Live Your Extraordinary Life With Michelle Rios

Healing Money Wounds to Receive More Wealth with Emily Wilcox

• Michelle Rios

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Discover the transformative journey of Emily Wilcox, a dynamic entrepreneur who turned a side hustle into a flourishing million-dollar baby onesie business on Amazon. Emily joins us to share her remarkable transition from corporate life to entrepreneurship, shedding light on the unique challenges she faced while balancing motherhood, a demanding job, and a burgeoning business. We delve into how these experiences led her to uncover and heal her own "money wounds," ultimately sparking the creation of her innovative methodology for addressing financial barriers. 

Emily introduces us to the powerful concept of "money wounds," exploring the six core types, including money shame and hard money. Particularly, we discuss the "hard money" wound and how societal conditioning often misleads us into believing that financial success must come through relentless hard work and sacrifice. Emily challenges this narrative by advocating for the value and compensation of our true gifts and passions, which bring joy and playfulness into our lives. Through inspiring personal stories, she illustrates how healing money wounds and shifting our mindsets can lead to both financial success and a more fulfilling life.

We dive deeper into the intricate "money shame wound," examining its ties to self-worth and societal conditioning, especially among women and people of color. Emily emphasizes the importance of aligning wealth-building efforts with one's authentic self and core values. We also discuss the essential role of collaboration and continuous inner work in achieving true wealth and empowerment. This episode is a treasure trove of insights and strategies for anyone looking to heal their relationship with money and build a life of financial abundance and purpose. Listen in for an enlightening discussion that could change your financial future forever.

WAYS TO CONNECT WITH ME:

Speaker 1:

Welcome everyone to another episode of the Live your Extraordinary Life podcast. I'm your host, michelle Rios, and I am thrilled to introduce to you to a very new friend, emily Wilcox. Emily is a speaker, an author and host of the Joyous Path to Millions podcast. Her new book, wounds to Wealth the Life-Changing Method of Diagnosing and Healing Money Wounds to Receive More Wealth is out today. People, so super exciting. I'm thrilled to have you here today, emily. Welcome to the show.

Speaker 2:

Thank you so much for having me. I'm so happy to be here.

Speaker 1:

So, emily, I want to jump right in because I had the ability to just sort of sit down and do a little bit of reading about you and what you've been up to and I'm just I'm fascinated with the work you do. We love to talk about money and I'm noticing that I am frozen on the screen. Am I frozen for you? Yeah, now you're back. That was not good. We're having thunderstorms out here, so we will edit that out. So we love talking about money here on the Live your Extraordinary Life podcast and we do a lot about money mindset and really understanding sort of the underlying beliefs that we all inherit, usually from society or family, about money or family about money, and I'm fascinated about your story. So could you just kick us off and tell us a little bit about what led you to this calling? How did your own money story influence the work that you're doing today?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I mean I really stumbled into this work. Stumbled into this work and it was definitely through my own story and my own money stuff that was coming up. For many years I worked in corporate and so I just felt like I make what I make, it's dictated by the market, my employer decides whether I get a raise and what percentage and that sort of thing, and so I didn't really think I had a whole lot going on with money, because I was living in a very normal way and I wasn't talking about how I really thought and felt these deep inner things, and so I just kind of assumed like everyone was in a similar situation. And when I became a mother, my husband and I started what was like a little side hustle at the time. I'm like off on maternity leave for like six weeks, and why not start a business while you're figuring out how to have a new baby.

Speaker 1:

start a new business business while you're figuring out how to have a new baby start a new business.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, exactly. So we decided to make these baby onesies that had funny phrases on them and we were going to sell them on Amazon, and so that was kind of my first foray into entrepreneurship. And my entry back into corporate America was much rougher than I expected. I always thought I would be a working mom that was what the women in my family did, and I really liked working and had a lot of identity around that. But then I found myself driving around Los Angeles with pumps attached to both boobs, paying somebody else $1,000 to watch my kid, and it was like every cell in my being was like this is not it, this is not the way that this is supposed to go. And so I had this thought like well, I wonder, maybe this little side hustle thing that we're just starting, perhaps we could grow it to the point where, when we're ready to have our second, then I could do it differently, I could get like a do-over, then I could do it differently, I could get a do-over. And so for the next three years, I'm a good mama in the morning and in the afternoon, I'm a good employee during the day, and as soon as my daughter goes to bed, I'm putting in like three hours a night on this entrepreneurial e-commerce endeavor and fast forward three years. I'm pregnant with my second.

Speaker 2:

We've sold over a million dollars in baby onesies on Amazon. It sounds like a big number, but when you understand product-based businesses and keeping up with growth and marketing costs and all of that, it wasn't really enough to say, yep, for sure, this replaces the income. We're good. And so one of my mentors was like you guys are the go-to people for Amazon. Everyone asks your advice. You're telling them what to do. No one can figure out how to do it and you are the only ones that can't see that this is a business and you need to make this into something.

Speaker 2:

And so we decided to start an Amazon marketing agency and it was like the two businesses together, plus some paid maternity leave, plus a hope and a prayer and some divine intervention, like all duct taped together, somehow made it so that I didn't have to go back to my corporate job after having my son and once I was focused on the agency, which is a service-based business, that's what brought up all the symptoms of these undiagnosed, unhealed money wounds that I had. It was like, in theory, my income is uncapped, but I've never felt more scared about where the next dollar is going to come from If I was pricing our services way too low because I wanted it to be an easy yes and just felt like beholden to clients that paid us and really wanted to over-deliver for them. If anyone said no and decided not to work with us, I took it as a personal rejection. And so I was really on this whole emotional rollercoaster and it felt like making money was hard. And yet here I was in Southern California and I'm looking around at other people and I'm like it doesn't really seem hard for a lot of other entrepreneurs in my network and so I wonder what's going on here.

Speaker 2:

And that really was the start of what would ultimately turn into building another seven-figure business, but doing it in a way where I turned inward, I figured out where I was projecting these limiting thoughts and beliefs onto money and then really feeling called to helping other women entrepreneurs to heal their money wounds. So it became this entire methodology. I collected data on 10,000 people. Now I've literally written the book on it. I've had the pleasure of coaching hundreds of women on healing their money wounds and stepping into more wealth and really building a business in a way that feels aligned to them, so it's not hustle and grind and then you get the money later and you're happy. But how do we do it in a way that feels joyous every step of the path?

Speaker 1:

Fascinating, and the part that really catches my attention is this idea of being in alignment, because we all know and I read this about you as well we get caught up in that hustle and that grind as the way that money must be made and we're just sort of floating and steaming ourselves in masculine energy, which, from a due perspective, isn't bad. But I can just feel my cortisol levels going up before you even start the project and you're like this is what it's going to be like day in and day out. This isn't what I want. So let's talk a little bit about that. Let's delve right into the book. So, wounds to wealth you dive into diagnosing and healing money wounds. Can you explain what money wounds are, so everyone has a good understanding of that, and why they're such a critical block to generating wealth?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, absolutely so. Money wounds are limiting thought and feeling. They live in brain and body and they keep us from building the wealth that we want. Because in this sort of stuck trauma, in this negative feeling, it projects onto our thoughts about money, our feelings about money and then, of course, the actions that we take around money as well. And in the book I talk about this a lot and I pull in other research because in this big umbrella of money mindset and I'm guilty of calling it money mindset sometimes too, but it sure does make it sound like it's from the neck up it sure does make it sound like it's from the neck up and the truth of the matter is that these wounds, they don't just live in our head, it's not just a way of thinking, but they're actually become stuck trauma in the body.

Speaker 2:

And there's a lot of really great evidence about this and about the way that trauma lives in our bodies and the way that it feels and the way that it impacts things. And so when I talk about healing each money wound, we really take a mind and body approach so that we can change our thinking. We can also change our way of feeling, clear out those old stuck emotions, and then in that vacuum, in that space that we've created, then we go through what I call the wounds to wealth, alchemy, activation, and alchemy is a verb and it's described as a magical transformation, and so it's like we're taking one thing and we're turning it into something else, and so we take the very place where we felt wounded around money and we turn it into a new channel for wealth to flow to us. So that's what a money wound is, and there are six core money wounds and I'd be happy to run through them.

Speaker 1:

Well, I was going to say I know that there are six core money wounds that you outline in the book. Could you give us a glimpse into what they are, Maybe dive into one or two of them to talk a little bit about how that might show up for somebody in their financial or business endeavors?

Speaker 2:

Yeah for sure. So there's the money shame wound. I'm not worthy of wealth. The evil money wound being rich is bad or wrong. The hard money wound Making money is hard. I know that one.

Speaker 2:

well, that one, the money trust wound. I know that one well. That one, the money trust wound I don't trust myself with money. The safe money wound I'm not going to feel safe until I've got this financial cushion. And the disappearing money wound I don't trust money. Money is always leaving me.

Speaker 2:

So those are the six and you can feel, especially if you're someone that's empathic and tapped into energy, that they each actually really have their own unique energetic signature. And that's why I'm so passionate about this work, because when we sort of just lump everything together as money stuff, money mindset, we're not being precise enough. And when we're more precise and we get to the root cause, then we can give more potent medicine and the healing is more profound. But let's dive into the hard money wound, because we've already actually kind of been touching on that a little bit and we have a lot of evidence around this. So it's no surprise.

Speaker 2:

Of course it can come from family of origin stuff, it can come from societal conditioning there's plenty of that but we also have tons of our own evidence. Why? Because look at, when you started working, did you have a really valuable skill set that people really wanted to seek out and pay good money for no, you had time and you were a warm body and you were willing to do something, and so most of us started off really exchanging time for money or exchanging manual labor for money, and that was kind of all we had right, and so we built lots of evidence.

Speaker 1:

And we thought that, well, I need to prove that I can be worthy of getting more money, and if I work hard, they'll see the evidence of my worth. That was something everyone talked about when we were first starting off our career. So the person who stayed the latest who gave up their weekend that you know went the extra mile and a half, became the one that was put on the pedestal.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's exactly right and it was true to a degree, right that, like if you were the one who showed up and went the extra mile a lot of times you were rewarded for that. You know, we could go down a whole rabbit hole of. You know, the younger generations that are coming into thes tend to be like ah, they're lazy, they're unmotivated, they're entitled and it's like well, actually they just don't buy into the same bullshit that we bought into and that's very threatening to this old paradigm way of doing things. But here's the thing. If you were to ask me Michelle, like, okay, I've got two options for you, emily. Um, one option I need you to really study up on case law for divorces and I need you to be the point person on this nasty divorce that's happening and get it all resolved. So that's one option.

Speaker 2:

Or I could have you speak on a stage about money and wealth and how to heal your issues and how to step into more wealth. Heal your issues and how to step into more wealth. Which one do you need to get paid more for? Now, my natural inclination, still to this day, is you'd have to pay me more to do the whole divorce lawyer thing, because that sounds terrible to me. I don't know anything about it. It sounds like hard work. I don't really want to do it and so the only way I would do it is if there were a massive financial payoff for me.

Speaker 2:

And then option number two, which is actually my gift and the thing I'm the best at and have this real deep expertise it doesn't feel like work to me. This podcast doesn't feel like work. It feels like play, pleasure, joy, fun, and so to everyone listening, you're probably noticing yourself in this example, and so we still have that kind of natural patterning of I need to be paid the most for the thing that's going to make me suffer the most. And when we heal that and I give the exact processes that we go through to heal the hard money wound then we start to open up ways that money gets to flow to us through our gifts and where it feels more effortless and it feels like easy money, it's easy as relative. What's easy for me is not easy for you. If I went up to like 20 people on the street and said, hey, could I hand you a microphone and put you in front of a thousand people and have you talk about money For a lot of them that would be like their worst case scenario. It'd be.

Speaker 1:

Emily and Michelle and everyone else would be like have fun.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you two handle that. The rest of us have an anxiety spike, even imagining that happening.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, no, understandable. It's interesting though, because I know you've had the opportunity now as you have grown really the way you work with people from your Amazon businesses to now in the coaching arena and mentoring, looking at folks that have been traditionally successful in the corporate environment and then watching them transition into the entrepreneur space. It's interesting to me. Two things happen, and I mean this is my own story as well. I had a very specific expectation of what was going to happen in the corporate space, based on history and my tolerance level. Right, what would I do for this level of you know when I was in the executive suite. So I kind of knew, like this is what I should be compensated for.

Speaker 1:

When you walk into the entrepreneurial space, it's a little bit like the wild west.

Speaker 1:

It is, in lots of ways right and I say this knowing full well that there are a lot of online course curators, coaches and other entrepreneurs listening into this podcast what I find is that, because there is an immediate, almost like a release, like people like, oh, this is so much more my jam or I feel so much more in alignment, I don't care if I don't get paid as much.

Speaker 1:

Well, there's a relief in that and there's a detachment in that, which is great. But also and I know you said this earlier I'm watching a lot of people not know how to really charge for their services when they're solving a legitimate problem that someone has and they're in this place of service and also willing to kind of lower their bar from where they were in the corporate space of like, well, this is better for me, so I don't mind that I don't make more and I just for me. It felt very counterintuitive when I was watching all of this happen in the early days of my transition going, wait, hold on. I get what you're saying, but you're solving real world problems. Why wouldn't you be compensated for them? So help me understand because I know you've seen this time and again what happens in the mind of a woman that's making this transition into entrepreneurship that all of a sudden she's like I don't mind, I'll downsize, I'll do what it is and have this freedom, yeah, and then kind of gives away their power on the money front.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

I think, unnecessarily so in lots of ways.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you bring up a great point. So I mean, this is classic behavior of a money shame wound, which is the most common wound? Well, it's most commonly the strongest, I should say. So you're most likely to have that as your top money wound, and it's. It's a worthiness thing. And, of course, you know, for women in particular and and for, like, people of color, and you know it societally there's such strong conditioning around you making a sacrifice and you giving up what would be most beneficial to you in service to others, and that even gets passed down in the DNA, it gets inherited ancestrally at this point as well, and so when you're in corporate, a couple of things happen. Number one it feels like the value is externally dictated, and so that feels more comfortable. For sure, you're typically not having to do a ton of negotiating around your own fees.

Speaker 1:

Even if you wanted to. Even if you wanted to, that's you wanted to have that much yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so that happens. And then the other thing is that, um, again, this is where the hard money wound kind of plays with the money shame wound. If you're doing something you don't like, if you're doing something you don't like, you're more willing to advocate for needing to be paid well, and so then all of a sudden you're doing what you like and you're having to, for the first time, really kind of put your own price on your services. And if you haven't ever even considered whatever worthiness, stuff is lurking in unconscious mind and maybe living in your body which for many of us, I think we haven't.

Speaker 2:

You know, I worthiness was not a part of, like, my vernacular until you know whatever, maybe six or seven years ago, right, um, and so it's like the symptoms were there, but the symptoms led me back to understanding what the root cause of it was. But but it it was kind of a breadcrumb trail to get there. So you know, it's just so common for for women to be self-sacrificing, to think that they're not necessarily worthy of charging top dollar or, uh, really stepping into big wealth, top dollar, or really stepping into big wealth. And so then the other piece of the money shame wound is not only not charging enough on the front end, but then over delivering and having weak boundaries and not getting support and help on the back end and of course that's a recipe for massive burnout over time. I don't care how much you like what you're doing and how relieving it feels to leave corporate. You do that long enough and you're going to be. You're going to realize you've got a really shitty boss and it's you.

Speaker 1:

So true, so true. Let's talk about this, the shame around money, for a minute, because I do think that particular wound is one that a lot of people don't realize that they have worthiness issues because they were super confident in one environment and then they walk into another and like I didn't even know this was an issue for me and yet it comes up over and over again, Knowing that this is a big driver for a lot of folks, what's just one step that someone could take in starting to heal that relationship with money around worthiness? Where do you even begin? And obviously we're going to have links to the book because I encourage everyone to go and get a copy and support Emily. It's just great information to educate yourself on and up-level what you're doing. But if you could just share what's one step someone could take to start to heal that relationship with money?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so when we talk about doing mind and body healing, one of the ways it's good to approach mind is getting conscious mind on board, and so we don't get a manual for these human bodies that we're in, which is kind of a shame because we don't even really understand a lot of how all of this works. Right, but we have two parts of our mind. We have conscious and unconscious, and they don't really talk to each other because they speak a completely different language. So you've got conscious mind that understands logic and critical thinking and executive functioning, and then you've got unconscious mind that logic is a foreign language, it is not understood at all. Unconscious mind responds to imagery, imagination, visuals, storytelling, specificity, getting the five senses involved, things going on, and their mission in life is very different. Unconscious mind really has one mission, which is to keep you alive, and so when it perceives anything that's a threat, it takes over and it doesn't matter that. Conscious mind understands that something different is happening. And we've all had the experience where we're in the movie theater and we're having a hard time breathing normally because of what's happening on the screen, and then something scary happens and we jump out of our skin and feel scared. Well, conscious mind knows we're in a theater and we're eating popcorn and we're totally safe. So why is it that we still react? It's because unconscious mind is actually in control of all of that, and unconscious mind has a hard time perceiving between reality and just imagery and imagination. And so you've got a lot going on.

Speaker 2:

And again, there's no manual for this. So, getting back to your question about what's one thing we can do with the money shame wound, we can get conscious mind on board. We also have to get unconscious mind on board. We also have to get body on board, but let's start with conscious mind, because it's we, it's the thing we have the easiest access to.

Speaker 2:

And what conscious mind has been telling you, if you have an unhealed money shame wound is like I'm not really that special, I'm not really sure that what I do is that different than you know all these other people on the internet and you know why would somebody hire me and pay this when they could hire somebody else and pay that price? And so conscious mind is kind of collecting evidence in support of this narrative that you're not really all that special, you're not necessarily the top dollar premium person, yeah, and and. So when we start to poke holes in that. There's lots of different things that we can do. So one is what even is worthiness? You know, it's like we can't hold it in our hand.

Speaker 1:

Right.

Speaker 2:

I can't quantitatively measure how worthy you are compared to me, and so an interesting thought exercise is like well, did we have this the day we were born? It's like if I asked you to change your height, you're going to have a hard time doing that. If I asked you to change just something about you that you were given it's genetically imprinted and that's that. If I asked you to change, you know just something about you that you, you were given it's genetically imprinted and that's that right. Your height, your skin color, your. There are things about you that would be very difficult to change, that you just came in with. But there's not that many of those things and everything else has been conditioned. So you know, babies, don't start out with a worthiness problem Like they. They are infinitely worthy. They're like we will be the most giant pain in the ass you've ever met before.

Speaker 1:

And we will do nothing but sit there and you will give me gifts and feed me and care for me. Exactly.

Speaker 2:

Exactly Like talk about inherent worthiness. Right, like I will receive everything, I will give nothing. And even when you're doing everything that I need done, I still might cry and protest and make your life hell. So everything beyond that was conditioned, right. And so if it was conditioned, that means that we can decondition.

Speaker 2:

And so worthiness? It's not even a concept that mind understands very well, because there's nothing quantitative about it. We can't measure it, we can't determine how much we have, nor how much anybody else has, and so we start to poke holes in this argument that's just been living rent-free in our mind because we've never considered it. And when we begin to do that, then what happens is a reticulating activating system, which is our mind's filter, starts to notice new stuff. And so it'll start to notice gee, yeah, this person that's charging less, I'm noticing that you know a lot of her clients aren't very happy. Or you know, I'm noticing that actually there's, there are people that are charging more than me, that are doing awesome, huh.

Speaker 2:

And so you'll start to bring in new information because you've taken the time to poke holes in this, this argument that's been in your brain, that that you haven't paid any attention to until this point. So I think that's probably the easiest one to talk about here on the podcast, whereas the body healing and some of the unconscious reprogramming. We do that I give a lot of bonuses with the book and so there's guided visualizations and things that get you into the state where I can access your unconscious mind and where I can help you move energy in your body a little harder to do on the podcast. So that's why we'll focus on conscious mind, because that's something you could. You did that thought exercise with us just now and hopefully started to see where you can step into charging more and kind of disregarding this whole concept of worthiness.

Speaker 1:

You know it's. It's fascinating, emily. I was in Nashville at a conference last week and speaking about worthiness, interestingly enough, and authenticity, and what came up for a lot of people is everyone could get their head around "'Okay, yeah, I'm a spiritual being "'having a human experience, "'we're not fully aware of how this whole human experience "'is supposed to go, but we collect data right', and so I can get on board with "'I'm inherently worthy for all the things? And yet my conscious mind still looks for evidence to prove my worth. So it's almost like this internal argument going on where everyone's like I'm totally on board, yeah, we are inherently worthy because we're here and it's in our being, not in our doing. And then the very next breath is but I need to show myself I can do this before I feel it. And you're like well, that's a complete contradiction to what you just said. Totally, totally. And the conscious mind, that analytical mind's like and this is the way it will stay, I'm in control.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah. No, you're exactly right, and that's why I try to work with conscious mind, because it's like the more we can get conscious mind on board and unconscious mind and body, then then we experience what we call alignment Right, and so it's like if, if it's only part of us, but we don't feel like we have any evidence in support of it. That's a problem, and that's why I think you're doing such a service with a podcast like this, because tuning into things like this helps you collect evidence. It doesn't have to be your own, it can be other people's, and one of the most powerful pieces of evidence is if she can do it, I can do it.

Speaker 1:

So true, so true, and you need some sort of your mind asks for it. Well, show me someone who's done it. But once you see it, you're like, okay, there's a possibility, it opens the door. Tell me a little bit about what personal or maybe even client experiences shaped the content of the book the most, because I know you have a lot of data in this book. There are a lot of personal stories. You have extensive coaching experience. When you sat down to write the book, what really shaped the way the content came together the most?

Speaker 2:

the way the content came together the most. Yeah, so I knew it was important for me to include my own personal stories and to not hold back. I talk about getting involved in an overseas Ponzi scheme and losing a bunch of money. I talk about orgasms in this book, which was like such a fricking edge for me. I'm like, are my parents going to read this? But it felt really important to include all of my stuff and I knew I didn't only want to include my story because it's like truth of the matter is I'm a white woman living in the United States.

Speaker 2:

I grew up in a two-parent household. We never struggled to keep food on the table. We were very middle class, and so, while I had my own struggles with money and my thoughts and feelings about money, not everybody's going to resonate with that and they shouldn't. I love that there's so many money teachers out there anyway, because there's something for everybody.

Speaker 2:

But I really wanted to include some client stories because I have different clients where a different money wound is strongest for them and it maybe is one that I haven't really personally experienced that much, and so, even though I can talk about it from a coach's perspective, I'm like I want the person who's lived it to share what it felt like, where they think it came from, what they've done to work on it, and so I invited some clients to contribute. I did interviews with them and then pulled relevant parts of the interviews to include in the book, and then we do some fun stuff in the book as well. To me, the best education is entertaining. It's like when you nail that, then it's so easy for people to want to tune in and learn it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I always say if you can tell a good story, people will be hooked. That's it. I know Like I'm still mad at my history teachers growing up, because I'm like how did you make this so boring? It didn't have to be no.

Speaker 2:

Like now I look back on those same things in history and I'm like this is like would be fascinating fiction, right. Like back on those same things in history and I'm like this is like would be fascinating fiction. Right, like they've made incredible movies on this, but somehow you made it so boring that all of us didn't even want to learn it. Which is like how so definitely took the opposite approach in this book. So we also look at, like Warren Buffett, for example, we look at lottery winners and their actual stories and what they say, what people around them say about the experience, and so there's a lot of teaching through story, as well as sharing the concept and some of the data. So that way, it's like again, we're appealing to unconscious mind that thinks in story and visuals. We're appealing to conscious mind that likes data and facts to back it up, and there's just something in there for everyone.

Speaker 1:

I love that. I know that you talk about how wealth actually amplifies who we already are at our core.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

How can people ensure that, as they're building wealth, they're also building alignment? Because I know a lot of people who've made a lot of money who actually aren't very aligned and consequently aren't very happy. And if we're going to do this, we ought to be doing it in a way that creates joy right, that reflects joy, that brings more joy, that inspires others to do that way. How do you help people understand the importance and ensure that wealth building has to be completely connected to their values and who they are authentically? Because one way that maybe you make money might not be the same way I make money as an entrepreneur, just simply because of the way our value systems and our own authentic expression show up, and I don't know that a lot of people understand the nuance.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I mean there's so much to this. Part of it is healing the evil money wound. So a lot of our fear around being wealthy is related to that, that there's something inherently wrong with being rich or being wealthy. And then there's the other kind of similar perspective to that, which is I'll have to do something bad or something against my values in order to be rich. And so we heal those two things. When we heal the evil money wound which is super important because otherwise we just block it it's like, oh, if I think that I'm going to screw this up or I'm going to do something bad.

Speaker 2:

But the thing is is that we've got the old paradigm, where we've seen lots and lots of examples of making money in misaligned ways and then kind of not necessarily doing bad things with the money, but kind of more the power. It's like the power of the statue. You get the money, then you're not a good person. We've got tons of evidence of that. And then we're building new paradigm wealth, and there are examples of this too, and my definition of new paradigm wealth is that the way the money comes to you feels really great and feels in alignment with your sole mission, and so it's not just once I have the wealth, what I'm going to do with it, but it acknowledges the way that you're getting it.

Speaker 2:

The scariest thing for people building new paradigm wealth is recognizing that you have to face the projections of the people who are still resonant with the old paradigm. What I mean by that is there will be people that judge you as being bad or wrong. You will be the villain in someone else's story on your way to wealth. It just will happen, and this is an opportunity to really decide that you can handle it, and that, in order for you to be part of the new paradigm and make that the predominant narrative that it's so good to be wealthy and that people with wealth do really great things with it you have to be strong enough to not let other people's projections get in the way. And so to me, that's like can we all just link arms and say that we're willing to do it and that we're not going to let other people's judgments and projections stop us?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I mean such an important point because we talk about the fact that what somebody else thinks about us is none of our business, and the reality is it's very wounding for us to feel like something like no, no, I'm not a fraud. This is actually because it's in flow and alignment doesn't mean that it's wrong. I'm solving problems. You hear a lot of of old paradigm money believers you know what they believe saying well, that can't possibly be ethical because it's coming too easy for her and if it's too easy, it must be wrong. There must be something wrong about it and it's just bumping up against all of those old money wounds. Right.

Speaker 2:

Totally. Yeah, I mean, I started playing with running ads this past year and you know you want to see what people think about you. Run some ads to cold traffic, to people who don't know anything about you, you know, and it's like actually most, most of my stuff is really really well received, but I definitely will get comments where it's people are like I bet you don't actually have any money. Oh, here's just another con artist, oh, here's someone just trying to scam people, and it's like I could let that stop me. But why? Because I know that more money in my hands is a good thing for the planet, not just for me, not just for my family, but for my community, my state, my country, my planet.

Speaker 2:

And I believe that for all heart-centered humans like, having more money is a good thing, and I also don't believe that money is a finite resource. So I don't believe that you having more takes it away from me or anybody else. And and that's a huge shift and we do talk about that a little bit in the book as well because as long as you think it's finite, then it is kind of like well, what the heck you took the last serving of food when there were 10 people waiting in line and haven't had any yet. Yeah, that does sound greedy.

Speaker 1:

You know, and I find I don't know if this is the case for you, but it's often the toughest with women, because traditionally we've had limited access to power and seats at the table. And then we bring this even into the entrepreneurial space, thinking well, if you're doing well, that must mean I'm doing something wrong. And there's this inability to say no, like look at what she's doing. She's doing really right. What can you learn from that? What might she teach you? Like? This is evidence. You know, there's no shame in saying, hey, I was doing something different, maybe there's something over here. I should be trying. And I think a lot of people are like no, well, that's her thing. And it's really convoluted how we take away our own power. It's not even men keeping it from us, it's us keeping it from ourselves, which is even, I think, more detrimental, right?

Speaker 2:

It is. It's the saddest thing, because women are meant to be collaborative and naturally that's actually what we're very good at is seeing the strengths in other people and figuring out how to bring people in to be part of it. Right Like, the lionesses are the ones who go and hunt because when they bring back food, they make sure the whole tribe is fed, whereas the lion will just eat all the food left to his own devices.

Speaker 1:

I have goosebumps from that. That's such a great analogy. Thank you for sharing that. That gave me goosebumps. We can draw from actual examples in nature. That's right. They are not clouded by good, bad, evil and other things, they just act on instinct.

Speaker 2:

That's right, Absolutely so. That is. Our innate instinct is to make sure that the collective is taken care of and that there's enough to go around and that there's enough for everyone. Now, what happened is that then there's a time in not very distant past where the only way that women could stay alive was to implicate another woman. So if you're accusing me of being a witch and I say no, no, it's not me, it's actually this other woman. That's how I stay alive and that's how she dies. And unfortunately, we're really not recovered from that yet. And so a lot of women go into relationships with other women with a feeling of mistrust and concern. And what does she think about me? And I don't know, would we get along in a way that men don't? But it's not because it's in our inherent nature. It's just that we have this sister wound that we haven't healed yet because of all of that betrayal that happened in recent history.

Speaker 1:

It's fascinating. I always say the people you want to try to work with and collaborate with are the ones that have really worked on themselves and that are feeling secure. Because you can find a lot of confident, incredibly intelligent, well-intentioned people that have deep-seated insecurities about money and other things. And that is where the problems start, because if their cup isn't already full and they go into partnership with you, things can go haywire pretty quickly. But if their cup's already full and they're already feeling the inherent worth and they're feeding their own needs, they're coming to the table 100%. They're coming to the table whole and so they're in overflow and so they're an overflow. They're willing to give and take and adapt and meet you halfway and compromise, because it's not taking from them. They can manufacture it. So I always say you know, be really conscientious about this. I think there are a lot of really well-intentioned people, but if they're not doing the work to heal, inevitably problems are going to arise. So just be aware when you're doing those sort of things.

Speaker 1:

I have to congratulate you on your podcast. Welcome to the 2% Club, thank you. Super exciting, super exciting. So the podcast is called the Joyous Path to Millions, and I know you share so many conversations are so rich. There's so many golden nuggets in there. I really encourage everyone to go and take a listen. I'll include the link in the show notes, but I'm curious in terms of your own experience and interviewing people and doing your own shows. What are maybe some of the things that you've learned and unexpected lessons along the way about wealth and success on your podcasting journey that have come up that maybe surprised you?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I mean, I think we all secretly hope that there's this one thing, that there's the magic bullet right, the strategy, the thing that changed everything. And yet, the more I dive into women's stories of what happened on the way to wealth, it was never one thing and it was never a strategy. It was always an energy thing, it was always shifts in mindset and beliefs and doing the inner work. And anyone who's doing the inner work which I'm sure everyone listening to this podcast is knows that it's never a switch, it's always a dial, knows that it's never a switch, it's always a dial. And you know, it's a little bit annoying that that's true, because it's like, oh, here's another person. That's like saying you know, you just choose a different thought and thought by thought by thought by thought, you, you change your thoughts, which changes your feelings, which changes your actions, which changes the results. And it's like I think we kind of wish there was a different equation, because it's just not that sexy.

Speaker 1:

But it's yes, and this and this and this, it's all the ands, right, yeah?

Speaker 2:

Yeah and that, but that's what's effective and that's what's sustainable. You know, anything that's a switch can also just get like quickly switched off, and I've seen that. I've seen people who have been a match for like a high, high, but then it's like followed by a low, low, and when you do the sustainable work in my experience and I've had so many guests on the show resonate with this it feels really slow while you're doing it, and it's not until you stop and look back that you're like oh, actually, I've come a really long way and it actually happened really fast. Wow, what do you know?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, time flies by and it's very relative, but when you're going through it it doesn't feel so fast. But it's true, when you look back you're like, oh my gosh, and that wasn't just one thing.

Speaker 2:

No, it's everything, it never is ever just one thing.

Speaker 1:

But let's go back to the energy thing for a minute, because I think it's such a powerful reminder for everyone. You can think all the good thoughts you want and you can do all the visual thoughts you want, and you can do all the visualizations and all the affirmations and write things down and do all the self-care, but if, energetically, you're not in that space with that which you want to experience, it's sort of a moot point. And I do this, you know, I was in the corporate world as well for a really long time, for more than 25 years and everyone's like how is it you're so successful in sales? Sales are so hard and we're communicators and marketers. It's not really our thing.

Speaker 1:

And you know, like let's boil it right down, because it's not really about selling. It's really about energetically showing up a certain way and being in alignment and allowing the space for the others to enter the energetic field with you. And then we go on the journey together. And so a lot of people are like it's that easy. I'm like it is that easy and yet not a lot of people are entering the energetic field to go down the journey with you, because a lot of people are like it's got to be harder than that. I've got to get smarter on this, or I have to know this product more, or I have to push more and I'm like how's that working for?

Speaker 2:

you.

Speaker 1:

I mean, sometimes it works right. And that's where I think, unfortunately, like, people are like but it worked for me. Then and I'm like but you're strung out, you're burnt out, it's not sustainable. Let's go through all the things Right. What if it could be easy? What if it really is about how you show up?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I mean, I love that you're talking about this. Amen, keep, like every episode. Can you just remind all of us? But it's so true. It's like my favorite clients are the ones that just seem to pop out of nowhere and are like I know I'm meant to work with you. Here's what I want to do. It's like there's no convincing needed because they've followed their own intuition. And then there's this beautiful unfolding and they start making more money than they've ever made, and it gets easier than it ever was, and there's strategic things we do and energetic things we do. But it's really probably that we had a sole contract. So before we all came into the human experience, we had already decided like We'll meet you at this point in this time, see you then, yeah, see you.

Speaker 2:

Then I'm going to hire you, you're going to help me with this, and here's how it's all going to work. And so you're right, can we have more belief in the unseen than in the seen? And it's so much easier to think that it's the funnel, or that it's the copy or the social media post or the reel that went viral or any of those things, because they're more tangible. But, of course, the greater potency is in the unseen, and that's just the funky thing about this experience that we're in is what seems real is unreal, and what seems unreal is real.

Speaker 1:

I love this. I could sit here and talk with you all day long, emily. Okay, for those listeners, I know there aren't a lot of you out there, but for those who may be sitting on the fence going, I'm still feeling skeptical about the idea that wealth, generation and joy can coexist. What would you say to them to help them see the possibility of aligning the two?

Speaker 2:

I would say, like, run your own experiment and find out. Like, bring a playful curiosity to this Because, yeah, I could tell you like, go listen to my podcast or go listen to back episodes of this podcast and you'll find lots of evidence of other people. But play with it. You know like what, what would feel joyful today at work and put it out there and say what, if I've had clients do this and they're like Emily, you're not going to believe it. My boss was like why don't you go home early today? Why don't you you know what? I have to leave for a dentist appointment, why don't you just leave to just take the afternoon off? Like it can happen that fast.

Speaker 2:

And as you build your own evidence, you'll see that there is this other way. And it's like I think I like what Abraham Hicks says, where it's like we came because we wanted to be on the leading edge of manifestation and we wanted to experience co-creation. Said in another way, it's like we wanted to be playing the video game and seeing how our moves change the game and how we can, you know, find like the secret mushroom, that when you jump and you get that one, you grow wings and all of a sudden, you're flying up in the clouds and you're getting these special coins that you couldn't get when you were down running through the trees.

Speaker 1:

So it's like and you just went through six quantum levels of it.

Speaker 2:

Yes, it's like that's. That's like that's why we came, and so run the experiment. You already know what it's like doing it the way you're doing it. Why not try? Try a new way, see if you can make it more joyful, and even ask yourself this is the crazy thing, especially for women we don't know what we want and we don't know what will bring us joy, unless we've really spent some time with it, and so maybe even just sitting with that question would be a beautiful first step.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, no, you're a thousand percent correct on that one. You know, the most important four word question you can ever ask yourself is what do I want? And it's not a selfish thing, because it gets to the root of why you're here. And a lot of people are unable to turn off the noise that's going on in their head in order to hear those whispers going on in their heart. But that's exactly what we need to be doing.

Speaker 1:

Emily, first of all, I just want to thank you for coming on the show today. It's been so enlightening, so gratifying. I feel such a great deep soul connection to you. I'm so impressed with the body of work that you have created and that you continue to evolve. Thank you for putting it out there in the world for all of us to up-level and get to the next space that we're all meant to do.

Speaker 1:

I'm a firm believer, and everyone listening to this show hears this a lot, but I'm gonna repeat it for Emily's sake, that we're all here to walk each other home. Yes, right, we're all here to walk each other home, and you're helping us do it in a way where we can see wealth as a positive thing, where we can actually and, I think in the totality of wealth, enjoy our lives in a different way and also recognize that when we talk about joy and wealth, we're not talking about a perfect life. I'm sure Emily has days that are go haywire and are turned upside down, but it's this idea of recognizing that we're here to experience the fullness of life that's what makes it extraordinary.

Speaker 2:

Yes, amen. Thank you so much for having me on the show.

Speaker 1:

It's been an absolute pleasure. I would be remiss if I didn't ask you and I know I'm frozen here, so everybody bear with us for a second. What does it mean to you, emily, to live your extraordinary life?

Speaker 2:

It really is bringing intention and choice into the simple moments. I get so much joy out of being in this season of life where my daughter's really into softball and my son is learning baseball and like when he gets a hit, it's like, yes, this is amazing. And when we're hosting pool parties in the backyard, it's like it's creating the life that feels extraordinary to us, which it's very rarely. The grandiose things I do have 180 degree ocean views. I have a lot of beautiful, incredible things, but it's the simple connections, the simple pleasures and choosing more of that and bringing that intention in and really being present in those moments when they're happening.

Speaker 1:

That sounds wonderful, Absolutely divine. Well with that, Emily, thank you for your time and until next time everyone, go and live your extraordinary life.

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Michelle Rios

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