and basically was giving up and said if this month doesn't turn around, I will be leaving the program. Because I'd already fulfilled my commitment. And I'm just gonna go get a job. Like that's pretty much what it was. And it's funny, because everybody asks, What did she tell you? What did she say to you? And I'll be honest, the thing that she said to me, she probably would have not said to anybody else, she knew me, she knew my business. And that's what a good mentor does, right? Whether it's a one on one client or a mastermind client, it doesn't matter. A good mentor knows you and your business knows how you work knows what how you operate knows how to help you improve. And so the thing she said to me weren't profound the things she said to me were asking me questions so that I could reflect on myself. And sure, she cheered me on Sure. She listened to what I had to say, Sure, she asked me questions a little bit deeper and had me thinking, but at the end of the day, as any good mentor, she would never take credit for that. And that's correct, because she could have told me all these things. And I could have literally just still quit, right. But he did the work. I put my best foot forward. And literally at that point said, What do I have to lose by doing these things by doing things I know to do. And that $2,000 month, ended up being a $15,000 month, and my highest month ever. And it also meant I skipped 10k months, I literally never had a 10k month ever, ever. It was the craziest thing, because I never in a million years thought I would make $13,000 in three weeks. And that is not $13,000. My friends it is $13,000 of recurring revenue, not just 13,000. That was also before I had my programs. It was all client work. And so when I started my programs, which also I was against I didn't want to do at first. And but I I worked all the time and my mentor knew that. And she said I think it's time for you to do like a mastermind or in a short call. And I was like I don't know, like so. And finally by the end of that year, I said yes. He said yes, I'm doing it. Then in January, had my biggest launch ever. $40,000 $40,000 launch, not a bad first launch. When everything went wrong. My Ad Account got shut down. So I lowered my goal, then actually over achieved my original goal, even with no ads. And it just showed me that like, literally when you when you do the things, when you have a deadline, and you got to make it happen. You make it happen every single time. And although I know a lot of the things my mentors tell me, I'm too close. It's one thing I talk about all the time zooming out, we get to zoom out to see how we change people's lives how we do this and that. But we struggled zooming out on our own business. We struggle with that. Because we're so in it. Day to day we're doing things day to day. And that's what a good mentor helps you do. Zoom out, see what's possible. Help us get to the next thing. Help us reach our goals. Give us the support when it hits the fan, or when we're going to quit or when we're going to throw in the towel or when we're going to find Our client, like literally walking through and navigating through all of that is the main reason to have a mentor. They've done it before they know the right things to say, we are to close, my friends. I am a social media strategist. I'm a marketing strategist. I am great at teaching all of these things. I'm great at coming up with ideas to myself. But sometimes I need to riff with a mentor. Sometimes they need to riff on how I'm going to launch this. Sometimes they need to riff on the strategy, sometimes they need to riff, right, I can't do it all myself, there is no self made millionaire, I don't care what anybody says. Even if you never had a mentor, and you literally had somebody watch your kid, or watch your dog or walk your dog or bring you groceries, you had support. Why are we not accepting more mentorship type support? Why are we not growing more in a more mentorship led way? You know, I thought it was interesting. My one of my recent mentors, like you want to be better at leadership to lead. Be in a container where you see that happening. You want to be a better mentor, be with a mentor. So you can be led through these things, and then help somebody else you lead to them to. If you want to teach, learn, implement, then teach it your own way. But we, as leaders, we as potential leaders, potential coaches, potential mentors, whatever you wanna call yourself, we have to step up first week of December 1, we get to step up, make the decision, execute, implement, whatever you want to call it, learn, grow. And then we can help others do the same. It's really hard for leadership to be taught Sure, you can take classes, sure you can do all these things. But until you're in it, in it, and you're doing it, and you screw it up sometimes, or you say the wrong things sometimes. And then you fix it. You own it, you fix it. You make it better, you do better the next time you do the next right thing. That is growth, my friends. And the only way to get through that in a more seamless manner is to honestly have a mentor, a coach, a mastermind community to help you navigate that. Don't do this alone, we are stronger together. It is more fun together. And it is hard to do this alone. It is lonely to do this alone. When you have this energetic exchange of money, it's different. I don't allow many people to give me free advice. Most of the time, when I start get when I start in a place where I need advice, or I need mentorship. I asked for a payment link. And I've been doing that since 2019. When I used to ask my friend Kelly, who taught me everything I know about Facebook ads ever like you sent me your link, kissing your link. I never wanted that advice or that mentorship for free. I didn't want that guidance for free. I wanted to pay for it. And that's what we get to do. An energetic exchange that we can use to grow ourselves and grow our business and really and truly make a difference in other people's lives.